#red army family
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littlefankingdom · 1 month ago
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~ Green Arrow: Seeing Red
Really, another moment from Jason showing that his education stopped when he was 15.
The idea that Bruce and Oliver respecting life and refusing to kill is a result of their "pampered upbringing" is ridiculous. It's, firstly, pretty classicist, because portraying the elite has innocent and morally superior while the lower classes are violent and prone to murder, is classicism, even if the person saying that is from the second one.
Secondly, it's plain wrong. The elite, with it's "pampered upbringing", they don't give a fuck about hurting others and taking lives for their own gain. For THEIR greater good, they will do awful things. Open a history book, Jason, because killing less fortunate people by labelling them rapists or murderers is an extremely commun tactic used by the elite. The black folks in the USA, the Palestinians since WWII, the Parisians workers in June 1848... It was just used by the French gov to send the GIGN after a romani family, and if there is one thing European gov work hard for, it's painting Romani as violent and dangerous to justify using excessive violence. YOUR BROTHER IS ROMANI, JASON! Bruce and Oliver refusing to kill, seeing values in the most disgusting people, is them going AGAINST their upbringing. And if they did kill, as they both are very privileged white man in the US, it would be a huge abuse of power. They would be just like the others, members of the elite that kills for their own gain.
I need all of you to understand that Jason isn't speaking about fighting oppression, because that's what a lot of the fandom think he does, but he doesn't. He isn't speaking about the French killing Louis XVI, or black slaves murdering their white owner. He isn't talking about killing someone like Vladimir Putin or Bernard Arnault (one of the richest men on Earth, a French fascist that is destroying multiple countries with the power of his money). He isn't speaking about killing someone that has so much power and influence, they are untouchable, and the only solution we have rn seems to be their death. I would be fine with that, I would bring the champagne afterward. No. Jason is speaking about killing criminals that can be arrested and brought to justice. He is talking about everyday people that are also bad people. And that, that's not acceptable. Because just like I explained in the paragraph before, it's an abuse of power that has been used since forever. He acts like a cop.
"But, he is just talking about doing bad things to survive!" No, he is using that, a commun experience he and Mia went through, to open the discussion on killing people. And, sure, let's talk about doing bad thing to do good. Neither Bruce or Oliver are against that. They are both vigilante, WHICH IS ILLEGAL. I have not read much Green Arrow comics, but I know there is this important run with Hal Jordan where Oliver taught him how to fight for a better society, you have to be nasty sometimes. He is supposed to be an anarchist, and anarchists know you have to do bad thing for the greater good. They did terrorist attacks targetting presidents, for fuck's sake! (In France, one of our president was assassinated by an anarchist) And Bruce, well, he saw how corrupt his city was, especially the politicians and the cops, and he chose violence, which isn't legally good, and even immoral some would say. He took politicians out of their bed and tangled them from the highest building they own by their socks. And he had a plan to unite the crime family under his false identity Matches Malone, so to take over Gotham's underwold, which would have made THE crimelord of Gotham, just to protect the city and control crime.
In the end, what is happening here is that Jason is annoyed that his dad isn't okay with him killing people, so he decides to try to recruit another teenager by beating her up. Like, if every teenager kill with him, it makes it okay. And really, Jason, grow the fuck up. It's normal for a parent to not want their kid to be a murderer. No good parent would want their kid to kill people.
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high-voltage-rat · 10 months ago
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Actually I'm still thinking about it. Another interesting way in which RvB is anti-war is the way that the Director fills the role of a villain and antagonist (especially in the Recollections trilogy, where he's a faceless villain we never see but is responsible for everything that happens).
In his memos to the Chairman, the Director emphasizes his sense of duty and obligation to the military- he becomes irate for the first time when he feels that it's being implied that he was derelict in his duty... or that the work he did out of that duty is being criticized for being against the military's interests. He also talks about Allison's death in a way I find... interesting.
"You see; I never had the chance to serve in battle. Nor did fate provide me the opportunity to sacrifice myself for humanity as it did for so many others in the Great War. Someone extremely dear to me was lost very early in my life. My mind has always plagued me with the question: If the choice had been placed in my hands, could I have saved her? [...] But, given the events of these past few weeks, I feel confident that had I been given the chance, I would have made those sacrifices myself... Had I only the chance."
The idea of sacrifice is central to the way he talks about his wife's loss, to the way he talks about the war in general. He talks of sacrifice with a sense of veneration- that it's something he aspires to do, that he longs for. There's a few ways we can interpret "I would have made those sacrifices myself"...
-That in Allison's place, he thinks he would have laid down his life too.
-That if given the chance, he would have given his life to save hers.
But most interestingly...
-That he would have sacrificed Allison's life for the continued survival of humanity, if that was what duty called for.
...And personally, I think all 3 are true.
In most war media, the Director's perspective on sacrifice is very common. Sacrifice is glorious and heroic- to die in battle is an honour- and it's the only way to ensure the group you serve survives. This is a tool of propaganda- nobody wants to go to war just for the sake of it, you have to give them a reason that the risk of dying or being permanently disabled isn't just acceptable, but desirable. Beyond that, most people don't want to do things they think are immoral- you have to convince them it's important, a necessary lesser evil. You teach them to sacrifice their morals, too.
The way they train soldiers to follow orders and to kill, is to convince them that they, and the people around them, and the people they care about, will all die if they don't. It's drilled into your head from day one. It's the way they ensure their commanding officers won't shy away from sending their men off to die. The message is constant- sacrifice is your duty, and duty ensures your people's survival.
In the Director's eyes, the damage Project Freelancer caused was his sacrifice. He never got the opportunity to sacrifice himself during the war- so he sacrificed others, as military brass do. The Freelancers- including his daughter. The countless sim troopers. Any people he considered "collateral damage" on missions. And when the opportunity to do so presented itself, he sacrificed a copy of himself- Alpha- and he sacrificed a copy of Allison- Tex.
The very thing that derailed his life- the loss of his wife- he made it happen again. He put her copy in dangerous situations, let her exist in the position of constant repeated failure, created the circumstances that would eventually lead to her death. He put their daughter in deadly situations that nearly killed her repeatedly, provided her with impossible expectations leading to self-destructive behaviours in the name of duty, implanted her with two AI knowing they could cause her permanent harm. He was confident he "would have made those sacrifices himself" because he did.
The Director is the embodiment of the military war machine. As an antagonist, he is a warning against buying into the glorification of sacrifice. He's a condemnation of the idea that one should be willing to do anything to win a war- that duty to the military is the thing that ensures survival... All the messages that are pushed to ensure recruitment and obedience of soldiers.
He's a reminder that swallowing the propaganda leads to you doing terrible things... and in the end, you're a broken man left mourning the losses that you suffered even as you repeated them, convinced that it was all necessary.
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evilelitest2 · 4 months ago
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Hot take: The Romanov children were not threats, the white army was. If they had won and the kids were dead, they simply would’ve crowned a distant cousin instead. The royal house of sweden was founded by some random guy in napoleon���s army. There have been other times when thrones have been offered to foreign princes. Military might ensures power, legitimacy comes later.
I
Honestly the WHite Army's response to the kids being killed was "Thank god, we don't have to deal with the Monarchists". By the time the Romanovs were killed, the Whites weren't even the Monarchist faction any more (though they had a lot of monarchists within them) they were more the "Right wing psuedo autocracy" by that point. Honest to god Monarchism wasn't really a big movement by the time the Romanovs were killed, Tsar Nicholas was such a disaster of a ruler that nobody really wanted to be associated with him. The Reds probably would have accomplished more by just letting the whites take the kids, the whites would then have to decide what to do with them which would have likely ended in disaster.
Executing Nicholas and Alexandria I am sympathetic towards, both of them were monsters who did terrible things, but I can't really support the murder of the children, though I can acknowlege that Nicholas killed many more children.
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purplecladmerchant · 6 months ago
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"I sure can do something quick and fun since @boxonthenile bothered on asking me for some-"
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harrisonbrainrot · 1 year ago
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I want him to cuff me.
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jupiterfallz · 1 year ago
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BTS (bangtan) x Batfam crossover
Dick, retelling a story about a girl he was flirting with: She said, she said, she said she’s from Hawaii. How you say cute in Japanese? Kawaii
Roy: duuuuude
Jason: *face palming in the background*
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my-thoughts-and-junk · 4 months ago
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thinking about nora again
#fallout#okay first of all her full maiden name is lenore dubrovhsky#she's somehow related to the russian diplomat who is the grandfather of natalia dubrovhsky#maybe his niece? idk but she immigrated to the us after meeting nate during his tour because she claimed she was IN LOVE#i imagine she was in her late teens and nate was in his early 20s#and she falls for him and he promises he'll help her with going to college in the US and they'll have an equal marriage yadda yadda#so they get married and nora becomes a lawyer#so they've been married around seven years and she's doing her training as a legal secretary when oops! she becomes pregnant#(nate sabotaged her birth control but shhh she doesn't know that)#so nate persuades her into putting her career on hold just for a little while until they can start putting their son in daycare#(shaun takes heavily after nora's side of the family to the point nate jokes about whether his DNA had any say at all)#(he also later joins the army and dies in action)#so nora's being kept at home all the time. taking care of the kid. cooking all the meals. cleaning the house. barely any time for herself#and she gets so frazzled she gets into a minor car accident while taking shaun home from the doctor#nate freaks out and confiscates her car keys so now she can barely get out of the house without him on her arm#barely any adult social interaction and any family she could have had keeping her company was all the way over in russia#so she has a quickie with a door-to-door salesman and when her next kid pops out with red hair#the lack of resemblance to nate stops being funny#he agrees not to leave her but says he can't trust her at home alone anymore so he gets her a job at shaun's elementary school as a teacher#this happened around when shaun was 11 and he's harbored a hatred for his mom and his sister ever since#nate promised to raise the girl like his own but he's distant with her which rubbed off on shaun#so the girl. i'm calling her annabelle. TOTAL mommy's girl. wants to be just like her#so when shaun's seventeen he fakes his enlistment papers so he can be enlisted early and dies in combat#i imagine nora misses the baby boy she raised and is utterly upset he turned out this way#and by 'this way' i mean i imagine him as a patriotic misogynist and nora does not hold kind feelings towards the US for various reasons#nate was proud of his son for dying for a cause he believed in#so when annabelle's six nora gets pregnant again and that's when i imagine the bombs drop#the school nora works for is a really privileged private school (nate comes from old money) and that's where the cryo pods come in!#i imagine it would be like a 'saving america's youth for a brighter tomorrow' thing idk#also the day the bombs dropped nora killed nate before heading off to work. woulda been totally caught had the bombs not dropped HEYOOOO
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alexjcrowley · 4 months ago
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I have far too few hours of sleep but I am having a sliiight mental breakdown over Ferrari winning yesterday. It was so beautiful it still hurts.
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t4tdanvis · 1 year ago
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my medieval fantasy au is so funny bc like. dante is over here with the most basic "prince wants to be a knight and disguises himself" + "prince falls in love with a knight" story ever and genes just like. ok this is gonna sound insane but u know the guy who tried to rob me. hes uh. well hes half fae. and im not talking hot elf twink. im talking he can pop his head off and has a sword made of bone
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death-rebirth-senshi · 2 years ago
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Everyone is also like, so certain as to why Radahn sealed the stars and yet no two people agree on why and it's so funny.
I do think the theory that he was attempting to keep his own fate in stasis is potentially interesting though. It's said he learned gravity magic so he wouldn't have to abandon his horse, and it's at the end of his gravity magic lessons with the Onyx Lords that he says "Now I can challenge the stars" so...
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isaacathom · 7 months ago
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me, holding my primary ttrpg oc in my hands: im giving you so mcuh family trauma :)
#her red ribbon is a gift from her dad that relates to a paternal grandmother she never met#her engagement ring was inherited from her maternal grandmother and served the same function there#as part of a marriage to a man naielle has also never met#her jacket is part of an elaborate prank with her twin brother that she carries with her in foreign lands#as a reminder that she's him and he's her and theyre two parts of a pair even if she's entire planes away#in the time shes been away her older sister has been married and has a daughter#and naielle has never met her niece. might NEVER meet her niece.#if she waits out a collapse like she had originally planned she also may never meet her brother-in-law - a human man#he's already 30. if she's lucky she has like 50 years to try and meet him. if he's lucky. he's currently fighting in the army#and naielle knows that! her older sister and brother in law and her twin brother and her wife currently raise arms in a pitched conflict#hell her younger sister was too. now she's been forcibly conscripted into a different battle by NAIELLE#naielle did that! she brought her sister into her bullshit! it eats her alive to know that#that her family at home fights to the death and she marches her own sister towards a different precipice#its fucking bonkers#uh and i guess her younger brother exists too. listen naielle and yivien dont get along and its not even interesting#whereas naielle and mariela were briefly fully at each others throat. yiviens a coward.#if naielle went home as she is now and yivien started a fight naielle would just deck him. i think he needs that#hes not even babied that much hes just kind of an insulated brat. gotta swirlie that boy#i mean this stuff might not be trauma but it is DRAMA and naielle is full with it#all these regrets and connections to family who may not even love her (anymore)#she carries her family with her into a battle they don't know about and can't understand#unless mariela's letter back home was uh. particularly compelling. naielle doesnt know about all that
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makingcontact · 8 months ago
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Uncovering the Refugee Experience & Healing Through Storytelling (Encore)
Wilson Dairy Restaurant (Left), Helen Zia as a baby with mom (Right). Credit: Photo copyright Helen Zia used with permission. This week’s Making Contact episode is about two strong women who survived historic trauma, and the stories they later told their families.  We start with the story of Katie Wilson. Born to an Orthodox Jewish family in Kiev, Ukraine, she grew up safe and comfortable – until…
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tcypionate · 11 months ago
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lrb unlocked the memory of me being told lithuania was irrelevant during a discussion about the holocaust in class
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cuckoo-on-a-string · 12 days ago
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Neighborly
mdni
Masterlist
Soap x reader x Ghost
Summary: You didn't know hate until Johnny MacTavish. (Or a really big build-up to cuddles and smut).
Warnings: Implied anxiety disorder/depressive disorder, self-isolation, language, incredibly shitty communication and social competence.
It was supposed to be a one-shot.
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You didn’t know hate until Johnny MacTavish.
He bought the only house within half a mile, the one you expected to stay silent and empty ‘til death did you part. So, you had reason to dislike him from the start. But you were raised right, and you pushed down the snarling hermit in your soul to be a good, friendly neighbor.
The first meeting was fine, even if he was a boombox of a human being.
“Neighbor? Oh, aye! The hermit? Sorry. Heard about you when I toured the place last month.” His eye lands on the plate of cookies you’ve brought to welcome him. “Those all for me?”
You made small talk at the door, swapped names, and set the groundwork for a reliable, limited relationship as polite people who just happened to live in close proximity.
Then the first snow fell.
You spied him outside, shoveling the shared drive that led up the hill. He cleared it all, which was kind, if a little stupid. The weather system promised another two inches by midafternoon, so everything would be solid white again before sunset. Still, not your problem.
But. He was shirtless. Ripped as fuck and shirtless.
As the wind flung each shovelful of snow back in his face, the powdery flakes stuck and melted on steaming skin. Muscles flexed as he made a spectacle of himself, and your thoughts turned to strategy and available resources.
You wrapped your palms around your ugly, handmade mug and sighed, sipping hot chocolate and wishing you’d gotten a neighbor with at least two scoops of common sense.
When he didn’t appear with his shovel the next morning, you knew your foreboding prophecy had come to pass.
You brought out the stock pot, fished out packs of frozen produce harvested from your garden, and sacrificed your last bag of chicken breasts. The skeleton saved from an old rotisserie bird joined the ingredient army. Might as well go all-in. A man with that many muscles needed bone broth to recover.
Since you didn’t know if he was a picky eater, you minced the garlic and onions small, even when your eyes burned to the point you had to stop for a break. You let the aromatics brown, added celery, carrots, potatoes, and fistfuls of fresh herbs. The precious seasonings survived the winter under grow lights and protective sheeting on your dining room table.
You doubted your neighbor would appreciate this gift for everything it was, but whatever he did as an idiot neighbor would be leagues better than the presence of a rowdy ghost.
When the chicken was tender and the broth tasted like home, you poured it into individual portions and packed them in a canvas bag with a loaf of bread, a box of tea, a jar of local honey, and a thermometer. It wasn’t terribly heavy, but the cold froze your fingers through your gloves. Your hand was cramping by the time MacTavish answered the door, red-nosed, pale, and bleary-eyed.
He let you in, mumbling a scratchy-voiced welcome, and if you’d known what that conversation would incite, you would’ve let him waste away like the families you failed playing Oregon Trail.
“Eat one now and keep the rest in the fridge.” You stack the single-serve containers in the fridge as you speak, sure he won’t remember the minutiae of your instructions. The last you pop in his microwave. He’s staring at you with feverish eyes, confused and helpless like a sick dog left on the side of the road.
Everything comes out of the bag, lining his counter so he can see them – and hopefully remember he has them. The thermometer comes out last.
“If your fever is over 104 in the morning, call the doctor. I’ll drive you if you need me to.”
That glassy stare isn’t shifting. The man doesn’t even blink.
“Did you get all that?”
He clears his throat. The action and sound are both strangely slow in his exhausted state, and you’re determined not to feel bad for him.
“Aye.” Finally, he blinks. “Eat the soup. Watch for 104.”
Good enough.
“Okay.”
The microwave beeps, you pull out the soup, leaving him to fetch a spoon from wherever the hell he keeps them. You don’t wait for him to show you out. “Take care of yourself.”
He didn’t call for help, and you took your turn shoveling the drive with proper protection after the last wave of flurries passed.
The next time he saw you in passing – you were returning home and he was just leaving – he let you know your soup was delicious, that the bread was amazing, and the honey did wonders for his throat. He never returned your containers.
Ah, well. They were replaceable.
Then the next snow came, and the dumb bitch went shoveling shirtless again.
It wasn’t as much snow, and it didn’t take him half as long, but you steamed, glaring from the safety of your kitchen window. You refused to replace your meal prep supplies again. And local honey was expensive. The brat could freeze and die. Something about taking a horse to water and all that shit.
You drank your coffee black that morning, just to make a point to no one in particular.
The man didn’t know how to take care of himself, and he had no idea how to winter-proof his home.
His pipes froze. You brought buckets, old towels, bottled water, and the number of an excellent plumber. Then you explained why he should pay attention to the forecast and let faucets drip to keep the water moving. You told him to open the cabinets under sinks so heat could combat the chill along exterior walls.
His truck’s battery succumbed to the cold. You gave him a jump and escorted him to town to make sure he didn’t get himself stranded.
When he didn’t keep things stocked and tried to panic-shop before a big storm, discovering that small town shelves couldn’t meet demand, you shared staples from your pantry.
He didn’t have more than two cheap blankets in his living space, so when the holidays rolled around you gave him your latest assemblage of granny-squares. And a scarf.
He gave you burnt cookies – “Biscuits” – in return.
(And a half-empty bottle of whiskey.)
He never remembered to drag his trash down to the main road.
And gods help you if the power went out, because the man had no generator, very little in his pantry, and rarely more than a quarter tank of gas in his ride.
He was careless. Clueless. Nearly helpless.
What were you supposed to do? You couldn’t leave him to his fate. It was unneighborly and inhumane.
He made you angry. But you didn’t hate him until his friend moved in.
A few months into his residence, you went to Johnny’s door to ask if he needed anything from town before the next storm shadowed the forecast, and a stranger came to the door.
A hulking monster with a skull painted over his balaclava.
The doorway shrank around his broad shoulders, and he ducked when he stepped out. You weren’t sure if he entirely needed to, but you understood the urge – like an adult stepping out of a child’s playhouse. Scarred knuckles wrapped around the doorknob, and you knew his grip would swallow you whole by the way it engulfed the brass handle.
Animal instinct jarred you. Every hair from the base of your skull to the end of your spine stood on end as you tried to smell the air, listen to the wind, spot the predator’s intent before it was too late.
You didn’t have a problem with people balaclavas. You’d worn one the other day when you were shoveling the drive, but this looked less like protection and more like a threat.
Was he robbing your neighbor? Had a serial killer come to town? Oh, fuck.
You took a step back, reaching for your phone because you didn’t carry a weapon, especially not on a grocery run, and it was the closest thing you had to help.
“You the neighbor?”
He asked so casually, vaguely irritated, but relaxed. It wasn’t the voice of a man who’d just been caught committing a felony, and you took a second to look beyond the stranger’s mask (and size). There was a mug in his hand, and he wore a t-shirt with sweats. His socked feet lingered on the front step, just shy of the blue road salt and crisped ice. Not robbery gear. More like a… houseguest?
Your neighbor never had guests before.
It caught you so off guard your brain short circuited. He had always been a lone, helpless figure. Made sense he’d have friends, though. You couldn’t imagine he’d survive anywhere long without someone looking out for him.
You were still a little irritated that your neighbor had invited his own friend to his own house on his own property without informing you, but that was just the recluse inside snarling at a new face. Or half of one.
And – well – manners.
Holding out a mittened hand, you introduced yourself, adding, “I stopped to see if Johnny needed anyth-”
“No.” He shut you down so fast you reeled another step back. “Don’t need anything.”
He closed the door and that was that.
Sun glittered on the season’s collection of snow, a frozen fairyland that wouldn’t entirely melt until spring. Then there would be roads washed out, and mud, and you’d need to teach Johnny flash flood safety and…
It didn’t compute. Johnny was still home, so surely he’d pop out with an explanation.
You waited.
But he didn’t.
The absolute fuck?
Your spinning thoughts kept you trapped in your head for a solid minute, processing what had happened, what was implied, and what that meant for your neighborly relationship. Even when you managed to move, drive to town, and run your errands, the interaction prickled in your mind like a splinter.
You must’ve done something wrong.
Aged fluorescent lights strobed out of time with your cart’s shrieking wheels. You discovered your list wasn’t in your pocket. It waited at home, next to a pen to add Johnny’s requests. You’d already added things you doubted he’d think to ask for, and it would take time to pick apart your needs. The list wouldn’t have saved you, even if you’d remembered it.
Three bags of flour went into your cart. That was fine. They’d keep, and baking was a good way to combat cabin fever (it warmed the house as a bonus).
Two gallons of milk.
Wait.
No.
You put one back, self-conscious. A young mother with her baby stood just behind you, and an old woman was reviewing her coupons across the aisle. You refused to make eye contact, convinced you’d catch them watching. Did they see? Were they worried about your germs on the product you put back? Did they think you were too broke to buy what you needed? Maybe they thought you’d just broken up with your boyfriend or something.
You counted the squares in the linoleum as you marched away from the refrigerators’ humming. One less source of white noise. It didn’t help as much as you’d hoped. The real buzzing roared inside your skull.
Johnny was a pain in the ass, but at least he was friendly. He wasn’t considerate, but he always thanked you. His friend was a whole different beast. Unfriendly. With a spare set of teeth snarling at the world.
The stranger hadn’t even introduced himself. Was he staying long? Moving in? What was he to Johnny? That question alone would answer so many others.
Because you’d never seen him interact beyond basic business with the mechanic, you realized you had no idea of his sexual orientation. Was he gay? Bi? Pan?
His shirtless shoveling shenanigans annoyed you, yes, but you’d unconsciously granted him a little leeway, assuming it had to do with misguided masculine showmanship. The rooster strutting where the hen could see. The dumbass alpha male proving he was a good, strong provider who was also quite nice to look at.
Clearly you were wrong, and in retrospect, you couldn’t see him as anything but a narcistic dipshit in need of training wheels.
You’d thought, maybe, he even liked you. As a friend? A comrade against the cold? As something.
But you were just a stop-gap. Useful.
Convenient.
Until his real friend joined him.
You found your attention unraveling like a cheap sweater. No matter how hard to you dried to darn the holes, you couldn’t keep up with the loose thread undoing all your conscious measures. It was quickly becoming one of those days when you convinced yourself your therapist had lied about everything.
When you messed up, even in your head, everyone knew.
If they didn’t say otherwise, you were annoying everyone in the room. If they did say otherwise, they were just being polite.
You weren’t likeable, not loveable, and the minute you weren’t useful you should make yourself scarce. Otherwise, things would get awkward, and no one wanted that. You could be the adult. You could hack off a limb and smile about it.
It didn’t hurt, and even if it did, it shouldn’t, because you didn’t have a right to that feeling.
Alright. Fine.
You realized, just as you joined the line for the cashier, that you’d forgotten matches and sugar. They’d been on your list. But someone joined the line behind you, and unspoken social rules that probably didn’t exist shackled you in place. Too late. You’d look stupid. You’d bother someone. Oh well. You’d just have to make another trip. Soon. But not too soon. Now there were two sets of eyes watching you from the connecting drive, and you didn’t want to give them reason to gossip and laugh and assume…
Your pile of groceries looked too small on the conveyor belt. Roughly half what they’d been lately. Would the cashier notice? You were sure she did. The way she recited your total sounded disappointed. Was she counting on you buying more? Were you hurting the employees’ holiday bonus? Shit. Fuck.
The bags felt too heavy. Too light. You forgot your reusable sacks at home, and the plastic dug guilt and accusations into the crease of your palms. On top of everything else, you were killing the planet.
You drove home.
Along the river. Through the trees. Up the hills to your corrupted sanctuary.
At least you didn’t need to make a second trip to bring in all the shopping. Your haul landed on the counter, you threw the damned milk in the fridge, and you realized, as you opened the pantry, that you already had four bags of flour. Two all-purpose, two for bread. Because you’d planned to bake for two.
The flour hadn’t been on your list.
And there was no room for it.
Your lip wobbled, and you bit it ferociously, chewing it until the texture changed and bits of skin started peeling.
It wasn’t a problem. You liked being prepared. You’d dump it in one of the emergency storage totes you kept in the hall closet and be ready when something went wrong.
You did just that, popping open the plastic lid and layering the flour over dry lentils, black beans, and shelf-stable cartons of broth. You decided to add more baking supplies to the list. Even if the power went out you could use the wood-burning stove in the living room to make griddle cakes. Maybe even soda bread.
There. Yeah. That wasn’t so bad. A silver lining.
As you returned to the kitchen, brainstorming ways to atone for the plastic bags you’d used, the scent of coffee wafted down the hall. Which was strange. Because you hadn’t put the moka pot on. You rushed in, frowning.
The old drip machine you only used for company burbled in the corner, and the groceries sat precariously on the corner, shoved aside by the beast who’d wandered through your unlocked door.
A tall, mohawked figure groped, shoulder-deep, in your cabinets.
MacTavish.
The Scottish mumbling would’ve tipped you off even if you weren’t so familiar with his figure (and hair, and limited wardrobe).
Your angst tasted bitter as you swallowed it down. You needed space for the feelings popping like firecrackers in your chest.
Relief. Hope. Dread.
He was in your space without invitation, and with the morning you’d just had, you felt anything but comfortable. Either you’d jumped the gun, or he was bringing a delayed apology for his friend.
“Johnny? What are you doing here?”
He smiled over his shoulder as he pulled two cups down from the shelf. One with your college logo and your prized ugly mug.
“Hello, neighbor!” He cackled, laughing at his own joke. “Wanted to give you a heads up and have a chat. My friend’s come to stay with me.”
Friend? What flavor of friend?
“I know. We met this morning.”
“Aye. Real barrel o’ sunshine, isn’ he?”
“If you say so.”
You wanted to be nice. You wanted to be his friend, too. But you weren’t, and you’d worked so hard to be a good, reliable person he could depend on in a new town – you were drained.
“His name’s Ghost.”
Most people grew out of their edgelord status by their early twenties. Ghost –with his skull balaclava and gruff voice – seemed better fit for the emo table of a suburban high school cafeteria than the adult world.
Johnny kept prattling, making an introduction for someone who wasn’t even there. “Told him all about you! He was impressed. Smacked me over the head about the pipes and said we’d go into town for a generator before the next big snow.”
“Hard to predict the next big snow.”
“Aye. He said that, too.”
If Ghost could keep your insights out of his mouth, you would appreciate it. It felt like he was stealing something from you, and you found yourself shifting from foot to foot, arms crossed, waiting for something terrible to happen.
And it did.
Gesturing as he described his old buddy and new housemate, his elbows danced around your kitchen like battering rams. First, he struck a cabinet, which hurt him more than the wood. He laughed it off. Kept talking. You didn’t need to say a word. By that point, you probably couldn’t even if he left space to speak.
For the life of you, you couldn’t riddle out what his visit was for. It was exhausting. He never chattered so much when you brought food or showed him how to keep his home in one piece. Ghost must make him very happy. His joy made you anxious.
His arm wide, indicating the views he’d fallen for and not the practical considerations of living in the goddamn woods on a goddamn mountain, and you watched in slow motion as his forearm caught your ugly mug’s handle.
It spun, wobbling to the edge of the counter, and before you could move, it plummeted.
A bad day instantly became your worst in years.
It must’ve made a sound when it hit, but you didn’t hear it. Or didn’t remember it. You didn’t remember going to the floor after it, either.
Your mug was in pieces, and when you pulled them to safety, wrapped tight in your fist, the glazed edges cut deep. It was such an ugly little thing. Your ugly little thing. You’d made it in one of those sip-and-spin pottery classes with your pals before you stopped going to see people face-to-face.
The mug wasn’t a friend. It was all of your friends. It was the fun you, the one who went out and did things, and moved through life like a real, entire person.
It practically exploded when it hit the tile. Some pieces were bigger than others, but there were dozens of them. Glittering chips and flecks that you knew you’d be finding with your feet through the rest of the winter.
There was no fixing it. It hurt. You were bleeding. Red oozed up between your knuckles and snaked down your wrist.
“Oh, shite! Shite, shite, shite. Are you alright? Here, let me –”
You didn’t want him to touch it again. Didn’t want him to touch you and act like he gave a fuck. This was a big, ugly feeling bubbling up inside, and if he didn’t dislike you yet, he would when he saw all the tears and snot.
A pretty crier you were not.
And no one wanted to see that, or deal with it, or cope with someone else’s messy emotions.
“It’s fine. I’m okay.” You grit your teeth and smiled through them. “But I need to clean this up, and I still have groceries to put away. How about you get your friend settled and we can talk another time, okay?”
“Are you sure?” His attention was fixed on the blood. Bright red was such an alarming color. You could understand.
“Yeah. Just a little scratch. Promise. But I can’t play host and clean myself up.”
His neck went stiff, and his eyes flicked from your face to the floor. Several times. Like he was having an argument with himself. But in the end, he listened, nodded, and got back on his feet from where he’d knelt in front of you.
“If you insist. But we’re right over there if you need anything, aye?”
“I know.”
Finally, he left.
You got up and locked the door behind him. If you’d taken time to do that before you put away the groceries none of this would’ve happened. You would still have your mug and you wouldn’t be on the floor, crying and cradling the remains of something that mattered to you.
-----------------------
He kept coming over when he needed things. Usually after Ghost’s truck rumbled down the drive. Sometimes he wanted advice. Sometimes he needed help. Usually he took tools and supplies he should’ve bought for himself.
You put your curtains to good work. You couldn’t remember a time you drew them so often. If he knocked, you’d answer, but the curtains were a good deterrent. Not foolproof, but something that gave you a little more power over your privacy.
Long jaunts into town have become escapes from your own home. Better the eyes of strangers – fleetingly painful – than the paranoia of sitting under glass where your neighbors might read your habits and foibles by the way the lights turn on and off through the night, might judge your messy hair through the kitchen window as you wash the dishes. Might, might, might. There were terrible possibilities in all that potential.
They were always there. One ready to freeze you out, the other hanging on your apron strings like a teenager who just got his first place. The conflict rubbed over your nerves like a match on a boot heel. Too much, too fast, and you’d combust.
So you found a lot of reasons to go into town. You remembered how much you liked the library, the joy of a cinnamon roll someone else baked, and hot coffee that didn’t come with a side of flashbacks.
The forecast predicted heavy snow overnight, and you made a day of grocery shopping, collecting novels from the library, and avoiding your neighbor’s last-minute requests.
You barely noticed the teens rushing out of the parking lot as you left your final stop, canvas bag loaded with enough media to keep you entertained through the storm of the century. No windows were broken. No key marks scuffed the paint. If they committed any mischief, it was minor.
Gas theft didn’t cross your mind until your engine quietly gave out and your car rolled to a stop between Nowhere and Nothing.
Understanding dawned with grudging revulsion. Like looking at the toilet and realizing it wouldn’t flush.  
The little shits had siphoned your tank.
You smacked the steering wheel, cursing.
So much for the benefit of the doubt. You couldn’t escape. Everyone everywhere just wanted to use you.
But it was fine. Everything would be fine. You were always prepared in case someone fucked you over. Your wellbeing was your responsibility, after all.
Climbing out of the warm cabin, you headed to the back and pulled out the emergency gas can.
The red plastic was shockingly light. You didn’t realize until you’d already thrown your weight into the yank. Unbalanced, you tottered, and your heel skidded over ice.
The snow cushioned your fall, and you stared blankly into the white limned branches overhead as you tried to process the last five seconds. Things like this happened to idiots. They did not happen to you. Careful, cautious you with your backup plans and reserves.
You had simply made a mistake. Somewhere. Somehow. You’d find an explanation.
When you sat up, still in a state of shock, you examined the can, expecting signs of a mouse, or a crack, or…
An I.O.U. was taped to the back.
You knew the handwriting all too well.
That shitting little…
The snow arrived. Silence swallowed the mountain, and the gloaming snuffed the last of the sun’s warmth.
You sat alone on the side of the road, well aware that no one would come up this way for hours. Days maybe.
You had made a mistake.
You made your neighbor chicken soup.
Your nose burned, and you sniffed. Hot tears rolled down your face, burning as they went, and you wiped at them furiously. The wool of your mittens chafed your cheek. Your lip wobbled, and you hurled the empty can into the woods.
Fuck Johnny MacTavish.
Fuck Ghost.
Fuck your life.
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sistertotheknowitall · 11 months ago
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Danny is Some Guy being followed
Part three? I guess, cause apparently it’s not content to stay in my head. Part One, Part Two
To say Danny was awake when he fist met these guys would be true, but to say he was fully aware would be a lie, and to live in Gotham one needed to be constantly aware.
If not, they would end up in this exact situation. Being stalked by vigilantes.
Him, Danny “Phantom” Fenton, Ghost King of the Infinite realms, was being constantly followed by a vigilante family. At least Danny assumed they were a family after hearing Red Hood call Nightwing “little brother.” (“I’m older than you.” “Yeah but you’re shorter.” “That’s not how that works!”) Also there was a child and at least three teenagers running around in spandex and armor. If they weren’t a family Danny wasn’t half-dead.
Anyway, Danny was pretty-sure they were watching him. His only guess as to why, well it started with a comment he made when slightly delirious. Because on that night when he was awake but not really, he called Batman the the fury-vigilante. In front of who the young king now realizes might be the bat’s son.
Danny understands that it might have been embarrassing but also it was just a comment and not even an original one! A lot of people called him that! And sure, not always to his face but still it could not have been his first time hearing it.
So Danny saw it as unnecessary to send out his army of (admittedly nice) children to harass Danny whenever they could. It was getting old and they always looked at him as if he was the odd one. Which he was but they didn’t know that. Like, Danny is just trying to get to where he needs to go, you people are the ones squaring up to random thugs on a school night.
Not that Danny didn’t appreciate the constant rescues, but he knew the life of a teenage vigilante and it wasn’t an easy one. Danny had a list of regrets and the scars to prove it. Hell, Baby Ninja looked younger than Danny when he first started.
In the first month of being shadowed Danny was sure he had met all of Batman’s children, either by rescue or confrontation. (How was he supposed to know he wasn’t allowed near that wearhouse?) He decided that Red Robin and Signal were his favorites, they spoke to him as a fellow person. Dickwing was his least favorite. After the incident with the Fenton anti-creep stick and four creeps, Dickwing started to lecture Danny on self-preservation and “being too young to put himself in that kind of danger.” Danny had stared pointedly at Baby Ninja on the fire escape (not that Dickwing noticed.)
Danny didn’t really now what their goal was, so far outside the three a.m. gun fights, the hypocritical lectures, and Baby Ninja’s prickly nature, the Batkids weren’t so bad. Still Danny wasn’t going to tell them his name. Hello? they were following him. Yes they were vigilantes but they were also stalkers and Danny had rights.
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redridcr · 2 years ago
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"And why should I plead on your behalf?"
"Because you will have our support in an event of change in... circumstances."
"I do not understand. What circumstances?"
"If you brother was no longer king."
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