#more tags later at work soz

[twiinarmageddonss]

the fuck yall know about clownin

[vaaters]

more flora shit soz

sorry to clog up the floraverse tag again but im also losing my mind cus like

yall....

if you dont know, i had an ex that turned out to be a pedophile and had groomed me since i was 15 up until i was 22 when i fully figured out the magnitude of the situation.

this dude had multiple people in floraverse. and was dating at least one or two of them. you know, while maintaining a monogamous relationship with me since i was 17, and was openly sexual towards me, graphically, since i was 15. i dont want to talk about the deets with that though. anyway.

i remember talking about this kind of stuff to them before i figured out i was being groomed and nobody batted an eye(a few friends in a group chat even tried to convince me that i should stay with him! ha! and that it was just my anxiety, when i was stating how miserable i felt!)

but when i found out i might have been used and groomed, i also found out he was cheating on me and i broke up with him. and glip suddenly asked me "hey did he do anything to you?" and i said everything that had happened before the cheating came out was consensual. and it was, i thought. but i was a child for most of that, i couldnt actually consent. but nobody actually cared.

later on i tried to fix shit with him before i fully realized the scariness of the situation and that didnt work so shortly after i fully realized i was straight up groomed for years and asked them to kindly ban the people involved. flora staff response was BASICALLY, to say they deserve to have a space there just as much as i do because the only "crime" they committed in the actual server at the time was to pressure me to try to be in a polyamorous relationship with him and his affair partners, and because it was "personal beef" or whatever, they refused to do anything about it.

i think thats another reason i started realizing floraverse was full of shit, not just glip themself. full offense. fuck you guys for keeping me in an unsafe environment for that long of a time knowing i was being abused. i talked about shit so much. i dont understand why you couldnt have banned him or his stupid affair partners. they were in on it too. they all said they knew about me. i was the only one that didnt know.

[saint-nevermore]

Begging for more ezekiel info she's so perfect

good timing cuz ive been fleshing her out lately! i will simply infodump so her current story is somewhere in her tag:

Ezekiel Gildd-hide is a Satyrian bounty hunter specialising in working with arcane users and magical anomalies. not every bounty hunting agency runs the same, but the one she's working with functions pretty passively, in that most bounties are treated as information seeking. she meets Harbeest to doublecheck that he is indeed a normal guy and not a murder beast, for example. originally, there was some lore about a dead family situation, but that's since been scrapped (her toyhouse isnt up to date soz). not sure what her family deal is yet.

she was in over her head a bit when she chased up a bounty for a suspected lich (NOT Pietre), and the encounter quickly becomes violent. Zeke isn't all that powerful an arcane user herself, instead usually deflecting and parrying attacks, but trying to parry an arcane lightning attack fails, and she's struck. when hit, she absorbs the source of the Lich's elemental power; a lightning elemental sprite. the Lich flees, and Ezekiel gets her injuries from this. her scars arent accurate to real lightning scars because Fantasy - AND the parry would've caused a small explosion alongside being struck by lightning. no good.

sidenote: this is very old lore ive talked about maybe twice: Elemental Sprites are a species of Fae who can bond with material beings, and in doing so, grant the person the fluent ability to channel their element, and also giving the Sprite self awareness and a will, usually based on the person's personality. the elemental she absorbs specifically jumped ship to her to get away from its original owner, and in doing so, is the only thing keeping her from succumbing to her injuries. its a very old one, and would respect her wishes to leave, if it werent for the fact its keeping her alive. so shes stuck with an Elemental, and some bonus stakes: her bounty agency strictly bans any pact with fae, and this technically counts, so she has to keep it under wraps, and has a complex about feeling stupid enough to make such a dumb mistake.

in order to stay on the team after this, she has to get a partner for any missions, at least temporarily. it becomes her duty to either ask to partner up with a coworker or hire a new hunter, and she goes with the latter. the mandatory partner thing isnt a punishment or anything, its somewhere between legitimate concern and fantasy ableism, so she does it. at this point in time, Pietre's little task to keep him in a good state of mind is to find an actual job to keep him busy, and Harbeest suggests the bounty hunter ad. so she picks him because he is a very very very good magic user, not knowing at all that hes a Lich. As you can imagine, this causes issues later.

Zeke uses a crossbow, carrying a single bolt at a time. if she thinks an encounter may turn violent or if a bounty shes chasing is a confirmed hostile, she inscribes the name on the bolt. if its not needed, the bolt is just disposed of. after bonding with the sprite, she can command that the bolts cause arcane lightning damage upon hitting a target, pretty much being a smiting weapon. her close range weapons are two daggers, though these are rarely used after the lightning lich encounter, with her preferring to keep a distance. she also knows an arsenal of restraint and disarming spells, alongside having charged wands with the same spells. in a battle with Zeke, her getting her crossbow out is a bad sign, because while she isnt anything special magically, she is an incredible marksman.

for personality, Zeke is very professional, though she isn't too cold or stoic, needing a certain level of talkability in her line of work. shes a socialite in the sense she prefers to oversee other people quietly as opposed to actually being engaged in conversation. she has a really hard time shifting out of work-brain and can be overly formal. she's stubborn and kind ofhot-headed. shes pretty subdued by the time she meets Pietre, with the encounter that fucked her up now being a much more recent event in her lore, but kind of learns to loosen up and have more fun again because of him. But the Lich reveal doesnt go awesome

bonus note: Pietre is terrified of lightning and fire! his girlfriend is so scary !!!

[anditendshowyoudexpect]

not tagging anyone

but please feel free to join in 

ty for tagging me @cafedeagua​

3 ships: you have got to be kidding me. okay, the write-your-own-fic level of intense: Vicbourne, Eushin, Dongan (soz Tedbecca you gotta earn it). if you know, you know.

First ever ship: i don't actually remember. could be Alucard and Integra. could be Snape and Hermione. could be Hornblower and Bush. could be Buffy and Giles. could be Peter Grant and Thomas Nightingale. could be Daisy and Coulson. (trying to sneak in more ships, yes, sorry not sorry). fine, it was probably Mulder and Scully Last song: the last song i haven't been able to get out of my head is Spring Breeze by Lee Moon Sae bombaramcheorom saaaaraaaaang Last movie: del Toro's Pinocchio Currently reading: night reading (always kindle and audio) - The Secret Commonwealth by Philip Pullman (regretting this choice tbh, should have waited until the third book in the trilogy comes out), day reading (always paper) - A Zoo in Winter by Jiro Taniguchi Currently watching: nothing apart from a few ongoing kdramas (Work Later, Drink Now, Unlock My Boss, Red Balloon), this is the first time in a while when i go for reading instead of watching whenever i have spare time. figured if i want to read all these books i have amassed before i die, gotta start at some point. Currently consuming: water, only water this time of day. well, night. Currently craving: nothing

[englishmagic]

I posted 18,823 times in 2022

That's 8,704 more posts than 2021!

192 posts created (1%)

18,631 posts reblogged (99%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@daughter-of-sapph0

@buggerit-millenniumhandandshrimp

@littlebluecaboose

@elytrians

@floragraysteel

I tagged 2,937 of my posts in 2022

#soz life - 54 posts

#a starstruck odyssey - 51 posts

#liveblog - 41 posts

#wwdits - 34 posts

#episode 8 - 22 posts

#we’re doing a liveblog boys - 20 posts

#good cows - 19 posts

#ofmd - 17 posts

#same - 15 posts

#unreality - 14 posts

Longest Tag: 139 characters

#looks like someone needs to contemplate their mortality more frequently and become comfortable with the inevitability of death and decay 🤷

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

Yes, the idea of Izzy having to be the one to officiate a Blackbonnet wedding is hilarious. But if we go by the orig Revenge crew I think Buttons is Stede’s first mate, and like

You CANNOT tell me that wedding wouldn’t be the absolute tits.

61 notes - Posted April 12, 2022

#4

Mina starts her letter with “sorry for the late reply”, showing nothing has changed about emails since the 1890s.

65 notes - Posted May 9, 2022

#3

The Gunner Channel just fucking kidnaps things they like all over the place

Zortch

Aurora

An attempt with Plug

But also oh my god Plug what the fuck is this guyyyyy I love him

65 notes - Posted March 3, 2022

#2

Ronance concept:

Robin and Nancy have to do some sort of Really Important Research and pull an all nighter in one of their bedrooms. Robin is snoring while Nancy’s only just gotten started. She huffs but doesn’t wake her up, and a few hours later she’s passed out, exhausted.

Cue the next morning, Robin wakes up to find a pretty girl is using her as a pillow, and panics because holy fuck she is so close she is so pretty is this normal this is not normal is this normal do straight girls do this maybe this is a straight girl thing that straight girls do all the time I am NOT STRAIGHT oh my god her head is directly on top of my heart which is beating out of my chest I need to calm down or it’s going to wake her up fuck fuck fuck

After a while Nance wakes up, they get back to their work, go about their days, and to the outside world Nancy seems fine, but she can’t help feeling like she’s got “I SLEPT ON A BOOB AND I LIKED IT” written on her forehead in bright red flashing letters.

88 notes - Posted June 4, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

When the rumour gets back to the Revenge that Stede was killed by a ‘jungle cat’ Frenchie’s gonna be like

Told you so

109 notes - Posted April 18, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[theasstour]

© 2021 - 2022 / AU / SPORTS / ON-GOING Fem!Reader x Harry     -     Total word count: 30k

ITM ASKS | PLAYLIST | INSPIRATION TAG | WATTPAD (OC)

As Great Britain's best hope at winning Men's 400m Hurdles at the Olympics next year in Tokyo, Japan, Harry Styles' future is looking especially bright. However, his coach has some secrets come out into the public eye that ends in Harry sacking him immediately. Now, he needs a new coach to take him to the very top. Enter Y/N. She won numerous gold medals running Women's Hurdles years ago and was at the height of her career when she was in a plane crash, causing her to live a life in utter solitude on the Somerset countryside to deal with her many losses. Now, years later, Harry's team is desperate for a good coach as the Olympics are only months away, and for some reason, when she is given the opportunity to coach Harry Styles for the Olympics, Y/N says yes. She has not been to Japan since the plane crash, and so travelling back there makes her need to face many fears, relive a lot of memories, work through more than she would like to, and it also - much to her utter dismay - makes her develop feelings for the person she should absolutely not have feelings for.

1. November 2019. 2. December 2019. 3. January 2020. 4. SUNDAY 13 FEBRUARY 9PM GMT! 5. SUNDAY 27 FEBRUARY 9PM GMT! 6. SUNDAY 13 MARCH 9PM GMT! 7. SUNDAY 27 MARCH 9PM GMT! 8. SUNDAY 10 APRIL 9PM GMT! 9. SUNDAY 24 APRIL 9PM GMT! 10. SUNDAY 8 MAY 9PM GMT!

That banner is temporary until I get my photoshop to work again lmao

DISCLAIMERS: 1) If you are under the age of 18, please be aware that this work is not for you. It targets adult themes, written by an adult, for adults. This is nothing against you as a person, but this story will deal with alcohol, violence, sexual content, etc, in short, themes not ideal for minors to be delving into. 2) The main character will be Japanese, meaning that parts of the fic will be heavily influenced by Japanese culture. However, I am Norwegian, so if you find yourself unsatisfied with the portrayal of the Japanese culture in this work, please do tell me! 3) This story will go into depth and explore the loss of a loved one, please take caution if this is something that might trigger you. 4) It will also deal with the memories the main character is left with after a very traumatic experience. 5) I have never tried hurdling myself, but I have watched it for a few years. If you have and know loads about the sport, please do pop by my inbox if you feel like something I’ve written isn’t right! 6) Asking me to update more often than when states above will not happen. I have a life outside of writing that – shock! – is a bit more important. Any ask or comment requesting me to update more frequently will be deleted. 7) Soz for sounding rude, just fed up with entitled twat anons.

WARNINGS: This story features explicit language, sexual content, alcohol, body image, death, and triggering topics (anxiety/depression etc.). Read at own risk if you are uncomfortable with any of those.

For any other questions regarding the storyline, characters, setting, etc, do not hesitate to drop by my askbox! Happy reading!

[hansoulo]

partial to the cavatina pt. 3 - (people and places)

Pairing: Javier Peña/f!Reader 

Warnings: cursing, spoilers for season 3 ep 2, brief mentions of suicidal thoughts

Word Count: like 1.17k soz the next one is gonna be a lot longer

Gif Credit: .....me  🤡🤡

A/N: if the tags for this don’t work i’m literally going to scream

part one  part two  playlist

The weather was miserable as Javier took a drag of his cigarette, holding the smoke in until it welled up in his chest and burned his throat. “Nice to see you again, Miss Alvarez.” Lie number one.

She faced back towards the street overlooking the Embassy. “Carolina, please.”

He cocked his head, not meeting her eyes. “Carolina.”

“I’m not here to interrogate you again, if that’s what you’re concerned about.”

“It’s not.” Lie number two.

Carolina let out an amused breath, the sound at odds with the tension thick between them. “Todo lo que quiero es un cigarrillo.” Javier obliged, silent as the roll of the lighter dragged against his thumb with a soft click. Nodding at her thanks, he tucked the paper carton back into his suit jacket. They stood like that for a minute or two, inhaling their respective cancers in the transient break. Then he saw you.

You looked a bit frazzled, quick strides down cracked cobblestone echoing faint with each step. A little girl was beside you - she couldn’t have been more than eight or nine- dwarfed by a backpack that was almost comically large compared to her small frame. Workbooks, thick and stuffed with loose papers, were clutched to your chest as you attempted to lead her down the street. He really, really hoped she was your student. Not a kid. Not your kid. You didn’t have any kids, right? Right.

Javier caught your eye a moment later, his expression softening a bit when  you shot him an apologetic smile. You tried to wave without dropping anything, weight teetering dangerously for a second before you righted yourself with a small chuckle. You were wearing black dress pants and a formal top that did absolutely nothing for your figure, but he still felt his chest seizing up, tightening with a tiny, imperceptible squeeze that fluttered like cello strings. He hadn’t seen you since you went to dinner (a week ago exactly - not that he was counting), both of you too busy to do much else except leave hasty messages on answering machines. 

Carolina turned, curious as she exhaled a thin column of smoke. “Do you know her?”

Yeah. He did. Javier  didn’t want her to know that, though. You weren’t a part of all this- this shit. You weren’t involved in Cali or chlorine gas or journalists or drugs. You were just… you. Lovely and loud and far-removed. He wanted to keep it that way.

“No,” he rasped out. “No, I don’t.” Lie number three.

She hummed, holding the cigarette between her fingers with a raised eyebrow.  Your attention had already been drawn back to the little girl - her fast chatter of accented English carrying over the asphalt - thankfully oblivious to being the subject of any conversation.

“She’s pretty,” Carolina observed. “Doesn’t seem like your type, though.”

He scoffed and put his cigarette out, its crumbling ash compacting underneath the heel of his shoe. “No comment.”

--------------

Javier wanted to die.

Well, not die. He wasn’t suicidal. If he could just maybe… stop existing. Just sort of fade into something non-conscious that didn’t have to deal with all the mess he’d dug himself into and couldn’t crawl out of. Steve wasn’t around anymore. Javier didn’t blame him.

He honestly didn’t know why he was still down here. Why he’d ever come in the first place, besides anger he didn’t know how to deal with and a weird, twisted wanderlust that could never be quelled no matter where he was. He’d spent his whole life running from things, trying to just get out and get away before the novelty of wherever he ended up wore off. There was really nothing keeping him in Colombia - with its gunshots and questions and deepening scowls - besides his own stubbornness to see it all through. What it was and when it would end, Javier didn’t really know.

He was just tired. Vices called, whispers of liquor voices and red lips that only told him what he wanted to hear, but he didn’t want to listen. The whiskey and women could only do so much and after a while, you get numb. Hunched over.

Then you came along, quick to smile and even quicker to laugh in a way that was infectious, growing on him like some sort of weird, positive parasite. That’s called a friend, you fuckhead, Javier thought to himself. Hopefully more than that. He really wanted you to be more than that.

And he knew you weren’t going to fix everything. He wasn’t stupid. You weren’t some angel sent to find some broken man and make him whole, some called-down messiah without flaw. If he was being honest, Javier found the whole concept of soulmates a bit ridiculous. The idea that someone was just supposed to complete you, to become the air you breathed. That sounded parasitic.

You were your own person, with a life that you would keep living even if he wasn’t in it - but he could still try to stay. Be someone better. Someone who wasn’t cruel or brooding, who didn’t drown themselves in things to feel less hollow. Someone who laughed, actually laughed until his stomach cramped and his cheeks hurt. Someone who was the reason you smiled. Someone who deserved to see it.

Maybe he should try the whole Nicorette thing.

--------------

“Hey!” you called out, running a bit to catch up with him. The market was crowded, throngs of people packed into narrow walkways all trying to avoid baskets and blankets and feet.”I’m sorry about yesterday. It’s just,  you looked busy and I was a bit preoccupied so I didn’t wanna-”

“It’s okay,” Javier assured you, slowing in his stride until you were shoulder to shoulder. “You looked like you had your hands full.”

Another laugh. You always seemed to be laughing. “Yeah,” you said. “We were coming back from a field trip but she got a bit lost, so…”

“Where to?” he asked as he moved to take the groceries from your arms. You didn’t have a chance to protest before the weight of the straps digging into your hands was lifted, his movements careful as to not hit anyone walking beside you.

“Thanks,” you smiled. “Cerro de Monserrate, actually.” For all the years he’d been down in Colombia, Javier couldn’t remember going there. Or anywhere, really, that wasn’t the Embassy or field work or shitty dive bars.

“I’ve never been,” he admitted as you neared the end of the market.

“Really?” you turned to him with wide eyes. “It’s beautiful, Javi. You should go.”

Javi. No one had called him that in what felt like ages. It was always Javier or sir or Peña, clipped and impersonal. Never Javi. He liked the way you made it sound - a little breathy, young and alive and washing soft velvet over the air between your bodies. He could hear you say it over and over.

He moved a little closer. “You should take me.”

translation: “Todo lo que quiero es un cigarrillo.” - “All I want is a cigarette.”

permanent: @ah-callie @itzagoodthing @spookypym @opheliaelysia @watsonwise @damndamer0n @amarvelousmandalorian @bunnyart-blog @agirllovespasta @pascalispedro @pascalplease @coffeencontemplation @chelsfic @lesqui @javierpenaspinkshirt​ @symbiont13 @glowingpena @squidlywiddly87 @1zashreena1 @hiscyarika @lostingoogletranslate @keeper0fthestars @bobafvtt @halfwaythereroyal @starwarsiscooliguess @huliabitch​

partial to the cavatina: @longitud-de-onda @way-too-addicted-to-anime​

part four

[nad-zeta]

Hello! I sent a match-up rq for IkeVamp as anon by accident. I am a 5'4 INFJ girl. I like to read books and write poetry. Some people describe me as a chameleon since I fit in with everyone but that's because as an empath I easily understand people. I tend to have panic attacks a lot. I am also very bubbly and friendly. I have a habit of overworking and not taking care of myself when I am focused on work. I easily blush and get very flustered with the simplest act of affection. Thanks! Tag me

Hehe, thank you so much for the request dear❤☺! Hehe soz for making ya wait sooooo long! 😱😳I hope you enjoy this, love and I hope you have the best day! ❤🌻☺

So I match you with.................. Comte 

It's no secret that for Comte it was love at first sight. This man has lived a looooong time, so the second his golden eyes glazed over you, as you were looking at one of Leonardo's paintings he knew. His heart started hammering in his chest, and a quiet voice whispered that you were the one. 

He shook his head, thinking the thought preposterous, he had stopped believing in soulmates a long time ago. He turned to leave when suddenly you gave his sleaves a gentle tug. He turned around, and the second those golden eyes locked with yours, his heart had been won. You smiled a bright smile as you handed him the dropped pocket watch. 

For the first time in this man's life, his heart was beating out of his chest, and his mind was blank. He felt like a silly teenager at the way he was rendered speechless, the second your hands touched. And he swore at that moment it was like a blot of electricity that had gone through him, sending a spark down his spine. 

He quickly gained his composure and smiled his all so charming smile as he thanked you. He had to shake his head from the silly little thoughts of soulmates and the ones. He had lived long enough to know not to get too attached. That, vampires, did not have the luxury of getting the destined soulmate and that he was fated to live out his eternal life alone. 

Sending another charming smile your way, he bid you farewell and made his way home, back the way he had come, a few days before. 

The charming smile and warm golden eyes of the mysterious man had stayed with you as you continued to explore the museum. You wondered around soon finding yourself before a large door, and curiosity must have killed the cat cause you found yourself gently pushing the door open, to explore further.

You suddenly found yourself in a completely new place. Gone were the white walls and tile floors of the museum. You were now surrounded by old fashioned wooden floors and wallpapered walls. You continued on with your explorations, walking in on a dinner attended by a variety of different characters. Before you could apologize and excuse yourself a familiar face caught your attention. Comte stared up at you in awe, just how on earth was it possible that you were now standing before him once more. He strode to your side, gently taking you hand in his to invite you to join them for dinner and the rest was history. 

You quickly befriended everyone in the mansion with your bubbly friendly personality. Cause you were a bit of a chameleon, you found yourself effortlessly blending in and adapting to life in the late 19th century. TBH all the residence adored you and saw you as a bit of a mother figure, being able to relate to and understand them. 

The one person who had taken the biggest liking to you, was the lord of the mansion himself. He loved that you got along so well with the residents of the mansion. He enjoyed that light airy feel you had that surrounding you and made a point of it to invite you to the garden for tea and snacks every day. He loved your bubbly personality, and the two of you would chat for hours on end about everything and anything. 

Comte had to laugh at the way you had adopted the role of mansion mom. Often when the residents would get up to mischief *cough Arthur cough* they would run to your side to avoid daddy Comte's wrath. You had Comte wrapped around your little finger, whether you knew it or not. If Arthur had taken a prank too far, he could be found hiding behind you, to avoid a Comte scolding session.

Comte realized rather quickly that you would get so involved in your work that you would simply forget to care for yourself. Often he would find you passed out in the library from exhaustion. He would usually let out a small sigh followed by the most tender smile, as he makes his way to your side to drape his jacket over you shoulders, before carefully picking you up and taking you back to your room. "Ma Cherie, you mustn't push yourself so hard," he gently whispers as he dusts a small kiss on your forehead as he tucks you into bed.

When you walk up later that night, you will wake up surrounded by the warmth of Comte's jacket and the sight of Comte sleeping on the edge of your bed. You can't help but smile as you run you finger through his golden locks.

Within seconds golden eyes flutter open to meet yours as he gives you with a lazy smile. "Ah your awake, you must be hungry, come, my dear let's go and get you some food." He then gently takes your hand in his and leads you to the kitchen to make you something to eat. You can't help but laugh as one would think that having lived as long as this man, he would be able to cook. Nope! Sabastian ran into the kitchen, panicked at the scent of smoke coming from the kitchen. He burst through the kitchen doors to find a small fire and both you in stitches laughing at Comte's lack of culinary skills to even make toast. Sabastian simply shakes his head with a slight chuckle at his lord and instructs both of you to wait in the dining room, while he whips up some food for the two of you.

Comte will be sure to visit you regularly to make sure you are taking care of yourself. He will legit whisk you away every lunchtime and take you out for lunch at a new cafe. If he sees you have been neglecting your sleep, he will invite you to his room and then lead you to his sofa. You will curiously eye the man as he gently guides your head to rest on his lap, as he starts to pull his finger through your hair with the softest of smiles, "you honestly make me worry, Ma Cherie, please rest for a little while." Sleep instantly finds you as he soothingly reads to you as he plays with you hair. 

This man will be by your side in a split second whenever you have a panic attack. He will wrap you up in is stong arms, as he soothingly traces small circles on you back, while telling you to focus on the sound of his heartbeat. He will help you get you breathing under control all while whispering the sweetest most encouraging word in your ears. "I am here Ma Cherie, I will always be here for you." Once you have finally got you breathing under control, he with tenderly caress you face as he wipes away all the fallen tears. It breaks his heart to see you so distressed. He will gently pick you up and take you to his room where he will spend the rest of the day cuddling with you. 

This man loves to tease you! Loves how flustered you get at any signs of affection. He will legit surprise you with little acts of affections like small lil kisses or hugs just to see the blush spread across your face. 

Often, the two of you are spending time together. Sometimes you are simply just in the same room, each busy with their own tasks. After finding you, Comte can't bear the thought of being parted from you, so he will spend as much time as possible by your side. Sometimes this boi gets lonely while working alone in his office, so he will bring his work with him to your room and just plop himself down beside you reading on your bed and continue working. He will most definitely occasionally kiss you hand or cheek, as the two of you continue with your own task snuggled side by side. Sometimes the man wonders how he ever survived without you in his life, as you bring so much light and love into his life that he has never known. 

Loves the fact that you are such a bubbly friendly chameleon, cause his job requires him to make many appearances at different balls and banquets, and as the love of his life, he is always more than thrilled when you accompany him. The room is always dazzled by the two of you cuties. Each of you charming the crowd in your own special way, to build up and foster new business connection. The two of you honestly suit each other perfectly. 

If you are feeling tired from all the socializing, Comte will quickly pick up on your silent cues and lead you to the dancefloor and spend the rest of the night with you in his arms, twirling you around. Otherwise, the two of you will enjoy the quiet of each other company out on the balcony as you watch the night sky.

This man will melt whenever you pull him away from his work to take a cuddle break. He is legit the happiest man in the whole world whenever you guide his head to rest on your lap, as you read your newest poem to him, all while pulling your fingers through his soft golden locks. I hope you are ready to be doted on and spoilt rotten cause this man loves to shower you in endless amounts of love and affection. It just so happens that his love language is both physical touch and giving gifts. So you best be sure every time you go shopping with Comte the two of you will return home with arms filled with parcels and packages.

Comte thanks his lucky stars every day for finally meeting his soul mate, the love of his life and the missing piece to his puzzle. And as such will spend every day of your eternal lives together, cherishing and loving you! 

Other potential matches……………… Napoleon 

I hope you enjoy this, dear! And I hope you have a super good day! ☺🌻❤🦋

[sargentr]

my fave drarry fics of all time, part one

so, after discovering i’ve officially been reading drarry fanfic for 4 years now, i decided to show my (quite big) list of favorite drarry fics. there are 46 in total, but i’ve listed 10 down below. the first three are my absolute favorites but the rest are equally as good

most of my notes are fresh from when i wrote them post-reading. i’ve changed some, seeming less like a crazy unstable bitch, but fuck these were all emotional as fuck. enjoy

ps: i dont really know how to tag people i dont follow. i cant try and tag the authors later. soz!!

pps: most of these i read when i was really into a bottom!draco phase, so most of them contain that, some are switch tho (as it should be, yikes past me)

1. Everything That Happen is From Now On / ~43K 

After surviving a brutal assault, Draco tries to navigate the tumultuous waters of his mind, and embrace a bit of love and trust in his life. After all, the smallest steps forward can begin to heal the most fractured of souls

okay so before i get in to how beautiful this story is, i wanna say that it does touch on rape quite explicitly. i cried like an idiot reading the entire thing, because draco’s pain is navigated in the most beautiful and realistic way. it touches on a subject very risky for me, very personal, and i still can’t think of a better drarry story. draco’s very draco about it all, and harry is very harry about it all. it’s just perfect, and messy, and tender, and sad. i’ve reread it more than any other fic, and it doesn’t disappoint. 

2. Pocket Full of Starlight / ~46K

When Scorpius Malfoy and Jamie Potter meet at Quidditch camp, they take an instant dislike to each other. Then they discover their lives are more connected than they could possibly imagine.

ah yes. the magic of kid fics. the TASTE

parent trap au. i read this one recently, like 3 months back, and absolutely fell in love with everything about it, partially because the parent trap is legit one of my top 10 favorite movies of all time. its just. the essence, the IDEA, is soooo mf beautiful. i cant get enough of reading when harry or draco finally meet the other twin, or how they cant stop loving each other even after 11 years. my heart clenched throughout the whole thing. 

3. Temptations on the Warfront / ~180K

Draco Malfoy is forced into hiding with the Golden Trio and dragged into their search for horcruxes. What ensues is a journey of redemption, unexpected friendships and an unwanted, turbulent romance with Harry Potter. Warnings for swearing, sexual content, and dark themes. 

this was the first drarry fic ive ever read, and before this mf i HATEDDD this pairing. so you can imagine how much it took to convince me otherwise, bc i was 100% scorbus before this.

to be fair, horcrux hunting with draco involved is, possibly, my favorite trope ever. its unique. theres tension, both sexual and life threatening. in some ways it romanticizes the war, but fuck it it aint a real war. 

slowest of burns. amazing. life changing. long as hell. nothing else to be said except read it right now i demand it.

4. Clouding the Senses / ~58K

As everyone returns to Hogwarts for a final eighth year, some people are coping better with the aftermath of the war than others. After encountering a very drunk Draco Malfoy one night, Harry realises that maybe those that lost loved ones aren’t the only ones trying to escape the war. Blaise Zabini seems to think Harry can help Malfoy, that the Slytherin might actually listen to him. Harry is not so sure. Dependence is a tricky thing, and one addiction can quickly shift to another.

everyone that reads drarry loves 8th year fics, but this ones just kinda different from all those normal (yet entertaining) ones. draco’s an alcoholic in this, and one night harry tries to help him and whoops, one thing leads to the other and they start having casual sex. its really, really amazing how both draco and harry navigate the addiction, i really cant say it has any flaws. 

i know the author got a lot of hate on their fics and thats why they took them down, but they’re truly one of the best drarry authors out there. i’ve reread this a couple of times, and the tenderness, the love and confusion is all very on character. a+

5. Restraint / ~153K

Someone casts the Imperius curse on Draco Malfoy, and whatever the instructions may be, Harry finds himself an unwilling target. The encounter leaves him torn between pleasure and revulsion. As they fight in the aftermath, a tense game begins. Harry fights to convince Malfoy, and himself, that he was not affected by that initial encounter, or any of those following it.

Faced with a series of escalating encounters, Harry must come to terms with desiring things he never thought he could, things he wishes he didn’t respond to. They each use signs of arousal as weapons against each other in a mad struggle to finally shame the other into backing down for good. 

But it’s only after the game is over that Harry starts to understand.

this is by the same author of clouding the senses, and i read this just this week. at first, it’s shocking, because it plays around with consent in a very unsettling way. when communication comes in, and its starts getting healthier, you can really understand where the author found the idea of playing with consent. it is, in my opinion, 100% characteristic of how they would behave post-war, with that grief and confusion. it’s also dom/sub in some parts, and that’s mf hot. 

it also has my favorite tropes in it, but it’s a spoiler to say which one. i’ll probably mention the trope in the list along with a bunch others, but when u finish reading you’ll know which one ;)

6. Humbug / ~30K

Draco has been taking his casual relationship with Harry for granted. Visits from four key ghosts the night before Christmas just might shake up his priorities in life.

(felt like it was valid to just paste what i wrote in my notes app after reading this)

(FUCKKKKKK HOW TO EVEN START?!!!?? just a fucking bonus, draco is THE best bottom o ever exist i love my bottom son so much. this story isnt only amazing it’s excruciatingly painful to read, harry and draco have been sleeping together but harry is completely in love with him. draco doesnt see how much harry cares for him or how much hes hurting harry by treating their fling like its just that, a FLING. with that, draco is haunted by three ghosts. one of the past, the present and the future, AND THEY SET THAT IDIOT STRAIGHTTTT 1800000/10. the gays DO KEEP MF WINNING!!!

7. in your arms, rests my world / ~24K

Harry presses his mouth to Malfoy's forehead; he wants to tell him that he’ll never leave, that he wouldn’t dream of it.

“You make me feel safe, Potter” Malfoy whispers. “You keep me safe.”

the friends with benefits trope doesnt ever disappoint, top 5 tropes fr, especially if its also 8th year. harry and draco get into their little thing, but of course nothing ever is simple between them. by the preview, you can clearly see how much draco likes harry (also another 10/10 trope, the ‘i’ve been in love with harry potter since i was 11′ one). my only tiny issue with this is that harry fucks it up just a tad, but it of course adds up to the drama of it all, which i absolutely love.

noting it also touches on non-con/rape and, and all in all, is extremely angsty. one i was tense from beginning to end. but i am gonna say it ends amazingly and v happily.

8. Playing the Hero / ~29K

Nobody kissed me like Harry did. He kissed like he flew; he kissed like he duelled - with his whole being, not caring about anything else. I had never felt as vulnerable as I did when he kissed me, seizing all and any control I had over myself. But when Harry kissed me, I felt free...

so the thing about angst is that it ignites that mf feeling side u that even tho it hurts you cannot get enough of. this fic was EVERYTHINGGG. it made cry and laugh and smile. also another trope i absolutely adore is them breaking up and not being 100% ok with that, bc ding ding!! YALL STILL LOVE EACH OTHER!! 

i cant describe how i felt, honestly. i would just paste my notes (i wont bc spoilers) but it looks like i went thru sum shit. deadass

9. fine i’ll hold my breath / till i forget it’s complicated  / ~ 15K with the two parts

Harry and Draco become friends with benefits, and Harry thinks it's more complicated than it actually is.

u know, fluff is a drug. i dont know if its beucase 90% of drarry fics are about angsty get-togethers, but i had butterflies in my stomach when i read this. its adorable. draco is so clearly in love, he jusT SMILES A LOT I CANTTT. 

its cute. i love it to death. have some fluff before starting your day.

10. Un Noël très parisien / ~14K

When Draco crossed paths with Auror Potter at a political function in Paris, he was not expecting their former animosity to change into something rather more intriguing. But he could be certain their casual flirtation would not last more than the night, couldn't he?

look. i know i named a lot of my favorite tropes here, but i cant end this without mentioning how much single dad draco affects me. i love scorpius and how much he changes draco in every fic he appears. i love parent draco and i shant be silent about it (especially when scorpius is legit just a year old in this. i died)

as it states, harry and draco have a one night stand but draco thinks thats it, that it was all he was ever gonna have. he’s wrong of course, and the path it takes, with both scorpius and harry there, just melted my mf heart.

well kids that’s all i have for now. imma work on a part two with 10 other fics i really love!1

[angelicspaceprince]

Photographs

Author:  Ama

Title: Photographs

Pairing: Established Beetlejuice/Reader, friends Beetlejuice and Lydia

Character/s: Beetlejuice, Lydia.

Word Count: 1, 814 words

Warnings: Mentions of yellow fever and death, possible historical inaccuracies, Beetleboi being a sad boi.

Tags:  @justballoonfishthings, @beetlejuicecansteponme, @yankyo, @beetlebitchywitch, @scribblepigeon, @trelaney, @kyuubinu, @imma-fucking-nerd (some I tagged bc I wanted you to suffer with me, others bc I’ve been ranting about this to you guys all morning, enjoy!)

Summary: Lydia finds a box at Beetlejuice’s house, not realising that what it contains is an emotional subject for her friend. He goes through each item in the box and explains the history of the person the images are centered around.

Notes: Two fics within hours of each other? What magic is this? Also, I hit you with cuteness, and now I hit you with sad. Suffer.

So, I’ve fallen in love with a song that Alex Brightman sings from the 35mm musical called Cut You A Piece and it gives me tears every time I hear it so here. Have a fic loosely based on it.

Basically, the Beetlejuice I’m using is Musical!Juice but stuff like Lydia visiting his house in the Netherworld is more from the cartoon. You were alive in the 1850s. There are mentions of yellow fever and death in this fic. It’s pretty sad, if people want a happy ending hmu and I’ll try and scrounge something together. I also based the hair colours off dreammbc’s mood ring hair headcanons found here. Takes place after the musical, Beej disappeared for about a year before returning to hang out with his best friends and everyone in the Deetz house are fine with him sue me I want a happy family ending. Female reader, soz all. Enjoy!

Buy Me a Coffee

Photographs

Beetlejuice hadn’t thought of you in the better part of sixty years. Possibly longer. It was too hard to think about you and what happened. He didn’t like crying or feeling broken, but after everything that happened? He just broke down whenever he thought of you.

So, when Lydia brought up the box in the living room that remained firmly shut, the sudden onset of emotions that attacked him was enough for Lydia to decide to get out.

He was never good with emotions.

It took a couple of days before he calmed down, his hair slowly having blue and yellow slowly streaking into it compared to the pitch black it had been since Lydia brought up the box. It took another day for him to sheepishly return to the Deetz’s to apologise, box in hand.

He apologised for scaring her (he didn’t) and that he just needed his space (she knows) but if she really wanted to know what was in the box, he could show her now.

The curious teen tentatively took the box from him and opened it up. Inside were a few, old looking photos of a woman dressed in what appears to be just an everyday dress from the mid 1800’s and a very clean looking Beetlejuice dressed in similarly aged attire. Both of you were laughing and smiling, holding onto each other, clearly very much in love. Beneath all five of the photos was what clearly used to be a pressed rose, although it looked a little beyond dead at this point, and two silver rings, one larger than the other. Lydia carefully held each object as Beetlejuice looks down at them next to her, clearly in another world as he just watches her go over every single item. “Who was she?” She finally asks, pointing to the woman in the picture.

“Y/N.” He breaths out, a small smile appearing on his lips as he takes the photo, the last one the two of you took together before-. “She was my fiancé.” He explains softly as he thumbs over your laughing face at whatever bad joke, he had told you right before the photo was taken. “Well, nearly.” Lydia looks over at the photos again, it’s clear in every single one Beetlejuice is absolutely smitten. She turns over the top photo in the pile on her lap, in green ink and swirled writing she makes out the caption. ‘June 6th, 1852. Beetlejuice and Y/N, New York. Pretty sure the photographer was over us by the end.’

“How did you meet?” She doesn’t look up from the pile in her lap, continuing to turn over each photo to reach the written message on the back. She didn’t notice the fond smile and his mood ring hair slowly turning to a pastel green.

“Her friends summoned me as a joke.” He starts. “19th century was filled with people who wanted to communicate with the dead, her friends didn’t think that anything would happen but then I showed up and they all booked it. She thought I was hysterical so she kept me around. About a year later, she asked me to court her and so we started dating.” He starts to fidget and fiddle, putting the photo back in the box so he doesn’t ruin it with the anxiety that’s running through his body. The last thing he wants to do is crinkle the photos or, God/Satan forbid, rip it. “We dated for about three years, those photos were for our first anniversary. She didn’t believe in the whole getting married thing, we were already living together and that was enough for her. Bit unconventional for the time, but that was my Y/N.” His smile widens slightly when the happy memories start to wash over him. “Was always there if I needed help scaring someone, always there to bounce ideas. Couldn’t stand the fact that I was filthy all the time, so I took to bathing for her which was a big deal for both of us. She had a higher standard of cleanliness than most people back then. Couldn’t dance to save herself though. Not wearing those dresses, she kept tripping over the skirts.”

Lydia listens to every word, letting Beetlejuice more or less spill his heart out. Neither of them are into heart-to-hearts, but its pretty evident that this time around, its what her friend needs. She listens as he lists off every single thing he loved about her and the things that frustrated him about her, every tiny detail she loved about life and the things she hated, what she loved about him and what caused her to want to beat him with a stick. It was like all of a sudden, he could remember every detail that he had thought he had forgotten, and if he didn’t voice them, they’d be gone. By the end of it, his hair was streaked with faint blue with his pastel green, voice was wobbly, and eyes wear close to shedding tears. Lydia knew that he had to get it out of his system and, even though it made her uncomfortable, she wanted to give him permission to just let it out.

“What happened to her?” Her voice is gentle and encouraging as he clears his throat, not really wanting to tell her how your relationship ended, but needing to nonetheless.

“She died.” He quietly admits. “Yellow fever, there was an outbreak around 1853, 1855. She was one of the last ones to die.” He swallowed before continuing. “I thought something was wrong, but she insisted it was just a cold. She was so hot, couldn’t even stand to hear me walk across the floor to get her something to drink. Couldn’t eat she was so tired, but she was in so much pain she couldn’t sleep. So, she just cried and held on to me to keep her cool.” Beetlejuice closed his eyes, already seeing her face resurfacing in his mind. “It was after three days of pain she started to puke her guts up. Three days after that, she was vomiting blood. Two days after that, she started going yellow. She kept saying that she didn’t want to go to hospital but when she started to go yellow in her eyes and her skin looked like she had been rolling around in the yellow dye vat at her work, I just stood up and carried her there myself.” He swallows. “I should have taken her there sooner, by the time we got her there she was already too close to death. I stayed with her in that hospital, helped her drink whatever little water I could and let her sleep with me keeping her cool. She just continued to go yellow. There was so much blood, Lyds, I never thought a breather could produce so much.” He needs to breath, the smell of the hospital refilling his nose was getting to be too much for him. “Eventually, she just slept. She slept for another week before she died in my arms. And that was the end of that.” He retakes the photo from before and flips it over, in his messy and almost illegible handwriting he reread the words he’d written there over a hundred years ago in the same green ink. ‘Marry me?’ “I should have taken her to the hospital sooner, but I thought she’d know best. She was still a breather, I hadn’t been alive for centuries by that point, I thought perhaps I was overreacting because I was excited. I found out about the clause, if you marry a breather you become one too. I was going to propose to her and explain that we could have an actual relationship together and die together, be a bit more normal. I never got that chance.” In anger, he throws the photo back down as he slams back onto Lydia’s bed. It’s only now that she realises his hair is streaked in almost every colour of the rainbow as conflicting emotions hit him from left, right and centre. She gives him a minute before slowly packing everything away.

“Did you look for her?” She hears him nod against the mattress, his eyes still pressed firmly shut as he tries his best to cry silently.

“Spent nearly a hundred years looking through the Netherworld tryna find her. Spent a bit of time looking up here too. No luck. She’s gone, babes. You will never find what you’re looking for in the Nether, so there’s no point in looking.” He cracks open an eye to look at the box now sitting between him and the goth teen and sighs. “I try not to think of her, it hurts too much. But wherever I go, she comes too.”

Lydia hums. She gets it, to a degree. It hurts every single time she thinks of her mother, how sick she got and how quick she had died. But she still needed to think of her, she’d rather face the pain than forget her mother. And she also knows what it feels like when wherever you go, you feel like you’re carrying that person with you. “Perhaps it’s what you need? It hurts but you still have all your good memories.” He hums, not really agreeing or disagreeing. “It sounds like you cut her a piece of you, and she cut you a piece of her. You carry her now and I think she carries you too, Beej.”

Beetlejuice doesn’t make a sound, but he did hear her. It takes a while for his emotions to slowly simmer down to background noise and once it does, he simply sits up, grabs the box and shuts it away, leaving everything as it was before he opened it. Perhaps one day, he will be able to open the box without hurting and perhaps, one day, he will run into you again. Perhaps it’ll work out for him in the long run. But for now, he’d rather not think about it.

“Let’s go scare your dad kid, I’ve been letting him relax for too long now.” The demon offers as a distraction. Lydia, under normal circumstances, wouldn’t let him get away that easy. But she’s willing to let this one slide as the two of them leave the room to go plot a way to give Charles the fright of his life, leaving the box on the bed unattended, unseen, as it opens, and a sixth photograph appears on top of the pile. Of a very sickly-looking woman sleeping in the arms of a very stressed demon sleeping in a hospital bed surrounded by other sick people. On the back, the words simply say ‘Wherever you go, I’ll go too. I lost my life when I lost you.’ You can wait for him to be ready to find you again, however long it takes.

[msjr0119]

Return to New York

Part 3

Riley Brooks never returned after being thrown out of the Coronation. Liam cleared her name, and they tried to find her with no luck. One day they returned to New York and by fate she turned up at a cafe due to Daniels ‘meddling’.

Using combined tags for this one shot turned mini series- as always let me know if you want to be removed:

@pedudley @kacie-0156 @loveellamae @annekebbphotography @burnsoslow @ladyangel70 @kingliam2019 @bbrandy2002 @butindeed @bascmve01 @drakewalker04 @captain-kingliamsqueen @duchessemersynwalker @insideamirage @of-course-i-went-to-hartfeld @kozabaji @texaskitten30 @ibldw-main @kimmiedoo5 @nikkis1983 @gnatbrain @walker7519 @lodberg @cmestrella @hopefulmoonobject @addictedtodrakefanfic @angi15h @liamxs-world @rafasgirl23415 @notoriouscs @yukinagato2012 @dcbbw @qammh-blog @nz1091 @cordonianroyalty @custaroonie @seriouslybadchoices @rainbowsinthestorm @princess-geek @jared2612 @desiree-0816 @twinkle-320 @queenjilian

*****

“Please don’t marry him.” Drake sighed regretting saying this. “I just... I am in love with you Riley Brooks, and I can’t watch you with him... I want you to be happy... honestly I do... just give me and Cordonia another chance... then you can make your decision...”

“Drake, I’m marrying him in less than two weeks... I can’t ... I love you too... I... I should go...” Turning around she placed her engagement ring back on her finger, whilst shaking. “I haven’t stopped thinking about you since I was thrown out of the coronation Drake, here’s my number. Don’t be a stranger.” Fuck what am I doing? I don’t want to leave him. “Ri... I hope you’re happy. Don’t forget that I love you and always will do.”

Leaving the room she slid down the wall in the hallway unable to contain her emotions- almost reconsidering her actions, wanting to storm through the door and claim Drake as her own as she wanted to all those years ago. Wiping her tears, she was undecided about what her future held for her.

Drake threw the whiskey bottle against the wall as she left, feeling frustrated allowing her to walk away from him again. Believing now that it was never meant to be. The last time Drake cried was possibly when he had lost his father, years later he found himself crying over the girl he lost yet again.

*****

Eleven days after they returned to Cordonia from New York, Maxwell knocked on Liam’s study door. Usually the King would answer straight away- ignoring protocol the Lord barged through the door, immediately regretting his actions.

“Your Majesties, honestly....” Tutting and shaking his head. “Is this what they call working nowadays?”

“Maxwell! Get out of here!”

“Sorry Anna, Jesus I can practically see the baby’s head appearing...” Covering up his wife, Liam’s eyes widened a she focused his gaze towards his friend.

“Maxwell this better be important. What’s up?”

“Ohhh I’ll give you a minute to clean yourselves up... I just needed to ask a favour... rather than sex, why not try giving her a spicy curry?” Maxwell suggested- Liam grit his teeth, his wife felt him become tense. Pulling her pants back up, she jumped into his arms and passionately kissed him.

“I love you Liam, I’ll see you soon.”

“I love you too my queen.” Reaching for the scotch, he was annoyed that his friend had cockblocked him in his own private space. Sighing as taking a sip, he hoped that this was important and not nonsense.

“So?”

“Erm, I had an SOS call from blossom last night...”

“Is she okay?” Liam asked in a panic stricken tone of voice- he cared for Riley beyond words even when she disappeared out of their lives.

“I’ve been speaking to her since we left, she’s having cold feet. I can’t go to the wedding tomorrow and watch her marry someone she doesn’t want to...”

Riley was at her final dress fitting, most brides would be excited the closer it got to their wedding day- but not her. Covering the bruise up with make up, she had hoped that the dress would cover it up- which it did, luckily. The night of her kiss with Drake she returned home, Harry immediately smelt whiskey and cologne on her- in a jealous rage he grabbed her arm pleading for the truth from her, which she eventually confessed. Loosening the grip, he apologised immediately for harming her - reviving his normal personality, the one she fell in love with. Ringing Maxwell up on the way to work; she needed advise but didn’t want to inform him of the injury on her arm.

“Hey Max!” Maxwell excused himself from the table, gesturing for Olivia and Hana to follow. Ever since he found out that they had been in touch with her over the years, he had been plotting with them a way to get her back in Cordonia. Since their return, Drake had kept himself to himself- not wanting to talk to anyone no matter how hard they tried to convince him.

“Hey Blossom, how are you?”

“I’m ... erm.... I’ll be fine. How’s Drake?”

“Quiet.” The two women answered in unison.

“Hey you two. Max.... I keep breaking hearts, everyone is going to hate me. I just don’t know what to do. I want to run. I want to scream. I cry all the time.”

“Do you want me to come now?”

“No. I’ve got this stupid rehearsal dinner. Shit. I can’t do this.”

“You’re the stupid bitch who fucked her boss, got engaged to him. If you don’t want this don’t do it!” Olivia snapped, she had spent three years being frustrated with Riley’s attitude- she wasn’t exactly Drakes biggest fan but at this moment in time she knew that they were made for each other.

“Max, I’ll see you in a couple of days- I expect a good speech at the wedding. Love you all.”

After reiterating the conversation on the phone, Maxwell’s eyes pleaded with his friend- the King, to help him. “So what favour do you need?”

“I need the jet... for a runaway car- well plane- well jet... you know what I mean.”

“And what if she marries him?”

“Then I’ll be travelling back in luxury your Majesty- but you know how persistent I am...”

“I hope you succeed in bringing her back. Take Glen with you. I’d suggest Bastien, but I’ll need him here.”

“Yes Sir. House Beaumont will revive.” I hope so, Liam thought to himself.

*****

Riley added the finishing touches to her bridal look, unable to look at herself in the mirror- guilt for breaking Drakes heart. Drake. That’s the man she was thinking about on her wedding day to another man. Even during the rehearsal dinner, her thoughts lingered on Drake Walker- wondering what he was doing, was he thinking about her too? Providing fake smiles towards everyone that attended the rehearsal dinner, Harry had no inkling regarding Riley’s true feelings- if she learnt anything from Cordonia it was from Liam- his stoic expressions. Holding the three handwritten letters in front of her, she had an hour to make a life changing decision.

Maxwell opened the door slowly yet quietly not wanting to announce his presence, viewing her staring at her reflection in a trance- his heart broke for her.

“Surprise Blossom!” Lifting the white lacy material up, she turned towards him- tears flowing down her face uncontrollably. “You look beautiful Riley, like a princess.. you should be happy.”

“I... I can’t do this.... I can’t marry him Max...”

“Well you know what to do....”

“What?”

“Take those shoes off before you break your neck and run. I’ll race ya.” Still undecided about what to do, Maxwell knelt down- removing her shoes. “You don’t want this Ri. Don’t put yourself through anymore heartbreak. Follow your heart.”

“Can you do me a favour? Can you give these letters to Harry and Lissy?”

“Of course. Who’s the other one for?”

“Drake. If I went through with it, I needed him to know the truth.”

“Well you can give him it yourself. Then maybe have make up sex.”

“Max! We haven’t even slept together before. We’ve just kissed.”

“But I bet you had scandalous dreams about doing more with the handsome commoner?”

“Shut the fuck up- are you getting me out of this marriage or not?”

“Yes Lady Riley Of House Beaumont- I will deliver the letters. Then we run.”

*****

“Yo dude....” Maxwell shouted walked down the aisle, over dramatically bowing to the guests.

“Shouldn’t you be walking down with my bride?”

“Yeah about that... here... sorry dude but you’re just not the one for her. Nice knowing ya. No hard feelings mate, soz. See ya.” Running back up the aisle, through the echo of gasps- he knew they had to run before Harry convinced her to marry him. Entering the room, he hoped she was ready to leave.

“Whatcha doing still in your dress?”

“I can’t get the zip down... fuck it. Let’s go, I’ve been looking at flights.....”

“Don’t bother, we are travelling in style- the jets waiting quick!” Grabbing her arm, she stopped him.

“I need my things Max.”

“Why do you think I was late? Glen broke into your house and literally threw everything into boxes.” Before Riley could react, he grabbed her hand again- leading her out of the hotel. Running into the middle of the road- he hoped a cab would stop.

“Max!”

“What?”

“You’re going to get yourself killed!”

“But it worked it... so it’s all okay... jump in blossom.”

*****

After a long flight, they arrived back in Cordonia- Riley’s hair had become slightly dishevelled but Maxwell still believed she was still beautiful. Laying on his chest during the flight- he was eager to text Drake immediately, but decided against it. Feeling smug with himself for wedding crashing, he couldn’t wait to see everyone’s expression when he walked in with Riley.

Glen opened the door of the SUV when they arrived at Ramsford- Riley had fallen asleep again, deciding to carry her he was grateful that she was as light as a feather.

“Honey I’m home!” Maxwell shouted, laughing to himself. Walking into the lounge, he saw all their friends look gobsmacked that the spare heir, the ‘dopey’ friend had succeeded.

“What have you done to her? Drugged her?”

“Jet lag... why would I drug her Liv? Shh... she’s waking up... blossom? Welcome home baby.” Bertrand knelt down, he never believed in Riley during the social season but he was glad that she was home.

“Hello Lady Riley. Welcome back.” Helping her sit up, she rubbed her eyes- removing the remainder of sleep. Still wearing her engagement ring, looking at it made her for the first time feel guilty. “Thanks Bertrand. Nice to see you all.” Noticing that Drake wasn’t there she felt slightly disappointed but didn’t blame him one bit.

“Lady Riley, I’d like to introduce you to Queen Anna- my wife.”

“Hi Anna, Erm your Majesty. It’s so lovely to finally meet you.”

“And you too. I’ve heard so much about you. All these lot ever do is talk about the infamous Riley. Especially Drake.” Providing her with a soft smile, Riley tried to ignore the fact that she mentioned his name. Noticing Liam and Anna hold each other tightly yet lovingly, Riley in a way was glad with how the past events occurred.

“Well I did cause quite a stir during my short time here.. I’m just going to get a drink of water, have a wander around. Get my bearings again.” Maxwell was about to become her shadow until Olivia pulled him back down.

“What the fuck Olivia?”

“She needs this time alone...” Emphasising the word alone, everyone but Maxwell knew what she was referring to.

****

After helping herself to a glass of water, her mind led her to the ballroom. Closing her eyes, her memories from the infamous Beaumont bash rushed through her mind.

Welcome to the Beaumont Bash... you’ll recognise some of these fine floral arrangements as yours...

Brooks... you look...

Yes?

Ready for the party. Everything here really came together.

I know, right? Though... you don’t look like you’re dressed for the occasion.

You don’t like this look? This shirts clean.

I guess that’s the most I should expect. I don’t think I’ve ever seen you dress up for these fancy events. It might be a nice change of pace.

Eh. Fashion is subject. Besides, people are here to see the prince, not me.

“Not everyone was here to see Liam. I wonder if Maxwell wants a replay of truth or dare tonight? If I was stranded on a deserted island, where I’d never see anyone or any civilisation ever again- I’d always choose Drake.” Laughing at the memory, she raised her glass into the air- to friendship.

“Be honest Brooks, you just want me there so I’m suffering as much as you are.” Turning around following the location of the voice, she believed that she was hallucinating. Seeing him leaning against the wall, folding his arms wearing that infamous smirk- she placed the water on the windowsill.

“Mostly just to see how you’d look in a grass skirt.” Both deciding to walk towards each other, closing the distance- Riley jumped into his arms holding him tightly. Leaning down kissing her, it somehow wasn’t the same as before. In his mind, this time someone had actually chosen him or so he hoped. Parting away from the brief reunion kiss- they stared at one another longingly, neither knowing what to do next. Drake still held her protectively and leaned back in- their lips crashing together, their tongues battling against each other’s, both fighting for dominance. Placing her back on the ground, he pulled her flush towards him- laying her head on his broad chest, she listened to the rhythm of his heartbeat increasing.

“I knew you’d change your mind. I knew you’d come.”

[punkscowardschampions]

Janis & Jimmy

Janis: 🥱🥱 Jimmy: Afternoon Janis: Piss off Janis: it's the crack of dawn Janis: bet the boy ain't even woke up yet to 👀 the decs Jimmy: it's a lie in for me Janis: before you handicapped me, I was getting up pretty early too 🐕🏃 Jimmy: @ Helena and her 💊s Jimmy: that there's the handicap Janis: her back ain't that bad Janis: anyway 💊s aren't gonna make me jolly Jimmy: go on then Jimmy: what do you need, baby? Janis: 😏 Janis: Is that any way for an elf to talk? Jimmy: depends what you 🖋 in your letter to 🎅 Jimmy: might be dead on Janis: You reckon that's top of my list? Jimmy: know what you're like with 👴💕 Janis: 🥇 or nowt Janis: makes Lucas look 🥉 for sure Jimmy: writing lines in detention ain't gonna come close Janis: Only just started this holiday Janis: you need cheering up too 🌧 Jimmy: don't sound like me, that Janis: ☀️ Janis: not much chance of that today ☃️ Jimmy: you not coming then? Janis: You really are on form this AM Janis: very quotable Jimmy: won't be long til 💀👑's getting out her 🛁 of 🩸 for a new day of torture Jimmy: have to sleep when we're ⚰ Janis: grind never sleeps 💪 Janis: so glad she only has 😍 for one 👴 though Jimmy: they've had years to perfect that roleplay Jimmy: must be 🥇 Janis: 🤢🤢 nah Janis: not gonna be able to face breakfast now Janis: 💔 that's why she can't either, awh Jimmy: stop finding common ground, it's 💔 me Janis: Baby Janis: sure if you asked really nicely, they'd let you work a double shift Jimmy: funny Janis: You walked right into that one Jimmy: there'd be nowt 💔😭🎻 for me about walking our kid to you and pissing off to work if you want some alone time with your real boyfriend 🎅 Janis: yeah right Janis: be all good until he starts 💔😭🎻 and I'd have to come find you Jimmy: I get it, you're off the 🎪🤹🤡 clock Janis: just don't reckon I know enough sign language to win him over Jimmy: reckon you could leave it to 🎅 Jimmy: seems like he'd be a traditional kind of #lad, chuffed for you to be 🤐 and just bake the mince pies Janis: 🤤 what can't he do Jimmy: probably wouldn't have got 💀👑's cooking down him any easier than we did Janis: I didn't mind the excuse to go to the bathroom Jimmy: SUCH a 💊head, you Janis: 🙄 Janis: don't judge me, babes Jimmy: just her decor Jimmy: best that bathroom's ever gonna have looked with your giant head blocking out them ugly tiles Janis: should've dashed yours into 'em Jimmy: 🤤🤤🤤 Janis: gutted we didn't get to sleepover Janis: would've had plenty of time to redecorate 🩸 Jimmy: hang on, I'll set one up Jimmy: liven up the group chat Janis: 😂 Janis: you are SUCH a peacekeeper it's SOOOOOOOOOOO cute I can't 😻 Janis: run out of sleeps before 🎅 pays 'em all a visit Jimmy: 💰 on Asia getting into a #scandal thinking if she rubs the coal he gave her on her face she'll have a charcoal face mask ready to go Janis: Can't wait to #cancel her for good Jimmy: just better not have the sleepover here, that kind of casual racism could have her in the running for my new step ma Janis: imagine the unfortunate children Janis: massive heads and bigger teeth Janis: christ Jimmy: don't Jimmy: I'm basically illiterate, they'd be thick as shit Janis: the work would truly NEVER end Janis: you leave her in charge of 'em... 🍄💉🧱🧨🪓🔥 Jimmy: however many 👶 they churned out, she's one more on top of Janis: can't let that happen to you Jimmy: but near worth it for the #goals 👰🤵 pics obvs Janis: you wouldn't even be the cutest page boy Janis: tragic 💔 Jimmy: long as you keep faking your 😍 mate, don't matter Janis: I think I'll manage Janis: 🏆 at stake Jimmy: gotta take at least one job seriously, I'm doing your other Janis: 1. stop any time and let me 2. and your sister when you can't be arsed Jimmy: my sister when I've gotta be audience to your gingerbread masterpiece, more like Jimmy: can't have you going without 👏 Janis: don't throw down the gauntlet if you don't want me to show you how it's done Jimmy: when a lass begs me for a challenge, she gets one Jimmy: just that dickhead Janis: If I was gonna beg, you'd know about it Jimmy: you did and I did Jimmy: stop flirting with me, I've got a kid to shake away Jimmy: *awake Janis: yeah piss off and be useful Janis: 👋 in a few Jimmy: you got that hint then? Know what your room reading skills are like Janis: 'course you do Janis: got to have something to aspire to Jimmy: 🥇 or nowt don't mean cracking on with the second bit, case you need that spelling out an' all Janis: you're the one that's thick Janis: in your own words, spellchecked, I assume Jimmy: and I've still got better social skills, Julie 💔 for you Janis: if I got paid by the hour, I might bother as well 😘 Jimmy: Oi that's a point Jimmy: never left a tip in my jar, you Janis: you mean the one time I came in? Jimmy: you'd have preferred some festive bollocks off the menu, yeah? Jimmy: I'll sort that for next time 🤶 Janis: maybe I preferred another barista boy, and I know how tip jars work, make you share it out all equally 👎 Jimmy: alright but do you know how pockets work? I've got a few of them to slip 💰 in Jimmy: you can have that tip to slide into your new boyfriend's DMs with 😘 Janis: you aren't strippers Janis: if you want to go the hooter route, you're gonna need to make those aprons shorter Jimmy: there's a few 👴👵 who ain't had that memo Jimmy: I'll @ my manager with your 🥇💡 though, see if he'll get it done for this afternoon shift Janis: you're welcome Janis: you'll be cold but swimming in 💰 so who cares Jimmy: northerns don't feel the cold, bit like strippers Jimmy: *northerners Janis: you didn't totally wimp out on the school trip Janis: or the park Jimmy: 💪🏆 me Jimmy: Ian'll be dead proud Janis: yeah Janis: shame about the complexion Janis: leave it out and you can brag and bond Jimmy: 🍻 Janis: heartwarming Jimmy: hang on, this'll have you 💀💀💀 inside again Jimmy: [Bobby's reaction vid to these decs] Janis: Awh Janis: bless him Jimmy: we did alright Janis: you happy too? Janis: no video needed Jimmy: [a pic like 😁👍] Janis: 🤓 Jimmy: *😎🚬 Janis: 👌 honey Janis: does look good Jimmy: he's doing a letter to say tah to Santa, might need you to spellcheck it for us Janis: He's well cute Janis: doubt I'll get mine to do it but her penmanship is shite so he'll look 🥇 in comparison Jimmy: wait til he 👀s mine Jimmy: I'll have to tell him it ain't just a squiggle but actually says tah for the missus and that, mate Janis: 🎅💔 Jimmy: *🎅🥊 Janis: 😂 Janis: long as the kids are distracted by the shit gifts they'll get Jimmy: do you want your shit 🎨🎁 now or in a bit? Janis: give it to me when they get theirs or I'll 🥺 Janis: love ruining christmas, me Jimmy: don't sound like you, that Jimmy: 🥇🎄 work Janis: don't forget the gingerbread house Janis: as I crave that 👏 Jimmy: I'll knock you up a tinfoil 🏆 to go with your 👑 Janis: what you gonna cover your no carb low fat tofurkey with?!!!!? 😱😱😱 Jimmy: you're more important, girl Janis: taste better, is the honest truth Janis: don't need to be a 🧛 to know Jimmy: 😏 Jimmy: I'll stick that in the group chat Janis: you can say it but they're not gonna find out for themselves Jimmy: as constructive criticism goes it ain't bad but no need to take it as an instruction, lasses Janis: 🤢🤢 Janis: stop making me feel ill Janis: I've got to go break the ✨ surprise and get all the 🏆👑 Jimmy: piss off then Janis: TTFN Jimmy: 💕 Janis: [actually skip forward now] Janis: where do you wanna meet? we're ready Jimmy: We'll walk over, get the intros out the way before 🎅 can stick his oar in Janis: 👍 Janis: she's pretty good at pronunciation for a kid but you might have to step in if she gets too chatty Jimmy: keep her on the nice list, I get it Janis: Don't worry, she's not a dick like my sister or anything Jimmy: I weren't Jimmy: you wouldn't have invited her if she were owt like Gracie Janis: Good Janis: we'll be outside ☃️☃️ Jimmy: 👍 Janis: not got any 🚬🕶 going so can't make it in your likeness this time soz Jimmy: long as you get the 👂 and eyebrows sorted you can still tag me Janis: 🪒 Jimmy: 😍 Janis: you deserve a treat too, like Jimmy: I'm just pleased to see you, soz Jimmy: 🚫🔪🔨🔧🪓 Janis: don't worry, santa is coming through for me later Janis: 🤞 for ☣️ Janis: 🥴🤤🤮💀👻 Jimmy: 💰 on your man having a flask of socially acceptable poison Janis: yeah, give him the rosy red cheeks that complete the lewk Janis: nose that looks like a 🍓 Jimmy: that there's the only treat I need 🤤 Janis: 😂 Jimmy: [show up so these bubs can meet and start a lifelong friendship] Janis: [Libi just like bonjour, what are you going to ask Santa for, I'm gonna ask for this and this] Jimmy: [we know Bobby wants art supplies and a camera and we know why lol cue an eye roll from Jimothy as if he isn't buzzing to be loved] Janis: [no pretending that's not adorable, like, just like WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE COLOUR CRAYON] Jimmy: [okay but imagine him taking a crayon from behind his ear where jimothy keeps 🚬] Janis: [imagine, Janis just 😏 above their heads like not encouraging bad habits or nothing] Jimmy: [jimmy just looking to see if it's black like his soul or blood red and tutting when it obvs isn't either of those] Janis: [shakes head like what have you been teaching him tbh, Libi saying hers is that bluey silver colour like her mum's hair and we oop] Jimmy: [Bobby just like I don't have a mum anymore cos kids don't give a fuck and Jimmy just like so glad I get to sign this] Janis: [just literally like gurl same! 'cos neither of you can tell a child to shut the fuck up lmao 'my mummy and daddy are dead, what happened to your mum?'] Jimmy: [Bobby just like 'she went away' because we truly know not] Janis: [just like fantastic, so glad we came, bet he's thrilled he invited us now, 'cos we're not even looking, just walking in total silence, meanwhile Libi like oh okay 'If she comes back, I can see her' and then moving on chatting about our dog and what we're getting her for Christmas] Jimmy: [Bobby just like 'my dad's about but you wouldn't want to meet him' and doing an impression of Ian's angry face and then telling her all about Twix because dogs 5ever, making Jimothy give him his phone to show Libi pics of this pup] Janis: ['my granddad could fight him' when you're like Libi shh that's not nice but at least that is amusing as a prospect, also clearly doing a phone swap 'cos you'd have that Killer queen content on yours, Libi being like 'Janis knows loads about dogs and has taught her loads of tricks because she used to be a naughty girl and wee everywhere and eat everyone's shoes' and loling] Jimmy: [Bobby just dangerously close to outting Jimmy's secrets by telling her that he fights Ian sometimes so casual so nbd and then telling her about how Cass did that dog walk the other day and going on and on about how naughty Twix is and all the things she's done] Janis: [JJ y'all gotta pick them up and run so you can shove breakfast in their gobs like nooooooooo 'you're so lucky you've got a brother AND a sister, even though your brother's old too' looking at Jimmy and shaking her head in disdain because that's the age of her aunties and stuff and kids have no concept of age they treat you like you're ancient but at least that's a joke we've had so Janis managing to look at Jimmy like lol, she knows your secret] Jimmy: [the most half hearted 😏 but we're a bit more amused when Bobby starts dragging Cass by doing an impression of how angry she is and stomping about etc as if she's worse than Ian] Janis: [she's cackling in that way babby's do 'you're funny, you're my new friend'] Jimmy: [Bobby is buzzing and we're using Jimothy's phone to have a selfie sesh but also take artsy pics of our new bff as we go along] Janis: [run along you innocent children, like you've not just revealed so much, god bless] Jimmy: [JJ just awkwardly af walking in silence now thanks kids] Janis: [going to apologize like several times but you can't even, where would you begin lmao, pretend it's chill] Jimmy: [chuck some snow at her or like shake a tree branch full of it onto her or something, any distraction will do] Janis: [fall into the safety of that] Jimmy: [if nothing else he's good at that when things are awkward] Janis: [likewise, when we sit down for this breakfast, you can do all the posting thus far] Jimmy: [cheers to the fans for that distraction, meanwhile Jimmy and Bobby can teach Libi some easy signing since we're BFFs and gonna be seeing more of you undoubtedly baby hen] Janis: [lucky for you gal, perks of being but a child, she'd love that 'cos mini nerd and she'll be able to pick it up as most nurseries now do makaton so it's a way into learning it] Jimmy: [at least the bubs are having a lovely time until Santa breaks Bobby's heart by not knowing any] Janis: [truly, a day of drama and stress when you're just trying to do something nice, if that don't sum up xmas] Jimmy: [the tea honey, at least that'll be easy to smooth over like the people I work with are dickheads as well boy, that ain't the real Santa's fault] Janis: [it happens a lot 'cos the shopping centre ones freak kids out rightly so, Libi just blowing raspberries at him like understand this loser 'cos we're a baby bad bitch] Jimmy: [I stan Libi and the way she'll protect him and make him less shy, cos you know we're doing it too after she has and didn't get shouted at lol] Janis: [you've got your prezzies kids, fuck him up, just tugging on Jimmy's sleeve and loudly being like 'What's sign for poopoo head?' 'cos the age hen] Jimmy: [obvs we're showing her and we're not sorry, Jimothy is a bad bitch too okay] Janis: [we're just calling everyone a poopoo head all day now, which I imagine is quite visually obvious because the swears etc usually are] Jimmy: [that has cheered everyone greatly thanks Libi] Janis: [you are a funny egg, at least, hence we can't be mad at you/ignore you because what is that achieving, 'tis not your fault Edie is dead luv] Jimmy: [and Edie wouldn't want that like you can be anti Ruster having her because she wouldn't want that obvs] Janis: [make that the hill and we lowkey ignore everyone else rn, at least in comparison to how everything was before, so it's fine lol, think we are gonna get y'all presents that don't suck and I think you should get pups and name them] Jimmy: [keeping them forever, you cannot destroy them Twix or Killer thank you] Janis: [keep 'em safe, lads, I think you should call yours Star, 'cos huskies are that silvery grey colour too and the names work well together because obviously your dogs are BFFs too] Jimmy: [aw Snow & Star 4ever] Janis: [making Janis make the dogs do little tricks for y'all and then cackling again when she makes 'em poo on Libi's head] Jimmy: [love this so much, also can't forget Jimmy giving Janis the 🎨 which can be when the bubs have their real 🎁 cos fuck you Santa] Janis: [we know she genuinely appreciates them honey, we're always excited to see what he's done] Jimmy: [god knows because he blatantly did it last night after she left/early this morning even before this convo started because never sleep well so] Janis: [you know Libi is gonna be all over that hun like SHOW ME and then being like draw me draw me to Jimmy and Bobby] Jimmy: [they shall honey because we love an art sesh] Janis: [the confidence of a child, just posing here with the dogs] Jimmy: [never change gal never lose it] Janis: [we're clearly making Janis too, then shouting out increasingly complicated things, like, make the dogs pull us on a sleigh, make us flying, like gal, your dreams lol] Jimmy: [Jimothy will never back down from a challenge, he's got you bub] Janis: [don't stress out poor Bobby though, at least you not a rude ass bitch so you wouldn't shade his attempt] Jimmy: [it'd be a cute attempt, BFF status cemented] Janis: [can put up these pics for extra cuteness, hoes will DIE] Jimmy: [I wish we actually had some but alas] Janis: [never be as good as our imagination anyway] Jimmy: [true, is there anything else we wanna have them do before he has to go back to work?] Jimmy: [could go to the park maybe because it's right by his house and thus mcvickers] Janis: [that's a good way to end this day for you kiddos, could also get the dogs which would make them lowkey hysterical with happiness so pop off] Jimmy: [love that cos we know Cass has probably walked the other dogs while they've been out for that cash so no time to take Twix] Janis: [live ya life, get ya things, but now you gotta go to work and we gotta] Janis: Thanks for today, reckon they both enjoyed themselves 👍✔ Jimmy: you're alright, were going any road and I reckon he had a better time with her about Janis: they were cute Janis: and she lives at my nan and granddads so if he wants to hang more, easy done Jimmy: 👍✔ Janis: Yeah Janis: well she doesn't always talk about her dead mum and dad so it shouldn't be a big thing Janis: sorry Jimmy: it weren't a big thing to him Jimmy: nowt for you to be sorry for Janis: It weirds plenty of kids out Janis: I could've warned you, I guess Jimmy: loads of kids reckon he's weird Jimmy: Asia's sister included Janis: some front when you look like your ma fucked a cheese grater Jimmy: her dad weren't at the nativity, might be 'cause he were stuck in a drawer, yeah Janis: dunno if she's got one any more Janis: 💀👑 flex Jimmy: what, like she fucked and ate him? Janis: 🐰🥕 Jimmy: #fated Janis: 💔 they didn't think so Jimmy: 💔 I can't change the station to Classic FM for them 🎻s Janis: Perils of 🎅🎄🎁☃️ Jimmy: ❌🎅 that shithead's 💀💀💀 to us Janis: yeah Janis: and his tunes are shit Jimmy: don't even care how fit that 🍓 were looking Jimmy: SO over him and his 👃 babes Janis: better off without him Janis: you can do SO much better Jimmy: 🖋 us a joke about him being a ho ho HOE Janis: I'll hit up the group chat Janis: their level of humour Jimmy: 🥇💡 Janis: and one of them has always just been dumped so they'll comiserate with you Jimmy: tah huns Janis: nothing if not the BEST friends to have Jimmy: DUH! Only time I'll accept 🥈 Janis: charming that is 😏 Jimmy: I get it 🎅 were a right let down, you need some 💕 Janis: just a bit rude that you're so gracious with them Jimmy: Baby Janis: Such a pisstake Jimmy: their BFF status, yeah Janis: you Jimmy: why me? Janis: you just are Jimmy: you can take it Janis: true Jimmy: I know, that'll be why I said it Janis: we're alright, yeah? Janis: I don't think shit needs to be weird just 'cos 2 kids have got no filter Jimmy: don't it feel like we're alright to you? Janis: it was a bit awkward Janis: but I'm over it if you are Jimmy: nowt to be over from where I'm serving overpriced ☕ Jimmy: just the unpaid translator earlier, me, none of my business what they were going on about Jimmy: if you wanna tell me something, up to you, that Janis: alright Janis: works for me Jimmy: she's world class at signing, won't need me after a bit, any road Janis: bit of a third-wheel Janis: cramp his style with your 🤓 Jimmy: *😎 Jimmy: but alright 🖍 are cooler than 🚬 give him that Janis: gonna usurp you in every way, for sure Jimmy: go on then, what's your fave colour 🖍 ? Janis: the important questions Janis: don't know why it's taken you so long Jimmy: tell me Jimmy: edge of the seat I ain't allowed to put my arse near til my next break Janis: 🎻😞 Janis: goldenrod or inchworm obvs Jimmy: gonna do your next 🎨 in them so 🤞 you took it serious Janis: it's 💛💚 so I'm gonna look like a keylime pie Jimmy: never said I were drawing you, bighead Janis: you will be though Jimmy: not gonna now for the sake of Janis: 1. I know you're tired, grumpy 2. How will they know it's goals??? Jimmy: 1. Bollocks 2. everything I touch turns to #goals, nowt I could do wrong Janis: 1. s'fair, you've been an unpaid translator, an artiste, santa and now barista boy who can't sit down 2. alright, if you want to add Midas to the CV but might be a bit much Jimmy: now I've got your permission I'll draw some eyes on 😎 and grab a quick kip 👍 tah for that, Jillian Jimmy: ❌ that off the CV though, noted Janis: it's fair but life and working a minimum wage job for your living ain't Janis: keep 💭 though and I'll let you focus on it and the overpriced ☕ Jimmy: where's your focus going? Janis: need to get another minimum wage job I can do sitting down so you don't take it over/ban me Jimmy: you were hopping round less today, that just for the kid's benefit or were you 💭 about keeping me out of pocket with a full recovery, like? Janis: 💭 about keeping you out the loop and pretending it's permanent Janis: have you munchausened me or am I munchausening you Janis: real question #2 Jimmy: well done on telling me that plan then Janis: Yeah, you know Janis: when you've pissed off who's gonna carry me about Jimmy: 🎅 Jimmy: you're heavy but not sack of 🎁 heavy Janis: true Janis: he's 💪 Janis: oh well, problem sorted then 👋 Jimmy: Lucas is a poor man's version an' all he'd be alright for a few lifts Jimmy: I'll race back for the funeral, obvs Janis: don't Janis: he actually offered me a lift once after a match and it was very awkward Janis: definitely not meant to do that, but he's a maverick, you know Jimmy: did you offer to take a lit match to his car or what? Janis: I'm not as witty as Libi Janis: but I did get detention for a week, which is funny as, like what you saying for? 'cos I didn't wanna get sexually assaulted and dumped in a ditch? Janis: 💩💩🧠 Jimmy: Stockholm syndrome only works for dickheads like me on dickheads like you 💔 for him Janis: 'scuse me? Jimmy: can't ⛓ you to a desk nowhere but in his dreams Jimmy: could've childlocked you into his motor but his lack of 🥇🗨 pissed on that Janis: If there was anything in his plan for me, might've worked Janis: but I'm not arsed about straight As Janis: 🤞 he tried Mia next Jimmy: she does look like she just crawled out a ditch Jimmy: dunno if we can score him any credit for that though Janis: just the #aesthetic babes Janis: try and look a bit buzzing when they come in, 'cos they will Janis: no need to 💔 them about 🎅 when you can act like it was the best time ever Jimmy: 😒 just my face, nowt personal, Mia Janis: NOT pleased to see her 🔧🔨🧨🪓🔪 Jimmy: I'll fake it if she fakes not being a Scrooge Janis: no need to go that far Jimmy: if you can't be a slag for tips at christmas, when can you, eh? Janis: 🙄😏 Jimmy: Oi, dead serious question, that Janis: I don't do your schedule Janis: though maybe I'll pop a CV in Janis: better or worse than step-mum nightmares? 🤔 Jimmy: Depends Janis: on? Jimmy: you gonna leave the ☕🎨 to me or are we making 🎄🍆 happen? Janis: 1. the #goals answer is the cup ain't big enough to do it justice, alright 2. if you were as good a teacher as Lucas, I might be better but most importantly 3. gonna be your manager, I'll never be there let alone ever make ☕s Jimmy: got it all figured out, you Jimmy: be piss easy for you to answer my next dead serious question Janis: yeah, aside for my total lack of experience for the role, well in Janis: so go on Jimmy: I were just thinking are we too 👰💍🤵? 👵💕👴 ain't #goals unless we're chatting my personal Janis: too domestic, you mean? Jimmy: we've done 👶🐕 if there ain't a christmas eve eve party I'll lose the 🤏 of faith I had in paddy teen humanity Janis: there's always parties Janis: it probably is time to hit another one up Jimmy: nowt to do with Ian clocking off for 🎄 and TOTALLY to do with me being chuffed to bits to give the fans what they're after Janis: 🙌 Janis: worth celebrating, I get it Jimmy: 🍾 Janis: as much as it pains me, I can't say I can't make it Janis: so sure, put in an appearance Jimmy: I get it 💔 you can't dance Jimmy: 🦶🎻🎻 Janis: at least I have an excuse Jimmy: me an' all, it's being a white northern lad Janis: 😂 Janis: I meant an excuse not to be ground on by randomers but yeah Jimmy: still works Janis: 💔💔 Jimmy: don't worry, I'll do my 😭 for pity tips, nowt you need to see Janis: if you're going that kind of party Janis: don't need to invite me Jimmy: I'll tell Doris to chuck her cardi on 💕 she'll love a bit of that Janis: unsurprised Janis: dirty bitch Jimmy: 😍😍 Janis: 🤢 Jimmy: green is right Janis: ha Janis: obviously Jimmy: whatever party we're going to, I will need a slaggy 🤶 ootd Janis: Penneys will have one you can pick up Jimmy: owt you want? Janis: not a fake beard Janis: ❌🎅 Jimmy: already got one of them in me Janis: fuck off Jimmy: in a bit then, Ellen Janis: you aren't funny Jimmy: still working on the 🤹 me Jimmy: ☕☕☕☕☕ Janis: keep at it Jimmy: they're here, should I invite 'em to this party or what? Janis: depends Jimmy: ? Janis: do you want an actual night off or do you wanna have to do #goals shit Jimmy: you heard, can do goals shit without trying Jimmy: do you want a night off? Janis: I asked you first Jimmy: so answer me first Janis: 🙄 Janis: I've had enough time off Janis: my ankle is better Jimmy: alright Janis: so answer Jimmy: I did Janis: Bitch, where Jimmy: I said alright Jimmy: I can do it Janis: no need to tax yourself Jimmy: piss off Janis: I'll go home and decorate mine Jimmy: 👌 Janis: don't invite them and you can actually have a decent time Jimmy: where? it's still a shit party full of dickheads Janis: it's your night off Jimmy: 🙄 Janis: you can't think of a single fun thing to do? Jimmy: if I ain't on your clock I'm on another Jimmy: 👶🐕 Janis: you said your dad was off Janis: is that not the entire point Jimmy: the entire point were I don't wanna be there, not that I don't have to be Jimmy: nowt #goals about pissing about for the sake of Jimmy: if you don't need me to be 🏆 they do Janis: if you don't wanna be there, then don't Janis: it doesn't make any odds if we're being #goals or not Janis: like your dad is really invested Jimmy: nowt I do is for that prick's benefit, didn't reckon that needed spelling out an' all Janis: that's my point Janis: do it for yourself Janis: don't need to pretend you're doing me a massive favour to warrant it Jimmy: what's it doing for me if I ain't? Janis: I don't know Janis: some peace and quiet Janis: time to fucking breathe Jimmy: you heard me, where? Jimmy: tisn't the season, mate Janis: for fuck's sake Janis: I never said I had all the answers for you Jimmy: don't have a go at me just 'cause I ain't chuffed at the prospect of becoming a ⛄ walking the streets of this shithole taking deep breaths or some bollocks Janis: you stop having a go at me first and we'll be quits Janis: sorry I don't have any top ideas of what you can do Janis: if I did we wouldn't need to bother with this bullshit Jimmy: 👍 Janis: whatever Jimmy: tah for that Janis: just piss off and do some work Jimmy: going against your night off stance but alright Jimmy: not the hill you wanna 💀💀💀 on Janis: whatever you're gonna do, you're still on the 🕡 right now Jimmy: weren't reckoning I had this apron on 'cause it makes me look even more fit and mysterious Jimmy: just a bonus, that Janis: funny Jimmy: come to the party with me, dickhead Janis: you're so frustrating Jimmy: how else you gonna prove to me your ankle is better and get your 🐕🏃💰 back? Jimmy: come on Janis: alright Jimmy: alright Janis: I thought you wanted to go alone Jimmy: what for? Janis: be off my 🕡 Jimmy: this is the easiest job I've got Jimmy: and before you start, NOT saying you are Janis: I'm not starting nothing Janis: it just pisses me off when you act like it's all my idea, or I wanna do it Janis: it's mutually beneficial, that's the point Janis: and the rest of them are the ones 👀 & 💬 Janis: not me Jimmy: it were my idea, I ain't forgotten that or why it's a 🥇 Jimmy: I'm a mardy prick, can't fake that I ain't all the time Janis: I'll survive Jimmy: I'll make it up to you Janis: don't need to Jimmy: but we both need Ian's stash more than him Janis: not gonna argue with that Jimmy: mutually beneficial, I heard you Janis: he can enjoy some sober family fun Janis: I'm not going to enjoy any party if I'm not at least a bit buzzed Jimmy: you can be pissed as 💀#2 were by round 2 of that game if you want, used to carrying you by now Janis: considering how much we've eat today Janis: literally impossible Jimmy: 💔 I can't accept that challenge 'cause I ain't no lightweight Jimmy: feels wrong turning one down Janis: what else is a party for Janis: be loads of others to 🥇 Jimmy: quick, give me one I can do now before I vanish 👻👋 Janis: 🤔🤔 hmm Janis: I don't know much about this ☕😍 life Janis: but how many non-dairy orders can you 🐄 up before any of 'em notice and complain Janis: trusting you not to bullshit, dickhead Jimmy: I swear on our kid's fake 🐕 Janis: hope the real one ain't savaged poor snow Janis: will be all your fault, obvs Jimmy: sounds like her, that Jimmy: and me getting the blame'd be about right an' all Jimmy: 🤞🤞 Janis: Poor baby Jimmy: you better mean me Janis: 'course I mean you Jimmy: know what you're like 🐕💕 Janis: didn't even buy myself one, firstly Janis: and secondly, you know you're 🥇 don't be jealous Jimmy: I'd have nicked you one but 👀 and 👂 already got our sticking a 🖍 behind his Jimmy: no need to turn 'em into baby Bonnie and Clyde Janis: thank god he's cute Janis: or it'd be baby borstal Janis: use the disability card and there's nothing he can't do 😎🖍 Jimmy: and then it'd be baby 👻 'cause he'd never hack that Janis: 🥺 Janis: got that from you and all Jimmy: how much bollocks were yours 🗨? Janis: I know you're gutted she got your number Janis: 👴 Jimmy: shut up Jimmy: is there owt you can do for our real 🐕 or what? Janis: Oh Janis: well, yeah Janis: that's the side hussle 'cos the rich cunts who cba to walk their own dogs also cba to train 'em, oddly enough Jimmy: it's too 💰💰💰 for us poor lads then Janis: not necessarily Janis: need the funds myself so we can do 💰 and a favour Jimmy: if you're 💭 mates rates he weren't 🗨 bollocks about how 😈🐕 it is Janis: it can't be worse than that thing was Janis: Killer ain't a funny nickname 'cos it was so 😇 Jimmy: might have to be a big favour, all I'm saying Janis: if you can't afford it Jimmy: made 2 🐄☕ with no 🤬 or 💩 already, be alright Janis: 🤞 Jimmy: 🤝? Janis: you don't want to hear what favour I might want? Janis: brave Janis: but a deal Jimmy: I ain't scared of giving you owt you might want, Jules Janis: Good Jimmy: 👍 Janis: be a really boring party otherwise Jimmy: can't have that Janis: would be gutted Janis: and I do owe you for all the kid time today Jimmy: #notallsantas Jimmy: you'll get no 💔 off me Janis: not what I want Janis: but I did miss being alone with you Janis: I know she's a lot Jimmy: she's alright Janis: she's just a kid Janis: she don't know no better Jimmy: 🥈 to 😎🖍 obvs but I rate her as kids go Janis: duh, that 💕🥇 is mutual Jimmy: he's got no mates here yet, it were a 🏆 day for him Janis: I'm glad Janis: she liked him too Janis: wouldn't shut up Jimmy: he's probs still going on to my sister an' all Janis: gonna owe her something now Janis: probably a bit better than a cuddly 🐕 Jimmy: she's done alright out of the 🐕🏃💰 she'll live Janis: she don't need to re-cripple me for the gig Janis: plenty of 🐕🏃💰 to go 'round, don't need to be 14 for that Jimmy: she'll be 💔 you don't wanna 🥊 but yeah Jimmy: she can't be arsed to do ours but I don't blame her when it's Ian's 💰 Janis: I don't make it a habit 👶🍭 Jimmy: brb gotta @ her that fighting 🗨 Janis: such a shit-stirrer Janis: it's alright, not tryna be your new step-mum, don't need to parent-trap me Jimmy: it's called making coffee when it's my 9-5, babe Janis: 😂 get him some chalk he's had an 💭💡 Jimmy: can do my 🐄☕ tally an' all Janis: make your least fave colleague clean the bogs today Jimmy: whoever the lad is you said you liked ✔ Janis: 😨 Jimmy: 😏 Janis: trying to turn everyone against me, I 👀 Janis: only going to have to make it up to him, think on Jimmy: not if I do first 😘 Janis: 🐍 Jimmy: bit of editing that's a 🍆📏 compliment Janis: UGH Janis: bastard Jimmy: 😂 Janis: you always go on about just the tip so Janis: can't confirm nor deny ladies 💁🙊 Jimmy: one way to get me to do nudes Janis: Eurgh, don't Janis: I'll hype you up in the tweets, fine Jimmy: go on then Janis: alright Janis: [least subtle posts ever 'cos a challenge] Jimmy: [cue a flirting via socials sesh because love that for you two always] Janis: [always a mood] Janis: so goals Jimmy: Where do you reckon 💀👑 is on the scale? Janis: 😠 Janis: but if she does come to this party Janis: 🤬 potential Jimmy: but you ain't factored in she can see my 😍 IRL Jimmy: have another go Janis: 😡 Janis: so festive of her Janis: #2 bringing the 🤢 Jimmy: proud of you Janis: Babe 😊😌 Janis: are they all there? Jimmy: yeah Janis: wow ✨ miracles never cease 🙄 Jimmy: 👀 🛍 about to go ask if there's owt for us Janis: real 🎅 right there Jimmy: gonna pretend I can't understand her answer Jimmy: if that other dickhead can get away with it Janis: 😏 Jimmy: Where's Libi when I need her? Janis: she could rinse them Jimmy: I'd dip into the tip jar to see it Janis: too bad she's probably having her tea right now Janis: downsides of being 4 Jimmy: can't promise her owt better off this menu Janis: sounds like too much excitement for one day Janis: my nan'll be fuming Jimmy: I'll be round to make it up to her in a bit 🦷🌹🦷 Janis: no tah, Romeo Jimmy: spoilsport Janis: you wanted an outfit, I'm out 👀 🛍 Jimmy: watch your 🦶 in the stampede Janis: it's mental Janis: 🥊 for the bargains Jimmy: do you a 🥊 alongside my 🐄☕ Jimmy: high scores over here Janis: you're on Jimmy: 🖋👂 til my next break Janis: cute Jimmy: Bill's 👻 on at me to write you a sonnet Janis: how many did he crack out? Janis: so many hoes Jimmy: I'd ask but he's flirting now Jimmy: never takes a break, him Janis: Oh Bill Janis: the slutty friend in this sitcom Jimmy: *romcom Janis: so soz Jimmy: 😘 Janis: can't believe how cliche this shit is and we're still getting new fans Jimmy: just that good Janis: thanks, I am Jimmy: said it before Jimmy: as a muse, you're 🥇 Janis: you're not so bad yourself Jimmy: I'll aim my 😳 at their table, tah for the MASSIVE compliment Janis: I could do better but Jimmy: ? Janis: maybe it'll make me 😳 Jimmy: you're in hell, there's your excuse Jimmy: *🥵 Janis: I already know what we're gonna do at this party and honestly, I would've come even if you didn't want me to Janis: 'til you you did Jimmy: will you come here? Janis: yes Jimmy: 🚫🏃 Janis: okay Janis: but now, yeah? Jimmy: what kind of question is that? Janis: One I want you to answer Jimmy: one you know the answer to Jimmy: 'course now Janis: 👍 Janis: hold on Jimmy: I don't care if they're still here, that's not why Janis: No? Jimmy: I'll still want you here when they've pissed off Janis: I know Janis: I wanna be there Janis: you know, with you Jimmy: I know it gets a bit Jimmy: what I mean and don't Jimmy: what's for them and what's for you Janis: headfuck Janis: but we both knew that Jimmy: yeah Janis: I can handle it Jimmy: I wouldn't have picked you if I didn't reckon you could Janis: not a total bastard Jimmy: just 🤏 Janis: I like it Jimmy: obvs, your type is 🎅 Janis: 💩heads? Janis: maybe Jimmy: works for me Janis: [show up gal] Jimmy: [have an epic makeout sesh in front of all these shoppers going past and the gals inside 👀🍿 through the huge windows] Janis: [you've earnt it] Jimmy: [and Mia always deserves to be fuming] Janis: [very true honey, we know you and Pablo is all but over now] Jimmy: [he won't have bought you any goals gifts, what are you gonna do buy them yourself and imply they are from him? awkward] Janis: [didn't come to your friendmas even though you told him to, he's not serving his purpose hen] Jimmy: [notp in every sense] Janis: [we been knew, bye gals, we aren't remotely thinking about you rn] Jimmy: [lowkey never are, you're a flimsy excuse at most huns] Janis: [one we don't need currently] Jimmy: [are you coming in when his break is over or are you off again gal?] Janis: [we're coming in 'cos he asked you to stay] Jimmy: [we'll make you food you actually wanna eat, it's been ages since breakfast] Janis: [just try and find somewhere to perch and chill] Jimmy: [we'll do you the favour of saying Mia made the gals storm past you mid makeout or whatever so you don't have to sit with them] Janis: [lmao imagine, bring your festive spirit down more than the kids chatting up a storm earlier lmao] Jimmy: [that's the last thing we need, he'd get in trouble by letting you sit in the staff area before he made you share their table lol] Janis: [should do that, you know his managers long gone for xmas lol] Jimmy: [honestly go ahead gal we haven't done any of the getting in trouble stuff yet so his record is spotless rn] Janis: [us 😈 lmao] Jimmy: 👍? Janis: 👍 Janis: like what you've done with the place Jimmy: it were a bit more 🎄 but some dickhead nicked loads of it Janis: shocking Janis: some people have no shame Jimmy: if you reckon that's bad, you'll never get your head round how some people spend their 🚬 breaks, Judith Jimmy: enough to make you 😳 Janis: The people with holes and ink all over their body have bad habits? 😱 Janis: will not hear of it Jimmy: SO pure 😇 Janis: you had a costume change of 💘? Jimmy: that one's gotta be yours, Tiny Tim, for seeing the good in everyone's 💘 Janis: cheers for not calling me a 🐷 anymore, I guess Jimmy: you're welcome 🐸 Janis: 😏 Janis: don't fancy eating flies though Jimmy: Dunno if I could keep faking 😍 for you and your new diet Janis: it is a big ask Janis: wonder if I can convince the gals it's the new thing though Jimmy: nowt more #goals than a lad who'll pick flies out of his 🦷🦷 for you Jimmy: they'll FINALLY know their 💕 is real Janis: Beautiful, truly Jimmy: I'll pass it on to Bill's 👻 Janis: bit rude that he's not solely focused on our story Jimmy: *I'll 👻🥊 Janis: hot Jimmy: that's the ☕ I'm 🤹 Janis: I couldn't actually work here Jimmy: I couldn't actually have you work here Janis: fight for the tips too real Janis: I get it Jimmy: that'll do for why Janis: go on Jimmy: what? Janis: give me the bulletpoints Jimmy: you're alright 🤓 Janis: tah, babe Jimmy: and I'm alright for not 🖋 you a naughty list Jimmy: which you know were what I meant Janis: you're 🤹 Janis: I know Janis: can't blame me for trying Jimmy: you heard me #notallsantas Jimmy: don't wanna watch you sleep either, tah Janis: I appreciate you saying that Janis: don't sound at all like you're gonna Jimmy: 👀 Janis: thank god the sleepover didn't happen Janis: you and 💀👑 meet over my corpse Jimmy: I'll sort a new one since you're 💔 Janis: with who? Jimmy: I'm just the 💪🏆 Jimmy: up to you, that Janis: 🎅👴😎☕ Janis: party Jimmy: and what, we all chuck our 🔑s in a bowl? Jimmy: or just pass you around Janis: UM Janis: how dare you, we do face masks and watch movies Jimmy: 🥱😴 Janis: 😱😱 BABES Janis: 😭 Jimmy: SOZ Janis: you are SO uninvited from the gangbang now Jimmy: 😭😭😭 Janis: it's me who's a 🍆 down Janis: you're so selfish Jimmy: if you've still got that 🪒 it's easily sorted Janis: bit rapey Janis: 😎☕ is basically an open invitation in this place Jimmy: no need to just castrate me with your 🗨 Jimmy: there's my consent Janis: you aren't bleeding out yet Janis: sorry Jimmy: I'll stop it with the steam wand Janis: ooh Janis: resourceful Jimmy: Oi, don't sound so surprised, dickhead Janis: I didn't expect you to have really considered castration that much, tbh Janis: but yes 💪🧠 Jimmy: never gonna unlock all my kinks with that attitude Janis: 😂 Janis: you're keeping the list 🔒 Jimmy: when you're ready for it, I'll give you the bulletpoints Janis: How am I not ready for it? Jimmy: you're here for a start Jimmy: what are we gonna do get a wet floor sign out and stick a 🧹 through the door handle? Janis: are we going to do that? Jimmy: that on your list? Janis: Well, it is now Jimmy: good, 'cause we ain't gonna have time to do more than the one ✔ before Doris is kicking off for her ☕ or invite Janis: She can wait Janis: I don't want to share you right now Jimmy: [showing up for �� antics because his manager ain't here and we don't care what our co-workers think] Janis: [live your best lives guys there is no reason not to] Jimmy: [Pete if you're here ILY and you would do the exact same with your gf so but fuck the rest of y'all truly] Janis: [maybe not exactly the same if you're a little less extra but yes, we aren't interested] Jimmy: [you're a bit older and chiller but you know] Janis: [soz you aren't living a romcom lmao god bless] Jimmy: [JJ out here doing the most and living their dreams from day 1] Janis: [we just skirting around our trauma and trying to live and be young and I love that for you] Jimmy: [literally imagine just having to go back to work like 👋 in a bit as if that didn't just happen I always die thinking about stuff like this] Janis: [lol your life, hence I think you should go back out shopping for a bit girl 'til he's ready to leave] Jimmy: [thank god you're both shameless because even though nobody would've heard anything with the christmas tunes and how busy it is, everyone totally knows] Janis: [y'all aren't subtle, enjoy the #bants and/or disgust from your coworkers Jimothy soz] Jimmy: [making friends everywhere he goes, you're welcome for the fact you're gonna get sacked from here because you're not leaving Dublin in a hot sec like you think you are] Janis: [you're all teens/young adults, y'all be getting messy in all the ways, don't judge lol] Jimmy: [mhmm and we know the kinda hipster peeps who be working there ain't it so shhh] Janis: that girl with the pink hair and neck tat gave me the biggest evils Jimmy: it's just her face Jimmy: 😒 part of our uniform Jimmy: and her hair's rose gold, very festive of her, get it right Janis: roots down to her eyebrows and all Janis: tell your girlfriend she's safe it's #fake Jimmy: oh Ashleeeee Jimmy: I'll tell her to get down the salon Janis: or stick a santa hat on Janis: problem solved if she covers her face with it too Jimmy: she'd probably make a better ☕ blind an' all Janis: you're 🥇 are you? Jimmy: you're asking questions you know the answer to again Janis: I don't drink it, I can't comment Jimmy: it weren't a #humblebrag she's a 🎄 temp, can't do fuck all but 😒 and gone before her roots'll reach her chin Janis: makes sense Janis: least you can blame the 🐄☕ on her Jimmy: except 💀👑 and co's, reckon they'll know that were me, if they ever know Janis: none of them are asking for no 🐄 'cos it makes them shit their brains out Janis: but that extra 1/8 lbs will give it away 😣 😖 😫 😩 🥺 😢 😭 😤 😠 😡 🤬 🤯 Jimmy: if it made 'em 💩 they'd ask for it, hoard the laxatives for another day, I get it Janis: True Janis: 🙄 Jimmy: soz if you find any 💩 in the changing rooms though, mate Jimmy: 🐄☕ well into double figures Janis: that's just any other day for Penney's Janis: but I'll sign your name if you like Jimmy: Tah Janis: gold sharpie Janis: make it festive Jimmy: just like that, going from muse to artist, you Janis: A ⭐ is born Janis: don't ruin it for me when I get my grammy and you're an alcoholic Jimmy: nowt fake about their 💕 Jimmy: if you don't go that hard for me when my missus, Ashlee is front row, you ain't having that oscar Janis: 😏 Janis: only to catch her 😒 on camera Jimmy: bollocks, in it for the 👏👏🌹👏 you Janis: you're just in it to be serenaded so don't @ me mate Jimmy: not denying it Janis: 😍 x1000 Jimmy: owt to give me a break from these fucking 🎄🎵 Janis: reckon the staff here have gone full zombie Janis: 💀 in the 👀 and 🧠 Jimmy: bit rude of you not to leave me for 💀💀💀 back there Jimmy: could be us rotting but you're playing 💔 Janis: Rosie was gonna passive-aggressively ask me to buy something or leave if I didn't Jimmy: taking orders from her'll do nowt for them gay rumours Jimmy: need a #LAD to tell you what to do, duh Jimmy: I'll give you a shout when I find one Janis: Shut up, s'why I left before she could say fuck all Janis: and how are there gonna be any gay rumours when the reason she's pissed off is 'cos she's jealous Jimmy: depends who she's jealous of Janis: if she's gay that's her problem Janis: but she's jealous of me, FYI Janis: take the compliment Jimmy: don't sound like me, that Jimmy: you're the 👏👏🌹👏 chaser Janis: 1. rude 2. bollocks Jimmy: 1. ain't much of a compliment if she fancies me 2. I'll have you know my head's genetically this big Janis: you know what you look like and you're well 😏 about it Janis: not saying you're wrong Jimmy: I know what she looks like an' all Janis: not like she's the only one 😍 is it Jimmy: my inbox is as full as yours Janis: yeah Jimmy: so you've got nowt to be jealous of Janis: I'm not jealous Jimmy: what then? Janis: I'm just saying she is Janis: fuck sake big head, don't get it twisted Jimmy: don't get a mard on Janis: I'm not, idiot Jimmy: 👌 Janis: Are you? Jimmy: ? Janis: in a mood? Jimmy: why would I be? Janis: I don't know Janis: why would I be, like Jimmy: 😒 ain't in your job description Janis: I'm not Janis: I only left so you could actually get some work done Janis: that's all Jimmy: alright Janis: don't actually care what your coworkers reckon but you do have to work with them Janis: least for a while longer Jimmy: I'll live Janis: it's about making shit easier Janis: not harder, yeah Jimmy: you did Jimmy: not saying I'm 😁👍 or nowt but Janis: not even a little? Janis: shit review, that Jimmy: you can have one of the dead eyed ones 😀 or 😃 Janis: I'd rather 😒 Jimmy: [a 😒 selfie like there you go ILY] Janis: tah Jimmy: I rate you, you know I do Janis: shh Jimmy: not gonna sing it but Janis: if we've got to be a romcom Janis: not being one with a musical number Jimmy: won't argue 🤐 Jimmy: #notallnortherners 🎭🩰🎤 Janis: you're warning me how embarrassing you're gonna be at this party Janis: I get it Jimmy: can't say you ain't been now Jimmy: #notalldaddys an' all Jimmy: dickhead dad if I'm owt Janis: however goals that may be Janis: I'd sooner grate my face off Jimmy: you always know EXACTLY what to say Jimmy: really fulfil my nursing kink, that will Janis: how great would you look if you stayed with me Janis: my only positive, gone Jimmy: Piss off Jimmy: be even more mysterious to make up for losing how fit you are Janis: 😶😶😶 Janis: what is she thinking Jimmy: 🤯🤯🤯 Janis: do you if you like Janis: #muteandcute Jimmy: the couple who self harms together are obvs gonna stay together Janis: 💀💀 means forever 😃😃 Jimmy: long as it don't backfire when everyone reckons I've been cracking onto Asia's dad 💋 Janis: reunite 'em for the holidays Janis: ✨💕 Jimmy: you're really earning that 😇 costume for tonight Janis: you'll still steal the show, babe Jimmy: you ARE the show, babe 👀🍿🔪 Jimmy: Ashleeeeeee's got nowt on 💀👑 Jimmy: or my long lens Janis: 😂 Janis: dope Jimmy: promise not to do you like princess di, know you'd hate everyone going on about you for that long Janis: what good is 👏👏🌹👏 if I can't 👂 Janis: obvs Jimmy: 👻 perks Jimmy: get to be a right nosy dickhead forever Janis: suits you Janis: no 🧛 perks except the taste Jimmy: 🦷🦷 suit you Jimmy: what about 💪🏆🏃🥇? Janis: that's just me Jimmy: SUCH an athlete Jimmy: I've heard Janis: I'll show you if you ever stop fussing and nursing Jimmy: BUT 🥺 Janis: I know Janis: but I need a redemption arc Jimmy: nowt wrong with 😈 Janis: falling on my arse though Janis: 👎 Jimmy: 👍 for me Jimmy: but I get it, you wanna impress me Janis: if I wanted to impress you, I just would Janis: it's easy Jimmy: 🗨 is Janis: you'll 👀 Jimmy: *📷 Janis: if you can catch me Jimmy: challenge accepted Janis: 💪 Jimmy: tah very much, compliment accepted an' all Janis: when you out? Jimmy: [a time which I hope isn't forever away because work sucks enough without your co-workers gossiping about your love life] Janis: 👍 Janis: might compliment you then Jimmy: you find a party? Janis: [a selection of, 'cos these teens are extra] Jimmy: we gonna #bless the one or do a tour? Janis: a tour is actually a good idea Janis: fuck it up Janis: go before it's really shit Jimmy: there you go again sounding 😱😱 that I've had a 🥇💡 Janis: like I'm meant to reckon every 💭 you have is golden Jimmy: glad we're on the same 📖 FINALLY Janis: 🙄 Janis: I'm on a whole new book, babes Jimmy: alright, give us a chance Jimmy: basically illiterate Janis: awh Janis: keep practising on those coffee cups hun Jimmy: good job I nicked our kid's 🖍 Janis: long as it weren't a swap Jimmy: @ nspcc Janis: you're alright Janis: this country is infamous for not giving a shit about kids Jimmy: that'll be why Ian brought us here Janis: if he tries to give you to some nuns, run Jimmy: into their arms #kinkunlocked Janis: sure that's another costume Janis: want an outfit change? Jimmy: not very festive though, is it? Jimmy: if I were the baby Jesus, that's one thing, but his groupies Janis: well you can't go as baby Jesus Janis: that's obscene Janis: and where am I getting a loincloth as this hour, thank you Jimmy: such a letdown, you Jimmy: seen you piss about and craft a 🐑 for fuck's sake, it's ALMOST like you DON'T WANT to make this happen for me Janis: it's almost like you're a complete exhibitionist Jimmy: Lucas would support me, knew I should've picked him Janis: no one's stopping you Jimmy: UGH and now you're not even gonna fight for me 😭😭 Janis: you'll come crawling back when he's trying to pick up more 12 year olds again Jimmy: less of a rom com more of a crimewatch reconstruction Janis: you, the clueless wife who had NO idea Janis: sure, Sharon Janis: turning a blind eye so you didn't have to fuck him Jimmy: chuffed he's pissing off out so I can watch telly without his loud breathing doing my head in Janis: You're an Emmerdale fan, definitely Janis: neighbours and home and away in the afternoons Jimmy: Doctors is my top pic though obvs Janis: your only friends are the characters in your stories Janis: sad, honestly Jimmy: Oi don't forget the 🐩 I'm starting to look like Jimmy: it hates me, obvs, so I get why you didn't 💭 Janis: it doesn't want you to baby it but it's all you wanted it for Jimmy: he won't put a 👶 in me and that's 💔 but OMG it's just like one of my fave plots #conflicted Janis: Sharon, you're barren Janis: you need to come to terms with it Jimmy: DUN DUN DUN Jimmy: but it's me doing my own piss poor drum roll Janis: 😂 meanwhile, casual serial killer b plot with your mans Jimmy: Sharon, you're having a mental breakdown Jimmy: this is a REAL doctor's office Janis: not you trying to seduce your fave doctor and it's actually your GP and he's gonna call the psych ward Jimmy: 🚨🚨🚨 Jimmy: your man is gonna pin his crimes on you, hun Janis: omg Janis: when the truth outs, you're gonna be fully gone Janis: maybe in a cheeky coma Jimmy: bit of amnesia so I reckon I did do it an' all Janis: oh god Janis: so like a woman Janis: just lethal inject me 'cos I'm a monster who can't even have kids Jimmy: Oh Sharon Janis: Lucas will keep getting away with it for 4 more seasons Janis: then your ghost will pop up and it'll all get sorted in an ep Jimmy: I'll work with the 👻s of his victims, grab a spin off out of it Janis: full circle, you watching your show from your armchair in your dark, depressing lounge Jimmy: 🎨 Janis: welcome for the A on your next art project Jimmy: IOU Janis: not bothered about credit Jimmy: alright, what do you want? Janis: 🤔 Jimmy: go on Janis: I need to think of an idea right now? Jimmy: 🚫⏲ Jimmy: just no need to hold back if you've already got one Janis: I'll take my time Janis: no point saying something now, thinking of something I want more later Jimmy: won't have you 🖋🩸 it's alright Jimmy: if you change your mind, just tell me that Janis: you're bad at business Jimmy: that'll be why I ain't the manager Janis: 💔 babe Janis: the free time you'd have 🤯🤯 Jimmy: could train my own 🐕 Janis: hey now Janis: that's my 💰 Jimmy: real 💔 Janis: in it for the 👏👏🌹👏💰💰 Jimmy: I got that Janis: 👍 Jimmy: 👍 Janis: hush Janis: got outfits to buy and christmas tunes to hear for the 42nd time today Jimmy: I won't serenade you then Janis: if you can get a christmas 🥇 then I will 👰💍🤵 for the royalties Jimmy: alright, piss off I need to crack on with that and you've got a 👰💍🤵 to plan Janis: 👋😘 Jimmy: 💕 Janis: [party time] Jimmy: [obvs we just want them to have a nice time but have you got anything specific in mind?] Janis: [hmm, obvs the main party is tomorrow, so we can be more chill, but we can also make drama if we want 'cos yolo] Jimmy: [I was thinking at one of the parties they hit they should see Mia cheating again cos Pablo is on the outs and also she just would anyway] Jimmy: [but that could be today or tomorrow like] Janis: [we should do today 'cos you ain't the focus tomorrow remotely hun, and it's just fun] Jimmy: [agreed, the focus tomorrow is being festive af as always, as much fluff as I can clutch with my grabby hands] Janis: [so if anything, get drama that isn't them, aka flat whites etc out tonight] Jimmy: [love it because Mia would think she was being so sneaky but we see you hen] Janis: [merry christmas beech] Jimmy: [gather that blackmail lads, you'll want it when she gets him sacked by being a Karen] Janis: [yep thanks for not before xmas at least] Jimmy: [I'm sure she's wishing she could rn] Janis: [too bad you walked out in disgust lmao it got so much worse] Jimmy: [sucks to suck gals] Janis: [what drama can we do with y'all hmm] Jimmy: [unrelated but can we say they're drunk in love enough that he stays at mcvickers because Ian sucks and we don't need that in our lives] Janis: [yes, just know the Libi is gonna come in in the AM to wake you up and out you lol] Jimmy: [ngl LOVE that even if you two won't] Janis: [in my mind if she ain't snuck in Janis' bed before she's even home, she comes in well early as kids do so LOL] Jimmy: [he's used to that with Bobby cos that boy is always sleeping with him we know] Janis: [and I alluded to it in a previous convo so go us, anyway, yes, that can totally happen, it wouldn't be far if he had to run so makes sense] Jimmy: [it's beyond obvious that you both never wanna leave each other so] Janis: [let's not lie to ourselves lads except lowkey we do lol] Jimmy: [tbf this is the first time you've had a chance to get drunk together since fake dating started cos we didn't have enough booze on the school trip and unlike the flatwhites you aren't lightweights who got drunk during that friendmas game sesh] Janis: [hohohohohoh the potential] Jimmy: [evil laugh x 3 because Winnie is too] Janis: [let's hit up this first shit party, idk if she genuinely got you a costume to put on or what, Imma say yeah but idk if I have anything particularly festive for you so I'll have to look] Jimmy: [I hope she did, what's more festive than crossdressing] Janis: [get it boy, you'll look hot and no one can deny] Jimmy: [she should be an angel like in Hazel's book even if we can't document the lewk] Janis: [I'm sure I'll be able to find that content somehow] Jimmy: [I'm not even gonna try because I know I won't, Ezra Miller and Harry Styles can only do so much and I don't think they've been festive lol] Janis: [yeah, I'm trying to think of like a movie or something where it was a thing hmm] Janis: [oh, the try guys do it, maybe eugene?] Jimmy: [body shots have to happen at one of these shit parties because #mood] Janis: [very easily done with your lewks lol] Jimmy: [that's what I was thinking, just think of all the love bites there would actually be too though what a statement] Janis: [turns up to your function in no clothes, excuse me, y'all are already on one today, there will be no chill we know it] Jimmy: [tipsy before we get there as well tah Ian] Janis: [thank you for nothing but that dickhead] Jimmy: [and actually being there for once so he can stay at mcvickers and be a carefree teen] Janis: [I mean yes but you are those kids dad not jimothy so I will not applaud you] Jimmy: [doing the least and we hate you so much] Janis: [I think Mia should be at the first party and we can catch her whilst we're still a bit sober lol] Jimmy: [yeah definitely one of the earlier ones, it makes sense for that reason and because the parties would obvs start out more basic and get wilder as the night goes on cos most people aren't throwing a rager on christmas eve eve] Janis: [yeah, and if she's at some party that's trying to be sophisticated and lowkey and then they show up 1. LOL 2. she would be caught unawares] Jimmy: [ooh what if she's just gone out with Ella and not the others so it's double tea because that's not in the friendmas spirit] Janis: [I really imagined a date and I was like lovely haha, but totally a vibe, pretending they're busy if the other gals are at another party or whatever] Jimmy: [I might fuck around and give Jimothy an injury of some sort for christmas cos tis the season and Ian is 100% that bitch] Janis: [yeah, he is, a vibe, but not, so rude] Jimmy: [it's gonna have to be christmas eve or day cos they are going to Skerries for boxing day so note to self] Janis: [what if what if that's why she goes to see him xmas day, ultimate rudeness Ian] Jimmy: [yeah because we did say they must] Janis: [dunno where you're huffing off to ian but uninterested, we must] Jimmy: [and then it makes even more sense why they go to Skerries/don't try very hard to come back when they get snowed in, not desperate to spend time with you sir ] Janis: [it all makes sense, also remember the ice bath we can make you a snow pack] Jimmy: [so yeah after whatever they're doing christmas eve, remind me he's gotta go home alone so that can kick off] Jimmy: [also if people have been stupid enough to leave presents under their trees they should steal some] Janis: [noteddd, that's so grinchy and why you don't have xmas parties but with friends people, you deserve it lol, also if we wanna do some messaging, they could lose Mia and have to split up to find her rn, could be amusing] Jimmy: [not all the gifts thank you lads but at least one from every party that it's an option as a memento, ooh good idea boo] Janis: report back, scooby Janis: I'm in the bogs, no sign 😱 Jimmy: leave your 🐕 fetish out of it and concentrate Jimmy: she ain't outside ⛄ Janis: alright, you wanna be daphne Janis: full bimbo now Jimmy: piss off do I wanna be a ginger Jimmy: have a word with yourself Janis: omg VELMA 🤓 Jimmy: how am I not Fred dressed like this? Janis: he was so fashionable Janis: I wanna be Fred though so fuck you Jimmy: UGH fine Jimmy: I know you're 🤓 and I'm him but crack on lying to yourself Janis: that's rude Janis: don't make me your #2 Jimmy: if the glasses fit, girl Janis: 😡 Janis: i'm going kitchen Janis: it's a long shot but i'm getting drink for me and none for you Jimmy: smash some glasses and plates, you'll calm down Jimmy: or you know, make me a 🥪 Janis: knuckle sandwich Jimmy: 😍😍 Janis: so distracting Jimmy: you Janis: nah Janis: we're on a mission focus your 😍😍 Jimmy: [sending her pics of #bants things like I've found her, oh no wait] Janis: [have a lil game, nerds] Jimmy: [obvs you're gonna have to find her eventually I doubt there's that many places she could be so be silly while you can] Janis: Jim I've found her Janis: omg Janis: come here Jimmy: [does even though he's expecting a pisstake] Janis: [hopefully this house isn't that big because you did not tell him anything there lmao, also be quiet or she'll see and you'll ruin it] Jimmy: [she said she was heading to the kitchen so likewise and we'll cross paths lol] Jimmy: 😱😱😱 Janis: [you're so conspicuous rn god bless, but keep an eye on her best you can until you can get dirt] Janis: be 😎 nerd Jimmy: keep your head down 🦒 Janis: i'd say make me but you'll just be 😍😍 Jimmy: [a LOOK that's meant to be pisstakey like what am I like but it's just shamelessly a LOOK lol] Janis: [you know when bitches always kiss in movies when they need to hide, doing that, as if there is a need okay] Jimmy: [love that for you] Janis: [oh the tropes, at least you won't seem arsed by Mia remotely so she'll let her guard down lol] Jimmy: [we're just a lad getting covered in silver, you can relax Mia] Jimmy: [will style that into a 🎅 beard because he's an art hoe] Janis: [what a lewk you two can share] Jimmy: [doing a semi decent job of lip reading Mia even though he's not deaf and whispering to her what he's worked out, doesn't technically need to whisper but the excuse is we're being inconspicuous] Janis: [doing the most to pretend he's being scandalous in ya ear but we listening for real obvs and making our 😳🤤 responses make sense 'do you think there's a free room going?' like do you reckon we'll catch her at it, again] Jimmy: [telling her about all the places he found that you could fuck when he was searching for her, which is lowkey suggestive af boy especially because Mia isn't as shameless as you pair and wouldn't hook up in some of these places] Janis: [telling him which you wanna do first but it's actually where you reckon she might if she's gonna] Jimmy: [agreeing because you agree that it's likely and you're on the same page here] Janis: 🕡 Jimmy: *⏲ Janis: same diff Janis: can't lose 👀 on her Janis: what do we do to kill time without being too distracted Jimmy: 🍻? Janis: [goes to get drink like okay] Jimmy: [is 👀ing you Mia] Janis: gonna suggest this to the gals next time I see em Jimmy: they already follow her about Janis: clealy ain't as good at it as us Janis: but no Janis: the face paint Janis: if you kissed anyone else i'd know instantly Jimmy: bit rude to call me a slag for how I'm dressed but Janis: is it though Jimmy: I just happen to be a slag, alright? Jimmy: nowt to do with any of this Jimmy: [gestures to the lewk] Janis: [looks at him for ages like we forgot what we're doing] Janis: alright Jimmy: are you? Jimmy: [😏 af] Janis: [🖕 which can at least look bantsy to the fans] Jimmy: [a lol soz if that's not inconspicuous hun but the bae is funny] Janis: [bring him a drink back, after taking a massive swig from his like ha ha] Jimmy: [taking pics of her because an angel being 😈] Jimmy: [likewise have forgotten what we're supposed to be doing here for a sec] Janis: [casual photoshoot, be a shame to waste your outfits] Jimmy: [Mia's got no game lbr, you've got time] Janis: [god knows the state of this lad by the time she's ready lol] Jimmy: [another good reason it's an earlier party don't be having a Buster and Chloe rapey situation Mia] Janis: [at least you truly would be as gone, that's the vibe not that] Jimmy: [if your father could see you now hun] Janis: [#disappointeddaddy] Jimmy: [I wish they could call him like come get your daughter but we need this hook up to happen first] Janis: [they should genuinely then bounce though lmao she would actually be so fuming] Jimmy: [don't do it yourself though Jimothy the accent is a dead giveaway, get the bae on it] Janis: [seriously, do some voice work hen, at least a party helps that he'll barely be able to hear, use the house phone] Jimmy: [merry christmas bitch, enjoy the trouble you'll be in] Janis: [hohaha, ANYWAYS, we know you can't stop looking at him gal, how you manage this at all is lowkey impressive lol] Jimmy: [when you get to the second party/on the way there haha you can be as extra as you want, that mission is done and dusted] Janis: [we're so buzzing with ourselves at the prospect of ruining her xmas, practically skip there lmao] Jimmy: [don't you twist you ankle boy as hilarious as that would be] Janis: [we can't have more injuries, and you'd make a right mess of yourself if you fell, it's freezing and you've got no clothes on lol] Jimmy: [yeah that's not festive or goals so be careful please] Janis: [what do we wanna do at this next party then] Jimmy: [just have a nice time tbh lads] Janis: [just partay] Jimmy: [do them body shots and other drinking games cos we're having a messy one and we're competitive af] Janis: [get crunkalunk honey, we can skip to when he's left in the AM now if we wanna] Janis: [after Libi has come in and is like WHERE'S BOBBY as if they also have him tucked up in the bed] Jimmy: [unless there's anything that gets said or done when they're drunk af that we need to know, we know the vibes] Jimmy: [Oh Libi I love you so much but they should facetime him on Cass' phone cos she'll be THRILLED cos you know he's sleeping there and nobody sleeps in that house except Ian] Janis: [ooh, good point actually, we'll do that] Janis: [but yes, poor Jimothy like come sign bitch we gotta talk about santa] Jimmy: [god bless, when you just wanna sleep and snuggle your bae but you got so many jobs] Janis: [being like YOU GOT YOUR COOKIES YOU GOT YOUR MILK AND CARROTS like a checklist 'cos I remember how exciting xmas eve was you were lowkey hysterical all day] Jimmy: [plotting how you're gonna stay awake and peep Santa with those gifts] Janis: [just looking at Jimmy like you ain't gonna get no sleep lol] Jimmy: [mouthing at her to kill you away from the lip reading expert's gaze cos you can't do a dramatic death scene rn the kids are chatting a mile a minute] Janis: [pew pew at his head, also mcvickers gonna be fuming lad] Jimmy: [at least you can leave without having to see them cos that staircase] Janis: [chase you away lmao] Jimmy: [hold in the wee that you clearly will need, your house isn't far] Janis: [run boy run, but we'll throw it back to the end of your partying now] Jimmy: [we should start it as a 🚬 break because that's always good for feels and closeness when it's cold and you're half naked even if we're drunk enough not to feel it] Janis: [just drunkenly telling him about crayon colours we looked up lol] Jimmy: [guessing the colours based on their weird names unless it's obvs and then we're just pisstaking] Janis: [there's some wild ones hun, we're probably making up loads too] Jimmy: [likewise but writing them on her so she has to try and work it out when we could just say it] Janis: [we know where this is devolving and fast, wherever you are not being suitable so you're like hmpf] Jimmy: [on some random person's garden furniture that they should've brought in for the winter but have not] Janis: [you're both gonna start shivering before long so walk in the direction of the houses tah] Jimmy: [handholding and doing the little swinging thing because you've been spending all this time with the bubs] Janis: [loling at him] Jimmy: [playfully nudge her like excuse you but don't push her over because of that drunk and slippy combo please] Janis: ['you're such a nerd, you know'] Jimmy: ['Piss off' but the tone is less fuck off and more yeah I know but so are you] Janis: ['fine' and goes to walk off but likewise is joking so doesn't really] Jimmy: [nevertheless pulling her back and close into you as if she's really going because don't] Janis: ['you want me to stay?' even though you know 'cos how close you are rn] Jimmy: ['don't you want to?' even though she clearly do] Janis: [thinking he's making a point about asking stupid questions like 😏 fine] Jimmy: [just softly touching that 😏 face looking at her like no tell me you want to because we're drunk enough to have been genuinely asking and wanting an answer] Janis: ['I just want you to tell me' shrugs 'no confusion'] Jimmy: ['I just want you' because true] Janis: ['go on then' like it's a challenge but you say it so soft so like it's not] Jimmy: [the most intense kiss ever not even because it's a challenge but because the emotions are just that high okay] Janis: [no time to even talk just taking him by the hand back to yours aka mcvickers not all that way lol] Jimmy: [for a million reasons I hope whatever house you were at isn't far from there but the main one being all the kissing pauses there will be along the way regardless because that's the mood we're in] Janis: [we ain't even gon make it home energy] Jimmy: [100% support that always] Janis: [but you do, and frankly, I don't condone ladder climbing in this state so like be quiet and go in the real way] Jimmy: [that'll be a #mood in itself so] Janis: [getting him out of that santa outfit folornly like you are devvo lol] Jimmy: [gal if you're doing a pouty lip in any way you know what's gonna happen] Janis: [but of course 'why don't you care what people think?' once you can get words out again] Jimmy: ['I care what you think' because we're drunk so we can answer a question and answer it honestly] Janis: ['really?' and a confusion face] Jimmy: [😍 af about her cute expression so we lowkey forget about the question] Janis: [nudge] Jimmy: [a look like ?] Janis: ['why do you care?'] Jimmy: ['about you?' when you were only talking about what she thinks but we're drunk and we've gone deeper with it] Janis: [nods like sure, as you brought it up] Jimmy: ['it's less shit being here 'cause of you, if nowt else you should have the same back off me'] Janis: [when you can't help smile at that 'I don't want you to leave Dublin'] Jimmy: ['I'll stay' like it's that simple remotely but it is when you're drunk af] Janis: ['but you hate it here' and a look like same, obvs] Jimmy: ['I hate it everywhere' because again true] Janis: ['me too' not even trying to be banty like literally yeah same] Jimmy: [a little snugg because we don't want the bae to be sad] Janis: [snugging and sighing 'this is so weird'] Jimmy: [an even bigger sigh because it is and you don't want it to be and just saying sorry in the quietest softest voice like did you even actually say that or no] Janis: [at least it's that quiet 'cos you're meant to be that you would hear and you're shaking your head like no no 'not now, specifically or...it's not your fault, you know' 'cos you mean this whole situation for you 'cos you've never and you're like how did this happen so fast and when did we get here] Jimmy: [a shrug because he thinks everything is his fault always thanks Ian so it's like I don't know/believe that actually but we also don't think the bae is full of shit like we think a lot of people are so it's a confusing and conflicting tangle of thoughts up in here as well cos likewise has also never felt like this or expected any of this when he suggested it lol] Janis: ['I mean it' and properly looking at him but not really driving the point home harder than that right now/yet 'it's okay though, isn't it?'] Jimmy: [a nod that encompasses all the things 'are you?' cos if she's okay that's all that matters bye] Janis: ['is it a dealbreaker?' trying to make light of the fact it's like not really no] Jimmy: ['only if you're breaking our deal' like it's not okay if you don't wanna do this anymore even though it's a headfuck because ILY and I will die] Janis: ['I don't want to'] Jimmy: ['what do you want?' as if we don't know sir] Janis: [poke him in the chest] Jimmy: [just resting his hand over hers like okay I accept that and will turn it into a soft gesture] Janis: [when that lowkey says so much about the dynamic and we can't handle it 'let's just-' and kissing him] Jimmy: [kissing will always be easier so I'll allow it kids] Janis: [do that and more 'til you pass out probably 'cos honestly] Jimmy: [gonna let you say her name during at least once if you want boy because we're both not remembering this and we know it'll hit different sober anyway] Janis: [andioop soz you're trashed huns] Jimmy: [but not because it gives us freedom to do things y'all ain't ready for yet] Jimmy: [but soz that Libi will be waking you up early af]

[eltanin-malfoy]

Get A Grip II

pairing : draco/fem-y/n 

word count : 6.9k (longest thing i’ve ever written)

warning(s) : mentions of torture/trauma/ptsd/anxiety/depression/death/war/sicking up, major major angst, violence, fluff

requested : yes! (a few more times as well but didn’t bother answering them soz)

a/n : so this has turned out to be quite touchy and terribly sad :/ thankfully i kind of aimed for it to be that way. I’ve always felt like the darker side of the war and the tragedies associated with it weren’t ever explored enough. this is also sort of inspired by this angsty dramione au fic i’ve been reading. highly recommended! hopefully it isn’t too much? any feedback is much appreciated! requests are still open but will be posted in later months. (also madam pomfrey is an unsung hero in the series i love her sm) thanks again to my lovely beta @unpeustupide

Part I

Y/N had never been popular at Hogwarts. Well.. she wasn’t exactly unpopular either, she supposed most of the people in her year knew what her name was, but didn’t care enough about her for her to be lunch-table gossip.. She wasn’t exactly the kind of person to constantly draw attention to herself like some of the others in her year liked to do. It was usually one of three ways, either by just being plain rude to people they didn’t like much (which that Malfoy boy seemed to really enjoy), being extremely attractive or generally quite likeable (something she liked to think of Roger Davies) or just doing heroic things no one in their year should have been able to do at all (classic Potter). 

She had a close knit circle of friends but didn’t stray much out of it. She kept up with all the latest gossip, tried to answer questions in class and tried to be pleasant with everyone (unless they were being the opposite). What she’d never been too fond of doing was stepping out of line. Breaking rules wasn’t something she enjoyed at all. Things she assumed must have made rebellious students feel some kind of high would just put her on edge and made her fear for her life. Being out of her common room after curfew was already past the limits for her, so when she heard whispers about Potter’s alternative DADA classes in her fifth year, she’d stayed out of all of that, knowing it would inevitably lead to trouble. I mean, come on, it was Potter and his rag-tag friends. That’s what they did. That wasn’t something she wanted to get her nose into, especially since Umbridge had been in charge. And when ‘Dumbledore’s Army’ was caught later in the year, she knew she’d been right. Even if she very well knew how bad of a teacher Umbridge was and how members of the group had ended up fighting against a bunch of Death Eaters at the end of the year (which of course, was also seriously life threatening), she knew she didn’t want to risk her picture perfect record over anything. 

That was.. until their seventh year. The year with the Carrows and Snape as headmaster and the rise of You Know Who growing more and more imminent. That was when she finally began to realise why Potter and his mates always acted as heroic as they did. That was when that stupid, overwhelming sense of guilt began to make its way into her very being.

The Carrows practically reigning over the school drove the mood of the castle effectively down the drain. There was a constant sense of dread, it seemed. Even the pleasant evenings she’d spent with housemates in her common room suddenly began to feel distressing. Obeying the rules was now of paramount importance, with any such disobedience meaning actual physical torture. 

Her DADA class especially had become treacherous. It seemed rather ironic to call it the Defence against the Dark Arts. They were forced to turn into what they were meant to defend against. It wasn’t a class she’d always found easy or anything like that, but, dear Merlin, she really did not anticipate practicing the Cruciatus curse on students, at all. She was absolutely mortified the first time.. She felt like retching the moment she’d spotted the innocents (just because the Carrows thought they were guilty of some rulebreaking did not mean they deserved an Unforgivable!) standing by the wall, most of them trembling and gripping it to hold themselves up. 

She’d wanted to step out of the class that instant, but she realised an even worse fate would await her if she decided against it. Carrow hadn’t wasted even a second when Neville Longbottom declined the offer and quickly used his wand to cut into his cheek. She felt so immensely jealous as she saw they’d permitted stupid, awful, Malfoy out of the activity, him having muttered something about having enough experience with it to judge the others somehow accepted as a valid excuse by the monster that was Amycus Carrow. (Although she supposed his being a Death Eater also helped with that.)

Her wand had trembled as Carrow walked over to her and glared at her, then begun to yell at her to begin her casting the spell.

Ugh. His spit was sprinkled over her cheek. His teeth bared, yellow and grimy. She wiped it away with her wand and quickly turned her gaze away.

 She had looked at the nervous ginger Hufflepuff girl in front of her with as much of an apologetic expression as she could muster, blurting out the incantation. She’d failed, of course, she knew such dark magic required true intent, something she really, really didn’t have in this situation. At all. 

She had looked over at Malfoy with a look of immense hatred, almost wishing she could curse him instead. It had been him who’d brought this all upon them. If all the rumors were true, it was him who’d managed to get all the Death Eaters into the castle in the first place. It was him who’d been given the responsibility of killing Dumbledore, which of course, he hadn’t managed to do, (dear Merlin, that scoundrel can't do a single thing right!) but it was as good as if he had, right? But what she was surprised to see was his lanky figure trailing around behind the group, hands jittering as he nervously tugged at his lower lip with his teeth. He brought his hands into his now limp, blonde hair as he heard the first few cries of despair. His eyes then darted over and looked back at the students and Y/N quickly looked to the front again, confused by what she’d seen.

She went back to her dormitory and cried her eyes out, the screams of the students ripping through her the whole time. The sound was like a bell, it rang and rang, a death toll, a constant reminder of what a coward she was, a bell to swing her away from sleep's shy arms. She skipped dinner and even whatever little she’d even managed to eat earlier in the day was forced out of her system, but even that burning feeling in her throat couldn’t match the agony that embodied the guilt that had seemed to find a place to live inside of her. 

This is all because of you! You didn’t even try to do anything! You’re such a coward! If you’d even tried the slightest bit to help everyone who’d been working against them, maybe all of those children wouldn’t have had to suffer like they had to today. You’re a terrible person! So extremely selfish! 

She’d walked to the girls’ restroom by her dormitory and just stared into the mirror. Her eyes were rimmed red and her cheeks were unnaturally splotchy with color. This is your punishment, you know? Feeling like this? It’ll never go away. Ever. She didn’t even know where this train of thought had emerged from, but she couldn’t help but feel that she deserved all of it. 

In an effort to drive away that sense of worthlessness, Y/N decided to take some kind of action. The first thing she decided to do was apologise as much as she possibly could to the Hufflepuff girl. The next morning, before breakfast, she’d waited outside the Great Hall to see if the girl was arriving, but to her astonishment, the girl was nowhere to be seen. 

Could she have been staying in her dormitory for the day? Perhaps to somehow drown out all the trauma she’d experienced the previous day..  Or maybe she couldn’t get a wink of sleep all night like Y/N and was struggling to sleep now! She’d never be able to get to her then! That was if.. she even permitted her to. She supposed she would understand if that was the case as well, she definitely wouldn’t even want to associate with someone who’d been attempting to use an Unforgivable on her.. But what was suspicious was that most of the students who’d been part of those experimented on in that very sad class weren’t among the students gathered up for breakfast. They were all nowhere to be seen.

She couldn’t find the courage to ask her housemates if they had any idea where they could be. They all seemed equally taken aback by the events and an unnatural hush had spread around the area. She decided to skip breakfast, with her stomach still performing somersaults in her abdomen, and walked around the castle in hopes of figuring out where they’d all vanished to. She didn’t remember any students having stayed back in her own common room..

The first place (and thankfully, the last place she had to look in) she decided to go to proved to be exactly where everyone had ended up, the Hospital Wing. Most of the students there were lying on their beds, staring up at the ceiling vacantly and flinching as they heard her footsteps, while the rest were fast asleep in their beds, still in their uniforms. The students who were awake looked over at her, some even growing startled. She attempted to soothe them with a slight smile and it seemed to work, all of them returning to their same vacant looks.

Y/N shuffled over to the Hufflepuff from earlier, fiddling with the sides of her robes. The girl was fast asleep, her red curls strewn messily over her pillow. She seemed so peaceful like this.. It was as if yesterday had never happened.

“She’s taken a potion for dreamless sleep, are you a friend of hers?” She almost jumped up at the sudden words sprung at her and looked behind her. Madam Pomfrey had stepped out of her office and was glancing at Y/N curiously. 

“Um.. sort of..” Y/N set her hands on her sides.

“Alright.. you’re free to stay here until it’s time for your next class. The students don’t seem to mind having you around much.” Madam Pomfrey adjusted her own robes and walked over to the other students, muttering something under her breath about punishments being out of hand..

Before she knew it, Y/N was stepping over to the woman to speak with her. At first, she wanted to ask her if she could allow her to use some of that potion herself, if perhaps she could be granted access to it for the rest of the year, but she found herself stumbling with her words. “M-madam.. I was wondering…” 

“Yes?” The older woman turned around, her headdress swishing slightly. 

“Well.. um..” You can’t possibly expect her to give any to someone who’s performed an Unforgivable on a younger student! 

“Come on now, we don’t have all day.”

“I was wondering if I could help you. As in.. with the other students. I don’t want anything in return.. I just want to help them.” The words just came rushing out of her mouth and she could do nothing to stop them, and before she knew it, Pomfrey’d accepted her offer and basically made her consent to volunteering all her spare time in the Hospital Wing.

Y/N grew to love it, though. Helping ailing students certainly eased the burden she’d constantly felt on her shoulders. While she did absolutely detest seeing young ones in pain when they should have been playing around on the grounds without a care in the world, it was rewarding to her to be able to ease their struggles even the slightest bit. 

As the months progressed, she found herself growing more and more curious into the world of Healing. She began picking up books in the library on the subject and going through them. Her newfound passion seemed to ease some of the guilt she’d been feeling, and so she delved even further.  

In November, she discovered a book very much related to the field which most interested her which was seemingly untouched, Remedies For Wizarding War Maladies. It was an interesting read, to say the least. Some of the illustrations and images were hard to get through, but the instructions and articles along with them were extremely informative. It was also this book that introduced her to a more unfamiliar concept : shell shock.

While some of the new physical torture at Hogwarts (the Carrows were actually stooping down to hurt some students with their own bare hands) had certainly acquainted Y/N with all sorts of injuries, mental illness was something even Madam Pomfrey didn’t seem to really know much about. Shell shock was apparently first discovered by the Muggles during their own first World War. Soldiers would return traumatized and in some cases, senile, after being exposed to the terrifying reality of war. The Muggles had gone on to call it Post Traumatic Stress Disorder in recent times and had learnt that it wasn’t just war the illness could spring from, it was any sort of trauma.

Is this what I have? Is this what we all have? Is there even any real way to cure it? Or will we all just have to learn to live with that constant sense of hurt? Her heart seemed to drop lower down her chest as the thought of all the younger students experiencing such things popped into her head. All those children.. they aren’t even guilty of anything. Can being a muggle-born or a sympathizer be considered a crime? These people are absolutely inhuman. 

Suddenly, she felt the urge to just take up all the first years in the castle and just wrap them up in a thick blanket. Perhaps just pretend to be their mother hen and keep them safe from any sort of harm. And so, these thoughts were what triggered her to break the rules for the first time in her life. She started to hide students the Carrows had called for detention or even further punishment. At first, she’d only been able to sneak girls away into her own dormitory or the restrooms. She’d keep them there until nightfall, then find a way to help them back to their own beds or conjure up mattresses for them to just sleep in hers. It was always very risky and so the only ones who even knew about it were the others who lived in the same room as her. They’d all sworn to keep it secret, but even then she sometimes just worked on these plans alone. 

When she returned after her winter break, she began to feel extremely guilty for not protecting the boys as well. They were just as vulnerable and didn’t deserve anything they got from the Carrows either. Y/N began walking around the corridors at night, searching for a place to keep them. She had a lot of options to pick from, but all of them seemed easy to infiltrate. It was terribly frustrating. She’d realised a few members of ‘Dumbledore’s Army’ had more or less disappeared from the castle. Neville Longbottom.. Seamus Finnigan.. and countless others whose names she couldn’t recall. 

She was walking along the seventh floor corridor one night, clad in a dressing robe and her pyjamas, when she saw someone she hadn’t seen in a long while coming out of a set of double doors she didn’t recognise : Longbottom. Very quickly, she made her way to him and questioned him, assuring him she wouldn’t rat him out.

The Room Of Requirement.. Of course that’s a thing. Everything makes sense now. 

She begged him to let her allow other students who needed to hide from the Carrows into the room with him and was this close to actually kneeling in front of him when he finally agreed. Within weeks, it became routine for her to stop by the room with a couple of students before heading down to the Hospital Wing.

It soon became clear to the Carrows that there was an overwhelming amount of students on their ‘hit list’ that had gone missing over time. They’d begun to drop in uninvited into various common rooms and dormitories, not even caring for the students’ privacy anymore. It was during one of these unplanned drop ins that Y/N was finally caught red-handed. 

She was walking through the corridors with a bunch of first year Gryffindors on a Hogsmeade weekend when the castle was supposed to be more or less empty. She’d been careless, really. She was sporting casual, colourful Muggle clothes, something the Carrows had seemed to absolutely despise, although they didn’t act much on it. In hindsight, it was also some sort of rebellion against them. Then, all of a sudden, Alecto had appeared out of nowhere and had nonverbally bound Y/N with ropes, making her fall to the ground while the first years began to panic and ran away helter skelter. Y/N began to squirm herself, her heart beginning to race in her chest as she stared into space. She began to hyperventilate and tears soon welled up in her eyes, and all Carrow did was laugh maniacally as she always did. 

While Y/N might never even have come up among the Death Eaters before, this had effectively pulled her name onto the list of their most hated students. If she’d been in Dumbledore’s Army, Merlin knew she’d have been killed, but fortunately, or unfortunately rather, Alecto had Crucio-ed her personally till she could barely even feel her extremities anymore. The sudden experience had made her realise why many considered suffering the Cruciatus Curse even worse than death. 

It really was worse than anything she’d ever experienced before. Heartbreak, cramps, broken bones, they were all nothing compared to that almost sizzling sensation that rang out throughout her body when the spell was inflicted on her. It was as if a billion, burning needles had poked through her skin and were splitting her apart, inch by inch. She wondered if that was how it felt when she’d been forced to cast it on those students. She then wished Alecto had just killed her and got it over with. The guilt which had made its way into her mind only continued to increase.

After they’d questioned her and she’d continually refused to offer in any sort of information on where Dumbledore’s Army was hiding, Y/N was practically a husk of the person she was before. She’d blacked out countless times after being tortured and there seemed to constantly be a metallic taste in the back of her throat. When they’d decided they’d had enough with her, they’d sent her off to Madam Pomfrey and that’s where she had woken up, tucked away in one of the beds she was used to tending to students in, with Madam Pomfrey standing beside it, holding a handkerchief to her face and shaking slightly.

“Oh, Miss Y/L/N, you’re awake.” She attempted to hide it behind her and sniffled slightly, but it was no use. Y/N opened her mouth to speak but could barely manage out a croak, so instead, she just gave her a weak smile and nodded, her neck still hurting the slightest bit as she did. 

The days passed quickly after that. Sudden noises would still make her wince a bit and Dreamless Sleep Potion was the only way her nights weren’t interrupted by memories of that horrible, horrible occurrence. The Carrows had decided that she was to be expelled from the school after that, but instead of sending her back to her family, they (and apparently Snape agreed with them) felt she should be sent to Malfoy Manor. She barely had the energy to stand up for more than a few minutes and thus could barely even defend herself in front of them. She was forced to consent to this decision and went along with it, apparating there by herself after Madam Pomfrey deemed her healthy enough to, just to have her wand seized off her by one of the many Death Eaters there.

Life there was quite terrifying, even more than it was at the castle. The only thing that made it the slightest bit better was that she wasn’t forced to torture anyone, or have to witness it with her own eyes. She hated the cellar in the basement with every bit of her soul, but it was still some sort of refuge from what lay above. There were other students there too, but they were all younger than she was. There were families there too, couples who weren’t much older than she was, and people who looked to be even older than her own grandparents. It seemed to her that she was the most invulnerable among them. Even though she still felt like a small child who desired to cry forever in her heart, she pushed these thoughts away and tried to brace herself to stay strong for everyone else.

She found herself consoling crying prisoners, teaching them how to save the meagre gruel they got for later and hoping, wishing that everyone stuck in the cellar with her wasn’t destined for a premature death. While it wasn’t often that one of the prisoners was pulled out of the cellar to be tortured, she found herself growing anxious at the thought of something like that happening at all. Everyone there with her were in similar states as herself, faces pale or unnaturally pink, figures much thinner than they were originally and still in the dishevelled clothing they had on before. 

One day, instead of the usual house elf coming down with their gruel, she realised that it was.. Draco Malfoy. She’d lost track of the days since she’d come here, but realised that it must be Easter break. He was bizarrely gentle and no one seemed repulsed at the sight of him, and so she grew curious. 

The prisoners who’d been there a few months longer than she had told her stories of what he’d done in winter break, how he’d set a whole family free and helped so many others who were suffering out of the area and into another place. They seemed to trust him, and somehow, she felt she was growing towards it too.

I should hate him! She thought. He was always cruel! Always so unkind and ungrateful to anyone who wasn’t ready to suck up to him. His friends also seemed afraid of him. He’s the reason Dumbledore was murdered! He’s the reason the castle was taken over by the Death Eaters. I should hate him and never forgive him ever.

But for some reason, she realised something. He was still just a boy. He was still just seventeen (or perhaps eighteen, but that didn’t make a difference). She’d heard about everything with his father.. was that why he was the way he was? Why was he suddenly so kind with all of them? Was it all just an elaborate ruse to win their trust and then betray all of them in the end? Was he even leading all of these people out of the Manor? Or was he leading the poor idiots to their deaths? 

Whatever it was, she knew she’d never be able to get an answer if she kept on placing so much disbelief in the boy’s deeds. It wasn’t soon before he’d begun helping the other prisoners out during his stay. He’d seemed to have noticed her, but of course, smiling politely or engaging in small talk were really out of the question. He’d seemed to have wanted to help her out as well, but she declined any such offers, pointing him towards others who were clearly suffering more than she was. 

Merlin knew she craved some Dreamless Sleep potion, then perhaps she wouldn’t have those dreams anymore. She had forced herself not to think about it much but it still ate away at her. What must have happened to her family? Had the Carrows sent out something to capture them too? The dreams she had of them were all alarmingly short. In some of them they’d be screaming for her to help them, in some they’d smile and wave, but then just disappear. Regardless, if there was anything she wanted more than for all of the other prisoners to escape, it was to see her loved ones again. There was no saying what the Death Eaters might have done to them.

It had been a week or so since Draco had first begun helping people out of the Manor in front of her. Some kind of memory or dream had sparked the third year Gryffindor to cry, Emile, if she remembered correctly. She was attempting to help him feel better, rubbing his back as he lay down on the floor, his chest shuddering as he continued to sob. 

She was almost stunned when Malfoy arrived and politely waved her off. She just sat back and watched the display in front of her. Who would have thought Draco Malfoy, the boy who seemed to be popular for getting on everyone’s nerves (and maybe, just maybe for not looking.. unattractive), would be up to something like this in the height of the Second Wizarding War, that too with his family on the Dark side of all things?

She’d leaned onto a wall as her eyes followed Malfoy leading Emile out of the cellar. And then, hoping he’d lead him to a safe place, she took a deep breath and relaxed. She sat in her place quietly, smiling over at any child who waved over at her when suddenly, she heard shouting from upstairs. 

Everyone in the cellar fell silent and looked at each other, confused yet curious as to what the commotion was about. Y/N felt a sudden lurch of anxiety inside of her. Had they been caught? Had they brought new prisoners? Were they going to take someone else upstairs? She looked around at the others in the room, shifting to hug her knees. 

Before she could understand what was going on, she heard someone yelling as they walked down the steps outside. Everyone looked over at the door curiously and were astonished at who came in. It was Draco Malfoy. The heir of the very wealthy family whose manor they were all forced to reside in was bundled up on the floor, clearly injured.

She was this close to getting up to check on him when he sat up himself, muttered something and then stared back at the rest of them. He managed out a few more words and then shrunk back, covering his face as she assumed he began to cry, slight sniffles audible.

When she thought others had stopped paying attention, she went over to talk to him. She felt so very pitiful for him as he spoke, and suddenly, she offered him a hug and he actually accepted it. He held her very tightly and shivered, almost exactly like a scared child would. She could feel him continue to cry and nodded gently as he confessed to her his fears. 

She was almost certain that he’d never said any of this to anyone before. He truly was just a child in front of her in that moment, and she held onto him as such. She found herself pressing a gentle peck to his head, she almost froze, thinking it was too much but Draco only seemed to relax further, and so she just held him the way he had arranged the two of them, her hand still ruffling his hair gently. 

He soon fell asleep in her arms and with her head resting atop his, she felt like she was really cradling a sleeping child. Well, a child that was much larger and heavier than she was, but much more vulnerable in that moment. As he fell silent and leaned sideways onto the wall, she began to think to herself, hands still gently stroking the fabric of his dark shirt. 

Would he be able to make it out of this alive? With him laying against her the way he was and how hopeless he’d acted.. It was perfectly clear what his stance on the issue was. He wasn’t wrong.. He Who Must Not Be Named wasn’t known for being merciful. So, really, the question was, when and how? But Y/N wasn’t one to consider someone who’d presented themselves so vulnerably to her as good as dead. If only she had her wand.. 

She could have cast a nice Disillusionment Charm on him. Or, perhaps even tried Human Transfiguration and changed his features into those of a stranger. Or, she wished that she could just use some Muggle tactics like a tarp to hide him if anyone came looking. But obviously, there was nothing she could do but hope for the best. 

Soon enough, he was slumped against the wall, his hands loosely gripping at the hem of her sweater and his mouth open as he took slow, deep breaths. She slowly shifted back and laid his head against the wall. His face was unusually soft, that scowl that normally decorated it was nowhere to be seen. It made Y/N more curious as to whom he really was. Perhaps his usual selfish, arrogant persona was just pretense. Just a mask for how innocent he was inside. 

She reached over to brush a stray strand of hair behind his ear, fingers brushing by the side of his face. Draco stirred slightly and flinched at her touch, which made her draw her hand back. Soon, she detached herself from him and sat beside him, nibbling nervously at her lower lip. 

She got up and tried to get her mind off of it again. Some children were gathered together, talking about something and giggling to themselves. She really did look up to their ability to make the best out of every situation. If only she could have been ten again. Then perhaps people would have enough sympathy not to hurt her, and then she wouldn’t have been in Hogwarts at all, so all those memories wouldn’t have burned into her mind. But now, really, all that she could do was hope for the best.

She felt her stomach growling and sat down on the floor, hugging her knees again in an attempt to somehow hide it and cause that feeling to shrink away. She felt warmer curled up like that as well, even a bit childlike. She smiled to herself for a second and shut her eyes, but sat up straight again as those bloody visions returned. 

She took deep breaths to soothe herself, trying her best not to attract the attention of anyone near her. She bit down on her lip harshly and looked over at how peaceful Draco looked asleep, his nostrils flaring slightly. He even resembled a sleeping child. She felt her lips curling upwards and she was reminded of her own loved ones. Oh, how she missed them.. This would be her first Easter without them. This drove her to a train of thought she really wasn’t fond of. 

Is this the first of many? Where even are they? Are they even alive? Are they happy? Do they know where I am? Do they know I’m alive? 

She felt goosebumps beginning to rise at the back of her neck as she grew more and more anxious.

Will I even be alive to see them ever again? Are they hurt all because of me? Will I make it out of here alive? Or will I even be able to speak to them? How much longer does Draco have? Will I be able to protect him? 

I won’t! Of course I won’t! I’m so goddamn useless. All I’ve done is let everyone down. Those Gryffindors.. I don’t even know if they’re alright today. I just left them astray. How could I have been so careless? They were all just children. Defenseless against the Carrows. Of course they must be hurt. All because of me! You probably lead the Carrows straight to the Army’s hideout. They’re probably all getting tortured because of you now. 

Images of Neville and his friends being whipped and Crucio-ed suddenly sprung up in her mind and she began to shudder visibly. Similar images of her own family popped up in her head and she retched, suddenly shifting off to the corner and kneeling, that similar burning in her throat as she got rid of whatever gruel she’d scarfed down earlier in the day.

Would it ever stop hurting? Would such innocent sights always continue to spark such painful reactions? There was no way for her to know. None at all. She gripped her stomach and shifted away from the wall, disgusted by the sight of her own sick. Others noticed her and came to comfort her, but alas! There was someone coming down the stairs again. Someone wearing heels.

She heard that same wicked laughter everyone in the cellar had learned to fear. She knew what was happening. It was time for Draco to.. NO! She wasn’t going to let that happen!

She walked over to him and slumped down next to him, setting her arms around his neck again. He woke up quickly and shook in her grasp, but relaxed again. “..Y/N?”  He muttered as he hugged her again, setting his head on top of hers again. “What happened? Are you alright?” 

She hadn’t even realised when the tears had made their way out of her eyes and had begun to drip onto his shirt. “I’m fine.. Just.. just shh..” She drew her head back and looked at him again, studying his face carefully. He looked alarmed, not afraid as he should have been, but suddenly his expression grew more and more nervous. He’d heard the footsteps.

“Is that..?” He didn’t complete his statement and drew her closer to him, his hands rising up to grip her shoulders. She could feel his arms shielding her in that position, trying to hide her almost. She couldn’t help but shift onto his lap, still sniffling as she buried her face in the crook of his neck. Maybe if they sat that way Bellatrix wouldn’t see where Draco was and leave. And then maybe that would be it. She couldn’t let somebody else get hurt. Not again.

The cellar door slammed open but Y/N kept her eyes shut tight, holding him as close to her as she could. He began crying himself and was literally clinging to her for life. She looked up at his face and his eyes met hers, blinking slowly as a single tear dripped down his cheek. The heels clicked over nearer to them and she swore she heard her grunt. Draco suddenly gulped and whispered to her. “L-let go of me.”

“Are you- No, I can’t.”

“Please.. She-she won’t hesitate to hurt you..” 

“No,no.. It doesn’t matter. I have to-”

“Y/N, please. You don’t deserve to get hurt all because of me.”

Y/N gave in and slipped off of him, her side towards the wall as she continued to face him. Bellatrix saw him and cackled again, walking over to grab him by the ear. She glanced over at Y/N and her eyes narrowed. “You’re turning into a blood traitor right before our very eyes, aren’t you, Draco?” He didn’t say a word but let out a groan of pain, his pale face turning red.

She wanted so badly to stop what was going on, to just grab onto Draco’s hand and pull him back. If she’d had the courage to do so, she would have stopped Bellatrix with her bare hands and would have nipped the problem in the bud right there. But she sat there, just frozen, tears streaming down her cheeks. 

As Bellatrix pulled him out of the cellar and shut the door behind her, Y/N felt as if everything was moving in slow motion around her. She could feel her heart begin to pound in her chest and she slid onto the floor, everything around her growing hazy as her breaths quickened. 

She’d let another person down again! Just like all those other times. She really couldn’t do a single thing right. All she’d done thus far was lead to others getting hurt. 

She felt her throat tighten and she spluttered out, eyes darting around frantically. She gripped the cold edge of the wall and forced herself to sit up and count to ten. I can’t give in to those feelings. Not like this. 

She felt someone’s hand on her shoulder and shuddered at first, but then relaxed as she realised who it was. “Luna..” The blonde just nodded and squeezed her shoulder reassuringly. “I’ll sit with you Y/N…  that was very hard to watch from afar as well, you know.” She didn’t respond to this and just stared down at her lap, her breaths slowing back down to normal. 

It wasn’t long before another bunch of footsteps rang out outside the door and two familiar faces popped in. She recognised them almost instantly. It was almost to be expected.. their unexpected heroics. Weasley and.. what looked like Potter were standing by the door, curiously staring at all the prisoners. Luna sprung up almost immediately and went over to them, but she wasn’t as cheery as she always used to be, and the two looked at her as if she was some queer exhibit at a museum. 

Weasley walked over to the door and stared out the small window at the top as a girl’s bloodcurdling scream rung out from above. Who is that…? It can’t be.. Granger?! Y/N felt panicked again but forced herself to stay calm, something very, very odd was about to happen and she couldn’t risk losing her marbles in a situation like this.

Weasley shouted out something to the two of them and Potter nodded before reaching into his pocket for what looked like a piece of glass. He turned it over in his palm before his eyes widened behind his glasses, and he muttered something to it. Seems like the war is driving him mad as well..

Y/N sat there for a bit, then shifted over to the other prisoners, trying her best to answer any doubts they had about what was going on. This was quite difficult with her own lack of knowledge, but she managed to satiate them by telling them that they were a part of the right side of things. 

A loud ‘pop’ sound grabbed everyone’s attention, and an oddly dressed house elf had appeared in the middle of the room. “Dobby!” Potter called out and hobbled over to speak to him. Soon, Potter looked over at the crowd and began to speak.

“Everyone…Dobby will get you out of here and to a safe house. Please keep calm and quiet, and we’ll get you all out soon enough.” Everyone grew excited at once, especially the children, at even the prospect of escaping.

Y/N should have been jumping out of her skin with glee, hugging one of the other students, but something continued to eat away at her insides.

“Th-thank you so much… for all of this. Really. Some people here have been trapped for months.” She said to them once the others seemed to have scampered off to get their things. “I’ve realised only recently how terrifying all of this is.. We’ll never be able to pay you back for this. Life here has been hell.”

Potter muttered something dismissively but Y/N barely even registered any sounds coming from his mouth, her brain still caught up in a weird frenzy. “Please-please.. Try and save Draco.” She swallowed and surveyed their faces as she said this, remembering their school yard rivalry with him. Both of their faces grew alarmed at first, with Weasley’s expression turning into a bit of a snarl while Potter just stared at her like she was crazy.

“I know you never got along with him.. And that he was mean and everything. Believe me, I remember all of that. But.. here.. There were apparently way more people here before winter break. Draco helped all of them escape. Seriously.” She stared down at her feet, now afraid to meet their gazes. “Draco was helping a third year escape even today and he got caught during by some of the Death Eaters.. I’m sure they’ll kill him or torture him to death if he’s left here.”

She looked up at them again and the both of them were clearly uncomfortable. Weasley glanced over to the side and flinching as the same girl’s screams rang out again. He walked over to the door while Potter looked back at her timidly. “Y/L/N.. we’ll.. try our best. You should go along with that group..” He pointed over at a bunch of students huddled together, whispering something.

She nodded and smiled weakly at him. “Thank you. For everything.” She walked over to the group and joined them, offering them all a smile and whispering words of encouragement. She knew she could hide her anxiety for now and looked over at the house-elf as it appeared. It waddled over to them and they quickly bunched up around it. Its ball-like eyes looked around at them and its mouth curled into a smile. “Hang on tight.”

It snapped its fingers and Y/N felt that same strange tugging sensation under her navel, feeling herself getting pulled forward and almost falling into space when suddenly, her body met solid ground. She sat up straight and looked around herself. They’d all been transported to a beach, a nice expansive beach. There was a cottage a short walk away where she could see a few people waving over at them and some prisoners were already walking towards it. She decided not to get up as yet, running her fingers through the soft sand and thinking to herself.

You will see him again. He hasn’t died because of you. Get a grip on yourself.

[sveasauvageon]

Ce qu'il a donné Un an, deux ans, cent ans de bonheur Puis la vie te cueille comme une fleur || GW

☾♔; March 5, 2018 ☾♔; sotd: Котик by Alexander Rybak   ☾♔; comedian otd: JOHN OLIVER   ☾♔; GW To do list ☾♔; {G} https://goo.gl/XSTtMc ☾♔; mod(s): @themadmonarchist @maybones et moi

Title: lyrics from "Requiem" by Alma

--featured not-mine oc's - Eloise Avery | @themadmonarchist - Minah Delacroix | @maybones (see what I did there with the Serena and Blair positioning? -eyebrow wriggle thing-)

- - - x - - -

Updated GW to-do list: - Division of labour (we should really start saying when one of us starts working on something because otherwise we'll end up with redundancies since we think disturbingly alike) - the "chuck" problem: okay, tbh, it's more of an Ed Westwick problem than a chuck one. I don't know how you guys have reacted to the me too and time's up movements, but mine has been to cut all those men out of my sphere of entertainment, I even cut out "witch hunt", "not all men" type dudes, and "only fondled their breasts on tv and apologized for it" men (aka Ben Affleck), because time is up for all of you! Soz, not point, but since last October, Ed Westwick has been caught up in this, and thus far 3 women have accused him of ra.pe and a fourth of sexual misconduct. Now, I know it's not Chuck's fault that his portrayer is a ra.pist (allegedly), but there is still an issue with including his face, etc in aesthetics and gossip girl material because his face is that of a ra.pist's (allegedly). Tbh, I wanna leave him (Ed Westwick) out of material and only discuss Chuck and avoid showing his face or use a dreamcast instead, but like, I dunno what you guys wanna do. Chuck is a great character, although, early on, he was quite rap.ey, the character, and it does not help that his portrayer has since been revealed to be a ra.pist. Allegedly.

- also, going back up to the redundancy issues, I love both of your aesthetic collections and playlists, so for those, I was thinking for playlist, we should make one big playlist on spotify that's collaborative, so that everyone can add their music and it'll kind of be a huge explosion of musical tastes. But also, maybe have a collection that has a link on the group info for individual playlists for characters, and the group made by us and/or others. For aesthetic collections, basically the same idea with one big collaborative collection, and then that collection will have links to other collections (yes, I'm a little ocd).

- also, also, this is completely unrelated, but I was watching trevor noah's show and he made a joke about how much trump's male employees snitch and gossip like sht, but the woman haven't revealed squat. (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CpmlVWFTW8A) It's really funny, and honestly, stupid people fcking up in trump's circle very publically is basically what's keeping me alive. It's just hilarious how stupid some of these people are. ___________________________ Another Update (I'll leave those up until @maybones weighs in on them)

I was working on a draft of the group description to show you guys, and I was using a template of one of my old groups and rewriting stuff and changing it to suit our purposes and I realized how many freaking rules I have (I'm so picky), anyway, some of this stuff obvs won't be applicable (like, there's one about characters dying and I don't think we were planning on going that dark. although, serena was an accessory and chuck kind of killed his dad, so meh, maybe?) anyway, I wanted your opinions on what rules to keep and/or change:

✠ RULES AND GUIDELINES {GENERAL} ✠

I. Please be kind to each other. Your characters can be total jerks, but let us, the creators and/or writers be kind, polite, and respectful (aka, channel your inner Canadian guys). There will be absolutely ZERO tolerance of discrimination. You will be immediately removed from the group, and your actions will be documented and reported. PM me immediately if someone harasses you or you notice harassment between members. ⠀⠀Ia. If you want to be anonymous, for any reason, you can send in your complaints here {https://goo.gl/kbTXeU}, it's a google form, and it doesn't ask you verify your email, and the username option, is just an option, it's not required. If I need to make further contact/information from you regarding your concern, I'll make a group announcement vaguely describing your issue, and you can send in further information anonymously again. I'll be checking the form at least once a week.  

⠀II. I'm not giving this any specific rating, however, I will say, you're free to include whatever "adult" content you want, whether it be swears, gore, or the dirty stuff (I'm totally a mature, grown up adult guys). However, do be careful of polyvore's stupid censors, use workarounds like writing your story in google docs, or accents for swear words.  

⠀III. This is a non-elimination group,  but characters can die. It may be used for inactive members, or if you wanna kill 'em off or maybe revive as a ghost or something else. Permission will always be asked of the creator first (with the exception of characters belonging to inactive members, whose characters may be killed off as penalty).  

⠀IV. If you miss 3 consecutive contests (without informing me), you'll receive an "x", "|" will be used to break up non-consecutively missed contests, anyway, if you miss 3 in a row, that will open your character to be killed by either myself or other group members. You will be notified, but your permission will not be asked. If you wish to rejoin at a later date, and you character has not been killed off, simply pm me and continue with whatever contest is in progress. If your character has been killed off, you can re-audition with a new one, and I will transfer your points to your new character.

⠀V. Always pm me, your vodka aunt mod, if you feel you'll be unable to enter a contest, your reason doesn't matter. Just let me know you can't get your entry in, that way you won't receive an "X".

⠀VI. Plotting will be left open throughout the group, however, please establish a few of these before contests begin, and always ask permission when using someone else's character(s) and be sure to tag them in your sets. Please, PLEASE work with others, I hate when people just do their own thing in oc battle groups, this is a collaborative story, everyone's stories and ideas matter. I will call you out if I notice something that contradicts the connected story, and I will always, ALWAYS incorporate the stories of group members into the overall narrative. ⠀⠀VIa. Narrative precedence will always be given to the person who completely finishes the description of their set first.

⠀VII. There is not a list of roles to pick from, you can create whatever roles you want, however, I may ask you to change it if I feel your character may become "villager number 6" and not fit in with the action. Rules, regulations, and suggestions for roles can be found here: [placeholder].

⠀VIII. Always be sure to tag the member's when you use their characters and give credit where credit is due.

⠀IX. Plagiarism will not be tolerated and you will be removed and reported. If you're inspired by someone else's work, credit them, otherwise you're stealing.

⠀X. Sets unrelated to the group will be removed.

⠀XI. You will NOT be required to write out a full story. Story portions can be answered in paragraphs, but full stories are always welcome and appreciated.  

⠀XII. Do not use templates for contest entries unless otherwise stated.

⠀XIII. Always feel free to contact me with any and all questions, and/or suggestions. You can also send them through the anonymous complaints form, found here: https://goo.gl/kbTXeU

_________________________________

✠ RULES AND REGULATIONS {FACECLAIMS} ✠

I'm quite picky about these, but I'm not gonna be pedantic about it this time. You do you. Having said that, there are still some rules and regulations, as well as a challenge.

⠀I. All faceclaims must be above the age of majority (that's 18+ nearly universally on the planet), there is an exception for child characters but all main OCs must be at least 18.

⠀II. All faceclaims MUST be professionals. They can be actors, models, even singers. However, they must be singers of some note signed onto a label company, like Taylor Swift, or my beloved Dima Bilan (who's also an actor. a good one. yes, I'm bragging). Your faceclaim CANNOT be someone insta-famous, youtubers, or tumblr tweens.

⠀III. Whilst I'm not going to reject any faceclaim on the pedantic basis of "I don't like them", there are some faceclaims that I will and for one reason, and one reason only. Sexual misconduct of any and all kinds. Hollywood and the media are finally cleaning house, and I don't want those dicks in my nerd sht either. To be clear, I don't care whether the misconduct was simply groping a woman's breasts on camera and apologizing about 10 years later, I am going to reject everyone who's been accused. Examples include; Ben Affleck, Casey Affleck, Ed Westwick, Jeffrey Tambor, Danny Masterson, Andy Dick, Dustin Hoffman, and fcking Mel Gibson. (Side note, these are just actors, for a wider list of men who have fallen since the Harvey Weinstein story broke in October 2017, I recommend you check out this article {https://goo.gl/Uq65Qv} by the NY Times) ⠀⠀IIIa. If you notice I have accepted someone who has been accused of sexual misconduct/harassment/assault please inform me right away, and ideally with a link to a news source from where you learned about (I will google it myself, but the ready-to-go link would be much appreciated.) ⠀⠀IIIb. Also, Alec Baldwin is on my list of rejected faceclaims. He's not been accused of anything, yet, but I'm not liking his defensive attitude of alleged rapists. Fúck off. Matt Damon also falls under subsection B, for a slightly different reason, but fúck him too. In this watershed moment, I have no time for defensive d i c k s and "not all men" a s s h o l e s.

⠀IV. The Challenge: a lot of us have certain fave fc's we use over and over again (I'm certainly guilty of that), so my challenge is for you to use a faceclaim you have never used before as your primary oc. This is gonna be based on the honour system, some of you guys I may know well, so I'll know if you're using your fave again, but others I may not, and I can't aggressively stalk everyone, so I won't call out anyone for not doing it. It's just a fun little challenge, worth 10 bonus points, if you opt to do it. But again, it's based on the honour system, I'm not gonna stalk anyone, but if I know you and you lie to me on the audition form. First, I'll be hurt, and second, I'll say sorry and tell you you're not getting those bonus points.

(I know, two sets of rules makes me such a di.ck, it's why I need your help guys!)

[carnoshin]

Slashers With A Magical Girl S/O

Prompt(s) provided by @galaxy-of-pastels, based off of Puella Magi Madoka Magica. I was in the fandom when I was younger, so excuse the length!!! 

((I know the cut won’t work on mobile, yet again, so I’m also gonna tag this as “long post.” soz))

(Also. Side-note that I think is funny: technically, all you need to become a magical “””girl””” is human emotions, so. Technically. These boys could make a wish. Too bad I can’t draw men, this seems like it would be fun to do;;;)

Jason

You probably assume that the famous “Jason Voorhees of Camp Blood” is a witch, so that’s how you end up there. Maybe you still have some hope left in you, maybe you’re trying to claim the territory.

Obviously, you’re surprised when the infamous Jason is... Well, he’s just himself. And he’s surprised when you walk off being gored. It does some serious corruption to your soul gem, but you’ve been through worse-- that’s what being a magical girl is, simple enough: not fun and seriously harming.

((As for the general relationship and the specific questions, lol))

Usually, in the Madoka universe, magical girls do not age unless spurned by their transformation (Godoka seems to be a few years older than usual Madoka, for example. Also, there’s a wish that basically splits someone into two people in the manga: it’s transformative, is what I’m getting at). If you are chronologically an adult and pass for an adult, you probably turned later in your teen years. 

Once you make your wish, your body is essentially dead: you’re a ghost possessing your preserved corpse.

Jason relates to that on a certain level, but he’s also vaguely worried about the fact that he is rotting. It becomes a very “monstrous alien or beautiful corpse” situation, if you’re familiar with that saying-- both are psychologically terrifying, but the one people prefer says something about them. That monstrous aspect is part of what drew you two together.

He’s caught off-guard by the idea that you could just. Disappear forever? Only leaving behind destruction and despair? Given the fact that you’re with him, he’s vaguely terrified what your Labyrinth could be like. He wonders if you would hurt him-- he deeply wants you to be able to come back to him, if you ever reach that point of corruption. (And no, he doesn’t care about the consequences.)

You have to leave fairly often to find grief seeds and he insists you leave when he “has to” commit his occasional massacre, in case it corrupts your gem even more.

Technically, only magical girls or kyubey can enter the witch’s labirynth without assistance. Everyone else is affected by either suicidal thoughts or illness. At first, it doesn’t strike him as odd: it’s just a group of teens coming up in the middle of summer, it’s not rare at all. But he finds himself being a bit more reckless than usual-- he’s practically making himself known at this point, no doubt as to whether or not he’s an urban legend.

(I would sincerely hope you don’t bring him into the labirynth: are you trying to get your mans killed?)

Most magical girls can go beyond their fully corrupted gem. (It’s implied that Homura never uses a grief seed after she gets herself set “right,” simply by supressing her sadness.) So if you come back from a fight and you’re particularly quiet, it can be even more stressing on your end when he tries to comfort you-- that release of emotion is what forms a witch, after all. Giving a matter of fact “I almost died” and leaving it at that is your best bet.

 If you became a witch, he’d feel so... Guilty? He’d probably be there to watch the grief seed “hatch” and might get caught in the resulting chaos-- emotion is a very strong thing with magical girls, so if you have lots of emotions for him... He could get sucked in. Once you are slain he just. Sits there. In the same place you were when he last saw you. The quiet of the house, the fact that all your things are still there... It just wrecks him.

(Lmao, did you think a Madoka post was gonna be happy...? Nah.)

Bubba

Again, you are probably there in the assumption that a witch is in the area. Most magical girls ditch Kyubey after finding out what he did to them, so you’re left trying to find them on your own-- not impossible, but certainly harder than just following the little rabbit-puppy-cat bastard. Witches do spread around violence-prone areas, so it’s not a terrible stretch of the imagination.

There very well might be a witch in the area. Though witches can move around, if you catch one early it’s likely to be in an abandoned place-- where magical girls tend to hang around. And, sure enough, there are lots of abandoned places around the Sawyer property. It’s not the best place to set up a base camp, however.

You probably wouldn’t be terribly friendly with the Sawyer family altogether-- probably just Bubba: his secret friend who comes by at night to talk with him. His “imaginary” girlfriend, if you will-- his brothers certainly call you that, at least.

Bubba doesn’t quite get all of the stuff around witches and rumors and familiars and all that. He thinks the soul gem is quite pretty: he can sort of see the resemblance between you and it.

He’s the most likely to take off with your soul gem on accident. It’s really pretty and, since it’s yours, he very much sees it as something precious-- not in the fact that it’s literally your soul so much as “this belongs to my lover. I keep it on me to remind me of them.” So you can see why that would be an issue.

There are a few events where he finds a grief seed nearby his house-- witch’s gravitate towards violence and death, so the Sawyer house isn’t an unlikely place for them to go. You frequently tell him to make sure his family is healthy and he starts to be a bit more “doting” around his family than usual, though it makes them upset at him.

He knows what your soul gem looks like. So he recognizes your grief seed immediately. And then he just... Loses time. He “wakes up” thirty minutes later, dangerously close to the woodchipper in the backyard. He remembers that you told him if he ever lost time like that, he should make sure he’s safe-- that his family is safe and relatively health. And after he does, just like you told him to, he remembers where he saw the little silver and black trinket that looked like your soul gem. And it’s just gone.

It becomes a regular part of his daily schedule to check over by the place he would meet you-- you on the opposite side of the fence that denoted the Sawyer property. You never come back, but... He’s certainly keeping his hopes up.

:(

Brahms

The Heelshire mansion is a good place for a base. It’s only a twenty minute drive from a major city; being an older magical girl, you have a type of authority that the other girls succeed to, so there’s very few territorial issues; there’s a hospital ten minutes away; no one ever comes by, so you can do as much magical stuff as you like without worry of being exposed. Etcetera.

Since your magic is so very advanced, as an “adult” magical girl, you probably end up making a kind of... Temporal space to disappear into. This is the main thing that interests Brahms about you: you enter a room-- one that he can see into and enter, if he so pleases-- but you’re never in the room. For a while, he considers that he might be going insane. Or perhaps you’re a ghost-- things he never believed in, especially because most assume he is a ghost.

He becomes terribly interested with you-- not even in a romantic sense, because he does have a kind of fear towards you: he truly thinks you’re a demon or a spectre-- perhaps a ghost from the witch hunts way back when, as you occasionally mention witches when you have a visitor outside the house.

He takes note of a type of creature outside the house that you seem to absolutely hate. He assumes it’s some strange toy, as he can just barely hear it speaking. One day, it mentions that someone else is in the house and before he knows how to react, you’re searching through the house with something shiny in hand. You never find him: he’s not a witch or a magical girl or anything of the sort, so he doesn’t show up on your radar.

When you go to sleep at night, he is so very careful about taking that lovely gem you seem to have. He takes it back to his room and leaves it there for further inspection. For the next two days, you don’t move even once. He even gets so bold as to check your pulse, shake your body to try to wake you. And then he hears that strange creature that you seem to hate speaking to him: he hasn’t the slightest clue how it got into the house, but he listens to it and returns your soul gem. He sits by your bedside waiting for you to wake up. Needless to say, you’re quite frightened when you do and see a man you’ve never seen before watching over you.

He listens very intently about your life as a magical girl. He’s seen you do such strange things. It only takes one single transformation-- to him it seems to only take a single blink, though you do go through the whole process-- to convince him. He’s not terribly afraid of you turning to a witch--- if you’re unhappy with him, it serves you right. (He... Sucks...)

The thing is, he won’t let you leave very often to get grief seeds. You’re always just on the verge of becoming a witch. If you’re lucky, you can convince some of the younger girls to give you “extra” grief seeds. They suggest you run from him-- plenty of them are homeless; it’s a norm for magical girls.

If you do become a witch, it probably happens in the manor. He accosts the girls who came to destroy your labirynth as soon as everything is over-- he’s awake and alert immediately after. The girls aren’t so kind as to give him your grief seed-- you were extremely difficult to beat, so they can’t just let the grief seed grow and destroy once again: you’d only get stronger and more dangerous.

He gets so lonely, so depressed. He doesn’t eat. He hardly sleeps. He becomes a husk of a man. He doesn’t die from grief, however, no. He has to go through the process of grief. All alone.

[ao3feed-hitoshi-shinsou]

Monoma's Type

Monoma's type by HelloYesHi

Monoma likes the new kid - updates might be slow cus i only write at school when im not supposed to FDJSSJDF

Words: 1199, Chapters: 1/?, Language: English

Fandoms: 僕のヒーローアカデミア | Boku no Hero Academia | My Hero Academia

Rating: General Audiences

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Categories: F/M, M/M

Characters: Monoma Neito, Shinsou Hitoshi, Kendou Itsuka, Tetsutetsu Tetsutetsu, Tsunotori Pony

Relationships: Monoma Neito/Shinsou Hitoshi, Kendou Itsuka/Tetsutetsu Tetsutetsu

Additional Tags: More characters, ill add them later soz, im writing this at school, Pining, monoma is gay, Fluff, Slow Burn, epic gamer, Shinsou Hitoshi is in Class 1-B, Monoma Neito is a Little Shit, Trans Monoma Neito, that wont be brought much if at all, sowwy

Read Here: http://archiveofourown.org/works/20833991