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#we can see eachother again after we both move. since we started dating weve been sleeping in the same bed because we were/are roommates
genekies · 2 months
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tag vent
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#i have to move back to my hometown due to a mistake. a misunderstanding. and being too trusting in others ideas#and my boyfriend is moving an hour away as well. neither of us have been able to get a car or license yet due to money and i dont know when#we can see eachother again after we both move. since we started dating weve been sleeping in the same bed because we were/are roommates#just being gone for the weekend in my hometown is hard because i cant stand to be here but its worse because hes not in my bed every night#ive grown so used to falling alseep in his arms that i dont know what to do at night. i dont feel safe without his arms holding me#ive never felt safe where ive lived before. ive never felt safe in a relationship. ive never felt loved for who i am. that was until him.#now i feel safe in our home. i feel safe in our relationship. i feel loved for who i am. and now we have to be so far apart.#ive done long distance before but this is going to hurt so much my cat loves him she is super cautious and scared around new people but#she loved him since the start. not to mention shes my esa so that really mattered to me. he wants to move with me but it isnt happening#he got definite housing an hour away for super cheap in a town where he knows everyone and i have possible in a town where im surrounded by#people i know but am terrified of. im scared to move back here but have no choice. unless i make that terrifying choice of going with him.#the apartment he is getting is a two bedroom. id only have a studio. hes offered for me to come but im scared to move that far away again#i want to be with him but im scared to move to a whole new town with him. i know hes an amazing guy but we'd be moving away from my friends#and family. i already have to move away from all my friends if i go back to my hometown but this would be a different story.#moving to a whole new town with a guy that i only started dating 2 months ago? like yes. i lived with him previously and knew him for longer#than we dated but im still scared. i think rightfully so. but still.#but there are some pros to moving with him. hometown has no music scene and his town does and thats really important to me.#we'd also be close to his family. but farther from mine. hed be around friends and id have none no matter where i go.#idk im just rambling but i really needed to vent. i lost my best friend recently to the point of them siding with strangers almost and they#helped them break and enter into the house to intimidate me and bf and then a few days later came with cops after saying repeatedly that#they were an anarchist and acab but only when they dont use them apparently. because i guess morals/values only matter when its convenient#im so tired though but i cant sleep so i might write some cringe poetry and try to chill out before going on a late night/early morning walk#tag vent#vent in tags
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Paris - Ronnie/Patty
Ronnie smiled as he felt Pattys slim hand slide into slightly larger ones. He could feel the slight calluses over the smaller palm and fingers caused by years of playing guitar, the small cuts that were created the week before while they were cooking vegan tacos. The metal of the hair tie that Patty had on his wrist felt cold against Ronnies warm skin. He felt the butterflies erupt in his stomach, a feeling that he knew hed never get bored of. He looked across at the younger male and felt his smile go bigger.
Pattys black hair was swept widely across his forehead, even with his beanie on. The small black wisps of hair that escaped the rest of the dark hair rested just above his eyes, no matter how many times the younger had pushed them out of the way, and slightly smudged his eyeliner in an adorable way. Ronnie could see the small imperfections in his face, how Pattys lips were ever so slightly chapped from the breeze and the end of his nose that was slightly red from being in the cold for too long. There were small goosebumps along his neck and across the bottoms of his arms that weren't covered by the deep black denim jacket he wore, the one that once belonged to Ronnie but Patty had taken it for himself.
It had been over 4 years since they had first kissed, on the last day of warped tour. When Ronnie, despite his nerves, walked over to the brit and gently leaned in and left a faint kiss on his lips. But then Patty had to leave and fly back to the UK, leaving both parties crushed. However after two years of them talking a lot over facetime and a lot of texting, they decided to give long distance a go and havent looked back since. Then the opportunity for Ronnie to join first as a touring member and then a full time member of the band arised and the couple jumped at the chance to be able to spend more time together.
Now the couple were on their third tour of the year, supporting for Enter Shikari through the European dates. The band had a free day in Paris due to not playing the show that night and decided to go out and explore the city for a few hours, or at least thats what Patty thinks.
After weeks of planning, Ronnie struggling to find the right ring and moment to do it, he planned to do it with the eiffel tower in the background and the rest of the band around them. Ben had the simple black ring in his jacket pocket waiting for the moment that Ronnie asks for it.
Ronnie could feel himself start to slightly shake with nerves, the sick feeling in his stomach getting worse. His legs felt like jelly as he forced himself to carry on walking to the area where he decided to propose. He felt the slight tap on his back and then the ring box be forced into his hand, the soft velvet feeling like fire.
He grasped Pattys hand tighter in his and started to slow down, being in direct shot of the powerful tower behind them, before grinding to a hault. He took a deep breath and looked up, seeing Pattys eyes sparkling in the city lights looking confused and inquisitive as to why they stopped. Ronnie looked past him to see the knowing smiles on everyone's faces and took another deep breath as he held both of Pattys hands in his.
"Patrick Thomas Walters" he said with a small chuckle, the lead singers full name always making him laugh "you have made me one of the happiest guys alive. Everyday when I wake up next to you if that in a hotel room or our bed or being crammed into one of the tiny bunks on the bus, I cant help but smile and everything feels better. I rememeber the first time I saw you, when you was walking through the traffic lot in California and you had your brown floppy hair and your big smile and I couldnt get you out of my head. It took me till the last day to finally work up the courage to finally come and kiss you, it was the best decision of my life. " Ronnie could feel the tears starting to build up in his eyes " but then you had to go home to england and we lost contact, it was the worst moment of my life. Until 3 months later I had a message from you on twitter and we started talking again. After countless hours on FaceTime to eachother and late night phone calls I fell in love with you and I fell hard. When Okay. Came out I remember sitting on FaceTime to you while you were in floods of tears while reading all the tweets of people getting the album and I felt so proud. " He felt Patty grip is hands tighter as small tears started to fall from his eyes. "After you asked me to move to brighton with you for our two year anniversary Id never felt like it before. I remember when we walked into the pet shop and got Kirk together, then later got Ponyo and Sosuke and I can never forget the smile you had when we got them. One of the worst feelings Ive ever had is when I got that call saying that you had a blood clot in your arm and how you was trying to stop surgeons operating on you so you perform in London. When I sat there and injected enoxaparin into your arm, id never felt so annoyed at a person before. " Ronnie let go of Pattys hand to wipe the tears that were falling down both of their faces. "But as soon as I saw you walk out on the stage I knew it was the right decision, youre at home on stage. Then I had the chance to come on tour with you and im so glad I did. Getting to see you every night play stages and hear people scream your lyrics back at you was an experience that I never understood, till I was stood next to you on that stage. We've had our ups and our downs, theres no disputing that. Weve fought and weve argued, but its always been over silly stuff. When you asked me to officially join the band, I cried into your shoulder for an hour until saying yes. Ive never been accepted into a family with such open arms and I cant believe that the floppy haired guy in a California parking lot could mean so much to me. I dont know what the future has in store for us but I know I want to spend my future with you. I want to have a cute house together in brighton and maybe have kids together. " Ronnie took a deep breath before getting the ring out of his pocket,opening the box and getting down on one knee. "I want to be with you, you are my happy space. You make me feel like I belong and I want this feeling to last forever. So Patrick Thomas Walters would you do me the honour of being my husband?"
Tears were pouring out of Pattys eyes, eyeliner slightly smudged from the tears and the biggest smile Ronnie had ever seen. He fell to his knees wrapped his shaking arms around Ronnies shoulders and just kept nodding, not able to speak a word. Ronnie laughed into his now Fiancees shoulder and slowly slid the ring onto his finger before pulling them both up and pulling him into a kiss.
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