#secret hoods

[psychokatrixxxy]

Love when the Justice League thinks Batman is a cryptid. This believe is only further enhanced by the face his sidekick, Robin, is clearly a shapeshifter, what with changing their height, hair style, skin tone, and even gender.

Batman clearly thinks that by having Robin look different every couple of years, it will show that they aren't cryptids like it would if Robin didn't age.

But the Justice League is too smart for that. They figured it out! But they are good friends (colleagues) and won't spill Batman's secret, but they will drop hints to him that they know, to show that they are smarter than he gives them credit for (they aren't.)

-

When the batkids learn that the league thinks this, they start periodically going to the Watchtower with Bruce, taking turns dressed up as Robin.

The League is surprised as Robin seems to prefer taking the form of a child, perhaps to have villains underestimate them? But they just assume Robin is trying out something new.

The batkids definitely tell eachother about what was said/happened as to further sell the act of Robin being a shapeshifter, because clearly it has to be the same person, Robin knows what happened, so it couldn't of been someone else dressed as Robin.

[tiger-grace]

The Dark Knight, Batman, Mr. “I am the night” maintaining his mystery even while revealing his identity in a justice league meeting:

The JL: Bruce Wayne?!

His wayward children, who have scheduled a “Brucie Wayne” funniest moments and scandals compilation to kick on in about 30 seconds on the monitor:

The JL: … bruce wayne

[farshootergotme]

Occasionally I picture Nightwing calling Red Hood "little wing" in front of others and people looking between this huge, 6'0 feet tall man with growing white hair, and then Nightwing, a shorter man who has flawless skin, probably around his 20's, and a fit but not too buff build and they just- don't know what's happening. Is it some kind of inside joke they aren't aware of? Why is Nightwing acting as if he's years older than Red-fucking jacked-Hood?

Nightwing: Little wing, you actually were decent in that fight! I'm impressed.

Hero, who was helping during this fight as well, listening in to the conversation: little...?

Red Hood: Wow, feeling very appreciated right now. Got any other backhanded compliments in there?

Hero: Wait, excuse me-

Nightwing: As a matter of fact-

Red Hood: Nope! I'm outta here. Screw you!

Nightwing: You know you love me!

Red Hood: In your dreams, dickhead!

Nightwing: Hey! We don't use that-

Red Hood: Not listening!

Nightwing: Jeez, kids these days...

Red Hood: I'm an adult and fuck you too!

Nightwing: What? Thought you weren't-

Red Hood: See you never, I'm out.

Hero: ...

Hero: what the actual fuck?

[soulrox]

DPxDC #21

Danny is a homeless kid in Gotham. He lives in Red Hoods' territory. His nickname is Numbers. A couple of kids learned he was good with numbers and quizzed him, and he got them all correct, hence Numbers. Danny loves living in Gotham, well as much as a 15-year-old homeless kid whose parents hate his existence can.

Danny is one of the kids who, when they find out info about people going against Red Hoods' rules, will report them to him. Tonight is one of those nights. Danny had learned someone sold drugs to a kid in the Alley. Danny made sure to retrieve the drugs from the kid, Stiches, and made sure the kids' friend, Patches, looked after him. cause even if Stitches wasn't able to take the drugs before Danny stepped in, the psychological damage of almost relapsing is tough, especially for a kid that couldn't be older than 12.

So Danny is on the lookout for Hood when he sees a group of people on top of a building, one of them being Batman. Danny knows that while not published Hood is connected to the Bat.

Danny scales the building and sees that its the Justice League and Batman.

Danny turns to the JL

Danny: do you have permission to be in Gotham?

Without giving them time to answer he turns to Batman

Danny: Did you give them permission? Or do you need help getting the Just Losers outta here?

Green Lantern (Hal): wha? huh, Kid?

Batman cracks a barely there smile, unnoticed by everyone, at the JL being called Just Losers.

Batman: they are allowed. Now kid what do you need?

Danny: I have info for Hood and I know you bats are all connected.

Batman gets Hood on coms.

Hood: *in Bruce's ear, but still heard by Danny* what do you want old man I'm busy.

Batman: hn a kid is here asking for you.

Danny: tell him it's Numbers

Hood: oh shit what's he got for me this time.

Danny: *tells Bats the situation* should I give the drugs to Batman?

JL in the background horrified to learn so much about Gothams' underground. (like this shit doesn't occur in their cities too)

Batman: yes I will make sure they get back to Hood so he can test and deal with them.

Danny: Cool cool

Danny does a drug deal with Batman.

Danny: so why are the Just Losers here?

Danny dislikes the JL, they never helped Amity. Dannys has gotten better with the bats thanks to Hood.

Danny: is it for the outsider setting up shop in the warehouse by the docks? With the sketchy af alien tech?

[ghost-bxrd]

Prompt:

Oliver Queen and Bruce Wayne are childhood best friends.

Green Arrow hates Batman’s guts.

That animosity— and his aim to subtly piss Batman off at every turn— results in Green Arrow and Red Hood collaborating on a trafficking bust.

This somehow results in discovering that the Red Hood is his best friend’s supposedly dead son.

Oliver doesn’t know how he’s going to fix this, with Jason refusing to want anything to do with either Bruce or the Batman of Gotham (who everyone knows is dating the former)… but one thing’s for sure:

He needs to bring the kid home. Oliver can’t bear to watch Bruce suffer any longer when the cause for it is sitting at his kitchen table, alive, and stuffing his face with waffles.

[oldmannapping]

HC: Bernard knows Tim is Red Robin, that’s fine, but he’s absolutely useless at guessing anyone else.

Bernard: “l know Jason is Batman.”

Tim: “You who the what”

Bernard: “I know your friend Bart is Robin.”

Tim: “Bern.”

Bernard: “I know Bruce is Aquaman. I know Connor is Nightwing.”

Tim: “Babe please stop.”

Bernard: (getting manic) “I know Damian is Orphan. I know Duke is Superboy”

Tim: “Wait how would DUKE be-“

Bernard: “DICK IS CATWOMAN!”

[dragonpyre]

Secret Robin au

How the batkids managed to convince Bruce to adopt Tim

Meanwhile, Tim:

Prev / Next / Commission info / ko-fi

[superbat-love]

Dick: And what would you do for him?

Contestant 1: I would die for Billion Wayne! I mean—Bruce Wayne!

Jason: Let’s go, you and me, in a real deathmatch. I’m itching for a proper send-off. Guys, remember to play ‘The Final Countdown’ at our funerals. None of that sad shit.

Contestant 1: No wait! Please don’t hurt me!

Jason: Weak! You, why should we consider you?

Contestant 2: I have a nice house, nice car, expensive taste, and I attract others to me like a magnet. You’ll find that I’m well-balanced in all aspects.

Tim: All except for your credit card balance. But I’m sure you already have more than enough admirers in the money-lending business chasing you. Next!

Contestant 3: I can defend Bruce from any kidnapper because I am indestructible!

Damian: The only indestructible thing about you is your ego, and unfortunately that’s also the only thing you’d ever be capable of defending. Next!

Contestant 4: Hi, I’m here for my interview with Mr Wayne. Is this the right room?

Dick: Depends. What are your special skills?

Contestant 4: T-There’s nothing special about me! I’m just an average guy with average skills and an average life! Umm, I can also make a pretty good pie?

Damian: What flavor? Weigh your next words carefully because Father is allergic to bullshit.

Contestant 4: Kansas-style apple pie. I learnt it from my Ma.

Dick: Great, Alfred would approve! What’s your name?

Contestant 4: Clark Kent.

Tim: Well, Clark Kent, you’ve just progressed to the next round of ‘All’s Fair In Love and War – Bruce Wayne Edition’. Congratulations!

[kizzer55555]

The Vampire Aesthetic

Ok so Danny knows two billionaires personally and they really couldn’t be more different. Yet they had one thing in common. A vampire aesthetic. Sam is fully into goth. Spiderwebs, bats, the color black. She enjoys fangs and fake blood and the darkness of her soul. Meanwhile, Vlad is Vlad. If his name wasn’t enough, the dark clothing, pale skin, and flying around with a cape and fangs with coffins in his mansion really sells it.

Danny doesn’t know many rich people so he thinks this might be some kind of trend. (If Paulina is rich, her family likes the chupacabra) So he just thinks that all rich people have some kind of vampire thing going on.

Cue Danny somehow ending in the Wayne household. Maybe he was brought over as a friend of one of the bats, maybe rescued from a field trip/vacation gone wrong, maybe some other situation. But he is there in civilian form with civilian Waynes and Danny just takes a good long look around the inside of the mansion.

“So where’s the vampire aesthetic?

Everyone freezes.

Danny just starts looking around, checking behind paintings and feeling the walls for secret levers. Used to secret passages with Vlad and possibly Sam. The Fentons definitely had them when they were temporarily rich.

“Come on, I know you guys are hiding it.”

Cue the entire batfamily thinking that this is another Tim and that he is fully aware that these people are the batfamily. Danny hangs around the mansion more and the bats just start dropping their disguises and not even bothering to hide stuff around Danny because they assume he already knows. (Possibly even trying to recruit him to be a new bat) Meanwhile, Danny, who does not know these people are batman and his birds, just does not pick up on any of it.

He grew up in a health violation with a giant ballon observatory lab above his head and a portal to the afterlife in his basement. He is a half dead teenager who has tea with the god of time and his godfather is the other parent to his clone child. He’s used to death lazers being scattered across his home and mysterious stains on clothing.

People are weird! He doesn’t judge!

[evasive-anon]

Just thinking about how Dick’s hallucination of Jason had the black shadowed face and glowing red eyes he has now.

[strange-birb]

I had too… I just had too

[tiger-grace]

Tim, secretly filming Batman on a rooftop in Gotham: okay guys, I’m gonna prove that Bruce Wayne is really Batman and Dick Grayson is R- (a completely new Robin runs by quickly) holy shit-? Did you guys just see that? The fuck was that thing?

[qweenofurheart]

Hi I absolutely LOVE your style! And I was wondering if you would be willing to draw the band au of @strange-birb ? Have a good day ^^

ok i tried my best but i definitely don't think i can capture the vibe right... the designs are so fun tho

[lentendays]

Just once I'd like to see someone make a Jason v Bruce confrontation where Bruce talks about the CANON reason he didn't kill Joker. Not the "No killing rule". Not the "I want to but it's like Pringles, I kill one I won't stop" UtRH speech.

But because Joker got himself elected the ambassador of Iran to escape Batman's wrath once he realized he done fucked up, and Superman had to stop Bruce from killing Joker because it would've caused WWIII.

[akuchi-nya]

a fast draw of jay kissing roy atfer the gitar solo, i really think they would be a wild couple on the stage hehe

this beautiful au is from @strange-birb I love her!! and all this "the secret band"

ps: I love to think that in this UA they are not vigilant so that every time Tim hangs on stage Bruce will have a heart attack hahahahah

[oldmannapping]

HC: The Batfam’s secret identities keep nearly being exposed through dumb mistakes, and citizens all over Gotham are constantly signing NDAs printed on ridiculously formal Bat insignia letterhead.

Tim: Used his Coffee Club rewards card for a free espresso as Red Robin, forgetting it was linked to his civilian identity because it was 3am and he was running on 42 hours without sleep.

Steph: Used her personal phone to tap-and-pay at Batburger with Cass. Bruce got pissy but she’s like, “Who accepts cash in a post-pandemic world, Mr Out Of Touch?” Used the experience to bargain a work phone out of Bruce.

Dick: Poses the exact same way in selfies with fans as both Nightwing and Dick Grayson. “What? Is it a crime to know my angles? I’m not apologising for having a good side!”

Damian: Constantly threatening people in League dialect as Robin and at school. It’s like a super niche language. People notice.

Jason: Grabbed one of his Red Hood jackets because it was cold and accidentally pulled out two grenades and a gun when asked for ID at the bar.

Duke: Straight up used his Signal powers to find something at the back of his locker at school. Like just lit up the hallway. “I thought I was alone!”

Cass: Took out cash from the ATM as a civilian for Batburgers with Steph, and paid as Black Bat. Someone at the bank traced the serial number of the bill and ATM surveillance footage. Batman declared that this wasn’t Cass’s fault and gave her another $50.

Alfred: Outsourced some of the superhero suit laundering to a professional company because he’s ONLY ONE MAN for god’s sake, and sometimes he needs an afternoon off.

Bruce: Literally just keeps adopting kids who look exactly like all the new crimefighters who help Batman. Has a massive public profile and just. Keeps syncing up families with Batman? People are like uhhh is he expecting us not to notice, or?

And all of them have accidentally posted to the wrong social media account at some point.