#apostake

[xmo-rmon]

“Inseminary”

or “Lockpick to the Priesthood” or “Come Unto Me” or “Pearl Necklace of Great Price” or “Faith is Like a Little Seed”

Authentic stolen holy text, Near Clear silicone, gold pigment.

I went to the mormon church’s website, looked up their views on homosexuality, noted the scriptures they referenced, ripped them by hand out of the bible and book of mormon I stole from their chapel, and then mixed them into a silicone dildo of my own design like confetti. A dildo which will of course be used for homosexual purposes (with non-lubricated condoms and water based lube, for safety).

I’ve wanted to try dildo making for literally over a decade. I don’t have any fancy equipment like a 3D printer or a vacuum chamber, I made the sculpt by hand, and I fucked up a lot along the way, but all that being said I’m proud of what I was able to accomplish and I learned a lot. I put in more gold than I meant to, but honestly, it was meant to represent scripture’s gilded edges, and as it turned out, it looks really beautiful or quite filthy depending on the lighting, which feels entirely appropriate for scripture.

It was hard to read all of those verses. But as I tore them up I bathed them in the intention to take words that were meant to inflict queer pain wherever they go, and say “Actually, I pull those words out when I want some queer pleasure.” Build joy where they want you to have it the least.

Read about/donate to the Timpanogos tribe, for whom brigham young sent out an “extermination order”

LandBack

[bromantically]

quitmormon.com (a pro-bono legal team that helps people resign from the church) is fundraising to get a full-time paid lawyer and provide free mental health services to people leaving mormonism (especially LGBTQ+ people and our allies)

link to send support:

[nobetafortomorrowedie]

It really bothers me when people describe the way I grew up as "sheltered" when in reality I was not being sheltered or protected. I was intentionally confused. I was kept in the dark. My reality was being controlled.

[parkakeet]

this unlocked some memories omg

[growingupmormon]

My sister: it’s so weird that Mormons can just spot another Mormon out in the wild even those who’ve left. Like in high school we got clocked as Mormon and we could tell who was too.

It’s essentially social isolation, you mirror the behaviors of those around you growing up, if everyone around you isolates themselves from the outside world then you’re all gonna start to be a little weird to the outside world making it harder to leave, it’s subtle mannerisms we learned for sure

It’s that and Mormon Face!

[icannotgetoverbirds]

Here's your biannual reminder to check in on your exmo moots and queerstake moots cause general conference is coming up (i believe it's this weekend?). Be extra gentle with them rn, they're probably going through a lot of emotions.

[exmo-memes]

If someone is putting oil on me and touching me to make me feel better, it's going to be in a VERY different context. But in all seriousness, blessings do nothing. Go to a doctor or therapist or an otherwise qualified professional

[filius-perditionis]

its really fucked up that mormons send out young men (barely even adults) to be as annoying as possible so that they get yelled at to solidify the churches doctrine of "you cant trust anyone outside of the church. if you leave you will never be happy" and call it a mission

[3-inch-doodles]

going to church

[xmo-rmon]

“Eternal or Nothing”

I mean the more literal question is right there - can I wager 10% of my life’s income? Sure, if it’s in the motherfucking casino of zion.

Read about/Donate to the Timpanogos tribe, for whom brigham young sent out an “extermination order”

LandBack

[oncethestarssetoverthesteeple]

I was forcefully forged in faith fuled flames.

Nothing but inconsiderate, incessant, and inconsolable.

These flames hotter than a hell never heralded.

But despite the verses and vocab and veritable verocity of education,

All I can say now is:

Why do they get to be upset,

I was just a fucking kid.

[nobetafortomorrowedie]

I am always constantly 100 percent of the time thinking about how Mormonism uses the pervasive idea of "free agency" to convince people in the church that they have a choice when they really don't. How they tout "free agency" as one of their core tenets and then turn around and coerce people into swearing oaths in secret cult ceremonies. Mormons are not and have never been free.

[parkakeet]

idk but when I was a kid I would read constantly as a form of escapism and then when I was finally yanked from my fantasy world and into the real one I had dissociated so hard that there was a cognitive dissonance that made me try to rationalize that the real world was wrong and that I belonged in the fantasy world.

my parents would take away my book and put me on a church pew and I would become genuinely distressed because I was trying to remember what fantastical thing was happening to me.

idk, something something cults and not feeling safe in your real life.

[growingupmormon]

When someone finds out I was raised Mormon and their response is an excited

“omg, can I ask you some questions?!”

Special interest info dump imminent

[peppermint-rat]

"XMO Heart Attack"

Glued inside the stall door of a bathroom in a mormon chapel. "Praise to the man" is one of the most disgusting hymns to me. It was a real struggle to keep it in my head long enough to write this. I know saying you were literally shaking is kind of an eye roll on here (for good reason) but I can honestly say I was trembling with rage as I composed this. So cathartic to finally, finally do something with that anger.

Timpanogos tribe's website where you can learn more and donate

LandBack

Poem in plain text under the cut

Praise to the man who wrote Doctrine & Covenants!

Verse 59, Section 132

Nothing is sinful if men do it in God's name

Thank Joe for that, or the mormons would be doomed

Praise to our Brigham, who ordered "EXTERMINATION!"

A series of massacres we call the "Black Hawk War"

Those poor Timpanogos, they were killed by the thousands

But our grand, spacious building was built upon the gore

The mormon militia carved the heads from their victims

For two weeks, the captives were forced to watch them rot

Those women and children were then sold into slavery

They were Lamanites; they deserved what they got

Your children sing of "Lamanites", just as I did

So don't try to tell me it's different today

Say that your prophet told you, "Murder your brother"

Could you, a good mormon, really disobey?

Packer and Oaks said, "Sometimes truth is not useful"

What useful lies have they told you instead?

Pulled threads cannot unravel truth, so I ask thee

Why have they made it a sin to pull their thread?

This made you uncomfortable, and thus, must be evil

A test of your faith, I remember, yes, I know

But Jesus will want to know why you're cool with murder

He won't be impressed when you say, "Have you met Joe?"

"Sacrifice brings forth the blessings of Heaven"?

The church must atone for the blood on stolen land!

Wake up, the world will see your buried injustice;

Millions SHALL KNOW "Brother Joseph" again!

[exmo-memes]

Every time I think I've sufficiently covered it, I remember something else that's just unhinged