#never going to sleep again i guess
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i spend my night losing my mind. i go to sleep. i wake up. THEY TRIED TO KILL TRUMP???? TAEMIN NEW ALBUM???? AAAAND WORLD TOUR???? BROTHER
#txt#never going to sleep again i guess#also losers haha guess who woke up next to my darling baby sweetheart . MEEEEE#and who got kissed. MEEEE#ignoring the horrors of coming back home today. HA HA
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still sick
drew myself another nurse to go with my nurse moon, this time a silly nurse sun!
once again couldn't decide between designs, so enjoy both!
#fnaf sun#fnaf dca#dca fandom#crab art#bright colours#digital art#i will never tire of drawing the DCA with dresses over their silly jester pants#i didn't intend for this to become a series#but i guess this will be a series#the next time i get sick#i'll draw nurse eclipse#and then i will be legally protected from being sick ever again#thats how it works right#anyways it's late#and the meds are gonna knock me out soon#i will go sleep
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5-STAR STRAY KIDS
#stray kids#skz#createskz#*m#*gfx#long post#chan#minho#changbin#hyunjin#jisung#felix#seungmin#jeongin#tears and a thumbs up i guess..#idk what to really say#how long did this take me...#12 hours.. i worked for p much 12 hours straight#im going the fuck to sleep#if this flops.. youll never hear from me again im so incredibly serious abt that#i hate this but at the same time im like lol . its ok right?#idk i just can never be satisfied with anything i make i know that much but fawk man#12 hrs and im disappointed in myself????#LIKE WHAT WAS THE POINT !!! FAWK YOU MISS LI !!!!!#whatever i just need to sleep#if theres typos.. spelling erros ill kms <3 so .#anyway... enjoy eye guess#i shouldve just slept but ehheawifejoiawefoija fuck#why am i so fawking nervous what the fawk
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*me immediately after going through a terrifying and traumatic experience* haha yeah I guess it was rough but I'm fine now like I'm totally chill. It was kinda funny actually if you think about it
#GUESS WHO GOT A PIERCING INFECTION SO BAD OVERNIGHT SHE HAD TO RUSH TO THE HOSPITAL#AND GET SURGERY TO REMOVE IT BC THE METAL WAS BURROWING ITSELF INSIDE HER LIP#yep that was meee :3#man. it sounds so silly now. like that probably shouldn't have made me panic nearly as much as it did#but you have to understand at the time it was terrifying#I noticed my lip was a bit swollen earlier in the night but I was like ok it's probably nothing serious#I put some ice on it hoping it would be back to normal after I got some sleep#then I woke up at like 5:30 AM with my lip super swollen and my lip piercing literally burying itself inside my flesh#I tried pushing it back out a bit and blood and pus started coming out so yk I started panicking#so I went upstairs and I asked my mom to drive me to the hospital#luckily we have free healthcare in brazil and the hospital was basically empty(this was on sunday)#but when I got there they told me the doctor wouldn't arrive until 8AM and it was like 6:45 at that point#so I REALLY started panicking 🫠 bc I could feel like the piercing kept burying itself more deeply like#I felt like the skin inside my lip was going to close around it and I was terrified bc I had no idea what to do#and I was scared it might make things worse#but all I could do was sit there and wait and so I started having a panic attack#luckily my mom was there with me the whole time so at least I didn't feel alone#and then I just. waited for it to end. and then tried to keep myself distracted until the doctor got there#I got treated by military doctors! sjdjcjck the army has been giving additional support for hospitals in my city#bc of the floods some health units are currently closed and demand got higher so they needed extra support there#so an army doctor performed my surgery(inside an army tent no less ajfjjfkf maybe not ideal but. functional)#he was so nice?? like probably the calmest most careful doctor I've ever been treated by#I still had a bit of a nervous breakdown again after the surgery but that was bc I'd never been through something like that before#I got anesthesia obvs but I still felt the tug when he cut into my skin to remove the piercing and did my stitches#so my mind started cooking up all these horrible scenarios of how everything could go wrong and I was gonna die#cried on the doctor's table. 👍🏻 awesome#but he and his assistant were super nice about it she even offered me a hug#but anyway in the end I finally calmed down and got some medication#now I'm all stitched up with my little bloated lip eating soup out of a straw 👍🏻 but I'm ALIVE and I'm just glad it's all over fjjvjkf#sleep.txt
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You know, when I kept getting asked "so you didn't ever have severe pains before now?" in the hospital and I kept replying "I have a high pain tolerance" I meant it. However, there is only so much pain my tiny 4'9" body can hold... (aka I am sweating and in agony bc I'm getting told to use LESS severe pain meds so I don't rely on them too much and it is AWFUL)
#moe talks a lot#i was shaking earlier and despite the fact i sound like im gonna cry#and the fact that my mom can pick out im about to cry from pain bc im trying to take less pain meds#LIKE MY MOM IS INSTRUCTING ME TO DO#shes like well why arent you taking any pain meds#BECAUSE THERE ARE TWO AVAILABLE OPTIONS AND ON A SIX HOUR TIMER#i cant take both at once or else what happens to me if i hurt before the six hours is up#i have to manage them in a way that allows me to benefit from both and being told im doing it wrong#after being told well its your fault it got so bad because you never complained about pain before#YEAH NO JOKE? REALLY? I NEVER DID? because everyone acts like im too young to feel that kinda pain#oh youre hurting? just wait until youre older#and its currently agony to breathe again but that i guess is also my fault bc im trying to use pain meds#holy moly i just want to not get dizzy standing up cause wow dang#sure would be nice if the multiple incisions in my stomach didnt THROB every time i sneezed or coughed or cleared my throat#but since i didnt use much pain meds before because i would be mocked for being too much of a baby its like#welp damn now i could really use some and im being called out for being too reliant#anyway time to sleep more because that means im not noticing my pain#im literally smaller than most children and so i do understand my body size makes people worried about the medication intake#but can i please just go a day without being asked how much im taking or when i last took it or if im gonna cry#anyway sorry for the excessive rant today never really had surgery or anything so this is brand spankin new suffering
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So Noah is openly being a zionist online... AGAIN. I'm seeing a lot of people wanting to leave the fandom- which I support, if you can drop this then you should. But if you're like me and it's not that simple, here are a couple rough tips that might help;
Pro-tip; instead of paying for Netflix and helping support genocide and the zionists in the cast/crew, cancel your subscription and send that money to charities that are bringing aid and resources into Gaza!
Pro-tip 2; buy fan content and nothing liscenced! Fan works are often better quality than the show- from drawings, to writing, to pins... it's worth the money and you aren't sending money to people openly supporting genocide and the murder of children!
Pro-tip 3; if you are going to continue taking part in fandom, like myself, do not do so in silence. Palestinians are being murdered and we can't pretend that it isn't happening simply because we have hyperfixations that we can't get rid of.
Pro-tip 4; join boycotts! Not only the monetary boycott of Netflix and Stranger Things, but- at least- the three main boycotts; McDonalds, Disney+ and Starbucks! There are many others, from Puma to Barclays to Booking.com to Pizza Hut to Burger King... None of these things are necessities and you can easily go without! Other options are probably cheaper and better quality too! It's a win-win!
Pro-tip 5; Go to protests if you can! Make your voice heard not only online but in person too! We have strength in numbers and we cannot lose the momentum we've barely started to build! Take direct action!
P.S. biggest fuck you to Noah Schnapp but also; Ross Duffer, Shawn Levy and Brett Gelman can suck the shit right out my ass <3
#stranger things#side not that I've lit never paid for netflix#unfortunately I've already paid for travel for that fucking stage show and I'm not willing to waste that money so :/#catch me taking photos of whatever merch I like and finding fan dupes though lmao#but again; fuck zionists. fuck them straight to the depths of whatever hell there is#and I'm going to sleep right after posting this so the potential fallout to this will be... uh... something#but I am kind of curious to see if anyone attacks me for continuing the way I am like I wasn't one of those who called noah out before this#but noah spreading isreali lies and zionist propaganda wasnt that big of deal until now I guess ����#anyways free palestine and pirate stranger things 🏴☠️🖖 goodnight
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figured id visualize something i said today
#the quote was in fact “get mischaed bitch” u would never guess the context in a million years#SORRY if u met me while i was in a Mood i am in fact not always behaving like a sweet old grandmother who bakes u cookies sorry#i am still very much a teenage boy obsessed w a fictional youtube rapper#i finished my hwwww sorta yippee#mischaposting#guess whos back. back again#literally 11 pm NO ONE is gonna see this#giggles#mischa bachinski#rtc#mischa mischa mischa#[he appears before me like beetlejuice]#also ive been listening to the pride and prejudice film soundtrack and it is beautiful ? i really wanna watch it now#anywaysssssssssssss#ride the cyclone#i dont think i tagged that one already#the mutualcule can do the restOMG MY BOOTLEG DONE UPLOADING TO DRIVE#if i wasnt so fucking exhausted id watch moulin rouge but alas.. i got 3 hours of sleep last night#thats why im probably going sleepy sleep now GOODNIGHT!!!#(probably)(so much emphasis on probably)#11:11 make a wish
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Some mild existential dread in the house today
#im just feeling reeeeally really drained#works taking a LOT out of me#like. it feels less intense day to day? or maybe im reacting less? but its still very much piling up#and im just feeling very...idk. like im still waiting for permission to live my life#except now the permission osnt coming from any one person its. having the money to docit#and the time and the energy#and i guess thats just what adult life is? waiting#and hoping#and along the way losing sight of what i even wanted in the first place because im so *tired*#idk. i definitely need a project of some kind but im struggling to settle on something and then organise it#i have stuff to do today anyway. alfie had a lil bit of emergency cash saved so i need to go shopping#and i need to tidy the kitchen and do some dishes#and have a bath and shave at some point#i also want to draw but again. struggling ti pick something and idk if ill have the executive function spare#AND i want to try and be more social and talk to folks but thats its own kind of difficult#part of me would like a disc server that just has all of my friends in it bc i find it easier to dip in and out of conversarions#but i imagine that would be weird for folks who dont know each other#idk. lot goin through my mind when all i really want is sleep#which also hasnt been...greeeeat lately#mainly because Alfie wakes me up in the mornings bc they dont like being alone but also have a very different sleep schedule to me#and can take multiple smaller naps over a day whereas i really need a solid 8 or so hours or i just. dont fully switch on#but theyre also struggling atm (mentally and also they got an injury at work AND seperately broke their foot ffs)#so they need me more and its just#this never ending cycle of SOMETHING needs my attention#and its fucking exhausting asfghfkd#but!!! we keep goin!!!!! been applying for a bunch of jobs and havent heard anything positive yet but. we keep tryin huh
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For any of my mutuals, please DM me if there’s an OC of mine you want. Just in case something happens to me.
#I have to wait until after the 19th#then I can finally be done#the 19th of this month is my friend’s birthday and I intend to stick around for that#I was already planning but I can’t do this anymore so I moved the date closer#there’s gonna be so much I’ll miss but it’ll be okay#i guess it’s convenient I never really had a bucket list except to go to CalArts#it’s sad I won’t be doing that ig#I’m sorry to you all for even making this public#I guess I thought I needed to tell you guys so if I never post again you know why#I need to tell some of my online friends my address tho so they can come and take stuff from my room#but I’m worried they’ll call an ambulance#I’m gonna miss this all#or I guess I won’t#it’ll be like sleeping from what I’ve read#tw sui ideation#suic1de#tw suicide#tw sui talk#I’m tryna add as many warnings as I can for you guys#tw death
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#ok ramble time#classic this feels too intimate to share with anyone so everyone gets it#essentially last week there was a suicide on campus#he was not one of my students or in our department#I'm pretty removed from it#ans i really didn't think it affected me#but i guess it has#bc like i thought i was over#✨this✨#Like ok i have had active plans in the past#one of those this is how this is when this is where#just waiting for the final straw#but i clearly never did#and that plan would no longer work due to changes in circumstances and living arrangements etc#which is honestly probably for the best#bc i refuse to make a new one bc i know i do not want to go there#but im just TIRED and ANXIOUS#its not even the depression its the anxiety of living#i stay up until 3-4 in the morning bc i cant stand the idea of going to sleep#and i secretly hope each sleep will be my last#bc im not going to DO anything bc that would not be it#too many ppl care about me (unfortunately)#and then ive stopped eating (again)#and it's like idek if its bc i dont want to or bc i forget#its like i see myself self destructing but cant make myself stop#and I have not done anything physically stupid in quite a long time but ive started biting to stim#and i dont even know im doing it half the time it just helps#and skin picking. which none or this is the same as true s/h but it does scare me to a degree bc i dont mean to i just do it#anyway i don't expect anyone to read all of this i just had to get it out ot my head
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SEX VALUES
"I'm not gonna do... that for just anyone. Just... look, just forget I said anything, okay? Can we change the subject?"
Tagged by: @twcfaces (mwah ♡♡) Tagging: If you haven't done this yet, YOU!
#🌈 || dashboard games#🌈 || memes#Thank you so much for the tag halekulani!#I appreciated this a lot bc I honestly never did this for Khare#She's veeeery avoidant about ANYTHING to do with sex and doubly more so since getting mutated#Eyyy 50/50 club right here!#Khare honestly doesn't mind either gender both men and women can be attractive#Dom? Submissive? Switch? Whatever makes her partner happy I guess#The trick to getting with her... is that you don't haha#She can find people attractive but that's as far as her urges go#Any drive got straight up nuked after those DNA changes aafsd#I'm actually surprised sex drive got that high tbh that is probably has high as it gets EVER#The most exciting part about going to bed with someone is going to sleep and that's it - Khare#Khare why are you such a fucking 😐#Anyways good luck to anybody able to look past those extra eyes :')#OH YEAH hi guys hope you're all doing well and are having a lovely weekend!#My ass got slammed with overtime again so only 1 day off in... 2 weeks#I'm so tired bsdsds
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tag vent
#i have to move back to my hometown due to a mistake. a misunderstanding. and being too trusting in others ideas#and my boyfriend is moving an hour away as well. neither of us have been able to get a car or license yet due to money and i dont know when#we can see eachother again after we both move. since we started dating weve been sleeping in the same bed because we were/are roommates#just being gone for the weekend in my hometown is hard because i cant stand to be here but its worse because hes not in my bed every night#ive grown so used to falling alseep in his arms that i dont know what to do at night. i dont feel safe without his arms holding me#ive never felt safe where ive lived before. ive never felt safe in a relationship. ive never felt loved for who i am. that was until him.#now i feel safe in our home. i feel safe in our relationship. i feel loved for who i am. and now we have to be so far apart.#ive done long distance before but this is going to hurt so much my cat loves him she is super cautious and scared around new people but#she loved him since the start. not to mention shes my esa so that really mattered to me. he wants to move with me but it isnt happening#he got definite housing an hour away for super cheap in a town where he knows everyone and i have possible in a town where im surrounded by#people i know but am terrified of. im scared to move back here but have no choice. unless i make that terrifying choice of going with him.#the apartment he is getting is a two bedroom. id only have a studio. hes offered for me to come but im scared to move that far away again#i want to be with him but im scared to move to a whole new town with him. i know hes an amazing guy but we'd be moving away from my friends#and family. i already have to move away from all my friends if i go back to my hometown but this would be a different story.#moving to a whole new town with a guy that i only started dating 2 months ago? like yes. i lived with him previously and knew him for longer#than we dated but im still scared. i think rightfully so. but still.#but there are some pros to moving with him. hometown has no music scene and his town does and thats really important to me.#we'd also be close to his family. but farther from mine. hed be around friends and id have none no matter where i go.#idk im just rambling but i really needed to vent. i lost my best friend recently to the point of them siding with strangers almost and they#helped them break and enter into the house to intimidate me and bf and then a few days later came with cops after saying repeatedly that#they were an anarchist and acab but only when they dont use them apparently. because i guess morals/values only matter when its convenient#im so tired though but i cant sleep so i might write some cringe poetry and try to chill out before going on a late night/early morning walk#tag vent#vent in tags
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I ate half a serving of some really really good pesto pasta in the evening. Just rocketed out of bed at 3 AM after an hour or so of intense rounds of pain and I’m not going to go into details but holy shit I wish I never ate more than a couple bites of it and just brought a smoothie or soup to the restaraunt instead this is AWFUL. Literally hauled myself into the bathtub with warm water just to breathe.
#will I take a sick day at work#probably not because I really need to hear those meeting discussions this week#will I have a carousel of unpredictable symptoms the rest of the night? possibly#oh my god. oh my god.#it was the best pesto pasta I ever had. it’s becoming the worst pesto pasta I’ve ever had. I am so sad#me: DO I HAVE FOOD POISONING????#also me: has a known GI condition that is the much more Occam’s razor answer to what caused this situation#and yet somehow still me: DO I SUDDENLY HAVE LACTOSE INTOLERANCE???#girl. it’s 4 am. meditate yourself to fucking chill in this bathtub.#then see if you can go back to sleep#anyway. lessons are being learned#I don’t have any idea what happened but it was sooooooooooo rich and I’m guessing it was too much fat or too much fiber or both#brb about to look up almond and pesto sauce nutrition labels#health#future me I hope this never happens to you again#gastroparesis#if I’m taking a warm bath in the middle of my worst POTS flare since 2017-2018#you know how bad I must feel to make that worth it lol
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on the ground sobbing in a puddle of actual tears my face feels like a wet towel im going to hyperventilate (i reread my own writing from yesterday)
#guess who was the main character#you’ll never guess (he’s been the main character in 90% of my recent works)#it’s cross sans#what type of fic it was is up to you.#fluff? angst? hurt comfort? hurt no comfort? something else? youll never know#my cat’s belly just made a sound that reminded me of the windows startup noise#i need to go to sleep before i become convinced i live in a simulation and my cats are robots (again)
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i love when games have the accesibility option of skipping certain difficult mechanics. easy modes, stress-free story modes, eliminating real-time needs or letting you focus on story rather than strategy, i think it's fantastic that the developers care enough to offer those options to people who might not be that good at that part of the game but still want to enjoy the experience.
mind you, i will never use them and you cannot make me use them, no matter how much i cry and complain about the game being too stressful or hard. but, yknow, glad to know they exist.
#that one game that let you get rid of the hunger-sleep-real time need mechanics so you could focus on the fun stuff#and even as a real time needs hater i would NOT use that (i never played again sorRY)#but yeah love that. will never touch it sorry too much ego i guess fkfjfjfk.#suzerain grabbing my hand gently: you can just skip the war mechanic yknow.#you can let the computer deal with it while you read and do your usual thing do you want that?#me crying throwing up but not letting go of my toy tanks: NO#according to jules
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Okay i have yet to see a post about this that isnt filled with ppl being Annoying as Fuck on it, but,
theyve found wreckage of the submersible, it imploded (thank god, thats better than a drawn out suffocation over the course of several days, implosion means it was pretty much instantaneous) and the us navy have revealed they heard a weird sound on sunday from about where communication with the sub was lost, that was probably the sound of the implosion, [implied that they didnt say anything cos they didnt want to jump to conclusions without evidence of a wreckage, if there was a chance they were still alive.] no idea what the banging sounds were.
I do hope rescue efforts are extended to the migrants off the coast of greece, and am angry and horrified at their mistreatment, and that the media clearly cares less for their fates than that of the billionaires on the sub.
also, while i have you here,
The difference between a submersible and a submarine is not that one is safer. The titan was a submersible that was unsafe, but that is not because it was a submersible.
A submarine (or sub) is a watercraft capable of independent operation underwater.
A submersible is a watercraft designed to operate underwater, usually supported by a nearby surface vessel, platform, shore team or sometimes a larger submarine.
submarines generally dont go as deep as our deepest submersibles, but some can be down there for months at a time bc it is like. a self sufficient Ship. not all submersibles can go crazy deep, but to my knowledge, the only crewed vessels that can go that deep, are submersibles. (Alvin, deepsea challenger, limiting factor, trieste, fendouzhe or "striver").
#toy txt post#titan submersible#if ppl start being annoying on this post. ill turn off reblogs and block all of you. make your own post.#reblog the other ones where people are already being annoying#yes i hate billionaires. but im glad it was a quick death. it was a horrific situation. hope those migrants are given support and help.#i hope oceangate is fined to hell and back and bankrupted and never gets to put anyone in any sort of vehicle ever again#especially not in the ocean. im a little glad that ceo is dead in his own stupid sub im just frustrated he was able to take other ppl with#him. the fact that he was able to operate that unregulated non safety standard meeting ass vehicle and charge people money to ride in it is#fucking insane and unconcioable however you spell that#and now i need to go shower real quick and try to get like. a little over 3hrs of sleep. which will suck but i did accidentally nap for#like? 2 hrs already so it doesnt suck as bad as it could. goodnight please dont be stupid on this post please please please#if you have a hot take on the situation im begging you to hot take it Some Where Else! thank you! good bye#im not gonna bother linking shit feel free to fact check just fuckin. google titan submersible. James Cameron is tossing his 2 cents in now#saw 2 separate articles on that already. thats fine i guess he has been down there in safer vehicles so i guess he can shit talk how unsafe#it is. anyway. saw someone in the comments of a post say it was a submersible bc it was too unsafe to be a submarine and i wanted to start#screaming. thats not what those fucking words mean! at all! god!#irl death#idk what else to tag#behave. bye
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