#cm dribbles

[babiebom]

Hiiii. I hope ur ok with my just constantly being like *ahem* spencer reid 👉🏻👈🏻🥹🥹. I loved how you wrote him in the last request! I feel like a lot of the time, people write him very ooc - just bc he can be hard to get written the right way, but like that's my boy, look at him spitting random facts for HOURS 🥰🥰?? Like yes, pls info dump on me while I stare at u lovingly, Spence 💞.

I recently came to terms with being ftm, but it's almost impossible to find any male! reader x Spencer Reid content. Which can be very dysphoric 😵‍💫. Which sucks! Bc holy hell, there are some fuckinnn amazing writers out there writing fanfics.

So now, I have come to you, an amazing writer out here writing fanfics, to beg ask if ud be down to write any kind of oneshot with Spencer Reid dating a male reader! It honestly doesn't have to be anything specific - romantic, angsty, enemies to lovers, slow burn, whatever peaks ur interest atm!

I would just love, love to have that content with Spence & a male reader if you're down for the task! Thank you so so muchh 💓. Hope ur having a wonderful morning / afternoon / evening !

A/N:im sorry this took so long!! I’ve been busy working (blegh) and I wanted to write something sweet for you!! I’m happy you’ve come to terms with being ftm!! As a cis identifying person myself I can’t say that I know how it feels, but I am VERY happy that you’re more comfortable with your identity!! Also never worry about being too “crazy” over Spencer I’ve been obsessed with him since I was about 5 or 6 (yes it’s been a long time)!! I’ll try more to write in a more gender neutral way when writing anything reader insert related that way you can enjoy my writing without feeling left out or anything!! Always let me know if there are things I can do better <3

Tw: maybe some cursing but overall should be wholesome

Wc: 0.54k

Criminal Minds Masterlist

Spencer Reid often came home dejected after a case gone wrong, it was often that he came home tired but happy after a successful case. It wasn’t often, however, that he came home excited for a break; but then again he hadn’t had a boyfriend to come home to on previous breaks. Now, as you watch him walk through the front door of your shared apartment, you can’t help but grin at the absolutely goofy look on his face.

“Emily gave us all 4 weeks off to rest after our latest case, so that means I get four WHOLE weeks of you to myself! Isn’t that great?” He lets out a giggle after he finishes speaking, putting his bag down on the kitchen counter. You didn’t even have to ask him why he was so giddy, he answered unprompted.

“It is great!” You try to match his energy, only seeing him this excited for the first time since you’ve met. He brings you into his embrace, hugging you so tightly that you think you might die if he squeezed you any tighter. “So what are your plans now that you’re a free man for four whole weeks?”

“Well we could go to the park and play chess, or stay here and play chess but I think the sunlight would be good for both of us. Or we could go to the movies, or take a class together, or…”

“Your plans are to just have dates with me every single day?” You ask, quirking an eyebrow.

He nods as if the answer is the most obvious, concrete fact in the universe. He looks at you, not as if you’re dumb, but as if to say ‘duh what else would I be planning to do?’.

The two of you move to sit on the couch, enveloped in each other as he talks about the many, many dates you’re going to go on now that he’s free from his time constricting job. “What if I don’t wanna do those things?” You ask playfully. He shrugs.

“It doesn’t matter what we do, as long as I get to do it with you”.

“Oh?” You look at him as if he said something scandalous, “I didn’t know you had that big of a crush on me.”

He shoves you gently, rolling his eyes at your attempt to joke off his sweet words.

“You’re joking but studies have found that couples who have regular date nights more often result in higher relationship satisfaction, better communication, and a stronger emotional connection. Us going on dates during these four weeks will be better for us in the long run.”

You don’t reply, or interrupt. It’s always amusing to listen to him ramble on and on about facts that he finds interesting or applicable to the conversation. And all it does is make you fall more in love with him, seeing how serious he is about your relationship working out in the future. He says that he loves you often, but it’s things like this; seeing and listening to how much he genuinely cares about your relationship.

Being the boyfriend of a pretty boy genius has its perks, and how much he cares about you compared to others is definitely one of them.

[readerinsertz]

Hi! I saw that your requests are open but it didn’t specify if you were comfortable with doing pregnancy fluff.

If you are comfortable with that I’d like to request Kagami or Murasakibara with a pregnant s/o where they feel the baby kick for the first time or something similar

If not that’s fine as well! Thanks!

AN: this got away with me- just a lot of fluff and some kicks

Okay first of all this man is gonna be terrified

Becoming a dad, bringing life into this world? Panik.

He's great at basketball but everything else, he's less good with lol

After a short period of shock and panic, he'll definitely get over it

Maybe playing some basketball with his friends helps get his head the right way

Will not let you do anything

He's your servant for the next 9 months

Makes it very well known that you're not to hesitate if you want anything

More than happy to run to a shop at 2am to buy something for you

But adores when you ask for his home cooking

Probably will bulk cook and then freeze them when he's got the time for when baby arrives

He assembles pretty much all the stuff in the nursery although he doesn't follow the instructions and ends up getting it wrong so you have to also help

Will eventually accept your help but he's holding everything, bringing everything to you, setting everything up. You try to put up a mobile which weighs nothing but he sees you on tip-toes and is moving before he realises to stop you

When you get a bit further along, he calms down a bit

Always always ALWAYS has a hand on you in some way- hand on your thigh, arm around your shoulders or waist

Gets a bit cocky because everyone KNOWS he made you pregnant

Puffs his chest out when men glance at you two and then immediately turns into a teddy bear when you turn and ask him something mundane

Takes you to all your appointments, arranges all the dates and times for you- all you have to do is show up lol

Researches on the internet and brings questions to the doctor

Some are reasonable like what food should he make for you, what vitamins are helpful, sleep positions?

Also, will ask completely straight-faced about other things like your mucus plug

I feel like he doesn't even think to ask about doing anything remotely sexual with you- he's so focused on your well being. You'll have to be the one to ask the doctor

Also very attentive and actually takes notes when you go to those baby classes- like this man studies. He puts more effort than any school exam

Probably will call your bump his basketball

Is soooo overjoyed when in the later weeks, you paint the bump as a basketball

I did some research and the average basketball has a radius of 38cm and the average bump is like 30cm so maybe your bump won't be the same size as an actual basketball but Kagami will continue to measure its growth

"It's half the size of a basketball!" "It's almost the size of one!"

Only when he's more confident will he lightly pat your bump like he's dribbling a basketball

You go with him to training just once. He doesn't trust that the basketball won't accidentally be sent to where you're sitting on the bench.

It's cute until you have this 190+cm man hovering around you like that Spongebob caveman meme constantly. Everyone agrees it's better if you don't come again

Definitely does that thing where he cradles and holds your bump up for you from behind- researched how to help his partner and did it and you were !!!! please continue

Anyway, he always splays his large hand over your bump-it's comforting to feel both you and your child under his palm

During one of these, the baby kicks whilst he's staring at the TV

Whips his head over to look at you, incredulous and asking if you felt that too

Pulls your shirt up to examine your belly and tickles the area where baby had kicked to try and get them to do it again

It's another source of closeness- you're carrying the baby so you're connected 24/7 for 9 months but he only gets those moments to be physically close to baby so yea he's gonna try to get his baby to kick as much as possible

Like those gifs where the baby's hand appears bulging out of the skin? loooooves it

Will start scolding the baby when they're kicking too much

"You're not a footballer/soccer player!" will then immediately go against his words and tell you regardless of what sport they're gonna play, if any, he'll support them no matter

You get a special maternity shirt with his number and name on it, he's elated when he sees it

Will probably buy a matching set for you him and baby

You probably steal all his shirts- they're big enough to cover your bump and they're comfy and smell like him

He will purposefully buy more so you can "steal" them

Would make a bump cast and then paint it the colour of a basketball and put it with all his other trophies

Murasakibara is lot more calm than Kagami

"You're pregnant? nice."

Probably leaves you wondering if he actually knows what's going on

So takes you by surprise when he asks if you should be eating a coffee flavoured doughnut

You get upset and mad from the pregnancy hormones thinking he's calling you fat

Will have to pull you into his arms and stroke your hair to comfort you and tell you that doctors recommend no more than 2 cups of coffee and that you've already had your allotted coffee earlier

That makes you cry more because you're 1) guilty for doubting him and 2) touched he's actually researching stuff

I feel like he'll probably stop you from eating too many bad things like sweets and chocolate so you and baby are healthy. But at the same time, I think when he sees you struggling or not looking happy he'll give you some to cheer you up cuz that cheers him up

Will love to take naps with you- pulls you back into the bed and tells you you need your rest

Moves so he's facing your bump and then complains to it about you trying to leave

Will be eating one of his snacks and then halfway, will offer it to your bump

You're just like Atsushi wtf?

I think he'll be a bit more grumpy than Kagami if you ask him for something at 2am- will grumble but drag himself out of bed. When he comes back he has what you asked for but also other food cravings that he knows you'll want after your pickle-only burger

If you're struggling with not eating sweet things he will go on a diet with you too. This man shows his love through acts of service

Once again his hand is MASSIVE so yea he will be able to wrap his palm around your bump completely

Like no matter how big you get, he will make you feel small

The first time he feels the baby kick he doesn't react. Takes a few seconds to process what just happened

"Huh? Someone kicked me," he pouts

He goes so soft when he realises- there's so much love and adoration on his face as he looks down at your belly

Will whisper a quite "hi"

After a while, he'll complain about the kicks

"Why do they like kicking me? No fair!

Shopping for baby things is pretty intense. They're so small and he's so big

Has a mini panic at how small his baby is going to be- he's scared that he's gonna hurt his child or he's gonna break the toys

With how big he is, you assure him you'll be giving birth to a big baby

Holds up the tiny outfits with a look of awe and amazement that humans can be that small

Definitely buys a fruit each week the same size as your baby to track the growth

Sometimes he has to buy in bulk and you're like what are we gonna do with a kilogram of raisins!

He bakes things with them- feels a bit weird eating the raisin he's been busy all week claiming was his baby but it becomes a tradition you grow to look forward to

In the first two trimesters, he's just about willing to travel to countries close by to play but only for a week and only the closest

The final trimester it's almost impossible for him to go and play even if it's in Japan just in a city that's a few hours away

He'll only go if you're with him and then he fusses over you for the entire journey

Will always point at you when he does something cool in the match

Probably will run his hands down his stomach and over an imaginary bump to dedicate that move to your baby

Will unironically put a basketball under his shirt to see what it's like

Aomine tells him he forgot boobs so then he puts some oranges down as well.

Complains when the oranges fall and calls you

"My orange-boobs are too small. They fall!" .... "Your what, Atsushi?"

Lets you clingfilm a watermelon to his stomach and idk what sort of fruit for boobs

He's okay with it for like 5 minutes and then complains about the weight

The fucker will sit down with a big sigh, turns to you and totally serious will go "eugh, pregnancy, amirite?"

So he's bad at handling small things. When you get too big to bend over and put your shoes on and tie the laces, he does try! But it's too fiddley so he buys you multiple velcro shoes

They make you feel like an old woman.... but they are convenient, you'll begrudgingly admit

You find him using your bump cast as a container for his snacks

[owlobservation]

Itoshi Rin Profile from Egoist Bible (2022)

"To me, soccer is a battle to death."

Bluelock Ranking: 1 (at the beginning of second selection)

Weapons: Kicking accuracy, technique, tactical vision, physical ability.

Birthdate: September, 9th.

Age: 16 (First year high school)

Zodiac sign: Virgo.

Birthplace: Kanagawa Prefecture (Kamakura City)

Family structure: Father, mother, older brother, himself.

Height: 186 cm.

Foot size: 27.5 cm.

Blood type: A.

Dominant foot: Right.

Favorite soccer player: David Beckham. "I respect his kicks."

Age started playing soccer: For as long as I can remember. "I grew up watching my big brother play."

Motto: "The field is a battlefield", "Tepid" (habit)

Strengths: I can play soccer. "Anything else doesn't matter."

Weaknesses: Unfriendly. "If you don't like it then don't bother me."

Favorite food: Ochazuke. "Especially sea bream chazuke."

Disliked food: Vinegared dish. "I don't like sour things."

Best rice accompaniment: Tuna. "Soy sauce and wasabi combo is the winner. No objection."

Hobby: Getting the chills from horror games and horror movies.

Favorite season: Autumn. "I like it when it's a bit chilly."

Favorite music: King Gnu in general. "Especially Prayer X."

Favorite movie: Horror movie in general. "Especially The Shining."

Favorite manga: Dragon Head and Ciguatera.

Character color: Turquoise Blue.

Favorite animal: Owl. "I'm fascinated by them. I think it's the eyes."

Best subjects: Physical Education, Art.

Weak subjects: Calligraphy. "I hate having to write exactly as I'm taught."

What makes you happy: I don't know.

What makes you sad?: When someone is better at soccer than me. "So far it's only my big brother."

Last year's valentine day chocolates: I don't remember because I rejected and returned all of them.

Sleep time: 7,5 hours.

Where do you wash first in the bath?: The eyes with warm water

What do you like to buy at the convenient store?: Eye masks that warm the eyes.

Mushroom or Bamboo Shoots: Mushroom.

What made you cry recently?: I don't cry.

At what age did you stop receiving presents from Santa?: 8 years old. "When my big brother stopped getting them I followed him and stopped getting them too... Truthfully, I still wanted them."

What did you ask for a Christmas present from Santa?: The same cleats as my big brother.

What would you do on your last day on earth?: Fight my big brother.

What would you do if you received 100 million yen?: Place a bet on a single number in Roulette*.

What do you do on your days off?: Immerse myself in horror games or horror movies.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

An extraordinary player who boasts the top skills in Blue Lock

The monster reigning at the top of the new Blue Lock Ranking. Not only are his kicking, dribbling technique, and physical abilities outstanding, he's also able to read opponents' plays several moves ahead and manipulate them at will, making him the true ruler of the field. He's an extraordinary player with no flaws.

Is there a connection between his overbearing attitude and his brother?!

Rin is the younger brother of Itoshi Sae, who is selected as one of the "New Generation World 11". His goal is using "Blue Lock" to join Japanese National Team and surpass his older brother. His disrespectful attitude of dismissing Isagi and other players' play as "a tepid ball-kicking game**" seems to be deeply connected to his brother. When he finally surpasses his brother, will Rin's troubled mind*** be cleared?

A day at Blue Lock

"My bangs were falling over my right eye and it was starting to get annoying. I decided to cut my bangs and lifted it in front of the mirror. My face looked like my brother's, and I hated everything about it."

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

Rin's Ranking on "Best 3 of Everything: Blue Lock players voted each other"

1. Ranked #3 The Most Hardworking

2. Ranked #3 The Most Short-Tempered

3. Ranked #1 Worst at Communication

Rin's commentary: "...I have no intention of having tepid communication with you people"

4. Ranked #2 The Best at Study****

5. Ranked #1 "Doesn't have many friends"

Rin's commentary: "...Friends? It's just a low-level community for sharing tepid experiences."

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

Notes:

*In Roulette, betting on a single number is called a "straight up bet". It's the riskiest bet, but if you win the 35:1 payout will be very rewarding. (Highest-risk, Highest-reward).

**"A tepid ball-kicking game" is a reference to ch. 46. Official English publication translated it as "Mediocre playtime."

***The word in Japanese is 荒んだ心 "susanda kokoro" (lit.rough heart or hardened heart). It's an expression usually used to describe someone with prickly (rough) attitude because their mind is messed up or disturbed by something. For this context I'm using "troubled mind."

****The title/ranking is "Who Can Study Well". Basically, Rin is the #2 person who is very good at studying (benkyou 勉強).

On his profile, Rin referred to Sae as "兄ちゃん niichan". All the "big brother" mentioned by Rin here are originally "niichan" in Japanese.

Check Rin's updated profile from the second volume of Egoist Bible for more!

[thlayli-ra]

Trick! Stitches, from the whump prompt, for cmjf? (Dealers choice on giving/receiving)

So I'm kiiiiiiinda cheating a bit here. I've based this fic in @comediakaidanovsky body-swap au, where Drew's body has been possessed by MJF, so technically speaking it is CMJF, but also kinda Punkintyre too. Hope that's ok!

Trick - 'Stitches'

Characters - MJF, CM Punk, Drew McIntyre's body

Rating - Mature

Warnings - Injury description, mentions of rape (although none happens), blood

The first thing Max did when he got to the back was find an empty bathroom. The lightbulb above his head was small and dull but it shone bright like a low sun on a winter's evening, it's blazing rays blinding. He rushed to the mirror and Drew's face stared back at him, deep ocean blue eyes, swamped on every side by rich scarlet. The blood was everywhere, in his long hair, in his ears, covering every inch of skin on his face and shoulders and dripping down his chest and stomach. It soiled the white patches on his trunks and there were even pin-pricks of it on his knee pads and thighs too, however he wasn't sure if that was his blood, or Punk's.

Ohhh, Punk! Punk had bled first, and bled beautifully. Max had stood there, standing tall in Drew's size 13 boots, mesmerised at the sight. Betraying the wonder on his face with a hypnotic tilt of his head and signature lop-sided smirk. Punk caught him doing it, had glared back under those flat eyebrows as if Max had walked in on him in the shower. That messy mix of outrage and embarrassment and vulnerability. A sudden urge to cover himself up, reclaim his decency, all while keeping tabs on the six foot five behemoth stalking towards him with evil intentions.

Max had been in this position before. Multiple times now, even in his old body, back when he was little, pathetic Maxwell Jacob Friedman and Punk had been the one towering above him, all arrogant, self-serving and narcissistic. Back when Punk was on the other end of a chain tethering them together, on his knees with blood dribbling down his face. For a brief spell, Max had held all the power, the cockroach trapped in the palm of his hand and all he had to do was curl his fingers and squeeze.

And yet, both times, it was Punk who had emerged victorious. Like any cockroach, he was almost impossible to kill, and had forced Max back, beating him mercilessly until he was black and blue, tearing him open.

Looking at Drew's face in the mirror, Max ran a blunt finger along the gaping gash on his brow. The blinding light flickered away then slid back again. He blinked, trying to make sense of it, then placed his entire palm over the laceration. The light blotted out completely. Drew's eyes blinked and Max's eyes blinked and Drew looked up and Max looked up and both of them could see the grimy ceiling of the bathroom above their heads.

'Did it work?'

Max leapt back at the sudden sound of another voice. Spinning around he found Punk there in the bathroom with him. Blood-stained, bedraggled, breathing raspy and ragged, Punk stood with his booted feet apart and his tattooed arms at his side, fingers balled up into fists.

'What are you doing here?' Max spat, the rumble of Drew's voice pounding the echoing walls of the restroom. 'Get out!'

'You didn't answer me-'

'I said GET OUT!'

'No!' Punk took a step forward, unfazed by the angry behemoth in front of him. 'Not until I know if it's worked.'

'What are you talking about?' Max snarled.

'I know it's you, Max!'

Max's head went light, the blood draining out of him, quite literally. He staggered back like a man caught in the cop's flashlight digging a hole to bury his latest murder victim.

'H-how-?'

'You serious? You really think wearing Drew's face hid you away all this time?' Punk laughed scornfully, shaking his head. 'I mean nothing to Drew McIntyre and all of a sudden, he starts quoting my promos and dropping my name at every turn and calling me his "muse" and how I "complete him"? Calling me "Punky'"? You fucking kidding me, Max?'

Drew's face paled under the crimson mask, his hands began to tremble.

'I thought you got the hint back in Glasgow,' he went on, 'you know, when I gave you that receipt for what you did to me at Daily's Place.' Punk bent down, trying to catch Drew - or rather, Max's - eye. 'You remember that, Max?'

Of course he did! He remembered all of it. Every moment he shared the same ring, the same space, the same air as Punk, he remembered. But that moment in particular, when Punk looked at him with all the remorse of a neglectful father, when he opened his arms and welcomed Max in, dropping both the tough guy facade and his defences. The soft flesh free from its hard shell, ripe for Max to rip apart. How pretty did he look gasping for air as the collar choked him, how his blood had glittered in the light. Max had coloured his palm with it, smeared it across his own young, naive face embossed on his shirt. Symbolising a death, a rebirth, a baptism. (He kept that shirt in a special box next to their dog collars).

'What do you want, Punk?' Max growled, his voice so much lower and intimidating in his new body.

'What I want is for all this shit between us to be over,' Punk replied. 'It was mildly annoying in the beginning and I was able to ignore it but you kept coming for me and pushing me and you know what, that I could deal with. Even when you attacked me in my hometown, I could put my hands up and say that I deserved that - now we're even.'

Punk's face went dark, his voice turning into that deep rasp he reserved for when he was seething with unchecked wrath.

'But then you went and involved my family,' Punk advanced on Max who stood his ground, watching the older man draw closer. 'The moment my wife's name came out your filthy mouth, you crossed a line and I had no other choice than to put an end to this. For good.'

'How? How exactly are you going to "put an end" to me, Punky?' Max opened his impressive arms out wide, mocking Punk, goading him. 'You had your chance out there in Hell itself and you chickened out.'

That maddening smirk manifested on Punk's face, so smug that Max wanted to slap it right off him, but instead he watched as his adversary lifted his hazel eyes up and up.

'Did I?' Punk grinned, 'Look at that big, gaping hole I left in Drew's head. Can you see it Max? Can you see the light?'

Max's heart jerked in his chest, his breath catching in his throat. 'You... you-'

'Go towards it, Max,' Punk said, imitating some kind of holy messiah. 'Be free.'

'You bastard!' Max turned away, trying to fend off the fiery glare at the top of his vision.

But Punk refused to let up. 'You don't belong in there, Max.'

'You really expect me to go back to that sorry excuse of a body?' Max protested. 'Have you seen what Drew did to it? How that brainless idiot let them desecrate it with that shitty tattoo?'

'It's time, Max. You have to go.'

'Well, you know what, he can keep it. If Drew wants to clap his hands like a performing seal for Tony and all his fucking marks then that's fine by me. Hope he enjoys having an actual ass for once.'

'Max!'

'NO! I'm not leaving. You won't make me!'

Punk was close now, too close, boxing Max into the corner. 'It's not yours. You have to give it back.'

'NO!'

With both hands he shoved Punk on the chest, only realising his mistake when he saw the indignant look on the older man's face. How his brows lowered and the bridge of his nose scrunched, how his lips pulled back to bare his teeth.

Then he pounced!

Honing in on the gash on Max's forehead, he dug eight of his fingers in and pulled, wrenching the crevice apart.

Max squealed as the light gushed in all around him.

'GET OUT!' Punk bellowed into the open mouth of the wound. 'GET OUT, MAX, GET-'

Max grabbed Punk by the throat, effortlessly cutting off his air with one squeeze of his fist. Their gazes met for a brief moment before Max drove the older man back, slamming him into the counter. Punk let out a strangled cry, gasping as the pressure kept coming until he was bent right back over the counter's edge, his spine arched at an excruciating angle and his bare shoulders pressing into the cold metal of the sinks.

From on high, Max watched his muse struggle, watched his inked fingers clawing at Drew's meaty fist to try and dislodge them, watched his wide mouth open and close like a fish trying to gulp down air, watched his blood-stained face turn a deep, vicious red. Watched his eyes bulge, his pupils constrict.

Max watched it all, entranced. Punk always suffered so... perfectly. It was intoxicating.

Ever since that moment at Daily's Place when something switched in his brain, when Max had found himself standing at a crossroads with two options and he chose the latter, he had finally woken up and realised that he would never gain this man's respect.

But he could hold something even more precious.

'I get it now,' Max sneered directly in Punk's panic-stricken face. 'I know why you want me out of this body.' He leaned in close, drinking in the raspy chokes of Punk's failed breaths. 'You're afraid of me.'

All this strength, all this power! He controlled Punk so completely and with such little effort. He could do whatever he wanted with him. He could snap his neck with a twist of his wrist. Keep applying the pressure to his jugular and watch the light slowly dim from his eyes. He could fill the sink to the top and shove his face in, watch him writhe and flail as he slowly drowned, maybe yank his head back to hear him splutter before forcing him under again.

Or he could turn him around, rip those sorry excuses for trunks down and kick his ankles good and wide...

But Max did none of those things. Instead, he simply let Punk go and stepped back as the older man crumpled to the floor. Down on all fours like a dog, gasping in air and coughing up blood.

'You're fucking pathetic,' he uttered and stepped over his fallen idol to leave the bathroom.

Marching down the corridors, Max's brain raced with thoughts until he reached his destination. Settling himself into the chair, he turned to the medic and pointed at his brow. 'Stitch it up,' he demanded, and he sat serenely while the staples were driven in, the light dimming with each one until there was nothing left but darkness.

When he went to leave the Trainer's Room, he almost bumped into Punk who gaped up at his shiny staples with new-found horror. Max gave a huff of cruel laughter then walked away.

'It's not over yet, Punky,' he proclaimed in Drew's deep brogue. 'It's like I told you before - this only ends when I go to your funeral. And piss on your grave!'

[bluelocksource]

Yukimiya Kenyū’s trivia (source: twt & Egoist Bible 1 & 2).

"Move aside, I don't have time!"

☆ Character's colour: Red orange.

☆ Weapons:

Dribbling and gyro shoot. (EB1) Dribbling, gyro shot, instant vertical strike. (EB2)

☆ Nickname: ‘1on1 Strongest Prince’.

☆ Birthday: 28th April.

☆ Current age: 18 (3rd year of high school)

☆ Zodiac: Taurus.

☆ Birthplace: Miyazaki Prefecture.

☆ Family: Mother. Father. Himself.

☆ Current height: 184 cm.

☆ Dominant foot: Right foot.

☆ Visual acuity: Not good, need glasses.

☆ Blood type: O.

☆ Starts playing football: At age 7 (suggested by his mother).

☆ Personal 50M run record: 5.91 seconds.

☆ Team before joining BLUE LOCK: Soranin / Kūnin High School Soccer Club.

☆ Motto: "Give your all in a single moment."

☆ Favorite food: Blueberries. “They’re good for your eyes.”

☆ Disliked food: Garlic. “I feel like my vision is turning yellow.”

☆ Favorite animal: Penguins. "I think it’s fascinating how they waddle cutely on land but extremely fast when they swim."

☆ Favorite season: Spring. ”Because I like cherry blossoms.”

☆ Favorite football player: Edgar Davids.

☆ Favorite music: ‘Phoenix’ by SEKAI NO OWARI.

☆ Favorite manga: Oyasumi Punpun.

☆ Favorite movie: Evangelion “The older version. Asuka’s sky burial was excellent, wasn’t it?”

☆ Favorite TV show: FOOTxBRAIN (TV Tokyo).

☆ Favorite celebrity: Yo Yoshida. “There’s something pleasant about a cool woman.”

☆ Favorite brand: Oakley (goggle brand).

☆ Ideal type: Someone who smiles a lot and watches over him.

☆ Hobby: Modelling.

☆ Mushroom shoots vs Bamboo shoots: Mushroom. “Because of its cute shape.”

☆ What goes best with rice : Shirasu. "Pickled egg and green onion shirasu rice are delicious. Why don’t you try it?"

☆ What makes him happy: Warm support.

☆ What makes him upset: “Someone beat me in 1on1.”

☆ What he thinks his strength is: The most competitive person in the world, and strict with himself.

☆ What he thinks his weakness is: “I am too strict with myself and not interested in other people’s business.”

☆ Favorite/Best subject: Science, Japanese, P.E.

☆ Dislike/weak subject: Art. “Drawing makes my eyes tired.”

☆ What made him cry recently: “I won’t tell you. It’s embarrassing.”

☆ Usual sleeping time: 8 hours.

☆ What he usually ends up buying from convenience store: Hot eye mask. “To warm my eyes.”

☆ Place he washes first when taking a bath: His forehead hairlines.

☆ Fixation: With ephemeral things like cherry blossoms, sparklers, etc.

☆ Number of chocolates received from previous Valentine: “I didn’t count. I only ate the ones that arrived at my agency, there’s lots of them.”

☆ At what age he experiences first love: At age 10. “With my friend’s 16-year-old sister.”

☆ The first time he got confessed to: “My friend’s older sister kissed me on the forehead. Got embarrassed and ran away.”

☆ What will he do if received 100 million yen: “I don't know. I’m not interested in money.”

☆ At what age he stops receiving presents from Santa: At age 12. “Santa seems to be excluding the middle school students.”

☆ What was his last wish from Santa: Running glasses.

☆ How he spent his holiday: Reading. “I like learning about the lives of famous people.”

☆ What will he do during his last day on Earth: “Thanking my parents for bringing me into this world.”

☆ Favorite historical figure: "Minamoto no Yoshitsune. He lived with glory and tragedy, a fighter."

☆ If he hadn't encountered soccer, what will he be doing:  "That’s impossible. God will definitely make me meet soccer."

☆ If he could only take one thing to a deserted island, what would it be: Glasses. "I can't see anything without them!"

☆ If he had a time machine, would he go to the past or the future: The future. "I want to know if medicine will be able to cure any disease."

Last updated: 1/11/2024

note: i want to apologize in advance for any mistake made in the translation!

[jerriemofos]

Since its the January transfer window, i'll be talking about players that i would love to see at Arsenal!

Obviously, with the registered players being at the max, it's not realistic for new signings to come in this window. So these are players that i think will massively improve our squad in the summer especially if we do want to make it far in the uwcl and win the wsl!

Also, i would like to make another post about players that i will not be opposed to leaving in the summer to get better players in 🤔 but idt yall are ready for that conversation yet

1) Maëlle Lakrar

Amazing young defender, very attacking minded, fits in the playstyle of how jonas wants our defenders to be

Hard worker, loves to get interceptions in, 1v1 duels to win the ball back (i love defenders like this)

Tactically intelligent, able to get into good positions to intercept players and loves to progress the ball forward to quickly transition into attack

At 170cm, she handles aerial duels well and can be used as a threat in set pieces

Quite pacey and can handle speedy forwards when in transition

A lot of big clubs have already started enquiring about her as her contract ends in 2024, would be a shame if Arsenal lose her to a big rival.

2) Sakina Karchaoui

One of the best left-footed fullbacks in the world right now, very attacking minded defender, which again is how jonas loves our defenders to be

Only 160cm but what she lacks in height, she makes up for in work ethic, loves to be higher up the pitch to get involved in attacks but tracks back well to defend when caught in transition

Loves to get interceptions in, 1v1 duels to win the ball back, often both having a high rate of success

Same as Maëlle, her contract ends in 2024 and the opportunity to get a worldclass fullback on a free should not be missed. She will be a massive upgrade on Arsenal's left-back position.

3) Chiamaka Nnadozie

Goalkeepers are a harder one to judge because you cannot rely on stats, so this analysis is based on eye tests

At 23 years old, one of the best young goalkeepers in the world right now

180cm, an excellent height for a gk

Had an amazing WWC23 run as a starter for Nigeria

Currently, also having an amazing uwcl run with Paris FC

Very impressive aerial abilities for a young keeper (imo can be considered worldclass)

Great outside the box, able to play out from the back effectively

Although at times her decision making can be better, but with the right coaching, she's on her way to be a worldclass gk

Amazing gk for both Paric FC and Nigeria at only 23 years old, why not snatch her up? (if you can't beat her, buy her)

4) Angel Mukasa

21 years old, still needs more experience but at her age, shes phenomenal

No data on her height but from eye tests, probably around 170-180cm

Excellent shot-stopping

Great positioning, never caught out of focus

Her distribution is a stand out trait, amazing at her age

Great composure, doesn't make rash decisions in stress

In the uwcl against barca femení, if it weren't for her, FC Rosengård would've conceded more than 7 goals, she was phenomenal in that game

Not my choice for a starting keeper but would be an excellent 2nd keeper until she gains enough experience to be 1st choice

5) Kerolin Nicoli

NWSL MVP 2023, NWSL Best XI First Team 2023, Runner up for NWSL Golden Boot 2023 (what more can i say 🤷🏽‍♀️ she's a baller)

Lethal in the attacking third, loves 1v1 duels, excellent dribbling

Unselfish player, will pass to a teammate if needed but also loves taking shots at goal too

Right-footed player but is excellent at the left

Versatile player, can play on the left and right (as a winger or midfielder), up top but also as a CM

Not much else to say except that she will be lethal in Arsenal's left hand side. Just imagine Karchaoui, McCabe and Kerolin on our left 😮‍💨

Other players that i will love at Arsenal but too unrealistic:

Naomi Girma

Merle Frohms

Misa Rodriguez

Stina Johannes

Antônia Silva

Jule Brand

Morgan Weaver

Ary Borges

Anyways, if you've actually read the whole thing, thanks! I'm quite disappointed with the lack of movements in this window so i've decided to write it here.

Do you agree with this list? Any other players that you will like to see at Arsenal as well? Lemme know i would love to here you thoughts! (pls refrain from hateful words, if you don't like this list at all. criticism is fine but keep it civil)

[moriche]

Inktober Day Nineteen: Plump

This one was a very close contender for yesterday's "saddle" - but I ended up drawing it for "plump".

Next to him, the pack guar snorted, butting its head against his coat. Guar were remarkably hardy, able to survive a storm like this far easier than their riders, tough and stubborn like Cyrodilic donkeys. What I bring is an ancient sea. He turned around, angling his back to the worst of the wind for a moment of respite, fishing out a hackle-lo leaf from his pocket. Dark spit, stained with ash, dribbled from the guar’s mouth as it chewed, its smacking audible above the storm. From Fear in a Handful of Dust

India ink and red watercolour on paper, 10,5x14,8 cm

[drmarune]

Tag Faust

Birth day:1 may

Is :180 cm

Blood: A

Like:sweet,he’s siblings,be a tease

Dislike: to be left alone, not too know what’s going on

Personally :

Is a chill bored looking dude wo is smart and do he’s own thing is teasing act like a fox spirit to say at least he is not one is a gay disaster but talk like yami sukehiro

Back round :

Is the youngest dribbling of Nacht and Morgan he where close too both brother‘s but connected whit many people if he one thing have them social life he knew everyone I mean everyone

After Morgan’s death and Nacht running away he became the head of the Faust family and at one he became the head of a organization to get information ok it’s not the mafia more like year Moral grey one but he is a good one he fight other criminals in the underworld the get more powerful and rich

After Nacht whas back Tag gave Nacht the title of the Faust head because Tag didn’t like the title but he is salty at Nacht for leaving him

Magic:shadow magic

Fun facts

—Tag make puppet‘s and putting devil‘s in them too serve him

—Tag is known to have male love interest

—as a teen he get‘s rejected from Jack the Ripper he did cry a lot

—Tag Like to hanging out whit older woman wo are parents because he can good talk whit them and they give him many love plus he gifted many of them as thanks stuff to live

—Tag is a dyslexic person this is why he can’t talk right but reading is fine but he’s writing is shit

[florahydevt]

15 questions for 15 Friends

Tagged by @emery-matsushita-vt thank youu!! 💚

Are you named after anyone?

Well, not anyone, more like anything lol. My name is a play on the word formaldehyde.

When was the last time you cried?

Yesterday evening.

Do you have kids?

In this economy? No thank you ^-^

What sports do/have you played?

Basketball. But not like, for points against another team lol. Just physical therapy for my left arm. Dribbling and shooting hoops help to exercise my muscles.

Do you use sarcasm?

Quite a bit. But I try not to be too underhanded with it. If someone follows up with a genuine statement or question, I will verbally confirm I was being a little sarcastic shit lol.

What is the first thing you notice about people?

Tone of voice.

What's your eye color?

Green!!! (For now owo ooooh foreshadowing)

Scary movies or happy endings?

I love both :D

Any talents?

Nah. Except maybe writing. That's the one thing I feel like I'm okay at. Everything else is just a collection of underdeveloped skills, tbh. But I'm practicing art :3

Where were you born?

In a storm, built off the back of grief.

What are your hobbies?

Sleep. Speeping. Sleepy lil guy. Speepy wit soft blankie. S L E E P

Do you have any pets?

Yes!! Two lil kitties :3 Gizmo, the eldest cat, we've had for ten years. Nick, the newest addition, we've had for a year. Both were strays someone just dropped off on our street and my dad found (and if I knew who did it, they'd suffer some. serious. consequences :) )

How tall are you?

Had to use the Internet to figure this out, so let me know if I'm off: 172.72 cm. Or 5'8! (Another day, another reason to hate America trying to be not like the ✨OtHeR gIrLs✨ with measurements)

Favorite subject in school?

Language Arts. Then, everything changed when the honors kids burnout attacked.

Dream Job?

Funeral home owner. Not just a gimmick for my vtuber persona. I seriously, honestly, desperately want to own a funeral home. I have so many issues with the funeral industry (first and foremost that it's considered a fucking industry in the first place. This is the end of a life we're talking about, but sure. Profit profit profit. Fucking gag)

Aaaaanywho, let me stop before this turns into an essay :3

I TAG: @m1lk-ch3rry @torstenerikssonvt @dollymollynanika @amgianfar @arlydarkfire @vchuuberyl and anyone else who would like to join in!!! 💚

[marune2]

Tag Faust

Is 180 cm

Is 30 years old

Like’s: guy’s ‚teasin ‚candy, power play ‚hes siblings

Info: is a dribbling whit Nacht and Morgan is the youngest

Personality: is calm intelligent like to tease other is like a mafia boss

Back round info: he is the head of one of the underworld in clover he’s clan are called the bishops he helping the magic knights in exchange they egnor him Tag is salty for Nacht running away and let’s him know it

Hobby: prepare animals ‚ flirting ‚go in candy shop’s ‚ get information ‚ play whit children

[vincentspork]

Do you know anything about hackers?

Can you jam with the console crew in cyberspace? ever read neuromancer? ever experience the new wave? next wave? dream wave? vaporwave? seapunk? witch house? blog house? deep house? Chicago house? you like Chicago deep dish pizza? you like a stuffed crust? a thin crust? you a crust punk? a cyberpunk? cypherpunk? steampunk? you wear like a top hat? you watch top cat? you know choo choo, benny the bald, officer dribble? are you a cop? you gotta tell me if you're a cop. are you jump street? are you johnny depp? are you literally Edward scissorhands. you need hands to type, ed. what ls your words per minute strictly speaking? your excel knowledge? whats the last cms you used? where do you see yourself in 5 years? can you start on Monday? you wanna carpool? what kinda tunes are we listening to. new wave? next wave? dream wave? vaporwave? is that dream pop, that shu gaze, that nu gaze, is this chillwave? is this chill hip-hop beats 247 to study and relax to? is this a real slow version of an old electro song? is this shit like a wonderswan title song played backwards? you into them chiptunes, them showtunes, you seen hamilton have you SEEN Hamilton? you ever seen that episode of how i met your mother where lin manuel is rapping on a bus? you ever even been on a bus? do you support public transit? you ever hacked the subway from a payphone? you ever ever even seen a payphone? are you a phone freaker? you ever call freddy freaker? you ever played freddy farkers frontier pharmacist? you ever been to a pharmacist? you ever take an ove the counter seasonal allergy medicine? do you have seasonal affective disorder? Do you feel better in the spring? can you imagine a world without springs? you gotta case spring fever? you ever watch the 2005 movie fever pitch? Cus first you get the fever, then you get the flavor, then you get the fever for the flavor of Pringles. can you even eat potato chips? do you like chiptunes, showtunes, itunes, Napster, audiogalaxy? you ever downloaded an aiff file of the nightrider theme off of irc and then play that shit for 30 minutes? I didnt think so. I'LL handle the hacker stories

[batlleonafc]

And did she play well as CM? lol with the old coach she played in that hateful role and was almost useless. I think she should play as a 9, as a winger she doesn't know how to dribble the opponent

she didn't play bad. Yeah I would also love to see her as a 9

[holyiker-blog1]

Robin van Persie FUTTIES SBC Review and Guide

Overview:

FUTTIES in FC24 celebrates the best of the Ultimate Team (UT) cycle by introducing highly coveted pink cards. These cards often have boosted stats and unique attributes that make them highly desirable for players. The FUTTIES event includes various special player items, including FUTTIES Icons, Heroes, and FUTTIES Premium Chemistry cards.

The Robin van Persie FUTTIES SBC will be available in EA FC 24. You can redeem the FUTTIES Icon Card for the Dutch Striker by completing the Squad Building Challenge, available from 6 PM on July 28th. Completing this SBC not only unlocks van Persie’s card but also provides additional rewards to help with other SBCs or team strengthening.

SBC Requirements:

To unlock Robin van Persie's FUTTIES Icon card, the following Squad Building Challenges (SBCs) must be completed:

1.  Born Legend

a.  Exactly 11 Rare Bronze Players

2.  Rising Star

a.  Exactly 11 Rare Silver Players

3.  On a Loan

a.  Min. Team Rating: 80

4.  Gunners

a.  Min. 1 Player from Arsenal

b.  Min. 1 Player from any TOTS or TOTW

c.  Min. Team Rating: 83

5.  Clockwork Orange

a.  Min. 1 Player from Netherlands

b.  Min. Team Rating: 85

6.  League Legend

a.  Min. 1 Player from Premier League

b.  Min. Team Rating: 87

7.  88 Rated Squad

a.  Min. 1 Player from any TOTS or TOTW

b.  Min. Team Rating: 88

8.  89-Rated Squad

a.  Min. Team Rating: 89

this SBC is not a difficult SBC for most of gamers who have played FC24 frequently, but for those gamers who do not have enough resources, this SBC is not highly recommended.

Cost and Value Analysis:

The overall cost to complete the Robin van Persie FUTTIES SBC is approximately 235,000 coins.

Official Stats:

Here are the complete statistics for the special “Robin van Persie FUTTIES Icon” card:

● Overall Rating (OVR): 96

● Skill Moves: ★★★★

● Weak Foot: ★★★★★

Acceleration 96, sprint speed 95, combined with gold badge for fast dribbling, RVP Futties has a very fast speed. In terms of shooting, attack positioning 98, finishing 97, shot power 96, long shots 94, combined with finesse shot, Trivela, and power shot silver playstyle, overall shooting is good and basically sufficient. As for passing, RVP has vision 94, crossing 94, short passing 96, long passing 86, with playstyle+ for whipped crosser and pinged passing, ball distribution is very stable.

In terms of dribbling, 4-star skill moves, 187 cm height, high body type, Technical playstyle+, good control feeling, very agile. close ball control, quick turns while dribbling, overall motion speed is also good, dribbling slightly exceeds expectations.

This card has fast speed, good shooting and dribbling, overall performance is slightly better than expected, very suitable for playing on the wing or CF with defensive duties.

In-Game Performance:

Positives:

● Shooting: Van Persie excels in shooting with high ratings even without Playstyles+.

● Passing: His passing is brilliant, with excellent through balls and crossing abilities.

Negatives:

● Dribbling: Despite a 97 Dribbling stat, van Persie’s in-game performance feels lower, possibly due to his body type.

● Physicals: He struggles in physical battles, being easily dispossessed by defenders.

Solutions for Van Persie FUTTIES SBC

Here are some cost-effective solutions for completing the Robin Van Persie FUTTIES SBC. It's advisable to use players already in your club, particularly untradeable ones since you can't sell them for Coins.

At the time of publishing, the Van Persie FUTTIES SBC can be completed for approximately 220,000 Coins, though this price may fluctuate over time. Check out all the solutions to get Van Persie FUTTIES below!

Robin van Persie's FUTTIES is priced at about 235,000 coins on the FC24 transfer market, he is not cheap, requiring you to accumulate a large number of FC 24 coins. The LootBar's 5% BONUS event will continue and is unlimited. You will get an extra 5% of coins for your purchases. If you buy 1000K coins, you will receive 1050K coins in the game!

For a hassle-free experience in acquiring FIFA Coins for Xbox or PC, consider LootBar! This user-friendly platform ensures a seamless payment process for gaming enthusiasts globally.

Furthermore, LootBar presents an easy-to-use interface that is quick, straightforward, and visually appealing. Users can opt for their preferred login method for added convenience. So don't hesitate, hurry up and buy FC 24 Coins at Lootbar now！

Conclusion:

Robin van Persie FUTTIES - Cop or Flop?

● Verdict: Flop

● Reasoning: Despite strong shooting and passing, van Persie’s dribbling and physical limitations make him less competitive at this stage of the game. There are better options available, such as free players like Marcus Rashford from the season pass, which offer better value and performance.

[worldfootballrumours]

Fenerbahce hoping to sign Manchester City star Mateo Kovacic: A good option for Jose Mourinho?

#Fenerbahce #ManchesterCity #MCFC #MateoKovacic #Sport #Football #Transfers #FootballTransfers #Calciomercato #Fichajes

Fenerbahce has made its intentions clear in expressing interest in Manchester City midfielder Mateo Kovacic. Known for his technical proficiency and excellent dribbling abilities, Kovacic is a versatile midfielder capable of playing in various midfield positions. However, he is most effective as a ‘number 8’, excelling in the ‘Box to Box’ midfield roles. Standing at 177 cm, Mateo Kovacic has…

[paleyshelie]

The 85+ Player Pick: Another Chance for Glory

In addition to the 94+ player pick, the 85+ player pick offers another opportunity to EA FC 24 Coins bolster your squad. This pick often includes highly rated cards that can fill crucial gaps in your lineup.

Typical Results First Pick: Openda and another 85-rated player Outcome: Openda has been a frequent appearance in these picks, which can be both a blessing and a curse depending on your squad's needs.

Second Pick: Son, 89-rated Outcome: Son is a valuable card, offering versatility and high performance in various positions.

Third Pick: Robertson, 87-rated Outcome: While Robertson is a solid card, it wasn't the standout the player was hoping for.

Strategy and Value The 85+ player pick is less risky than the 94+ pick but can still provide valuable additions to your team. It's a good way to improve your squad depth without the higher costs associated with the 94+ pick.

FUTTIES Promotions: Transforming Bronze to Gold

The FUTTIES Bronze Glow Up Evolution is another exciting feature in EA Sports FC 24. This promotion allows players to take Bronze cards and significantly boost their overall ratings and stats, creating top-tier players out of lower-rated cards.

Key Players to Watch Alfie Devine Initial Rating: 64 Final Rating: 95 Positions: CM, CAM Stats After Evolution: 95 passing, 93 dribbling, 90 shooting, 82 pace

Devine becomes a creative powerhouse in the midfield, offering exceptional passing and dribbling skills.

Chemsdine Talbi Initial Rating: 64 Final Rating: 95 Positions: RM, RW Stats After Evolution: 97 pace, 96 dribbling, 89 passing, 5-star skill moves, 5-star weak foot

Talbi's incredible pace and dribbling make him a threat on the right flank, capable of breaking down defenses with ease.

Dane Scarlett Initial Rating: 63 Final Rating: 95 Position: ST Stats After Evolution: 98 pace, 93 shooting, 93 dribbling

Scarlett's speed and shooting prowess transform him into a lethal striker.

Adam Wharton Initial Rating: 63 Final Rating: 94 Position: CM Stats After Evolution: 91 passing, 90 dribbling, 85 shooting, 80 pace

Wharton's well-rounded stats make him a reliable option in the midfield, capable of contributing both offensively and defensively.

Luke Mbete Initial Rating: 64 Final Rating: 94 Position: CB Stats After Evolution: 95 defending, 90 physical, 85 pace

Mbete becomes a formidable presence in the defense, offering excellent defensive stats and physicality.

Impact on Gameplay The FUTTIES Bronze Glow Up Evolution allows players to experiment with new talents and build unique squads. It adds a layer of depth to team management, as players can take advantage of boosted stats to create competitive lineups.

Conclusion

EA Sports FC 24 continues to innovate and engage players with its dynamic promotions and player picks. The 94+ player pick and 85+ player pick provide exciting opportunities to enhance your Ultimate Team, while the FUTTIES Bronze Glow Up Evolution allows for creative team building.

While the player picks can be a gamble, the potential rewards make them worth considering. The FUTTIES promotions, on the other hand, offer a more strategic approach to improving your squad, giving Bronze players a chance to shine.

As with any aspect of Ultimate Team, success comes down to a combination of strategy, luck, and investment. Whether you're aiming for top-tier players through the 94+ pick or looking to build a solid foundation with the FUTTIES Evolution, EA Sports FC 24 offers a wealth of opportunities to create your dream team. EA Sports FC 24: 94+ Player Pick Packs and the FUTTIES Event

EA Sports FC 24 has captured the attention of football gaming enthusiasts worldwide with its exciting updates and features. Among the latest additions is the highly anticipated 94+ Player Pick Pack, which offers players a chance to enhance their Ultimate Teams with some of the best cards in the game. Coupled with the ongoing FUTTIES event, this new feature has brought a fresh wave of excitement and strategic possibilities for players. In this article, we'll explore the 94+ Player Pick Packs, the impact of FUTTIES, and the buy FC Coins players' experiences and reactions to these updates.

[frankiebirds]

remember when i shared an atla fic excerpt even though probably almost everyone follows me for cm content? haha. anyway here's something i'm sure nobody follows me for. original fiction time.

tw: physical assault, mild body horror

The memory, when it comes to me, is disjointed at best and incomprehensible at worst. But for the first time, it’s like I’m there. I think, ridiculously, that Mercia is going to be very annoying about this because it worked a little this time, even though she didn’t do anything. This was a waste of time; I could sit still and close my eyes at home. By myself. For free, too. I’m not on Mercia’s couch anymore. My back is pressed hard against the ground, and my shirt is soaked with sweat and rain. Gravel presses into every part of me it can reach. A particularly large and distracting chunk presses between my scapulae. Blood spurts from my nose and dribbles down over my ragged, bitten lips, mingling with spit and mucus, tears and rainwater. It’s a terrible sensation, this wetness that can’t decide if it wants to be cold, like the rain that’s drenched my hair or hot, like the blood that’s starting to drip down my neck to soak the collar of my shirt. Such a nice shirt, I mourn absurdly. Never get the stains out.

I swing my fist up hard, hear the satisfying impact of flesh against flesh, and bare my bloody teeth in triumph. I only have a moment to savour the victory, the wounded noise my attacker makes, before his fist crashes into my skull so hard I see red, then white, then nothing at all.

When I come back to myself, I’m shaking. I’ve slid most of the way off the couch, corpselike save for the frenetic movements of my limbs. My mouth tastes awful, something foul pooling behind my teeth, so I cup my hand below my chin and spit. Something solid hits my palm. I look down.

A tooth. One of my incisors is sitting in a small pool of blood at the centre of my palm. I don’t know if I’m stunned or truly unbothered, but my only reaction is to poke my tongue into the bloody hole in my gums. It hurts, sharp and real, and when I pull my tongue away, a string of bloody saliva drips from my tongue to my tooth and splatters on top of it like a raindrop.

I stare for a moment longer, and then a pair of white hands close around mine and squeeze once. I look up. Mercia is smiling at me as if her client didn’t just have a flashback that somehow culminated in them spitting out a tooth. She squeezes again and lets go.

“I think I need…a dentist,” I say.

Mercia looks perplexed. “What?”

I laugh, high and loud, like a hyena. “Because...”

I look back at my hand. One of the mints from the bowl on Mercia’s desk sits in the centre of my palm. There is no blood. When I run my tongue along the upper row of my teeth, they are all there.

Mercia smiles. “Shall we try again?”