#this is just me screaming my frustration into the void

[alltheshadesofamber]

CHRONIC RECURRING LAZARUS PIT MADNESS ISN’T REAL, CHRONIC RECURRING LAZARUS PIT MADNESS ISN’T REAL, CHRONIC RECURRING LAZARUS PIT MADNESS ISN’T REAL, AND IT WASN’T A PIT SIDE EFFECT THAT JASON TODD WAS SHOWN TO GET WHEN HE WAS HEALED ANYWAY! JASON TODD DID BAD THINGS AND HE CHOSE TO DO THEM! HE’S NOT A SAD LONELY LITTLE IMPRESSIONABLE BABY WHO CAN’T MAKE HIS OWN DECISIONS OR EXCERCISE ANY SELF-CONTROL! STOP TAKING AWAY HIS AGENCY! STOP MAKING HIM A BORING GUILT-RIDDEN WOOBIE! JASON TODD STANDS BY EVERYTHING HE’S DONE AND HE DID IT ALL BECAUSE HE WANTED TO! SHUT UP ABOUT LAZARUS PIT MADNESS ON MY POSTS!

[astro-cattus]

Sometimes i listen to my friends talk about falling in love n shit. And it boggles my mind how it takes them like 3-4 business days to decide they want to spend the rest of their life with someone.

When it takes me 6 years to even consider the possibility, and even then I have to calculate if it’s really worth my time.

[mochiwrites]

being so honest I don’t understand how people can expect you to be doing things constantly every single day. I’m supposed to be on summer break but my university expects me to send in 80 sources for my senior thesis by next week

the very thought of doing school work right now makes me want to cry. I can’t even open a blank document and start writing for my own fics. I can’t even engage in my own hobby right now because I’m so mentally exhausted. how can you expect me to do thesis work? I’ve hardly had a break since finals

my personal life has been an ongoing shitshow since last summer. and has only gotten worse in recent months. how can you expect someone to function in society when you throw one thing after another at them?

I’m so tired and done. but I have no choice other than pushing through it because that’s what’s expected of me! that’s exhausting

[sp4ceboo]

rant but im a bit scared im going to get attacked

[destiny-in-the-universe]

i really hate being that person but it's kind of bumming me out when content for my original characters doesn't seem to gain as much of an... outreach? apologies for my soddy english, brain isn't brain'ing atm which is also frustrating, but in comparison to content for the canons- i just... don't know if people truly want me to continue writing for those oc's or even the shipping i do between canon x oc

and this isn't about anyone in particular. on the contrary! i'm happy that people still interact with my messy blog of the latest hyperfixation- it's just the oc's are thrown into the background, and i don't know if that's got something to do with changing views on them. honestly, i'm not- mad per se, just wish they got recognition.

also i felt venting into the void, since probably no one's to read this, might ease me out of that frustration because i'll continue writing about said original characters- no matter how many people watch it tbh

[tsireyqs]

i hate my boss

[jellyfishdooter]

.

[anxiously-going]

.

[bookmark-extraordinaire]

I hate when people say that talent does not exist.

“Uhm sweaty, just draw everyday and you’ll get better, art is 80% practice anyway” bitch I’ve been working on that 80% for years now, it’s that last 20% I’m missing, and I always will. Fuck you. There will always be something too difficult for me to grasp, or something that comes natural to somebody else that I will never be able to replicate, no matter how much practice I do or how many references I use.

I feel so worthless sometimes. Seeing so many younger artists breeze past me in terms of talent, speed, anatomy etc. Maybe I should just find a real job and just keep art as my side hobby instead of trying so hard to make it my profession. My art is way too mediocre, it’ll never be profitable. Nobody cares.

Sometimes I wonder if my style is just missing something. A spark, anything that will get people interested. People look at my art for a whole 2 seconds, leave a like, then forget about it. I’m so tired. I hate complaining but it kinda does suck when you’ve been making art for literal years and never even had a commission. Not even a pity donation on Kofi. But no, the only time my art gets noticed is when I’m doing things for free.

“Oh but you shouldn’t think about money when making art, you should create for yourself first!!!” Shut up. I’m so tired. I’ve done everything wrong. Art was never my path in the first place no matter how much I wanted it to be.

“Oh just practice harder you’ll see the results!” Bitch what do you think I’ve been doing for the past 13 years? Just bang your head against a wall harder, maybe this time you’ll have your big breakthrough! God I’m so tired. I wonder how many people will notice if I stopped posting art completely

[the-sparkling-diamond-satine]

.

[trees-can-draw]

Hm.

[virgil-upinthestars]

look it's late and I can't sleep but why is it that a lot of media spends all its time dancing with a big will-they-won't-they and then ends almost immediately after they do?? my good sirs I waited all this time I was so patient it may be a nice and easy way to de-escalate tension towards the end of the story but I am sad and lonely give me ESTABLISHED RELATIONSHIP you COWARDS

[drowninginthoughts27]

.

[moafleco]

i hate that duality that your mind can be your safe heaven that helps you get through some difficult things, keeps you going and brings you happiness at the worst of times. and at the very same time it could be your worst tormentor that won't let you rest and won't let you breathe, literally for no particular reason at all. and you can't leave or silence it. can't get it to stop when it gets dark in there. can't get the light in when you desperately need to feel a respite instead of suffocation.

[thats-a-lot-of-cortisol]

My mom just sent a message to the family group chat suggesting that my siblings download the 'For the Strength of Youth' magazine on their Gospel Library app and talked about how much the youth magazines helped her testimony growing up and like, cool. Fine. Don't know why the 'sending random spiritual thoughts in the gc' thing started out of nowhere when it hadn't been a thing for a decade but this is just another one of those, and you're ofc allowed to talk about things that are significant in your life.

I don't think sending the 'What I Did When Someone Close to Me Challenged My Faith' article right afterwards was strictly necessary though 🙃

[subtlybrilliant]

Pls be proud of me:

I waited until I was in my car and out of the parking lot before I started ugly crying, so…yay.