#no matter what i do or how many hours every day or all the info i look up and read i just am never good enough

[blueberrypancakesworld]

Ice cream for two

Jason x fem!reader

warning : fluff, kinda flirting, mutual feelings, Jaoson is just a sweet shy horny guy, ice cream as an allusion to many things ;)

Summary : What could be better and more delicious than ice cream on a hot summer's day? They wanted to make ice cream for the participants themselves, but with a broken old ice cream maker, nagging teenagers and two leaders who paid more attention to each other than to their tasks, it seemed that a number of things could go wrong.

info : So I'm slowly coming back after my exams, I'm trying to resume my regular upload schedule, request and I hope you continue to enjoy Jason. Thank you for all teh support and have fune readin ;)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

In the summer, there was nothing better than having a cool drink, whether it was a glass of fresh water, a sweet, delicious lemonade or, in any case, a tasty ice cream.

From vanilla to strawberry to chocolate and raspberry, every flavor could be transformed into ice cream and enjoyed in the cool.... this was true for almost everyone in the small town, except for the summer camp, which, under the heat, was just like everyone else.

Because even if the forest and the trees surrounding them provided shade, it was not as cool as a delicious ice cream.

The teenagers and group leaders had sought refuge in the dining hut, where there was the only working fan and at least something like a breeze.

,,Can we get an ice cream here too?” Jason heard the younger boy's whining voice in the main area at the table, and they were trying hard not to move unnecessarily.

One thing the bearded man could understand was that since waking up, they seemed to have been fried under the sun.

Swimming in the lake was cool, but sooner or later they would become fish before they could even do anything.

Turning away from the door, he gave the younger ones an apologetic glance and turned back to his colleague, who had been trying to get the ice machine to work for an hour. ,,No luck?” he asked cautiously, looking at the machine lying on the floor.

Her head had disappeared under the machine with a torch and wrench, and the rest of her body moved from time to time to get at parts of the machine.

,,No, Jason, that thing is at least twenty years old... don't want to destroy your dreams, but if that thing starts up, the ice cream will be radioactive,” she said, coming back out from under the machine.

He helped her up with his hand and resisted the urge to wipe a bit of dust off her body or to touch her again, they were here for ice cream, not for overflowing hormones.

The radioactive ice cream maker in question was from the early days of the fight, back then, it was probably the most modern and newest device, but now, despite being cleaned and tried to be improved, it was more of a scrap heap than anything else.

But they had the ingredients here and the fridge didn't have enough capacity to hold everything. ,,It'll be fine, just give it a try, and if not, well, there's fruit puree and milk” he tried with a smile and went to the bags of fruit and cans of milk, which were tipped into the cool metal tub.

Unable to stop herself from smiling, she watched the blond man as he went about his work like a busy little bee.

No matter how nervous he was, the harder he tried, the less he seemed to see her, her feelings and the love she felt for him. It was almost as if he was blind to her advances...but that could always be changed.

After the machine had started and the ingredients had been cooled and processed into ice cream, it was time to wait a little.

She sent Jason to the storeroom to get the ice cream cones so that they could serve the ice cream better.

He hadn't thought about anything, of course he would get everything for her, would do anything for her, not only because he liked her, they were watchmen for the kids.

How she says my name so sweetly, he thought to himself as he carried the box of waffles into the kitchen and was puzzled to see that the kitchen had become more of an ice bath.

The old ice cream maker seemed to have done its best to form a uniform mass from the ingredients.

This also seemed to have worked for the first minute he was gone, but now the relatively solid mass had turned into a liquid avalanche of sweetness.

A bright, sticky, sweet liquid that should have been vanilla had just spilled all over his crush.

,,Are you okay? Do you need a doctor? Did the machine attack you?” he asked in panic and put the box down to rush to her, almost slipping on the mass that had spread everywhere and she had to support him slightly so that they both didn't go down.

But his panic met her amusement; she seemed to find all of this extremely funny, unlike him, whose mind seemed to be thinking other things again.

When he saw the individual drops running down her, she began to remind him of something else as she licked her lips and sighed.

With her fingers she wiped away the substance and licked it off to roughly get rid of some of the sticky ice.

Such an innocuous situation, his mind kept thinking further, in a direction that made him look away...he had helplessly fallen for her. But was it the same for her? Was she just playing with him? Or was she honest?

,,Attack is a good word for it. As soon as you left, the thing went berserk,” she explained, pointing to the on and off button, which was visibly fused and thus caused the machine to also run out of control.

At least they now knew that they had to get a new machine for next year, because what was left of the kitchen was a pile of scrap metal.

,,Well, we-we could serve smoothies,” he stammered, slowly detaching himself from her as he looked into the tub and saw that it was not quite solid but also not completely liquid.

Her smirk was music to his ears as she walked past him to the sink, where she turned on the tap and splashed cool water onto her face to get rid of the attempted ice.

His bright eyes lay on her, saw exactly how the whitish substance was washed away, how the 'erotic disappeared from the whole at first and then came back when her top was wetter than before.

The outline of her bra, the ice cream, her eyes and the smile on her lips seemed to come from his own dreams, which were often rather suggestive.

Maybe he was dreaming? He was ashamed, ashamed that he felt like a teenager, he was 24 and a grown man... but she was just so beautiful.

The way she treated him, full of kindness and cheerfulness, never nagging him and joining him in his 'group activities' or helping him with repairs, she was just perfect.

Their eyes met, a wink and giggle as she pointed to his hand, wonderingly following her gaze, he saw that he had leaned his hand directly into a sticky puddle.

,,I think after feeding the kids, we both need a shower,” she said invitingly, giving him that sweet look once more before disappearing from the kitchen to tell the teenagers that it smoothies instead of ice cream.

That didn't matter to them, the main thing was to cool down a bit, and the two team leaders also allowed themselves a cooling down as they both disappeared in the direction of the showers...separately, of course.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

@starry-night-life1 , @yearsbecomingcool , @bruhlpng , @wolverrrain , @myromanempire81 , @simonsrealwife , @marsinthespace

[thingswhatareawesome]

just could not get that 12th star in pure fiction. have retried so many times, ended up playing until way fucking longer than i should have. and yet i see people clearing the whole thing with fucking 70s. partly this is what i get for not having prioritized traces on my buffing characters. also this i guess is what i get for not pulling every single uber ranked 5 star even though part of it is getting fucked over by rng (I SEE YOU STANDARD WARP AND GEPARD AND FX). but also i guess this is what i get for rng fucking me over on so many halfassed to lousy relics? i think that's what gets me--is that it's just never enough. never enough 5* never enough pulling the RIGHT ones, never enough traces done never enough truly good relics bc the game won't GIVE me them

and it's not that i'm ftp anymore, i'm doing that little monthly jades subscription and the occasional bp here and there. but it's just never ENOUGH.

[iriswritesforyou]

Mutant Furnace

info - The heating had gone out in the school, Logan decided to help you

Warnings? - Coldness? Reader being from the south?

Word Count: 1,322

Logan had sported his leather jacket since the moment he got it, it was his trademark in a way. He wore it nearly every day and everywhere and you swore he even wore it to bed, even now with the whole heating out  in the school, he didn't really need it, but he wore it. It was the middle of winter and even with Charles and all his money and the heating had gone out. You and the other teachers had rounded up all the blankets and given them to the kids, you had given up everything but one of your own leaving you freezing in bed. It was around midnight now and you had classes in the morning, no matter how much you curled up and tossed around you could feel your fingers and toes go numb. 

Giving up,  you stood up, your teeth chattering and limbs shaking, wrapping your last blanket tightly around you. It was thin and made of a breathable cotton made for decoration, not for keeping warm so it offered little as you slowly made your way out of your room and down into the living room hoping someone had kept the fire going. With every movement your body ached and with every breath you could see it, you haven't grown up with a winter like this, barely ever seeing snow down south. 

It seemed like an eternity as you slowly made your way down the steps of the school, why did there have to be so many? It was quiet as you crept through the house and into the living room with your trembling breathing being the only sound. 

You could have started to cry when you saw the fire had died out and only the embers remained, still you made your way over slowly easing your body on the ground, getting as close to the fire place as you could without being inside of it. You were so focused on getting warm you missed Logan sitting in a chair in the corner of the room wearing that leather jacket. He didn't make a sound as he watched you shaking like a leaf, confused as to why you were awake at this hour and why you weren't curled up under the covers of your bed. You see, Logan had always had a bit of a soft spot for you, everyone knew it too and teased him about it but they never dared to tease you. 

“Kid?” His rough and low voice scared you as you jumped and turned half of your body to look at where his voice came from. 

“Logan?” He noticed how strained your voice was and walked over to you swiftly, crouching down next to you. He immediately noticed how your teeth were chattering and the blue tint to your typically rosy lips, the way your entire body shook worse and worse as the seconds moved by. 

“What are you do- doing down here?” You asked, struggling to make out the proper words “I could ask you the same doll.” 

“ I couldn't sleep, i- it’s too col - cold in here.” 

Logan knew for most people it would have been cold in the school but for him it was only slightly chilly, though you looked like you were freezing, about two seconds away from turning into a popsicle. 

“Why aren’t you in bed then kid? Under the covers where it’s warm?” Your shaking became even worse and your skin became increasingly dull and drained. You shook your head “ I - I gave all o-of my blank - k - ets to the students.” you gave a small laugh lamely and Logan could see your breath in the air “being fr -from the s- s- south and all, I - I don't really do the c- c -cold.” Your eyes flickered down to his leather jacket and how he didn't even look remotely cold “ H- How the hell a - are you n- not freezing?” 

He sat down next to you and shook his head “This is nothing compared to Canada and my mutation allows me to not feel temperatures as much as others.” 

His eyes went to the blanket around you barely managing to trap your body heat “Is that your only blanket?” You nodded. 

You watched as he shrugged off his leather jacket that tonight confirmed he slept in “Here.” He held it out to you and just looked at it dumbfounded, you couldn't really believe that Logan was giving you his jacket. He exhaled deeply and started to reach for your blanket to take it off. “Put it on, it will help, doll.” he said in a gentle tone. 

He helped you as you shook off your blanket and quickly put in his jacket that was too big for you, almost swallowing you whole before wrapping yourself up again. A small selfish part of him loved the way you looked in his jacket, his, on you, something that was too sweet to ever be his. 

It helped a little but not much, still shaking but less so, you thanked him. Logan had hoped that after a few minutes your body would start to warm up but it wasnt looking that way, he could start a fire. 

He unsheathed his claws catching your attention and you watched with unwavering focus as he scraped his claws against the metal on the side of the fireplace making sparks fly, catching the logs. He bent his torso over and blowed into it making a fire appear, you quickly scooted almost on top of it, your body right next to his, shoulder to shoulder. 

He thought you looked truly beautiful in the firelight with it reflecting off your skin and it highlighting the whites of your eyes, like an angel. Several moments passed in silence as he just watched you before you turned towards him, eyes locked onto each other. 

“Thank you” you whispered slowly and he felt your cold breath on his face, he could smell the scent of your hair and body, it was heavenly to him. 

“Well, I can't have one of our best teachers dying of the cold now can I?” you smiled at his words and bent your head down onto his shoulder leaning fully against him, he was so warm and you pushed yourself even closer. 

“You're like a 6 foot heater you know.” The color had now begun to come back to you and you had almost completely stopped shaking but he could still feel how cold you were, even his jacket. 

And in a selfish act that was more for him than for you, he wrapped one arm under your bent knees that were together and the other around your shoulder, picking you up and putting you in his lap. Your body was fully pressed against him now, sitting directly in his lap with his chin resting on his head but you went stiff for a moment before fully relaxing into his touch. 

You both could have spent forever like that, you felt safe in his arms that were tightly wrapped around your waist and he felt like the luckiest mutant in the world. 

With your body temperature finally back to normal a wave of exhaustion crashed into you. Logan kept his eyes fully trained on you as he watched your body fully sag down, eyelids becoming heavy and breathing evening out, he thought you had fallen asleep. Just as we were about to shift so he could lean against the fireplace so he could keep you warm through the night you lifted your neck up to his cheek and pressed your lips against his cheek softly “thank you.”

He froze before taking his hand and running it over your hair “always.” 

That whole night he stayed awake with you in his arms, keeping the fire from dying out and wrapped safely in his jacket in his arms with your blanket covering you both. 

[hiraikotsusama]

ATTENTION! THIS IS A RANT POST ABOUT THOR: RAGNAROK

If you are not interested/a Ragnarok fan please skip, or just don't leave negative comments, thank you.

Ok, here we go.

I personally hate how overrated Thor: Ragnarok is.

People only started criticising Waititi's direction after the Love and Thunder flop, and I was honestly flabbergasted, because... They were criticising the exact same things they loved so much in Ragnarok.

For example, they criticised Thor being too stupid and unserious but... He was already an idiot in Ragnarok? Which, by the way, even as a Loki stan, was the thing I hated the most about the movie (I guess the Odinsons just have a tendency of becoming idiotic scapegoats in every modern piece of media that depicts them. Yes, I'm also referencing the Loki series here.)

But moving on.

Another thing that was funny to me was people (rightfully) criticising the lack of seriousness and conflict with such a great villain. And, once again, I was there standing like... It's the SAME THING that happened in Ragnarok?? Like, the movie that's supposed to be about Ragnarok literally only had like 20 minutes of apocalypse/main conflict with Hela/Surtr in it! Most of the goddamn movie takes place on a dumb garbage planet with the Grandmaster (another wasted character) just fucking around. Little side note here, the Grandmaster is supposed to be the Collector's brother (in the comics and cartoon they both collect rare things and people and compete over it, yadda yadda) and yet this isn't referenced in any way? His powers are never shown. Like what? The potential? Wasted like that? UGH.

Also, this movie adds shallow characters. First of all, obviously, the Grandmaster, who I already covered. Then, and here I'm taking a deep breath waiting to get crucified, Valkyrie.

Ok, I'm going to try and explain this one easily. Valkyrie isn't a bad character, ok? I'm already going to say this since I want to clarify it as soon as possible. I don't think she's bad and I don't dislike her. The problem is, she is given a shallow personality and shallow purpose, at least when I look at her. For instance, I appreciated the way her trauma was portrayed, with her drinking and all, but they do joke about it sometimes (too many) and that I do not appreciate. But then. Her personality just... Ends there. And again, this is comprehensible in a way, but what I do not understand is her just switching sides randomly, like she didn't capture and shock Thor just hours before in the movie. That, plus her serving little purpose to the plot is what irks me the most. Like, the main things she does in the movie are:

1. Capturing Thor and bringing him to the GM.

2. Telling them about the only way out of the planet.

3. Being there in the final battle.

And if this was a better written movie, this would make her a necessary character. But in Ragnarok... She isn't.

She catches Thor, then dips. Ok, just have him randomly land in the GM's throne room, or have him getting caught by another rando who then dips.

The escape? Loki has lived with the GM (and his most trusted court members/whatever they are supposed to be) for two weeks. Do you really think that someone like him couldn't gather such a massive piece of info in this time? Or even better, do you think he hasn't noticed the GIANT EINSTEIN-ROSEN BRIDGE IN THE MIDDLE OF THE SKY? He is intelligent. That's the point of his character. He would- SHOULD- have figured it out in a matter of days, the only thing stopping him was getting to a decent ship to cross said bridge, and that's what he actually needed his brother (and maybe Hulk, even if his presence was pretty random) for.

The final battle was disappointing, so I'm not even going to comment this one.

All of this to say that, with the way the character/movie was written, Valkyrie could have been removed, a few changes could have been made and the movie would have been the same. Yeah, she's friends with Hulk, which, cool, but once again this bond isn't used in any way besides her joking with him and Bruce. Her character was treated way better in the What If episodes she appeared in.

[Edit: someone reblogged and thought I was implying that her character should be thrown away. To be clear, I wasn't, I actually like her and do acknowledge that Jane, too, was shallow as a character, I just didn't mention her because she doesn't appear in this movie. All I was saying is that the writing makes her just be there, which is something that pisses me off, too. This was just to point out that Ragnarok just added so many characters with potential that was never used, and Valkyrie is one of them. Hell, you could take away half of the secondary characters, if not (almost) all of them, and the movie would stay the same.]

Then we have Korg. Yeah, I got nothing to say, he's an idiot that used to be a serious/half-important character in comics/series and got severely distorted in this movie like most other characters starring in it. Funnily enough, just like Valkyrie, his character is treated better and is way more useful in What If, which is honestly ironic.

Then, I could talk about the mistreatment of both Thor and Loki's characters but that would take a post the length of the Divine Comedy, so I'll just cut it short and cover the most important points.

Thor and Loki are obviously not appreciated (Loki is disliked more, of course he is), and therefore are written in a very OOC way. Thor turns into a full blabbering idiot and Loki is interpreted as someone whose only purpose is to betray, stab and rule. And that's all I'm going to say for now, even though I might extend the discourse in a future post.

And now, oooh boy, Hela. I loved Hela, I was excited as soon as she appeared on screen. And what happened next? Her brothers got lost in space and we didn't see them interact with her in any way besides her introduction and the short ahh dialogue with Thor in the final battle. I hate this so much. Once again, the movie that's supposed to talk about Ragnarok only shows the conflict in the last 20 minutes of the movie. And we barely see Hela, or at least we don't get to see her as much as we should, given that she's supposed to be the main antagonist of the damn movie. Her character was great, for all that we could see, but she is a walking definition of wasted potential and I despise it.

Now, there is something I do appreciate about the movie, and it's the characterization of Hulk. He finally isn't reduced to a stupid destroyer or dumb beast, and as a huge Hulk fan and Agents of S.M.A.S.H. watcher I liked this. This, and Heimdall being given some scenes and characterization, too. That's it. That's what I liked about the movie.

Now, short list of things I hated to finish the post: Fandral and Volstagg being killed like flies, Hogun meeting a similar fate right after, Sif not even appearing (so much for Sif and the Three Warriors); the constant jokes that were obviously made for an audience of four years olds; Skurge (or whatever his name was) just... Being there? Another useless/misused/mischaracterised character I didn't mention before, because DAMN is this character STUPID; STRANGE just appearing at some point and dipping (like he couldn't help them?? WHY EVEN MAKE HIM SHOW UP AT ALL UGHHH).

I think that's about it for now, thanks for reading this stupid rant. I'm open for constructive criticism and comments, and also for peaceful discussion, so DM me or leave a comment if you feel like interacting.

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

Aita for not making any of my characters, that I have to crank out daily, pansexual/polysexual/omnisexual specifically and only making them bi?

🏳️‍🌈👶🏼 so i can recognize this later lmao also I'm not panphobic or anything, this isn't about the validity of the label, pan is fine.

So i (20snb bi) have a project I'm working on where I take all the characters from a specifc media I'm into and pair them up with each other to make every possible ship kid from every possible ship(excluding characters who are kids themselves or are related or something, that shit is gross). Basically taking every character and pairing them up with another and creating a kid I think they'd have. Its a big project with lots of characters and I'm easily over 400 at this point. I really enjoy this, even if I'm not even 25% complete.

However I set a schedule for myself that at least one ship kid needs to come out each day which, considering I draw them, color them and give them some development and some even have siblings, (The refs themselves easily take me an hour to an hour and a half) I have to make lots of them quickly to keep up with my daily grind. I've been doing this project for over a year and although it's stressful, I can get them out quickly with breaks for myself.

Their character sheets all have some pretty basic info like their name, gender, pronouns, personality and more but it also includes their sexuality/orientation. I have a pretty basic list of options for what their sexuality will be: straight, lesbian, gay, Enbian, bi, Aro, ace and aroace with a few random things like polyam, WLW and a good amount of the something-loving-something/juvelic terms. I did this because, well, there's not many entirely unique orientations outside of them and although I love mogai/xenogenders and complex identities, I dont want to potentially drag up discourse or bring problems to my budding art blog over it. Its just not worth it to me to turn something I really care about on its head, even if I like microlabels.

In this case, I'm using bi as an umbrella term as most of the other terms share the same definition with slight variations in wording or action but not much difference in practice. We all like everyone, it's basic stuff. However, apparently this is a problem.

I've gotten one or two anons asking me questions about my guides asking some kind stuff like is this lesbian ship kid a butch or femme or Is this picture of them now or just at the age you put on the ref and other harmless stuff. Then things got rude with some Nbphobia but thrice now I've gotten asks:

1. Asking snarkily if im a panphobe

2. insulting me for not specifically writing pan or Omni and just writing bi.

3. Saying that I "clearly dont care about pansexual representation." Then brought up how my primary oc is native american so i clearly care about representation but that oc used to be a sona and I'm native?? Its confusing. (And Lowkey racist shit to just assume any native character is a "diversity quota" character instead of just a person existing but I digress-)

Im not pan, im bi so ig these people assume I'm not cool with pan people which isnt true? I have nothing aginest them, they are just pretty similar and I dont feel like it matters if they are specfically bi or pan or poly or any other label. I don't go into details like that for any other sub-group, not even pronouns and I included combinations and some common Neopronouns. I understand the importance of representation but my project has less than 50 people looking at it every day, Im not netflix or something. I'm one guy on the most LGBT blogging site with a big project and very little audience, I'm not showing people who wouldn't already know what pan is that pansexuality exists.

This project isn't that deep considering the characters in question aren't human/dont have human characteristics.(no it's not hazbin/helluva) Also ive never spoken about lgbt discourse or stated anything remotely close to it beyond the guides just passively having characters who are an LGBT identity. I've not even mentioned all the potentional orientations they could have so I'm not sure where/why this came up in the first place. The most politcial things ive said are calling out a creator in my fandom who outed themselves as a transphobe and mentioning im pro-palestine. That's it.

I mean this is pretty low stakes, I can just block these people and be done with it and this some seriously online shit but I just wanna check.

Am I being an asshole for just writing bi instead of specifying their mspec label because I have to produce characters quickly and I don't see enough of a difference to warrant a change/specification that would ultimately slow and clog an already stressful and complex project?

I dont think I am but idk lol

What are these acronyms?

[werewolfsmile]

re: "All I’m saying is the fact that someone isn’t talking to me about Eliot Spencer every second of every day is very unfair and borderline illegal." & tags - if you want to, can you elaborate on your werewolf!eliot ideas?? i’d like to hear about it!! if not all good tho :)

Oh boy oh boy oh boy! Yes I would love to elaborate! (buckle up because i have Thoughts)

(wow this really got away from me so uhhh .... warning for 2k of ranting about Eliot as a werewolf?? list of headcanons under the cut)

From the moment I first met Eliot Spencer, I knew he was werewolf-coded. Aside from his insanely fantastic fighting abilities and the absurd amount of punishment he can take, there are many other factors that contribute to his werewolf status.

Eliot needs a pack Our boy is out here working on his own for years and look at all the good it did him! None! He carries severe trauma from his family life because he blames himself for how it all went down and doesn't think he'll be welcomed back. Plus something probably happened during his military days or early PMC days to put him off working with others. Could have been the pain of losing people all the time, could have been something more. Either way, Eliot working on his own is a defence mechanism - but a self-destructive one.

Wolves thrive in packs - like duh, they're pack animals. As my username suggests, I'm into werewolves and, by extension, wolves. I've done research for my own werewolf novels in the past, so I know that in an average wolf pack, each pack member will have physical contact with the other pack members on the regular. Like, several times an hour! (gosh if I can find the research paper this info came from I'll link it but honestly it's been years) That's a serious level of physical contact required to keep the emotional bonds of the pack healthy!

Flick back to Eliot. He loves to fight, he loves the violence and the pain, yes. He hates the killing and the blood on his hands. He actually tries to leave the assassin world behind after he meets Toby (which is before he meets Moreau, as per early dialogue in The French Connection Job). He bonds quickly with Toby. Show Eliot a little love and care and he's yours for life! He moves onto retrieval work, then somehow ends up working for Moreau.

Now, when we see Eliot and Moreau in The Big Bang Job, Moreau says, "You work alone." Which means that Eliot had that reputation when he came to Moreau. He probably only took contracts to start off with. But he accepted job after job from Moreau and was so good that he was highly respect and it's inferred he ended up as Moreau's top bodyguard/assassin. Why the hell would Eliot end up that close to a man who brings out all the worst in him? Because Eliot's a werewolf and no matter how toxic, Moreau fulfills the need for a pack bond that he's been missing all this time.

Fast forward to Eliot meeting the rest of the Leverage team. One job only - my ass. He saves Hardison's life after Hardison brought a gun to their little meeting - and we all know how Eliot feels about guns.

Wolves are designed to live and operate in packs. Eliot says it's one job only but is bonding with them all from the get-go. Werewolf trait confirmed.

Eliot needs physical touch Now, I know what you're thinking. Eliot canonically avoids physical contact with the team. He refuses hugs, especially from Hardison, growls at Parker poking his bruises (don't get me started on the growls), and shoves people (ahem Parker) out of his personal space. So why would he do all this if he needs physical touch??

Because he's one gigantic ball of angst and self-loathing and guilt.

Eliot doesn't think he deserves forgiveness or love or family, etc. That is a whole other rant, but he denies himself the physical contact he needs with others as a way of punishing himself.

However, as the series progresses, we see him become more comfortable with physical contact! He hugs Hardison several times, he doesn't move away from Parker, etc. Why? Because he's bonded with this team (ahem pack) and there's only so much he can suppress his instincts. The more time he spends with them, the more naturally the contact flows.

Eliot needs to protect others Whenever we get a scene of the team walking as a group, where is Eliot positioned 90% of the time?? That's right, at the back of the group. He lets the others walk in pairs and falls back to bring up the rear. He's keeping them all in his line of sight and constantly scanning for threats ahead, along with protecting the team from any rear attacks. It makes sense for him to do this given his military background, but it also makes sense for a werewolf to do this.

He's the only werewolf in the team. His instincts revolve around keeping the pack safe and protected, so he does that in the best way he knows how.

Not to mention how feral gets over kids!!

Wolf life is all about the pack and the family structure. Pups are integral to the pack's survival and future. Eliot doesn't have kids of his own. But that doesn't stop his instincts from blaring every time he interacts with a kid, be it on the con or off. He takes time out every time to help that kid in an attempt to calm the raging storm of instincts inside his body.

Eliot needs to feed others It's another werewolf instinct that rears its head when they're in the safety of their headquarters (ahem den). Protecting the team/pack from physical threats is just one aspect of taking care of them. Feeding them is the other major one.

None of these idiots can cook to save their lives - except Nate, but he's also drowning his liver 90% of the time, so Eliot has to compensate for that, too. The team can't operate at full capacity if they're not consuming good nutrition. So Eliot makes sure to feed them.

His humanity recognises that these are independent people - coworkers - and he can't control every meal of every day. But he can cook for them, once a week or once a job, which is just enough to satisfy his instincts that he's doing his part to care for them. Plus they love his cooking, and the praise he gets from it is an unexpected but pleasant bonus.

Eliot and team sports/kitchens This ties in with my first point about Eliot needing a pack, but all the times we see Eliot go super hard and get absorbed in the role he's playing are when he's on a team sport or he's in the kitchen. Both of these fulfill super important instincts for him - being in a team/pack and providing food for others.

Think about The Tap-Out Job. Eliot's playing a fighter but he's not pretending to be on a team. He doesn't get over-invested in the role. But what about when he's a baseball player? A hockey player? He falls into those roles hard because he's working with another team again, and this little werewolf is built for that environment. Same in The French Connection: the kitchen becomes his den, the students are his pack mates, and he goes hard at investing in them and protecting them. Never mind the personal aspect of Toby.

Same for episodes like The Fairy Godparents Job when we get a scene of Eliot teaching a bunch of girls self-defence. Team setting + protecting kids = happy werewolf instincts.

So, werewolf headcanons? I have a lot of different origin theories but the main one I like for Eliot is:

he became a werewolf either for a covert military op, or was bitten by Moreau (choose your own angst flavour)

if it was for the military, they were trying to engineer supersoldiers and he was deemed a failure; he has werewolf instincts all the time but only has enhanced strength, healing, etc on full moons

if it was bitten by Moreau, there's a psychic-style bond linking them, which is why he was so loyal to Moreau for so long, and also why he is so reluctant to go after Moreau

(wow this is too different theories already and i said this was my 'main one' whoops)

Eliot can only shift easily on the full moon; shifting outside of a full moon can only be caused by extreme stress and is ridiculously painful

he suffers an insanely high prey drive all the time and is so strict about his control because he doesn't actually wanna rip out the throat of Random Guard #3

he used to chain himself up for full moons so he didn't hurt anyone, but since the team found out about him, Hardison and Parker have taken it upon themselves to 'puppy-sit' him every full moon

this involves no chains but an obscene amount of dog chew toys. Eliot is never impressed. He also never chases or chews the toys. The video evidence Hardison has was obviously doctored.

Hardison and Parker found out the truth when a con went sideways and Eliot was trapped in a room with them during the full moon

he was terrified he was going to kill them - or worse, bite them - but his instincts recognised them as pack so instead he just tried to wrestle with them all night

Hardison had a major freak out when he discovered Eliot was a werewolf - it's one thing to be obsessed with sci-fi/fantasy, it's another thing entirely to see your best friend transform before your eyes

Parker was not even remotely phased, being all like, "pfft of course werewolves are real, I thought you knew that Hardison, you talk about your elves and orcs all the time!"

"Woman that is completely different and you know it!"

"What else do you think is fake? The tooth fairy?? Ha!"

Eliot is Done With Their Shenanigans

Parker only ever refers to Eliot as Sparky when he's in his wolf form

Sophie didn't actually know about werewolves before the reveal but she pretends that she did

Nate knew about werewolves before Eliot, he just chooses to pretend that they're Not A Thing

werewolves generally don't make good hitters, because the constant exposure to violence ramps up their hunting instincts aka they find it hard not to kill

of course, this doesn't matter if you're someone like Moreau who specifically wants killing machines and thus turns his top hitters into werewolves, to ensure loyalty and enhance his strength

the only other werewolf hitter not under Moreau's control that Eliot knows is Quinn, who most certainly did not pull his werewolf strength punches when they tousled in The First David Job

Quinn doesn't have a pack (werewolf or otherwise) and genuinely doesn't seem phased by this, which pisses off Eliot to no end

however, after they work together in The Last Dam Job, Quinn deems himself Eliot's Best Werewolf Bud and keeps popping up randomly to hang out on full moons, etc

Parker and Hardison are a bit weirded out (and a little jealous) of Quinn's attention initially, but soon get over that when they discover that two werewolves on a full moon absolutely play for hours like 6 month old puppies - especially with the tug rope

Eliot is Extremely Susceptible to belly rubs even in his human form, which is half the reason he pushes people out of his personal space a lot - his reputation would never survive anyone finding out

of course the entire team figures it out and take to ambushing him with belly rubs whenever he's being stubborn or annoying

belly rubs are also the only way he will relax enough when he's injured so they can treat his wounds

despite the incessant dog jokes, the ever-growing pile of dog toys, and the bowls labelled with "Sparky" and cartoon bone symbols ... Eliot absolutely adores the pack he's found himself in and wouldn't change them for the world

One of these days I will sit down and write a thousand fics for werewolf!Eliot! Till then, I'll just keep churning out the headcanons ;)

[dangerousartisanwerewolf]

To all the Americans on tumblr rn...

I am not American, nor am I old enough to vote yet as I missed being the legal voting age for my province by only about a week- curse my extremely late birthday.

(which weirdly enough has also had such an incredibly tight election that they are still counting the votes right now even though it happened 2 weeks ago because the two parties are basically tied. }

but I am also very worried for you guys way down south. Hopefully America will put the right person into power this time and everything ends up being ok for you all. Not to be too cliché but I am sending thoughts and prayers and I hope you guys all stay safe down there. I honestly can't even imagine how you guys fell- I don't even live there and I've been feeling increasingly nauseous as the hours go by and I have had to offline for the most of the day.

Remember:

To take care of yourselves. Just in general, in whatever way you see fit

You absolutely do not have to live stream the election polling/results thing on TV, doom scroll election content the whole day long, watch the news, or consume any other election related content. As horrible as it feels to say this; the results will be the same regardless of whether or not you are watching it. Sometimes it is just better for you and your mental health to just log off of sm/screens for the night

If it all does feel like its getting too much for you, please log off/take a sm/screentime break

Most importantly, if you haven't already, please vote!!!! I am not American and am barley old enough to be considered a legal voter (Missed my own countries election *tears*) so I can't really help in terms of providing resources but I am sure there are all sorts that can help you I'm sure. I know that its getting late at night; some polls have closed already but not as many as you would think. I found out that most are actually open way later than I thought. As it turns out, some are even open til 1! You learn something new every day I guess!

Just Please, Please, Please go out and cast your ballot and make your voice known, with how close this is quite literally every voice matters!!! GO VOTE!!!

Poll closing times in case you need it (I only included ones that close 8pm and upwards because it is 7:30 at the time of writing this)

8 p.m. ET

Alabama

Connecticut

Delaware

District of Columbia

Florida (Polls in Eastern time zone close at 7 p.m. ET; part of Panhandle are in Central time zone)

Illinois

Maine

Maryland

Massachusetts

Mississippi

Missouri

New Hampshire (Polling hours vary by municipality and are listed by location here)

New Jersey

Oklahoma

Pennsylvania

Rhode Island

Tennessee

8:30 p.m. ET

Arkansas

9 p.m. ET

Arizona

Colorado

Iowa

Kansas (Polling locations close at 8 p.m. ET in all except four counties in the west)

Louisiana

Michigan (Polling locations close at 8 p.m. ET in all except four counties)

Minnesota

Nebraska

New Mexico

New York

North Dakota (Polls close at 8 p.m. ET in all but eight counties)

South Dakota (Polls close at 8 p.m. ET in the east)

Texas (Polls close at 8 p.m. ET for most of the state except three counties in the west)

Wisconsin

Wyoming

10 p.m. ET

Montana

Nevada (The polling location at City Hall in West Wendover closes at 9 p.m. ET)

Utah

11 p.m. ET

California

Idaho (Polling locations in the south close at 10 p.m. ET)

Oregon (Polling locations in Malheur County close at 10 p.m. ET)

Washington

12 a.m. ET

Hawaii

1 a.m. ET

Alaska (Polling locations close at 12 a.m. with the exception of Adak)

I'm not really sure what other useful info I could put as I don't know much about America or it's electoral system but I hope that helps.

A lot of people I have seen have been posting about how they feel sick to their stomach's and that they can't get off the news and how they just feel terrible so...

Things you can do to distract yourself for the rest of the night (And possibly the next few days, idk how long it takes to count votes)

Have an early bedtime/take a late nap (Only go to bed after 9 at least though, otherwise you'll mess up your sleep schedule and make you feel worse.) Just sleep your way througb it if you cant help it.

To add on to point one I often use asmr if I can't fall asleep right away/to distract myself. My favorites are: Jaden Aliana Asmr, Oceans Asmr, Kaitlynn Reha asmr, and my absolute favorite Goodnight Moon ASMR (Check out her babble brook, 1920's, or valley girl series')

Listen to a podcast (I like Rotten Mango- informative true crime, Buzzfeed unsolved- funny true crime/ghost hunting, Look behind you- also true crime, and Chris Chan; a comprehensive history)

Never too late for some cleaning! Clean your house, bathroom, bedroom, closet, do a deep clean.

If your a student like me- do your schoolwork! I know you have some studying or homework that needs to be done! Get on it!! I use the pomodoro method if that does anything

Have a self care night- do an everything shower or fancy bath, make facemasks, mani pedi's ect.

Watch a movie or marathon t.v shows you love/that are comfort shows (Some of my comfort shows are; Bobs burgers, Gravity falls, the moomins 1990, the office, what we do in the shadows, black books, derry girls, moone boy, and all creatures great and small and M.A.S.H. Some of my comfort movies are; Little women, the cornetto trilogy, Emma, Legally blonde, Pride and Prejudice)

Never too late for some cooking! One of my favorite hobbies is cooking and baking (Mostly baking) Make some chocolate chip and snickerdoodle cookies, muffins, cupcakes or try a fun cake.

Go for a night walk! Just make sure you bring a buddy and some flashlights of you're in total darkness like I am right now. (Love me a Canadian fall! Already snow where I am so of course that means everyone now needs to immediately put up Christmas decorations lol. At least the lights are nice at night)

Spend time with loved ones. Call or text a friend, spend time with your family, roommates, whoever. If your on campus at a uni see if there's literally any activities or clubs open at this hour you can go to

Read. I know you have a tbr you keep meaning to get to

Go on a research rabbit hole about something interesting. Try to learn something new. Some topics to get you started relating to where I live cause why not; Try to learn about : The Animals of Canada, Indigenous cultures and peoples of Canada- ex: try to learn some Cree or Halqemeylem phrases, try to memorize all of our provinces and territories.

Get through any chores you still have to do

Make/do something creative: Play an instrument, record a song, make a collage, paint, draw

Play some music, listen to your favorite songs on loop (Spotify's still collecting data for wrapped!)

Download a videogame on your phone- just one to pass the time even if its total addictive trash. Some ones I like: Moomin town- Idle, relaxing, town building, slowpaced, free, Miriam webster quizitative- free, wordgames, has an end to it, Toca boca hair salon- not free, hair salon game, endless, Toca boca town- not free but there are dupes, dollhouse game, bird bnb- townbuilding, slowpaced, as well theres all sorts of cute isle cat games; I like the grocery store and cafe ones

Make sure to:

Drink water

Eat at regular intervals

take breaks from screens (It'll hurt ya eyes)

get some sleep at some point

Don't sleep all day (Try to get up at a normal time)

if you feel like you need- put screen time limits on your phone. Or as well, turn down the brightness if you feel you have to doom scroll.

That's all for now. Hope you guys are doing ok and that the results are what we are all hoping for. Just know that you are in pretty much everyone's minds and we are all thinking of you (Even if we don't live in America). Stay safe and take care of yourself and your mental health.

Love, thoughts, prayers, and support from Canada/Tumblr and have a good night.

Congrats if you managed to get through this absolute brick of text. I commend you. I'll probably check back in tomorrow.

[rainstops]

fading remembrence

4nemo x reader

TW: reader dies (the cause of the death is a little detailed in ventis part), hinting at suicide in kazuhas part

info: for scaramouche, both wanderer and scaramouche is used

summary: you die right in front of the anemo boys, and they cannot seem to accept your death, because with your death it also felt like they lost their own life. you were their light.

a/n: wrote this in the middle of the night, while putting down my switch for two hours. also i will start to write for zelda totk/botw soon!!

whenever xiao ordered almond tofu at any restaurant, it always tasted the same. even when he cooked it himself. it always had the same taste. the tofu being as bland as tofu usually is, and the dish tasting sweet and like almonds. just what you would expect almond tofu to be. nothing more and nothing less.

but when you appeared in his life, xiao found out you liked cooking. and when you found out that almond tofu was his favorite dish, you immediately went out of your way to learn how to make almond tofu. knowing that xiao ate it a lot, you asked him if he could taste it. xiao did what you asked him to. but what he didnt expect was that the almond tofu tasted different. not in a bad way, but whenever you cooked it, it tasted like you had put your emotions onto a plate. like a little piece of joy, you served xiao. it was the first time, xiao could for sure say that he enjoyed something. but the word 'enjoy' did not feel like it was enough to describe the way he felt. he loved the dish, he loved how skilled you were at cooking it, but most of all, he loved you. and you loved him too. you loved him as long as you could. you loved him, before the passing of time took your life. xiao loved you a lot longer than just that. he loved everything about you. he loved the way you would smile at him, because you gave him a different smile you gave your friends, your family or strangers. when his immortality kept him right where he was, he realized how frozen in time he felt. for you everything moved on so quickly, and soon it was over. xiaos days remained the same old and blank routine before you showed up, and it returned to being the same when you left. but after your death, everything seemed to be so heavy. his eyelids, his arms, his legs, his head, but especially his heart. he searched all across teyvat, for a person, a restaurant or anyone, who could cook almond tofu the exacty way you did. he wanted to taste it again, even if it was just once more. he despaired when he couldnt find a way to make his favorite dish taste the way you made it taste, but his whole world crumbled only then, when he realized he couldnt remember how it tasted. he stopped counting the days and the nights he spend living, because why would it matter if he was slowly forgetting you?

he used to do it, so he could remember your birthday, or your anniversary, or any day that was special to you. but now you were gone, and xiaos memories were leaving as well.

☂

venti wrote many songs in his life. many of them telling stories, but just as many of them just there to sound pretty. but then when you showed up, he had someone to write songs for. he wrote them about you, and for you. and you sang the songs together. venti loved your voice. your voice was the best part of his songs. to him, it sounded like an angels voice.

not only your singing voice, but your voice in general. it made his heart beat so fast, it nearly sprang out of his chest. whenever you greeted him with a smile on your face, it was like all his worries and problems disappeared into thin air.

maybe he took it for granted. maybe he expected to be able to wake up everyday and sing in the kitchen with you while preparing breakfast together. maybe he just thought you could sing him to sleep every night.

well it so happened that that was not the case.

a member of the fatui took your life, and your angelic voice right with it. venti was there. venti was there, when the knife of the fatui found your back. the next moments were a mere blur to venti. he remembers getting rid of the fatui, and in the following moments, he held you in his arms, pleading to be able to hear your voice again.

he mumbled something along the lines of healing you, but you told him that it was too late. it was you who spoke those words, with the voice he loved so much. you lifted a hand to his cheek, and said the three words he loved hearing from you so much. a tear left his eye and fell right under your eye, on your cheek, making it look like it was a tear of your own. he held you in his arms tightly, like it could prevent you from leaving the world.

that was when you spoke your last words. 'thank you' they were. thank you? what were you thanking him for?

your eyes closed, and the smile you had on your face the last moments before your death left. your hand slowly sank from his face, and he held your hand. your hands were usually cold, but this time it bothered him. this time it felt like it was only pointing towards your death.

☂

the wanderer never held much appreciation for the people around him. that was until you came around. it was like you could see right through him, and his facade. like you could see the way he crumbled on the inside, not knowing how to handle his own emotions.

he loved the way you held his hand. your warm hand felt very relaxing against his usual cold one. often you would play with them as well. whenever he was having an especially hard day, because some people kept annoying him, you'd sit down with him. his head in your lap while you were massaging one of his hands. you'd listen carefully as he talks about the people that would annoy him throughout the day. at the end, you would give him a kiss on the forehead. although often enough he'd already been asleep by then.

but you seemed to know him better than he knew himself. you knew what he needed and when he needed it. whenever he was about to explode from anger, you hugged him, since you seem to very well know, that all the anger is build up from all the things that happened to him.

a tear fell as you held scaramouche close to you. one hand around his body, and the other on the back of his head, as his head was resting on your shoulder. the tears were wetting your shoulder but you didnt mind. you would do anything to make scaramouche happy again.

another tear fell, another one, and another one. but this time it was the day you died.

with widened eyes you dropped to the floor on your knees, scaramouche caught you before you could drop to the floor. a singular tear fell from your eye as well.

scaramouche held your body tightly against his, as if you would disappear if he would let go. in this scenario, this was the case, but no matter how close he'd hold you, there was nothing he could do.

he held you the way you did it, everytime he was upset. with an arm around your body, and a hand on the back of your head, while your head was laying against his shoulder.

'i cant breathe scaramouche. im scared'

were the last words you spoke, before your eyes slowly closed.

scaramouche had never cried that much in his life. not when he was betrayed so often, not when his mother threw him out like he was nothing, and not whenever you would comfort him.

scaramouches chest filled with regret. he wishes he would have been there for you at least as much as he was there for you. he wishes he bought you more presents for even just putting up with him. he wishes he wouldve just gotten over his ego and thanked you. he would do all those things and so much more, just so he could repay you.

☂

you remember the day so cleary, when kazuha confessed his love to you. his usually so casual demeanor was all gone, as his hands were shaking while holding a piece of paper. his face was bright red and his voice was shaking and cracking up, as he recited his self written poem for you. when he was done he wished for the earth to open up and swallow him whole.

when you started giggling he thought you were laughing at him. he didnt dare to look up at you, his gaze was only burning holes into the floor.

but when he really tensed up was when you jumped at him and threw your arms over his shoulders.

ever since then, kazuha had written so many poems for you, and you had stored them all very carefully. one after another.

one time for his birthday, you tried writing him one, and although it wasnt the best, he treasured it like nothing else.

but also he treasured you.

for your one year anniversary you gifted him an old gramophone. you werent sure if he was really going to like it, but he adored it.

ever since that day, most evenings were spend dancing to music, time passing so much faster than it seemed. your hands were locked and one of kazuhas hands was resting on your waist. one of his hands went through your hair.

on the first day you danced with him, he realized how much he needed you. you were his light, his hope, his everything. its why he calls you 'his star'

unfortunately, every star dies one day.

if you would ask him, his star died way to early.

on the night your light faded, a shooting star crossed the sky. kazuha knows youre only supposed to make one wish, but all of them crossed his mind at once. he wished he could dance with you again, he wish his fingers could make his way through your soft hair once more, he wished he could gift you more poems he wrote, and watch your eyes light up like the night sky does when the stars start glowing.

his breath hitched when he felt your hand touch his cheek once more. you gave him a last smile, and a tear rolled down your cheek. your hand fell from his cheek, but kazuha caught it mid air, and he held it to his chest.

later, a poem could be found on your grave.

in a moment of sorrow, please let me borrow, your healing light once more, before i am found at our seashore.

it was the last poem he ever wrote.

[inactiveobeymeblog]

can u do how the om brothers would react to a mc that is like. (for lack of better words) EXTREMELY dumb ..... like karen smith level slow💀

Lmao I LOVE this idea. The best part is that I can definitely relate to this lol.

Content Rating: SFW

Content Warning: None, GN!MC

Characters: ✨The Seven Brothers✨

Additional Info: MC is very slow to understand, the brothers are patient, shorter HC’s this time (sorry), we love dumbfounded MC, the brothers love MC

Lucifer

He finds it quite surprising, actually

That the fact that there is such a human who is so oblivious to so many things

He first noticed when you walked into his office and he was on a phone call, but you didn’t see he was and you just continued to talk

He had to tell you to hush

He also told you to be more aware of other people’s situations

But he loves that about you

He even finds it endearing

Mammon

You’re in the same boat as him

You both take so long to understand a joke and you often find yourself looking at each other with confused expressions

It will take you both at least a day or two to understand what something meant or recognize what was happening at a given moment

Sometimes if one of you find something out before the other, one of you will rush to tell the other

It’s a cycle you two repeat endlessly and it’s hilarious

He’s just happy he finally found someone who can relate to him

Leviathan

If you’re slow to figure something out, whether it be a “why does this character to this and that” or a “what do you mean by that”, prepare to have a very long rundown conversation

Levi LOVES to explain everything to you in very large detail

He also loves the fact that you will volunteer to understand everything about a show he gets absorbed in

That means pulling an all nighter to go through every single manga volume or watch every episode of an anime

And if you ever need to know anything, he’s got your back

He fawns over you and the fact that he gets to talk to such a human like you and express his love for things to you without hearing you complain

He’s head over heals for you

Satan

Usually, if you ever find yourself struggling to understand something in a book or something you’re studying, he’ll explain it to you in the most simple way possible

Or if you need a more detailed and longer explanation, he’s happy to give you one

He’s an excellent source if you ever need help with your R.A.D school work

He’s also a walking dictionary

So if you don’t know what a word means, just ask him

He gets an ego boost every time you go to him and not one of his brothers

He loves the trust you put in him

Asmodeus

He usually gets stumped on how to explain things you don’t understand that isn’t of the sexual, joking manner

But he’ll try extra hard just for you

Like if you don’t understand how makeup works, he’ll more so demonstrate than tell you

It’s easier for him

And if you’re more of a visual and hands-on learner, then you’re in luck!

Because he won’t give up until you’ve mastered whatever art you ask for help in, even if it’s a skill he isn’t an expert in

He just loves how he can be in your company for hours and not get tired of you

Beelzebub

It doesn’t matter if you’re well conversed in food culture or not, he will explain everything about a certain food item to you down to the very soil the ingredients were planted in

He would talk for hours just describing the taste of food or furniture

Make sure to get him a snack to munch on while you get him to talk about food or he might just start nibbling on your arm instead

He loves the way he can talk to you about his favourite snacks and meals without making you bored or tired of his nonsense rambling

Belphegor

Ask him where the best napping spots are and he’ll make a five page full analysis on where he thinks the best spots are

He’ll explain why if you ever ask

He will even invite you to his favourite; the attic

Then he’ll continue to explain there

He’ll also act as if it’s the best thing that’s ever happened in his life

I mean, he gets to talk to someone who actually wants to know about his favourite napping places?

Count him IN

He loves the way you will earnestly listen to him and he also loves the fact that you will fall asleep with him when he asks

A/N: I hope I answered your ask correctly! I hope everything made sense bc I didn’t go back and proofread anything. Thanks for reading! Thanks for requesting, anon! 💜

[wafflerageface]

Top 5: Favorite Durgetash headcanons

Like my personal headcanons or ones I’ve seen?

Personal headcanons:

1. Durgetash were head over heels in love with each other, even if they expressed love in ways that seemed fucked up to everyone else. They were two incredibly lonely people that just clicked in all the right ways to make each other feel like at least one person out there cared about them, and they did.

2. Enver Gortash is autistic/ADHD and Durge was his favourite person to info dump on. I mean look at him. My wife is autistic and they have very similar mannerism and ways of thinking. (In the logical sense anyway my wife hasn’t killed anyone) Especially with how his parents described how brilliant he was even as a child, I can just imagine child Enver coming off as annoying and needy to everyone around him because he wanted to talk about his inventions and no one cared to listen. Durge, on the other hand, grew up in a temple where they were expected to behave a certain way and was essentially treated as a puppet, even if they could’ve called the shots how they wanted to. I can’t imagine being a child taken into a murder cult and feeling anything but fear, even if you don’t need to be afraid. Durge knew nothing but blood and death for years, and along comes this funky little guy that wants to rant for hours about the kind of metal he wants to build his steel watch out of?? Yeah. They loved that shit.

3. Enver is a pansexual monster fucker that will love your Durge no matter what. This man has been so lonely for so long that I genuinely think he doesn’t care what package the love comes in so long as he isn’t being used anymore. You’re a Dragonborn? Cool he can work with that. A tiefling? Excellent he’s gonna use those horns as handlebars. A cute half-elf that has a surprising appetite for blood? Absolutely and can he join the next blood bath please?? He loves seeing you work

4. Durge did not want to be Bhaal’s scion. I know a lot of people don’t like how the Durge opening makes it seem like they’re trying to “erase” that Durge was evil, but I view it more as perhaps Durge was never willing. Just because you’re fathered by a murder god doesn’t make you a murderer, and amnesia doesn’t really change who a person is, they just forget. Your brain literally just won’t let you recall memories. Now personally, I’m all for if you think your Durge hates everything about being the Chosen, or (like for my Durge) you think they just hated not being in control of themselves or allowed to kill as they please. Both are great mechanics for a well-rounded character, but I really think either way, Durge hated being what their father made them into, and would have jumped the moment they could escape. The prayer of forgiveness? A classic here’s my fake apology abusive parent so I can spare myself more abuse.

5. Enver whored himself out as a young man to get lots of power and money and he hated every second of it. We know it’s canon that he slept around a lot before the present day setting of the game, but I don’t think he ever enjoyed it. Not really. He grew up in the HoH where he was beaten and abused and nearly tortured to death on many occasions. He finally escapes with nothing to his name and once again he’s at the mercy of whoever he can convince to give him food, shelter, money, etc for the price of his body. This man absolutely has two wolves inside of him and one is a god complex and the other is an ego so crippled and fragile it’s a wonder he ever comes out of the house. When he meets Durge, he’s willing to manipulate them however he must to secure their alliance. He’s done it before, he’ll do it again. I think he’s so very surprised when Durge catches feelings back, when they go out of their way to take care of him, compliment him, even if it’s in their own fucked up fashion. I think the real sticking point for him would be when he and Durge are attending some high society to do together and they run into an old fling. Enver being upset and uncomfortable enough that they leave early and he tells Durge everything. The next day, and the following weeks, he finds severed hands, fingers, bloodied jewellery, all placed at his desk or beside his bed and he can’t help but smile. Durge bringing him pieces of their kills like a cat is so endearing to him.

I’ve got so many more but I think those are my favourite.

[babiebom]

Hiiii. I hope ur ok with my just constantly being like *ahem* spencer reid 👉🏻👈🏻🥹🥹. I loved how you wrote him in the last request! I feel like a lot of the time, people write him very ooc - just bc he can be hard to get written the right way, but like that's my boy, look at him spitting random facts for HOURS 🥰🥰?? Like yes, pls info dump on me while I stare at u lovingly, Spence 💞.

I recently came to terms with being ftm, but it's almost impossible to find any male! reader x Spencer Reid content. Which can be very dysphoric 😵‍💫. Which sucks! Bc holy hell, there are some fuckinnn amazing writers out there writing fanfics.

So now, I have come to you, an amazing writer out here writing fanfics, to beg ask if ud be down to write any kind of oneshot with Spencer Reid dating a male reader! It honestly doesn't have to be anything specific - romantic, angsty, enemies to lovers, slow burn, whatever peaks ur interest atm!

I would just love, love to have that content with Spence & a male reader if you're down for the task! Thank you so so muchh 💓. Hope ur having a wonderful morning / afternoon / evening !

A/N:im sorry this took so long!! I’ve been busy working (blegh) and I wanted to write something sweet for you!! I’m happy you’ve come to terms with being ftm!! As a cis identifying person myself I can’t say that I know how it feels, but I am VERY happy that you’re more comfortable with your identity!! Also never worry about being too “crazy” over Spencer I’ve been obsessed with him since I was about 5 or 6 (yes it’s been a long time)!! I’ll try more to write in a more gender neutral way when writing anything reader insert related that way you can enjoy my writing without feeling left out or anything!! Always let me know if there are things I can do better <3

Tw: maybe some cursing but overall should be wholesome

Wc: 0.54k

Criminal Minds Masterlist

Spencer Reid often came home dejected after a case gone wrong, it was often that he came home tired but happy after a successful case. It wasn’t often, however, that he came home excited for a break; but then again he hadn’t had a boyfriend to come home to on previous breaks. Now, as you watch him walk through the front door of your shared apartment, you can’t help but grin at the absolutely goofy look on his face.

“Emily gave us all 4 weeks off to rest after our latest case, so that means I get four WHOLE weeks of you to myself! Isn’t that great?” He lets out a giggle after he finishes speaking, putting his bag down on the kitchen counter. You didn’t even have to ask him why he was so giddy, he answered unprompted.

“It is great!” You try to match his energy, only seeing him this excited for the first time since you’ve met. He brings you into his embrace, hugging you so tightly that you think you might die if he squeezed you any tighter. “So what are your plans now that you’re a free man for four whole weeks?”

“Well we could go to the park and play chess, or stay here and play chess but I think the sunlight would be good for both of us. Or we could go to the movies, or take a class together, or…”

“Your plans are to just have dates with me every single day?” You ask, quirking an eyebrow.

He nods as if the answer is the most obvious, concrete fact in the universe. He looks at you, not as if you’re dumb, but as if to say ‘duh what else would I be planning to do?’.

The two of you move to sit on the couch, enveloped in each other as he talks about the many, many dates you’re going to go on now that he’s free from his time constricting job. “What if I don’t wanna do those things?” You ask playfully. He shrugs.

“It doesn’t matter what we do, as long as I get to do it with you”.

“Oh?” You look at him as if he said something scandalous, “I didn’t know you had that big of a crush on me.”

He shoves you gently, rolling his eyes at your attempt to joke off his sweet words.

“You’re joking but studies have found that couples who have regular date nights more often result in higher relationship satisfaction, better communication, and a stronger emotional connection. Us going on dates during these four weeks will be better for us in the long run.”

You don’t reply, or interrupt. It’s always amusing to listen to him ramble on and on about facts that he finds interesting or applicable to the conversation. And all it does is make you fall more in love with him, seeing how serious he is about your relationship working out in the future. He says that he loves you often, but it’s things like this; seeing and listening to how much he genuinely cares about your relationship.

Being the boyfriend of a pretty boy genius has its perks, and how much he cares about you compared to others is definitely one of them.

[blueberrypancakesworld]

You are never a mistake

Dmitri Smerdyakov x betrothed!reader

warning : kissing, hurt/comfort, cuddling, emotional, abuse (beating), family problems

Summary : Dmitri thought for a moment that he would be accepted by his father, but when he felt the blow and his wife's intervention almost backfired, the Kravinoff son realized that he had to become strong, not weak. For his love, for someone who loved him as he was, he himself would stand up to his father no matter what a disappointment he was.

info : Finally the first one-shot for Dmitri the cute little beaten up bastard who just needs a little love. I hope you enjoy reading ;)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Many couples around the world meet in cafes while they are both reaching for coffee, looking for life books in the library.

Maybe at a party or through friends, there are moments that last forever and are cherished when you find your partner for life, a relationship that becomes a marriage and an eternal bond with the exchange of rings.

Something that symbolized love and strength a bond when you had your own family maybe even about to start and then there were still the couples that met and a shadow seemed to lie over them forever, a shadow that had a name and didn't even seem to be happy for the love of their own child.

The first time they had met was in their music store, the best and biggest in New York, a store for the elite and those who could afford it.

An old family store that was the heart of every musician and singer from strings to wind instruments to keys and to microphones and stands.

A business that adapted to the talent.

Behind the counter, glancing up every now and then to greet the new buyers, she had seen him first, the slightly wavy blond hair, the cute nose, the little smile on his lips and the gentle demeanor.

The first time she had seen him, she had dared to leave her seat and come to him, seeing how he looked a little lost as he stood in the piano section.

She knew the feeling of being lost in a place you were interested in, not quite knowing whether to move or stand still.

The first time she had heard him play in her shop was the day she no longer saw her customer as just a customer, she saw his strength, his art, his beauty as he seemed to be absorbed in playing the piano.

There was a talent, a dedication in it and his voice, that voice she could have listened to for hours, made her hum along even when it seemed to be just the two of them in her shop.

,,A wonderful talent, really beautiful" her praise came from the purest heart...but for him, for Dmitri Kravinoff, it was the first time anyone had recognized him in what he was good at.

It was the first time for Nikolai's son that someone had inspired him in what he did and it was the first time that he lost his heart to her on the spot.

The day they exchanged numbers so that he could deliver the piano she had chosen to the club and also so that he could take her out for a meal at the end of the day.

It was on that day that two people had found each other and that only some time later it was more than just a relationship and fleeting dates, it was a bond between the two young people to whom the world was open...or so it seemed at first glance.

For the first few months it was like that, moving in together, partying, having fun, traveling everywhere, gifts that went from expensive to cheap to homemade and then to something more intimate the more they opened up and trusted each other.

The more she realized who his family was, what he was, but most of all what he had experienced, his ,,I-I understand if you hate me now...I wouldn't stop you if you wanted to leave” surprised her but most of all hurt her that he gave up on him so easily.

That her talented, precious, wonderful, gentle Dmitri, who kissed her on the forehead every morning, who did everything you could do with her and who dedicated every song in his club to her with such love and kindness, thought so little of himself.

Who had hurt him so much?

Who hurt him so much that every loud noise made him flinch, that he almost cried during an argument over trivial things and how he hated it when animal documentaries came on TV, little things she would have overlooked but with what she knew she just wanted to hold him in her arms.

Who had hurt him so much that he saw himself as nothing, which she tried to talk him out of every time ,,Dmitri my beautiful star I don't care who your family is, it's us who are together and not your last name” she tried to explain to him that he was the most important thing she had.

That her kisses and hugs, her words and gestures had the same loving effect as he had on her, that they had each other and when she threatened to kiss him every time he thought something like that again.

Dmitri finally seemed to find his smile again, ,,Do it," he just said, and he pulled her into a kiss as they lay cuddled together on the couch.

Together they gave each other the support they needed, Dmitri kept her motivation up whenever she wanted to give up with her msuik and she lovingly told him every day how good he was, that he was loved and above all that he was not alone.

The two of them in the club they had built with Dmitri's family money was their common pride, a club for the rich customers of the city.

A club where she could recommend her regular customers and the best entertainment was guaranteed with his piano and singing as well as her violin playing which made for a pleasant atmosphere.

Almost every evening, the two of them stood on the small stage and performed their harmony, ,,I dedicate this song to my beautiful fiancée,” he announced, while she joined in with her violin and the soft music amused the guests.

His blue eyes kept going to her, the smile was returned and she gave him a wordless ,,I love you” which he reciprocated, it couldn't have been better for the couple... until the moment when Dmitri's eyes fell on a man, a certain someone who came into his club and almost made the Russian play the wrong music.

With a hand movement that made the music continue to play by itself from the equipment hanging on the walls, and she saw how he smoothed out his jacket.

Everything will be fine, she thought he wanted to tell him, but he had already gone to his father, who had sat down in one of the recesses in the walls, looking directly at the stage from which she also came down to follow her fiancé.

Nikoali was a man of strength, a man you didn't want to mess with and yet there was no avoiding him, ,,Father, we're glad you're here, can I offer you something?” Dmitri asked and got a hug and a gesture she didn't get instead Nikolai gave the back of her hand a kiss and she gave him a quick friendly look.

It seemed that Dmitri was the only thing keeping her future father-in-law from killing her-what a luck.

But as long as Dmitri was happy and had his father, the two should get along, ,,I'll get a few glasses,” she let the men know as Nikolai gave his son a bottle of expensive wine.

A gift of value not from the heart but it made no sense to the son his father was here and happy that was all that mattered...so she thought.

It was just a moment when she pulled out the wine glasses in the kitchen at the back of the club, not wanting to take any more advantage of the waiters who had a long shift ahead of them.

The glasses in her hands and a smile on her lips, she heard the muffled noise and a crash, rushing back into the main room she saw Nikolai had pushed Dmitri against a wall, knocking over the table and no one was doing anything.

,,Dmitri! Let him go!” she shouted at the older man, afraid that he would seriously hurt his son, because the horrible stories that sent shivers down her spine told her everything she needed to know about the underworld boss.

Her fiancé's attempts to get free were unsuccessful, so without hesitation she picked up one of the glasses and threw it against the wall next to Nikolai, ,,Let him go and get out of our club,” she continued to threaten.

An empty threat that amused the dark-haired man, who was already lifting the next glass when he let go of his son, who slumped to the floor, barely able to support himself.

,,Even your bitch has more courage than you, shame on you,” Nikolai said to his son and walked past her with an appraising look, hurrying to her fiancé as soon as the door closed and he fell onto the nearest chair, ,,Are you all right? To the hospital?” she asked, trying to wipe the blood from his lip with a slapped hand from the blow his father had given him.

He looked terrified, as if all joy and hope had drained out of him once more, but he just shook his head before he simply poured out a tearful ,,You're fine” into her arms and she embraced the couple just lying in each other's arms for a few moments.

They held each other until Dmitri calmed down and his tears had stopped, the decision to close the club early was hardly one because it looked like a mob had gone wild there and not just Nikolai, ,,Your heart is too big for the world,” she told him as they rode back to the apartment together in a cab.

Her hand didn't leave his and stroking his head at least reassured him but the look in his eyes, she had never seen such hatred, whether it was just the confrontation or something else she couldn't say.

Whatever it was it seemed to keep him occupied the whole time no matter what they both did, no amount of embracing or kissing could break his blcik until the moment they lay in bed together.

She cuddled up to him and he gave her a good after kiss she couldn't shake the feeling that something else was going to happen.

Even though she felt safe in his arms, he stroked her side until she fell asleep like he did every night, usually soothing them both, the sound of the door opening and closing was something she didn't realize, didn't realize how Dmitri had to do something.

It was one thing when he was pushed around, he had been pushed around all his life but now that he had his fiancée he wouldn't let his father get away with it.

Knowing she was safe in the apartment sleeping peacefully, it was the Kravinoff who set off through the city at night to his father and it was only the clanging and rattling of cupboards that woke his fiancée from her slumber.

,,Dmitri?” the question came cautiously as she groped beside her but he wasn't there, but the sounds from the apartment frightened her.

No one had a key except for the two of them, pulling the covers aside she reached for the water bottle next to her bed, quietly and carefully venturing out of the bedroom, she saw the shadow in the hallway that seemed to be raging in the kitchen.

She should have called the police, anyone, but what if Dmitri was in danger?

She was ready to sleep with the bottle tighter if ever, she cried out in fear when she saw Dmitri, who seemed to be looking for something in the kitchen and looked completely exhausted, ,,What the hell? Dmitri darling what are you doing?” she asked putting the bottle down.

Seeing the torn clothes, the fuzzy hair, the black eye but most of all the bloody knuckles as if he had hit himself or better said as if someone had hit him.

Seeing what he had failed to find, however, she grabbed the first aid kit and went with him to the couch, ,,I well...I told my father never to insult you again and then there was a little altercation” he began to confess as she gave a makeshift dressing to his wounds which fortunately did not require stitches or hospitalization.

His courage touched her as she realized that he had pushed away the person he had once needed the most for her, ,,I've never loved you more and well...next time we'll both beat him up” she suggested and felt the kiss he gave her as they both laughed at the idea.

But in his eyes the look of gentleness and love was there again and not the hate ,,I love you too" he replied and she pressed a kiss to the bandage on his hand which should make the pain less.

At least Dmitri didn't seem to be in pain, not when they kissed, not when she continued to nurse him and he proudly told her how he had told his father off, and not when his hand stroked the engagement ring on her hand as they made love and finally seemed free of the gray of the Kravinoff family.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ @tori111777 , @bel0ved-heretic , @amecchii , @xxxibgdrgons , @lordbelzeebub , @simonsrealwife

[antivanbrandy]

i wanted to take a crack at the relationship chart meme for bg3, but made life harder for myself in the process by doodling everyone asdfghjkl

a bit of info about the relationships under the readmore!

so to start from the top and work around clockwise:

Astarion: her best friend, her partner, and love of her life. his flippant hot-n-cold attitude at the start of their relationship (she failed that first big insight check so she didn't know it was all an act at the start) leaves her feeling bad about herself at times, but once they have their Act 2 heart-to-heart, their relationship only goes from strength to strength. we all know what a supportive and loving tav does for spawn!Astarion, but over the course of their adventure he supports her, too. they make each other stronger.

Rhapsody's self sacrificing need to help everyone, no matter how thin it spreads her, comes dangerously close to breaking her by late Act 2. Astarion talks her back from the ledge, so to speak, and helps her realise why she's doing it (Family Trauma Hour 2, Shitty Father Boogaloo) and the harm it's doing her in turn. it's purely self-interest that motivates him at first, because if she burns out then his protection and best chance at taking on Cazador goes with her, but once he comes to care for her his motives are much kinder.

i have so many post-game thoughts for these two, which includes an eventual cast of good old Reincarnation (which i honest to god rolled for and nearly squawked at the outcome) and the very specific complicated feelings that digs up for them, but if i keep typing i'll be here all day.

-

Gale: truly one of her best friends. she could sit with him in silence, just reading together, or her playing an instrument while he studies the weave, and be perfectly content. Rhaps is a lore bard, so she really enjoys swapping stories, information, and theories with him. she's also a big fan of his cooking, and enjoys the simple companionship of doing vegetable prep while he cooks and they chat together. she'd go to bat for him against anyone.

-

Wyll: a dear friend, and inspiration for more than one epic ballad (which makes him proud-blush every time). they swap tales, often together with Karlach, and he's been known to join her in a song and dance when she plays at camp if he's feeling in the spirits. they bond over complicated relationships with their fathers, love of good red wine, and most importantly, their unflinching dedication to helping people in need.

-

Lae'zel: their relationship is complicated. they both operate on a level the other just does not understand, and chafe against the others attitude to life. they grow to respect each other, but never truly become friends, which is sad because Lae'zel does get to a point where she'd like to extend that offer but has no idea how to voice her growing fondness, and then the adventure is over and she leaves with Voss.

-

Minsc: definitely a friend, even if they're not especially close. for his part, Minsc is delighted when Rhaps comes up with a little ditty about him ('from top to tail, evildoers do fear - Boo gnaws their eyes, Minsc kicks their rear!').

-

Jaheira: Rhaps' liked Jaheira immediately, as soon as she clocked the wine was spiked and Jaheira gave her that knowing smile and asked her to drink anyway. Rhaps grew up starved for parental approval and attention, and there's an undeniable current of Momther™ that carries with Jaheira's approval, stories, pick me ups, and pep talks that she latches onto very quickly. Jaheria herself is reluctant to be seen as a mother figure, she has her own kids after all, riiiiiight up until the point the gang come face to face with Rhaps and Aisling's father and she sees first hand how she's treated and how much she wilts in his company. After that it's just kind of defiant instinct, if a parental-flavoured pep talk is what the cub needs to get through the end of days, that's what she'll get, and her old man can go get fucked.

-

Shadowheart: Shadowheart and Rhapsody have a rocky start - Shart's combative attitude puts Rhaps on the backfoot, and they have a two steps forward one step back slow-crawl to understanding each other. There's a bit of a blow-up between them in the shadowlands that sets them back even more; Shadowheart's constant sneering and too-edgy-for-you remarks regarding Selune and Selunite magic grate on Rhapsody, who is already spread desperately thin by this point and is absolutely baffled Shart can't keep it buttoned for ONE minute when Selune is all that's standing between the people at Last Light -the tieflings she fought tooth n nail to save- and a gruesome death. and the more evidence they see of Shar's cruelty in the shadowlands, the more Rhaps begins to truly understand what Shar is capable of and the thinner she's spread from trying to help people in this bleak situation, the closer she gets to lashing out, until eventually Shadowheart goes one snippy comment too far and Rhaps blows up at her. they have it out, and it's bad, but when they eventually make up afterwards theyre stronger for it, and by the end of Act 3 theyre a lot closer than they ever thought possible.

-

Halsin: Halsin is a calming presence in Rhapsody's life. she thought turning down his offer was going to make things awkward for them, but it never did. there's a lot to learn from him, and a call to a calmer life and a sense of peace that Rhaps feels most keenly when she's out in nature with him. the druidic life isn't for her, but those moments of peace do wonders for her when she needs it.

-

Karlach: darling dearest bestest friend, platonic love of her life, sister from another mister, 'would absolutely ride the rollercoaster in the front car with you' bestest best friend forever. Rhapsody adores Karlach, admires and is inspired by her. Rhapsody has had very little interaction with other tieflings, and in comes Karlach full of friendly cheer and good humour and a massive heart, emotional vulnerability and honesty and cheeky smiles, all things Rhaps is drawn to and wants to be. she'd do anything for her, go to any lengths, and I can't even begin to describe how heartbroken this makes her on that dock at the end.

[spiritofthemountainnaturephoto]

Lets talk about Wildlife Photography

I think social media makes it a hard thing to get into. Amazing locations are shown, awesome gear, and fit people that go on crazy long hikes.

I would like to share my perspective from someone that is far from well off. I feel it's easy to look at something online and wish for that life. I do it to often myself.

I started fully getting into wildlife photography myself around two years. I have both autoimmune and neurological issues so my hikes are often limited. When I do get out on hikes (usually only up to 2 miles at most) I can't do much else for a week. My gear is either pre owned or was financed over small payments. 95% of my photos were taken from my car.

Good places to look and when

(Some things may vary from state to state all of my opinions are formed from my experiences)

First off timing, dusk and dawn. Timing it out where the animals are out and you still have good lighting is rough. Preferably, you would like every animal to be out during golden hour, but that often doesn't happen.

Try finding Facebook groups for any refuge or park to get an idea of where and when the animals may be at your local parks.

Wildlife refuges are a great place to look for animals, but can be limited on access and be a bit more seasonal. You'll almost always see atleast one animal, but timing out when the animals you are looking for tend to hangout here may take a bit. For instance the elk at my local refuge winter here but are basically non-existent in the summer.

County roads are a great place to cruise around looking for wildlife. The farms tend to hold deer. Especially if your in an area that grows alot of corn 🌽. They can also have a ton of pronghorn if you live in the prairie.

Neighborhood parks. Especially with mule deer, I find more bucks wandering neighborhoods than the back country. These parks tend to be great for some of the more common birds as well.

National parks, State Parks, and National Forests are always wonderful places to find wildlife. Depending on location, they can be far and few. There's usually more info about animal locations for these. Whether that be social media groups or large groups of stopped cars when your in the park.

You'll probably have to drive a bit unless your in a prime location. My favorite place to see wildlife is 2 hours away.

Frequency

You will have amazing days that feel like pure magic with a bounty of awesome opportunities. Then you will have a week or weeks where you don't see anything. Maybe you do see an animal, but they are in a junkyard, too far away, or the lighting is just too bad and they aren't there the next morning. You will be frustrated, and no matter how much you think you know these animals and their habitats. They are still wild animals. Maybe it was a warmer winter or the hunting pressure that year was higher? Either way, there are times you just don't get lucky.

Gear

Start with something beginner friendly don't jump into a super high end DSLR. They are complicated and can be very confusing. I would recommend a D3300 or something from that series. You can find some on eBay with lenses for around $300. The 55-200mm kit lens it often comes with is a wonderful lens to start off with.

Practice

It's good to practice on domestic animals. Whether that be your pet cat or a horse alongside the road. I did horse photography for years before I got into wildlife photography. Going to horse shows can be a great way to practice motion shots and get a feel for your settings. Oftentimes, with wildlife the opportunity window for a shot is only seconds.

There's a ton of wonderful camera specific help if you look up your camera model with the word "guide" "help" or "tips" on YouTube.

Nikon Teaching Photography on Facebook is an abundant resource. There's many wonderful camera help groups on Facebook.

Random tips

Write down everything and try to put an answer to these questions in the summary. What animal did you see? what time was it? what day? how cold was it?

Some animals are creatures of habitat, and others tend to be more random. For me, my local elk tend to generally stick to more of a schedule, and the mule deer are pure chaos lol.

Bring basic survival items in your car if you plan on heading out into the back country. Extra food, water, battery packs, jumper cables, a shovel, first aid kit.

It's better to turn around than to be stuck miles back into the forest without service. The super muddy or snowy trail isn't worth it unless you plan on walking it.

[xbeezchaos]

BPD Scaramouche Pt.2

We’re back again with another scara with my bpd life experiences. But this time. I’m gonna make a list of things that I’ve done in a relationship and what I feel like he’d do as well. So here you go 🖤

He’s very loyal to you, obsessed really, he loves everything about you

He spends his time with you memorizing everything he could about you. Down to the very last detail.

His love language is a bit of a mix, but the top ones are gift giving and words of affirmation. He enjoyed physical touch a lot contrary to popular belief. But he’s not one to be ok with PDA.

Lots of pet names. And I mean a lot. Not really a trial and error thing but more like the more cute pet names he has for you the better.

His favorites to use are “bubs, honey, and sweetheart.”

Hyper sexual and touchy but also touch starved. Loves the idea of being able to feel you up and be felt up sensually without venturing further after that.

If you’re just friends with him, but give him anything from a pet name to special attention— he’ll flirt with you and become obsessed if it’s enough.

Can and will have meltdowns/anxiety attacks if he doesn’t feel heard when he’s talking or arguing

Will offer to use arson, murder, and multiple kinds of vehicles to crush anyone who hurts or annoys you

Recommends gaslighting as a way to prevent yourself from trouble

Loves stuffed animals. Buys way too many that match his aesthetic and will hurt anyone who gets them dirty.

Will go above and beyond for gifts. It doesn’t matter how much money, time or effort it takes. For you, anything and everything was always worth it.

Will keep a book with your info in it. From blood type to family and friends along with how to contact them

If you’re not home when he is or you disappear. He’ll freak out and do everything in his power to track you down if you’re gone for too long

If the above thing happens and he has to track you down. Where ever you are he WILL tackle you and have a sort of meltdown admitting how he thought something happened to you

He’d rather die than let anyone think they’ll ever have a chance with you. He loves showing you off every where he goes.

He’ll never miss a chance to kiss you. Sit you on his lap, hug you, fight someone for you, or hold your waist and rub circles in them

Is a sucker for love notes/poems. If he’s ever upset with you. No matter how big or small, slip him one of those and he’ll be easier to talk to than ever

Soft spots? Target his neck, hair, waist, and legs. Best way to really overpower him if you want.

If you’re taller than him >>>> use that to your advantage. He secretly loves when you’re taller

Let him pick you up, treat you like royalty. But he will expect the same treatment in return

Hates when people are overly sexual upon first meeting. He’ll push you away and get disgusted

Takes anywhere from a few months to a few years to open up entirely and it all depends on trust

When he gets comfortable he can be so raunchy and down bad it’s scary and can sometimes be addicting. All dependent on your taste

Does well with kids. But hates them. Likes laughing at the dumb stuff they do.

Loves doing your hair. And if he doesn’t know how to do something. He will learn just for you.

Will dress you up like his own little doll, he just loves the idea that he gets to make you all the more pretty and show off the outfits he makes for you to wear throughout your day.

Steals your clothes to sleep with them/wear them around all day. He doesn’t care what it is. If he can fit it into his outfits trust he’s wearing it.

A conversation held after you were gone for a surprise commission for 12 hours:

[Your Name]”What did you do?! There’s 200 missed calls on my phone and over 40 text messages on each app!”

[Scara]“At least you know I care. I even called a few hospitals to make sure you weren’t admitted. So ungrateful.”

[Name] “Why did you do that?! This is so baaad!”

[Scara] “If you think that’s bad wait until you find out I told every hospital we’re engaged to be married. Haha!”

You didn’t find that part very funny

Anyways. This concludes another part to Scara with BPD! Let me know if you’d like more and my ask box is very very open. 💋

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for obviously covering my nose and mouth around smokers at work? (Tw for a very brief mention of sexual assault and mentions of bigotry)

To preface I'm fully aware that WHAT I'm trying to do is justified, I just don't know if the HOW is a problem.

Some context about my working conditions: I work in an outdoors location. I sit at a table at the front gate and check bags and permit entry. Where I sit is a fairly small open area at the base of a large set of stairs before the place people are actually coming to see. Smoking, drinking, etc is allowed everywhere on premise including the small area I sit at for eight hours a night. 90% of the patients drink (not the point of the post but to display how lax the type of event I work at is), and 50% of the adults MINIMUM smoke. The ticket booth is right beside my booth and people will stand there for up to 5 minutes on a not too busy night smoking as they wait. The customer base is nearly entirely white and almost 100% Republican. They wear MAGA hats, fly confederate flags, wear blue lives matter shirts, and try to yell at me about chemtrails if I don't shoo them away from me. I've been sexually assaulted, harassed for being Russian(?????????), called anti-trans slurs, have had weapons pulled on me, etc. And as I've said....... pretty much all the patrons are drunk. So I CAN NOT wear a mask for my own immediate safety. This is also not an every day issue as I work for an event specifically that only takes place once or twice a month

Now as to why smoking is an issue: I'm allergic to cigarette smoke. I don't remember exactly what part causes the reaction but I very quickly have a reaction to it. I assume it's something most every non smoker goes through experiencing second hand smoke: nausea, vomiting, dizziness, fainting, etc. It just happens to me VERY quickly. Now, if they don't have bags for me to check and just breeze on by after getting their tickets, I hold my breath for a quick minute until the air at least doesn't actively feel gross to breathe in. Minute is an exaggeration, because of a disability I have I can't hold my breath for more than 20 seconds. When people with bags for me to check come to my table and are smoking, I try to severely limit my breathing until it's done because I'm directly dealing with the customers and have to breathe. Where my methods might be asshole-ish come into play with the people who choose to stand around and smoke instead of leaving the area

I use my shirt/jacket to cover my mouth and nose. When it's cold I try to at least make it look like a keeping myself warm thing. It's not perfect, it's not like I'm suddenly immune to second hand smoke, but if they're only around for five minutes or so it does WONDERS keeping me from getting sick. I used to try harder not to be obvious about it, but going home throwing up and sneezing out tar for days after I work so many times has made me a bit more "idgaf if they're offended by it" sometimes. The thing is, I don't WANT to be rude about it though. My goal here isn't to cause a problem, which is the biggest concern with the customer base, but to just keep myself safe. When I try to just suck it up and take no measures to reduce the amount of smoke I'm directly inhaling, I've gotten so violently ill I've been unable to actually do my job. Admittedly I've never made a serious attempt to just ask people to not smoke around me, but in my defense it's because the response in the past has been for people to flick their cigarette ash at me and get up in my face. I think I might be too replaceable for there to be any kind of enforceable rule about not smoking in my direct vicinity

So I repeat: AITA for covering my face at work when people smoke right beside me? (And if so, any other solutions you could think of would be nice!)

What are these acronyms?