#to bleed is so! damn! good!
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i’ll be good by jaymes young
you know i am out here writing 5 different iterations of tender loving Lilith & this is what i'm saying!!
"grace is just weakness/ or so i've been told/ i've been cold"
"the blood on my hands scares me to death"
"i'll be good, i'll be good/ and i'll love the world like i should/ i'll be good, i'll be good/ for all the times i never could"
GIVE LILITH PERMISSION TO BE SOFT IN THE YEAR OF OUR LORD 2023
for any who desire soft!Lilith. anyone who wants to see her get the bestest the most beautiful post s2 arc
-> check out my bestie's fic To Bleed
you will thank me
#i actually rlly like this song & have it on a couple playlists#so good instincts anon#to bleed is so! damn! good!#honestly it will make you want to chew drywall. i love it very#thanks anon!#casper song recs
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The Recruit s02e01: “I'm feeling a little bit... lightheaded.”
#whumpedit#therecruitedit#the recruit netflix#the recruit#owen hendricks#noah centineo#blood loss#bleeding#tied up#restrained#dizzy#blood#pale#on his knees#held at gunpoint#flinching#fear#my gifs#whump#the recruit spoilers#what a way to start the new season so damn (whumpy) good
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We all know Timmy is Wanda’s mama’s boy but we need to keep in mind he’s still Cosmo’s kid too and that Cosmo would love him just as vehemently as Wanda
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#fairly oddparents#not that anyone has portrayed him different#certainly not distance he loves Timmy he probably says it the most in the show and in fanon#but still- watching New Wish there felt like there was a disconnect with Cosmos character-like he wasn’t as well defined as he was in OG#that’s in part due to them toning him down from being an idiot plain and simple but I feel like it wasn’t fitted with something else it was#simply taken away#just to say he didn’t have as much of a presence to me in New Wish as Wanda did and I crave spinning Cosmo around in my brain#I want to see Poof being his Dad’s Boy yknow and I want to see cosmo doting and I want to see when he gets like. parental rage for the sake#of his kids#yknow? Yknow? part of him feeling detached in a new wish has translated into him not wanting to get as close to Hazel as he did Timmy-#to try and play it more like godparents are supposed to- just a presence for a couple months#but also because like. he got SO attached to Timmy and he’ll never regret it and he’d never do anything different#but idk. if it were me I wouldn’t have the capacity to go through losing my godkid again after becoming that attached#that’s not even mentioning that they don’t HAVE to be in hazel’s life the same way they were in Timmy’s because Timmy was going through#neglect and Hazel has loving family and friends all around her at all times- her blocks are mental#in that way cosmo and Wanda just have to do the Typical Godparent Job of aiding her- not becoming people she desperately needs in life#which also bleeds into why I think Peri was having such a. difficult time#godparents aren’t supposed to be attached the way his family was to Timmy and that how he learned it#but his first godkid is Not Easy and lends immediately to the issues Timmy was having where he HAS parents he HAS things (though . Timmy#was not rich and would sometimes not be fed… dev’s dad also forgets to feed him but dev is still able to eat you know)#and how he grew up with his parents as godparents and how he’s been taught are conflicting and it’s nature vs doing a good job quoteunquote#I didn’t mean to ramble so damn much in the tags I’m really sorry#told myself if I had more to say I’d write it down and post it later but I must be heard.
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Listen.... Trafalgar Law is like Opposite Pick Me Girl.
Evidence:
He stole Doffy's whole look down to the shirtless sluttiness, feather coat and the earrings.
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He COPIED DOFFY'S ACTIVATION METHOD. How "notice me, senpai!!" is THAT!?
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Like Doflamingo, he acts as though your attempts at torturing him are absolutely precious.
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Law straight up based his jolly roger on Doffy's. Like it's not even kinda subtle. (Not that Law does subtle. Which is weird for someone trying SO HARD to be dark, mysterious, and edge-y as Kikoku. )
Trafalgar spent years of his life travelling around the world, gaining notoriety and power, putting into place a series of intricate moving parts that all had to come together in just the right way all so Doflamingo would notice him and remember his face forever.
Law: Please, Young amaster-sama! Oh, please pick me!
Law: To kick your pathetic, subhuman ass.
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[Thanks to @revlischarm who gave me this idea.]
#Law is a TERRIBLE pick me girl#it's never a good sign when they ask you to pick them and also your own coffin (assuming there are any recognizable remains)#Doffy-sama notice me!#I want you to look me in the eyes when I killed you#guys were were two weeks away from Law's obsession getting so bad he'd atatt wearing sunglasses at night#Thank goodness Zoro was there yo distract him aftwr Dressrosa#boy was floating in a empty void; no idea what to do with himself#“He was my future; I spent my whole life looking for him... wanting him.”#“bleeding out in my hands begging for mercy while I spit in his face and promised I'd show him the same mercy he showed Cora-san”#*everyone takes a solid three step back from Law*#*well everyone but Zoro and Robin. They're into this.*#one piece#trafalgar d. water law#trafalgar law#donquixote doflamingo#absolutely fabulous#evil never looked so good#though not so much evil as hell bent on revenge is pretty damn sexy too#all of this was for you Cora-san!#I did all this - risked my life and limbs - just to die in battle to honor your sacrifice and get you the revenge you deserve!#Oh#Oh Law baby#that's not what Cora wanted for you AT ALL#you sweet little revenge muffin
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Shit take no one wants but Danny wouldnt trust any of the batfam. Like not a one of them.
Boy isnt trained like they are to notice peoples habits and tiks but he has one hell or a vibe check. He can’t tell they are hiding something everytime one approached him to try and see if hes a mata and or alright.
Some of them are clearly not ok by a living human standard but Danny isnt gonna out himself to weird vibe strangers. He didn’t even tell his sister now did he? He probably would t have told(watch this) Tucker and Sam if they hadn’t of been there.
Now I aint sayin he wouldnt reach out as Phantom to like check on their ectoplasm and maybe help em out, lord knows Jason could use some helpin out in that department. I also aint sayin the batfam would figure him out, they do be smart. But if Danny is in Gothem and he comes across a Bat in gear and outta gear hes probably gonna put two and two together. I always operate on ghostking au so im assuming hes gotten better at recognising ecto signatures.
Lord knows if it’s Jason/redhood than hes gonna for sure notice that one.
#danny phantom#dp x dc#dpxdc#sorry if this sucks my way of talkin bleeds out into my typin the more tired I get#yall see what I done did with tucker and sam up there? everyone always writes em sam and tucker. why she always get to be first. aint fair#but anyway danny can’t trust anyone with the fear his parents put in him from constantly hating phantom even though our boy was tryin his—#— darnedest to do good#lord my cat is yellin at me to exit this damned shower so I’ll talk to yall later k#kisses u#im so tired and done with everything I think im a just keep on keepin on
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man. apologies to anyone who tried to talk to me yesterday and was met only by someone out of their gourd. i got VERY high yesterday i’m almost surprised i’m not still feeling it
#marzi speaks#not regretting it. the whole point was to celebrate me registering for classes#and i took a larger dose than i’d normally go for bc i knew i wanted it to hit#but damn.#i was. not thinking much yesterday#which is funny bc i was still good at pjsk. how i fced intense voice in like 3 tries i am not sure#the high did have a casualty tho. cut my finger on a bread knife </3#thankfully even that knife is pretty sharp so the cut was clean. bleeding was stopped quick and it wasn’t too deep#and i did a great job with the band aid that baby is secure#i’m more irritated that it’s gonna take a while to heal (steroids)#than i am worried abt the cut itself#i do remember thinking ‘i cannot let my dad see that i just cut my finger or else i will not be allowed near knives when i’m high again’#even tho he’d probably just go ‘ah well lesson learned. glad u didn’t panic’
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Impressive action heroes! So cool and dashing and daring! (From he/re, meme still open ♥)
#My art#SCII#Damned#DAX#The Captain#Blood#I used YellowA4 and PinkC7 :3#The full round robin! :D It seemed only right hehe <3#Zarla asked for ZEX nad DAX - Alana ZEX and Zelnick - so I get DAX and Zelnick! Hehe ♪♫#There's still more yet! Just gotta Actually warmup properly on a more regular basis lol#Serendipity that the ones I chose weren't overlaps despite being a surprise :3c How fun!#Ahhh things I enjoy drawing so much! Blood and sparkles hehe#Poor DAX - he does look good tho :)#Bleeding? Someone else's blood on him? :) Could be either#Probably could've gone even a bit more splattery but the original shapes hwah!#Zelnick's felt obvious hehe <3 Sunshine boy gets sparkly star eyes!#Soft-shaped to be flowerlike :3#Gosh he's cute#They're all cute! ♥
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i see the fucking House got destroyed. aewseoekme 👍
#love that /sarcasm#what else what else... [redacted] SHSJSDJSJSKXKXDK LMFAO#but seriously uhhjhjjhuhj#fuckinnnnn. roll call. i guess#wil is up and awake. so am i. i can feel damien???? that's unusual. uhhh#cosm's asleep. lim's asleep. ethan's asleep. blanket and the captain are afk but they generally Are.#memento and mori are... not on this layer? alright damn.#i give you two a room in the Manor and yet you don't use it ok i see how it is (joke)#fuckinnnnnnn....... who else was effected by that? i think that's everyone?#i th. hold on#oh that's great i think i. mhm. i see. yeah okay ouch#headspace form took more damage my eye socket has scabs everywhere. aweseoekemmmee i love it here waow. anyways#besides THAT. i think everyone's fine 👍#we survived babey! yippee!#pk;m Dark🗝️🥀#the House itself has scars now but those SHOULD fade... hopefully. fbfbfndjdjf#it's not bleeding or anything so that's good!
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i ... finished... all of the panels in this feh strip ................ \o/
#LOTS of cleaning up + consistency edits + doing the full color cover if i have time but!!!#rereading it several times in full and like full on SMILING through actual sobs good god#without irony this is the best damn piece of art i've ever done. like not even just for *me* it's damn good storytelling imo#like it goes from shitposty to feelsy to so cringehonest it's ALMOST cheesy to subtle fridge horror back to [ungodly whale noises]#but the pacing works. i still crack up at the same places etc etc. aaaa i can't wait to show it.#this is one of those that even with a critic's scathing eye i can see the sincerity bleeding through every line
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?????? Why did he tell me everything was fine if my insurance requires me to have been on hormones for 2 years to approve the procedure. . .why didn't he say they won't approve it if that wasn't the case. . .is that outdated information???? Maybe we can lie????
Am i seriously about to have all of my fucking hype crushed???? Maybe I can convince my doctors to lie for me or we can say I was doing it DIY for a few years. People ask how long I've been on hormones a lot because my voice is pretty deep and I look pretty masculine surely we could get away with this???
I feel really fucking beaten down now. Why not stop the discussion and go 'hey they require X amount of time on hormones'. . .I really hope I can convince my providers to fudge the truth for me a little or i'm going to lose my mind i seriously don't know how well i'm going to take it if i can't get this done???? Like I already feel so anxious at the thought. Please everything about me needs this. I am going to go fucking insane if this can't happen this year.
#i suddenly feel very stressed about my fourth floor window#i don't know if i'm going to direct the violence at myself or someone else and i'm just hoping i won't have violence to direct at all#i feel so so fucking stressed out. why wasn't this the first thing i was told???????????#please please cooperate with me doctor and therapist please i haven't felt suicidal in over a year please we cannot ruin this#i feel dizzy i feel dizzy i feel dizzy i'm too stressed about this please i'm gonna fucking break down i'm gonna fucking cry what if they#say no what if they want proof i was doing it before i met them i'm feeling so lightheaded and i'm lying down lmao???#what if i say i was on hormones before and i had to stop taking them will that throw a wrench in things????? i'm going to lose my shit#guys my year may be fucking ruined everything was going so well despite the state of the world despite everything#i need these women to lie for me. one small lie for one dumb fucker's wellbeing. surely they can agree to this? surely if i tell them how#scared i am they'll agree to say one little lie for me#i feel like scratching myself til i bleed rn hhhhhaaaa didbcueiebdj good thign i cut my nails the other day because them shits were SHARP#okay. okay. all i have to do is ask. i may not get an answer from one until tomorrow but these are very good people they have been#kind to me so far and good to me so far and they understand how important this is#my doctor has a nonbinary kid!!!! surely she'll be able to ask them for advice if she isn't sure please i'm going to throw up and i haven't#even eaten yet please don't take this out from under me this close. please don't rip this away from me when everything is going so well#please don't try and take this from me under this current administration that's trying to take everything from us#please#danie yells at existence#suicidal ideation cw#self harm mention?#I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO TAG THIS I'VE NEVER FELT SO BAD I HAD TO GET IT OUT OF MY HEAD HERE BEFORE i'm gonna send them messages and hope they#respond soon. if they don't. idk. i ask how much it'll be out of pocket#i wanna rock back and forth i need to eat and take my meds i wish i'd done that before i got started#like damn i bet my anti-anxiety meds would have been REALLY helpful right about now! shame i haven't taken them since yesterday!#and i didn't take the ones i'm supposed to take last night either because i was so distracted by. ider what i was doing the insomnia was#kicking my ass til about 6am though#so I'm running on like nothing here. which isn't helping.#i know. i know if it doesn't happen i'll live i'll survive i'll be fine but mother of god jt doesn't feel like it#it doesn't feel like it'd be worth it to have to like like this for two more years#i've already been living like this for like. idk. at least 12 years.
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I love r&j and I'm always gonna have a soft spot for it as my first favorite shakespeare play. but the older I get, and the more I experience and the more I endure, the more hamlet speaks to me on such a visceral emotional level. loss of a loved one. inability to grieve properly. anger with no target. striking when you should hold back; holding back when you should strike. betrayal of trust, to hurt you or to help you, but it stings like a knife in your back either way. losing hold of yourself behind the mask. wanting the dead so desperately that you forget the living. when will it end? when will the pain be over? alas, poor yorick; your father is dead.
#hamlet#personal ramblings#I'm running on like 2 hours of sleep but I was just so consumed by my love for this play I had to type a post that will get 3 notes maximum#shakespeare had such a chokehold on what it means to be human and to love and lose and it bleeds out of every single tragedy he wrote#every time I reread hamlet it hits me like a punch in the guy and the killing blow is always something different every time#damn good play.
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#horrible leg cramps have calmed a bit but are continuing along with thumpy heartrate increase#and my magnesium supplement is out of date and i'm not trying to go out after more#look up leg cramps just to see if there's helpful advice#let's see continuing leg cramps causes: diabetes ✔️ okay. thyroid issues ✔️ vitamin deficiencies yeah ik. severe anemia too ✔️#this does not narrow it down at all#oh also cholesterol medications too so ✔️#but the only one the dr has been calling me to come in for is the anemia so ...#just why suddenly after work you know? like they still *function* fine it's just this constant 'something is wrong'#ever since i got sick my body chemistry has been utterly whacked and now i'm not sick but it's getting weirder not better#i have had leg cramps before (why i had the magn and potassium supplements) but they went away after i slept#these went away then came back also they showed up just as i was feeling better#after a day of just feeling the malaise of a bad day spent feeling 'something is wrong' but nothing specific enough to identify#so like it was a good sogn bc i felt better but now it keeps on and i'm feeling bad again#i really hope it *is* the anemia because it would explain it but damn how am i gonna function until friday i can't sleep#and also like i've been whete these numbers are at before so why is it so much worse so suddenly#that's what's worrisome - where are all my red blood cells going? bc that means the internal bleeding thing is back on the table#well or the bone cancer?#there are too many things that could cause the same symptoms what tge fuck#torn between just taking aleve until nothing hurts (except if it's my kidneys ... or hey my stomache bc nsaids)#and packing a hospital bag just in case because catastrophisizing is what you do when you're home by yourself#it's so hard to tell when you're fat but you *think* you've been losing a weird amount of weight for no known reason#ignire this i'm typing it out bc i need to put it down somewhere and this blog is like a journal
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I have been fighting this bandit for over 2 hours. I could easily walk away and beat his brains in with a rock later, but my pride tells me surely if I try again I'll be able to overpower him with my bare hands this time.
#kingdom come deliverance 2#kcd2#I'm getting SO good at dodging#which helps until this fucker does his gapcloser and instantly causes a brain bleed#kill first guy sheathe sword punch shield until it breaks ez strat got him to low HP#THEN HE ANNIHILATES ME. EVERY GOD DAMN TIME.
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:3
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Definitely doesnt represent anything in my life or smth lol.
Just a pretty tattoo
#damn the tattoo artist was good#there wasnt literally almost no blood between the days this tatt was healing#like damn~#being with her for like 1.5 years#so learned way too much#to the point im not bleeding like i was just stabbed numerous times
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Favorite Batman character and why
(Full disclosure am drunk while writing this)
What a great question! I would say it’s a tie between Dick Grayson and Jason Todd for a variety of reasons. For me, they’re both comfort characters that I relate to in different ways. Dick has that oldest sibling syndrome and would rather burn the world for someone else than admit that he needs a shoulder to lean on. Jason was a bright eyed child who went through some shit, and is learning to cope with what happened to him.
But aside from personally relating to them, I just REALLY love their characters. And the quirky little things that they’ve done over the years with their characters. I love the idea that Hayley’s Circus was a breeding ground for Talons - and Dick would have ended up a talon if his parents weren’t murdered and he was adopted by Bruce.
I also adore All Blades Jason. I wish that they’d bring him back. Like fuck it was so good, he deserves to be a magic boy.
That’s all may edit when I’m sober again.
#batman#jason todd#red hood#batfam#dick grayson#tim drake#nightwing#red robin#batman wayne family adventures#all blades#all blades Jason Todd#sorry i’m drunk#talon dick grayson#I love the idea that Hayley’s was a talon breeding ground#like shit that’s so good#and dick going undercover?#god damn#Jason Todd as a magic boy fills me with joy#give him a magical girl transformation#not just imma bleed and summon some swords#still pretty great tho
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I am going to continue believing that Kalluzeb will appear in the Ahsoka show together because I may look like a stupid clown bitch but it will take a better man than Dave Filoni to pry my sense of optimism and hope out of my cold dead hands
#I am going to believe in the innate goodness of Man and trust that we won't get zorii blissed again if it kills me#I have seen many a no-homo in my time and I will probably see more and yet I trust that it will not happen for kalluzeb#take that cynicism and exhaustion of not seeing myself represented in any significant way in most Star Wars material#I mean come on zeb was literally one of the main characters in rebels it would be so damn important for him to be canonically gay#and also he has one of the most epic enemies to lovers arcs I've ever seen#so stupid clown bitch I may be but I am clutching optimism so hard it's going to bleed#star wars#ahsoka show#ahsoka series#kalluzeb#garazeb orrelios#zeb#alexsandr kallus#gay#martianbugsbunny ships
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