#systems who maladaptive daydream

[the-moonjay-forest-system]

I wanted to share my experience with system communication as a system who maladaptively daydreams. I'm unsure if any other systems share our experience with this or idk maybe it's a sign that we're faking or are wrong about having a CDD.

We really struggle with internal communication (communication in general but this is a bit different) like talking to eachover inside our head, we do have an inner voice and if there are multiple alters near by there will be multiple voices but conversations between them just do not work.

We maladaptive daydream and it seems that's what's getting in the way of communication. If we're not actively daydreaming about the world's and characters we've created or different scenarios that could happen in the real world we're kinda just monologueing about our every thought, feeling and whatever is going on around us as if we're writing a book or something. some alters even monologue outloud if they're alone.

So let's say that there's two alters co-conscious with another and there's nothing really interesting going on or anything they're really doing the body's just calmly sitting down. In that scenario we're gonna be very compelled to daydream in some way, the two alters trying to talk to eachover are going to struggle remaining focused on talking and blocking out that urge. I don't know about you but our brain just cannot hold a conversation between two alters and some form of daydream at the same time it has to be one of another. And just like how our brain chooses to daydream over sleep, food, hobbies, socialising, work etc. It chooses it over the alter communicating.

So we have to resort to talking to eachover out loud which isn't always an option, or writing down our conversation since the daydream can't interrupt a piece of paper or a screen but even that isn't always possible. I also prefer more physical forms of communication so I know it is an actual alter talking to me and not me just imagining their response if you get what I mean?

Anyone struggle with internal communication for the same reason? Or maybe different reasons? Maybe you have some advice but I'm not sure if anything will actually help

[sonnyinthesky]

Shout out to my fellow singlets with "innerworlds/headspaces" (quotation marks as im not sure this is the correct term for a singlet to use!).

A long description of my inner world and the way my brain works is found below....

I am a maladaptive daydreamer and autistic and i have a very detailed inner world / worlds / universes that i interact with very often. I call mine my inside brain. I visualize it as a world in the center of my brain (if all brain functions were on the outer shell, this world is inside like a bubble). It is infinite. It has layers and depth and it can be zoomed in and out to different parts of it. It can also be "swiped" to a different world (i have two main ones) as well as there being many alternate versions of each world. They grow and change with me and what i need most at that time. I only interact with one main one these days but i keep the old one there, in ruins, to remind me of where ive been and how that part of me is now gone and i have a new inner world now. I also have the mind palace (inspired by bbc sherlock) which is on the edge of my "brain" and "inside brain" where i store all important things such as memories and facts in filing cabinet rooms, and there i can project the memories onto the "inside brain" to watch them the same way i watch the characters in the inside brain!!!! Its great fun honestly and has pretty much saved my life as it gives me a safe space no matter where i am. All i have to do is dissociate and go in there and im safe from harm :3 it also helps with academics because the mind palace has a black board room and a few visualizing rooms that i can do math on and picture any words ive read in respectively.

Its very hard to explain how i interact with this "inner world" because i am a singlet and its just me (and my characters who are like dolls, i control everything they do and say and how they look and act etc etc) in there. Its not like a hallucination, its entirely in my head and i watch from different angles like from the perspective of a movie camera. And i can still see the world around me when im in there. Id describe it like dreaming while awake but i am in full control, so its a daydream really, but in the same space every time and its a very detailed world.

My inner conscious is also in there. His name is Harri. His appearance and personality is who i want to be and how i want to look and his voice is how i want to sound, but he does have a different life to me such as he is Australian American and is adopted, and he has hEDS, which I do not have (but many of my family members do). Idk if its weird that he has a disability i dont have but he just does, thats not something i chose, he just started appearing with braces and a crutch and i was like oop- okay then 🤣 yeah anyway Harri is a cool dude idk, hes 38 and hes like my best friend. He replaced the guy from my old inner world who was called Bill (he was technically just Bill Weasley but i changed him so much he was really an OC) but then things got bad with Bill and i had to start a nuclear war in that headspace to get rid of everything a start a new world.....my brain is weird.

Anyway I love my brain, I have to be careful to make sure I dont have a repeat of the Bill situation, but I avoid it by using only OCs and changing the story often so i dont get too sucked in to anything specific and start becoming delusional and dysphoric about not being a 50 something year old ginger wizard from Ireland- yeah.....that happened. I also started having memories of things that happened to him (which was not good because he had a very violent life) and becoming triggered when watching HP movies because I would remember being abused by certain characters 😬

Nowadays i know how to control my mind better so it stays safe most of the time! But yes that is my brain and my innerworld lmao, feel free to share your own experiences (both singlets and systems!!)!

Also bonus fact: my innerworld was actually my special interest for about 3 years? It was hard to explain so i said my spin was harry potter but it was actually my inner world that was based off of harry potter lol

[xpierce]

So question. Is we/us normal to refer to yourself as? Like we have been starting to use that more frequently mixed with normal stuff to refer to yourself as and it’s so confusing to me. Liek what does this mean????

Just asking even if it’s most likely a grammar thing even though those don’t randomly happen and have a reason behind them I can go back to.

I don’t think daydreaming or maladaptive daydreaming conversations that just start randomly should be normal. Or when writing and rereading stuff that didn’t seem right and something telling me to change it.

….I have questions

[permacosm]

Not a system

[zeros-sys]

positivity for introjects!

shout out to introjects who don't identify with their source at all

shout out to introjects who do identify with their source

shout out to introjects of people/factives

shout out to introjects of original characters/octives

shout out to introjects of objects/obtives

shout out to introjects of concepts/conceptives

shout out to introjects of other alters

shout out to introjects of the body/what the body was like before being a system

shout out to introjects of imaginary friends

shout out to introjects of paracosms/that formed from maladaptive daydreaming

shout out to introjects of "trendy/one hit wonder" media that the system isn't interested in anymore or hyperfixations

shout out to introjects who dislike being an introject due to how people have treated them for it

shout out to nonhuman introjects who are forced to be source seperated because they are in a human body

shout out to introjects of people/factives that hate/are upset about the lack of positivity for them

shout out to introjects who identify with labels that wouldn't align with their source

shout out to introjects whose source would hate them

shout out to introjects who love/obsess over their source

shout out to introjects of things that are very old or not well known/niche

shout out to introjects who hate/are apathetic to their source

shout out to introjects who don't fully consider themselves introjects

shout out to introjects with no source memories

shout out to introjects who also kin

shout out to introjects who used to think they kinned their source

shout out to introjects of people/factives that love their source

shout out to introjects of people/factives that hate their source

shout out to introjects who know nothing about their source

shout out to introjects that know everything about their source

shout out to introjects with shifting/changing source memories

shout out to introjects who forgot a lot about their source

shout out to introjects with trauma that closely resembles exotrauma

shout out to introjects who are never mentioned in fandoms

shout out to introjects who get upset at the way people "misinterpret" their source

shout out to introjects whose experiences are ignored by other systems/the cdd community

shout out introjects!

[canis-constellate]

i don't know about anyone else, but we feel... very put off by the idea that traumagenic plurality is somehow so different to other forms of plurality. in no small part because we're multi-origins. it leaves a bad taste in our mouth when folks act like traumagenic and endogenic plurality are nothing alike or only have surface-level similarities.

like, we're not going to deny that there's differences. obviously. but endogenic and traumagenic plurality aren't two completely different things. least of all are they things that don't intersect.

but then, where do neurogenic plurals fit? especially when their specific neurodiversity was caused or influenced by trauma (eg., bpd systems; our own schizophrenia has been influenced by trauma, and our plurality has been influenced by our schizophrenia)? the plurality itself might not be traumagenic technically, but the thing that caused their plurality is. do you consider them to still be endogenic because their plurality wasn't caused directly by trauma, or are they traumagenic-by-proxy because their plurality's source was (or at least was influenced by it)?

what about mixed origins collectives like us? we were born plural, median-monocon, and even if we'd never been traumatized, we believe we would have ended up partitionary regardless due to autism, ipseity disturbance from schizophrenia, immersive/maladaptive daydreaming (we kind of ride the line), accidental thoughtforms and soulbonds, etc etc. but the trauma we did end up facing shaped our plurality into a disordered and partially traumagenic kind, and we became partitionary much earlier than we otherwise would have. where do we fit in your little dichotomy? are we endogenic because we were born plural, because of our soulbonds and walk-ins, because DID didn't cause our plurality, or are we traumagenic because of how our current functioning was shaped by what we went through, because we have DID in the first place? none of our origins can be discounted from what we are, because then you just don't get the full picture.

you deprive not just yourself of community and valuable perspectives when you claim that traumagenic plurality is so wholly different from endogenic plurality, you also deprive it from others. others like us, who can't and won't and never will fit neatly into either category.

[marisol-holme]

The retired good girls guide for writing

I haven’t always been able to understand myself. 

I never felt like I was able to clock pure basic needs. Couldn’t tell if I was hungry or thirsty. I finished my meals early, preferring to always feel full, in a silent critic of my mother and father’s controlling rule over my life. A few bites of fuck you always left on the plate. I liked to see how far I could push it. How little I could drink, sleep, or eat, and still function. A true desert island scenario would see me lasting years; I had inadvertently trained myself for it. Except my desert island was more devoid of emotional fulfilment and attention. 

I had to get creative. I developed some interesting tendencies, sure. But mostly I just wanted to escape. Now my parents never went out, and my internal world was already tumultuous at best, so I did what anyone would do and read. I read voraciously. The ability to turn off my hunger had seeped into all areas of my life. A fugue state dissociation through most of my early years through to adolescence. But I was able to come alive when I was reading. When I read, it was like my first breath. Hungry. I could imagine these worlds and built them up easily, colourfully within my mind’s eye. I'd picture the strong female characters that I admired. I’d taste food, hear music. It was the only time I was ever able to really live, before I had to go downstairs and pretend to eat.

Unwittingly, my upbringing fostered just the correct environment for me to develop a writer’s hunger. Because a writer is always a reader before they grow mad to write. I grew mad fast. I had to. I had to create worlds for me to escape into, away from all the shouting and fighting. Alchemise what I’d read into something new and original. It helped that I was an avid daydreamer, although a psychiatrist might call me a maladaptive daydreamer, but it only ever occurred to me when I was bored. Parallel to this, I grew into shame, so what I wrote I would throw away. I sadly have none of my early works. They are long decomposed into sub-atomic and absorbable waste, probably seeped into a water system somewhere and live inside all of you. Yuck. Not even my best work. 

Then I grew up and I had no dreams because I was not hungry. I hadn’t picked up a book in a long time. I dabbled with things that made me feel warm. Partying and shallow conversations. Grotty pubs and sticky clubs. Good friends made me feel a good kind of warm. But it took me a long time to find my way back to literature. Through a work stint as a Nursery Practitioner, I found my way back into writing. You see, at the nursery we had to send updates to parents all about what their children were getting up to. I enjoyed this task and wrote the children’s days like stories. Descriptive and alive. I’d got the bug and the bug had bit me. I didn’t last long once I had started writing again and I quickly found myself working at the Ideas Foundation. 

Through my new employer, I was encouraged to trial as much as possible to find out what I enjoyed doing. I was also very privileged to have access to several creative professionals who genuinely wanted to help and mentor those younger than them. Mentors can see all your ducks and help you to get them in a row. My ducks were all over the place and needed very graceful guidance. You push my ducks too much and, well, they explode. Poof!

Speaking to seasoned professional copywriters, I was able to glean their persistent journey into the profession. The confusion I once had around my goals has seemed to have dissipated. The ability to feel hungry for life and understand myself has only grown. My spark is back. 

The excitement and giddiness I feel when I think about myself as a writer is immense. The energy can fuel me for days. I look to the bottom left of my documents and the number of words that can pour out onto a page grows and grows with each project I set myself. The possibilities as a writer seem endless from this perspective. 

I understand that there is a lot more to these dreams that simple want. I must be focused. Persistent. Take up the offers of guidance from those around me. Accepting critic and moving towards goals. But the potential is there. I understand myself a little better. I value my work a little more. Hopefully, one day in the not-so-distant future a book of mine might get thrown away and end up decomposing in the damp soil into tiny fragments that find their way into us. At least that work will be better and born of something other than the child’s will to survive and create. That would make me feel okay. 

[sophieinwonderland]

Answers for r/systemscringe

It seems like the subreddit is now denying the existence of imagination.

An NPC is a character in your head who you may or may not control but also isn't really a person.

You may have experienced something like this when you dream, where the other characters in the dream are completely autonomous. Although with the intelligence level of your subreddit, I wouldn't be surprised if you start claiming that dreams don't exist either.

If you were to head over to the immersive daydreaming subreddit, you would find a community that has a lot of these sorts of non-headmate characters. (And probably a few headmates that they don't realize are headmates.)

It's 2024. When are you guys going to finally learn that partial dissociative identity disorder exists? A dissociative disorder that is characterized by a lack of switching. Switching in that disorder is either rare or non-existent.

This has been in the ICD-11 since 2019. You all have had 5 years to educate yourselves!

You can't keep relying on other people to do it for you. Especially when you ban us for trying!

I'm not really sure that I understand what this user is getting at with the point about self-consciousness. I think that they are suggesting that a person who was plural wouldn't realize that they were plural because it would just be normal to them?

Which can be true if they aren't talking to people about their internal experiences, but isn't really what I'm talking about here.

When I refer to a rudimentary self-consciousness, what I am meaning is that the headmate should have its own perspectives and be able to have some awareness that those perspectives are their own and not someone else's.

The most basic version of this is an entity who could say, "I like x where you like y" to the host. This involves an implicit acknowledgment of separation. Whether the headmate is calling itself a person or a part or a spirit or something entirely different, it is aware of its own wants and desires, and that those wants and desires aren't necessarily shared by everyone in the system.

This basic level of self-consciousness isn't indicative of a headmate on its own though. Dream characters may also demonstrate this basic sort of self-consciousness. So can some daydream characters.

And lines can get blurry quickly if you have a system who is in an inner world together which is sort of like a shared daydream. Not everything that can talk in the inner world is going to be a full headmate. Some are going to be like the daydream characters of singlets. These are what we call NPCs.

Super important reminder that immersive daydreaming exists without being maladaptive!

Systems immersing themselves in the inner world can be healthy because it can allow them to develop stronger bonds with each other and lower dissociative barriers.

And even immersive daydreaming can be healthy for singlets simply because it's fun and can relieve stress. You could say somebody sitting around daydreaming for hours is dangerous but if they enjoy it, I don't really see it being any more dangerous than playing a video game a lot or other activities that don't involve social interaction. And I think it might be far more healthy than mindlessly scrolling through YouTube shorts or TikTok while they slowly deteriorate your attention span.

Daydreaming only becomes maladaptive whenever it starts to impact your life in unhealthy ways.

This really isn't that complicated!

[queerdisabledmuslimlove]

Shout out to

LGBTQ reverts in a homophobic and islamophobic household

Aromantic allosexual Muslims

Lesbian couples who can’t decide who pays mehr /hj

Queer Muslims who have cried to Allah SWT, begging for forgiveness for being queer

Queer Muslims who tried to “pray the gay away”

Transmasc Muslims who still wear their hijab and transfems who can’t wear hijab

Genderqueer and multigender folks who can’t decide if they should wear a hijab or not

neurodivergent Muslims

Muslims who can’t recite prayer in arabic because of neurodivergence

Muslims who are in DID/OSDD systems

Muslim system who feels guilt when a non muslim alter fronts

Muslim alters in non Muslim systems and vice versa, that’s probably pretty rough :(

Muslims who forget prayer because of amnesia

Muslims who forget prayer due to Maladaptive Daydreaming Disorder

Muslims with invisible disabilities that prevent them from prayer

Muslims who can’t fast during Ramadan for any reason

Poor Muslims

White and Black Muslims

Arabs who have been accused of t3rrorism

Any Muslim who have been accused of t3rrorism

Muslims with addictions

Muslims who are therians, otherkin, or nonhuman in anyway

Muslims reverts who aren’t sure if they can still identify as a therian, otherkin, or nonhuman

Hijabi quadrobists

Hijabi cosplayers. Your hijab looks great

And anyone who feels they don’t fit into the community. You are loved, I promise. There’s people out there for you 🤍

[rainberry-stardust]

reveromantigenic

(rev-er-rom-an-ti-genic)

a -genic term for systems or alters who formed as a result of daydreaming about a romantic fictional ship or romantic relationship. this could be intentionally or unintentionally.

the name is inspired by the word 'reverie' (meaning daydream), and 'romantic' of course relating to relationships.

i coined this for myself because i have alters who formed specifically as a result of my habit of daydreaming about my OTPs to fall asleep (or as a form of maladaptive escapism in my childhood)

[the-moonjay-forest-system]

Rating plushie dreadfuls plushies

Part one: The ones we have:

Dissociative identity disorder

Our rating: 8/10

•The first member of our collection, a Christmas gift from my qpp. It being a gift from somebody to show support of our system definitely adds even more value to it for me.

•their name is Astaroth btw

• so soft!!!

•I like how their colour pallete is likely inspired from the DID flag (the white, orange and black one)

•the bunnies in the ear is, in my opinion, a great way to portray alters in the design! While being seperate in a way they all belong to the same vessel. I personally prefer this over to it like having two heads or a half and half kind of thing (like having two seperate expressions on it's face or being split with two colours)

•the face is perfect, I think it displays dissociation beautifully.

•I don't know exactly what the rabbit shape on the forehead represents but it looks nice. I'm also not overly familiar with the symbols on the belly.

•it is a bit on the plainer side compared to some of the other plushies, it doesn't bother me too much though. But perhaps it could be made better with some more details.

Maladaptive daydreaming

Our rating: 10/10

•one of (if not) our favourite buns from plushy dreadfuls. Bought it for ourselves when it was on sale I think? We still haven't settled on a name for them so if you have any suggestions please share!

•The colours!!! Omg they are the epitome of daydreaming and I love how (at least I think) each maladaptive daydreaming bunny will look slightly different, ours has a mostly blue and green belly compared to the yellow shown above.

•the stars in the ears are also such a lovely touch and gives the bunny "space cadet" vibes. I also like the sleep mask and how it looks literally sewn onto the face which portrays how hard it is to get out of or stop a daydream when you struggle with maladaptive daydreaming.

•I don't know what the symbols on the feet and belly mean, I'm sure I can find them somewhere maybe even the official site but I am indeed lazy. Same with the purple bands on the hands and feet..maybe they're supposed to be like restraints trapping us in our daydreams??

•on several reviews I've seen people mention not partocularly liking the texture of the bunny, it does have a rougher, less soft slightly scratchy texture so I thought I'd mention it here. Personally I don't find it too bothering but I get why others might. The feet and tail are soft though.

Cancer ♋ (zodiac sign)

Our rating: 9/10

•this is actually a birthday present for our younger brother who loved the two Buns we have so we decided to get him his own. It arrived a few days ago and we've only briefly looked at it to check it was in good condition but omg it's so cute and so soft!!

•while not being my favourite colours I can't freaking resist a pink and blue colour combo they just belong together.

•just look at the crab, need I say more? I love when the plushies come with other plushies.

•I might have to steal it from him after his birthday/j

•you can't see them but on the back of the ears there are crescent moons

•it's the softets thing ever!!!! Like heavenly soft!

Part two will be the ones we want/apply to us which will be much longer since there's a lot. Feel free to use this idea and rate your own if you'd like

[thebearme]

Here's my Parappa hcs and reimagine ideas for Matt & Paula

Sunny

Sunny is a cosmo flower like her mother.

Because of her mother's recent death, her dad Potter became UBER PROTECTIVE. The classic "ur the last thing of her, I have to protect you" you know.

Unrelated thing but idk when I'll ever talk about this guy but Potter HAS to be half object head, the only plant thing apart of him is his hair. idk maybe yall can figure it out... also i think he gave birth to sunny and no i will not elaborate.

Sunny is asexual and intersex but what do you expect, she's a plant.

She got all her arm strength from her dad. All those home military drills really helped.

She's superb at skateboarding but tends to not do so beings she doesn't want to get her dress ruin. But give her time to change, and she'll start shreddin.

Sunny has Bipolar disorder type 1.

Sunny grew up a lil sheltered. She lives in the middle of the woods and only goes into town for groceries! She started going out more and more when she started school for the first time, especially after she got some friends.

I'm taking this headcanon from the fic life in parappa town and expanding it but Sunny is in this plant belief system where you stay loyal to Mothernature and when you die you'll become a part of her. She doesn't eat meat, she gives back to nature and be kind to all Mothernature's creatures.

Sunny take cares and own her mother's "small" farm. She used to give her produce to the community for free, but because of the government finding out about that, she had to put it on pause. She either sells it for big money, or the government will take her land and profit from it them self.

Parappa

Parappa is his rap name. His name is Pa and his nickname is Pappy.

He's a bagel and hound mix, but has more bagel dog tendencies.

He's hat was bought by his mom before she left.

Parappa's mom divorce her husband after one too many financial crises, just when Parappa was just graduated high school. (explaining the past tense in PtR2) Leaving Pappy with Papa Rappa while she takes care of Pinto herself.

His Mama always encouraged Parappa to reach his dreams as long it wasn't expensive. So after everything, Parappa was more determined than ever to believe in himself and never give up.

Parappa would do anything for Sunny, he would kill Joe Chin even!

After a while working at the videogame shop, Parappa will later work for Master Onion cuz at least he pays him.

Parappa has the n card cuz he's cool like that. im tired of hearing 'who gave him the n card?' well maybe he just born with it. stop judging my dog bro

Parappa's rapping career just recently started. He began rapping his poems by the end of high school, luckily for him his best friend has connections to get him up there.

He grew up with classic 80s-90s rap. Pappy is an oldhead.

Pappy is anti-drug, anti-gun rights and a BIG ACAB. He is a huge believer that 'only community can fix the issues and not some cops that with guns trying to make the problem worst' but if you listen to parappa's album you've probly already saw this coming.

He still an up-and-coming artist, eventho he's known around the town and performed with Club fun's mc twice... he just started selling his first album.

Pappy is pretty smart and could have got into a science major like his dad but choose music instead. His father wept.

Parappa guessed that Katy is lesbian years before she started dating Lammy because the god awful dates she would go on.

Parappa loves frogs, they're his favorite animal.

He has a concentration issue, dude can't stay on track for the life of him. And no he doesn't know he has ADHD.

His ass has maladaptive daydreamer.

Boxy boy was made for Parappa by his dad because of tendency to daydream everywhere and anywhere, he gives him sense.

Pappy has a stuttering and lisp problem, but it adds an interesting element to his raps.

Pappy can NOT keep a secret. He WILL tell Sunny!

He got orange hair

Pj

Pj or further known as King Berri is still the same as always, maybe a lil more tired.

He uses king as a stage name so he can have a bit of his fantasy come true.

Eats weed brownie everyday.

Pj now wears a hooding for pure comforter, it like wearing sleepingbag at all times.

Pj seems very comfortable with his life but he really just compliant.

Pj is estranged from his family. They have not talked in years and he doesn't plan on changing that.

Just like everyone, Pj doesn't hate being a dj but just hate working. All the fun he had for his craft was gone a long time ago. But if he still gets paid by his boss MC Mushi and gets his 'stuff' then his fine.

Pj is brutally honest to Parappa like always, someone got to be the straight man in the friendship.

He's the most likely in the friendship to get the other in trouble.

Pj lives in the college housing, particularly in the basement. He just likes it down there. But funny enough, it turns out the house doesn't stay as empty as what the staff said it would be.

He's roommate is Matt. He's not that bad when you get to know him, He's just a bit snobby, know-it-all and WAY to competitive... but chill? Ok he's a Chin but hey, atleast he's better then Joe.

Him and Matt met one rainy day when the power went out and Matt got jumpedscared but the bear in the basement.

Katy

Chatty Katty was her nickname back in high school and even in the college campus right now. She gets this nickname not because she talks bad of anyone, honestly the opposite. She talks up everyone she knows! Right after talking up herself.

Katy was a church goer growing up, so no duh she'll know everyone in the community.

Her and Pappy were in the church choir growing up, that's how they met. Later she got introduced Pj in school, the three of them started hanging out after that.

Parappa gives the biggest little brother vibe to Katy.

Katy has the vocabulary of a old lady and it's because of the older lady she works with at the diner.

Katy is that friend that went on so many bad dates, tells you about and it makes you think HOW the hell are you still dating men??

She met Lammy after running into each other from the college lecture hall. And she immediately invited her to the milkcan band practice.

Lammy and Katy were a will-they-won't-they thing then they met. Lammy likes Katy but doesn't think she would like her, Katy likes Lammy but doesn't think she's likes women so she continues going for men.

Katy has been going to church less as she goes into college, jobs, dates, band practice and battling the gay thoughts. oooo scary

Katy and Sunny met in middle school, Katy never liked the idea of girls tearing each other down. And Katy was right, Sunny was sweet as she thought.

Katy introduced Sunny to the boys and everyone went nicely, they shared lunch together.

Paula

Paula is base off a kit fox, she just put makeup over her facial mark.

She's got abit of rewrite; She's from a new money household but unlike her parents that fell into complete greed, She's still her old self.

Paula is a tomboy at heart and her true love is basketball and women.

She's a business major oooo. AND the captain of the basketball team.

She still beefing with Katy but you know- it's a friendly rivalry. Or at least it becomes one.

Paula has a little crush on Sunny after meeting her but she's very respectful about it and very real told anyone about it... besides Katy... who told Pj... who told Matt... who told Parappa... who told Sunny. But otherwise Paula got turned down rather nicely and took it well.

Matt

Matt and Joe are doodles, partially a cockapoo.

He is the younger brother of Joe Chin and makes it his LIFE GOAL to be Parappa's rival.

He bascally bradley for the extremely goofy movie.

Matt has a big gay crush on Pappy but he refuse to admit!

Joe Chin got to inherit the family business without even doing anything and Matt is really mad about that. So he's in school for a business degree and in the frat club for extra bonus points. All to impress his parents and get the family business instead.

Ok not related to Matt hcs but just one thing- I think Joe Chin is a womanizer manipulative creep! That's why Matt is a funny villain while Joe is a flatout villain villain.

There more hcs in the bottom but I didn't feel comfortable putting up with more of the light hearted stuff so...

darker things below, read with caution.

[sysmedsaresexist]

I do not mean to sound stupid, but I read your post "dissociation is not solely trauma-based", and I was wondering if you knew of any sources or books about it? I think I don't fully understand what dissociation is. For exemple, no matter how I look at it, I don't understand how meditation could be considered like anything close to dissociation, simply because it's also used as a grounding technique.

I'm combining two asks here, because I'm going to cover both in one go :) you don't sound stupid.

You've got to start with the understanding that dissociation is a continuum from normal (aka nonpathological) to "abnormal" (I hate that word, but aka pathological). I finally dropped the wild existence of Dr Jamie Marich, clinical trauma specialist and a pro endo, CDD system, who wrote Dissociation Made Simple. Let me quote because the book is actually good.

Yes, dissociation is so hard to understand that she wrote an entire book about the concept.

"The English word dissociation comes from the Latin root dissociātiō, meaning “to sever” or “to separate.” At this point when lecturing, I usually ask my students: What are we severing or separating from when we dissociate? You may take a moment, before reading on, to ask this question of yourself. Try not to think on it too rationally. Listen to your gut-level response...

For the purposes of this opening chapter, let’s focus on the form of separation that every human being can likely relate to —severing or separating from the present moment—especially when the present moment becomes unpleasant, overwhelming, or otherwise painful."

Dissociation is a disconnect from something-- this can be memories, thoughts, emotions, or, in worst cases, reality. The present moment.

Not all meditation is dissociative, but most is. For example, emptiness meditation is about disconnecting from everything in the moment. You are literally fine-tuning your dissociative techniques. This is also true when you're using grounding meditation to disconnect from overwhelming emotions or thoughts to get back into the moment.

There are a variety of tasks that we either develop naturally or learn as a way to achieve some degree of separation (e.g., enough to stay somewhat present but still get some relief, or going further into totally cutting oneself off from in-the-moment presence). Dissociation of this nature is not all or nothing—it generally happens in degrees and can depend upon how much distress you feel in any given context. We can do this by daydreaming, drifting off, zoning out, zoning inward, disengaging eye contact with people, losing focus (especially when driving), or getting a little floaty in many other life circumstances. Some people frame this “floatiness” as similar to hypnotic trance and others feel it is quite distinct. We may even take deliberate steps to enhance the experience of separation. How often have you escaped into a book or a movie, into your phone or computer, or into some activity, because it makes the harshness of dealing with the present moment and the emotions it can elicit somewhat more bearable?

Let me be very clear, if you said yes to this question, this answer does not mean that there is anything wrong with you! All of these can be quite ordinary forms of dissociation that every human being is capable of experiencing.

A really, really good way to understand this concept is actually through maladaptive daydreaming (MADD), a highly addictive form of dissociation.

Indeed for many of us, substances or other behaviors that cause major surges of dopamine (e.g., spending, computer games, sexually acting out) can become the accelerant of dissociation...

Whenever we become accustomed to dissociating, especially as children growing up in complex trauma, our brain becomes bonded or some would even say addicted to that state of escape. Once chemical or other reinforcing behaviors are introduced to us, they can accelerate that already familiar experience and we become further bonded to that behavior.

Daydreaming itself is dissociative. Point blank. It is both the most normal kind of dissociation, and yet the most common maladaptive dissociation.

Daydreaming and journeying into my head’s imaginative scenarios is another series of behaviors that can have both adaptive and maladaptive qualities. As a kid, they kept me safe. As an adult, they are the source of so much of my creative power—yet if I engage them too long, too hard, or too much, I run the risk of getting lost and not being able to attend to what helping professionals might call my activities of daily living (e.g., eating properly, sleeping, taking good care of myself, getting to work, attending to loved ones appropriately and with good boundaries).

Let's cut away from the book really quickly to look at Eli Somer, the guy who came up with MADD.

Maladaptive daydreaming is a dissociative disorder: Supporting evidence and theory.

The only real thing I want to quote is:

Although trauma may be one causal factor, we indicate several other etiological pathways to the development of MD. We discuss associations with related concepts and suggest directions for future research.

And

MD is strongly related to dissociation and seems to rely on an innate tendency for absorptive and imaginative fantasy. Through its rewarding properties, this form of immersive daydreaming becomes abnormal. MD may thus be viewed as a disordered form of dissociative absorption.

While Somer talks about how it can be a behavioral addiction in that paper, I find this is a more succinct description.

Maladaptive Daydreaming: Epidemiological Data on a Newly Identified Syndrome

Maladaptive Daydreaming (MD) is a proposed mental disorder characterized by excessive, compulsive immersion in vivid and complex fantastical daydreamed plots, generating intense emotional involvement, often accompanied by stereotypical movements. This addictive absorption in daydreaming becomes maladaptive as it consumes many hours a day, generates shame or guilt, hinders achievement of short- and long-term goals or tasks, and overall causes clinically significant distress and/or interferes with functioning in social or occupational realms. Maladaptive Daydreamers (MDers) report a strong urge to daydream whenever they can and annoyance whenever they cannot, and, repeated unsuccessful efforts to control, cut back, or stop daydreaming, like other behavioral addictions.

And that's the best way to look at DID and other maladaptive, pathological forms of dissociation. It's a behavioral addiction, an escape that we not only crave, but can no longer live without. Just like you can get addicted to working out and gambling, you can become addicted to severing ties with reality through pleasurable (and in some cases, necessary) forms of escape.

I don't know if this is going to make sense, but I've found looking at dissociation like an upside-down iceberg helps me.

At the top, the widest part, is everyone on the planet, and the basic, general concept of dissociation. Severing from the present moment, be it through your phone, book, daydreaming, meditation, zoning out.

As you go down, and it gets narrower, it becomes more important to put names to specific types and forms of dissociation, and fewer people struggle with these forms. In the middle is a confusing mix of seemingly normal and pathological dissociation. You have mediumship, authors with living characters, OCD (yup), ADHD (shocking, I know), MADD, DPDR, (C)PTSD, people on the edge of forming behavioral addictions.

At the bottom, the smallest point, only pathological dissociation, with a much smaller population experiencing it. DID, OSDD, severe and chronic DPDR, DA.

For people that struggle with dissociation... they fell down a hole and travelled all the way to the bottom of the iceberg. What was once a general, normal, human experience became a very specific problem. Over the years, as they travelled deeper, they used and developed a complex mix of various normal dissociative reactions until it eventually became a named, pathological experience.

I sincerely hope that this helps explain and answers both questions ):

Here's another really interesting paper (from none other than, DUNDUNDUN, Colin Ross).

Maladaptive Daydreaming, Dissociation, and the Dissociative Disorders

[indigochromatic]

hi. this may seem out of left field, but is there any research on how OCD, Autism, CPTSD, and plurality can mix together? yes, all of them/any combination of them, because we *think* our plurality began due to our OCD spawning someone and it cascaded from there, and we'd like to know if anyone else has had similar experiences, or knows anything about it. a caveat being we aren't diagnosed with DID, and covid recently burnt out our headspace and internal communication. maybe you can find something we can't? we dunno

Hey there! Damn, that sounds rough, I'm sorry. Short answer is yeah, absolutely, this stuff can all be connected for sure.

-> CPTSD and plurality of course have a pretty robust, well-established connection--not in the sense that they only ever go together, but that it's very common for plurality to exist and/or arise in concert with chronic trauma and hardship. Chronic adverse environments promote chronic dissociation, which is a well-studied risk factor/predisposing factor to developing dissociative plurality (and actually probably any plurality, based on anecdotal conversations with some intentionally-created system friends who have noticed that folks in their communities with more dissociative tendencies often tend to find the process of creating headmates to be easier). In most cases, studies on this stuff are looking at the relationships between DID and CPTSD, but a system doesn't have to have a DID diagnosis to be experiencing dissociative aspects to their plurality, especially in cases where they also have CPTSD and/or a history of chronic difficult life experiences.

-> Autism is unfortunately a very strong predictor for trauma, definitely because of ableism and the chronic struggles of living in an overstimulating and allistic-centered environment/society, but/and also because there's some research indicating that the neurology of autism itself makes a brain more likely to utilize trauma-response pathways: (this is a post we made talking about one of those papers, with a link to a news article about the paper). Also, and this is closer to an armchair theory of ours, but there are traits that tend to be more common in autistic folks that seem likely to be non-trauma-related additional predisposing factors for plurality--stuff like personification synesthesia (link and link), object personification (link and link), and mirroring-of-others tendencies that can look a lot like "temporary introjection"

-> We're less familiar on the research between OCD and CPTSD, autism and/or plurality--but one thing to note is that OCD itself can be a very traumatizing experience just innately, especially living with the disorder for many years. Also, the inverse is true: pwOCD are more likely than average to have experienced adverse and/or traumatic events (link and link). Autism and OCD are often comorbid (link and link). Also, and this was new to us to read, but apparently OCD is often linked to dissociative experiences, and some researchers have theorized relationships between OCD and maladaptive daydreaming (which is often considered to be on a spectrum with dissociative disorders like DID/OSDD, as well as sometimes co-occurring with them) Also, @curiousitycollective has a bunch of great posts detailing their experience with OCD + schizo-spectrum stuff + systemhood (hey! hope you don't mind the shoutout, lmk if you'd prefer I deleted the direct ping and I'll do it)

Hope this is helpful? What you're describing sounds super in line with what we've heard other systems talk about, just anecdotally. And plurality pretty much always has a way of becoming intertwined in various ways with whatever else your brain's got going on.

If you have more questions, or if you're looking for something more specific, lmk and we'll see what we can do. <3

-S

[system-of-a-feather]

Honestly, real talk, I feel like people largely do not understand just how much characters within those who are maladaptive daydreamers and/or were maladaptive daydreamers literally are "parts of them" and how both healing and destructive that dynamic can be and I find that a bit visible with how people in DID communities talk about maladaptive daydreaming as a "form of plurality"

Its an absolutely different experience but that doesn't mean that the label of "plural" isn't equally suitable. Since that topic has come up on our radar like way back half a year or year ago, we honestly have been thinking about it as someone who is considered "recovered" from DID and has recovered from maladaptive daydreaming but still has a brain that functions creativity and imaginative worlds with the same semi-autonomous functions whether I like it or not

And honestly? My characters are very much not "my creation", nor are they "just my OCs" - the very way all of my character are made and at this point the only way I know how to write and make characters is by taking a part or aspect of myself (conscious or subconscious) and throwing it out there with a name and face. That part of myself engages with the world I created and develops within the narrative and impacts the world itself.

I repeat and do this for all my characters and the world that I have created serves as a hypothetical exploratory way to understand, engage with, and explore very complex topics with exaggerated and isolated parts of myself. I have never really "planned" a character of given them traits or really anything other than a basic premise of a name, MAYBE a gender, and a vague role and I let them define their own story. No real character arc planning. No real likes and dislikes. No real narrative or secret message.

The function and means of which that I "created" these OCs and the level of which I don't control the way they form and grow is extremely similar to how I "create" alters, albeit one is far more voluntary and intentional than the other and one is physically sharing my life with me and the other is sharing a mental world with me.

((Additionally I don't engage in the mental world I made for them beyond the half joke that I'm the god of the gods of that world and they dont know))

The dynamics I have with my characters is WAY WAY WAY different than my parts / alters but BOTH my characters (maladaptive daydreaming) and my alters (DID) are equally fair to call "parts of me" and "parts of a whole" in a very literal not "Oh yeah Im a writer and this character means a lot to me theyre a part of me"

With my writing partner (who does this as well) we regularly use our characters as well to explain what we are going through / how we are feeling to help facilitate real talk and venting a lot because we have a mutual understanding that while this is a story and these are our characters, both of us have "built" this world by literally giving very specific aspects of ourselves the ability to explore, grow, and learn in a world and that while some have grown SO far from who we are now, they represent an aspect and potential part of us that could have been should something have gone one way in a specifically extreme way in a specific environment.

With that in mind, I absolutely feel its fair to compare DID and MaDD "plurality" with some obvious understanding that while there are similarities they are also different (AND THATS OK).

Cause honestly? If I actually talked to my characters (like a lot of people with MaDD tend to do) I could see myself calling and feeling as though they were a system and I don't think it would be all that inaccurate and wrong. I don't have that experience as my MADD and DID are mostly entirely two seperate dissociative coping mechanisms, but I know for a fact the line between the two is a lot less clear and its just food for thought

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[SYSCOURSE AND DEBATE WILL BE BLOCKED.]

[Good faith conversation and discussion is WELCOMED and ENCOURAGED.]

[If you don't know the difference, don't add on.]

[steaming-system-takes]

While yes, the innerworld is not necessarily real, it's a very good tool for contextualizing what's going on with your system. It's a lot easier for me to tell who's in front with me if I look into my innerworld, and actions that occur in the innerworld help me understand my own mental state

It can be used as a form of maladaptive daydreaming, yes, but as long as it does not interfere with mental health, it's a good tool in my opinion

^