#source the golden girls

[19panophobia16]

Lilia: "Look, you didn't ask me for my opinion, but I'm old, so I'm giving it anyway."

[incorrectquotesmcu]

Tony: I'm a Stark, flirting is part of my heritage.

Clint: What does that mean?

Natasha: His father was a slut too.

[dcvidsrossi]

Rossi: Well, I can't help it! I'm Italian! Flirting is part of my heritage!

Reid: What does that mean?

Emily, passing by with a cup of coffee: It means his father was a slut too.

[gardentool]

Gojo: Y/N, guess who’s here!

Y/N: My date?

Gojo: Your husband!

Y/N: I don’t have a husband, call the police.

[Geto walks into the room]

Geto: Your ex-husband.

Y/N: I’ll call the police.

[thealtoduck]

*Alfred is invited to go out partying*

Alfred: Uh, no! I can’t see myself swinging my hips and wildly gyrating my pelvis. I am not interested.

BatCat!Bro: And the world takes a collective sigh of relief.

[lizzieandersoncore]

*Charlie on his way out for a date*

Cameron : Remember , don’t do anything I wouldn’t do.

Charlie : I think I crossed that line when I got a date.

[incorrect-bridgerton-family]

Phillipa: Can I ask a dumb question?

Penelope: Better than anyone I know.

[terry-perry]

Clara: Y/N, guess who’s here.

Y/N Carmine: My client!

Odette: Your boyfriend.

Y/N Carmine: I don’t have a boyfriend. Call the police.

*Alastor invites himself in*

Alastor: Your ex-boyfriend.

Y/N Carmine: I’ll call the police 😒

[raphael-angele]

Mini Series of Bianca di Angelo being Persassy 2.0

Thalia: Can't believe you used to have a crush on Luke

Bianca: Ew

Annabeth: Oh, shut up. I was a kid. I didn't care if he was a year or two older

Thalia:

Bianca: In what, Annabeth, dog years?

[fangirling-tussisque-noncaelatur]

Iceman: Well, how was the trip?

Rooster: I tell you, that Disney World hotel was just wonderful. It had everything. Good service, delicious food, a beautiful room.

Maverick: What did you think of the rides?

Rooster: ...They got rides?

Hangman: Don't worry about it.

Hangman: *winks* You had a great time and you never had to stand in line.

Rooster: *blushes hard*

Maverick and Iceman: *grimace*

[daemon-is-perfectly-unhinged]

Rhaegar: Where are we going?

Jon: To either get ice-cream or commit a felony. We'll decide on the way.

[19panophobia16]

Agatha: "Isn't it amazing how I can feel so bad, but still look so good?"

[incorrectquotesmcu]

[Y/N is in prison and Yelena has to bail them out]

Y/N: Yelena! Thank god you’re here!

Yelena: Arrested for prostitution! I can’t believe it!

Y/N: Yelena, I'm innocent!

Yelena: I know that. I just can’t believe those dumb cops think anyone would pay money to sleep with you.

[dcvidsrossi]

Emily: Hey, Luke. We brought dinner.

Luke: What'd you get?

Tara: [gestures with the pizza box] A box of chicken. I hope you like it extra flat and crispy.

[teenwolfpackincorrectcaptions]

Stiles: All you ever do is talk about your sexual problems! Well, what about my sexual problem? Scott: What is your sexual problem? Stiles: I’m not getting any!

[danganronpafakes]

Angie: I treat my body like a temple. Miu: Yeah, open to everyone, day or night.

Source: The Golden Girls ("Flu Attack")