#the suicide ment is not current

[rejoiceandcomplain]

microdosing on suicidal ideation by listening to lonely by palaye royale and go home by julien baker back to back

[clowniconography]

its so wild to me how people on here will pretend like the internet of the past was actually fr safer for children than it is now instead of being exactly as bad just in different ways. as if children having to coach grown adults through their suicidal ideation hasn't been a stereotype of forum culture on here for years

[antisatiric]

if i had a nickel for every time twain (guy who tried to kill himself in a river related way) dated a guy who tried to kill himself in a river related way. i would have 2 nickels. which isnt a lot but its weird that it happened twice

[nomaishuttle]

sibling meetjng looking at eachither So what are we some kind of suicide squad

[corvidlvr51]

Gonna drink 1 1/2 bottle of wine tonight because I shouldn't kill myself

[trans-leek-cookie]

STOP sexualizing ABUSE and START sexualizing SUICIDE!!!!!!

[evilkitten3]

@the-real-sasuke-uchiha that's fair!

my theory is that one day after passing on the hat he walked into the forest of death and didn't come back out again (that's why it got that name) and no one ever really knew the specifics. if it was too wildly pathetic there'd be stories no matter how hard people tried to suppress it. i think he died alone in the woods talking to what may or may not have been a hallucination of the best friend he killed

it's interesting to experiment with ideas about how hashirama actually died but imo the way hashirama tells his story in volume 65 says so much more about who he was at the end of his life than anything canon could've shown us. i think leaving it up in the air was the right call

[purpleyoonn]

Stop encouraging hara&ment against other people, every day someone extermine themselves due to waves of virtual hara&ment. What she did was wrong, OBVIOUS, but you yk how the fandom are

Isn't it enough that there are countless wars happening around the world and innocent people dy!ng for nothing??

I'm tired of being part of a fandom that spreads hate normally and then continues the day like "now it'ts ok, one less here". I'm telling you, If another person d!e& again because of something futile, her bl00d will also be in your hands Mari

Never forget that.

okay wow you took that to the extreme.

no where in that post did i actively encourage harassment to the girl who sexually assaulted jin. i said that i wasn't surprised she was getting any form of harassment and shouldn't be surprised or upset about it. if it was any other person would you also defend them in the name of someone having it worse in the world?

yes, i did write "count your days" in that post. but if you follow me and actually read any of my posts, i was being dramatically sarcastic as is normal with my posts. i do have some problems with tone as i am autistic so i can see where i might have problems with that or come across to new followers as being serious.

but also, to equate this situation with the war in palestine and the current genocide occurring against palestinian people is in no way related to this situation and completely invalidates so many peoples experiences with assault on all forms. any negative experience anyone could have is instantly invalidated by the bringing up of current wars or innocent people dying.

i was sexually assaulted the first time at 12 yrs old and literally thought my entire world was over. i spent almost a week in a psychiatric unit because i tried committing suicide.

yes, my experience is more that just getting an unexpected and unwarranted kiss on the neck, but for you to say what you did is taking my post to the extreme.

invalidating anyone's experiences is wrong just because "someone has it worse".

i don't condone assault in any form and while i wish this incident didn't happen in the first place, especially at an event jin fought so hard to have, actions like this have consequences (pls don't send any hate to the girl) and i don't know the girl but if this was planned or even if this wasn't planned, she should have known the reaction army would have when kissing his neck at an event that jin did to be able to see army again after 18 months.

[homo-house]

hi!

this is my personal blog & I post about whatever here. I have an art blog @mister-sol but I decided to not post my house md sketches there so they go here instead

there are some constants to what I post such as house md, good omens, franz kafka, hannibal, jayvik. I’m really into sad gruesome and problematic shit like cannibalism (as a concept). I also occasionally post sketches and pictures I take here. I have strong (political/philosophical) beliefs and opinions (again idc about fandom drama) so I can be annoying but I don't try to be mean.

I am ND, forgetful, very anxious, and don’t do very well with social interactions so pls forgive me if I don’t reply to asks/dms quickly or at all, it’s hard sometimes and 100% nothing personal.

Important: I like insects and some animals that a lot of people dislike, but I always tag them, so if they give u the ick just mute the tags. I only ask that u tag images of syringes as I have a phobia.

Feel free to request that i tag CW anything else that upsets you in some way and is not listed here

Funky animals I like

centipedes

cockroaches

rats

bats

snakes

frogs

Media/ships (no particular order)

Good Omens/aziracrow

House M.D./hilson

Hannibal/hannigram

Doctor Who/tenrose

Cobra Kai/lawrusso

Looney Tunes/baffy

South Park/creek

A Little Life

The Mentalist/jisbon

Homestuck (RARELY I swear)

League of Legends/vikjayce

Other stuff probably

Sensitive topics are tagged appropriately but i'm still figuring these out

suicide ment

death ment

SH ment

current politics (from anywhere)

war ment

cw transphobia

cw racism

queer discourse

gore

Types of media

video, gifs

[aspdzai]

🩹　　DAZAI OSAMU / 太宰 治

hello !! it’s dazai , your favorite suicidal pretty boy ! i’m here to make friends if possible :3

i’m autistic so tonetags are pretty helpful ! i may also come off as uncaring at times , this is because i have low empathy / sympathy / compassion ( i am aware they aren’t the same , i’m generalizing )

i have no dni !! anyone can int. as long as they are interacting with good faith !

— she / her , he / him , it / its

— bisexual with a pref. for men

— radqueer leaning

　　　　　pro - transid

　　　　　pro - choice recovery

— source connected

　　　　　sourcemates please int. !

　　　　　bsd fans please int. !

ℹ️　　MORE INFO :

plural ( pro - endo , anti - syscourse )

religious ( in - sys religion )

disordered and disabled ( phys. and ment. )

punk ( pluralpunk , genicpunk , contrapunk )

ramcoa survivor ( mc and oa )

i am pro - transid for anything i am . identity is not limited to the cis experience !!

🫀　　ANONYMOUS LIST :

none currently . . .

[unlawfulbread5]

Current head image

A suicidal woman is about to end her life by jumping off a building but is interrupted by a surfer dude and he says

"yo bro you about to end your life dawg?"

"yes and don't try to stop me my life is a mess and Its better off if I'm gone"

"bro I understand, I was suicidal too but then I thought about potatos."

"what?"

"you know like the small brown lumpy things"

"I know what a potato is what meant was ... Never mind good bye"

"oh I get it, i ment like look at a potato like it can be in so many forms dude, like french fries or potato salad, Croquettes, wedges, like if a potato can change I can too you know I'm not worse than a potato dawg"

"huh"

And the woman backs down from the ledge and her and the surfer go get burgers.

[magnuficent76]

Hey guys I'm Normal about ocs. Here's Baltazar because I love them so so bad.

- What would they be embarrassed to admit about themself? What would they deny about themself?

☆ Baltazar is ashamed of literally Every Part Of Himself even if he really wishes he wasn't. It's more compulsory than anything, but they feel like if they're vulnerable for even a split second everyone is going to immediately start taking them apart the same way they do it to themselves. His whole life has been shameful in his eyes and as such unless he's ABSOLUTELY SURE he can trust other people, he would rather hide it all behind a wall of what everyone already expects and is familiar with <3 however, if they absolutely had to pick, it'd be anything related to their sports career and the whole… yk, alcoholism thing.

- Opposite to the above: What would they proudly admit, and what would they like to claim about themself?

☆ Hmmm… not a lot if we're being honest. Maybe their current profession as a farmhand/magica inspector. Or his kids ! He's real proud of those !... nd yeah nothing else.

- If caught in an inconsistency or a hypocrisy, how do they react? How would they go about fixing it, or alternatively, how would they go about denying and deconstructing it?

☆ Baltazar can't lie as per Celestial law, which makes them shake and blink compulsively to indicate them lying, but they ARE really good at wording actual facts into less conspicuous stuff. Loophole yay ! They don't often have to go back and fix their words, but if they do, they'll more often than not just add more stuff into the mix so it still won't TECHNICALLY be a lie, just a really over decorated truth. People buy it more often than not but if they don't, he just resorts to panic-gaslighting. Normal guy style.

- How much, and how deeply do they think about other characters' opinions that aren't about them specifically? For example if they knew one of their friends liked or disliked another person, how much thought do they give it?

☆ Baltazar values his friends' opinions and takes them to heart, so more often than not if his friends tell him someone is bad he'll try to keep a distance from them just until he can see if what his friends say it's true. Its a bad habit but they can't bring themselves to stop because of some codependency issues. Don't worry abouts it.

- Are they able to perform something 'Quick'? Do they prefer to sacrifice time over quality, or vice versa? How do they dispense effort per task?

☆ Oh absolutely. The switch between Baltazar's regular shy personality and their "performance" personality is like night and day. They learned how to do it early in their life so they could feel less anxious about Literally Everything, and now they do it on command. Balt, when he wants to be, is loud and unpredictable, really putting on a show for everyone around him so they don't notice how he's visibly shaking the entire time. Quality is important to him and he HATES having to do things out of the blue, often practicing several dozens of times before feeling he's got it down perfectly, but if time calls for it NOW then he's doing it NOW and he's doing it BIG. No halfwaysies we die like gods.

- How patient are they with themself vs. Others? Why, and how so?

(Small cw for suicide ment !)

☆ For everyone else, Baltazar is a saint. They can explain an instruction thousands of times in different ways just for someone to get it, and they'll be happy to assist in case they still need help, but with themself ??? Dude you might as well ask them to explode because there's nothing this man hates more than being understanding to themself. He messes up a single time and he's like "OK well guess you're too dumb nd stupid to do this even though you know how to. Fuckin idiot. Die now". He had to put a hex on himself to stop saying he's going to kill himself everytime he fails at something because it was disturbing other people. Normal style.

- How seriously do they carry other people's worries? How much does this impact their actions?

☆ They can't seriously be bothered to actually worry about themselves because of The Depression and such, but if other people express worry this guy would rather DIE than make them feel bad for not helping. Nooo girl I'm sorry I didn't take good care of myself and haven't slept for a week I'll do it right now ::( are you mad at me I'll explode for you if you want me to

- What would they Not want to change about themself? What parts of their self do they cling to, desperately? Even when those things would be already gone?

☆ This is actually kinda important in his later arc so I can't explain it too much but :3 heehoo.

- What would make them focus on themself more?

☆ People saying they want him to stop treating himself badly on purpose. It's literally like kryptonite to him. They feel SO bad having other people be worried for them so they immediately put in that extra effort to get the worry to stop.

- How do they tread around controversial opinions? Is it case by case, or depending on the company? In what way? Are they assured in their worldview or unsure? Are they open minded?

☆ Baltazar has been a punk by proxy since their conception like 3 million years ago before the word was even invented, so you bet your ass they're going to bring it up and be loud about it too. More often than not it comes up naturally and they talk about it but they're also just loud In General. His mind may be open but once something is in there it hardly ever gets out, so good luck trying to change his extremely concrete world view that has been Like That for hundreds of years now.

- How easily do they relate with other characters?

☆ He's (a little too) high empathy, so pretty easily all things considered ! Giving advice to everyone else is way easier than following it himself though...

Getting to know your character better

Here's some (hopefully) less basic things to think about when deepening your character.

- What would they be embarrassed to admit about themself? What would they deny about themself?

- Opposite to the above: What would they proudly admit, and what would they like to claim about themself?

- If caught in an inconsistency or a hypocrisy, how do they react? How would they go about fixing it, or alternatively, how would they go about denying and deconstructing it?

- How much, and how deeply do they think about other characters' opinions that aren't about them specifically? For example if they knew one of their friends liked or disliked another person, how much thought do they give it?

- Are they able to perform something 'Quick'? Do they prefer to sacrifice time over quality, or vice versa? How do they dispense effort per task?

- How patient are they with themself vs. Others? Why, and how so?

- How seriously do they carry other people's worries? How much does this impact their actions?

- What would make them focus on themself more?

- What would they Not want to change about themself? What parts of their self do they cling to, desperately? Even when those things would be already gone?

- Do they think of something as "Their thing", even though other people would disagree? Why so? Are they just not as open or upfront about it as they think? Or do they have gaps in self perception?

- Opposite of the above: Are there some things that others would consider "Their thing" in relation to your character, but they disagree? Why?

- How do they tread around controversial opinions? Is it case by case, or depending on company? In what way? Are they assured in their worldview or unsure? Are they open minded?

- How easily do they relate with other characters?

[infiniteseriesofhalfways]

Sometimes I need to get thoughts out of my brain you know?

(this is literally just me talking about knitting for awhile and then strangely, AH and my mental health tbh)

I wrote a knitting pattern that should be going up for sale this week (I hope??) and it's so wild to me bc I really only started knitting about a year ago? Like October of 2019. I'd tried multiple times ever since I learned to crochet when I was like 10, but just always struggled and hated it until one day it just... Clicked? And now I wrote a real pattern that I'm immensely proud of and I love and genuinely think is good?

I finished one and so did my mom, and we both have multiple other colorways in the works and it's because we've both had such a good time making it. I really do think it's beautiful as a pattern and I know the shawls people could make would be astounding. And I don't mean it in a 'look what a great pattern I made, what I'VE created is so wonderful' or egotistical or whatever way, I just... Genuinely love it.

The wildest part is that is started bc I was just... Fucking around with colors I liked. There was so much shit happening in October and I could not shut any part of my brain off enough with anything else, and I was so stressed and in such a bad place, so I just fucked around and made something that might give me comfort. The idea that this could be the Start Of Something because of that blows my mind.

And I'm mostly kidding here but I'm also terrified someone is going to say something about my color choice for the original and I'm going to have to admit that I 105% made it in Rimmy Tim colors bc they were the only thing I could stand to look at at the time. How do I begin to explain that to some woman on ravelry??

Anyway here's pics of part of it

Bc the actual pattern isn't out yet but I assure you there are more purple/orange bits and much less yellow as it goes on. But like... I made this! I did something! And it was completely born out of anxiety and my dear love for Jeremy's ridiculous color scheme. Which is fuckin hilarious and also part of why I love it so much.

I don't know my point here, but it's just... The world is fuckin weird sometimes. The things that inspire us. The things that turn into bigger things way beyond our imagination. Like if I hadn't stumbled upon a rage quit video 7 or 8 years ago I never would have made this. Because I wouldn't have gotten into AH, wouldn't have seen Jeremy's content, wouldn't have such a dear love for this color scheme, wouldn't have been in the kind of shit place I was in October for some of the reasons I was, wouldn't have turned to knitting to help ease the anxiety I had, wouldn't have made this thing.

Which is not even to mention all of the other parts of my life that would be different, like if I hadn't stayed on tumblr primarily bc of the AH fandom, I never would have connected with some of the wonderful folks I have, my writing would be either in a completely different place or non existent (which rn... lmao) my sense of humor might be wildly different to what it is and I might not have connected with my best friend the way that I have. He introduced me to bands that have forever shaped the way I listen to music. I went to my first concert bc of him. Would we have the relationship we have if the way I joked wasn't shaped by AH? Like the list goes on.

Honestly who would I be today if I had never heard Michael yell "swiss fucking cheese" and immediately watched other stuff he had done? Again, not even to get into what effect it's had on my mental health like... There were points where my only reason for not killing myself was so I could at least see whatever video was coming up. Which is ridiculous in a lot of ways but also even if it's something small hold on to it you know? And I'm so fucking grateful for that. It helped get me far enough to my childhood best friend coming back into my life one particular night when it wasn't enough, which is some timing I'll forever wonder about.

I just... Who would I be? Would I be at all? Shit, would I be a wildly more successful version of me instead? I don't know. I think I'm happy though, where I am. Happier than I used to be, at least. I think that counts for something. I'm not where I want to be but at least I'm not where I used to be, etc.

Anyway I really went on and on didn't I? This started as me wanting to make a joke about my first shawl pattern being Rimmy Tim colors, and then I just started thinking things. The world is weird. Life is weird. I am honestly glad to still be here though. And I think that's good.

[badnikbreaker]

@lowhowl​ : ( spotify wrapped ) 88 !     /      PEACESIGN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! - black dresses     /    accepting.

“You can try an’ kill me, but we both know you don’t got the guts — and you got your little wisp buddies back, anyway.”  Surge isn’t capable of kindness / isn’t capable of gentleness / is only capable of this sort of ugly cruelty.  WOULD YOU BELIEVE THIS IS HOW SHE EMPATHIZES?  “Or maybe you can kill me — we both know the world’d be better off without PEOPLE LIKE US in it.”

She’s like me / violent, cruel, outsider, made of pain and nothing else.  No hope, no real future, and just smoking ash for a past.  AND PEOPLE LIKE THAT DON’T BELONG IN A BEAUTIFUL, PEACEFUL WORLD, DO THEY?

Would you believe this is how she empathizes?  “Weapons like us don’t belong in the good future your new friends are trying to build.  If you kill me, you better kill yourself, too.”

[chocochipclaire]

if anyone wants to see a physical representation of the absurd ways my brain tries to rationalize all the little fictional dudes who make my brain spin like a hamster wheel

[halfelven]

oh wait i think electrocuting myself is working