#sorry if this is rambly and disconnected

[alchely]

I think we all fundamentally take Ian and Mickey's final episode in S2 wrong...

If we just take the "warm mouth" scene alone at face value then sure, Mickey is absolutely being deliberately cruel to Ian.

But let's look at how Ian takes it in the wake of that exchange, he talks about it only once in the next few episodes, and he says to Mandy that "Mickey thinks I pussied out" [on killing Frank] and he thinks he 'kinda' did.

This is Ian and Mickey soulmatism "we just get each other on a molecular level", so their thought process is somewhat inscrutable to us on the outside, but I think, in a way, that Mickey was already pretty serious about his relationship with Ian in season 2 and seeing Ian not willing to "fight" for them to be together felt like the ultimate betrayal.

Let's not forget that in that initial scene right after Frank discovered them Mickey was talking in plural, 'we do this, we do that'.

Seeing Ian refusing to help him the way he needed to be helped was definitely something that hit Mickey hard and caused him to lash out.

And it's not like Ian wasn't trying in his way! He was going through what he thought was the safest route to keep Mickey around cause he also cares a great deal about his not-boyfriend (let's not forget that the point of not killing Frank isn't that he turns his nose up at patricide but that he didn't want Mickey to go to juvie).

By misunderstanding his actions and not giving him time to explain Mickey jumps the gun and says what he says, and he's only able to see reason months later when nothing happens from the safety of prison.

There's obviously that other layer to the conversation, that Ian fundamentally doesn't understand the severity of the risk for Mickey and just how afraid he is ('we've got nothing to be ashamed of' 'what fucking world do you live in') because their families are so different, which will bite him in the ass later.

Mickey coming back to Ian in S3 the way he did, I know some people found it weird that Ian was immediately on board when their last interaction was what it was (cause we're fixated on the "you're nothing but a warm mouth"), but what they don't get is that this is Mickey forgiving Ian and giving him another chance, not the other way around.

Edit: I also don't think that that whole situation was swept under the rug either, Mickey learns pretty quickly that Ian isn't at his beck and call anymore at the beginning of S3, despite what their initial reunion suggests, that he's got "options" (yes Ian was doing it to make him jealous, but he doesn't know that) and I think that was him learning that in S2 he had pushed Ian too far away, that his words and actions had consequences in the relationship.

[mapicccc]

"you can't complain, it's a force of nature."

kab says this, and yet, I think it is entirely what she is missing. she is trying to control balance, to control the server, while missing that this has always been up to the server. Yes, there is a large heart gap, but we can actively see players trying to overcome it and bring down those on top. that is in the nature fo the server. if one person controls it, where can conflict exist? karma's law goes against the servers way of working, and ultimately I don't think it will do much of anything.

[milolunde]

We all know Timmy is Wanda’s mama’s boy but we need to keep in mind he’s still Cosmo’s kid too and that Cosmo would love him just as vehemently as Wanda

[violetsandshrikes]

how do you help so many different kinds of people? i have noticed you know about lots of different things and meet lots of different people. i want to do that but i cant figure out how? /gen

A little bit of background is probably needed:

I have had people ask me this before, and honestly I had a little bit of a cheat code. While my life has been filled with a lot of trauma and bad shit, I was raised by a mother from an incredibly leftie family who walked the talk when it came to values and doing the work.

She had a lot of ideas imparted on us from a young age: social and community responsibility, ideas of collectivism, eduction. Even as a poor, trapped young mother, she was believed that many people behaved badly based on ignorance outside their very limited bubble, and that when life became difficult economically or socially, people would immediately point fingers at groups they knew little about or saw as distinctively different in order to have a blameable target.

From about 4-5, outside typical schoolwork, my mother also taught us about the world. This included different conflicts and genocides (which may sound horrific to some people, but basic information and explanation was given, and then it got more in depth with age), different countries and cultures (often she would randomly select a country from a world map, and we would spend a set amount of time learning everything we could about the place, culture, people, etc), different religions (I attended many different types of religious institutes at least once, and my mother often found people willing to talk about their belief system with us), volunteering, etc.

I have definitely had a head start and a lot more guidance than many people, which I am incredibly grateful for. It can also make it difficult to advise though.

Realistically:

Honestly, the two best things you can do if you don’t know where to start are: listen and learn. Find any local group, start participating and volunteering. Listen to the stories of people there. Ask questions. Expose yourself to all sorts of different ideas and opinions.

In the last year, I’ve started doing a little throwback to my childhood. I have a schoolbook, and I choose random topics, and spend a few hours every week learning basic things about it. Choose a country, choose a place, a time in history, a religion, a culture, a people. You don’t have to be a scholar. You just have to expand your horizons.

As you get involved with more things, you will begin to narrow down your core values. This is good: you can’t do everything at once. I would say roughly 2-3 core issues or topics you care about is good (this doesn’t mean that you don’t care about things happening outside it - it just means you don’t spread yourself thin). There’s different things people make their focus: LGBTQ+ issues, BIPOC issues, environmental issues, homelessness, disability, refugee issues, etc. Your core focus will be the ones you feel most passionate about, which is good, because it means you will put in genuine work and care, and you will lower the risk of burning out fast and being of help to no one, including yourself.

You also have to get comfortable with the fact you will never be perfect. You will never be up to date with every idea and practice. There is always something you will need to learn or unlearn. Becoming rigid about being correct all the time will make you more of a menace than a help to any reputable movement or group. You might feel uncomfortable when you realise the gap or misunderstanding you had - that’s normal. Be open to learning and expanding your understanding of things vs burying your head in the stand stubbornly. I say things and then months later I realise that actually, I don’t agree with that anymore, or my understanding has deepened, or changed, or pivoted. This tends to make people feel very bad or uncomfortable, but you have to get to the stage where again, you acknowledge that that’s normal.

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

have i mentioned how great cats are. there's a lil guy in my house and when i lay my head on her side she starts purring so hard <3 and ten seconds later she will try to open my wrist with her teeth <3 truly the best <3

[sorikufeels]

https://www.tumblr.com/pondrea/748403783611105280/dont-you-recognise-me

amazing art by pondrea (link above!!!) got me feeling things (the art is so good op!!!!!! 💚) and now i need to yap about this scene lol it’s of the moment zexion disguised himself as sora to riku in com.

(i hope it’s ok to post the link here! let me know if not!)

i’m CONVINCED what zexion said to riku as sora this still haunts riku to this day. it wasn’t even sora who said all that, but i’m sure the fear of how it played out in com actually playing out with the real sora scared riku to death. the fear of this happening led to him walking away from sora first, not even giving him the chance just in case there was a repeat scenario. sure, there was a lot of self hatred and feeling like he didn’t deserve to see sora as well, but the look on riku’s face tells you that this scarred him. this was his biggest fear. he rather fade to darkness than go through this again and isn’t even willing to risk that it could go another way.

anyway, this is just context for what i actually want to talk about lmao

so this is probably one of worst moments for riku right? utterly rejected by his best friend and now that friend was willing to kill him for who he is now. and it wasn’t even real.

but you know who that was real for? sora. in hollow bastion. utterly rejected by riku. his only means of defense taken, basically left to die. and then riku fought him tooth and nail until he lost and sora let him run away.

you know who got closure for their version of this scene? riku. he got it when sora fell to the ground on his knees in the world that never was, when he said he looked everywhere for him and told him he was still riku no matter what. sora told him exactly what he needed to hear to reassure him that sora didn’t think any of things riku feared he did. sora telling him specifically that he was still riku no matter what showed riku that sora stills wants him around. even if he looks like their enemy and even if he did some real awful things, he’s still riku and that’s enough. riku as he is is enough for sora. always has been.

you know who never got anything like that? sora. in fact, the conclusion that sora found to get him through is that he’s not enough. his friends are his power. alone, he has no strength. he only made it through by relying on a complete stranger he managed to befriend. if beast wasn’t there or if he refused to go with sora, would he have survived? he had magic but that would run out eventually. would he have even made it to the room he fights riku in?

i don’t think he thinks he would’ve. in kh3, he says alone, he’s worthless. he’s held that sentiment this entire time. no one told him otherwise. (until riku’s sacrifice but it’s murky about whether sora even remembers that at this point. but even if he does, it wasn’t like the scene in the world that never was. sora was able to dictate exactly what riku needed to hear with no imminent threat and riku was not emotionally compromised like sora was in the keyblade graveyard. riku was able to process everything sora said. that is a far cry to sora screaming in agony over all his friends dying, sora believing wholeheartedly that he's nothing without them, and riku just saying he believes in him. sure, thats what sora needed in that moment to save everyone, but it's not a response to his fears and insecurities established in kh1 like how what sora says to riku is a response to his fears and insecurities established in com.)

at this point, i think it’s obvious that sora knows riku’s changed from kh1 and that he doesn’t believe the same things. sora knows he cares based on his actions and how he saved him too and we know as an audience how dedicated he is to him. but it fucks me up to think that riku got that verbal closure while sora never did. that riku got to start healing from that awful moment but sora really never did.

just,,,, please please please please let them talk about what happened in kh1 i am on my knees begging

extra thoughts: didn’t think of this at first so sorry it’s a little disconnected, but maybe the reason riku is so horrified in that moment in com is because he realizes this is what he put sora through. maybe he made this connection himself and feeling what it was like to be on the other side of it, on sora’s side, horrified him. what’s worse, in riku’s mind, is that riku deserves to be in this position and deserves to be rejected due to his past actions. but sora never deserved it. maybe that contributed to why the self loathing spiral got worse after com.

[crybaby-bkg]

I started crocheting my first blanket today and my hand hurts so unbelievably bad and I’m not even a quarter done with it 🫡🫡

[compressedrage]

Hey y'all remember that series that kind of happened a few months ago where I was rewatching AvAM and giving my thoughts and such?

Well it's back. Hi :)

The last one of these I did was Monster School, wow. In May, good grief. Okay here we go–

The Raid: Episode 29.

This episode is awesome because we get to see Yellow and Blue! The beloveds! I have feelings about them and love them very much!

I've talked about this before, but they are so ready to help. They just escaped death by disintegration and gained an immensely powerful block, only to be met with more danger. Instead of turning around and escaping a different way, they get captured and decide to help. They're so selfless.

I love how when Yellow gets dragged off to make his own command staff Blue balks for a moment, before jumping in and taking charge. He immediately sets them up for success the best he can– crafting weapons, sending the villagers out to mine for resources, and even training the villagers who wished to defend their village. He's actually a really good coordinator. I'm so proud of him.

Here's the thing: often scientists/inventors in stories either don't believe in magic or are skeptical of its usefulness. Yellow, however, is not. His reaction to the cleric enchanting the staff is one of pure awe. He wields it with reverence and respect.

(side note: do you think those effects he gave to the three villagers ever wore off? they didn't seem to be on a timer after all...)

The integration of the Titan Ravager is genius, let me talk about it for a minute. Not only is its design amazing, but it serves as a parallel to King. Dead loved one(s) resulting in fear/bitterness, and then leading to seeking revenge. Someone help me.

[pxme-granate]

wait please share your favourite nevermoor fics 🙏. also what fics do you want to see more of in the fandom?

oo I can't believe I never answered this! Tumblr is being so weird about my asks lately

here are a couple:

at least it comes with dental—magnuschases

forgiveness (nothing to forgive)—magnuschases

^^those two have outsider povs which I am so weak for

so let's raise a cup ('cause i found someone to carry me home)—vaythefae

^^vampire au that I am OBSESSED with. like it is so interesting and well written and I wish there was more 🙈

In Your Corner—ElysianWayfarer

^^I really like the way the Crow siblings are written here, and oracle Wolfram?? presumably knackless Gumtram?? SO cool

The monsters gone, he’s on the run (and your dad is here)—krowtenretsnom

^^wah...crying over this one lol

there's more but I'm stopping there 👀

I love the family aspect of Nevermoor so. much. I wanna see more found family fluff obviously but also the messy dynamic Mog could have with her bio family and Mog being adopted into Hawthorne's whole family and the missing family dynamic that could've been between wundersmiths...also Lam and her family? Being forced to leave them behind?? (I think it parallels Mog and Ezra so. interestingly and it makes me ill lol) Francis and his aunt?? Thaddea and her clan's legacy?? ANAH. I NEED ANAH LORE BADLY. there's so much I think could be explored in fic ahhh

[ollierachnid]

I just know they cannot stand each other

[celestialrealms]

from barbatos’s 20 intimacy phone call

i feel like this more or less confirms diavolo was quite young when he “convinced” barbatos to become his butler. (i feel a bit vindicated by the fact that diabarb has always been a squick of mine lmao) 

anyway so ignoring the context of this call (which SHOULD have been longer!! justice for barbatos!!) time to ramble about their relationship for a second hfdjfdhdf

i’m honestly kind of emotional about the fact that while, yes diavolo is a demon and does demonic things... both the narrative and characters like solomon will make a point to show that by the standards of demons, diavolo is a good person? And you can tell how much barbatos loves him even if he considers (or says) serving him is a selfish act of atonement 

idk this is incoherent, but something about the found family dynamic between the character with objectively the most “demonic” history and diavolo who is trying to change the devildom for the better and, YES, is framed as being objectively morally “good” for a demon gets me SO MUCH. this is honestly my favorite familial relationship in obey me 🥺

[adarkermiserablecrow]

It's so interesting to me how differently the two 'sides' of this ship war can spin the same scene. I've read posts about the armchair/couch scene from both sides of the aisle and let me tell you, if I didn't know it was the same scene I would not have easily guessed

[theplantqueer]

learning that sometimes a death makes u wanna treat everything with tenderness

[hollytree33]

I’m back!!

[mitsuristoleme]

hi

just a warning this might be a bit long so

im not sure how many people are gonna see this but

i think im gonna abandon my blog for a while

ill be back (again im not sure how many of you care)

i started this blog because i enjoy writing and dont get me wrong i still do. but its doing me no favours watching fics that i pour my heart and soul into, get barely any notes

i have a lot of thoughts regarding this that im not going to voice

but anyway

bye for now

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

I'm frightened of you knowing who I am but, could you possibly give me your frank frankly theories pretty please idc if you only have like 2.1 I want them regardless of how many you have.

mayhaps?

ah man i wish i had some to give! i think all of my Frank theories (at present) are tied into other theory posts! he simply doesn't have a lot to chew on yet