#ill just complain the whole time | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

roach-works · 9 months ago

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life update: a lot has changed and is continuing to change!

so, i moved to portland. i'll be going back to school in april (yay, community college) to get an associate's in Architectural Drafting, and until then im trying to get back into character illustration so i can start doing commissions again to support myself through the degree, since there isn't really much in the way of part time welding jobs.

the internet is a lot different now, and instagram's overwhelmingly slick and commercial-- incredibly intimidating to approach with the intent of building a following! i really want to dedicate myself to anthro art but im still chipping cautiously away at the very edges of the scene, on reddit and furaffinity and insta and... im not sure, bluesky? telegram? i know making money on the internet's always been tough, but i feel really bad for fresh younger artists right now-- the bar seems so high and complex! it's like if you can't hit the ground running, you'll get run over.

anyway this isn't a desperate lament, just an old dude preparing to get back into shape and whining the whole time.

#roach's kawaii life #ill do it #ill just complain the whole time

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newttxt · 8 months ago

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launching a rescue mission!

from utilities included, ch. 8

masterpost

#one piece #sanji #zoro #zosan #nami #usopp #helmeppo #koby #bartolomeo #other ppl but theyre just cameos #utilities included #DONT draw crowds. i suffered. i cannot explain. i didnt even detail that many crowd ppl but i was fighting for my life the whole time #blood sweat and tears. ill be complaining about this one for a while #BUT. IM SO HAPPY WITH IT?!#shoutout to emmie for helping me with the barto pose #and shoutout to bege for bringing a whole infant to a rager. my favorite detail that i added to please myself #anyway i learned i love drawing koby and barto

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frobby · 2 months ago

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mc when they go into a book and fuck shit up: why is the story different!!!

My brother in christ YOU CHANGED THE STORY!!!!!

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eobsinj · 3 months ago

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✨ marco bezzecchi - assen 2023 ( twt | ig | fb )

#im not really sure if this is assen bc they posted the photo during the break but assen was the race before the break so #i also added a scorpion tatto bc why not #as a multiple neck tattoo haver i think it looks cool he needs to get a neck tattoo #you can just tell by the amount of detail on this that i have a huge fat crush on bez #gonna draw him 2 more times (bc im biased) and then ill draw the other riders that i like <3 #i hate doing hair this way btw but it is my default style for it unfortunately #i complained the whole time i was doing the hair but the result was worth it #didnt think the hands would look good bc i generally suck at drawing hands thats why i didnt include them in my f1 art but well #seeing a lot of mistakes rn but i cant do anything about it now /sighs #marco bezzecchi #bezzecchi #bez #mb72 #bez 72 #vr46 racing team #mooney vr46 #assen #assen 2023 #assen gp 2023 #motogp #motogp fanart #motogp art #fanart #eobsinj #my art #colored pencils #traditional art

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infernal-house-demon · 5 months ago

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I wish there were more pride events for disabled and neurodivergent folks. I can’t do the parade anymore because it’s 1) a sensory nightmare and 2) difficult physically even on a good day. Even stuff like drag shows, which I love and enjoy, can be too overwhelming depending where I’m at.

Due mostly to pain flare ups this year, I haven’t gotten to go to a single pride event in my city or the surrounding area. I’m feeling distant from my queer community because the events that are running are either too costly or too inaccessible to me.

But people with chronic illness, chronic pain, disabilities, mental illness, neurodivergence—we still deserve to have community. We deserve to have space to share with our queer community and celebrate ourselves. And it’s just really disappointing that we so rarely get that.

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qoldenskies · 2 months ago

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FIRST DRAFT DEFEATED!!! its 54k words currently

#personal #canary continuity #i still need to lengthen/change some scenes #theres some long exposition in some scenes that should probably just be cut for like. the events #leading up to the important moment.#although i enjoy representing the overthinking/anxiety so i'll try to find a way to keep most of it #and a currently really important foreshadowing/thematic scene i want to make more subtle #originally there was going to be more than what i ended up with but most of the time when i complain about pacing its LITERALLY just me #also i need to cut some repetition that isnt intentional for the sake of showing the kind of. circular self-blame going on in d's head #because especially in the face of a psychotic break its intentional. but in some places i need to make things more abstract i feel #im kinda happy with most of the early scenes though. favorite to write was mikey... whats going on in your head little guy #i love the little unnerving ways it shows they are still actually CONSCIOUS beneath whats going on. like enough to resist it sometimes #itll get explained more deeply in the aftermath oneshot but thats why the change was slow and subtle #it was more an alteration of their thought processes/intrusive thoughts that slowly ate them alive #the progression felt normal for them #but notably raph actually is holding back the whole time and i think thats pretty interesting #and actually kind of horrifying LOL he couldve been so much nastier #anyways ill stop yapping now. youll see what i mean when im done #its a really powerful curse. i actually have a lot of ideas for the character responsible that explains why #and i even know the motive behind it. im still a little iffy about including her or making her a continuous threat but i Miiiight

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doll-fac3d · 15 days ago

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euuiuuegehh left leg nerve pain essay due in class tomorrow 40 minutes to finish it film project due in class right after also like 40 minutes to finish it oh its sooo over maybe

#film project is majorly my fault bc i didn t get all the parts done in time and im gonna have to crunch or. potentially fail #an 100p TEST GRADE (head in hands)#its ok bc something is better than nothing and im amazing in every other class so the worst i get is like a C...#but still #dear lord #at least im on track for the essay but im dreading it #only got the intro + beginning of first body paragraph done #praying and hoping #that bc i take so long to write essay intros and body paragraphs treat me better once i get tha ball rolling #that ill be able to finish in time #whole class tmrw is just finishing the essay so its not that bad but goddddddd #back to back #then the rest of my classes r fun for the rest of the day but dude T_T sigh....#sry i dont usually complain abt life this hard i doubt anyones gonna explode me for this but uueue im just sleepy LOL #i should get some kind of editing done before i go to bed but its midnight nooowweee #cosmyisms

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milkweedman · 2 years ago

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rly wish i could knit or spin while lying down bc my migraine is a little better when im lying down but then im bored out of skull. but if i try to do anything that involves raising my arms for more than a minute it is absolutely agonizing so unfortunately, sitting up in bed with the lights off and knitting it is

#occurred to me recently that it cant be normal for that to be the case #like if my arms arent by my sides then they need to be propped up on something or Pain #even worse if i have to hold them at shoulder height or higher #like reaching up to dust the corners of the ceiling or hammer in nails way above my head is so horrible #i cant keep them up for more than two minutes and its so bad the whole time #but even just keeping my arms propped up on my stomach while i knit while laying down ? cant do it. does not work #ill admit im describing this at least 50% in the hopes somebody else relates and has tips or info xD #other 50% is bc i like to complain #chronic illness #anyway am going to bed #and by that i mean im knitting

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nicklukenelson · 5 months ago

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Can we pretty please acknowledge how creepy the logan x Kendall plotline is for a second? That is a 25 year old sleeping with a barely legal adult. Under false pretenses ! Weird as hell.

#i just #its really pissing me off the amount of grown adults that dont find it weird #not to mention lamb and madison??? the hell is going on dude #get these late 20 year olds away from them !!#and i havent even mentioned the whole 'logan got so drunk he cant remember any of his conversation with veronica but had sex with kendal the #25 year old who was most likely sober' thing #i havent even mentioned that yet but i could oh man how i could #maybe ill give it the benefit of the doubt and say she arrived many hours after the party had finished and after he has sobered up some #still doesnt make her any less of a 25 year old but whatever #its the times its the times i know this is what u get for a 2000s show #but unfortunately i was put on this earth to complain so #logan echolls i will defend u on this one bud i got u #logan echolls #veronica mars #not to mention btw shes not even actually the person shes claiming to be while sleeping with him which is also weird but im not his parent

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discoshhtick · 10 days ago

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It's really interesting to me how varied the reviews on veilguard are - I've seen so many people praise it, talking about how amazing it is. Both new and old fans - but just as many people saying how terrible it is and filing for a refund after 2-3 hours.

I fall somewhere in the middle of that rn, I'm nowhere near the end of the game and have been disappointed by a massive pile of things in it - but also see some good in it still. I love the characters above all, even with some really, really painfully awkward and badly written dialogue. If all of the dialogue was that I would've probably dropped the game, thankfully there's both good and bad dialogue. Some of it works, while some absolutely does not.

Above all to me it truly does feel like a dragon age game bc I have to overlook a pile of jank to find the enjoyable bits LMAO, that for me has been the experience with all of the games

#idk man. Im still enjoying it despite it all #but then again Im actively fighting to get the utmost enjoyment out of it. Youll have to pry dragon age from my dead stiff hands #I will eat everything dragon age up when offered. I may complain the whole time but Ill eat anyway. and somehow find enjoyment out of it #veilguard livejournal #I had a text post tag but I forgot #Im going to save like. a bigger review for once Im done with it #bc I cannot really fully review the writing etc if Im in the smack dab middle of the story and character arcs #is anyone even reading these I have no idea nor do I care I just have to put my thoughts somewhere #dragon age #dav

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princessmyriad · 23 days ago

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#personal #it feels like im not allowed to complain about my own life on my own blog #or at least that if im allowed to that it seems very firstworld problem very selfish very not appropriate with all thats going on #that people will and do think less of me for expressing my own sadness and frustrations because theres no way it compares #to a lot of peoples very big and very real problems #but im so fucking sick of being poor and small. all ive had to eat today is 2min noodles roughly 10 hours ago #and all ill get tomorrow is a bowl of 2min noodles but ittl be another 15 or so hours until its the most reasonable to eat that #thats the real girlmath and then thats the last of my noodles. that leaves me with one (1) small tin of tuna #which might end up being tonights intermediary food if i really cant wait 15 nore hours for my next noodles but is supposed to be #the one meal of the day after tomorrow. so if i eat it too soon then i have even more time that i just dont fucking eat #im so sick to death of being in this position. like its literally killing me and theres fuck all i can do to make it better #ive tried. and i try and i try and i try but i can never afford anything #my landagent keeps sending me textx asking when theyll see a patment for my $50 water bill #i have to stop myself from texting back every time. youll see payment when im not spending literally 75% of my pay on rent alone #when i can afford to buy food and bills at the same time. whn i dont feel like kms-ing would be better than paying you my rent every frtnite #i crave a burger so bad i cant make myself do any tasks. i cant start or continue any crafts or chores because all im thinking about #is a burger like a blorbo rotating in my mind alongside the background noise that i wont get a burger and will only get noodles but not for #hours. a whole days worth of hours almost #my shitawful roomate is back and i have to play nice but he gives me the same feelings my abusive mother did. im scared to leave my room #in the safeplace house ive spent the last two years building for myself. this feels awful. things were all going so right and now #all of a sudden theyre all going as wrong as possible and im struggling so much. with no one to help. no one cares enough to help #the few people i do have are wrapped up in their own lives. which i get. but it doesnt take away the hurt of dealing with it all alone again #lot of momma trauma coming up with the end of eclipse season and i thought i was handling it. now i just feel fucking awful all the time #like ik healing isnt linear but the roomate triggers so hard things i thought i had processed and was on top of #would a burger fix that? no but itd atleast give me something to emotionally lean on for strength though it. but all ive got is noodles #24 hour apart one meal per day noodles. and tomorrow is my last pack. my only solace lately is that ive been invited to my first ever rave #or my first real rave anyway ive only been to one other 'edm event' that was not really a rave of any scale it was like 25 people #but its a halloween rave so im hoping for spooky fun dancetimes at least theres that. im out of data and spotifyprem so i havent been able #to take my silly little mental health walks bc theres zero chance im doing that without music and so itll be noce to get outside fr the rave #anyway. im doing very poorly i appreciate you few who reached out while i wasnt active but i expect ill continue to do poorly for some time

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windupaidoneus · 4 months ago

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this need for approval is a fucking disease it is absolutely mind boggling that i need feedback on what i say & post or my mind decides everyone takes a look at it & goes yep here goes this annoying freak again talking about his annoying freak things. & im not even like that with everyone. it literally does not fucking matter oh my goddd grow UP! im normal now. i understand my minds machinations. misto is nodding in approval at me

#i do not have this kind of insecurity with anyone in bitches. it is baffling that im letting it get such power on me elsewhere #i know its because of the difference in familiarity & like. knowing bitches much longer. & the fact we are from the same community #it is definitely a trust issue in this case but there isnt really a fix for it. except trying to get closer to everyone i guess?#but that would feel forced. i mean i love making friends & i love having close friends & i do not like feeling like this #but im also not gonna force friendships just so i can stop being insecure. its ridiculous conceptually #not that i have beef with anybody of course. just not sure anybody would care to get closer to me atm #considering what people have seen of me i would very much understand the opposite. not in a self conscious way #though that would be quite the opposite of how i personallt would react probably... my complexes #apologies for ruminating on my thought process in front of tha whole world to see but admittedly u did not have to read it.#i suppose ive gotten worries waap was mad at me in recent ish times but the thing w waap is that if theres an issue ill know #& like. waap & i are like two peas in a pod like they say... its presence makes me overall more comfortable & safe #damn. does it realise how important it is to me. emotional break im tearing up thinking about it fuckkk i love my friends #bahhhh okay anyway... i love my bitches. my god. ppl complain about that server's channel system #but its my beautiful maze where my beautiful friends are... & i can trust them so so much i have a channel for being a hater...#fukkkkckkck did i woke up sappy as fuck what is going ONNNN ahhhh i love mynfriedns collapses to my kenes #IS IT SO BAD TO WANT MORE FRIENDS TO LOVE JUST AS MUCH!!!! & TO TRUST AS MUCH!!

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carcarrot · 5 months ago

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they cant get rid of me that easily

#ok job update for those of you invested in this storyline #BEFORE this interview was even brought up or arranged. i thought i had the job and that it was going to be close enough to my current job #AFTER the interview it was clear i did not have the job and i would be contacted if i got it and also its way more involved than my job now #also i just really did not get the greatest vibes about the new job and the place itself.#theyre starting up but they dont seem to have their shit together #they also wanted to like. hire me as one thing but like have me essentially work different jobs as needed #which like. pay me more lol if youre giving more duties or responsibilities. you know #and while yes i complain about my current job theres good to it too. good pay for doing a job thats pretty close to not doing a whole lot #i value my goofing off time. its important #goofing off aside like it is good that i have moments when i can relax. or have time to do things like write my screenplay #which i should work on .#but anyway i know im making the right choice for what i wanna do. and this new job aint it #ill keep looking for better jobs but for now im happy in my often stupid but still good job #before i was cackling evilly abt the prospect of leaving here now im cackling evilly about staying #a very 'when you leave' sort of situation to tie it all together. anyway a crazy past couple of weeks that ive survived

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opens-up-4-nobody · 1 year ago

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#im just gonna complain abt it here bc i just have to accept that i can't irl bc no one else gets it #its hard to b a dyslexic grad student. u have to read so much. and its good. lots of reading is good. u just have to contend with a soul #crushing amout of discouragement at the fact u just kinda cant read while ur peers r like sure i can read this in class and have things to #say abt it. if u make me read in my head in class i literally cannot fucking tell u what i just read. not a god damn thing and if i try to #let my computer read to me i cant fucking pay attention for long enough so i just have to accept that from here on out ill have to #physically read papers aloud which i hate so much. its the only way i can fucking understand things and it still makes me feel dumb bc ill #somehow still space out while reading and have to reread like 4 times before i understand wtf is being said. it takes forever and it takes #energy and i dont like talking very much and it also restricts me to only being able to read at home which is frustrating #and im like i need to stop my brain from distracting myself with things that dont matter and my counselor is like: ur ocd is trying to make #work ur whole life and im like yeah thats how i got it. its the only way i can keep swimming with the non dyslexics #so its like wtf do i do? i kinda have to take the hit and make work my whole life rn. morn the loss of other things for a while #i dunno im still a bummer rn. like im probably coming off as more an asocial freak than normal bc its hard to talk ans maintain conversation #rn. but whatever. sometimes things just suck and theres nothing u can do abt it but accept it and move on. ill learn lots of things with all #the reading i have to do and that's never a bad thing ...no matter how much i dont give a fuck abt animals #like jesus. i could not even begin to give a fuck about like 95% of mammals. fish r cool tho. plants too #but microbes is where its at. i dont understand y ppl dont understand how cool they r. oh well ill just have to tell them #if i can find my fucking enthusiasm. ugh i have to make one of my classes read a paper and i have to work with someone abt find it. she #works with like rabbits. i refuse to assign a mammal paper. i fucking refuse. we will do plants or microbes or fucking paleontology #i will fight her on this. ugh. light filtering or orchid speciation would b perfect. annoying #at least i get to work with some culturs this week #unrelated

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halogalopaghost · 10 months ago

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#I'm having anxiety for some reason which is an unfamiliar physical feeling for me #I do depression and my SISTER does anxiety we're the mental illness brothers you see #but nooo apparently she has lent me some anxiety or whatever #anyway I was feeling useless and kind of like shit about how I never do anything anymore #and never get anything done or help around the house or even clean up my own living space #so I just decided I was gonna get out of bed at three in the morning and sweep the whole house #which like. that's fine I guess #and I wouldn't sit down or take a break even when I wanted to stop because I have got to!! start fucking doing things I can't just #be a lump that complains and consumes resources all my life #but anyway that was a bad idea or whatever bc my hands and feet got real hot and red and now I feel like I'm gonna frow up #I'm laid out on the couch near the phone charger. save me phone charger. charger for my phone save me #so what do we think am I feeling unwell from the activity because I don't do the activity enough or because I am just unwell #last time I swept a large area AND mopped was less than a month ago #I. also had to lay down after that actually except I was at work #just laid across a row of seats like yeah just. gimme a fuckin second to necromancy myself here #anyway #I'm a lil anxious bc of my neurology appointment I guess?? it's either that or the Wellbutrin #OR a yet to be identified food sensitivity maybe??#I actually have no fucking clue I just have a bunch of ideas ranked by plausibility #I'm. a little dizzy and the nausea is mcgetting me #farewell cruel world it's been nice knowing u

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bootyful-seventeen · 1 year ago

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hey y'all, anyone have any good stress relief tehniques or habits they'd like to share cuz I've been more stressed in the last 3 weeks then I was in the last 6 months

#to cut the long story short my mom had to sell the old house cuz her broke ass couldnt afford to keep it up #eventho it is a whole ass hoarders house and was in shambles with a flooded basement a collapsing ceiling in at least 2 rooms plus mold #and the stench a dirt and dog piss and shit all over the floor really made it worse then it was #but yeah so shes been staying with me and my grandma and its been awful #she hasnt been taking any of the medicine the doctors gave her when she snapped and started a fight and also started screaming at neighbour #so shes been terrorizing us here while the house has become her second hoarders den since she dragged so much crap here #my backyard side entrance and front porch are full of her shit and my grandma hates it since she can barely step into the house #so since she kept looking for places way out of her budget i had to go do house hunting since my useless sister is busy getting lit again #so ive been showing her shit in her price range that was under 420k cuz im not a moron who looks at 800k homes when i have 570k #and each time she has a new complaint saying its too expenive or its too small or its too old when she said she wants to do renovations #but shes saying she wants to renovate a newly renovated place instead of an old one #so i just showed her a house near my sisters uni and she liked the inside & backyard but she complained that 400k for newly renovated 3 bed #that is literally a 9 minute drive from my sisters uni is too expensive when shes the one who was looking at an old ass unrenovated bungalo #that is a street over from us that is 800k and she says it looks like garbage cuz an old lady previously owned it before dying #like no shit it looks old cuz older people lived those decades and like it and she just keeps doing her bullshit again & again #cuz when i tell you her mind is gone i mean it is GONE and she starts up all these wild stories to just explain some shit #like something goes missing? the neighbours are hungarian and stole it and left the hoard of junk in her old house #she has more stupid stories to harass and stress us out with but if im gonna share that ill have to write a book about it cuz fuck #and you know its bad when no one else can stand being in any contact with her cuz she starts screaming at people about it #so the only one who even likes her anymore is my sister and thats cuz shes deep in denial about just how insane she is & how abusive she is #so yeah i need some stress relief help that maybe isnt constantly hitting up maryjane cuz i dont do weed often especially since shes here #cuz weed 'burns your brain & makes you crazy like this' when shes the only one whos ever infuriated me to astronimical levels #i know retail therapy helped before she came here but i dont want to keep spending money i dont really have #it would be great tho but shes refusing to give me the 70k she said was mine from the house sale so i can cut her out for good

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