#ok listen guys i think this is nice!!! its good its pretty!!!!

[little-piece-of-tamlin]

finished piece i did for my dads birthday. i usually paint mountains for him but i didnt really have it in me this year lol

[infizero]

came to the startling realization just now that there are people who actually think light was totally fine and all his evilness came from the death note. ermmm. loud incorrect buzzer

[phagodyke]

i will ALWAYS be salty abt the ed-sheeranification of one ok rock (one of my fave personality-building anecdotes i explain at parties to ppl getting to know me) but the fact is that takas voice is soooo hot he could sing the words on the back of a milk carton to the tune of a t*ylor sw*ft song + id probably still listen to him. sorry

[honeytonedhottie]

maintaining/creating a social life⋆.ೃ࿔*:･🧁

ok so i used to have HORRIBLE social anxiety and i think that the contrast between me with social anxiety and me now is INSANE. in a good way ofc. so im not going to talk about how i overcame social anxiety, instead im going to talk about how i created a social life ✨

MAKING FRIENDS ;

the science of making friends is simple and im about to explain it. so go to where there are ppl that u can relate to/want to relate to. example being school, clubs, etc.

next, observe who u want to befriend and make sure to start with a compliment. starting off by introducing urself just makes for an awkward conversation but starting with a compliment puts u and the other party at ease.

something thats rly important is ur CHARISMA and ur magnetic energy so be CHARMING ✨ if u find that the other party is not reciprocating its either they're uncomfy, uninterested, or just a weirdo. and in all cases, you should stop.

MAKING FRIENDS THRU FRIENDS ;

make friends with your friends friends -> make friends with their friends -> and so on and so forth. this is how you network and create a friendly status with lots of people.

if ur in a school setting like i am, make friends with people in ur own grade or in a higher up grade, i dont usually make friends with ppl in lower grades but ofc there are always exceptions.

making friends through friends is how u get invited to parties, have more opportunities be available to you, and ofc network for more connections. guys connections are literally EVERYTHING.

MAKE TIME FOR UR FRIENDS ;

make sure to learn who u call friends. when is their birthday? do they have specific preferences? what kind of music do they listen to? knowing ur friends makes them feel special and thats how u learn to be a good friend. i can make a whole POST about being a good friend cuz i've learned and grown so much with that.

THE POWER OF A COMPLIMENT ;

make it ur mission to give a compliment everyday cuz first off, being nice is HOT so pls be nice and second of all, if ur trying to talk to someone and u start with a compliment i promise that it'll go so much better.

if ur thinking "thats so awkward how will i do that" then the category dont be shy is one that u gotta read cuz girl 💀. if u need an example i'll provide one from my own experience so u can see the power of a compliment.

there was this girl in my spanish class and i always thought that she was so pretty and she seemed so nice. one day we bump into each other in the bathroom and i compliment her hair and makeup, she responds well. we continue to have friendly interactions throughout the rest of the school year and now we are good friends on and off campus.

DONT BE SHY ;

when u make friends please please PLEASE work on ur confidence first. you need to be SURE of yourself. if not, when ur being friendly it could come off as desperation and ppl will humiliate, make fun of and take advantage of u. and thats NOT hot.

be CONFIDENT, you literally have nothing to lose. when u shed ur shyness (thru things like exposure therapy etc) a whole new world is opened up for u bcuz sometimes the only thing holding u back is urself and ur limiting beliefs about urself.

MAKE UR PERSONALITY SHINE ;

make sure that know ur own personality and from knowing that u can find ways in which u can make it shine. no matter what ur personality is though, something that i cannot stress enough is BE NICE.

be friendly and amicable with everyone and stay out of drama and if drama comes to you then stay unbothered 😭. dont try and uproot ur own personality to copy someone else's.

[ottosinventory]

Almost got you, bitch

(Hazbin Adam x fallen angel!Male reader)

No warnings I think perhaps cursing

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You were a fallen angel.

You questioned heavens doings after finding out about the extermination, and of course heaven didn't like that.

When you fell, your best friend, Adam, was the most pissed off. Granted he was the one who told you about it one night when he was drunk and you had to get him home but he didn't know you were gonna make such a fuss about it.

You were in heaven, everything was fine you had your friends there, no one important to you fell before you, and most importantly you had him there, your best friend. Why would you care about those misfits in hell??

All though he shouldn't have been surprised, even though you put on a hard shell and make very similar jokes than himself you are a kind soul, a very kind one at that always helping others. But still, you fell, you are not here with him anymore. That sucked.

*flashback*

Heaven was a pretty new invention and adam and eve were trying to settle, for that god sent an angel, you.

When you knocked on the door adam went to open it.

"Who the fuck is here this early?" Was the first sentence he ever spoke to you.

Now you aint gonna take shit from nobody.

"Im the fuck who is here get you asses moving cuz we're going to heaven" you said with an equally annoyed tone.

Thats when Adam knew he liked you. And with the same amount of sass to each other the two of you became fast friends.

"I Almost got you, bitch" yelled Adam. You guys were playing flying tag cuz he just got his wings and they were completely new to him.

"You wish, fucker" you answer with a shit eating smirk. You were the one to teach him how to fight, the one who helped him through his divorce withe eve, you were his best friend.

*end flashback*

"...Shit" adam called seraphim, an idea occurred to him, how about they move up the next extermination, that way he has a reason to get down there sooner and bring you back, also slather some demons.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When you woke up in hell, the first thing you saw was someone trying to cut out your organs.

"WAAHH...MOTHERFUC-- WHAT THE HECK R U DOING??" You jumped up and started yelling at the demon.

"Calm down pretty boy, the cannibals pay good money for fresh organs like yours."

"Well guess what jackass I dont give tiny rats ass how good those fuckers pay you my organs aint for sale" and with that sentence you quickly kicked him in the nuts and when he fell to the ground brocke his neck. Yeah...you were kind but god help people who mess with you...literally.

"Well shit, never had to fight without wings."

"...Interesting, and here I thought I would have to come to your rescue in exchange for your soul." Came a...static voice from behind you.

"Uhhh...thank you?? I guess, but there will be no taking my soul." You looked at the grinning man in a red suit.

"Such a shame, you'd be my first fallen angel"

"...Ok, listen can I help you with something ooooorr??"

"Not particularly I just wanted your soul, but alas that ship has sailed, however since you just fell I assume you have no where to stay" his grin stretched a bit as he said that.

"Well, you assume correctly but Im not gonna agree to any deal you have to offer just for a place to stay"

"Well, well, you are smart one even though angles can be so gullible, but no there is no deal the only thing you'd have to do is perhaps act nice"

"I can do that." you answered finally smiling at the strange man.

"They are coming" you whispered to yourself. After you arrived in hell, Alastor offered you a place in the hazbin hotel and you were happy to take it. This was over 7 months ago, in that time you grew close to everyone who was there, they were your found family and now you will protect them even if its against you first family.

Today was the day of the extermination, the day you'd have to fight heaven, the day you's have yo fight Adam. Even though you never admitted to yourself you had deeper feelings for him than friendship, but since he literally went around fucking bitches that kind of lowered your hopes.

The fight was raging on. Since you were the one who literally trained these exorcists they were no match for you. However Alastor was supposed to take on Adam, and that worried you. You knew how powerful Alastor is supposed to be but you have seen Adam's powers first hand.

Just as you suspected Alastor couldn't take on Adam. So Charlie had to take over which made you even more worried. You climbed up and saw Adam hitting Charlie into the hazbin hotel sign.

"NO" you yelled

Adam turned towards you with a smile that said he was ready to kill, that disappeared however when he saw that it was you.

"(Y/N)...."

He looked at you for a moment when someone punched him out of no where.

"Oh shit" you said while looking at Adam flying away and than back at who punched him. Lucifer.

"Lucy?" U asked baffled. You met him when he was still in heaven. Personally you loved his creative ideas while the making of earth so you guys would talk a lot. You also found it highly unfair when he fell and considered going after him, but Adam held you back.

"...Who--? SHIT (Y/N)? Omg why tf are you down here??" He asked half pissed half happy to see you.

"Well a little this, a little that, you know, also I fucking fell so." You replied while hugging him.

"How many of you fuckers do I have to beat before I can take (Y/N) home with me" said Adam very pissed after crawling out from the window he was punched into.

"What?" You asked

"I'm the only one that matters, you messed with my daughter and now Im gonna fuck you" said Lucifer proudly smirking. Everyone went silent while you were trying to hold back your laughter.

"Khmm...its fuck you up, dad" corrected Charlie

"Wait what did I say?" Asked Lucifer confused.

After this a kind of...fight started between Lucifer and Adam. Well, only adam was fighting Lucifer was mostly changing forms.

It was quite funny to watch.

At the end Lucifer won over Adam and he wanted to kill him, but your body moved on its own and you threw yourself at Adam.

Charlie also told his dad to stop.

You stood up from Adams body.

"Take your angel army, and go home" you told him in a soft tone.

He painfully stood up and looked at you with sadness...and something you couldn't quite place.

"(Y/N)..." come with me, please. Is what he wanted to say, but he knew you are still mad at him and that your answer will be no. Or he just didn't want to seem vulnerable in-front of demons.

"I Almost got you, bitch"

Your lips twitched upwards a little bit.

"You wish, fucker"

And with that the angel army and adam flew up to heaven.

When adam arrived in heaven, something downed on him.

"Fuuuuuuckkk..IM GAY-"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Is he an (at best) mid white man who thinks he is the shit?

Yes.

Is he a fucking loser though and a lil bitch

Also yes.

BUT YK WHAT.

HE IS FUNNY AF I LOVE HIM AND HIS SONGS R FUCKING AWSOME.

HOPE MY FELLOW ADAM ENJOYERS LIKED IT THOUGH😎

I hope you enjoyed your reading ladies gentleman and others, good afternoon good evening and good night🦖🧡

[tyunn1ngz]

hueningkai nsfw alphabet

cw: gn!reader i think ? to the best of my ability anyways and no gender is stated regardless

a = aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

total softie!!!!!!:( wants to be held and wants to hold u and its just oh-so delicate and tender just two lovers in ur own little safety bubble— giggles w hushed pinky promises that u will meet in ur dreams that night

b = body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

on himself his lips and his fingers— his lips on urs, his fingers in u; his fingers in ur mouth, he’s obsessed w it all, he likes it so much

on u ur thighs and tummy!!! marking u up all over and squishing the skin under his fingertips, rubbing over ur tummy when hes inside u just to watch u squirm and gasp .. ( ；∀；)

c = cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

his cock gets so wet when hes hard n he cums a lot its so cute really especially cuz he’d get so shy abt it <3

d = dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

gets off to ur voice sometimes— like listens back to voice notes u’ll send him even if all u r doing is talking abt ur day and gets himself so hard out of nowhere he loves hearing u

e = experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

a big virgin w no idea what hes doing before u but thats ok!!!!! thats what practice is all abt !!!!!!! more fun for u especially bc hes such an eager learner <3

f = favourite position (this goes without saying)

spooning or riding — spooning is so intimate and he can feel up ur thighs and tummy so nicely that way, or dip his hands to bring u more pleasure to ur sex; and u riding him means u can take the reins and he’s very into that! use him to get urself off honey!

g = goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

silly for the most part, its more relaxing and comforting that way, sex isn’t some performance between u two. but sometimes it feels like his brain just melts and pours out his ears so thats when it’ll seem more serious, bc u’ll have just a soft big eager puppy on ur hands then :<

h = hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

for my own personal bias. No shaving. all his body hair in tact. everyone listen to me bc that is SEXY. his happy trail ohhgod

i = intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

very intimate, has to be touching u at all times it’d be like chopping a limb off if u told him he wasnt allowed to touch u. loves rubbing his cheeks against urs idk thats just a thing in my head

j = jack off (masturbation headcanon)

cracks knuckles what do u guys know abt PLUSHIE HUMPER kai who steals sprays of ur perfume or lets u cuddle a specific one so it’ll smell like u when he fucks it later and cries ur name softly … what do u KNOW!!!!!!!!!!!!

k = kink (one or more of their kinks)

nipple play. make this boy cum from just playing w his nipples i swear to god. and when hes more on the dominant sides of things definitely dacryphilia imo

l = location (favorite places to do the do)

just the bedroom !!! but maybe a quickie in the bathroom at a party could be up his alley too whos the say ;p

m = motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

watching u get changed or get ready in general, defo also gets so hard when u do smth as simple as sit in his lap and move a little too much hes just too easy !!!!!!!!!!

n = no (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

nothing too rough and violent, and not heavy on the degradation either. just a tiny bit sometimes but hes more abt praise!! dont b too mean to him he’ll get stuck in his head :( not too fond of too much degradation towards u for this reason too! just a little if its what ur into but he prefers being nice to u its just in his nature no matter how bratty u get w him </3

o = oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

a giver, bc it means he can make u feel good and also be between ur thighs which make for great earmuffs! not very good at it sometimes but his eagerness makes up for it!!!! other times he’s absolutely expert w his tongue its insane

he does love receiving tho!!!!! as much as he won’t admit it bc he thinks it’ll make him selfish for some reason Σ('◉⌓◉’) loves when u take him especially deep— rly makes his thighs shake and u have to keep ur hands on his hips to keep him from practically fucking ur throat >_>

p = pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

gentle but kinda fast ? he gets so desperate and pathetic that he needs it to be faster but he can’t hurt u so he’s gentle by nature. he’ll get a lil rougher when he’s closer to cumming tho or if u rly push for it<3

q = quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

don’t happen often but when they do they’re the hottest thing in the world. he either goes so dumb hes basically melted into ur arms and pleading, almost in tears or! he’s finally treating u like u won’t break and just taking what he wants, whispering how good u feel and how a little part of him wants someone to walk in and see u breaking in his hold :3c

r = risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

a little! nothing crazy but if theres a more tame fantasy u wanna try he’d defo be down, and he’s happy to tell u his own fantasies, even if his face burns up w embarrassment w every word. not too fond on risks, not big ones anyway but little thrills r always fun!!!! ฅ/ᐠ. ̫ .ᐟ\ฅ

s = stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

doesnt last long the first round especially but he’ll go as many rounds as u want. obsessed w how u feel when u cum on his cock so if u orgasm once and its not w him inside u ur gonna be going again and even then it might not be enough he’ll be overstimulating the both of u to the heavens— just be aware of that !

t = toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

lowk vibrator obsession, loves watching u use it, loves using it on himself, loves using it on u, u using it on him— u both using at the same time, pressed up against either side of it and crying into each others mouths .. could also see him loving the idea of having a fleshlight. Gulps. ＿|￣|���

u = unfair (how much they like to tease)

teases u a lot when hes in charge just to see ur glassy eyes and pretty lips form a pout, but hes pretty hypocritical bc he doesnt like to be teased and he’ll get so pathetic when u do .. sigh

v = volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

louder when hes closer to cumming, whimpers and gaspy moans that grow louder and higher in pitch the closer he gets, probably likes to stuff his face in a pillow or plushie to keep himself quiet bc he gets so embarrassed but he sounds so pretty :((((

w = wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

never really puts u in ur place when u act bratty but one time he just snaps and ur legs were trembling for a good two days after; good thing he was back to his little angelic self and carried u everywhere

x = x-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

big hes hung asf. personally im a little more interested in the 50 pounds of ass he carries around but ig his cock is also important in this category

y = yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

HIGH! .. once he gets a taste of sex— of you, he is insatiable woooo boy

z = zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

hes not conking out until ur asleep first!!!!!!! so however long ur awake for after all is done, he’s up too!!!! no matter how hard his eyelids try to droop closed ok and if ur not sleepy hes not either (he is but just keep talking ok he’ll keep fighting it off)

[vigil-antes]

*During a particularly slow patrol or stakeout*

Steph: Soo, if you were to have a song as your theme, what song would you choose? Personally i think id be 'Applause' by Lady Gaga.

Damian: This is ridiculous, brown, i will not be part to such a foolish activity.

Steph: Dont be such a debby downer, brat. Have some fun once in your life.

Damian: *Scoffs*

Dick: I like this game! i-

Bruce: We're on an important mission, everyone. Keep the talk work related.

Steph: C'mon big guy, nothing's happening, and we're all close to falling asleep. If anything, this ensures we're attentive if anything happens.

Bruce: ...Very well. But keep your eyes on the target.

Dick: Will do! Anyways, as i was saying, i think id be 'Royals' by 'Lorde'!

Steph: Dick, i mean this in the nicest way possible but you are quite literally the closest thing there can be to modern-society royalty.

Dick: Yeah, thats why i like the song!

Tim: So you just never listen to the words?

Dick: I mean i never really close attention but is it really that much of a problem??

Duke: I mean, you are like, all of the things she mention she's never going to be.

Dick: Oh :(

Steph: *Snorts* Yeah, if anything youd be 'Candy' by Robbie Williams.

Tim: Hah, yeah.

Dick: Ok, i like the song but now im getting the feeling that its not a compliment.

Cass: Dumb but nice big brother :)

Damian: You do act quite like an empty headed buffoon at times, Richard.

Dick: What! No! Ok wait let me choose another song... ok, ill be 'Killer Queen' by Queen, ok?

Steph: Yeah i guess i can accept that. What about you, tim?

Tim, in a completely dead voice: 'What is love' by TWICE.

Duke: Uh...

Tim: I said what i said.

Duke: Ok... well, i like 'sunflower' by Post Malone.

Dick: Aaw, you are like a sunflower, thats so nice

Cass: You are very bright and warm, yes. Like sunshine

Duke: Thats the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me.

Cass: I like 'The dog days are over' by Florence and The Machine

Tim: Thats... pretty much perfect for you.

Dick: Yeah, agreed.

Tim: So, baby brat, what about you?

Damian: I told you, i wont lower myself to such childish games!

Dick: Come on, little bat, for me?

Damian: I am not one to be swayed so easily, you fool!

Cass: Dont be mean, baby brother, and have fun. Please?

Damian:

Damian: Fine. I choose 'You should see me in a crown' by Billie Eilish. I would look very good in a crown.

Steph: Yeah, i dont know what i expected

Dick: What about you, Bruce?

Bruce: I dont listen to music.

Tim: Damn man, that sounds depressing, you must know a song or two

Bruce: I really dont know that many songs, Tim. Maybe you can choose for me

Dick: No! That defeats the purpose of the game, B, come on, just think about it for a second

Bruce: Mmm... I guess if i were to choose, 'Viva la vida' by Coldplay woul-

Jason, who has the comms frequency but never uses and isnt even on the same mission: Personally I'd be 'Fireworks' by Katy Perry

Dick: Jay! its so nice to hear you parteci-

Jason: Specifically the part that goes 'do you ever feel already buried deep, six feet underground but no one seems to hear a thing'

Dick: *softly* Jay, no.

[wintergrofyuri]

@itsonlypolite

@wrathful-banette

TEEHEE OK

so. i forgot to say. skeptic IS a detective. a pi. a gumshoe. a dick, if you will. but i guess thats sort of implied already. i just wanted to state it clearly.

but anyways.

this whole thing was made bc im so fucking insane about the cage chapter. the themes about being a slave to fate and how our actions are not our own and losing control of yourself and your life. just. ugh. it speaks to me a lot. and ofc skeptic being an old timey detective is so universal. i joke about hating him but i Do like him and find him interesting. i want to put him in situations.

and thats what this whole au is. putting skeptic in situations. hearing new perspectives, having his theories proven wrong, dealing with uncooperative suspects, red herrings. i love when hes wrong or ignored or otherwise slighted. he seems very. sure of himself? not an arrogant fool, but more. a guy who hasnt been wrong before. ykno. and i think ur typical film noir (with slay the princess elements like cycles and fate) is just a really natural fit to explore all that.

but its Also about playing with the whole "perception based creature" thing that the princess has going on. i Love "character nobody really knows" and the princess, with her multiple forms and fluid personality, works Rlly rlly well with this concept. i love the princess and i think she deserves to be a mysterious "haunting the narrative" type character. shes like a spy with multiple disguises. or someone in witness protection.

and also bartender hero lives in my mind like a parasite. oh my god that reminds me i need to talk about the others ok.

hero is the bartender (as stated before) of "the long quiet" bc i think its funny theyre still in tlq even in this silly film noir au.

stubborn is the bouncer/bodyguard/whatever the fuck you call it. he kicks ppl out when they get too rowdy.

cheated is The regular there. he either sits at a table and mopes or gets roped into a card game with opportunist that results in both of them being kicked out (theres always blood drawn).

opportunist is a conman/snake oil salesman whos only still allowed bc hero is too nice and opp is too good at buttering ppl up.

smitten is a tortured artist, lamenting to anyone who will listen about his lost love and muse. he is never paying his damn tab, but again, hero is too nice.

cold is a mysterious figure who only visits the bar like. once a month. he barely talks to anyone and only drinks water. (hes an assassin LOL)

broken is the local priest (the god is shifty btw) who only visits bc hero told him to get out more. he doesnt drink either. he just looks vaguely haunted.

contrarian is a guy whos hard to pin down. you cant find him, you just have to pray he appears ykno. the only people who Know him are hero and cold, but hero refuses to divulge anything abt him and cold is just. Cold. ykno.

paranoid is skeptic's partner (lol) and secretary. he does half the work around the office (maybe more) and lives with skeptic. he complains and protests and threatens to quit, but its all bark. hes very loyal. to his own frustration.

now im going to be honest. hunted is Super difficult to put in this au. given his role as a fight or flight, base animal instinct type, he cant be fit into an au like this very easily. ive considered a hunter, but that doesnt fit him at all. so. im a hack and i should delete my tumblr.

but no seriously hunted is very difficult. ALSO. THE NARRATOR. ive been thinking if i should add him and how prevelant he should be and what he would be like. if he should be in the bar or if skeptic would need to meet him somewhere else. maybe hes the villain ykno. but im. not sure and i dont wanna make the whole thing Too big ykno. i swear its not just bc i dont like him (joke (hes fun to hate (but also i hate him), i genuinely am stuck on what to do with him.

anyways. thats pretty much it. i dont wanna derail this post with. yaoi ramblings. so ill keep it close to my chest. also b4 u ask, im. not going to make this a fic or anything. i dont have the energy for something like this and im not very. good at writing longform anyway. i much prefer tiny drabbles. and anyways, its kinda. rlly unfinished cuz ive been too busy thinking too hard about minor details.

listen to 3 time tony winner, broadway classic, city of angels with music by cy coleman, lyrics by david zippel, and book by larry gelbart. thanks.

I ALMOST FORGOT. theyre still birds 💜. yayyyy 💞

[oh-no-its-bird]

TORA AU TIME YES ITS THAT TIME OF YEAR AGAIN !!!

Ok so first, quoting this from a previous tora au post:

Personal take here: I don't think Itachi likes being in charge! That boy is a born, built, and bred shinobi who follows what he is told to a perfect T, no matter how blatantly horrifically awful the order is! Even if hates it with all of his heart! He'll still fucking do it! And then only blame himself for it and not the guy who fucking ordered it! Because he'll still obey that guy after! Which also adds another fun layer of irony bc hes supposed to be clan head one day! To me, Itachi is a fascinating subject of having an unshakable, unbreakable iron will— and also having absoloutley no spine To be fair tho was also like. Fuckin 13. He was fucked up and was tricked at a very, very young age and unfortunatley that one mistake came to chain him to that one specific way of thinking. If he came to grow out of that way of thinking, he'd first have to admit he'd made a mistake, which wasn't gonna happen bc it was too late for regrets. But anyways: With Tora here Itachi has another "voice of reason" to help steer him away from other voices who might otherwise bind him. There isn't as much pressure on only him + Shisui to here and now choose what they (and only they) will choose to do to save the entire clan or Konoha Tora is a natural leader and quick to take charge, and Itachi is ok with that. When Itachi chooses to speak, he is listened to carefully and his opinions are taken seriously, which is all he can ask for tbh. Otherwise he's allowed to sit there and look pretty till given a nice, neatly wrapped plan approved by 2 people he can really, truly trust. So he's doing a bit better mentally than canon Anyways, in this AU I think Itachi should actually get to semi-retire as a shinobi and actually Sasuke gets to be clan head bc his brother ain't built for it. Plus it can play more into the stuff I was talking ab earlier about Sasuke struggling a lot more than those around him to learn different stuff (sealing especially) only to come out as one of the most terrifying in what he eventually masters. Let the second son inherit!! Let Sasuke have a defining character moment where he decides he wants to help guide the clan, and he's forced to kind of get over his brother worship to confront Itachi to say he doesn't think he'd make the best clan head. And Itachi let's out this sigh of relief he did not know he has been holding for his entire life and tells Sasuke he's proud of him.

With that in mind ^

I think the ultimate ironic pairing for the finale of the Tora AU would be Tora and Itachi ending up together, but with Itachi as the retired ninja housewife and Tora the big boi breadwinner

The ultimate fuck you twist call back to all Tora's parents talk of Tora needing to find a "good man to take care of you" + irony from them originally cheering Tora on when they learned he and itachi were friends bc they thought he'd snag him as a husband and the culmination of Itachi's "I don't really want to be in charge actually" arc

I love a full circle !!

Sasuke is Itachi's best man and Shisui is Tora's and Kakashi gets to walk Tora down the isle instead of his parents who he has no real attachment to

Actually POV I fucking kill off the Haruno's and Tora and Sakura have to deal w the death of their parents, who they both had very complicated relationships with but relationships nonetheless

Mmm I kinda like that, putting that in my back pocket for now

I honestly don't even know how the romance would happen, tbh I'm not the biggest romance fan but I just love the progression of it in the narrative. I think it'd be a cool end to their story, I'll sweat the little details later

Maybe they aren't even in love fr fr

Oh my god wait no hear me out

HEAR ME OUT

Itachi getting out of being clan head via marrying Tora. Don't ask me how this works. They aren't even like in love or anything but Itachi is using Tora as a political shield to fuck off and enjoy his housewife retirement actually.

Tora is similarly using this for one of his infamous political plots somehow, it's all part of his master plan and as usual itachi is just happy to go along for the ride

,,,the perfect queer platonic besties end to their arc ,, I love it this is my new ideal endgame

Sasuke drops that he's gonna fight Itachi to be clan head and Itachi one ups him by going "oh cool. Guess I don't need to marry Tora then."

Queue Sasuke spit take "You don't need to WHAT"

"Yeah we were gonna get married as part of a 10 step plan to help Tora take over the clan council + get me out of being clan head by abusing some old laws Tora found."

"??????????"

"I guess I'll tell Tora we don't need to do it anymore. I'm happy for you, little brother."

"???????????????????"

Anyways yeah, thinking ab tora au again.

I just finished re-reading my vault fic chapter for it and am having Thoughts(tm)

[yuenthevoices]

Okay so I haven't seen Transformers One yet (just had midterms) but honestly from the bits i've seen of it - from movie clips on tiktok to some of the hilarious promo stuff they have Bee do - i'm ABSOLUTELY in love with it. some of my favorite stuff i've seen are the little, more niche details i don't see enough of that really show how much care has actually been put into the movie. don't worry, no spoilers for the actual movie - mostly about official promo clips and such.

for example, i saw a bit of an interview where it's said the animation team all grew up with transformers, and were even fighting to animate their favs. there was also another interview i saw where someone - i believe a story boarder/director - seemed genuinely pretty sad that they couldn't do the Megatron gladiator and Orion Pax archivist backstories because it would make the movie too long. like, there is just so much genuine love for the franchise that makes the movie so good and so interesting its crazy like ahduaogeuaisahe

alright alright so enough of my rant i know some of y'all are here for the x reader stuff soooo here's some TF One headcanons! also do keep in mind that this is from my very limited knowledge of the movie characters so prob oc? if they were to somehow meet humans

B-127 (Badassatron)

first off, he's such a silly guy and so adhd coded

but honestly, as a human, be just a bit careful around him, seeing as he accidentally knife-handed quite a few people, and some on purpose

he'd either be as clumsy as he is with his friends that he built, or would literally be too scared to get within touching distance of a human

if you want to get closer to him, honestly just listen to him - with some small input here and there to show you're listening - and he'd want to hang around you a lot more

really, just be nice, don't baby him, and let him yap as much as he wants - bonus points if you sometimes yap to him as well, i'm sure he'd be a great listening, with a lot of input from him, of course

Elita One

honestly, i wish i knew or could tell more about her, but any clips or trailers i've seen her in are pretty limited glimpses into her character

the trait i see the most from these glimpses however, is how she's ambitious and diligent

she'd probably respect you a great deal if you're as ambitious and diligent as she is, and would probably be a bit proud if you compliment her work ethic as well

i think she'd like someone who matches her, aiming for higher goals with the work and strength to prove it - especially since you're a human

bonus points if you can kick ass as well

D-16

similar case to Elita, except i think i have a bit more to go off of, considering how much he shows up in promo trailers and stuff

honestly, kinda hard for me to say?

again, i think he'd appreciate someone similar to him, considering how much time he spends with orion, it'd be a nice change of pace

someone who won't take bs, maybe a teeny bit of malicious compliance, and someone who doesn't try to hide their opinions

considering how mush shit miners seem to take from those who can transform, seeing someone else - especially some smaller, squisher being - being proactive and not taking shit, he'd probably be interested

Orion Pax

ok so only doing orion pax and not optimus prime because in total i've only seen like 3 clips of him as optimus soooo yea

i could see him with a jokester kind of person, but also with a more calm caretaker kind of person as well

being a jokester with him would be fun, and he'd probably have no problem with carrying you around to places for plans

being a calm caretaker would possibly be a little more stressful, but still fun with him nonetheless

either way, he'd still be somewhat careful, keeping in mind that he is much larger and sturdier than humans are

just don't play dead on him please, he'd genuinely freak out and run you over to D-16 and ask him what's wrong (D-16 probably won't find it nearly as funny lol)

[sanjisboyfie]

one piece smau: dating sabo edition

liked by sabosbf, kokoala, and 10k others

[name]sblondie: this is exactly why im always late to work

tagged: sabosbf and d.dragon

sabosbf: DONT TAG YOUR BOSS????? HES GONNA FUCKING KILL ME??????

-> kokoala: LMFAOAOOA

-> sabosbf: i'm fuckin scared what is going on koala

d.dragon: This is hardly an acceptable reason to be late to work, Sabo.

-> [name]sblondie: boohoo just say youre sad and single

-> divaiva: SABO you're so dead.

freeluffy: cuddling is worth it

[liked by d.dragon, kokoala, and 200 others]

-> kokoeala: just heard dragon-san gasp in his office hold on u might be saved

-> [name]sblondie: thankgodthankgodthankgod

-> freeluffy: huh?

liked by [name]sblondie, divaiva, and 18k others

sabosbf: he's urethral guys idk

tagged: [name]sblondie

[name]sblondie: i think you're urethral too baby

-> sabosbf: i love u i knew u would get my humor

-> [name]sblondie: of course i would my love <333

portgasace: no fucking way u two are real

dni_nami: something is telling me theres something wrong with the caption, but lemme not

-> sabosbf: what's wrong with it :0?

-> dni_nami: ....

divaiva: u two are the cutest (please change that caption, i'm telling you this out of the kindess of my heart)

[liked by kokoala, portgasace, and 140 others]

-> [name]sblondie: my boyfriends caption is perfectly fine

liked by [name]sblondie, sabosbf, and 19k others

portgasace: barfed in my mouth i hate them

tagged: [name]sblondie and sabosbf

[name]sblondie: be nice to ur brother in law damn

-> freeluffy: [NAME] IS OUR BROTHER IN LAW NOW !?!?!?!?

-> [name]sblondie: future* brother in law my bad

-> freeluffy: booooo :(

sabosbf: yeah i hate u too ace, the only rzn u ever go out w us is so u can leech off our wallets

-> portgasace: thats a fuckign lie asshole

-> sabosbf: BROKE ASS

[liked by [name]sblondie, freeluffy, and 100 others]

boahancock: luffy's brother and luffy's brothers boyfriend are so cute <3

-> [name]sblondie: damn she don't even know our names

-> portgasace: professional luffy dickrider (for some rzn)

kokoala: my favorite gays <3333

-> [name]sblondie: ?????

-> sabosbf: thank u koala ;)

-> [name]sblondie: ???????

liked by sabosbf, portgasace, and 20k others

[name]sblondie: guys do u think he loves spiderman more than me

tagged: sabosbf

sabosbf: if peter parker hit my line, im sorry

-> [name]sblondie: ????????

sabosbf: his theme song is my ringtone for u so i guess it connects?

-> [name]sblondie: YOU GUESS???

-> sabosbf: that just means ur my spiderman baby >///<

-> [name]sblondie: DONT TRY TWISTING THIS IN A COMPLIMENTARY WAY U JUS CONFIRMED THAT IM UR SECOND CHOICE

kokoala: spiderman >>>> any other man

-> sabosbf: u get me koala ughhh

portgasace: good taste [name], gooooddd tasteee

-> sabosbf: hehe

-> [name]sblondie: WHAT THE FUCK????????? STOP FLIRTING WITH OTHER MEN RIGHT NOW???

liked by [name]sblondie, divaiva, and 16k others

sabosbf: got jumpscared by this pic in my cameraroll pls someone buy this guy brown contacts

tagged: [name]sblondie

[name]sblondie: me looking at u when u wake up 🧿🧿

-> sabosbf: its ok babe jus please maybe think about blinking a little bit longer

kokoala: cannot hold a conversation with him without feeling like hes thinking about murdering me

-> portgasace: what i said

divaiva: nooo you'd ruin his natural beauty :<

-> [name]sblondie: thank u iva <3

-> [name]sblondie: YOU JUST VENMOED ME 40 BUCKS WITH THE MSG "listen to [name]" ???

-> sabosbf: LMFOAOA babe don't actually buy contacts i love ur eyes theyre pretty :3

d.dragon: They are quite terrifying.

[liked by kokoala, divaiva, and 90 others]

liked by sabosbf, kokoala, and 19k others

[name]sblondie: boyfriend appreciation post because even though hes got a weird sense of humor, hes still mine (...i guess)

tagged: sabosbf

sabosbf: HEHEHE he loves meeeeee

sabosbf: ok why that ugly ass photo of me as the second one what the hell is wrong w u u just hate me

sabosbf: I LOVE U SABO, LOVE UUU

-> [name]sblondie: love u too handosme (...i guess)

-> sabosbf: STOP WITH THE I GUESS i'd choose u over peter parker anyday baby pleaseee

portgasace: not [name] picking up on me and luffy's appetite too

[liked by kokoala, [name]sblondie, and 100 others]

-> freeluffy: bigger appetite is the best appetite !

sabosbf's story

RESTRAIN ME??? MY SEXY BOYFRIEDN IN MENSWEAR HOLY SHIT IM CREAMINNNNGGGG

[name]sblondie replied to your story: u shouldve told me sooner, i'll wear them more often now just for u babe ;)

[wispythreads]

The Lair of the Shadowbroker DLC definitely earned its fan praise, in my opinion. This feels like Mass Effect 1 level of artistry and level design, I love it.

There were like, way too many enemies, and I still don't really feel great about how they changed Liara in just a two year time gap between the games, but I appreciate the way this DLC handled it, it made an effort that resulted in her feeling more like how she felt in the first game.

The scene after Tela got revealed as the one who had been trying to murder Liara at the start of all this was rough, Shepard and her slipping off the window ledge, falling together, slowed down only by Tela's biotics until she shoves Shepard the rest of the way to the ground, while she gets to gently float down to make her escape. That impact looked like it HURT, especially with how much effort she had to put into getting back up again.

Shepard honestly sounded so grumpy and dejected as she said "I'm okay, by the way, thanks for asking." before hopping into the car with Liara.

And speaking of the car, I loved the banter between Liara and Shepard the whole way through, but particularly during the car chase, which was really fun! "Head on Collision!" - Liara "I hear that's bad for people." - Shepard. All the little bits of back and forth were so great to listen to, wouldn't mind replaying just for that bit of the DLC alone.

The actual Lair itself was so so so pretty.

The boss fight against the Shadowbroker is probably my favorite across all all of Mass Effect 1 and 2? Especially with the cutscenes where Shepard realizes ah ok ammo won't do anything that's fine I'll just punch him

Really cool alien design too.

Mini thoughts from snooping on my squadmates dossiers below.

Straight up chortling over Mordin and Kirrahe's bickering and how it is preserved in their mission report He really should've realized something was going to be up on Maelon's end... Nice of them to try and shelter him from any repercussions for his outburst, but he needed followed up on much sooner than when Mordin thought he'd been kidnapped. The list of threat analysis against all the other main species holy- not surprising, honestly, based on what is known about Salarians, but still pretty interesting ... So not only is he a musical enthusiast in his spare time but also a Bill Nye the Science Guy type? That's neat. Good for him.

I hope we get to reunite Jack with her mom. That would be nice.

LEGION IS A GAMER I love this little cluster of AI so much. He has so many infractions on that online game that technically are true due to the fact that he's. Not an organic being. But the only one that sticks is him taunting other players- that's so silly aww… he bought the highest (and most likely most expensive) version of a game that was fundraising for the events of Eden Prime, just for the fundraiser. He did not play that game at all. He even tried a dating simulator oh my gosh. I don't think he's hopeless =( what a mean ranking for a dating sim. He's spent so much time on it, too… (not as much as the other games, but still a significant time investment my gosh)

ahhh this is where Grunt's fanon characterization of being Shepard's son starts coming in. I do think the main game version of him and his relationship with Shepard, a paragon!Shepard at that, is interesting, but it wasn't lining up with what I was seeing online. (and by main game version I mean the transition of [Talking about how great it is we've got so many strong enemies to fight against] "I don't plan on living like this forever" "Talk like that and it won't be your choice. I'm sure as hell not quitting with a whimper. Just so you're clear where we stand." [Hyper aggressive and enjoying memories of gruesome kills] "I'm not sure I want to keep coming down for these talks..." "Whatever. Don't have to be friends to be allies." [Still hyper aggressive and enjoying memories of gruesome kills] "Y'know, I kind of thought connecting with your past would bring stability." "Ha! See, now we're having fun. Me remembering good deaths, and you with your... funny human thing you're doing.") I think there is something very sweet about him being enamored with dinosaurs and looking up to Shepard so much that he wants to know about the whole of Humanity's history as warriors :')

The transmission between Samara and her daughters... all the things she had to give up in order to become a Justicar...

!!! THANE GET THE LUNG TRANSPLANT YOU HAVE A SON YOU NEED TO CONNECT WITH AND I CARE ABOUT YOU SO MUCH DON'T JUST GIVE UP AND DIE IN A YEAR!! LIVE! LIVE AS A PERSON AND NOT A WEAPON!! I love how his kill methods are so elaborate and the alternate methods are equally intricate, with the Krogan's main method understandably being the most involved and calculated. And then you get to their alternate method and it's just one word. It gives this impression of hands to his head exhausted and resigned.

... Garrus's family… his mom…. god that's hitting a little too close to my heart....

[koolades-world]

hello sorry if your requests are closed pls feel free to ignore this if they are :(

i just got this nice idea and wanted to share it and maybe you could do hc idkkkk anywayy !!

so imagine a mc but they're a poc (black, asian, whatever) and they always felt kinda like an outcast in the human world bc they lived in a white neighbourhood and now they're in the devildom and... wow Mammon, Simeon, Mephisto ?! (and maybe Dia and Raphael too cuz they can be mixed or something)

Like I am japanese and I live in europe and in my whole life I've interacted with like 3 or so poc ?? That's sooo little! I would be overjoyed to meet people (demons) that aint white- there is some common experience shared with all poc and i just need that 'bound' with someone lool

Anyway sorry this kinda sounded like a rant by the end but yea! even if you don't do it its ok! Have a nice day and ily !/p ♡

hello!! of course :)

i only moved once when i was younger but both neighborhoods were predominantly white, and i don’t think I’ve ever had a close poc friend that wasn’t an online friend. in middle and elementary i was one of like three or four pocs. high school was better but since I was a magnet kid, i always saw the same people and they were majority white. I’m almost certain I was the only mixed one in that program

bottom line, i can relate haha

enjoy <3

Poc Mc and the poc boys

poc solidarity!

of course the first demon you see is Diavolo, and while you don’t trust him right off the bat because you’ve just been basically abducted for this program, it’s nice to see a poc in charge

since mammon is assigned your caretaker, of course you’re quick to form a friendship

when he learns about your childhood since that comes up at some point, he goes oddly silent and listens carefully when you tell your stories

eventually he himself opens up a little about what it was like in heaven and his experience

gonna break format for a minute, simeon and I would be such good friends, besties even. a writer, very kind, a great baker and cook, a great fashion sense, and he looks like me? omg sign me up we’re twins. there is such a thing as two pretty best friends lol

simeon is so naturally effortless but sweet, so it wasn't hard to become his friend

he's more than happy to help you where ever needed

after you get over the whole kidnapping thing, you become fast friends with dia because he's just so wonderful to be around

and he's more than happy to be your friend because the poor guy doesn't have enough. he'll take you to do all sorts of fun stuff and even if your pictures together end up everywhere online, he doesn't care

you also are a little reluctant to warm up to mephisto because of what lucifer had said about him, but diavolo spoke highly of him, so you spent a couple afternoons with him

and you found yourself very interested in him and the rad newspaper, left wondering why lucifer hated him so much

if you want, you're more than welcome to help out and of course receive credit where credit is due

it was also kind of intimidating to get close to raphael too since he seemed so tough and unapproachable, but he was actually great to have a late night talk with and helped you out with any kind of fashion dilemma

maybe the devildom isn't so bad after all...

[haveihitanerve]

Yet another one- You guys know the drill :) :

Sams appreciative smile of Tom’s introduction of the idea of what they're doing, amazing supportive friendship

“One man, six strangers” This audience member is fun!!! “I've seen that video1” Tom help-

“Theres only thhhreee people up here” yes good math Tom, very nice

“Bilbo Baggins finds a diamond.” “Strong rip-off vibes there” tom i cant

“The confused racist panda” the confused raci- wh-whatttt

“You lost us right in the middle there.” thank you for showing it with your hands Tom, i really needed that actually

“You get three very white guys on stage and go “lets talk racism” it doesn't end well.” With you three i think it might, but fair point- also i thought he was just grabbing a drink- wheres luke??? 😭

“Is that from Twin Towers guy?” ok i didn't see the first half of the show- but thats an insane way to be categorized/known, also AJ fucking losing it is always a gem, love that

Even sam had to hang his head for that one lmao what did you do twin towers guy???

“The excited chinchilla?” Glances around at Sam and AJ. “What do you guys like so far?” Genuinely my heart omg-

“I like the excited chinchilla- what does that, what does that look like exactl-” AJ you better be asking about what the scene could possibly look like and not what the animal-

“What does a chinchilla look like?” AJ please 😭

Also just to mention- when he started speaking Tom pointed to him and idk but it made something inside me smile so… mentioning it…. moving on

“Its like a cute little-” forms a ball with his hands. I gotta say Tom, thats pretty accurate. “Gerbil-y sort of thing.” Sam finishing his sentence i cant 😭

Also if Tom keeps pointing to them like that i might actually lose it-

“What he said.” I love them so much and i don't even know why this sentence specifically made me scream that but um… yeah

Sam and AJ just standing up, trying to figure out wtf they're gonna do…hoping inspiration will come from being elevated or smth ig

“You know some people get a dog i guess.” AJ i fucking love you-

His shrug also- cutest thing i've ever seen in my life

Ok idc where this relationship goes- but Sam and AJ being in love is rarely a thing and i didn't know how much i needed it until now but its adorable- Sam has the sweetest smile and AJ genuinely looks afraid of this nonexistent chinchilla but calmer the closer Sam gets and ahhhhh

Also sam talking about children😭i know they’re fake but planning a future together- my heart-😭

- i genuinely did not see Tom coming- XD losing my lung rn laughing what- and he does the raspy worker dude voice so well- help

“Thanks dad.” AJ marry me rn.��

HE EVEN CAUGHT SAM OFF GUARD!!!!!

“...chinchilla.” The way he said that- wh-sir why??? 

Sam and AJ are both also caught off guard- oh this is gonna be a fun one i can tell- literally both breaking together at Tom’s strange growl 

“Was this your idea?” Perfect gruff disapproving dad Tom, 10/10

“One moment sweetheart.” yes yes!!! Protect your daughter, take aside the boyfriend/husband???-it hasn't been established yet- and then… idk what actually but yes i love how gentle he was to AJ lol

“Listen i like you, yeah?” The audience understands lmaooo!! Sam thats never a good sign, run

Tom breaking- his little peek at AJ and then having to cover his mouth to hide his smile Ahhhhhhh so cute!!!

OH!!! He looked over because AJ was laughing at him- got it!!!

*AJ playing with the chinchilla* thank you captions- but im pretty sure that was just him almost dropping it-

“I think you've made a mistake here-” AJ wheezing

“Don't look at her-” “i love her!” THATS LOW SAM!!! THATS LOW!!! HE WASN'T TALKING ABOUT HIS DAUGHTER- HE WAS TALKING ABOUT THE CHINCHILLA!!!! WOWWWWWW

Ok im better now (fuckin hilarious also sam, stellar)

“Shh-shhhut up.” we always love the drawn out shhhhut up

“I don't mean my daughter,” thank you for clarifying tom

AJ is running out of things to do lmaooo- holding it up to the light, turning in a circle, ah zabenya-ing it

“Just keep your door locked at night yeah?” TOM WHAT THE FUCK DOES THAT MEAN??? HELLO????? I was not informed this was a horror story-

Sam is equally as confused as to where hes taking this- oh hes miming now

“At the bottom of your door you've got a- one of the draft excluders” tom what does that mean 😭

“I hope im overthinking this” you are, you so are, but i cant wait to see where this goes- oh my gods

“Keep your eyes open. Especially when you’re sleeping..” okkkk thats creepy and totally normal and what a father in law totally says-

AJ is tired of being a side character- lovely “boy chat??” idk what his hand movements are but im loving it

Sam side eyeing Tom is amazing

“You remember-” that lunge forward is worse than anything a chinchilla can do tom what- 

Also Sam and AJ breaking, they did not see that coming’

“They can feel you breathing… they can always feel you breathing.” Ok thats ominous but also why do i feel like thats a random fact that Tom learned about chinchillas that hes adding into the story??? Idk seems like a thing they can do, and a thing hed know, and a thing hed do

Sam perplexed beyond reason how they're gonna make this a functioning scene

“Maybe in the war.” *shrugs casually* AJ!!! SIR what do you mmmmmeannnnnnnn  in the war????? What

Sam also almost breaking and AJ casually laughing because whatttt did he just say how are they furthering this plot

also off topic- the little tongue in the cheek movement is great, lovely, top notch, idk love it

AJ biting his lip and needing to look away so that he doesn't completely break is my everything

“You're an accountant, I’m a lawyer.” thank you for giving us backstory Sam, greatly needed

“Falling in love with you was the best thing I ever did.” ……. SIR. How am I ever gonna find someone if you’re pulling these lines on your fucking friend while doing an improv show- 😭 the standards are too high already-

The kiss 😭

Sam’s squint at Tom like “what the fuck are you- what are we doing here? Do i move in- was that stagecraft?- what??” 

His shrug of “oh well fuck it I guess.” and moving a chair into scene while still shrugging at Tom bc he has no idea what to do

Sam repeating back all of Tom’s words in a slightly different font because he wants Tom to have control of the scene- and he has no ideas- 

AJ looking between them and doing three pretty blinks as he pieces together the story

“Gavin…” *nervous chuckle* “obviously theres a difference.” please tell him Tom, we’re all dying to know, him especially

“Ckkk” what does that mean Tom 😭i thought it meant castration at first but now???

AJ stepping forward- wanting to join the scene but he’s still not entirely sure wtf is going on and three confused scene partners is a recipe for disaster- and oop Tom has an analogy maybe wait-

“Let me finish the sentence.” the pose Sam does- help-

AJ’s slow smile as Tom continues the bad analogy

“Of course.” Sam you’ve never “ckk”ed anything what do you mean of course

“What you've done-” AJ’s little lean back and victorian hand over mouth chuckle is my favorite thing in the world he does it so much and it kills me every time its so cute

Sam loosing it- and Tom breaking on stage!!! Thats something you don't see often!!

“Venomous” VENOMOUS???? THATS THE METAPHOR??? IT ISN'T ONE????

Oh nevermind its still a metaphor

The brainstem????? Thats what “ckkk” is?????

Im so confused help 😭

Tom’s spin in the chair is hilarious- peak comedy truly

“Can you imagine an unsnipped chinchilla???” I can now??? ALso both Sam and Tom breaking again, beautiful

“Have you ever seen a Rhino with a gun?” wtf??? “No??!?!” “thats the only thing i can compare this to Gavin!” I love how he keeps casually dropping in Gavin while Gavin has yet to name him

“How'd you just come in through the back of the store?” i see stagecraft is at play

AJ also knew it was coming but laughed anyway-peak

“Thats the least of your worries right now.” yes Aj, flip it on him!!! King

“Just on-just one!” Tom sounds genuinely afraid this is golden

Oh ma gods- the way AJ’s scream cuts off perfectly and he and Tom just relax the second Sam cuts off the scene is perfect

“Captain.” wait a damn minute- Captain??? Captain of the Police Force??? Not KING???? anyway-

“Five thousand people died.” damn. damn

also Tom laughing in the background, legs crossed and fingers steepled against his chin in proper Tom pose- i adore

“Theresa may.” Audience member i love you

And the way the roll with it too- gads i love them

Sam finally breaking when AJ actually “calls” Theresa May

Tom resigning himself to play Theresa

None of them knew where they were going except Tom but they all wanted to create a scene- loving the chaos- lukeeeee 

That door creaking sound was a masterpiece and idk about you but Sam is a positively fucking terrifying chinchilla omg-

“Gary…” that audience member is losing her mind at his name being gary and i adore that for her

“Do you remember me from ZE WARRRRR!!!” the chinchilla asked calmly

“NO ONE CAN STOP ZE NAZI CHINCHILLAS!!!” Ok sam, praise, i love you, but why does it always come back to Germans??? There are more than just the one-two wars 😭like he could've created a fake one??? Nevermind its not important its the funniest one and maybe he’s just holding space for luke

AJ laughing as he dies via chinchilla is crazy

Killing him again is low but necessary lol

AJ losing it even more is a joy XD

I gotta say, very impressed with Sam’s pronunciation and then gibberish of german

AJ trying to clear the stage but Tom just stays fucking spread on the floor lmaooo

“Hold please.” AJ what???? Hes enjoying himself and being chaotic as always but what??? 😭XD

“I can hear you doing motions but this is a phone call so…” yes AJ!!!! Call him out!!!! XD glorious!!!

“With my man.” AJ i think ur in the clear to give him a name- i don't think its been done- but playing it safe, i see- even though its never stopped you before, giving someone two names but like wtv thats not my business-

Sam just messing with Tom’s arm/hands (making him slap himself) even though AJ specifically pointed out it was unnecessary but we love an annoying king- and dragging him around by his hair lol

Paella??? Is this a call back??? Its only the short story, but im assuming AJ’s being a lil bitch and making Tom say paella again- also Sam’s “squid” motion for Tom was brilliant XD

Sam dropping his head on Tom’s shoulder to laugh- my heart

“Im glad to hear I sound normal to you.” 

“Hang up ze fucking phone!!!” 

“Everything okay?” the switch from chinchilla to Sam gave me whiplash hang on-

“Did he?” “yeah yeah yeah.” “...did he?” Genuinely curious- did he? “Well he said the word.” Aj i love you

“Where its gone.” Im sorry but they said it in sync and together in harmony and like obvi but it just gives me joy anyway-

“Fuck we should probably look for it shouldn't we?” yeah just maybe AJ. 

“Ill go down to the basement..” they both knows what gonna happen. “And see if its there.” both break. “What could go wrong?” thanks for saying the classic foreboding everything-will-now-go-wrong phrase sam

AJ’s shrug is such a mood i love him

“Ill see you upstairs.” “maybe.” if AJ doesn't die now I want a refund-

Tom: ominous basement noises

“Thats the music to the scene-” yes AJ, its like in movies- you don't address it!

“I already turned zis light on.” sorry sam but i thought the “chch” was the sound of a gun cocking-

“Hello cecily.” well thats terrifying-

“Franz Haberburg.” we get a Tom smile!!!! And AJ breaks as well, so cute

“The door is pretty closed and soundproof.” Sam what??? Poor Aj is gonna die XD- also AJ’s little laugh is my life

“HUSBAND! HU-HUSBAND!!!” “you don't seem to know his name.” XD Give the poor man a break Sam, hes been bullied for not remembering names enough times-

“I call him husband thats what we do its a cute thing.” AJ- still don't think he’s been named yet so you're free but like i respect it

“Who are you- well i know who you are- but what are you doing in my basement!” Now hes asking the real questions

“Until 1939.” the way Tom covers his mouth with his fingertips every time he laughs off stage gives me life- only the fingertips too- not the whole hand its- anyway

“What do you- what do you mean?” Aj breaking and Tom still laughing- asking the real questions now

“But it just wasn't racist enough-” Tom, previously: three white guys on stage, lets talk about racism, yeah, good idea

Why are they making the chinchilla- you know what i don't want to know the thought process- also Tom’s delight as hes watching is everything so its fine

“Your father is dead.” The audience who already knew this: *dramatic gasps* YES!!!! Finally a good audience who does all the proper dramatic gasps!!!

Dead tom enters the scene again!

“Have you ever zeen ze film terminator?” AJ’s back caving with a laugh, Tom twitching with laughter and Sam breaking mid sentence- i love these stupid goobers

Also the way AJ is gently cupping Tom’s neck-

“But no every single *grows quieter* chinchilla is a *laughs* nazi” AJ breaking- i love this skit omg XD-

“I-it-s im just stalling” good work AJ- very smooth, the audience has no idea. 

Aj actually stumbling when Sam ducked- and the sound his arm made is crazy(also the way he checked to make sure he wouldn't actually hit Sam- my heart)

“Sooounnnd.” that was angelic Sam wow

AJ’s slow NPC turn-

“Maybe move on from this bit-” AJ and Sam both breaking- probably wise, honestly

*uncomfortable AJ*

“HUSBAND! HUSBAND!!! THE CHINCHILLAS A FUCKING NAZI!” Sam’s completely break- he did not expect that right out of the gate- (nor did he probably expect AJ to live through the scene but whatever-)

Also tom casually in the corner now because he cant really move theyre in the way so just watching and grinning-

“HE *YOU* VERY VERY NEARLY GAVE ME THE HITLER SPEECH! WE WERE THIS🤏CLOSE!” Sam loosing it- oh and Tom escapes to the back

“AND I ABANDONED THE SCENE!” Aj is just publicly shaming Sam now-

“I GOT OUTTA THERE! BECAUSE I HAD TO!” explaining how tf he made it out of the basement-

“I HAD TO!” wayyyy too close to Sam’s face

“Have some beans” Aj: *rightfully confused because wtf?*

AJ genuinely loosing his shit and doing some strange drinking of beans and stagecraft

TOM AS THERESA!!! SHES HERE TO SAVE THE DAY!!!!

Sam also forgot about that character- or didn't expect Tom to dedicate to actually playing her- XD

AJ CASUALLY HAS A SHOTGUN WHAT-

“Wait-wh- one! Where did you get a gun-” wise questions Sam

“Two- this is the former prime minister. She tried to get the good Brexit deal- why are you pointing a gun at her?” Lmaooo Sam

Tom: *kills himself* Sam: *takes his time to get behind him to pretend like it was him*

“Theresa May is the best Nazi killer in ze world.” all three of them laughing before recovering really fast

XDXDXDXDXD sam having to alternate between his two [personalities- a comforting husband and a nazi chinchilla- what even is their life-

AJ- its a shotgun my love, not a machine gun. Sam- thank you for just staring at him for a few minutes, contemplating whether or not to point it out before ducking under all the bullets- even tho he’s been shooting for a while longer than you ducked, nicely done

“The other one…” AJ has no idea…

“And scene- thank you.” the pure relief-

AJ casually asking Sam if thats his drink before getting his actual drink- they’re so cute

Anyway that concludes todays one- thank you!!!

Also- this show had the best Sam faces- amazed that his besties can be just as unhinged as him sometimes- hes great at the random comments that completely transform a scene (cough cough, disciplinary meeting comments, cough cough) and then does an awesome job at pretending to be shocked/amazed/horrified when the others do the same- its hilarious- anyway thanks for reading!

@dawn-speckled @snek-of-eden hope you guys enjoy!

[atoriv-art]

What's your favorite Nejigaa headcanon?

love when i get these so i get to ramble. thank you so much

well i started to be fond of them as a pairing from the idea of neji finding some solace from his clan issues in suna! he initially started going there as just as extra protection sent by konoha for gaara in whatever diplomatic business he might be on, but eventually gaara starts requesting him specifically because

it gives neji some space from konoha as he knows it stresses him out, and gaara post-chunin exams is someone who really wants to offer others a helping hand when he can

he's fond of him :3 there's some brief panels in chunin exams where you see gaara appearing to be a bit fixated on neji (like he got fixated on sasuke, just to a much lesser extent) and i think that would morph into fondness as he chills out and no longer sees people whose anger he relates to as 'prey', so to speak!

the whole 'you almost killed my teammate' thing wouldn't just go away immediately even if gaara Is friendly with lee, imo neji is the type of person to hold onto those grudges even if lee himself might not, but he's also someone who is very easy to disarm with like... honesty and empathy. and as much as gaara is stone-faced, he is also very much someone who has a lot of both! his Tone initially rubs neji the wrong way because it's just So unfiltered, but it also gets to him because it's impossible to dispute gaara's sincerity when he puts everything so bluntly, yknow? and as someone who grew up hiding or otherwise obscuring many of his true feelings (majorly by necessity, but later on also out of sheer habit), it's a trait that neji finds very very admirable — its part of why i like him with sasuke too, i think neji is drawn to people who are very openly themselves, people whose ideals are impossible to ignore

this got so long (as youd expect.) and definitely strayed from the initial ask so here's a read-more <3

neji fusses over him a lot id say, he comes to think of gaara as a very noble person — someone with power and who is trying to make the world a better place with that power — and he gets protective over people he considers so fundamentally Good. i think it's nice for gaara to have someone like that around (esp divorced from his past, a bond that he's managed to build on his own by his own merits) and it gives him a lot of fondness for neji in return :)

a lot of their rs progression is this back and forth of finding out like, how much the other Feels and how gentle the other can be when not forced into situations that bring out the worst out of them.. i Love the idea of gaara's disposition softening up (being more outwardly sweet, more playful) a lot as he grows closer to people, it's why i like drawing him being so affectionate even though he's so introverted... i think the contrast is cute :-)

i'm also super fond of the thought of them unpacking some of their family troubles together lmao, i think it'd especially be good for gaara as he has a lot to retroactively think about once he's not on survival mode 24/7 and he might benefit from a detached third party as a listening ear — his siblings have their own baggage attached to their father, their mother, and their uncle, after all. and well if anyone knows what it's like to have a complicated family history it's neji :P

also as a bonus. imo temari+kankuro would get along with neji (…after a bit. everyone involved here is a bit of an asshole but that's part of their charm ok.) but kankuro treats him like he's his secret extra sibling. meaning he really likes the guy but also meaning he will not know peace under their roof. they argue about anything and everything

hinata and gaara also get along pretty well despite gaaras Past. mostly because i think hinata should be friends with every autism boy there is (shino. sai. etc) but also because i think the thought of her being like "i know he used to be a serial killer but let's hear him out people can change 🥺 he's so sweet he likes plants" is really funny

[boneyspades]

Making Albums for the sides Part 1:

ok so i said in the past that I wanted to do like album long playlists for the sides so... I guess this is the start of that. Yippee!

so I have this little system to decide what goes into each playlist and that system is three categories as to how they correlate with the side:

1: the song is something I think they'd listen to/something that I think is from their favourite genre of music

2: The songs meaning which correlates with the side in some way

3: The vibes that the song gives

so some I will kinda have a deep explanation for whilst others r just simply "hehe they like this song hehe"

anyways let's get into it

keep in mind I accidentally went passed the usual album length for this one (usually 8-15 songs) but there was so many good songs to put

Remus's Album

🐙The Kind of Mind you'd only find in hell💚

⚠️ This playlist has songs that are really like... loud... as in like harsh sounding loud that could be uncomfortable to listen to with high volume. make sure U listen with a volume that's loud enough to hear, not loud enough to burst Ur eardrums. (also I'm rating this playlist PG 13 cus there's alot of uh.... interesting choices)⚠️

https://open.spotify.com/playlist/1LPkMWHDWeJbp7MEztZpSI?si=K3TsnvGFQ0Op1voVpjGiUQ&pi=IlJ3-_gFR5aWS

↓Analysis type stuff↓

Preview:

Contents:

Forbidden Fruit (The Duke's theme song) -Thomas Sanders

I mean it's very much HIS theme song. like... I don't think I need to explain why it's on here, a nice way to start his album tbh

Staple Tapeworms on My Penis- PASSENGER OF SHIT

Ok everyone lower your volumes for THIS SONG SPECIFICALLY LIKE EVEN I HAVE TROUBLE LISTENING TO IT CUS IT JUST HURTS MY EARS. that being said, I think this song is literally the most Remus song I've ever heard. The harsh sound of it all, the screaming, the lyrics, the fact that its just sounds so disorganised that it just catches you off guard sometimes, THIS SONG IS JUST LITERALLY HIM. this is something he'd blast in the car on field trips. he would ANNOY EVERY SINGLE SIDE AND THOMAS with this song. THEY HATE IT.

Cacao and Cocaine - SOFIA ISELLA

so I said in a previous post how this song is like a really good song for intrulogical, but I felt like this was more of a Remus song than a Logan song. Its about a study where they had locked people in rooms to see how long they could be bored for, with the option to experience electrical shocks if they so choose. I'm pretty sure alot of them did choose the shocks because the boredom was getting too much. this is y I chose this song for the playlist, not only does the lyrics and the song itself feel really intrusive and unsettling, but the study itself feels as if intrusive thoughts were clouding the people's heads. and guess whose literally the embodiment of intrusive thoughts? REMUS. FUCKING. SANDERS. also it does give some vibe of Remus in a sense that he's trying to make Thomas give into his intrusive thoughts to let Remus take control of him.

Guess - Charlie xcx ft Billie Eilish

I think I speak for everyone in the fandom when I say that Remus is a certified BRAT!!!! he listens to the brat album all the time. not to mention he's just a certified slut too/lh. I think this would be one of his favourite songs on the brat album (I could be wrong I haven't listened to the whole album yet don't cancel me please/J) plus I feel like he'd just make jokes about it too like "You wanna guess the colour of my underwear, you wanna know what I got going on down there. is it stained with shit or drenched in piss, blah blah blah blah-" idk

In My Mouth - Black Dresses

Now this one is more about the vibe of the song. idk the songs meaning I forgot to look it up but it gives the vibe of if Remus were to fall in love with someone in an unhealthy amount. like I love soft Remus ships as much as the next guy, genuinely, but also, we've also seen Remus is rather uh.... crazy... to say the least. he'd be the type to do DRASTIC things for love. like some of the lyrics here: "I want you to destroy me so I feel better", "I wanna put you in my mouth, I wanna crush you with my jaws" (now this could be a metaphor but I think he'd like... do it literally), "I wanna fuck our bodies into broken shells I wanna go to hell forever" just- idk, again, it just sounds very intrusive to me

Custer - Slipknot

YOU CAN NOT TELL ME THIS LITTLE TRASH FUCK DOES NOT LISTEN TO METAL. I have a head cannon that he and Virgil used to be like MAJOR besties (before AA) and they'd listen to metal with eachother and even do karaoke nights where they'd just scream metal lyrics and annoy the fuck out of Janus. that's... that's kinda it for this one I just think he'd be a metal head-

I'm Yer Dad - GRLwood

again this one is more like i feel he'd listen to this one, so I don't really have much explanation, besides the fact I feel like he'd just yell out the "and I got a really big dick" part just cus it's funny

Cherry bomb - The Runaways

AGAIN! another song I'd feel like he'd listen to. and I guess the vibe of this song as well. it feels really rebellious, which I think we can all agree Remus is exactly that. I feel like this song is a "LOOK OUT BITCHES IM GONNA DO WHAT I WANT AND IDC WHAT YOU THINK" type of vibe, and Remus literally just... does what he wants despite Thomas's and the other side's discomfort

Touch me I'm sick - Mudhoney

AGAINNNNNNNNNN another song I think he'd like. I just looked up the meaning of the song in the time I'm writing this just so I can talk about this song a little bit more cus I actually really love this song and honestly I didn't really see much, except something about the lyrics. Apparently, it's kinda like a dark humour sarcastic take on issues such as disease and violent woohooing, and Remus is a huge fan of dark humour... as we've all seen-... so yeah, I think this song is definitely a Remus vibe.. (unless it isn't, I found it on wiki so idk if it's really all that true)

Living Dead Girl - Rob Zombie

REMUS LOVES METAL. HE LISTENS TO THIS SONG IM SURE OF IT... that's my whole argument.

Brutus - The Buttress

I LOVE THIS SONG GUYS OMGGGGG. I'm actually pretty happy to talk about this one because not only do I think Remus would love it too, but the lyrics, the vibe, the EVERYTHING. IT'S GIVING RAGE! ITS GIVING ENVY! ITS GIVING "RAAAAH IM GOING TO JEFF THE KILLS YOU"!!! ok FR tho, let's talk about the lyrics first. from listening to it without looking up its meaning, it's got alot of mentions of envy and hate for someone. and now hear me out let me cook. I have a theory, a game theory even/ref, that Remus has some jealousy over Roman because Roman has been kinda deemed as THE creativity by Thomas for a while. I feel because Thomas sees Roman as his Creativity, his hero, his perfect golden side, and he sees Remus as this evil being that should be disregarded, I feel like Remus would eventually try to get rid of Roman so that Thomas would have no choice but to listen to him for creative input: "I've been watching him for my entire life, I hate the air he breathes, his foolish decrees his words so contrived and I hate the way the town's people gather outside. They hang on every breath, Cling to his chest, Home to his heart full of pride". THIS SET OF LYRICS ALONE JUST GIVES THAT VIBE, DOES IT NOT; The townspeople being the sides and Thomas, ROMAN IS LITERALLY THOMAS'S PRIDE?!? CMON PPL!!! UGH I WANNA TALK ABOUT IT MORE BUT IVE ALREADY TALKED ENOUGH BUT THIS WHOLE SONG IS JUST GIVING RAGE/ENVY FILLED REMUS AND I LIVE FOR IT!!! also it's also so fucking good cus the orange side is most likely going to be rage, and I feel like if Orange and Remus were to combine their powers they'd would MOST LIKELY be THE MOST powerful sides.

Missus Piano - Rio Romeo

I think this is more of a "I think the artist give the Remus vibes here" more than the song but just hear me out. I love Rio Romeo!!! their songs have this artistic messiness to it I just love, but like not in a non structured, not mixed, no effort type of way, ykwim? its kinda hard to explain it but it's kinda like a soothing uncanniness? idk. but this song specifically. I LOVE IT OMG I REPEAT IT SO MANY TIMES. so this song is about a man in love with his piano. despite it being worn and out of tune, he cherishes it like it worth all the jewels in the world. It just reminds me of Remus alot. I feel like he sees the beauty in the unloved in a way. examples? MR FUZZY?!? BRO MADE THAT THING OUT OF THE DRAIN OF HIS SHOWER AND HE WAS LIKE "this is my baby and I entrust it to you, virgil :)" and got fucking cryptic when he noticed virgil dropped it in disgust. HE NAMED HIS SHOWER DRAIN JOANNE FABRIC CUS HE THOUGHT IT WAS CUTE. HE LOVES THE UNSETTLING. and I feel this when I listen to this song. alot of people when they hear an out of tune piano may think "oh that sounds creepy" or "oh that sounds awful" but Remus (just like the protag of the song) would be like "wow that sounds so nice :)" in which I kinda agree... depending. out of tune pianos can sound creepy but it kinda gives a sense of nostalgia to me for some reason

Piggy Pie - Insane Clown Posse

REMUS IS A JUGGALO. ITS CANNON. RESOURCE? I MADE IT THE FUCK UP! BUT LIKE CMON!!! INSANE CLOWN POSSE IS SUCH A REMUS BAND!! band? duo? artists? idk what to call them, but really I think he'd just listen to alot of insane clown posse, plus he'd be the type to go and just end conservative lives

To Catch a Predator - Insane Clown Posse

yes. another insane clown posse song. I was telling myself "ok let's not have alot of the same artist in one playlist" but uh.... there's three total ICP songs in this one.... so uh... hope you guys like rapping clowns! anyways, basically the same as Piggy pie, in the sense that I think he'd like this song, but also I feel like the chorus itself is a very Remus lyric: "I'm probably gonna burn for this, there's no lesson to learn from this, there's nothing imma earn but it sure is fun". I feel like this is Remus's mindset whenever he chooses to mess with Thomas with his intrusive thoughts. like it could put Thomas is such high amount of danger and he'd be like "oop I might die from this but this is so fun hehe:)" like ykwim?

My Axe - Insane Clown Posse

ok guys stop throwing your tomato's please. I get it. three ICP songs I know you're probably sick of it. but this song is again, a song Remus would listen to AND relate to. The axe in this song could be like his Mace/morning star/whatever and I feel like he'd have a deep connection with it to some extent, I mean, he's probably killed so many ppl with it, why wouldn't he?

Unpunishable - Ethel Cain

Ok I'm really excited to talk about this one. so originally I wasn't gonna put this song here but I looked up the meaning of the song. Its about embracing your desires despite the social pressure to conform. now on the surface it seems alot more like a Janus song but think of it this way. "Desires that are forbidden" Remus is he embodiment of forbidden creativity. in DWIT, virgil and Patton really thought that the reason the Remus was apart of Thomas was because that Thomas REALLY had the desire to do the things he was thinking about all thanks to Catholic guilt. also I kinda found this song from an animatic which was literally about Remus i forgot their user tho IM SORRY 😭😭😭 but yeah, it also gives vibes of the end of WTIT where he was pushing Logan to snap at him, trying to make Logan give in to his forbidden thought of "I shouldn't feel anything." type thing yk?

Two Trucks - Lemon Demon

Remus LOVES this song. this is another song he'd blast during car trips, but he'd be like "BOOOOOOO BORIIING" at the two trucks holding hands part, Patton loves it tho... well... until it goes back into the trucks fucking-

Killing in the name - Rage against the Machine

Another song I think Remus would love. it's mostly just I think he likes metal. is this song metal? idk. but anyways. I think this also has the rebellious vibe to it to that Remus has. like the "fuck you I won't do what you tell me" lyric is what I think Remus's mindset is, he does NOT want to listen to anyone. he just wants to be a dick

Girl Anachronism - The Dresden Dolls

I love this song so much dawg. its just has a really Unhinged vibe to it that just sounds like someone's losing their mind. AND I feel like it kinda captures the frustration Remus has of not being listened to. "Don't call the actors they've seen it all before, they'll say just let her crash and burn. she'll learn, the attention just encourages her" like in DWIT Remus is trying HIS VERY BEST to get Thomas's attention, and Logan saying the best way to deal with Remus is just basically ignore him, like I'd be pretty mad too. I just looked up the meaning of the song and basically it's about a girl whose described as "the world's worst accident" and yk... being labelled the BAD one out of the twins, it kinda fits, don't you think?

Wet - Dazey and the Scouts

GUYYYYYSSSSSSSSS SHUT UP THIS IS MY JAM!!!! I'M IN LOVE WITH THIS SONG CHAT YOU CANNOT FATHOM. ok anyways, this song just gives Remus to me, I'm not sure why. I guess I feel like he'd listen to it, or this might be his sad boy anthem, cus realistically it is quite a sad song. but just idk, it's giving Remus to me for some reason

Ready to Die - Andrew W.K.

we all know where this song is from, chat. we all know it. Ok, so. I feel like Remus would really like this song, not only is it because it's about killing and stuff, but he watched THAT ONE MLP VIDEO and thought "yk what. Roman likes MLP, I think it'd be very funny if I showed him this" spoiler alert, it wasn't. he would also try to ask Patton to make cupcakes with him but Roman would have to be like "NO DO NOT BAKE CUPCAKES WITH REMUS, PATTON." JUST because of that vid. he's afraid. I am too.

HURT - 1 800 PAIN

ok guys U might wanna turn Ur volume down for this song too, it's not as bad as the staple tapeworms on my penis song but it's still a rather harsh sounding song. ok so, I feel like this is just a song that Remus would really enjoy. like he the type of mf to listen to music that just sounds like.... sounds. like really loud irritating sounds. like I like this song too but it's just so NOISEY iykwim

Not My Type: Dead as Fuck 2 - Motionless In White

Ok last song. I. LOVE. THIS. SONG. I don't really have anything really that good to say as to y I put it in this playlist except i feel like Remus and Virgil would really like it. before Accepting Anxiety, I feel like they'd have like matching bios that was just this song? like Virgils would be "Tried out the living but I don't believe the hype" and then Remus's would be "cus if (s)he's got a pulse then (s)he's not my type". also "(s)he loves me cus I give head like a zombie" is something Remus would DEFINITELY say.

should I do more? what side should I do next?