#not that he isnt angry at times but idk
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i feel like todd is less ヽ(`Д´)ノ and more ╯︿╰
#like less grump and more just sad/stressed maybe thats just me tho#not that he isnt angry at times but idk#he looks so upset all the time his forehead is always scrunched up in worry#i feel my definition of what makes a character 'the grumpy one' is not the same as fandom as a whole#asdfghjkl; aw well
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SEVERANCE ✦
#beep boop you want fries with that#in stars and time#isat spoilers#2hats spoilers#loop#siffrin#<- hes very tiny.#idk i just wanted to draw an angry loop and it devolved into this#the composition and everything isnt verygood but i had fun making it so whatever#making bad art is good for the soul 👍👍👍👍👍#once again. happy anniversary to the game that gave me a wonderfully refreshing and soul searching existential crisis.#<- my all time favorite thing for a video game to do to me#this is actually a crop the original image has an even larger amount of negative space. i just wanted to make sif look small.#but it probably makes the comp look like shit. though like i said. making bad art is good for teh soul so idgaf too much#weh.
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maybe its just me but i cant stand when people are like "it just doesn't sit right with me how teruhashi thought about aiura 🥺" like yes... its not supposed to ??? because her thinking badly of other girls and prioritizing male validation over everything is one of her main flaws ??? can we talk about that WITHOUT making it seem like shes not allowed to have a single actual flaw without suddenly becoming an awful person? nobody can handle complex female characters at all and its so fucking annoying
#you guys all missed the point of her development AND her and saiki's relationship development#like did you miss the parts where the only times he genuinely seems to not like something she does is when shes mean to other girls#and he still understands that she isnt a bad person for having bad thoughts in the private comfort of her mind#and besides... in this case she was literally just being a dramatic and insecure teenage girl LMAO#like dont fucking lie to me and tell me when you were her age you didnt have similar thoughts#youre worse than her if you lie about it while judging her for it#sorryyyy#she shouldve been MORE unhinged youre all just cowards#AND ALSO ? how can something even be 'mean' if its just a thought#thats like if u opened ur friends private diary without permission and then unfriended them over something they said in a random upset vent#and in this specific situation if u found out ur friend called someone a bitch because they liked the same person as her ??#LIKE THATS ?? its bad but its not as crazy as you guys make it out to be#shes allowed to be angry and insecure in the privacy of HER OWN MIND#idk if this makes sense but i just feel that her thoughts are more of a concern about her wellbeing than anything else#like she canonically is extremely kind to others even when she doesnt want to be so why are we worried about how she treats others.#theyre fine. im worried about HER.#and WHY her mindset is so negative... but u guys dont give a shit because u cant handle even a spec of complexity#sorry ive said all this before i just like to rant#saiki k#tdlosk#the disastrous life of saiki k.#teruhashi kokomi#meows post
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never understood why jack had a portrait of moxxi up in his casino. the place went under after BL2, and at that point they hadnt been together for years. and its not like what they had together was particularly happy or long lasting, either. they were together for maybe a month before breaking up pre-TPS, and thats not even mentioning what happens between them during the game itself, so... maybe its a trophy? it doesnt feel like one when theres also one of angel. but its all i really got because presumably hes been in a much happier relationship with nisha for years, even though the portrait does feel too sentimental for a woman hes hated for the past Forever. speaking of nisha, there's no portrait of her or his wives. which is doubly weird because surely theyd be here too if moxxi is. idk, moxxi and angel are just a strange pair to have it just be them. by themselves is fine, moxxi alone is easily a trophy. and imo its just weird for a portrait of angel to be in the casino in the first place. some secret siren, huh? but together? idk. it gives mixed messages.
#borderlands#handsome jack#mad moxxi#nisha kadam#angel borderlands#easy answer its a trophy. jacks possessive over them both and its very easy to just say he sees them both as objects to 'keep'.#cracked answer is that its not a trophy because theres no one there to even see it. itd have more fanfare if it was.#hes loud with his hate. he has quite literally never been able to shut up about what makes him angry.#so the portrait in the casino is. well its a tone shift!#idk where im going with this. i dont think jack is “in love” with moxxi nor do i want him to be.#more likley hes holding on to that period of time before everything Went Wrong like with the way he infantilizes angel.#hating the woman she is now but loving what he thought they had before. moxxi says he practically love bombed her when they were together.#this isnt a handsome jack hatepost btw this is a genuine look at why he would do something like this. it interests me.
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i know this has been said 473773474833 times by the kavetham/haikaveh shippers and probably even nonshippers, but i'll say it again. I finally finished the genshin summer event and did the little after quest in sumeru and.....every time kaveh is sneaking around trying not to be noticed coming out of alhaithams house it's just such a gay vibe. he's basically screaming "I can't be caught being gay in a homophobic society!" even if that's not what the game writers are *actually* saying. that's just how it comes off and they can't make it come off any other way. with hoyo's gay history, it makes me wonder if it's on purpose and all a cover-up to have a technically different reason for it so they can get away with it lmao but we will never know.
#lee text#genshins#i can acknowledge how gay they are without liking thr ship#flashback to several kavetham/haikaveh (whatevwr their ship name is) shippers on here attacking me over not liking the ship#trying to “educate” me on why theyre sk gay and why i should ship it#look i didnt say they arent gay af. and these shippers dismissed my feelings completely#i think it was after that one event with the competition thing that kaveh won? idk but just they way they interacted#the way alhaitham talked to kaveh and the way kaveh responded TRIGGERED A TRAUMA RESPONSE IN ME#which made me dislike the ship and their dynamic! i didnt CARE if he was well meaning. the way he talked to kaveh#triggered a fight or flight response in me because it sounded similar to how ive been talked to and kaveh getting upset was similar to#how ive reacted to the same words. you can also argue my family cares about me like alhaitham does kaveh and its how he helps#but it doesnt mean its the kind of help we need and it doenst traumatize us lmao#so i dont get why people were so angry at me for getting triggered by this ship and disliking it for that reason#while i can still admit that they are gay af and seem to get a long a bit better after that and i can tolerate them now#since its been a while and i dont remember it enough to have a trauma response when seeing them anymore lmao#but its just annoying that shippers can be so toxic 💀 they care more about their fictional men ship than me. a real person. weird#not tagging the ship so i dont get more angry shippers in my notes....but they found me last time with no tags so hi. dont yell at me again!#but maybe no one will care since im putting my “anti ship propaganda” in the tags this time and not the main post lmao#just dont read my tags so you dont get mad at me for being uncomfortable by this ship dynamic. but if youre reading this...its too late#leave me alone they arent real and i am so im more important right 😅#let me shame the shippers that dismissed my real feelings because they think their ship is more important than a real person lmao#you cant tell me im wrong when a trauma response isnt a choice and happens against your will 💀#BE ASHAMED YOU NERDS#I WILL BITE YOUR KNEECAPS#sorry i just had to vent lmao
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I once said that I thought Steph would make a great Black Canary, and I still think that's one of the realest takes I've ever had.
Like, this moment seared itself into my head and never faded:
{ Robin 80-Page Giant }
#stephanie brown#dinah lance#spoiler#black canary#me learning about how dinah lost her cry which was as much BULLSHIT as steph's death btw okay hold on i need to get this out of my system#because they had to nerf her SO HARD for that to make sense and it STILL DIDNT BECAUSE ?????? SHE'S THE BLACK CANARY???? THAT GUY WAS A#NOBODY WITH A KNIFE ARE YOU JOKING??? and then the story that follows isnt even really ABOUT dinah it's about ollie and im so. ohhhh my god#JUST like how steph's death was largely brished aside to deal with bruce and jason's angst like. yeah i wanted there to be angst but it#wouldve been nice if it had been about HER for more than five seconds. honestly im so mixed about her death and return tbh. the way they#went about her passing was so weirdly inconsistent through the issues that bruce managing to get her to leslie in time does make sense but#then they do that weird thing with leslie and it's like ???? wha???? i go back and forth on how i feel about steph's return. on one hand i#love how she comes back more focused and stronger largely by her own means but on the other i did want#... something. i wanted her to be angry a bit longer and to deal with the complicated emotions between her 'failing' and bruce's 'failing'#and what that meant for her now. idk i love her batgirl run but it wouldve been nice if she had a bit more space to grieve herself.#anyway later in this issue dinah agrees to mentor steph for a bit and her rules are pretty much the same as bruce's when he made her robin#and if dinah had mentored steph instead of bruce she never would've died ok send tweet#wjshshsk#i love the panels of them looking at each other. dinah looking into steph's eyes and recognising the look in them.#i love how she smiles at stephanie both times. it's so gentle and kind. ily black canary#love posting on blogs where no one follows me. i can just say shit#comic ref#freya talks comics
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"fenris hates on mages relentlessly" dunno man i think he's (usually) being pretty reasonable about it all things considered
#ok there was quite a bit of dialogue after all xd#and its obviously not a new discovery lol just a re-confirmation#hearing so much of it back to back. hes not nearly as accusing or hateful as some ppl like to make it sound???#or well. he def doesnt make a secret out of his distrust/dislike but whenever it comes up he isnt being super unreasonable about it#or even very aggressive honestly? not in party banter at least#(tho he is harsher in some quest dialogue)#laya plays dragon age#sorry was seeing some stuff in the direction of haha broody angry fenris on the dash recently-ish so it came to mind#just really dont get that interpretation of him#(if anything anders is WAY more confrontational and pushy about his views)#(which makes sense! its a pressing and very present matter! but he is quicker to be accusing and less willing to listen)#((also once again disclaimer i am not trying to pit anders and fenris against each other but i Am comparing observations abt them))#((cus common fandom interpretations can be weird idk))#n e ways. enough rambling now its legacy time >:]
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my late grandfather was a poet (and an architect and a teacher and many other things) and i recently found one of his poetry books and I revisited his website and im having so many thoughts
he was a very progressive man, with quite radical left wing politics, despite being a middle class white man raised in the 1940s-50s. he wrote poems about ending wars and freeing palestine and legalising gay marriage. he loved trains and railway infrastructure and every architectural project he worked on he was always thinking about how to make it the most environmentally friendly and accessible. his mantra was ideas procede action and he wrote poems as a way of designing and planning his action. he never thought himself a good poet but he wrote and published dozens of poems anyway because he wanted to show young people the opportunities the late 20th century presented, especially in architecture and design. he loved the stars and the constellations they made and would tell me how to find my way using them when i was a small child.
he was born in england but lived many years in new zealand, and he would write poems about the maori people and the rights they were being denied- still are being denied. he recognised his privilege and he wanted to use it as a way to acknowledge the oppressed and do everything in his power to advocate for them- even if a lot of his writing reflects a now "outdated" way of thinking, even if for his time it was wildly progressive.
he died 8 years ago this month and i will always mourn the fact he never truly got to know me. and that i only found out about his poems and his ideas after he passed.
i hope you're resting easy granddad
#i think he'd be so angry at the world right now. this isnt what he wanted#he also . wasnt a great dad#which really pains me because i only ever knew him as this almost legendary figure. this big and gentle really intelligent man#and my mother deserved a better father. and im angry at him for that#but at the same time i can only see him as this kind and caring and passionate man who taught me about the stars and wore a stupid hat#god. i miss him a lot#also his poems are really good. like genuinely#i dont want to share them bc idk if thats what hed want. but i read them and i feel a lot closer to him
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i see people on here getting angry because of how cod writers can make cod men angry, toxic, mean, etc, and idk how to tell people this but…they’re not real
#like#ive seen several posts where people are like#oh simon would NEVER do that#and price WOULD DIE before he—#like honey#they arent real#this isnt real#what people write is FICTION#and theyre allowed to write people however they want…………..#and to get angry and make all these random posts#this isnt about anyone in particular but randonly on my dash and for you#ive been getting these random hot takes that make no sense to me#they dont exist??????#how would we know????#we literally only get 3-6 games worth of content#which is very limited and doesnt even showcase every character the whole time#like ??????#idk im confused
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Dariax looking for Dorian in the middle of the night.
Dariax perceiving a threat and immediately goes for his weapon, surprising even him.
Dariax finding alma before he finds the tempest.
Dariax sitting down and thinking about all he's lost in such a short amount of time.
Dariax feeling a sense of loss for the first time at the crown keepers disbanding.
Dariax asking himself what he wants to do.
Dariax not having an answer.
#silver sending stones#all this and more in the next fic#but seriously though#ive been thinking about this man for so long#and i feel like i dont really have a grasp on all my emotions about him#because he rolls so many 0s its mathematically impossible#he also saved his friends lives with bless so many times#hes strong and capable.#but also hes dumb as door nails.#and he loves his friends so much#matt said opal saved his life by sending him away.#because hes that loyal.#everyone left him#and youd expect him to be bitter. youd expect him to be angry#but i dont think he is#i think hes sad sure#but i dont think hes going to seek revenge or anything#idk im talking out of my ass and in tired#dariax zaveon#im going to try to make sure this fic isnt like 2000 words long but its a little hard. i got like three whole scenes for it
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#lmao like ...... ok i found something out about a friend recently n im just so Disappointed and angry#i feel like.... used JDJDJDJJFJ#and like.. also manipulated but i also kinda saw it coming. i guess im just nad at myself#bci thought my radar had become pretty good. but u know. maybe i shouldnt always give the benefit of the doubt :)))))#this isnt about the guy i have a crush on btw LMAO. hes actually the one that shed the light so........ shouts out JDJDKDJDKKDDKKDKDM#personal#ive tried to write this post like 6 times NDNDMNDDDDDD#im just disappointed idk. like its not my fault ik but......... hhhh#why do ppl have to be such assholes............
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Having lost my cat, my uncle, my great grandmother, my grandma's best friend (& one of the people who helped raise me), AND my dad all within the span of 9 months,
I have little sympathy for people who use deaths as an excuse to be an asshole. I get it, it sucks. Get the fuck over it. Your grief is not an excuse to treat others like shit. What the fuck.
#speculation nation#this isnt anything personal. im just reacting to a post that kind of pissed me off.#to be fair i was never close with my great grandmother so im not particularly broken up about that one#but it's still yet another death in the family within such a short period of time.#my cat is on this list bc he was the first one and it majorly fucked me up. so yeah it deserves to be here.#the others. well. my grandma's best friend makes me sad but at least she was getting up in years#my uncle and dad though. especially my dad. yea those have fucked me up the most.#im never gonna be the same after experiencing all of this in such short succession.#it sucks in a major way. and things are still continuously tumultuous.#but you dont see me lording it over people and using it as an excuse to be an asshole.#maybe i make people uncomfortable with how casually i mention it. but like whatever. it's simply my truth.#that's still just like. me just talking about what ive been up to. that kind of thing.#idk acting like someone needs to be treated with the most tender of touches after experiencing a major death#to the point where you cant even tell them when theyre being a manipulative little asshole?#i dont fucking think so!#yeah okay all grief hits different but ive pulled myself up by the bootstraps and kept my head on straight#even after i experienced death after death after death after death after Fucking Death#whats your excuse? youre Sad? we all fucking are. thats just life.#it's horrible and awful and it sucks that we have to live with this but you CANT let that affect how you treat other people!!!!!#and here i am making my own post venting about it instead of replying to the aita post that sparked this#bc the person the post was about just made me so angry to hear about.#but i am... a reasonable adult who separates themselves from situations before reacting in anger...#and so im making a tumblr post to get the emotions out instead of getting emotional at random strangers lol#anyways i actually had a pretty good day today. but in the way of grief. the smallest things can trigger moods sometimes.#but i am letting the emotions flow... here they are... i have expressed them... and i shall now release them... amen...#negative/#i guess lol. i sure did rant enough for it.
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when i was 18 my friend died and no one in my family cared. literally everytime id express grief id be told that he wasn't muslim so i shouldn't care or that to die so young he must've been doing something and therefore he must've deserved it and i just accepted that my family isn't that good at handling someones grief. then when i was 19 my older brothers friend died and i was explicitly told by my mum to not say anything to him because he was grieving and i got angry and resentful that the same wasn't extended for me and then id get mad at myself for being so resentful. last week the guy that bullied me in highschool and kickstarted my eating disorder died and ive had to hear everyone talk about what a tragedy it is and i KNOW its awful to be mad at him for how everyone's reacting to his death but im more mad that they were all always capable of this empathy and no one extended it to me when i needed it. but they will now when someone who strangled me unprompted died.
#avd speaks#this is so bad to say and ill probably delete later but im just so fucking angry about this#all of the time#the local newspaper article about my friend has comments of peoppe saying well he must've been doing smth dogdy#and the article about the person who WAS doing something dodgy are comments about how sad it is#and this isnt to say either person deserved to live or die#or that participating in 'bad' things means you deserve to die#im just angry that theyre rewriting history. ill say yeah one time he ____ and get told im talking ill of the dead#but when my friend died my mum went well he overdosed so 🙄 (he didnt and it wouldnt have mattered even if he did)#idk its whatever idec#25th
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anyways. i feel like ive said this before but i think that wouldve been a bigger concern of his when he was younger and was trying to think abt how he was gonna like. live in the world. well and then the world exploded and he decided he could do whatever he wants forever and started larping as his fursona and i think hes chill about it now. like i think hes okay.
#i think at the end of the day he does like his body. especially as he gets older and circumstances change and he feels more like a person#who is alive again i think he really does like himself. and i think part of it is just that he really does do whatever he wants whenever#he wants to do it.#like i think it feels like a bigger deal before everything explodes because like well you have to find a way to navigate the social aspect#of everything you do right. and in my mind i think hes recieved a lot of shit for a lot of things in his life#hence why hes kind of a very angry and isolated person. so i do think when him and fish meet and theyre this very confident person#and a relatively happy person too. and they do it in a way that feels really genuine. so i think that gets his gears turning where hes like#maybe. maybe i could do that and it would fix it. and the social aspect of it basically dissapears because the best person in his life#(in his eyes obv) is also doing that and isnt gonna make it a big deal and a lot of what they like about him is the same stuff he got shit 4#so its like. idk i think maybe theyd talk about it once but i think the hurdle for him is that he doesnt really want to change anything?#not anything changeable at least. i think he likes who he is i dont think hes really particularly insecure in his body or anything#i just think he feels this kind of disconnect from the idea of a person and the idea of himself#i think that something rlly persistent for basically his entire life as mako that he just doesnt. feel like a person. he cant really.#part of why they cling 2 each other is bcs they make each other feel. real and grounded and people. human in a way.#so i think roadhog as an idea helps with that especially again as he gets older and rat becomes a thing and life gets Good again i think#for the first time in his life hes going to really consistently feel like somebody#^ this is why i dont like talking abt hog as a persona and why i liek to call the mask his face. because it is. this is the person he is yk#and i think at some point hes okay being a guy with two names and two faces and sometimes his fish calls him their wife#and he wears cute underwear and its not a big deal and he doesnt even really think about it anymore because it all just feels natural. easy
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I ran out of tag space but oomf had some good notes
smthn easy for today (sorry)
#Kronos is the worst dad no. 1#I remember that fic where he made it obviously that Acronix was unwanted until he found out he's the master of time too 💔#<- prev tags#prepare for a whole rant that doesnt make sense from me#its not really a hc BUT in my brain the time twins are the first and only time in ninjago history that a power has been used by two people#so when krux was born first... kronos just assumed he was the only one to get time. this is coupled with the fact hes a faster learner than#acronix. so he was the first one to actually present the power of time. i think nix finally did YEARSSS later but until then he was seen as#a bit of a failure... my son who is very smart and has this strong power ... and then my other child who never listens to me and is weak#(acronix having adhd and being treated like a bad child because he presented undesirable traits... yeah)#and because of this there was quite a bit of animosity between the twins. even though they loved each other. nix was very very jealous of#krux for soooo many things. krux was treated better and it wasnt like it was *his* fault .. they were KIDS !!! but when youre a child angry#at the world... its harder to express that anger to the adult causing you harm vs someone on more equal ground to you. if that makes sense#'i will not yell and scream at my warrior father but i will refuse to play games with my brother' . obvs this didnt last forever but yknow#neither of the brothers were really able to be who they wanted to be. they couldnt really express themselves properly. but krux was always#able to mask better than acronix. so a bigggg part of that jealousy is also misunderstanding. like krux isnt happy either but when youre a#child its hard to clock how others feel. idk. and then after nix was discoveres to be a master of time .. straight to the grooming to be#child soldiers !!! the culture 60 years ago in ninjago was veryyy different. during the serpentine war i imagine most of the elemental#masters to be 20 ish ? some in their 30s but they had been elemental masters for basically MOST of their lives#esp wu and garm... they grew up and had to fight and never really had that time to be kids. which is how i like to imagine the time twins#theres a lot of parallels between those 4 and i want to gif their fight bc i realized that nix kept looking to krux like 'what do we do'#time twins are very codependent on each other. wu and garm rapidly aged when they were separated. etc#dont think nix couldve lasted those 40 years without his brother. krux takes big brother leading the way to the next level#3 minutes apart !!! but you wouldnt be able to tell that bc they act years apart. well prior to them actually being years apart#the way krux was piloting the iron doom and nix was the co pilot. the plan to go back to the past. nix just going along with stuff#hes more prone to stick to a plan krux makes than krux is to stick to a plan nix makes ... which is kinda canon#like how krux sent the snaks to destroy the borg store (veering off the plan) vs nix who kindaaa needs his brothers leadership or he'll die#in my version of s7 krux gets sent to the time vortex and then acronix is the one waiting years and years. ALSO FUCKKK smthn i realized :#wu isnt really one to hold a grudge like that and so i find it interesting that he WAITED for acronix at the monastery#like for morro and aspheera . they came to wu. vs wu who came to acronix to finish what the twins started all those years ago#thinking about how the time twins were heroes at one point. thinking about how the ninja didnt recognize them in the painting. thinking abt
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i dont want to sleep
#im like a toddler LMAO throwing things around my room bc im so fucking angry and upset#(im throwing a plushie into my bed but still)#i genuinely think i want to breakup like idk this isnt even a joke or looking for reassurance anymore#like maybe im weird for thinking abt a long term relationship and marriage at 18 but ....#we arent ? very compatible ? long term ?#its unfair to him if i keep this going considering hes a bit older than me yk#nvm im writing this out and im crying maybe i DONT want to break up#im tired of overthinking and obsessing over everything . im tired of seeing him as better than me and perfect . i want to be equals#i just want to be normal and to be in a normal relationship where we do normal things#i just want support i want love i want literally ANYONE to tell me that im ok and that im loveable#i hate our stupid time difference and his stupid job i wish i was like this earlier on in the day it is AWFUL being alone#my head hurts and my throat hurts and i hurt#i want to scream and cut and stab someone#i fucking hate her#so much#shes a fucking bitch i wish i could kill her . like genuinely . i want to pull out her teeth lmao if she didnt exist id be happier#GOD i want to stop comparing myself to her and thinking abt them together but ill always be a second experience and its depressing#'youll be my first for anal' yeah great bc thats exactly what i want to fucking hear#not doing much to stop the 'you only want me for sex' thoughts but YEP GREAT THANKS#me : pouring my heart out and trying to say what im thinking !! him : haha yeah sex ! oh also have some inspirational quotes#god just kill me . get me out . i dont want to be here . i dont want to think abt him. i dont want to talk abt him .#i wish we never fucking met ! i wish i never picked up that stupid game#i dont want to lose you though#i hate how attached to him i am . why did you start talking to me again .#shouldve fucking forgotten me while youre fucking your friends and getting high up north island#cant say shit to him though bc itll be the end and ill probably kill myself bc i unfortunately live for him#its over when we meet anyways lol so i got ? 2 months ? 3 months ? of happiness before its gone#i think im gonna do smth bad but i doubt he would care at all . would probably be happy if i die or ghost him .#gives him an excuse to talk to his friends again lol . its so over for me#jamie.txt
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