#like dick and jason

[navree]

i've said this before, but it bears repeating, if the new dc movies are going to start well into bruce's time as batman, then stephanie brown should either be the robin, or it should start with duke thomas's and a version of "we are...robin" and "robin war" (but without spyral or the court of the owls)

[sunriseovergotham]

characters have to be a little bit awful in ways that you cant defend. its good for the ecosystem. your honor he did do that. He did in fact do that

[arunneronthird]

he will use every chance he gets to be a drama queen and if he doesnt have one he will create one

[fanaticalthings]

Bruce Wayne except he texts like an ominous boomer

wdym you can't tell if he's threatening them?

Based on this post by @mysterycitrus :)

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Bonus:

Happy birthday, Tim 🥰

[ashrayus]

absolutely lost it over this fic by @neuro-psyche so. have this comic o(- (

go read it rn if u also love some Good identity reveal fic!!!!

[itsdabatt]

happy national impersonate your favorite vigilante day to those who celebrate

Part 2

[luca-is-a-pengu]

The real reason why none of the bat-boys are allowed in the kitchen

[goaheadandgetinthebog]

Several videos (independently) start circulating on the internet of the Waynes info dumping.

Bruce - the role of railways in westward expansion in the 1890s

Dick - clown eggs

Jason - tb and the New England vampires of the late 19th century, with reference to vampire literature

Cass - Paris sewer system

Tim - comparison of different camera lenses from different manufacturers, with model numbers

Duke - anti homeless architecture and how to remove it

Damian - cat declawing

After all this, a new meme forms.

'You must be this autistic to get adopted by Bruce Wayne.'

[stickyvoidpaper]

Dick : Jasons been more, relaxed lately. It's unsettling.

Tim : Yeah, I've started spiking his water with mood stabilizers.

Dick : What

Tim : I've been thinking of doing it to the wider gotham water supply. Think about the crime rates.

[excarow]

The joke that the bats see their contingency plans as a form of love is super fucking funny, don't get me wrong but honestly they probably do see it as that cause they just forget to say the second part out loud.

"after I've taken you down, obviously I'd find whatever made you like this and then find the cure."

They come from gotham where mind altering substances are basically everywhere. One of the most profound ways a gothamite could say 'i care about you' is admitting to having a plan to disarm/capture you in the case you go off the deep end, so that they could then get you a cure.

Unfortunately for the bats, no one else thinks like that cause what the actual fucks guys

[waveoftheocean]

wahoo finished this in time for superbat week day 5: tired dads!!

[bruciemilf]

“Cass should be Batman” “Dick should be Batman” “Jason should be Batman” the real question is: Who tf would wanna be Batman lmaoo

[fckbatmanhiskidsareminenow]

batfam meets the JL but it’s just the bat kids breaking into the watch tower during a debriefing or meeting to ask bruce the most mundane questions. they go about it like they’re interns that need to speak to the CEO during a board meeting. they walk over waving their hands and mouthing “i’m so sorry just need to ask batman something 😬” and then they lean over to bruce and ask something like “alfred wants to know if you’re gonna be home for dinner” and then they dip.

one of them started this when bruce didn’t answer their texts (it was probably tim or something) and now everyone does it.

[redsray]

my favourite part of the Wayne Kids being, you know, the Waynes, and popular celebrities is the fact that these are teenagers and young adults who are given ... celebrity powers. and i know they're stupidly petty with them. every time you log onto twitter you'd see 3 of them engaged in a sibling argument, completely uncaring that it's being broadcasted to thousands of people

Dick, tweeting: Tim stole my sandwich today, hey siri how do i un-adopt a sibling?

Tim: ??? I didn't steal your sandwich??

Dick: Then who did??? It was there this morning and you were the only one in the manor the entire morning??

Tim: Dick, my unfortunately kind of favourite brother, I was not in the manor today

Dick: YOU WEREN'T?!?!?

Tim: no, I've been in my apartment all week. did you hallucinate me?? LMFAO

Cass: I was there this morning.

Dick: Oh. No wonder then??? You 2 look too similar, one of you needs to cut your hair

Tim: Not it

Cass: . . .

Tim: on second thought, maybe it's time for a haircut

Cass: :D <3

Tim: Love you too, Cass

Random Twitter User, quote tweeting the last tweet: So did you ever find out who took Dick's sandwich????

Cass: Jay did.

Dick: JAY DID?!?!?

Cass: Oh. Did you not know?

Dick: NO?!????

Cass: Oh. @/jason start running. Sorry.

Steph: Guys Jason might deadass die again Dick is ONTO him

Random Twitter User: ... Again?

Steph: hardly the point rn, jared

Babs: Why did Jason just climb in my window asking me to hide him

Tim: he's running from Dick, lol

Babs: Oh, why?

Tim: he ate his sandwich

Babs: Got it, he's hiding behind my couch now, screeching about Cass betraying him.

Dick: BABS DON'T MOVE. DON'T LET HIM LEAVE.

[haveihitanerve]

I love how people are like Jason Todd was a demon child and all the other robins were angels compared to him like lmao robin!Jason was a fucking delight what do you mean

Dick showed up at the manor with a blue stuffed animal elephant and the rage of 100 men and the only thing thats changed is that the elephant is grey now

Tim showed up with blackmail on the fucking Batman and bullied him into accepting him as robin

Damian popped up on the doorstep holding a fucking katanna

Meanwhile robin!jason was jumping from building to building squealing robin magic! and would spontaneously hug Batman. he loved reading shakepeare knowledge and literally screamed golly jee willickers as the highest curse word in his vocabulary.

Robin!Jason was a goddamned fucking delight and all the other ones were the little demon children lmaooo

[neuro-psyche]

I think Dick and Jason would have multiple “what the actual fuck are you saying right now” with Tim and Damian when it comes to quality of life/monetary differences. Sure, Dick and Jason got used to Bruce’s “is $100 a good enough tip on a $30 bill?” shit, but hearing Tim talking about a new laptop he bought for $5000 literally is like a punch in the gut.

If they ever went on a cruise (which they totally wouldn’t because cruises are floating death traps), Jason and Dick would be in awe of the fancy amenities, where as Damian would be unsatisfied with the quality, since he grew up with every single amenity known to man. Tim would just feel like it’s all normal since the Drake’s were extravagant and travelled all over the planet.

Jason : My bedroom is bigger than my fucking apartment.

Dick : I could do a full gymnastics routine with the space in my room.

Tim :

Dick :

Tim : My room is normal sized…

Jason : You grew up in a mega mansion. I hardly think you’re the benchmark of a normal room-

Damian : I must agree with Drake. This room is frankly underwhelming.

Dick, staring wildly at him : What do you mean underwhelming- Dames there’s an aquarium wall in your room.

Damian : Yes. Underwhelming.

Jason :

Dick :

Jason : Do you want to-

Dick : Jump off the boat? Yes.