#rereading it several times in full and like full on SMILING through actual sobs good god | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

bored-storyteller · 4 years ago

Text

Okay, I humbly apologize. I had a bad time - and unfortunately it's not over 😩- but here's the second part with three other leaders. I know I know I know! Malleus is missing! I'll try to post Mal today too- tomorrow, it depends on where you are - I promise.

Please I know you love him so much but love me anyway 🥺

14- Dorm leaders x down!s/o pt.2

Kalim Al-Asim

· Kalim is magical and exhausting at the same time. Yes, s/o love him from the bottom of their hearts, but dealing with him in times of stress is exhausting.

· The young nobleman does not really know the stress, at least, for what s/o can see, and this leads him to overcome any worries. It's not that he doesn't want to see other people's problems, it's just that he can't think of them.

· S/o as the days go by they feel worse and worse. The head often hurts and tiredness brings them into a state of almost half asleep. If Kalim saw this he would be very worried about them, but their presence for him is a fact. He is convinced that if something went wrong s/o would tell him, right?

· But no. How could they say no to his requests? That is, actually there is not even time to refuse.

· Jamil is worried. He sees what is going on and tries to marginalize the problems. S/o should rest, they could ask him for help - as if he wasn't already doing everything in the dormitory-. But s/o know that the vice leader is already very busy, burdening him with their study problems and their worries is not the case.

Having to deal with Kalim really means having almost never breath. Even his affection can sometimes be a problem.

Yes, s/o certainly love him, but three days before the start of the test session, the thing more than making them happy is shaking them.

They have studied practically nothing and really feel their strength failing. While everyone is studying carefully, they are struggling to finish their homework for the next day.

The nights for s/o are now nothing more than a staring at the ceiling in desperate search for information that does not exist in their head. And the lessons are so heavy in the morning that their hope of getting through the year is almost zero.

Sometimes the idea of dropping out of school even went through their mind. They would certainly be freer.

Right now, s/o they are hiding in the bedroom, surrounded by study books.

It doesn't matter how much they read and reread those words, their overfull mind wanders over their fears, not making them memorize anything.

There is no way they can overcome this. They curl up on the bed, clutching their knees to their chests and doing everything they can to keep from crying.

Suddenly the door swings open. Kalim comes in with his cheer, filling the room with his happy voice.

It seems that he is excited about something, but s/o can’t help but look at him with wide eyes without understanding.

His exclamations echo in their heads as if it were empty, breaking the delicate crystal walls.

"Stop!" They cry when even the last fragile column of their sanity is brought down.

"Stop!" They repeat, bringing their hands to their faces and collapsing supine on the bed.

"Stop it! I can't take it any more! If I continue like this I will go crazy!"

The arms cover the face wet with tears. They are not really shouting at Kalim.

He stops suddenly, a little frightened by that reaction.

What happened? Where did he go wrong this time?

When the silence weighs too much, they still speak: "I ... I need to get out of here, I... don't want to be in this school anymore. "

Kalim listens in silence for a few moments to their sobs, then slowly, shyly, sits beside them on the bed.

"No ..." he murmurs, "I will help you, whatever your problem is." His voice is that of an injured child, but his arms raise s/o to his chest, to hold them against him and protect them.

"Everything will pass, I promise you. But I can't be without you."

The fingers pass slowly through the hair of s/o while his crimson eyes scan the books around them.

Kalim's arms hold them desperately. Right, how could they leave him alone? In short, who would help Jamil then?

That thought makes them smile, and while s/o get up seated they give to the boy a simple and light "ok", and then they resume the study with a quieter mind.

Kalim no longer talks, but neither does he leave, he simply remains close to them a little to comfort them, a little for the fear that they will move away from him, until he ends up falling asleep on their lap.

Vil Schoenheit

· Here, another guy who made stress his life. Some type of stress. Obviously, he must meet expectations.

· This also applies to those around him, or rather, to those who are close to his heart. If he demands so much from someone, it means that he cares about them. In a sense, even his insult when it is constructive is flattering.

· But for an already stressed s/o, dealing with him is extremely anxiety-provoking. You have to be perfect, everything has to be in order, and for an already fragile mind, well, the step to break is not far away.

· Still, he bears a great deal of stress on his shoulders without showing it, but he doesn't notice that others can sometimes be overwhelmed, and his manners aren't exactly delicate when it comes to appearances.

· S/o are almost afraid of him every time his eyes meet them. What will he say? What's wrong with them?

Yes, they know how important the smile is, but they can't do it. In the library they leaf through the book they hold in their hands with empty and dull eyes.

They don't have to look good, on the other hand disappointment for themselves keeps them up all night.

There is no way they can get through this period, not for how they are.

They sigh, placing the book on the shelves and giving up. They fold their arms on the table as they sit, and there they hide their tired faces.

S/o would like to go into hibernation, everything would be easier. No commitment, no judging eye ...

"S/o, my dear." The firm voice of the Poemfiore leader makes itself heard. It is firm, severe even if placid.

What's up now? Oh sure. They are not sitting upright with their backs. Hair is probably a mess and their eyes have been ruined for days. They already know to suck, there is no need for him to say it. They already hate each other, and there is no need for him to see how ugly their sticky face is with tears.

S/o do not move, as if he were not there, they remain closed inside themselves, in such a state of surrender that not even Vil can grasp immediately. But he understands that something is wrong. It never happened that they ignored him.

“S/o.” the name is repeated again, but this time it is accompanied by the delicate hand of the leader who touches the hair of s/o.

As soon as the fingertips touch the head, as if they were of fire, s/o spring back, scared as if they had a ferocious beast in front of them.

Vil stares at those eyes so full of fear. Afraid of him.

In their dark circles he sees all the suffering of those days, all the dozing sadness. And in that situation of desolation, they feared him as if he were their enemy, the one who wants to harm them.

"No… Please..."

A prayer comes out of their fragile lips as if he is ready to kill them. He's not sure if they're clear-headed... no, they seem to be in another world. A dark and lonely world.

Vil's white fingers caress s/o's chin. They do not retreat, but tremble as if they were blades.

"I won't hurt you. I'm just worried about you."

His words are clear, as always, but a little sweeter than usual. He patiently sits in front of them, without losing contact.

"You can tell me what troubles you."

Finally the gaze of s/o meets the beautiful eyes of the boy. Eyes so beautiful, admired, and at this moment sincere.

S/o they bend down again, resting their forehead on Vil's hand while holding it with theirs. There they cry, for once without the weight of the angry gaze, but only surrounded by affection, while Vil gently caresses their head.

Idia Shroud

· Ok, how to say, this guy is made of stress.

· Idia fears the social relationship, people stress him, what is not his room and his computer stresses him. He is not an easy person to manage.

· S/o are practically elected. They are fortunate to be admitted to his. In short, they can remain curled up on his bed without him saying anything.

· Usually are s/o who take care of him, who try to support him and calm him down, but sometimes of course they are the ones who need support ... but well, Idia practically doesn't exist.

· It is not his fault, but even if he cares about s/o in a way that even he did not believe possible, he is not good at social relationships. Very often he will limit himself and stay next to them, still connected to the internet. They don't mind, usually.

But this time the boy's body isn't even close to them. He is far away, in the darkness of the room, illuminated only by the screens. Yes, they are not even totally sure that he is aware of their presence.

Ortho, to their disappointment, is not present.

S/o don't need to be there, but for some time now they have felt a lump in their throat that they can't swallow. They have failed a test, and there is no way to recover it, or so they believe.

The truth is that they are nothingness.

They have to study, but loneliness echoes in their head. Nobody wants them.

So they slipped from the leader of Ignihyde to find comfort. It would have been fine even if he had been silently beside them, but no, he was elsewhere. They had seen an excited light in his eyes when they arrived. Maybe chat with someone online? Of course, those friends are better than them.

A failure, a weight, that's s/o.

Small tears wet the already dimly lit page.

In the darkness in which they find themselves, they sink into the anxiety and fear that they have been holding inside for weeks.

That horrible feeling of emptiness that causes the brain to tilt.

Idia does not notice the sobs. S/o are hidden, curled up into a ball on the boy's bed. Nothing makes sense to them anymore. More they cry, more they lose consciousness of their surroundings, and everything disappears.

Idia is too caught up in his game. He does not really notice that s/o are not well.

Only when he turns enthusiastically to communicate something to them does he hear them.

Sobs are louder now, but they don't know it.

Heart breaks in Idia. How long have they been crying? Two hours will have passed since they arrived. Why didn't they speak?

Oh God, it's his fault ... he sucks with people so badly, and he always ends up hurting them.

Maybe they came to him because somehow they believed he made them feel good, didn't they?

He gets up from his chair, unsure of what to do. Embarrassed he approaches them.

God, they seem so fragile. Will he break them if he touches them?

Slowly, as if he were dealing with a kitten, he places his sweatshirt on them, and then, a little scared, he sits next to them.

They seem lost, s/o don't react.

Idia feels the butterflies in his stomach from agitation. Suddenly, it seems to him that the figure of s/o is fading away in the dark of the room. It's scary.

Shyly he stretches his arms around the small figure and carefully pulls them into his chest.

He feels their sobs freeze for a moment, almost frightened, and then finally the muscles relax, while they abandon themselves to him.

"Sorry, I'm a delusion..." They murmur, clinging to him.

So is this what they think?

"No ... you ... I ... find you beautiful ..."

He speaks shyly. He's not exactly that these words are what they need, but that's what he really thinks.

His cheek is warm against their head. Maybe he's blushing.

How can they not smile at this?

#twisted wonderland #disney twisted wonderland #twst #kalim al asim #vil schoenheit #idia shroud #twst kalim #twst vil #twst idia #twisted wonderland idia #vil schoenheit x reader #kalim al asim x reader #idia shroud x reader #twst headcanons #scenarios #headcanons #request

255 notes · View notes

quietlysatan · 6 years ago

Text

An Invincible Summer - ShanaStoryteller, AO3

Link: Here!!

Rating: T for read the warnings, but don’t worry too much because of them

Favorite Quote(s): I legit wanna tattoo this next quote on me somewhere

"Oh, the things that can be accomplished through ignorance of their impossibility,"

And this Straight Up Fact

“There’s no such thing as cheating as long as you win,” Natsu says, and the brat’s not wrong.

This one’s just funny

“Chouza,” Inoichi forces himself to say evenly, “Your teachings produced Ebisu and goddamned Gai.”

“Genma’s pretty normal though,” Chouza sighs, “I never could get through to that boy.”

Gently Gai casually caring about Kakashi’s well-being is my entire reason for living, speaking of which if someone wants to come be my Gai that’d be really fucking nice because us Kakashi’s don’t do too well on our own

He hesitates, but says, "Not that I do not find your newfound mentorship to be a most youthful endeavor, but -"

"I don't know," Kakashi interrupts his friend, "I met her while she was taking her genin exam and she, I don't know, adopted me or something. She just keeps showing up."

Gai nods thoughtfully, "Stubbornness is a useful skill to have when trying to cultivate a friendship with you." Kakashi elbows the other man, but doesn't protest besides that. "She's a good cook."

And this one because I love it when people Get It, ya’know?

That's really why he won't say anything, why he won't reveal that the Kyuubi's container and the fourth Hokage's child is still alive: they already killed him once. Naruto and Shikamaru are the same age, they would have been in the same class, and the idea that anyone could want to harm his innocent, precious son makes his blood boil

And this one, for accuracy

"This sounds like a most youthful endeavor. I will bring Anko! She will fan the flames of youth in our young Konoha blossom!"

Both Itachi and Kakashi look at Gai, horrified. "Please don't," Itachi says weakly, like he knows it'll fall on deaf ears but he has to try anyway.

"Don't worry," Gai attempts to assure them, going into his Good Guy pose, "They will produce youthful flames of feminine excellence!"

"They're going to burn down Konoha," Kakashi says flatly.

Gai's hair and teeth sparkle in the sunlight, and he doesn't attempt to deny it.

Another important one

"The world is a terrible place," she says, and she has to swallow before she speaks again, "and it's full of terrible people. But I don't have to be one of them."

I love that Natsu-chan has great balance, this is my number one favorite character trope, and I wish more people would write it

She bends down to look at him upside down, and Itachi can feel that she's not using chakra to stick onto him, and sometimes her balance just isn't logical.

I just love the idea of tiny genius Naruto, and I love that Natsu-chan is a seal master at like, fucking seven and a half lol

Itachi knows it's actually far more complicated than that, but just as he does not tell her minutia of the past shinobi wars in their history lessons, she does not overcomplicate her explanations of sealing. Usually he's grateful for that, but when she appears to break every known law to sealing and chakra, he's not.

"That's," he blinks and he's not going to tell her it's impossible because it clearly isn't, "new," he settles on.

A mood honestly

Inoichi now feels the urge to bang his head against the table top, because 'a huge pain' to Natsu is 'literally impossible' to everyone else.

Another mood honestly

Inoichi watches his former genin dig in with resignation. “When are you guys going to start picking up the tab? Feeding you all isn’t cheap you know.”

Hana swallows her mouthful, “Sensei, I am but a lone healer’s apprentice –“

“I have been a chunin less than a month,” Kabuto pouts, wounded, “and already you seek to profit-“

“Do you have any idea how much sealing paper and ink costs?” Natsu demands.

“Okay, okay,” Inoichi grumbles, but it’s not very effective considering he’s smiling, “I take it back, jeez.”

Okay so, since this is a 100k+ word fic, I’ve been doing this thing lately literally just now on this fic review where I only feature quotes from the first chapter (Depending on length.) but, I’m making an exception because I’ve never seen these three characters and my thoughts on them summed up so well by someone I don’t know which is to say anyone, no one I know cares about my interests really lol

"Maybe a little," he admits grudgingly, "Sakura's really smart, but she acts dumb for some reason. And her endurance is really bad. She probably would have been failed on that alone if she didn't have such good aim with shuriken. And Sasuke's good at like, everything, I still don't get why he didn't graduate earlier. He's just so-" Kiba rubs his hand over his face.

"So what?" Hana prompts, even though she's heard this particular complaint before.

"Sad," the genin sighs, "He's miserable all the time, and he works hard and if you yell at him for long enough he'll work with you, but - crap, I don't know. He's got this really great poker face so you think he's just a big jerk, but I can smell his emotions, the big idiot, and he's just this sad lonely kid who won't listen to anyone."

Hana hums, because if she opens her mouth she'll probably start cursing the Hokage and his dumb rules and his dumb ideas, and that is not the type of thing that leads to a long life.

Just one last quote because dudes, guys, pals, friends of mine it’s important and you should all stop and read it.

“Thanks for being cool with – everything. I’m really happy you’re not mad at me for not being honest with you.”

“You are my friend,” Gaara says warmly, “and you have always been honest about that.”

Words & Chapter(s): 136,306 words of greatness, and 6 full chapters of nicely done completion

Summary: When Naruto is five, he's gutted by a drunken civilian and presumed dead.

Six months later a girl with ash pale hair and dark blue eyes enters the Academy.

(Guys I swear on my cool as fuck username, and all around internet personality as practically satan and probably Lucifer and whatnot that nobody we like stays dead or severely injured)

Score: 13, this is one of my favorites for a reason, this is actually my second technically third time rereading this in as many weeks

Pairing(s): Uchiha Sasuke/Uzumaki Naruto Hatake Kakashi/Umino Iruka, background Haku/Zabuza, but don’t worry anything you’re thinking of is addressed quite nicely in the fic ultra background but still there’s a lot of relationships and I’m not going to tag them all

Warning(s): Naruto technically dies more than once because this is Naruto we’re talking about but they also technically don’t??? You gotta read it, but basically temporary character death, only the bad guys stay dead in this one.

Nobody knows that Naru-chan lived so there’s that angst for you, however, to be fair it’s not like this whole story is just characters mourning and crying and whatnot, at this point it’s mostly just passing thoughts and memories which, again, to be fair, does almost feel worse at times... Huh, regardless it’s not overly angsty

Kakashi is adopted whether he likes it or not by Natsu-chan, we love both of our emotionally fucked over fair-haired ninja in this house so you won’t have to worry about that sorta fic coming outta nowhere from me BTW... but anyways, Kakashi freaks out a bit, much like the abused dog he always reminds me of, but Natsu is the sweetest and most gentle, yet forceful person he could’ve possibly caught the attention of. (This is canon)

The Akatsuki are still bad, BUT ITACHI ISN’T technically SO WHO FUCKING CARES!!!! (The Massacre still happens tho...)

Mentions of The Flower District and what that implies, and also things a Kunoichi might definitely do

Oh my fucking god the Hyuga... Who would willingly do something so horrible as that? Of all the things... Warning for... The Hyuga branch family situation, it’s dealt with nearly as soon as we are informed but, gods, my blood ran cold, and my face whited out, my sister thought someone had died when she saw my face haha,,, who the fuck does this? And do they die? In canon I mean? I think I only watched up to the chunin exams or Pein’s attack, I can’t remember which tho...

Natsu cries because people are nice to her sometimes. And honestly that’s fair, I burst into to tears once because I imagined someone kissing my forehead softly so, Natsu is completely valid... Sidenote, I’m touch-starved and have no cure for this beyond younger siblings and my cat because I don’t have the ability to ask my mom for a hug without literally gross sobbing and I have A Thing about embarrassment sooooo... yeah if anyone has some therapy justu for me that’d be nice

Mentions of Gross Men that apparently want to have Natsu’s increasingly growing collection of the absolute most dangerous people she can befriend pay them a visit. And by that, I mean an old fuckwit has the gall to leer at a TEN-YEAR-OLD and a FUCKING THIRTEEN-YEAR-OLD!!!!!! Ugh, I hate those kinds of pathetic worms.

On that note, there is technically underaged things going on, but they are also Ninja soooo???? They’ve killed people and are technically in their version of an army, and by the laws of their lands they’re all adults, actually I’m pretty sure by shinobi life expectancy Kakashi is middle-aged, Inoichi is a senior citizen, and Hiruzen is a walking corpse tbh

Alcoholism??? I don’t really think it is but I’m not sure, but some characters do drink often, and usually when stressed courtesy of Natsu and co. but still... I don’t actually know if it is because it doesn’t actually happen much, more like every few weeks/months

Mentions of past sexual assault, and attempted past sexual assault, neither happen in fic or to any of our main characters, the experiences are not graphic though they do talk about it in chapter five, it’s not to graphically described.

Also, a bunch of off-screen lemon

A Thing (That I copy-pasted from the author so that all of you will see it and not say a single word against it.): If you thought Natsu was too mature for her age - she has seen and been through some really horrible shit. But also: my cousin has, since he was like 4, hung out with kids that were about 4 years older than him because those were the kids that were in his neighborhood or whatever. Point being, even after he started school, his main group of friends was consistently older than him. He very quickly adapted to that, and to this day (he's 12) hangs out with that same group, and considers children his own age 'kids' because he adapted to the behavior of the group he was surrounded with. I hardly believe Natsu would be any different.

And also

4. Quick little note because some people mentioned liking my portrayal of the Sandaime. I base his decisions/motivations (and Itachi and Danzo's to a certain extent) around this quote by Clementine von Radics: "It is so hard to live half monster, to hurt everything you love by trying to protect it wrong."

Pros: Watching Natsu just casually disregard the idea of gender with little to no thought is the greatest thing anyone will ever experience beyond, I dunno, the party we’re all gonna collectively throw when soggy Cheeto dies (I still haven’t decided which song we should make chart number one when that happens)

Given that I’ve technically read this three times you should already know the writing is fucking amazing, like, whoa, mind blown type of amazing, like, wow, so good, I usually hate rereading something I’ve read before, and especially so soon after the fact but geez Louis is this fic amazing

Natsu is just as easy to fall in love with as Naruto, and they are still the same people with slightly different personalities as is to be realistically expected with a situation like Naru’s was.

Also, GENDERFLUID REPRESENTATION DONE FUCKING AMAZINGLY IS ALWAYS A PLUS!!!!!!!

The author manages to convey a very realistic genderfluid character in an incredibly believable manner, while also still keeping Natsu/Naruto themself. They’re still the Naruto that we knew and loved, but they’re different too, as is to be expected. when Natsu is a girl no-one stumbles, she is a girl without a doubt, even the author doesn’t trip up on societal expectations, and when Naruto is a boy there is next to immediate acceptance of this fact with absolutely zero (0) Zero bullshit from transphobes, which, as a genderfluid person myself, is always fucking nice to see. You’ll have to read it to know more though.

Natsu running around creating seals is honestly the greatest thing ever, and the end scene with the village made me cry a lil bit, and dammit this fic is so fucking good!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So, there’s a scene, where Natsu heals Kakashi, and the way the author handled explaining the intimate not sexual relationship between two of my favorite characters ever is just, so subtly beautiful, the sibling-bond these two have is beautiful, and a part of me wants to cry sometimes when I read it, and usually do cry a little when I get to this scene, and only partially because of what happened directly before it.

I love the way everybody just gets up and moves past their trauma and just decides to politely ignore it, oh they still have it, they still deal with it, but they care, and they are careful about it, and even though it hurts them like a knife-wound to the kidney in slow-motion they still get back up and keep fucking going. That’s hella admirable and I can respect that, I can respect even more that they slowly but surely let themselves heal as time moves on. This fic is beautiful on so many different levels but it is this one perhaps, that is the most magnificent. Perhaps.

Sasuke is adorable and depressing and adorable and I love it. And Ino is still a bad bitch but she’s a kid so we only see it like a handful of times in the first two chapters. The Akimichi/Yamanaka/Nara are all great, and I occasionally pity Inionchicause like, he’s putting up with a well-informed seal genius that’s still hyper, a slightly frightening medic-kunoichi with giant dogs, another slightly more frightening medic-nin who isn’t the greatest fighter but damn can he be intimidating and also really good at pointing out “Certain Things” while judging you about them which, honestly, is my greatest pastime. Itachi is so sweet and then so tragic oh my gods, and Natsu never even considers giving up on him. Kakashi is so sweet, and he slowly becomes less of a beaten dog as time goes on and I just love all of these characters.

Except for Hiruzen. Well, no, I still love this particular incarnation of Hiruzen, for all that he’s got one hell of a pathetically small backbone, I get why he does shit. But that doesn’t make me happy. Still, he’s better than dumbledouchebag. Granted that’s not difficult, and you might have to actively put an effort in to be as bad as that guy, but still. Plus, his hearts in the right place, and he’s less about the greater good then... certain disgraces to teaching and being in charge of a large group of people... Hiruzen is actually kinda sweet and admits he has issues and actually has an excuse that’s understandable for the shit that he pulls which is great, if sadly uncommon.

Anyways, Sakura is terrifying, and I remembered why I had a crush on her. She’s so badass, also, she ends up Princess Mononoke basically which, honestly, is fucking great, and the best thing we could’ve asked for, I love all of these characters so much!!!

Aesthetic: It reminds me off beefy stew (We don’t eat beef, so we used vegan soy beef stuff instead, and it was just as good.) it reminds me of the warmth, and friendship, and home that I felt after my mom and I make dinner together with nothing but a little music on and jokes passing back and forth between us. It reminds me of scraping my knee and having my friends help me to their mom, it reminds me of loyalty and compassion. It reminds me of dancing outside at night, alone in the forest with nothing but the moon for company and wind for music. It reminds me of the first time I realized that I could love someone despite their gender and that I should despite mine. It reminds me of finely spun handmade lace, and all it’s delicate while also reminding me of the sturdiest of steels, it reminds me of so much. It reminds me of acceptance, and understanding, and so much more. If I were to say what food and drink it reminds me of, I’d say chicken noodle soup, and sweet lavender-lemon tea.

Music Aesthetic: So, I made a playlist while I was reading this the first time around, and instead of a gif or twenty like I would usually prefer to do I’m going to add that playlist. https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLbhXmTSBbAyjk0m1b4BZUp3t0RHL83LDK

But if I were to add a gif or two it’d be these

Because something about this fic reminds me of rainy days with tea and baggy clothes.

Every time Natsu/Naruto decided to fight ever, to be honest.

#sasunaru #naruto x sasuke #Sasuke x Naruto #Satan has great taste in: SasuNaru #kakairu #Satan has great taste in: KakaIru #long fic #Long Read #over 100k #Naruto #It's another Naruto one #sasuke #fem!naruto #sorta #genderfluid!naruto #give it a chance #trust me #fic rec

333 notes · View notes

gotbts7fics · 5 years ago

Text

Positive | Four |

Three | May to June 2017 | Five |

The month began with you frantically arranging all the tasks you needed to accomplish. Jaebum had messaged you several times, each one left unanswered. You assumed he was just shaking his head at your stubbornness, not really assuming anything was wrong. That he would come home and make sure everything went back to normal. Except you wouldn’t be there when he came home. It was heartless, you knew it but you couldn’t figure out what else to do at this point. You had hidden a pregnancy, broken your own heart and were about to leave a country you called home for over three years.

“You should at least write him a letter. You’re going to break his heart anyways. At least give the dude closure so he can move on from your pathetic ass” Bree snorted through the screen. It was your weekly skype date with the two women who you loved more than anything. However, the conversation was not going in a positive direction as neither of them pleased with your actions and justifications at the moment.

“I also think you need to write him a letter, if not, text. SOMETHING! This is insane you just leaving him without thinking of the bigger picture.” Kassie stated as a matter of fact.

“Well what do you want me to do. ‘Hey Babe, I’m sorry, but I am kinda eighteen weeks pregnant. Sorry for hiding almost half a pregnancy….SURPRISE!’ Like really?” You bit out, face contorting in annoyance. It was the same conversation lately. Everyone was upset with your decision. They couldn’t believe you were actually going to hide this baby and run away.

“Well whose fault is that!” Kassie retorted with just as much annoyance. You huffed out a response to her.

“Ladies enough. Listen, we love and support you no matter what. We just feel like this was not the best way to handle the situation, but we support you. We just know how much shit you’ve been through and you deserve the world babe.” Bree insisted while looking intently at her screen.

“I love you both. I know the decision I made is selfish, but I didn’t know what to do…” You mumbled looking down to your lap, tears threatening to spill over any minute. These pregnancy hormones were killing you. “Hey, listen, I’m sorry. We got you. Everything will work out eventually. I promise” Kassie assured.

“thank you…” You replied. After several more minutes of chit chatting the girls said their goodbyes, having to get ready for work, and you needing to get ready for bed. Tomorrow you had another ultrasound appointment, and were excited to finally find out what the gender of the baby was. As if they knew you were thinking about them, the little human sent out a very hard kick. “Well, hello to you too, little bean.” You whispered rubbing your belly. You definitely were starting to show now, however still able to hide the small round belly with sweaters. Sighing, you stood up from your position and headed to bed. It was going to be a long day tomorrow.

The following morning after dropping Jaidyn off to school, you made your way to the clinic for your eighteen week check up. The clinic was busy on this particular morning, with many moms to be already in the waiting room. Upon registering for your appointment, you took a seat in front of the window, figuring to pass time you can watch people walking by as you read over different pamphlets on pregnancy and the first few months after birth. It was a painfully long 45 minutes with a full bladder, before you were finally called in by a nurse to a room.

The technician followed her in and began the vigorous amount of tests and scans of your uterus and the human inside. As the technician swirled the wand around your belly, you watched as the little human you had created twisted and turned on the screen. You were already hopelessly in love with this tiny being.

“Alright Ms Y/L/N, your baby is developing perfectly, everything looks healthy and on tract. Would you like to know the gender of your baby?” The technician asked as she rolled the wand around your stomach for a better view. “Yes please, if it is easy to tell” You replied with a wide smile on your face. The technician brought the ultrasound in between the baby’s legs. “Do you see?” She asked with a smile.

“Yes, yes I do” You smiled, as tears slowly fell down your face. You were looking at the newest member of your little family. After receiving the ultrasound pictures, you packed your things and headed to work. You only had a few more days until the end of your contract, which was a bitter sweet reality. You clutched the picture of your beautiful baby, thinking about how this tiny human was about to make your life so much sweeter.

Before you could even fathom it, you were days away from heading home. May went by seemingly fast after your last medical appointment, a combination of finishing work, and packing your life away and were getting ready to ship your belongings home, had left little time to dwell on the reality around you. You had the hard conversation with Jaidyn that you two would be moving home to Canada. Jaidyn was not happy, she had a life in Seoul that she loved, and moving home was not “a good choice” in her words. However, after much persuasion, you had convinced her that she was going to be happy back home, in your little town with her grandparents and friends. JB had continued to message you, but you refused to answer any of them. His last text had been almost a week prior, and as you reread it, your heart was breaking. You were causing him so much pain.

[3:16pm] Jaebum: Look, I am angry. You’re being a selfish frigging brat. I get it, you’re upset but to be so immature that you can’t even respond. I am trying here, but I will only give you so much. I need to think about myself too. You’re hurting me. I want nothing more than to hold you and love you, but you can’t even give me a text back. I miss my daughter and you won’t even send me pictures or answer the phone. You’re just… Wow… really. We’re heading to Thailand from Japan. I’m sorry, I wish I could see you sooner. I’ll be back in Korea on June 5th. So please baby, let’s talk this out. I hate this shit. I love you. I’ll be waiting.

“He’s returning to Seoul on the day I leave.” You said into the receiver.

“And you’re really not telling him anything?” The male on the other line asked.

“No, I’m not.”

“What’s so bad about this guy, that after what… three years, you can’t even be honest with him?”

“Nothing is wrong with him, He is perfect. But I won’t wreck his career. I can’t do that.”

“I don’t understand, you’re putting this guy ahead of you and his child… what type of man… You know what… whatever. I don’t understand. I just know that this guy doesn’t deserve you if you think that his career is worth more than this child. When you come home, you will have me to support you” Owen said, he was having a very difficult time with you being dishonest, but he was your best friend, and he would be there to pick up all the pieces when you came home.

“Thank you, I know you don’t get it. I know it sounds crazy and after everything you’ve been through… I just love him so much I need him to succeed” You were toying with your hands now, anxiety getting the best of you.

“Okay, I love you and because I love you, I will support your decision. I am also selfish because I want my niece and you home.”

“Will you pick me up in Toronto? I know you hate the city….”

“Of course. I wouldn’t miss this homecoming for the world.”

“OK, I’ll talk to you later. I am going to get some packing done. I can’t believe I’m moving home.”

“Me neither, I was against you abandoning me in the beginning anyways so I am excited to have you back, you jerk” He said right before he ended the call. You smiled to yourself, it was a little bit easier to go home to him. The man who had been your best friend since you were sixteen. The man who has been there non stop as the stellar uncle to your kid when her own biological father was a flop. You knew without a doubt he would be just as amazing with this new baby as he was with your first born. You went back to packing the apartment after that phone call. Time was running out in Seoul.

“Mom, can we get Starbucks?” Jaidyn asked as she wheeled her suitcase along the corridor to your designated gate. Why was this airport so big? You thought to yourself. You had popped in your opinion now, enough that if people knew you, they would be questioning your rounder belly. Still today, a very hot day, you wore a hoodie to hide the not so little bean growing rapidly in your tummy.

“Sure, hey… I’m going to get us a chair over there, you go right a head and get in line, can you see me?” Jaidyn nodded after your question.

“Good, you know what I like, get us both a treat baby” You said with a smile on your face. You were having cramps today and were anxious about flying. Your nerves intensified when you checked the flight schedule and noticed there was a huge possibility that Jaebum may arrive to Incheon prior to you actually being on the plane now due to a delay. You dreaded seeing him. Especially since you literally only texted him an hour before, well aware that he was in the sky and he wouldn’t get it until he landed. You knew what you had done was unbelievably heartless, yet you refused to take it back. Your phone chimed to notify you of a text message from your mom, wishing you a safe journey home. With your phone open, you went to the conversation you had with JB. Countless unanswered messages from him where he declared his love for you, for Jaidyn, telling you how he was miserable with you ignoring him. It all came down to your last message to him.

[1:15pm] You: I’m sorry. I’m moving home to Canada today.

It was a simple, yet devastating text message. The type the punches you in the gut and leaves you kneeled over and sobbing. And now you were silently praying that your flight wouldn’t hit a further delay and overlap the time you and him would both be at this airport, because if you saw him, if he begged, you would fall into his arms and tell him everything. If he asked you to stay, you would. You would ruin him.

“Mom, is Appa going to meet us here, I miss him so much. Will he at least say goodbye to me?” Jaidyn asked as she returned and placed a drink in front of you, drawing you out of your thoughts. Her seven year old self was asking so many questions lately. You were avoiding them at all cost until you arrived in Canada. You just didn’t want her to know about this baby yet, or know you had ended it with the man she saw as her dad. It was weighing heavily on you, and your sanity was slowly unravelling.

“No baby, he’s not home from Thailand yet. We will talk to him once we are home in Canada okay?” You answered, looking down at your drink. You had become a liar. Constantly avoiding the issues at hand to try and keep the peace within.

“Less than twenty minutes until we board the plane love, are you excited to see Uncle Owen and Gramma and Grampa” Asking to distract her.

“Oh yeah! Uncle Owen is picking us up!!! I can’t wait to see him!!!” She exclaimed as she took a sip of her drink. You guys sat in silence for a bit, just waiting for the agents to call boarding. That’s when you heard the screaming. Your breath hitched in your throat and you tried to make yourself small. You knew all to well those types of screams. Fans screaming. Oh Fuck, you thought. Taking deep breaths to prevent yourself from having a panic attack, praying it was some other idol group walking through the airport, and not the man you were desperately trying to avoid.

“Maman, who is that? Why are they screaming?” Jaidyn looked around from her chair. “I don’t know sweetie, lets not stare.” You replied, also while trying to be discreet as you looked around. Please, please, please.... You silently prayed. Ding. Your cellphone went off. Pulling it out of your pocket cautiously, like a bomb that could explode any minute, you opened to your messages.

[3:55pm] Jaebum: Are you in the airport?

[3:56pm] Jaebum: Please baby, tell me you’re still here.

[3:56pm] Jaebum: Baby, please. At least let me say goodbye to Jaidyn.

You took a deep breath, you knew he could see you had read the messages. You struggled with yourself. The internal battle waging on.

[3:57pm] Jaebum: Answer me. I will fucking find you in this airport so help me god!

[3:58pm] You: I’m sorry, I truly am. But I don’t think it’s best to see each other. Please think of your fans

His reply was instant.

“Good Afternoon Ladies and Gentleman, we are now ready to board Air Canada flight AC062 destination to Toronto. We kindly ask you have your photo ID ready and locate the zone number on the top of your boarding card. We will be boarding zone one momentarily” You exhaled as you heard your flight being called for boarding. This was it, you were finally leaving.

[3:58pm] Jaebum: I will fucking tell the world right now about you, I will do whatever I need to do to make sure you don’t leave me. Please baby, don’t leave me. I need you, I need Jaidyn. DO NOT GET ON THAT PLANE!

Your phone started buzzing, JB was calling you. You quickly rejected the phone call. You didn’t know how much willpower you had to keep yourself from answering until you were on that plane, seated and buckled in. JB was frantic at this point, you had ignored his phone calls, them going straight to voicemail. He had been so elated to see you had finally messaged him back after weeks of ignoring him. Only his happiness had been crushed when he read your message. He didn’t think you were serious about breaking up, he figured he could fix this like he always did. You were stubborn and bold, but you loved him. He couldn’t believe you were actually ending it, and moving across the world. Why, what had he honestly done to make you this unhappy to make you move back to Canada. You loved Korea, Jaidyn loved Korea. He was trying to engage you in what little conversation he could, buying himself enough time to find you. You were in the airport, a quick search of flights shown there was only one to Canada, which meant if he could get to that gate he could find you, and hold you. Hell. he was pretty sure he would tackle you to the ground at this point and not let you board that plane, not caring who witnessed it. He hadn’t even had time to let anyone know what was happening. He had just showed his phone to Jinyoung and prayed he understood. Jinyoung had stared at him with wide eyes and then told him to go, pulling out his own, JB assumed, to message the others. He was running now. Surprisingly he had managed to get away from the fans who had been waiting for them. Trying his best to get to you, where ever you were in this godforsaken airport. DING! Please baby, please he thought.

[4:03pm] You: I’m sorry JB. Goodbye.

JB stopped in his tracks doubled over, gasping for air. No. He couldn’t stop himself, staring at your text message, he began to cry.

You were anxiously in line, desperate to get on that plane, looking around cautiously. If he saw you, if he found you, it was game over. What felt like forever you approached the agent, handing her the passports and boarding passes to scan. You were just about to walk through the doors when you caught the eye of someone. Jinyoung was standing just off to the side, staring at you with wide teary eyes gasping for air, looking like he wanted to yell at you. You shook your head not even bothering to try and hide your tears falling. Ushering Jaidyn away and onto the plane. Jinyoung’s heart broke for his friend, for the loss of you and Jaidyn.

You watched as Korea disappeared before your eyes from your tiny window. Jaidyn had fallen asleep the moment the engines turned on leaving you in a self loathing, pity party. You left the only man who had shown you what love really was, because you couldn’t be honest with him. You left behind your home and your life our of fear and selfishness. You were a terrible person, well, that’s what you were telling yourself until you felt a swift kick in your bladder and a head falling onto your shoulder. You were a mother, and even if it was selfish, you were going to protect the three people you loved the most. You hoped one day the people you loved would understand the choices you made

. JB found his way back to his members after what seemed like forever after watching your plane take off, feeling numb to the pain that was in his heart. The members just looked at him cautiously, knowing that this loss would forever change him, would change them. You had become family, they had helped raise that little girl of yours. There was confusion and anger, unanswered questions that they needed clarified. This wasn’t you. You loved them all, you loved JB with your whole being. Something was wrong.

“Hyung, I am so sorry!” Jinyoung gasped, rushing forward and wrapping his arms around JB.

“I couldn’t find them, I couldn’t find them before she left.” JB buried his face into Jinyoung’s shoulder.

“I tried to stop her Hyung, but I was to late. I am so sorry, she was walking on to the plane when I finally found her” Jinyoung said, his own tears threatening to fall. “It’s not your fault. It’s mine. I asked so much of her, she tried to tell me how unhappy she was. She just wanted a normal life. I ruined everything” JB mumbled, tears still falling.

“Let’s go home and just try to figure out what to do next. We will get her back Hyung. There is no way she is gone” Jackson piped in. All JB could do was stay positive he would find you again.

#positive #got7 #got7 x reader #got7 pregnancy au #jb x reader #jaebum x reader #jaebum

2 notes · View notes

i-writeandread-blog · 5 years ago

Text

A Portrait of a Tortured You and I - Chapter 1

Okay, so I know I said Wonderland would be back, and it will be... I promise, but I sat down to write tonight and this is what came out. So sometimes the truth is stranger than fiction. This new story is an amalgamation of truth and fiction. Many elements in this are from real life events. A writer writes what they know. So, this is really hard for me to share. I almost didn’t want to. I won’t say what parts are real or aren’t. It doesn’t matter. Just be gentle with my new child is all I ask. Thanks to anyone who reads. This is Chapter 1.

I was standing on the shore waiting for my time to board the ferry to an island- that for the next three days would be known affectionately as Mars Island. I had been through the worst eight months of my life and had shocked myself that I managed to pull off this trip. First, because financially, I was a mess. Second, because I was now terrified everyday. And third, because some of the Echelon had been unkind to me, during some of my darkest times.

Eight months prior, I was happy. Not the happiest I've ever been, but I was doing well. I had always battled depression but it was at bay, even though I had had a falling out with my sisters. This falling out forced me to need to uproot my life and leave my beloved California for the east coast where majority of my family lived. Without my sisters as my roommates, I couldn't afford to stay in Cali, as much as it pained me to admit. Sure, I could have moved out and tried to find a roommate on Craigslist, but I was too cautious and I was barely making ends meet with the two roommates I had. It seemed easier at the time to move back "home" with my tail between my legs. Of course, I did it at the worst possible time. A huge hurricane was barreling through the Atlantic Ocean headed straight for us. I arrived the night before all hell broke loose.

Nevertheless, we managed to soldier on. The house flooded, we had to stay at a temporary shelter, but we made it through. Still, the depression wasn't rearing it's ugly head. I was desperately trying to find a job, because there wasn't much out there in a rural southern coastal town. I had a career, but I left it to pursue writing. I was hell bent on writing or nothing at all. Somehow that translated into me getting a job as a waitress. So much for the "nothing at all." I have no idea what I was thinking, to be honest. I guess I felt like it would give me free time to continue to write. It didn't.

I was lonely, my friends were all married with kids and I was stuck living with my parents. Not to mention the dating scene here was as abysmal as the job market. I started working at a local diner, I knew almost everyone who came in, the tips were okay. What wasn't okay was the questions I got.

"What are you doing back here?"

— "long story..."

"Weren't you working at a law office?"

— "no, I was a court stenographer."

"Where's your husband?"

— "dunno, but if you find him, can you point him in my direction?"

And my personal favorite was,

"Are you having a mid life crisis? You're much too young and pretty for that."

— "uhh, thanks?"

So instead of working on my novel, or even reading somebody else's, I poured myself into watching documentaries. My love of true crime led me to watching one about a wrongfully convicted murderer. I was appalled that the justice system had failed yet again. I saw it too often when I was working in the courtroom. But unlike when I was working, I actually could have a voice now. I started going on these different blogs looking for ways to help people who had been hurt by the legal system. By early November, I had met a guy who shared my passion. I wasn't actually helping anyone, so much as just talking about the different cases and once I met Andrew, I didn't go on the blogs anymore. I became enthralled with him. Talking to him anytime, I wasn't at the diner.

I truly thought that Andrew would be the guy I had been waiting for. The man of my dreams. But on December 26th, out of nowhere, he stopped taking my calls. At first, I was worried. Then worry turned to anger, and anger turned to depression. I never did find out what happened. But, I do know he is alive and well, because he accidentally texted me one morning in January. It was meant for his dad. He didn't text again.

This was the start of my year. It wasn't looking so good so far, for 2019. Worse came to worse when I had to work a double on the day after Valentines Day. Sylvie- the other waitress, myself, and Dan- the cook were discussing going out to a bar, but because I was so tired, I ultimately declined. I ended up regretting my decision when they left and I was still fumbling for my keys. Usually, we all left at the same time. It just wasn't my night. Three rowdy teenagers who had been kicked out of the diner earlier for being too obnoxious came out from the shadows, grabbing me and dragging me to the back of the diner. I fought hard, grabbing and pulling at whatever, I could. It was for naught. They punched and kicked me over and over, spit in my face, tore my uniform half off, and then left me there bleeding and unconscious.

My parents had expected me home and sat around worrying when I hadn't at least called to say I would be late. My dad decided after an hour to go looking for me. He pulled up to the diner, saw my car and yelled for me. I whimpered. He followed the pathetic sounds to the back loading area where he found me. The police investigated, but I couldn't remember anything about my attackers. The diner didn't have any surveillance footage and all anyone remembered was they looked like typical kids. They left no DNA evidence behind. I had become a true crime victim.

A month prior, I had thrown caution to the wind and purchased this ticket to the island. I was reeling from the "break up," if you could even call it that and decided, I could make it work financially, as I had a retirement plan I could cash out. Now, after the attack, I was to be out of work for an indefinite amount of time. I had some nerve damage and a punctured lung from a broken rib. I didn't know how I was going to pay any of the hospital bills as I didn't have any insurance. I decided to reach out to the people, I believed were more my family than my actual blood. The Echelon. My brothers and sisters in Mars.

I went onto Vyrt, as some of us still chatted on there and I nervously typed the following: hey guys, haven't been on in a few weeks. Have been missing you all. Several people responded with hellos and where have ya beens. Then, I admitted to them what had happened: well, it's been tough. I was attacked. Left for dead, ya know... the usual. My sense of humor was my downfall here. Many people thought I was joking, but I eventually admitted it was all true and said I was sorry for making it seem so lighthearted. I told everyone how rough things were and that I had sadly cancelled my trip to Croatia. I was lucky, because Adventures in Wonderland refunded me due to my circumstances. Then out of the blue, someone I loved and respected, Natalie, typed: she's so full of shit guys, she just wants sympathy because she's living such a pathetic life. I was stunned. Never once, had I ever went into Vyrt looking for a pity party, and never had I ever been mean or rude towards her. She continued: I bet she never even booked mars island. AiW doesn't do refunds ever! I don't know, guys. She wasn't done, but at this point no one had come to my defense, so she rattled on: I bet she's trying to get Jared's attention. Maybe she thinks he will allow her to come to the island as his guest. I was mortified. I quickly logged out and laid sobbing on the hospital bed. I had no one to turn to after all.

The next day, I had many messages from various Echelon. Some were kind, others were nasty. I decided to just leave the Mars "fandom" behind and try to pick up the mess that was my life. That was until, I noticed an email notification from Shayla. I at first thought it was a form letter email, since AiW had sent out several when they first were promoting the island. But curiosity got the better of me and I clicked on it.

Shayla McGhee

To: Catherine Tyrell

Hi Catherine!

I wanted to let you know that someone decided to pay the remainder of the balance for your Mars Island package. Is it okay for us to process their payment? We haven't issued your refund of the first payment yet, is this also okay? We understand if the circumstances surrounding your reason to cancel will keep you from attending, but maybe you can still join us? Let me know!

Best

Shay

I read and reread the email about a dozen times. Surprised would be an understatement. I couldn't fathom who would have done this for me. As far as I could tell the entirety of the Mars fan base hated me. I pressed the call button and waited for my nurse to saunter in.

"Well look who has a huge smile on her face! What do you need, honey?" She asked.

"Can you ask the doctor to come see me. I need to ask him a question about my recovery process." I wanted to know if it was even remotely feasible for me to travel halfway across the globe in a matter of six months time.

"Sure, dear. I'll see if I can find him doing his rounds. Need anything else?" I shook my head and she left the room.

A few long hours later, I had my answer. If I followed all instructions, I'd be out of the hospital in a couple of weeks and I shouldn't take too long to recover physically. I was warned that I had to follow all the rules or I may not recover in time. I believed in myself and sent a reply back saying, I would be making it to the island without hesitation. I was on cloud nine. If only I knew then what I know now. My recovery wasn't just going to be physical.

That night the nightmares started. The panic attacks started the next day. The need to not be left alone started a week later. I was an emotional wreck. I don't even know what triggered it. My therapist says, "The human brain is a tricky one. Sometimes it takes time for trauma to sink in." I was diagnosed with severe PTSD, depression, anxiety, etc. The depression I was used to, the constantly being afraid, I wasn't.

I wanted to be normal again, but no matter what I did, I was always in a state of alert. I began checking the locks on the doors many times before I was satisfied they were truly locked. I would jump at the slightest sound. I'd burst into tears randomly. I couldn't watch TV because everything had violence. Even cartoons were getting bad. I was miserable, only leaving the house for doctor appointments. I was a shell of my former self.

The time for the island got closer and closer, but I was in no position to travel. I was almost completely agoraphobic. One day, my mother who didn't necessarily want me to travel alone came in to my room, where I was still sleeping at noon. "Okay, enough is enough! Get up! I know you're sad, I know you're scared, but you aren't doing anything the therapist has suggested you do. You need to fight this head on. No stop pulling the blankets over your head! Wake up!" I grumbled and sat up, yelling. "Can you NOT, Mother! I don't need your bullshit, right now." As soon as I said the words I felt sick. I was never one to treat my parents with disrespect. I hated who I had become. Fortunately, my mother took it in stride. "Catherine Leeann Tyrell, I'm only going to say this once, you ever talk to me like that again and there will most certainly be hell to pay. This is your one get out of jail free card. I'm going to let it slide because I know you are terrified. But you can't live like this anymore. Bad things happen all the time. They happen to everyone. You are not the first person to have this happen to. As special as you are, you're NOT that special, that you'd be the one and only person to be attacked. Now, some nice person did you a favor and paid for you to have a wonderful experience. Are you going to let their money go down the drain because you can't be bothered to at least try to live again?"

My mother's monologue shook me to the core. She was right. I needed to confront this head on. She then dropped a letter on the bed and walked out. There was no name or any sender information. My mother had already opened it, no doubt to protect me in case it were something bad. I sat there staring at the contents. Laying in my lap was a cashiers check in the amount of $3,000 and a note. It simply said: "for your travel arrangements to Croatia."

#thirty seconds to mars #30 seconds to mars #jared leto #campmars #marsisland #jared leto fiction #jared leto fic #jared leto fan fiction #jared leto fanfics #jared leto fanfic #jared leto fanfiction #echelon

25 notes · View notes

ugh-supersoldiers · 7 years ago

Text

Christmas, Revisited.

MASTERLIST

Characters: Bucky x reader

Summary: You and Bucky had split up the previous holiday season after an argument about him being away for Christmas. Now a year later, Bucky’s flight home gets canceled on Christmas Eve after a mission. The hotels are all full, and there’s no where to go, except for the one person he knows who lives in town, the one person who likely wants to see him least in the world - you.

Warnings: A touch of angst, fluffy ending though, swearing

Words: 3905

A/N: This is for @jurassicbarnes writing challenge (whose Birthday is on Christmas so please everyone send her some Birthday love when the time comes xoxo)

It had been a bad day for Bucky Barnes. The Christmas season had, in the past few years, not been overly kind to him. As a kid, he used to love when the temperature would drop and the snow would fall and he could listen to the voices of carolers on the street, but now the cold reminded him of less pleasant memories.

He’d been working a mission, the first one that Steve had let him go solo on. Nothing big, limited physical involvement, he was just supposed to get some information on some guy who did some very bad thing. The usual. And he did it flawlessly, of course. It was a tight squeeze, but Bucky managed to pull it off right on Christmas Eve, but apparently the biggest snow storm that the city had ever seen which meant getting back to the Avengers tower - getting home for Christmas - was not going to happen easily.

“This is just fuckin’ great.” Bucky said, rereading the email on his phone over and over and over again hoping that it might change and say something different. But it didn’t. No matter how many times he read it over, it still regretted to inform him that his flight back home had been cancelled due to the impending storm.

Bucky had actually almost been looking forward to going back to the tower and seeing his team mates again. He hadn’t experienced ‘family’ in a long time, and his was the closest he figured he’d ever get given his past.

He’d been thinking about seeing the no doubt gaudy tree that Tony had set up in the living room, so tall it likely touched the ceiling. Wanda would definitely be baking cookies, and Sam would be attempting - and failing - to decorate them. Natasha would probably be curled up somewhere reading a book. And Steve, well Steve, Bucky guessed, would be trying desperately to wrap each thoughtful gift he’d purchased in the confine of his room, decked out in a holiday sweater.

Bucky pinched the bridge of his nose as he took another sip of the coffee he’d purchased, leaning back into the seat of the coffee shop as the wind howled outside, blowing snow in each direction.

“Fuck.” He mumbled.

What the hell was he supposed to do now?

He messaged Steve, telling him what happened, telling his oldest friend that he wouldn’t make it back for Christmas morning.

Bucky swallowed hard, watching the little delivered appear at the bottom of the blue bubble. He hated texting, he really did, it always felt so impersonal, but what could he do?

He didn’t bother waiting for a reply, he already knew that Steve would say something about not worrying about it, or it wasn’t his fault, or - even worse - maybe next year. Bucky didn’t want a next year, hell he wasn’t even sure if he’d make it to next year without getting killed by God knows who doing God knows what.

He glanced out the window again as he locked his phone, seeing the stark white sheet that had covered the glass.

“Shit.”

Seemingly, when faced with crisis, Bucky Barnes could offer nothing more than cuss words.

His next step was to try and book a hotel, but of course they were full. It was Christmas Eve, how could they not be?

Where in the hell am I supposed to go?

A face instantly popped into his head. One that he knew so well despite it being a year since you’d last spoken, since he’d last seen you. He saw a warm fireplace, fairy lights, mugs of hot chocolate resting on the mantle where stockings hung gingerly.

Bucky shifted uncomfortably in his seat at the thought of last Christmas because it only reminded him of you - and he knew there was no way you’d be willing to take him in for the night after what had fallen apart between the two of you.

He unlocked his phone, absentmindedly scrolling through his contacts until he saw your name, still adorned with several hearts along the contact name, your doing of course, but it still brought a sad smile to his face at the sight.

He clicked your name, and pressed the phone to his ear. He didn’t have another option.

The ringing of the phone must’ve been the worst sound he’d ever heard given the amount of anxiety it caused him.

It rang once, twice, three then four times before he heard a defeating beep, sending him right to your voicemail. He was about to hang up, everything in his body told him to just hand up before he had to hear her voice-

“Hey it’s (Y/N)! Sorry I didn’t pick up, I must be doing something important… or sleeping-”

He heard his own voice cut through.

“Probably sleeping!”

“Shut up, Buck! Anyways, leave me a message and I’ll try and get back to you as soon as I- ouch! Did you just throw a pillow at my head?!”

The beep rang though again, but Bucky’s mouth was too far near the floor to be able to speak. You hadn’t changed your voicemail in over a year. Hearing the sound of your sweet banter made his heart hurt so badly, despite the bitterness he knew he should feel towards you.

Realizing he’d been awkwardly saying nothing whilst leaving you a message, Bucky panicked and hung up. He sighed at his own idiocy.

It had been a stupid fight, a really stupid one. One that could and should have been resolved within an hour of it happening in the first place, but you two never got the chance to repair what had been broken.

“So you’re just going to leave?” You asked him.

Bucky didn’t think he could have his heartbroken so quickly, but the tone of your voice did it in a split second.

“Yes.” He said, a lousy one syllable answer.

He wanted so badly to tell you how much he cared about you and how he wished he didn’t have to, but he couldn’t figure out how. Bucky wasn’t always good with words.

“So the second Steve calls you with a mission, you just abandon everything and go? That’s just how you do it, huh?” You let out a dry laugh from the sofa across from the chair he sat on.

He ran his hands through his hair, tugging on the strands in distress.

“I’m not abandoning you.” He said firmly.

He knew it was wrong from him to be defensive like this, but once again, he didn’t know what else to do.

“Really? What would you call this then?” You challenged him.

“I call it doing my goddamn job, (Y/N).” Bucky said with a sigh.

“The same job that keeps you up all night because of that twisted guilt complex you have? The job that gives you more nightmares then it takes away?” Your angry tone ceased for a moment as you took a breath, then nearly pleaded, “Bucky come on, can you please take a break just this once? It’s Christmas.”

“I’m not going to take a fucking break,” He seethed, “The second I take a break someone out there is gonna get killed because I wasn’t there to save them.”

“Jesus Christ, Bucky! Steve could save them, or Natasha, or Tony or literally anyone else who would be willing to trade off with you on this one occasion!” He could hear in your voice that you were holding back tears.

“No.” He said.

“No? That’s all I get?” You said, your voice sounding so much quieter now, defeated almost.

“I’m going.”

“You won’t even tell me why you won’t try and stay.” You whispered.

Until now he’d been avoiding eye contact with you because he knew he’d break the second that he looked into your eyes. But his curiosity got the better of him, and his eyes darted upwards to see you.

Tears were now spilling from the corners of your eyes, making wet trail marks down your face and onto the blanket that rested on your lap. The hot chocolate you’d made sat on the coffee table in front of you, but it had long gone cold.

“Because I deserve everything this is doing to me.” He said.

A sob racked through you, and Bucky’s heart clenched. Why was he doing this to you? Why couldn’t he just convince himself to sit it out. Steve would understand- everyone would understand why he wanted to stay with you over Christmas.

“No matter how many times people tell you otherwise, you’re always going to believe that, aren’t you?” You asked, looking up at him, barely able to make out his figure through the tears.

Bucky couldn’t say anything. You were right.

You huffed out, standing up and tossing the blanket back on the couch. He didn’t look up at you, he decided to keep his eyes cast down at his feet. He listened to the sound of your footsteps as they went up the stairs, only to come down a minute or two later.

The bag he’d packed appeared at his feet, thrown there by you as you now stood above him.

“Wouldn’t want to forget this.” You sneered, the words getting caught in your throat as you pushed them past the lump that resided there.

“Don’t make me leave like this.” He said, eyes still trained on the bag.

“Like what?” You asked, exasperated.

“Don’t make me leave with you pissed at me.”

“You’re leaving right before Christmas, Bucky, with no set arrival date, how could I not be pissed? For all I know you could be gone for a year!”

“For all you know I could be gone for good!”

That was it, that was the moment he knew he’d gone too far.

All you ever did was worry about him when he was away. Every time he walked back through that door after a mission, you cried tears of joy and relief. Every waking hour when he wasn’t safe was spent in worry and anxiety, and for him to insinuate that he might not come home at all this time was a knife to the heart.

“You really know where to poke the sharp stick don’t you?” You asked him.

He looked up at you, at your arms crossed over your chest, and the angry yet broken look you had cast on your brow. You waited a moment before responding.

“You’re gonna be late for your flight, I’d hate for you to keep your team waiting.”

He knew it was over the moment you uttered those words, and it only made him angry. He needed to do this, he needed to save people so that he could feel like he was righting his wrongs, but you would never understand that.

“Fine then.” He said, getting up and grabbing the bag, slinging it over his shoulder.

He brushed right past you, as if you were nothing more than the wind behind him, even thought you were so much more than that.

He heard a final choked sob from your throat as he opened the door of your house, the cold air rushing in as a gust of snow hit him and made his eyes water.

For a moment he stopped, looking behind his shoulder to see you one last time. You weren’t standing anymore, you were on you knees, staring at the floor. Your eyes locked for a moment and he saw the flowing tears - tears that he’d caused - and he knew he couldn’t take it any longer.

He walked out the door, and closed it shut behind him.

As he made his way to his bike, which was barely drive-able given the conditions of the road, he noted that the small wrapped box the breast pocket of his jacket weighed a little heavier than he remembered it being when he’d placed it in there this morning.

He stopped, taking the gift out of his jacket and marching back to your door. He wanted to knock, he wanted to give this to you the way he’d pictured giving it to you on Christmas morning for months, but he knew he couldn’t. Not anymore.

So he opened your mailbox and gently placed the poinsettia wrapped ring box inside for you to find later.

Bucky’s heart clenched at the image of your left hand, graced with the ring he chose for you, the one he wanted you to wear for the rest of your life. The ring that he knew broke your heart when you saw it for the first time.

He hated himself for leaving it in your mailbox, but he knew you should have it, it was meant for you after all.

As he glanced down at his phone again, he realized the coffee shop was no doubt closing soon, which meant he needed to figure out exactly what he was going to do.

Realistically he knew there was only one option.

Your house was maybe about a block away, and given the storm outside, he’d be lucky if he made it there without freezing half to death, let alone trying to get somewhere else.

He sighed, running his fingers through his hair at the thought of you seeing him again for the first time. He’d be lucky if you even let him in to warm up let alone stay the night on Christmas Eve, the very night he walked out on you a year ago.

It sickened him, the idea of seeing you again.

He was still angry, mad at your for not understanding why he needed to go, that he needed to feel like he was righting his wrongs. But he also knew it was wrong for him to blame you for the split like he had been, it wasn’t entirely your fault.

Bucky got out of his seat, zipped up his jacket, and thanked the barista again before opening the door of the coffee shop and braving the snow outside.

The walk seemed much longer than it really was, he could barely make out two feet ahead of him but his keen sense of direction lead him back to your place. He knew the route like the back of his hand.

Even the streetlights were drowned out by the colossal mess of blizzard that stung Bucky’s eyes as he trudged through the wind.

When he finally saw your street sign, it was like the gates of heaven had opened up for him. It was only another minute to you house.

He stood outside of your house, staring at the Christmas lights like a sailor might stare at the beacon of the beam coming from a lighthouse. Salvation.

Climbing up your porch steps, he rang your doorbell, thankful for the roof that now provided him some protection against the cold and snow.

He’d never heard a sweeter sound taen that of your door unlocking and swinging open. He practically cried out in joy at the noise.

When he saw you though, he forgot about the storm. He forgot about everything. He could only see how beautiful you looked.

You were exactly how he’d left you, Christmas sweater and all. Your hair was done up perfectly, cheeks rosy from baking no doubt.

He watched your smile melt into nothing when you saw him, and he wondered if this was a good idea.

“Bucky?” You yelled over the wind, “What the hell are you doing out there!”

You tugged him inside your house and shut the door, quickly unzipping his jacket and hanging it up on the rack.

Bucky shivered as you raced into your living room and plucked a blanket from the couch, hurriedly returning and placing it around his shoulders.

“How long have you been out there? It’s nearly 30 below! Jesus Christ you could’ve fucking died.” Curses flew from your mouth as you ushered him further into the house.

You firmly took his hand and lead him into the bedroom, opening drawers wildly as he sat on the bed and watched you, trying to warm himself up.

Finally finding what you were looking for, you tossed him a pair of sweats and a large sweater.

You sighed, “You, uh, left these here. Now you can put them to good use. I’ll put the kettle on for you.”

And with that, you retreated out of your own bedroom and allowed him to change.

Bucky’s head was spinning, partly from the cold and partly from your generosity. You hadn’t even asked him why he was at your door, you just let him in.

He quickly tugged on the sweats and sweater, thanking God that he’d been dumb enough to forget them here last year. With the blanket still on his shoulders, he came into the living room again.

You were already waiting for him, your back pressed against the counter, eyes meeting instantly when he walked out. Your face was expressionless, as if you were waiting for him to say something, but he didn’t.

“Bucky, why are you here?” You finally said.

“I was workin’ a mission, flight got cancelled. Hotels were all booked… didn’t know where else to go.” He said, sniffling.

You nodded your head.

A silence enveloped you both. What exactly was supposed to happen now? The kettle boiling broke you away from the tension. You poured two cups of tea as slowly as possible, trying to think of something to say to him, but nothing came to you.

When you turned back around to him, his mouth was already open.

“I’m sorry.”

Your eyebrows shot up, you weren’t expecting that.

“You’re sorry?”

“Yes.”

Your nostrils flared, you couldn’t believe him. He showed up at your doorstep out of no where on Christmas Eve and now all of the sudden he wants to apologize?

“Are you fucking kidding me?” You asked, “You expect me to just forgive you for this, don’t you? As if nothing happened. You left me, Bucky, without even considering what I was saying.”

“I know. I was wrong.” He said, eyes dropping to the floor.

“And it took you a year to figure that out?” You laughed dryly.

“(Y/N) I-”

“Do you know how it feels to have someone you love walk out on you and never even try to contact you after?”

His heart sank to his stomach.

“You broke my heart like it was fucking nothing!”

Bucky watched as tears came to your eyes.

“I didn’t want to hurt you!” He snapped, “You never understood anything that I was trying to tell you! I didn’t mean to…”

“Didn’t mean to what, Bucky?”

“I didn’t mean to break your heart,” He sighed, regretting coming to your place at all, “This was a mistake. I should go.”

He rested the blanket on the chair beside him, and walked over to the coat rack where he grabbed his jacket. Shrugging it on he opened the door and stepped out into the snow again.

It had stopped coming down so violently, it was now a gently snow fall. Bucky stopped for a moment to admire it when he heard the door open behind him.

“Buck…”

“You don’t have to say anything to me, (Y/N).”

“I know.”

“Then why are you doin’ out in the cold, doll?” The nickname rolled off his tongue faster then he could stop it.

“I shouldn’t have gone off on your like that.” He heard you sigh from behind him as he watched the streetlights flicker gently above.

“I shouldn’t have either.” He admitted.

“Look, Bucky I know we hate each other but it’s Christmas Eve and your flight was cancelled. Please come inside, I don’t want you freezing to death on my doorsteps.”

He glanced over his shoulder at you, a pleading look on your face as you held a mug of tea out to him; an olive branch.

He turned to you, looking at the way the twinkling Christmas lights on your roof cascading light onto your face. You looked so perfect.

He reached out and grabbed the mug, a silent sign of agreement.

Bucky let you lead him back into your home, taking off his jacket and taking back the blanket to warm up again in front of the fire you’d started in the fireplace.

A silence much more comfortable than the previous one settled among you both as you sat next to him on the floor, a blanket of your own covering you.

Each of you staring straight ahead, Bucky was shocked to hear you pipe up next to him.

“I’m sorry too.”

His neck snapped over to look at you.

“What?” He asked.

You sighed, eyes locked forward, “I should’ve tried to understand you better. I only saw it from my perspective. It was selfish of me. I’m sorry.”

Bucky watched the way your shoulders slumped as you said it, you looked defeated as you sipped your tea.

“It’s okay.” He said.

“It’s not okay.”

“Maybe not, but I forgive you either way.” He shrugged.

“Thank you.” You whispered, “I forgive you too.”

You didn’t see it, but a smile curved it’s way onto Bucky’s face at your words as more silence ensued in harmony with the sound of the fire crackling and the soft sips of tea.

Soon however, you got up without explanation and ventured into your bedroom. Bucky heard some shuffling and a few cuss words before you emerged from the room with a Christmas wrapped cylinder in your hand.

“I never got to give this to you last year.” You said, sitting back down next to him and handing it to him.

“(Y/N), you don’t have to-”

“I know.”

He sighed, and glanced down at the gift before he began to tear away at the paper. What was underneath was a cardboard container, which he popped the cap off of at the top and pulled a rolled up poster out of.

Unrolling it, Bucky’s mouth was agape.

“It’s a map of the stars from the night we first met,” You explained, “I set the coordinates just right too. If you were to have looked up at the sky that night, you would’ve seen exactly this.”

Bucky took in a shaky breath as he rested it on the floor to admire the starmap.

“I figured you could take it back to the tower and hang it up so even when I wasn’t with you - I was still with you in some way.”

Bucky could hear you getting choked up and he struggled himself to contain his emotions. In an instant the thought of his gift he’d left for you in the mailbox last year flashed into his brain.

“When I was leaving, I left something in your mailbox…” Bucky trailed along, still looking down at the map, “Did you ever-”

When his eyes snapped up to you, he saw you pulling a chain out from under you sweater, the pendant on the end none other than the very ring Bucky had meant to propose to you with.

“I got it.” You said simply.

Bucky’s heart skipped and before he knew it he was pulling you closer to him, his lips on yours to soothe the ache that he felt in his heart.

Your mouths moved in a beautiful sync with one another as you each marveled at the feeling of kissing the other again.

Bucky had forgotten how sweet your lips were, how perfect it felt to kiss you and to hold you close to him.

“I’m so sorry I wasn’t here for Christmas last year.” He breathed out when you broke apart.

“You’re here now,” You sighed, resting comfortably in his arms, “That’s all that matters.”

#jbwinterchallenge #bucky x reader #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes #mcu #marvel imagine #bucky barnes imagine #steve rogers #steve x reader #steve rogers x reader #infinity war #bucky smut

435 notes · View notes

madam-lit-nerd · 8 years ago

Text

High Odds

Balthazar heard the lock click into place on his office door as he let out a long sigh; another end to another day. He wouldn’t have to be back to this wretched building for another sixteen hours, thank god. He stuffed his keys into his pocket as he spun about and headed for the elevator.

As he approached, he saw the ever familiar figure standing, waiting. A small smile touched his lips as he stepped up next to the dark-haired man. This was, without a doubt, the best part of his day.

“Hey, Cassie!” He greeted warmly. Castiel jolted out of whatever reverie he was following. He glanced guiltily at his coworker.

“Hello, Balthazar.”

Always Balthazar; always the full name. Never Balth or Zar like the others in their office were prone to call him. Balth wasn’t sure if he liked it or not.

Their elevator dinged as it arrived, and they stepped on in unison. As they began their descent, Balthazar was reminded yet again that his time with Cas, this daily thirty-eight second window, was limited; if he was going to ask him, it needed to be now.

“So listen, a few of us are going down to that new bar on State. Wanna join?” He wiggled his eyebrows, trying to go for a teasing tone, trying to act like it didn’t matter to him one way or another if Cas turned him down. He’d turned him down before; but then again, he’d also said yes before. Balth was hoping for the latter.

Castiel sighed. “I’d like to, but I’m afraid I have another appointment.” Balth tried not to let his disappointment show. Castiel smiled encouragingly. “Maybe later this week?”

Balth perked up. “Yeah, of course! I’ll, uh, let you know how it is. If it sucks, we can hit up another spot or something…”

Castiel nodded. “Of course.”

The elevator stopped with a ding, and the doors slid open. Cas hurried away with little more than a farewell, and Balth tried not to look too lovesick as he stared after him.

Months upon months, this had been their routine, and no matter how many feelers he had put out, it was always the same. The few times Castiel had said yes to his invitations (and Balth hated to admit this) there’d been nothing but friendship in his tone and air.

But there wasn’t anybody; Balth had checked! And he had checked. Maybe Castiel just wasn’t ready to be in a relationship…

With another sigh, Balthazar turned toward the garage, in the opposite way Cas had gone, and trudged toward his too-expensive car to go to his too-big house to get ready for his too-single night on the town.

Balth arrived a good ten minutes after the others, late but not too late. He smiled flirtatiously at the cute bartender as he served up the drinks, winked at the waitress as she took their food order, flirted outrageously with Kyle from HR, but none of it actually mattered.

Nothing mattered, until…

“Oh my god!” Hael squeaked. “Is that…Castiel?”

Balth spun around to where she was pointing, not even caring if he appeared too eager. He didn’t need to worry; everyone else spun around just as quickly.

Sure enough, right across the street at the pricey street cafe, Castiel was being seated at a table for two with a tall, admittedly gorgeous man. What the hell?

“Is that…” Hester breathed.

“I think it is!” Hanna exclaimed.

“What?” Balth asked irritably.

“Dean Smith…” they all sighed in unison. The second they said it, Balth knew who it was. Wealthy, handsome…single. Was he with Cassie? Like, with with him?

He needed to watch this, just to be sure…but he needed a better seat for that. In an effort to not look so obvious, Balth went up to the bar to grab another drink, then claimed the seat that had a clear view of the couple across the street when he returned.

Within five minutes, Balth knew he had nothing to be worried about. In fact, he was actually feeling pretty damn good about himself. From the frigid way Cas was acting toward this Dean Smith character, he may as well have been blowing kissy faces and winking at Balth during their elevator chats.

He barely looked at the guy, completely avoiding his gaze when he did manage to glance in his direction. He didn’t actually speak all that often. He kept their contact as minimal as possible, answering with a few terse words here or there.

Damn, what had this guy done to piss Castiel off? Whatever it was, Balth needed to know so he could avoid it.

But suddenly, something shifted. The Dean guy said something that definitely caught Cassie’s attention. He suddenly went from frigidity and silence to anger within a heartbeat. He started shaking his head and glaring straight at the guy.

Seconds later he was standing and throwing his napkin on the table, obviously ready to make an escape. Perfect! Balth would catch him on the way out, offer him a sympathetic ear, maybe buy him a drink. He’d get boyfriend material points on top of figuring out exactly how Castiel knew this Dean Smith.

He hurried outside to the dark street, making it to the sidewalk at the same time as Cassie. He tried to wave him down, but Castiel was already hurrying away. He was about to chase after him, when he realized that Dean had already beaten him to the punch. He was running after Castiel, calling his name.

“Cas! Cas, please!” Dean finally caught up to the dark-haired man at the entrance of a secluded set of stairs. He grabbed onto his arm. “Cas, let me exp…”

“No!” Cas cried, spinning around on him, shoving a finger in his face. “No! You don’t get to do this! Not after…after… you know!”

He was more animated than Balthazar had ever seen him. He was passionate, fiery, gorgeous.

Holy shit, he was totally in love with Dean Smith.

Dean must have come to the same realization at that moment, because he used the arm he still held to yank Cas into a heated kiss.

From what Balth could see, if looked like Cas actually responded at first. His hands slid up Dean’s chest to tangle with his tie, his body leaned in ever so slightly, his head angled just right…but suddenly he yanked back and slapped Dean across the cheek hard enough that Dean’s head snapped to the side.

Balth crept closer and hid behind a nearby pillar. He knew his hiding place was dark enough that they wouldn’t see him, and even if they could, they were too caught up with their argument to bother looking around for eavesdroppers.

“What the hell?” Castiel was yelling, tears pouring down his cheeks. “What are you thinking?” He shoved at Dean’s chest angrily, but Dean didn’t budge. “You think you can come waltzing back in here, years after you broke my heart, and just pick up again? I’m not going to do it, Dean! I’m not going to just be your little secret plaything.” He shoved Dean again. “I moved across the country to forget you! And now…Now?” He shoved his finger in Dean’s face. “I won’t fall in love with you again!”

He broke down into sobs then, his entire body shuddering as he brought his hands up to hide his face. Dean wrapped his long arms around Cas and pulled him in, pressing his lips to his temple.

“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry!” He repeated, again and again. He began to whisper to Cas then, soft words Balth couldn’t hear from his hidden spot. Cas pulled back, his eyes damp and unbelieving.

“What?”

“I needed to know…” Dean explained haltingly.

“Needed to know what?” Cas murmured warily.

“If you were still in love with me.”

“I’m not!” Castiel assured him immediately, but all three of them could see straight through that flimsy excuse for a lie.

But Dean didn’t call him on it. Instead, he nodded and drew a deep breath. “Okay…so it looks like I have my work cut out for me.”

“What work?”

“Well, I recently was offered a job in town, so…” he let the thought trail off as Castiel’s eyes widened.

“Where?”

“Sandover,” he replied a little too nonchalantly.

Castiel shook his head. “That’s right near where I work!”

Dean nodded. “I know. Which was why I needed to know if I had any chance in hell of winning you back,” he admitted. “And I think I just got my answer.”

Cas shook his head. “I won’t be fooled again, Dean.”

“I know,” Dean murmured. “And if it means anything, I never meant to fool you last time. I just…didn’t realize what I had til it was too late.”

“It doesn’t mean anything,” Cas insisted, yet another flimsy lie that was so transparent any child could have seen through it.

“That’s okay. Just means I’ll have to work twice as hard,” Dean teased with an affectionate smile.

“Yeah, might as well not put in the work at all…” Cas hedged.

Dean shook his head. “You’re worth it…we’re worth it. I’ll do whatever it takes to win you back, Cas. I promise, I won’t let what we have slip away again.”

Cas stared at him for several long moments, then shook his head. “Well, good luck with that.”

“Good luck?” Dean arched a brow.

“You’re going to have to win my trust back and beat out Balthazar. So really, you’re doing triple the amount of work.”

“Balthazar?” Dean questioned as Cas slipped away. The dark-haired man began walking in the opposite direction of where Balth was hiding, away from the bar and restaurant.

Cas’s voice held a challenge. “Cute guy who works on my floor. He’s been after me for a while now. I’ve been thinking that I should give him a shot.”

Balthazar silently punched the air in a tiny victory dance. He was so in! He was so busy celebrating, he almost missed the final exchange between the former lovers.

“Goodnight, Cas,” Dean called out, amusement lacing his tone.

“Goodnight, Mr. Smith,” Cas called back.

Balth waited until Dean had walked away before he finally stepped out of his hiding spot and headed back toward the bar. As he walked, he thought about potential spots for his first date with Cas.

He’d have to make it fantastic to compete with the likes of this Dean Smith. And yeah, he knew it was a long shot, but at least it was a shot, right?

Higher odds had been beaten before.

Hello! So this was a quick little something that I wrote a while back but didn’t post bc I wasn’t even sure if I completely liked it. But I reread it today, and I enjoyed it. So here you go, a quick little drabble. I don’t know if I’ll continue it; I can see some definite hilarity ensuing from the Dean/Balth competition… guess it depends on the feedback. Anyways, hope you like it!!

#yeah i wrote something #destiel #destiel ficlet #office au #outsider POV #dean smith #pining!balth #jilted!cas #second chances #dean x castiel #Dean smith x Castiel #Castiel x Balthazar

28 notes · View notes