#i do not have this kind of insecurity with anyone in bitches. it is baffling that im letting it get such power on me elsewhere

[windupaidoneus]

this need for approval is a fucking disease it is absolutely mind boggling that i need feedback on what i say & post or my mind decides everyone takes a look at it & goes yep here goes this annoying freak again talking about his annoying freak things. & im not even like that with everyone. it literally does not fucking matter oh my goddd grow UP! im normal now. i understand my minds machinations. misto is nodding in approval at me

[kings-highway]

haikyuu ships but its things about their relationships or moments that I think would surprise their friends/teammates

starting off with my boys Daisuga: honestly definitely the rest of the team forgets that they haven't been together forever, and are never expecting when either of them are acting like, well, teenagers in a relationship. Specifically in regards to being shy in front of each other or wanting to impress each other, the rest of the team always is surprised by it because in their mind, like, why are you feeling insecure in this relationship I thought you've been dating for 2 years and Suga is just like "try 3 months BITCH now I need you to find out what his favourite kind of chocolate is I'll pay you real money if he doesnt realize why you're asking."

right along to Kagehina and honestly, literally even just realizing they have a normal relationship. I think everyone absolutely understands how they got together, but I imagine the first time ANYONE sees them out in public together they ALL have a moment thats like "oh shit they like... are actually dating" and every time Kagehina is just like... on a lunch date, or going shopping, walking a dog, just chatting. Like people are surprised that they genuinely spend time together outside of sports. The first time Kageyama goes with Hinata as his date to a family wedding the entire family is flabberghasted bc they definitely thought this was an on-court obsession only

Iwaoi is really simple, literally just people realizing that Iwaizumi has genuine romantic affection towards him is the funniest thing to me. There's a week where Iwaoi is worried bc Iwa had to go to school with a hickey on his neck but literally NOBODY bats an eye or even mentions it because "yeah Oikawa obviously-" but when theyre changing for practice and they see that Oikawa has a hickey on his neck the entire team goes feral and practically tackles Iwaizumi like "you committed to kissing him for that long?????? YOU?????" like they cannot comprehend Iwaizumi actively participating. (obviously this is also the only time they every see Iwazumi embarassed enough to visibly blush which only compounds things.)

Bokuaka's is so stupid but honestly - the first moment the team realizes that Akaashi is, like, attracted to Bokuto and isnt just his best friend that got carried away. Konoha catches Akaashi checking out Bokuto's ass as he's leaving the changing room and it legitimately ruins Konoha's day. What is he supposed to do with this information.

To be completely fair, Ushiten as a concept probably absolutely baffles the entire Shiratorizawa team for multiple reasons. I think though the obvious one is that the rest of the team cannot understand how little Ushijima is bothered by any of Tendou's antics, where Tendou is VRRY touchy and goofy and lots of PDA and affection and Ushijima is completely receptive and unbothered by it, if not going out of his way to intentionally make Tendou laugh to invite him to more. Like Tendou absolutely would sit on his lap during lunch and Reon would be sitting there losing his mind bc last time he sat too close to Ushijima he got a lecture on personal space. Oh, but now suddenly he's super chill and relaxed and nothing bothers him its tendou doing it.

Asanoya's is a little sad tbh but I think, specifically the second and first years, would be surprised by how serious Noya is about the relationship and how little he tolerates jokes about them being opposites/a surprising pair or any of that. Like theyre shocked to find out how seriously he's taking being a boyfriend and really trying to make sure Asahi is happy. The idea that it isnt superficial or just for fun for him is surprising to them.

Arankita - in a comedy of errors Atsumu accidentally finds out they they are ~no longer virgins~ and legitimately has to leave practice for 20 minutes. There's a piece of him, and the rest of the team, that had 100% believed Kita was a robot and they just.... the idea that this was something that happened organically and not for "procreation" doesnt fit in their worldview. Kita smacks the next person who brings it up and that ends the conversation.

[herejusttosufferalong]

Unpopular opinion:

I have never been more convinced of the plausibility of this ship than I do rn.

I know we all saw JD and EF at the same concert as N, and ngl, first thoughts were hmmm I do wonder? But then I considered this for a moment. Once again, another situation, where JD and EF and other friends are hanging out together, in constant communication and contact with each other. There is no separation. There is no pining. There is no impediment for N to be be romantically involved with any of these people. And yet she is continuing to post things that allude to being stuck in a decision, issues with external factors who wield control, being separated from someone you love, and finally hearing their voice again. She's flashing that ring unnecessarily; the ring we know represents Bridgerton and the tour and potentially someone on that tour. And A is posting minutes after her continuing her pattern of insecurity and clout chasing.

Then you have JVN posting his sleek bun video to his stories. Look, initially I was a huge skeptic about this kind of posting as trolling behaviour. But, I'm 100% convinced now. To not only post that video, with the words he chose and the smirks, but then to go one step further and mimic and mock A's posting kerfuffle. Pure bitchy genius. I'm living for this. And it begs the question, why troll this person if she isn't part of situation that deeply effects your friend? To me it's crystal clear.

I'm actually BAFFLED that anyone would be leaving the ship rn. We are literally being fed creamy cakes and hot tea. Sit down. Take a deep breath. And swear allegiance to your boss bitch Queen.

I know a lot of ppl think JVN is being shady with some of his posts, I personally don’t agree but everything else from N is pretty damn loud

[shotorozu]

what their wallpaper would look like while dating you

— *♡∞:｡.｡ 2k followers special —

character(s) : multiple (bnha)

legend : [Y/N = your name] they/them pronouns used, quirk’s not specified

headcanon type : fluff (x reader)

note(s) : okay so,, school has made me a little busy today so i kind of just whipped this up for no reason. this isn’t really lengthy but i hope you guys liked it :))

theres no proof read, again :,) but thats bc i was rushing on this one lol (will edit later)

»»————-　♡　————-««

midoriya izuku

i’m going to be honest, his wallpaper is going to change every single time you guys go out to eat. he takes so many pictures of you— it literally eats up his storage.

it came to the point that he made a collage of all of the candid pictures he took of you, and saved it as his wallpaper. that way, he wouldn’t have to change his wallpaper every 3 days

but he can’t help it! you’re just so,, attractive ❤️👄❤️ eventually, his mom will comment on how his wallpaper changes every single week— and that’s how he decided that “wait.. collaging exists!” and his life became 10x easier. but he still won’t delete the pictures so 🗿

bakugou katsuki

he has plenty of pictures of you that are nice, but he just won’t set it to any of those— you’ll never catch him setting his wallpaper as a good picture of you. but, katsuki will set it to a picture of you choking on spices, because he’s kind of a bitch lmao sorry

but he oddly likes that picture?? no matter how many pictures he’ll take of you, you’ll always find his wallpaper to be set to that picture, you can’t even do anything about it. you always stare at him like 🤨 when you catch him admiring the photo— “ITS NOT EVEN A GOOD PICTURE”

but GOD FORBID his parents actually coming across his wallpaper, he’ll get scolded by his mom because “Y/N WOULDNT APPRECIATE THAT, KATSUKI” and he’s just like 🧍 “it’s been that way for 7 months, old hag”

todoroki shouto

surprise! it’s a normal picture. it’s really just a picture of you and him at lunch, specifically your first date with him. and you looked SO good in that outfit. so, how could he not take 50 pictures of you in that one specific outfit? he must print them, and frame them properly

his head will peak on the phone’s corner, because, while he still wants to be in the picture, you’re the main focus SOOO,, yeah. he has other pictures, sure— but that one hits so differently

his mom and sister will end up coming across his wallpaper, when he was showing pictures of his class. they’ll basically fawn over every single detail of the picture. what more— when shouto outwardly says “yes. my s/o is so beautiful. how could i not have this picture as my wallpaper?” its cute

bonus : his wallpaper is sometimes a picture of you using your quirk. he loves how focused you look in that picture

kirishima eijirou

most likely, a picture of you resting your face against his arm. it’s such a confidence booster just seeing the picture— how could he not set it as his wallpaper? it makes him feel so manly

i think he has a separate album for that picture. an album with only one picture— yeah, definitely plausible for eijirou. it’s just such a good picture, how could he not have it’s own dedicated section? the picture never gets old to him.

he’ll also be that person that’ll have a really detailed background on why the picture happened. why, you may ask? it all started because of kaminari randomly asking him about it one day— and that was when he couldn’t stop talking he just loves flexing you, it makes him feel manly

kaminari denki

a picture of you sleeping— most likely a really ugly one, (to you, anyway) it’ll still be a nice picture to him, deadass <3

it’s a picture of you with your mouth half open, drool this 🤏 close from escaping your mouth. and your eyes are barely open— but enough to see the whites of your eyes. it was so funny to him that he just had to snap a picture.

regardless— it makes him feel better when he most especially feels insecure about himself, y’know, because everyone has those days. but don’t worry, you’re still absolutely beautiful to denki.

shinsou hitoshi

it’s a picture he snapped of you when he managed to get you in a position where you’re hanging upside down, wrapped in his capture tape. it’s quite a rare photo to anyone else that wasn’t him.

it’s his wallpaper because one, your expression is PRICELESS, and two— there was just so much to talk about, regarding the photo’s backstory. it’s also because of how cute your expression was, he could talk about it for days.

he’ll shamelessly set the picture as his lockscreen, and his homescreen. at some point, i think aizawa saw it too— but he thought nothing of it because “shinsou’s being shinsou again. i should let him.” everytime shinsou looks at his wallpaper, he can only chuckle— admiring it’s details (you can only glare at him💀)

iida tenya

i have included iida on this one, because i thought of it while i was brushing my teeth. LMAO SORRY, but his wallpaper would probably be your provisional license picture— or even a polaroid picture of the both of you

you stare at him, completely baffled “out of all of the pictures, tenya.” and he protests— explaining on how and why his wallpaper is just your provisional license’s picture, i don’t know! he was really shy when it came to taking pictures of you, so he resorted to using your license picture and it’s also a really professional picture of you so.. bonus!

but, if you do protest— he’ll set his wallpaper as a really blurry shot of you from afar🗿 due to the fact that he was literally running towards you when the picture was being taken. i also headcanon that iida isn’t really the best photographer, at least when it comes to phones.

monoma neito

its a picture of you crying while watching a sad movie 🗿 it’s not even full on ugly crying YET, but he does find it hilarious (but it’s also really pretty)

monoma forever holds it up your head, that “oh poor Y/N can’t hold in their tears for a movie” and he was going to use it for teasing purposes, but the more he observed the picture, the more he realized how good the picture is— like holy heck, it looks like an editorial shot from a magazine, and only YOU could do that.

class 1-b can only silently judge him 💀

»»————-　♡　————-««

likes and reblogs are appreciated, thanks for reading!

i do not own bnha/mha and it’s characters. boku no hero academia/my hero academia belongs to horikoshi kohei, i only own the writing and i do not profit off of my hobby

do not plagiarize, reupload, translate, or use my works for audio readings without permission

[outerbankspreferences]

Flight - Rudy Pankow

A/N: This makes Elaine out to be a bitch, but I don’t think she is. I support her and Rudy 100% and think they make a wonderful couple. It was more for the plot. 

Word Count: 1885

MASTERLIST

Flying had never been a problem before. You’ve never had to film anywhere that you couldn’t drive to. You had done some acting jobs around LA, and one time you went to Nashville before getting a part in Season 2 for Outer Banks. Netflix had offered to pay for you to fly out to North Carolina, but you opted for driving instead. You didn’t know anyone you were filming with, so you drove yourself.

Of course, you had been dreading filming in Barbados since you got the part. You had the biggest fear of flying and had been avoiding it since you were little. When you got the email from Netflix that contained your ticket to say that you were panicked was an understatement. Drew, Chase, and Maddie C. were already in Barbados, so it was going to be you, Rudy, Jonathan, Elaine and Maddie B. Everyone was just going to carpool to the airport. 

Rudy had a thing for you since he met you at the first table read for season 2. You were shy at first but quickly came out of your shell when you started to get to know everyone. Rudy thought you were hilarious and enjoyed your company so that’s what caused him to be knocking on your door the night before you guys had to leave for your flight.

 When you opened the door in your sweatpants and messy bun, he still thought you looked beautiful. “Hey, I thought you would be asleep.” Rudy spoke up and you moved to let him in your apartment. “Yeah well, I guess I’m a nervous flyer.” You laughed to yourself, “do you want a cup of tea?” You asked grabbing one of your mugs. Rudy had noticed your book and mug in the living room when he sat on the couch. “I hope I’m not interrupting you” Rudy spoke up as you walked into the living room handing him a drink. “No, you’re not, I just figured I’d pass the time until I fell asleep.” You responded, the both of you sitting on the couch. “I didn’t know you’re a nervous flyer, what did you do when you had to come to North Carolina?” Rudy questioned. “Uh, I drove.” You shrugged like it was the simplest thing to do. “What, that’s like a 3-day drive.” He said baffled by your answer. “Well yeah, but it’s a good way to see the country.” You laughed thinking about the memories you made on the solo road trip. “And you did it by yourself? That’s badass Y/L/N.” Rudy said smirking.

 The two of talked the whole night away and you showed him pictures of your trip across the country and told him all the stories. Rudy thought that he could listen to you talk all night, even after he started to get tired. He finally excused himself from you place promising to sit with you on the plane tomorrow to ease your mind.

 You woke up the next morning with a sick feeling in your stomach and it only got worse at the thought of getting on an airplane. You got the rest of your last-minute things packed up and brought out by your door getting ready to meet everyone at JD’s car. You were the last to show up when Elaine shouted out to you. “I thought you weren’t going to show.” She spoke with a snarky tone, and Rudy nudge her shoulder getting her to knock it off. “Yeah, well I’ll probably be late to my own funeral.” You laughed trying to ease the tension. You guys all piled in the car and Elaine took the opportunity to sit next to Rudy and made you sit in front with JD, while Maddison sat in the back.

Elaine also had a thing for Rudy and didn’t enjoy you showing up to take his attention away. Everyone thought they were going to get together after season 1 but it never happened. Then you came along, and Rudy pulled all his attention to you. Elaine wasn’t too secretive about her hatred towards you, but you just brushed it off as a mild insecurity and jealousy. You weren’t angry that you had to sit up front but instead talked to JD and tried to ease some of your nerves. No one else knew that you were a nervous flyer and you preferred to keep it that way. Even though it was something simple, you were still embarrassed.

Once you guys got to the airport the nerves got even worse. Because of the pandemic you guys had to wear mask and you also had sunglasses on, so it was hard for people to recognize you guys. Rudy helped you carry your bag into the airport and then guided you to TSA. “Have you ever been in an airport?” Rudy asked whispering in your ear so no one could hear. “Uh once when I was little with my mom. We had to pick up my grandma.” You responded. Your eyes darted around to all the people and different screens and you started to get overwhelmed. Rudy could sense that you were started to get anxious and put a hand at the small of your back pulling you closer to him. “We’ll get checked in and then go get some air, okay?” He explained grabbing his passport and paperwork. You pulled yours out of your purse and laughed when he saw that you had everything in a little Ziploc baggy. “Alright, that’s the most mom-like thing I’ve ever seen” he said.

 Rudy helped you get through the process of security and then you guys were about to go outside when Elaine spoke up, “where are you guys going?” She asked almost annoyed of you guys leaving. “Y/N/N and I are going to find the bathroom. Safety in numbers.” Rudy fibbed, pulling you along. Once you guys got outside the two of you sat on a bench close enough to your gate that you wouldn’t have to rush when your flight got called. Rudy watched your body relax a bit when you weren’t stuck inside.

 “It’s going to be okay Y/N/N.” Rudy spoke pulling you to sit on the bench with him. “I know, I know.” You said half trying to convince yourself. “I’ll be next to you the whole time, and we can just talk, or you can read your book. It’ll be over before you know it.” He spoke and put a hand on your shoulder, and he could feel your breathing increase. He knew what was happening, you were about to have an anxiety attack, “okay Y/N, you need to take a deep breath.” He rubbed small circles on your back. “I can’t do this Rudy; I can’t be in that death box for over 11 hours.” You spoke and your voice starts to shake. You look over at Rudy and he’s got a concerned look on his face. He takes your face in his hands forcing you to look at him, “you’re going to be okay Y/N, I’m going to be with you the whole time. Nothing is going to happen, just please take a deep breath.” He spoke firmly but you could feel the softness of his hands. “You promise?” “Of course, I would never let anything bad happen to you.” You nodded your hands in his grip, but he didn’t let go and you could feel his hot breath on your face. Rudy was looking into your eyes and then his eye flicked down to your lips and you could feel yourself getting nervous again but this time it wasn’t the flight, but because of how close Rudy was too you.

 Rudy leaned in closer, and you let your eye flutter shut. You felt Rudy gently place his lips on top of yours and you pushed yourself closer to him to deepen the kiss. It that moment it felt like you were on cloud nine, as if it were only you and Rudy left in the world. Rudy pulled away and left you smiling like and idiot. “I’ve wanted to do that for a while now.” He whispered, and you kissed him again. “Me too.” The two of you giggled and then heard your flight get called. “Just remember, I’m here the whole time.”

When the two of you got back to the gate the others had already boarded expect for Elaine. When Rudy saw her, you could feel his grip on your hand tighten. “There you guys are, what took so long?” She asked seeming annoyed. “The just called for the flight, we’re not that late.” You spoke up, and Elaine rolled her eyes at you. “I saved you spot next to me Rudy, Y/N can sit next to Madison.” She explained pulling at Rudy’s arm. “Uh that’s okay, Y/N is kind of nervous so I said I would sit with her.” He explained trying not to be rude. Elaine scuffed, and the three of you boarded the plane. You were sat right behind Maddie, JD and Elaine, “here take the window seat, it’ll make it easier on you.” He said stepping to the side so you could get in. The flight attendant was giving the inflight instructions, explaining how to put the oxygen masks on and your leg started to shake. Rudy noticed and put his hand on your thigh, “it’s okay, they have to explain all this stuff Y/N/N.” He whispered in your ear kissing your cheek. You nodded in confirmation and soon enough the pilot was getting the plane ready for take off.

As the plane started to gain speed and lift in the air you watched out the window, and Rudy got you a drink of water for the flight. You guys had been flying for about an hour and you were looking out the window but Rudy’s grip on your thigh never left. He was talking to JD, when you guys hit some turbulence. You jumped and clung onto Rudy’s hand, “nervous flyer Y/L/N?” JD asked not missing the way you reacted. “I don’t know why she would take a job like this if she’s scared of flying. Kind of stupid if you ask me.” Elaine piped in making you feel embarrassed. “It’s not stupid Elaine, everyone is scared of something.” Rudy said defending you. “It’s fine babe, just a bit of turbulence.” He said and you blushed at the nickname. “Can we listen to music or something, I think I just need a distraction.” You asked, and Rudy pulled out his headphones.

“Thanks.” You spoke, not really knowing what to say to him, “I owe you big time.” Rudy laughed, “it’s no problem. When we get to Barbados you can self isolate with me if you want.” He responded. “I hope I’m not being to forward, but I’ve had a crush on you for a while now, and I’m going to assume you feel the same for me.” He explained. You did have feelings for Rudy, you always had but you kept your distance because you thought he had a thing for Elaine. “I would love too self isolate with you. it would be much better then doing it alone.” You said leaning in to kiss him. “And yes, I like you too.”

TAG LIST:

@lemur46 @drewstarkeysbitchh @taylathornton

[masterthespianduchovny]

There are unexplored layers to Ted forgiving Rebecca after she confesses.

And I didn’t realize this until rewatch because Ted is kind and he doesn’t believe that anyone is too far out to be forgiven and redeemed.

But watching that scene a second time, I noticed how genuinely hurt Ted is. Or, at least, it sticks out more to me this time. Ted’s eyes are watery and he looks around as he’s processing this information, but he’s truly hurt.

And it’s not because he sees the best in people or because she was that good at hiding her true motives. Ted did see Rebecca. Not the facade she put on for others, but a person who is honestly kind, caring, and fun.

He saw how little Rupert made her feel and that he constantly belittled and insulted her. Ted saw how Rupert used his power and influence to undermine her.

All throughout their interactions he was clued into the fact that 1. No one has checked in on Rebecca 2. Rupert is punishing her for leaving 3. Rupert was verbally/emotionally abusive 4. She supported him without being asked and because she was genuinely concerned.

There’s a lot of shit, okay. Ted witnessed and observed a lot.

And it’s such a small moment, but when she calls herself a bitch, Ted looks baffled by the label. He cannot comprehend viewing Rebecca as such a thing because he doesn’t and didn’t see her as one.

Then Rebecca spills why she’s a bitch and ted is shocked and processing everything. Being hired as AFC Richmond’s manager was one of the greatest things that ever happened to him and it was all so he could fail in order to hurt Rupert?

Like, I really want to stress that Ted saw Rebecca. Who she is around Rupert isn’t really Rebecca and ted immediately gets that. He spent weeks getting an understanding of who she is, so when he sees Rebecca become meek, hesitant, and insecure, Ted knows that his infidelity wasn’t the worst of his actions. He sees that Rupert is cruel, mean, and vindictive. He sees a man who gets away with almost everything as Rebecca takes the blows.

Ted understands why Rebecca has those fences up.

And I think her hot and cold nature makes sense to him in that moment. One moment Rebecca is very supportive and receptive to him and the next she closed off and prickly. All that support wasn’t fake.

So when Ted is combing through his hurt, everything starts to make sense. Then there is the fact that he is seemingly the only person who asked how she was doing. Ted was the only person to do a lot of things for her without expectation or throwing it back at her.

This was the same woman who revealed that her ex husband said she’d be alone if she left and admitted she felt that way. And who could blame her? No one checked in on her and everyone is charmed by Rupert.

Like, yeah, he relates to her acting unlike herself due to divorce, but also, with all he’s seen and heard, Rebecca needed compassion despite her actions. He wasn’t going to leave and have her be alone again. He wanted to show her that she was loved, cared for, and that someone was willing to stand by her side despite her missteps.

And just like ted wouldn’t quit on Rebecca after her apology, she didn’t quit on him after that loss put them in relegation.

It’s something about Rebecca allowing herself to be so vulnerable—the nakedness and the rawness of it all—and Ted’s forgiveness making her feel safe and valued for who she is, mistakes and all that truly transforms her.

In a sense, it transforms both of them.

Ted’s capacity to forgive her is what allows Rebecca the capacity to forgive Higgins and, in return, ask for his forgiveness.

[tarysande]

Follow the...

wardrobe department?

A tale of dissecting the chronology of a trailer (in which chronology is made up and the voiceover definitely matters—but doesn’t always align).

LUCIFER SEASON 5 TRAILER SPOILERS AHOY.

Me: I avoid spoilers!! Don’t spoil me!!

Also Me: Hark! Is that a trailer I see before me?? Better analyze it frame by frame!

So, the truth is, I don’t know most of the other BTS stuff and I really don’t want to. I haven't seen the episode titles. I do know Neil Gaiman’s not ... reprising his role. I’m going on ONLY what’s in the trailer, so some of this speculation may already be wrong.

First: a moment of AWWWWWWW YEAAAAAHHHHH because I’ve wanted Twin!Michael for years.

Okay. Moving on.

Trailers are not chronological. They are magic tricks, designed to manipulate their audience.

Now, chronologically, the crime scene with Ella is at (or very near) the beginning because I’m preeetty sure the victim is Mr. Said Out Bitch (RIP; obviously they did not think they were getting a S6!). It’s hard to make out exactly what Chloe is wearing. Dark jacket, dark shirt with a t-shirt-like collar.

Okay, we know this is Lucifer; we know this is what he was wearing when he went to Hell. Very, very, glowing in the black light white shirt. This could be at the beginning? We assume it is because of how it’s placed right after the goodbye from s4, anyway.

Look how haggard he looks. Like, Lucifer. You need some sleep, buddy. Those dark circles have dark circles. My heart hurts.

Okay wtf, my heart hurts here, too. We assume that Chloe’s pajama(?) stakeout and drinking/dancing and her looking up (and looking super sad on what I think is Lucifer’s balcony) are part of the “since you’ve been gone (everything sucks)” montage. 

I will say it’s very possible that “shots at the bar” happens after “crime scene with Ella.” Chloe’s wearing a black jacket and Maze’s arm is bare. Perhaps this night of drowning sorrows (again) is what leads to the conversation (the next day, I think) between Chloe and Maze (“We don’t need him”). In that scene with Maze, Chloe’s wearing a pinstripe blazer and grey t-shirt. Which is important, because that’s the outfit she’s wearing here (in what I would guess is Mr. Said Out Bitch’s home):

I know the assumption is that this is Michael. Although, I wonder how Michael knows the crime-solving Devil song, and the mannerisms (tugging on the sleeves, “Hello, bad guys” as he strolls in) are definitely Lucifer’s. As is the outfit, which is a perfect mirror of the one Lucifer wears in Hell: black suit, white shirt with texture, red pocket square. (Also, no evidence of Michael’s injury.)

Other questions: If he’s so good at playing Lucifer here, why isn’t anyone taken in by him when the grey sateen shirt (hold that thought) appears? Where has Michael been? Why is he here now?

So, I think it’s the combination of his non(?)-reaction to Chloe kissing him and the expression on his face that Michael this up, right? That it’s shown while Michael is voiceover monologuing is also an indicator (but could just as easily be a misdirect because Michael’s not speaking in the image in front of us, and it’s not like we’ve never seen Lucifer make this kind of face before).

(Incidentally, the non-reaction to the kiss could also be seen as in-character for Lucifer; he can’t be sure of his reception, which also plays well with his hello-bad-guys/cocky-to-cover-insecure entrance.)

If it is Michael in the shooting/hug scene, he may START by playing Lucifer perfectly, but that degenerates.

We know this is Michael. There’s some evidence of Michael’s injury in the unevenness of the shoulders. It is NOT a white shirt. It is a grey shirt with a bit of shine; sateen, if you will. We’re going to see a lot of this shirt.

Michael: grey sateen shirt. Also, Chloe’s wearing the white and black striped (VERY FUNNY, COSTUMING DEPT.) shirt she’s wearing when she tells Linda that Lucifer is acting different—so we assume this is the day(?) after Michael shows up. (There’s also a slight possibility that his Lucifer 2.0 bit is his introduction.)

Michael. Black wings. TINY STRIP OF GREY SHIRT at the wrist. So, we assume this happens right after the previous Chloe-with-Gun moment. Michael might want to mess with his brother, but he doesn’t want Chloe to die—there’s even some protective head cradling. So. There’s that.

Michael. Lux. Still the grey sateen shirt. Important: Amenadiel is wearing a shirt and tie. 

In the bit where he’s (presumably) talking to Lucifer in Hell (“He’s stronger than you think.”), he’s wearing the same Lux-grey-sateen-shirt-Michael suit and tie. I’m guessing Amenadiel was like “Do not pass Go, do not collect $200″ and pops down to Hell ASAP.

The “He is stronger than you think” line also makes me wonder if Lucifer hasn’t worried—or even thought—about Michael because he believed his twin was broken beyond the possibility of being a threat (presumably by Lucifer; I think there’s a Rebellion-related, bad-blood, mutually-assured-destruction story behind Michael’s injuries). That hubris/pride is pretty much what gets Lucifer into 925% of his problems, after all, so it would be in character. 

Oh, Luci. Why do you assume you’re the smartest in the room? Soon that attitude may be your doom. 

Michael is ALSO wearing the grey sateen shirt when Maze shows up and he admits he’s not Lucifer. A lot happens on the day of the grey sateen shirt. To me, this means everyone’s onto him right from the beginning. Also, it means the trailer is pulling pretty heavily from just this one out of the eight episodes. The first episode, unless I miss my guess.

Now, going by wardrobe, we enter a very jumbled section. We’ll call this the Dark Days of the Turtleneck.

During the Dark Days of the Turtleneck, we see Michael fight with Amenadiel in the time-stopped precinct. One assumes Michael’s not even pretending to be Lucifer anymore because ... turtleneck? Bloody hell, might as well be board shorts and Crocs. Note: Michael is NOT wearing (Lucifer’s) ring, here.

Again, the voiceover is misleading because suit-and-tie Amenadiel in Lux and Hell wouldn’t have had a chance to fight (wearing a red jacket) with Turtleneck Michael yet.

At yet another point, we see grey-knit Amenadiel fight with zip-up-halter Maze. Whatever’s going on, Amenadiel is getting around (on different days). And apparently everyone is mad at him.

Okay, so this happens after Michael’s had time to “make a mess.” Of what sort, though? I mean, the penthouse looks fine, so ... what haven’t we seen? What has happened between grey sateen shirt Michael and brown blazer turtleneck Michael? Note: Michael’s also not wearing (Lucifer’s) ring, here. I think Michael’s true lack of fashion sense is turtlenecks and roomy blazers. Yikes.

Well, we assume it’s a mess of Lucifer’s life on earth ... but is that possible? All the evidence points to pretty much everyone knowing sateen-shirt Michael isn’t Lucifer right away, so how could he have had the time or the leverage to make a mess that involves them? 

And if Michael doesn’t mean he made a mess of Lucifer’s life on earth, does he mean a more far-reaching mess? A much older mess? Something celestial? Something involving Hell? Something involving the Rebellion (have they seen each other since?)? Something involving God? Something involving whatever or whoever the REAL Big Bad of the season is (because I really doubt it’s Michael)?

How long has Michael been ... watching? stalking? Lucifer? Has he been involved in any of the other stuff that’s happened over the years? Was he the one who let Mum out of her cell?

But MOST IMPORTANT: How does he know the crime-fighting-devil song????

Well, whatever that mess is, Lucifer’s pretty pissed off about it. 

White shirt, white wings is Lucifer (he was also wearing his black jacket, but not a red pocket square. Note: he has had time to remove his jacket and put his wings away before throwing a punch!). TRAGIC turtleneck under a blazer (with different-colored trousers) and the obvious injury is Michael. But it’s not grey-turtleneck Michael—more than one turtleneck, how dare—so we’re at a different time, chronologically speaking. Could be before Michael’s precinct-fight with Amenadiel, even; we don’t know the chronology of those turtlenecks. We just know Michael, for some unknown reason, chooses them. 

Later:

Okay, I think these two scenes happen in the same episode; Chloe’s outfit is the same. And I think that episode happens a bit later in the chronology. Why?

‘Cause Chloe doesn’t have bangs, yo. And anyone who’s tried to grow out bangs can tell you IT DOESN’T HAPPEN OVERNIGHT.

Head-scratching brown suit aside, that’s Lucifer and not Michael. Because this has to be after Michael has shown his true turtleneck colors. Lucifer also seems to have trimmed down his post-hell angst-beard. 

Chloe’s hand-injury is probably from that explosion. Her heart-wrenching anguish, though? I don’t know what caused it, but my hurt/comfort-loving little heart wants it now.

We have no idea what Michael’s doing at this point: we don’t see Michael with no-bangs Chloe.

Which leaves the scenes that have had Twitter freaking out for most of the day:

This might be after black-shirt-Chloe-anguish-explosion. I know it looks like bangs, but I think it could also be hair-pushed-behind ears; in the shot where you see her standing in front of the elevator, her “bangs” look long enough to be tamed into a no-bang ponytail. But then ... no hand injury. 

It could also be a dream (looking at you “Love Handles”) or a Hell-torment. 

In any case, it is 1000% Lucifer and not Michael. Every single moment of every single micro-expression is entirely That Look Lucifer Only Gives To Chloe Decker (I wrote a thread about this on Twitter today), and Michael is just NOT that good an actor.

I actually find this shot more baffling. It’s Lucifer’s shirt; it has men’s-shirt buttons. Is it a morning after? (But not the morning after the wall scene, because Lucifer was wearing a black shirt there.)

Is this a dream?? A HELL TORMENT?? Look, I just do not trust anything that looks like something the fans have wanted so badly. We were all there for elevator dream sex and Lucifer wing dream reveal. We know how these people work!

(Granted, they also sometimes give us axe scenes and beach kisses, but...)

I have about 32634 things to say about LIGHT AND DARK TWIN BROTHERS IS EVERYTHING and also FURTHER EVIDENCE OF QUESTIONABLE CREATION/PARENTING, but I’ve already been working on this for hours, and that screaming is, I think, best reserved for another post. 

In conclusion, ahh the sweet, sweet song of hyperfixation. I missed you, buddy. You and your neurotransmitters. Welcome back.

For now, I’m just gonna tricycle off to hell in anticipation of August 21st.

.

.

.

Guys, seriously, how the hell does Michael know the crime-solving-devil song???????

[detective-with-one-arm]

♛ Hurt someone out of jealousy

✿ Refuse someone’s kindness or affection

☢ Kill someone close to them for the greater good

Vanilla!Rachel

♛ Hurt someone out of jealousy

Not on purpose. While she doesn’t really get jealous, there is the smallest sharp prick in her chest. But she keeps that shit to herself and supports her friends and loved ones no matter what. She would honestly rather die than let her jealousy leak out and affect her relationships.

✿ Refuse someone’s kindness or affection

Most of the time, no. She’s generally a very affectionate, patient, and kind person and is typically the one who initiates it. But if something has happened and she’s been hurt by someone, she’ll need some time away on her own before she’ll accept anything from them and if it comes across as hollow and selfish, then she will reject it.

☢ Kill someone close to them for the greater good

I was hoping someone would ask this.

Because the thing is...she would. She wouldn’t want to. She would do absolutely everything in her power not to. It is the last thing in the world she would ever want to live with doing. But if there is no other choice and no other way out and if either they or someone holding them captive was so dangerous and was causing so much harm to people that the only way to stop them was to either kill or allow them to kill someone close to her...she would do it.

And it would haunt her for the rest of her life.

It would destroy her.

Siren!Rachel

♛ Hurt someone out of jealousy

She more just gets really clingy and sad. Like, she would never hurt someone out of jealousy, but she might make them feel kinda guilty. Not on purpose, but she’s been alone for pretty much her whole life and once she has friends, she tends to get really attached to them really quickly. Even more so if she finds a mate. So she’ll more do the whole ‘you don’t want me anymore...?’ sorta thing. But this is nothing some soft reassurance can’t cure. She’s just lonely and insecure and doesn’t really know better.

✿ Refuse someone’s kindness or affection

Never. She cherishes her friendships that she gains and would never take their affections or kindnesses for granted. This does make her a bit naïve and too trusting and forgiving for her own good, but she doesn’t really know better. All she knows is that she wants her friends to stay.

☢ Kill someone close to them for the greater good

She would literally rather die.

Sea Naga!Rachel

♛ Hurt someone out of jealousy

Oh, definitely. She doesn’t really attach herself much to someone emotionally. But when she does, she can definitely have a selfish streak. If that person seems to prefer someone else’s company to hers, she’ll be rather irritable towards her chosen partner and will do just about everything to keep them to herself. And if they somehow separate from her, she’ll probably end up hurting the person getting more of her partner’s attention.

✿ Refuse someone’s kindness or affection

She wouldn’t...refuse it, exactly. She would more just be confused by it. Not that she’s particularly soft or anything, she would just be baffled as to why anyone would show her kindness. It’s neither a negative or positive feeling, it’s just confusing as shit.

☢ Kill someone close to them for the greater good

She doesn’t really...care about a greater good. She just exists in a state of self-indulgence. That being said, if someone did manage to get close to her, she would never want them dead. She might hurt them if they do something that genuinely angers or pisses her off, but she would never kill them.

Ichthyocentaur!Rachel

♛ Hurt someone out of jealousy

No. She would never hurt someone out of jealousy, but she doesn’t get as clingy as Siren!Rachel probably would. Maybe a little dejected, but she would let her partner or friend do whatever they’d like. She would just sort of sit on the sidelines and wait for them to come back and give her attention. She’s already shy and tends to keep her distance, but once she actually makes a connection with someone, she’ll be around them more, but she won’t really hold onto them if they’d rather maintain their distance. She’d feel too shy to say anything.

✿ Refuse someone’s kindness or affection

She’s already hesitant to approach people as is, so she would be hesitant to accept anything from anyone. But if someone she knows and it decently familiar shows her kindness and affection, she would accept it reluctantly.

☢ Kill someone close to them for the greater good

She would probably run away rather than have to make the choice. She doesn’t really have a concept of ‘greater good’ and more just is concerned about immediate self-preservation. She’s not really a fighter or a hunter, so she would probably run away first. If someone close to her died because of this, it would probably upset and devastate her for a good while.

Pirate!Rachel

♛ Hurt someone out of jealousy

She definitely has a bit more of a jealous streak, but she wouldn’t do anything to someone else out of jealousy. After all, she earned her position as captain not by being a spiteful bitch but genuinely gaining the camaraderie of the crew and then culling down the former captain that inspired mutiny and skullduggery within the crew. She’s become quite the diplomat growing up with the scurvy crew, so she’d know how to communicate with her partner how she feels and if she trusts them, so long as they’re honest and she knows they aren’t afraid of being honest, her jealousy isn’t something to worry about. In fact, she finds something kind of attractive about a partner who likes making her pay attention to them. It’s kinda hot to her. At least, so long as her partner knows that’s what they’re doing.

✿ Refuse someone’s kindness or affection

While she’s figuring or sussing someone out, yeah, probably. Despite how tightly knit she is with her own crew, even she has a healthy amount of skepticism towards them and takes things offered to her with the utmost caution. With someone she doesn’t know too well, that increases by tenfold. But once she’s absolutely sure about someone, she actually enjoys it, not that she’ll let it show in front of her crew. She may be about fun and adventure and revelry and camaraderie, but she doesn’t let them think she’s soft.

☢ Kill someone close to them for the greater good

The most ‘greater good’ she really cares about is her crew and her ship. Maybe even some of the towns she’s stopped at that she really likes and is on good terms with. With her history and her having to usurp the previous captain, she would not hesitate to take someone out if someone she’s invested her resources and trust in became a threat. She would put them down in an instant and make an example of what happens when you abuse her trust and her generosity.

Putting the rest of these under a cut because this post is already long and it’s gonna be even longer.

Vanilla!Howard/Collector!Howard

♛ Hurt someone out of jealousy

Most definitely. And he would do it in a really sneaky and underhanded way. This man is really good at manipulation and getting right to the emotional wound that will sting the most to ward someone away from his object of obsession affection, including gaslighting.

✿ Refuse someone’s kindness or affection

I wouldn’t say he would refuse someone’s kindness. Affection, definitely. He’s not really an affectionate or intimate person, but he won’t refuse kindnesses shown to him. But accepting them means absolutely nothing to him.

☢ Kill someone close to them for the greater good

He does not care about a ‘greater good’ nor does he really consider anyone ‘close’ to him, but there are no lengths he won’t sink to to further his own goals.

Siren!Howard

♛ Hurt someone out of jealousy

Oh, yes. He most certainly would. If his catch somehow has someone else that would either be looking for them or they somehow manage to escape to, Howard will not hesitate to make sure his catch knows that they’re his and that that’s not changing. Though, he might not just hurt or kill the other. He might just be tempted on capturing them, too, and depositing his brood in them, too, and force his initial catch to watch. Just to make a point.

You and everything you have is his.

✿ Refuse someone’s kindness or affection

He doesn’t really care about either of these things. That being said, if his catch was doing kindnesses and being affectionate towards him, even if it was against their will or out of fear, he won’t refuse it. He takes great pleasure from it and it boosts his ego.

☢ Kill someone close to them for the greater good

Once again, he does not give a shit about a ‘greater good’ or even has a ‘greater good’ to care about. He operates entirely out of self-interest. However, if someone were to harm (at least from his perspective) his catch, he wouldn’t hesitate to put them down.

Ichthyocentaur!Howard

♛ Hurt someone out of jealousy

He will stomp them to death with his hooves. Nobody touches or even goes near his catch.

✿ Refuse someone’s kindness or affection

When he puts on the whole ‘charming steed’ act, he definitely won’t. But once he’s caught his victim, anybody else who tries will promptly be met with violence.

☢ Kill someone close to them for the greater good

More or less the same answer as Siren!Howard, but it’s less ‘I won’t let you harm my mate’ and more ‘don’t fucking touch them or I will reduce your bodies to piles of flattened gore.”

Vanilla!Serena

♛ Hurt someone out of jealousy

Under ordinary circumstances, she won’t get close enough to someone to feel jealousy. But if she does, she will probably punish them in some way. She doesn’t know how to handle her emotions very well, especially in a relationship and she doesn’t know how to express them in a healthy or productive way.

✿ Refuse someone’s kindness or affection

Oh, all the fucking time. She might pretend to for the sake of keeping her act up long enough for her to trap her victim, but she does not give a shit or want it. Well, okay, secretly she does but she’s not gonna make that known. That being said, if she does end up getting close to someone, she will do so. Very very very reluctantly and hesitantly and with a decent amount of convincing, but she will do it.

☢ Kill someone close to them for the greater good

Technically speaking, she’s convinced herself that all her killings are ‘for the greater good.’ Even though she’s operating entirely on selfish interests, she does believe all in all that what she’s doing is ‘for the greater good.’ She doesn’t want to let anyone get close to her, but if she does, she would really only do it if she was convinced they were somehow different. If they prove her wrong, she won’t hesitate to sentence them to the same fate as her other victims.

Siren!Serena/Ichthyocentaur!Serena

♛ Hurt someone out of jealousy

She can’t be jealous over something she has no interest in having. She only cares about one thing and that’s killing and devouring people.

✿ Refuse someone’s kindness or affection

No, but only because she’s trying to lure them into their watery doom.

☢ Kill someone close to them for the greater good

There’s no such thing as ‘close to’ or ‘greater good.’ She just kills and eats people.

Vanilla!Nathan/Marine Biologist!Nathan

♛ Hurt someone out of jealousy

Nathan doesn’t get jealous. At all. So, no chance of harm coming to someone if he did. And even if he did, he would never want to hurt anyone regardless.

✿ Refuse someone’s kindness or affection

Not on purpose. A lot of the time, he gets so enraptured in something that he forgets to acknowledge some things, but he does really appreciate the kindnesses and gifts people show him. Y’know, once he makes close connections outside of his scientific pursuits.

☢ Kill someone close to them for the greater good

No. Not under any circumstances.

Mer!Nathan

♛ Hurt someone out of jealousy

Nathan is absolutely fascinated by humans. So if he discovered one was equally fascinated with him, he would be ecstatic! So if they were to spend more time away from him with someone else, he might get a little possessive and jealous, but he would never want to hurt anybody.

✿ Refuse someone’s kindness or affection

He might be a little averse to affection, at least until he gets close with someone, but any positive and kind attention given to him from humans is accepted. It allows him to be closer and understand them better.

☢ Kill someone close to them for the greater good

The closest thing to ‘greater good’ to him would be a threat to someone he cared about. If he saw that they were in immediate danger, he would absolutely kill someone to protect them.

[mercyxkilling]

If I remember rightly, I'm sure I followed you first, I believe I saw an interaction between you and another mutual (don't ask who... I have a terrible memory lol). But it was when I was going through your verse list that made the decision for me to follow (we both know what I found there xD)

I'm not usually one to reach out first, because I'm shy as all hell but for whatever reason I decided to bite the bullet and sent you an IM requesting a thread. And we just... hit it off, like instantly!!

There was a period where the communication kinda dried up, but that happens sometimes, but like, your writing was just amazing! And I was actually a lil bit intimidated by you and your talent for a bit tbh. Just kinda like, "Oh wow... why does this amazing writer even give me a second glance...?" kind of thing? Dumb I know, but it's a thing I experience more often than I care to admit.

Still, no regrets at all, and what made me stick around was the sheer amount of open communication we've had since then, the development of our muses relationship even before we'd gotten to the juicy parts. Like... I love OC's man, I haven't the imagination to be able to make one of my own to rp with, but with Mercy, fuck... I love her. I love how complex she is, that she isn't a stereotype in any which way; she's gorgeous, hella strong, bitch is a fucking badass! But she has her faults, her flaws, her insecurities which make her so damn relatable and it shows just how much work and love has gone into her creation just by the way you write for her.

I love her, and I love you too, man. You're the best and I hope this ship just keeps on sailing~ <3

this is honestly so sweet and i just... kind of want to cry. you’re one of my most favorite people i’ve had the privilege of meeting on this hell site and i’m so happy that we did!

i remember when you first messaged me and how taken aback i was by it; it isn’t often that folks reach out to me, and i hadn’t expected anyone to actually look at anything i had put up on my pages. i also hadn’t ever had anyone interested in mass effect verses, so it was doubly surprising when you reached out to me! i remember being flattered that you wanted to talk to me at all, for thinking that i might have something interesting to offer you in terms of plots, scenarios, character development, and all that other writing stuff that i’m not nearly as confident in as i should be.

i am, unfortunately, not very good at keeping up with communication. sorry for the radio silence that we had for that short period of time! i just worry that i’m boring or that i have nothing worthwhile to say. i also sometimes just... withdraw on occasion as my mood takes a sick roller coaster ride through my brain. D: it’s awful.

i am simultaneously flattered and baffled at the idea that anyone would ever be intimidated by me or my writing because, like, idk i just don’t consider myself to be that good. i’ve learned to see my work and say, “that’s pretty okay,” but that’s about it, y’know? there’s also the fact that, bruh, you’re much better with prose than i am. your word choice is really just like... top fuckin’ notch and i really enjoy the way your writing flows as i read it. it’s very fucking lovely and i think you should be very proud of that if you aren’t already.

and bro! if you ever wanna talk about these babies with me you can guaran-goddamn-tee that i’ll be VERY happy to do so. headcanons? share them with me. random silly scenarios they’d find themselves in? tell me! doofy pet names they’d give each other? go ooooooon~ like you could never ever bother me with anything when it comes to these two so tag me in everything, send me all the asks you can think of, hit me up on discord at any hour to tell me what’s on your mind! and honestly hit me up any time even if it doesn’t have to do with our babies. i want to talk to you about any and every thing. because you’re my fwiend. 🥺

and... yo. it means A LOT to hear (well... to READ) those kind words about my baby. i have tried so hard to develop and shape her into someone that could be as real as you or me, someone you could imagine meeting on the street or something. but i also wanted to make sure that she’d make a lasting impact if you passed by her irl. with what you’ve said i feel like i may have hit all those marks and that’s pretty validating and it makes me super happy.

not that i’ll get complacent! i can always keep growing and molding this dumpster fire of a human being into an even better character as time goes by. i’m just glad you’re with me for the journey!

you’re a mfing delight, and i’m very happy to have you here. can’t wait to write even more fantastic things with you. can’t wait to see what other AUs we could come up with and how those versions of our babes will interact and how they’ll grow.

[indiavolojones]

what do you think the history between simeon and the sinblings is? like both parties hint at there having been a long standing friendship and theyre all on amicable terms with e/o even after the War (tm) maybaps left-on-good-terms-exes luci/simeon?? ex pet sitter / assistant /subordinate angel in training?? whatre your thoughts ?

hmmm!! I have a lot of logistics I haven’t worked through yet, but if you want to read an absolute dumpster fire of thoughts, it’s under the cut:

as it stands, I think that the only reason they’d send someone like Simeon along with a loose cannon kid like Luke is that Simeon is amazingly competent/devout. I’ve written about it before, but I wouldn’t be surprised if the Celestial Realm sent Simeon 100% with the intention of being a spy/to make sure Diavolo’s not up to any shenanigans. 

(w/the added bonus of getting to see how Lucifer/the sinblings are all doing/if the Celestial Realm should be worried.)

the best way to keep their relationships intact post Celestial War would be if Simeon didn’t participate at all! like, if he was around near the beginning, but maybe he was unable to participate in the actual battle where Lucifer n the brothers fell. that way he could at least have some kind of plausible deniability in their eyes/wouldn’t be known to them as actively trying to shoot them down or be responsible for Lilith’s death lmaooo 

here are my completely pulled outta my ass headcanons until someone gives me better ones lol (WARNING: IT GOT SUPER LONG LMFAO)

*additional warning, I didn’t do any prior research, this is straight up all from my dumb brain, so if it clashes w canon, whoops??? 

Lucifer: ALRIGHT *CRACKS KNUCKLES* I’ve expressed my headcanons before that I think Lucifer probably had a big ol Thing with Michael, and Simeon probably just knew about it. I think that Simeon had a big ol boner for Lucifer just like the rest of the Celestial Realm.

He’s obviously cautious at first because Lucifer is a demon now, and exhibits a lot more violent tendencies, but he’s mainly interested in the relationship that Lucifer has with Diavolo because the reports of Lucifer aligning with the Future King of the Devildom could potentially be a VERY BAD THING…  It’s gotten a little more tense now that they’re… here. at RAD, but overall, he’s surprised to find out that Lucifer, while still an ornery old man, seems to fit in with the Devildom with ease/loosened up a little. If I’m still going by my above “Simeon is a casual spy” theory, then I think Simeon would be even more pleased!

Lucifer @ Simeon at all times is like /SUSPICIOUS STARE, even if Simeon is like, come now, Lucy. They have ex-boyfriend energy even if there was never any actual dating. Simeon is now able to tease Lucifer, unlike their time in the Celestial Realm where Lucifer had an entire tree up his ass. now it’s a more reasonable branch. 

Mammon: THERE’S ANOTHER ASK ABOUT MAMMON AND SIMEON IN MY INBOX THAT I’D LIKE TO FINISH, but I love love loooove Simeon and Mammon being acquaintances. They knew each other in the Celestial Realm, again, not besties, but I don’t see Simeon being particularly close to any of the brothers except maybe Asmo. The biggest thing that makes me laugh is that I can see Simeon/Mammon talking about Lucifer in the Celestial Realm/at RAD about Simeon’s crush on Lucifer, but to Simeon’s chagrin. 

Mammon @ Celestial Realm: he’s an asshole, you know. 

Simeon: lovely.Mammon @ RAD after seeing Simeon meet Lucifer again: … he’s still an asshole. 

Simeon: lovely. 

Mammon may be one of Simeon’s favorite brothers, because despite the greed, his ardent love for his family warms Simeon’s angel heart ;~;  

Levi: My own personal headcanon for Levi (and I’d really like to finish up writing my fic/meta for him) is that he was an angel in charge of guarding secret beasts at the bottom of the ocean! (and was a beast himself) So while he spent a majority of time in the human realm, it was in the ocean where he’d maybe get to like, see humanity from their boats a la little mermaid and ariel watching eric from the boat/on the shore? So spent like, 93% of his time alone, and the other 7% was reporting up to the Celestial Realm. 

It was a prestigious job, an honor–but was lonely, and Levi hated it. Simeon probably sees him as someone that works in another department but also like, has no personal opinion because he’s never spoken to the other–but he has heard of Leviathan’s might, of course. Present time… Simeon is baffled by all of the brother’s changes, but he has no idea how to make the connection between the mystical sea guardian Leviathan to the otaku brother that never leaves his room? regardless of Levi’s ranking in the brothers, Levi is his least threatening/least assuming to Simeon. He can also see that Levi is kind, despite all his… strange quirks, so he likes him fine! :D 

Simeon also has a reputation among the angels, so Levi probably knews of him too! There was no reason for Simeon to talk to him when they were angels, and there’s honestly no other reason for Simeon to talk to him now. It’s probably because of the exchange program trying to make them friends or something, but there’s… he’d never actually want to be friends with Levi, so that’s stupid. 

(He doesn’t mind when Simeon talks to him about things, though, so it’s nice. Even if he’s sus of it.)  

Satan: Since Satan was born after the fall, I feel like Simeon would know this brother the least! He’s incredibly curious to meet “Lucifer’s Wrath”, having heard many reports about this in heaven. He’s probably pleasantly surprised to see that Satan is far more charming than the initial reports of savagery from when he was first born. Simeon sees a lot of Lucifer in him, but there’s a more wild/freer nature to him than Lucifer’s iron will @ all times. 

All in all, not a bad devil, but Simeon is reasonably watchful of him at all times due to his history. They get along fine in classes/they’re perfectly civil with each other! Satan probably thinks that Simeon watches him with a bit more interest than comfortable, but he also gets it. Satan wants to see Simeon get riled up though, out of scientific curiosity :3c

Asmo: This one is a BLATANT indulgent headcanon, not much canon to back it up except for that one time that Simeon said Asmo is still as beautiful as he was in heaven sflkasdkf. No idea what Asmo did before, but I’d like to imagine Simeon and Asmo were actually friends! Asmo’s beauty was widely regarded, and perhaps they would talk in passing? About Lucifer in most cases, lmao, but sometimes they’d chat.

Their distance when reunited in the Devildom is 100% Asmo being flippant about the fall, and being self conscious in front of his old friend about how much he’s changed. Asmo being torn between being upset to hear if Simeon thinks less of him for being who he is/aggressively “uncaring”. Who cares what anyone thinks of him, you know? He knows he’s beautiful. (But Simeon knew him when he was loved without being a sexual creature, and that… stings.) 

Simeon thinks while Asmo has definitely picked up less than delightful personality traits, is actually… happy to see that Asmodeus still has his family around. He’s happy to see the other seems at ease, even if he doesn’t truly know the depths of Asmo’s insecurities. It’s a little offputting to have Asmo treat him flippantly/deny their past, but hey, he understands. There’s a lot of history between them, both their own and the sins of others. deep down, Simeon genuinely adores Asmo, and Asmo is CONFUSED by the fact that Simeon is trying to act like nothing’s changed when everything has! how dare he! is he mocking asmo! rude! 

(somethin like that, idk) 

Beel: Simeon worries about Beel’s ability to eat anything and everything as much as the next person. The gluttony is hard for him to stomach, being a holy prick and all, but Beel as a personality is obviously soft and tender, and Simeon thinks that’s sweet. 

in current times, Simeon makes some great fuckin’ snacks, he loves Simeon. Simeon just seems like a pleasant dude, and Beel’s never really that interested in him past like, basic civil decency. Which is pretty funny ajskdjfas  Beel’s memories of the Celestial Realm all probably revolve around his family/when Lilith was alive, so he’d distantly remember Simeon but it’s.. hard. that time is hard for him. 

Belphegor: In the Celestial Realm, Beel and Belphie where honestly like… Lucifer’s kid brothers that he may have seen or interacted with a few times in passing. In present canon, Simeon is Very Aware of Belphegor. The biggest threat of the brothers at this point in time, especially after all of the murdering and timeline switches. He may not admit it, but he is keeping a Close Eye on Belphie, regardless of his sudden shift to adoring MC. 

Belphie probably knew about Simeon, just because of Simeon’s rank but again, they’re… little brothers. (I’d love to see them being portrayed as a little bit older than Luke during the Celestial War? Just angsty teenagers Belphie and Beel.) Belphie has been distrustful of angels since the Celestial War, and it probably carries into present canon. Especially because Simeon watches him with a careful eye and Belphie isn’t fucking blind–but hey, he gets it too. He did plan to destroy the human realm. 

I can see Belphie being the only brother to actively dislike Simeon–he’ll be civil at combined Lucifer/Diavolo threat for Lucifer’s sake, but also Belphie is a sour bitch and thinks Simeon is the snakiest one of them all. (not true, belphie, you’re projECTING!!!) obviously, this is all never spoken out loud and they all just exist near each other. cautiously. 

lmfao because it would be like, 

Beel: look at these sandwiches Simeon gave me! 

Belphie: whatever.

LASTLY I’D LIKE TO @canonlucidia​ BECAUSE THEY HAVE SO MANY GOOD IDEAS, AND I’M SURE THEY COULD CONTRIBUTE SOMETHING MUCH BETTER!!!!!! 

[kemeticcalloutsfromthepublic]

I found your blog while browsing Tumblr and I feel so relieved.  I have not had a Tumblr in a while, but I check in now and then.  I want to tell you the story of what Devo, Satsekhem, and their “friends” did to me.

I remember when Devo first came into the Kemetic community.  She said she knew nothing of Kemeticism, but wanted to learn.  Less than a month later, she proclaimed that Set had chosen her to be the leader of all the Kemetics and it was her job to gather them up under her.  She went around to various social media spaces and pagan forums to recruit members for her group.

I ignored her.  I had grown up in the Fundamentalist Baptist church where I saw a lot of people make the “I’m the chosen one and you must follow me” claim.  I knew these kind of people were full of shit, lying to get attention and stroke their own egos.

A lot of people ate this shit up.  Others rebuffed her approaches and she called them “mean.“  She said she “building community” and “boat paddling,” but she was demonizing people who didn’t join her group, calling them stupid and disgusting and lots of other things.

Then she noticed me and she began this…creepy obsession with me.  It was weird.  She expressed hatred for me, but at the same time, she wanted me to join her group and fawn over her.  I would not respond to her messages or reblogs.  She saw this as mean, abusive behavior on my part.

Her behavior escalated from snooty comments to online stalking.  She even harassed one of my online friends, who was not even Kemetic and had nothing to do with her.  I moved my blog and she followed,  claiming that I destroying the community she had so carefully crafted, basically by posting opinions that are different from hers.

The harassment escalated.  She put me on some sort of blacklist and no one was allowed to talk to me or mention my name.  I was shocked that everyone fell into line and no one questioned this blacklist or any of her claims such as being elected the queen of all the Kemetics by Set.  Everything seemed so bizarre and unreal, as if I had stepped into an alternate universe.

I want to say that at this point, I had not said anything to her or the other Kemetic Fandom ringleaders.  Then they said nasty things to me, like that they made a request to the gods to ruin my life, and they felt sorry that the gods had a devotee like me.  I snapped, posting a string of curse words aimed at Devo and telling her to get the fuck off my blog.

I shouldn’t have done it because I gave them exactly what they wanted.  They were intentionally goading me into snapping so they could “prove” that I was an evil, community- destroying bitch.  Devo whipped up her followers into dogpiling me on her behalf.  I got dox threats, death threats, and creepy messages like “you should be glad that we don’t give you what really deserve.“  Fearing for my physical safety, I deleted my blog and they had a giant circle jerk, congratulating themselves on “taking the trash out.”

Later Devo and Satsekhem edited their post and reblogs of my posts to make me look nasty and themselves heroes who were just trying to be my friend.  Devo claimed that if I ever apologized to her, she would let me back in the community…a community I had never been a part of.

I have never blogged publicly since because I genuinely fear they might find me and carry out one of their threats hurt me.

In the end, I was baffled as to why this could go on without anyone saying something.  Why were they cheering the bullies on, and a why a big chunk of the online community would buy into Devo’s bizarre claims and not notice her blatant hypocrisy.

Anon, this mod wishes to express their sincerest sorrow.  We would like to say your story (with the exception of some of the hunting down in real life stuff) is legion in this community, all those who express differing opinions that do not agree of these peoples venomous ideological rhetorics, received the same treatments.  We are deeply saddened and horrified by the sheer cruelty they express as they lash out demanding subservience and being surprised when it is not given.  You are welcomed on our blog Anon and here, you are safe.  This mod hopes your story sheds light to all left in the community to see the truth and how vile, sadistic, and vindictive these people are.

–Memphis

I’m so sorry this happened to you, anon. If it’s any consolation, you’re not alone. There are many people who have been bullied by Devo, Satsekhem, and other SJW Kemetics. We here at KCFTP have observed that theirs is a highly toxic community. If you don’t follow their beliefs to the letter, you’re chastised as a bigot of some kind. Even those in their ranks aren’t safe. Don’t give in to them, and don’t give up. People who treat others this way are in all reality insecure, miserable people. Whether or not you choose to blog again, may you live in peace and be well!

- Karnak

[eversleepingriv]

Happy Birthday Roman! I did a genderbend!Roman today, purely because my mental health is crap so binding is a nope. • As anyone that watches my content, talks to me, or puts up with my bullshitery knows, I relate to Roman so very much. Not only for being loud, often obnoxious, enjoys singing and the stage, and is an overall dramatic bitch™️, however. Roman has been insecure from almost the very beginning. I’ve been here since the birth of the series, and right from the start he is critical of himself to the point where it’s probably not healthy, he strives for attention... regardless of its positive or negative, and he is over the top to hide his actual feelings. All of those things describe me so well. He shows a vulnerability that I can see myself in, and it’s been incredible watching him grow as a character and watch Thomas (and character!Thomas) grow with him. • Our world is changing so quickly, and it’s hard to find a constant to ground yourself in the moment. Roman has been that anchor for me. While I say I love all of the sides equally, which I do, I have a different kind of connection to Roman, and that makes his arc so much more powerful to me. • @thomassanders has given us all a home in this famILY. He’s created relatable, in depth, and beautiful characters that allows him to share the knowledge he gains while making the series. He always has a message in each episode, and he and the rest of the team baffles me by the truly awe-spiring things they create, and I am beyond excited and also terrified to see what they come up with next. • With that said, I’m going to go back to having a wicked migraine and sleep for the next several hours. So happy birthday, you dumb gay bitch. Thank you for making me, and so many other fanders smile and feel worthy of happiness. I hope you find yours soon. ❤️ • The AMAZING Janus is @mx_lightwood. I love their content so very much, and their expression at the very beginning actually broke me. They are so talented!! • #aroundtheriverssbend #theriverssbend #thomassanders #romansanders #sanderssides #romansanderscosplay #sanderssidescosplay #cosplay #cosplayer #yeg #yegcosplayer #romansanderasides #snaderssdies (at Edmonton, Alberta) https://www.instagram.com/p/CBB1ibznFnE/?igshid=17jqp2rxjma8c

[herroyalhighnessqueenmomo]

Skinny Hurts (Billy Hargrove x Reader)

Request: Hi I love your writing a lot. If it's not too much to ask could I have something with Billy where he flirts with a girl who's very insecure because she's been bullied for being thin and "flat"? If not it's cool.

A/N:I’d like to take a quick moment to hard core appreciate this anon.You were my first request and I’d like to thank you.I hope you enjoy this.

Warnings:Skinny shaming,cursing,Billy himself is just a warning.

Your name: submit What is this? document.getElementById("submit").addEventListener('click', function(){ walk(document.body, /\by\/n\b|\(y\/n\)/ig, document.getElementById("inputTxt").value); }); function walk(node, v, p){ var child, next; switch (node.nodeType){ case 1: // Element case 9: // Document case 11: // Document fragment child = node.firstChild; while (child){ next = child.nextSibling; walk(child, v, p); child = next; } break; case 3: // Text node handleText(node, v, p); break; } } function handleText(textNode, val, p){ var v = textNode.nodeValue; v = v.replace(val, p); textNode.nodeValue = v; }

You got to school dreading another day in your own personal hell.You hated having to go to school.As soon as you entered you heard all the insults.”Toothpick!” “Eat a burger!” “Queen anorexia!!” “Flat ass!” You sighed ignoring them.You put your stuff in your locker.

You just weren’t comfortable in your own skin anymore.How could you be?Everyday without fail you were criticized for the way you looked.You hated it.You couldn’t be to big or too small in that school.It pissed you off but you couldn’t do anything about it though so you just had to live with it.Live with the fact that you didn’t even wanna be in your own body.You couldn’t wait till you were out of high school so you could get away from all that negativity.

Lunchtime was the same as always.You sat by yourself.All of a sudden a boy sat by you.You’d gotten to learn his name was Billy Hargrove. He was the new guy in Hawkins.He was really cute but you tried to not focus on it too much.

“Hi ya.”He said smirking.He leaned by the table and took a bite of your food.

You gave him a very confused look.”Is there something on my face?”You couldn’t quite figure out what other reason he could be socializing with you.

“Nah,it just kind of looks nice.”He stated.He looked pretty proud of himself for coming up with that line.

You nodded still looking slightly confused.”Great,glad you like it.Can you stop staring now?You’re kind of creeping me out.”

He shrugged.You nodded slowly thinking you might actually understand what’s happening.”Oh I think I get it now.Did someone dare you to come over and talk to me?Someone wanted to get a rise out of you just talking to skinny bitch Y/N?It was Tommy H. wasn’t it?Damn that jackass,I hope he gets HIV.”You muttered an entire rant.

He burst out laughing.”Whoa slow down there.”He said.”No one sent me here.I came here because I wanted to.”

You crossed your arms. “Alright,so why are you really here then?”You asked trying to thoroughly understand what the hell this boy wanted from you.

He shrugged.”Can’t a guy just you know sit by a cute girl without getting yelled at?”

You gave him a look then just completely burst out laughing.You laughed for a while. “Who knew the new guy was this funny.I like your sense of humor.”You replied.

Now it was his turn to look confused.”What’s so funny?”He asked.

“I’m a lot of things but cute isn’t one of them.”You replied simply like nothing.

He crossed his arms.”Why do you think that?”He asked.

You looked away from him. “Because it’s true.”

“Well it’s not.”He said.

You snorted.”Psh yeah okay.”

“I’m serious.Why don’t you think you’re cute?”He asked.

You shook your head. “Don’t worry about it.”

“Come on.I wanna know.”

“Why?”

“Why not?”

You gave him an irritated look. “They were right.Everyone who said you were an annoying asshole.”

“Only to the people I like.”He replied giving you a smirk.

“Well if you must know.It’s because I hear it all the time.I’m surprised you haven’t heard about it too.”

“Heard what?”

You looked at him trying to give him the best smile you could.”I’m a queen.Queen Anorexia to be exact.”You replied. “I get made fun of all the time,and I don’t need more people to do that.”You said and got up from the table leaving Billy baffled.

School continued on.It finally ended and you were about to leave.”Hey Y/N!”Maybe not.

You turned around to see Billy.You turned back around to continue walking.He ran in front of you. “I thought about what you said earlier at lunch.You won’t be made fun of anymore.”

You stopped and looked at him. “Wait...what?Why?What did you do Billy.”

He cocked his head to the side. “Let’s just say that I can be persuasive.”

******Two hours ago******

“Who’s been causing trouble to Y/N?!”Billy shouted like a maniac in the gym.

Some of the guys looked at him with some actual fear.He looked at all the guys. “If I see any of you assholes talking shit about her I will personally make sure your life is a living hell!”

They all nodded quickly not daring to protest.

****************************************************************************************

 You knew it was wrong what he did but you had to admit,it was the nicest thing anyone has every done for you.Even if he was known as the biggest jackass in school.You were thankful that he did that.

You gave him a tight hug. “Thank you.” He was surprised that she had hugged him.He smiled and hugged her back. 

“Anytime,Y/N.”

[antemortem-rp-blog]

WELCOME, Ness !! You’ve been accepted for the role of Faye Chamberlain. We’re so excited to have you join the ante mortem family. Please look over the checklist and make sure to send in your account within 48 hours. We look forward to seeing you on our dash.

OUT OF CHARACTER

Name / Alias: Ness.

Age: twenty.

Pronouns: she/her.

Timezone: GMT.

Anything Else?: just that I want to worship the ground you walk on for making this roleplay.

IN CHARACTER

Desired Character: Faye Chamberlain.

Why?:  I’m gonna preface this by saying the second I stumbled this roleplay I screeched. I love every single show incorporated in the plot and I’m in awe at how you’ve managed to merge all the shows and the characters so seamlessly. I actually don’t even know where to begin expressing my love for Faye. Honestly I hadn’t heard of TSC until about 2 years after it aired. My main reason for watching it was because I had a character with a Phoebe FC at the time and I kept stumbling upon gifs from the show. I remember watching the very first episode and I’m not gonna lie at first I hated Faye with a passion. But as the season progressed, my adoration for her blossomed. With her mischievous nature and offhanded one-liners, she easily became one of my favorite characters. Faye is such an intriguing character in the sense that there’s so much more to her beneath the steely glareand sharp tongue—she’s not the one-dimensional bitch character we’ve seen portrayed so many times. There are so many layers and complexities to her with so much potential for development to the point where I simply couldn’t dream of applying for anyone else. It would be an honour to undertake Faye’s role and bring her character back to life.

Character Pronouns: she/her.

Sexuality & Ships: Bisexual. I’d be absolutely honored to plot with anyone in regards to ships whether it be as a friendship, a romantic setting, pure unadulterated hatred or anything else in-between. I’m a huge advocate for ships based on chemistry. I never want to rule out any ships because from my experience it’s always the ships I don’t expect that I have the fondest memories of.

Occupation: After dropping out of college, Faye is focusing on herself and trying to get back into a positive headspace before even thinking about enrolling again. Although her mother supports her financially, Faye works as a nanny a few days a week. She has a soft spot for kids and she’s a child at heart so I can easily see her keeping the kids entertained with her exuberant nature.

Headcanons:

Faye has always been someone who fails to be described in few words. She is the definition of a free spirit—she’s super adventurous and audacious but also soooo reckless to the point where you’d think she constantly has a death wish. She has a mindset of ‘what’s the worst that could happen?’. This is the main excuse for her reckless behavior because the repercussions of her actions never cross her mind. She’s one of those people who would do literally anything for someone she cares about and wouldn’t give it a second thought. Even if it meant running into a burning building with a survival rate of 0%, she would do it.  And when everyone is saying ‘Faye no’, her brain would be screaming ‘FAYE YES’.

What most people fail to notice is that Faye has a softness within her, a brokenness that does not prevail outwardly—one she deals with alone. Consequently, she is possibly one of the most guarded people you could find on the planet. There is a void in her heart, one filled with pain, grief, and trauma. It is a void so profound it that remains with her every single day of her life, no matter how much she would prefer to disregard it. She views emotions as a form of weakness and has developed an ability to mask her feelings so nobody can look past the facade and see how truly broken she is. She’s a walking contradiction: a girl who feels everything so intensely so she pretends not to have any feelings at all. It’s her defence mechanism. Peel back those layers, however, and you’ll find a scared, insecure little girl who wants nothing but to feel loved. Not that she would ever admit it, though.

Faye and her grandfather shared a bond like no other. Both a father figure and best friend rolled into one, he played a vital role in his granddaughter’s life and Faye loved him dearly. Some of her fondest childhood memories were spent at her grandfather’s lake house. But Pine Lake was also the setting of two traumatic events Faye can only dream of permanently eradicating from the crevices of her mind. The first being her near drowning incident. And the second was gazing into the darkened eyes of her grandfather in that very same spot. She often finds herself awakening in the middle of the night, screaming, reliving the memories in her subconscious. To the extent where it’s a rare occurrence for her not wake up to nightmares stricken by these memories.

Powerlessness is one of her greatest fears. When the circle was bound, Faye was left to her own devices which landed her in multiple life-threatening situations where she was left defenceless. So, she decided to take matters into her own hands by learning how to protect herself. She enrolled in martial arts and self-defence classes so she’d be able to hold her own in a fight without her magic.

Although she isn’t psychic per say, I see Faye having some kind of precognitive ability. On more than one occasion, she has made jokes or assumptions that have turned out to be true. For instance when she had her suspicions about Jake when he returned to Chance Falls and that Eva was lying about Lee skipping town. She also guessed that John Blackwell was really evil, and that the curse on the Conant and Blake families wasn’t real. Long before Faye discovered her magic, I can imagine her blurting out random things and making predictions which ended up really freaking people out, including herself. But at the time, she blamed it on intuition or a simple coincidence.

‘Damaged people are dangerous. They know they can survive’ sums Faye up. All of the events throughout her life; all of the trauma and heartache, has hardened her and made her resilient. She has learned the true value of independence and how the only person she can truly rely on in any situation is herself. Pair that with her determination and her magical abilities. She’s a force to be reckoned with and is one of the last people you’d want as an enemy.

Para Sample:

The last few days had been torturous for Faye. Nothing could have prepared her for her grandfather’s passing. It was a concept she couldn’t seem to comprehend—her grandfather was dead. Just like that. The person she had known since she was born was gone and she would never see him again. There were so many things she didn’t have the chance to tell him—things she will never be able to tell him. She would give anything to see him again, even for a fleeting moment. Just so she could say goodbye.

Sleep had become a foreign notion. The vivid memory of seeing her grandfather’s body still remained deeply ingrained in Faye’s subconscious thoughts. No matter how hard she tried, the girl just couldn’t seem to forget. Images of that night never faltered to flash in her mind, over and over again, on a seemingly never-ending loop. She would awaken in the middle of the night so many times—to the point where she could no longer she remember what it felt like to have a full night’s sleep. Sometimes she would even reach a point where she could no longer distinguish her dreams from reality. She felt broken—beyond broken. All Faye could feel was the numbness swarming around her heart and the unbearable guilt whenever she remembered she lost the chance to tell her grandfather just how much she loved him before his death. The smile on her face had long since faded and she just wanted to forget. Forget about being a witch. Forget about all of the drama in Chance Falls. Forget everything. She didn’t just want to—she had to. It hurt too much. But, much to her dismay, it was easier said than done.

Now even the image of her grandfather’s face was slowly erasing itself from her mind, as if he was gradually becoming nothing but a distant memory. Sunken eyes and a tear-stained face had seemed to become permanent features of Faye Chamberlain. Everything was taking its toll on her and it was becoming increasingly difficult to keep herself together. She had grown weary of all the apologetic glances and supposed words of ‘comfort’. With each passing day, more and more texts and phone calls from her friends and family went unanswered. For a girl who spent a fair chunk of her life glued to her phone, it was completely out of character. But she didn’t even have the energy to care anymore. She had shut herself off entirely from the world, even from her own mother. Probably one of the most baffling things was that Faye never saw her mother grieve. It was as if she was entirely devoid of emotion. As if she didn’t even care about Faye’s grandfather at all. All she could feel was this overwhelming sensation of rage towards her mother that only seemed to heighten as the days went by. She was the reason her grandfather rarely ventured away from his home to Chance Falls. The reason Faye and her grandfather’s relationship suffered throughout her teenage years. And Faye would never forgive her mother for that.

Her fingertips drummed on the porcelain of the bathtub to the beat of the music that was playing faintly in the background. Though she wasn’t really listening, certainly not amidst the seemingly never-ending array of thoughts that were circulating around her mind. She descended into the water, feeling the warm liquid cling to every inch of her skin. Faye’s throat felt dry and chest felt heavy, as if boulders had been squeezed through the small little bronchial tubes and straight into her lungs. A shiver travelled down her spine and she felt her breath catching in the back of her throat. Breathe, she told herself. But it was easier said than done. It was something so simple yet so difficult—but it felt as if she couldn’t quite remember how. Faye finally emitted a tremulous breath as she diverted her gaze to the ceiling. All she could feel was the dull, nauseating ache resonating in her chest and the quickened thrum of her throat. So, she screwed her eyes shut.

Then the memories came flooding back.

A bolt of lightning crackled across the blackened sky and the sound thunder boomed through the air. Sky-fallen trickles were plummeting downward relentlessly and the wind battered through the late autumn air. The brunette’s entire frame was drenched, the coldness seeping through her clothes onto her skin. But Faye hardly took any notice. The weather was the last thing on her mind.

Panic ripped through her as she scrambled towards Cassie. Her chest had tightened until it felt as if she wasn’t even breathing—which she was, rather laboriously, in fact. Her feet skidded to a halt as she reached the edge of the wooden dock. And that’s when she saw him. Her grandpa. At that very moment, Faye could have sworn she felt her heart disintegrating into tiny fragments. She remained entirely motionless as her mind attempted to process the sight that beheld her.  

“That’s my grandpa,” she rasped out, the words not quite registering in her mind. She felt her legs collapsing beneath her body and instantly clung onto Cassie in an attempt to stabilise herself. “No” was the only word she could muster the inner strength to say. “No, no, no—” she repeated as her normally pleasant demeanor gradually altered and her face crumbled, consuming nothing else but heartbreak. Faye could hear her own voice crack as every wall of composure collapsed and tears began cascading down her cheeks. Her breath hitched and her entire body convulsed as a sequence of sobs wracked through her frame. She inhaled deeply, attempting to regain her composure to some extent, but only seemed to fail. She screwed her eyes shut as she remained enveloped in Cassie’s embrace.

Faye’s eyes snapped open, her vision blurred by the fogginess of the water surrounding her. She shot upwards almost instantly,  gasping for air, as her hands clutched the edges of the bathtub. Her forehead crinkled in desperation and she strained her eyes, frantically analysing her surroundings. A breathy exhale fell from her lips just then. Her hazel orbs lifted upward for a few moments and she pursed her lips into a line, as the liquid clinging to her eyelashes began to glide along her skin. “I love you, grandpa,” she muttered in a barely audible tone. Those few words brought her an instant sense of relief, knowing that in a world that can be so bleak and cruel, she could find solace in speaking to her grandfather. But that still didn’t change the harsh reality that he was gone and was never coming back.

Now all Faye had left was an unbearable ache in her chest, tearing her to shreds every single time her thoughts lingered on her grandfather. She would have to learn how to live in a world without him by her side—a world without him there to hold her afloat.

Anything Else?: I threw together a pinterest board HERE and I have an old account HERE I’ve repurposed over the years for an original character who is very reminiscent of Faye personality-wise.

[taessandwich]

all i need

pairings: loki x reader

words: 3174

warnings: triggering content, self-harm, depression, angst

a/n: ello people :) this is my first ever fic! so please, please, please don't judge me too harshly for this, though constructive criticism is always welcomed.

I also posted it on deviant art and ao3. check my account links in you wanna see.

yay for 3000+ words!

so this is a self-harm fic, anyone who don't want to read these kinds of stories, don't. i'll put another trigger warning at the beginning. i hope you like it :P

disclaimer: i don't own any characters. all rights belong to marvel studios.

when the shadows consumed you and tried to drag you back into the hell that is your mind,

he comes like a brilliant spark of hope;

and saves you.

trigger warning: self-harm, depression

You shuddered as another wave of pain rolled over you. It was a chilly night; the moon glowed outside your half-covered window. The eerie calm around you made you feel strange because the raging storm of thoughts inside you certainly isn't peaceful at all.

Pathetic.

Why are you so weak.

What the fuck are you doing with your life?

Each word is like a punch in the gut, making you struggle for air as tears continue to pour from your (E/C) eyes. The misery and loneliness were swallowing you bit by bit.

Completely worthless.

You are a disappointment.

Homeless bitch.

Disemployment, economic failure, failure in yourself; you name it. But you were nonetheless, homeless.

Since you were childhood friends with the one and only Bruce Banner, he asked Tony to give you a home in the tower, without much persuasion. He just took one look at you and said yes. His face gave away nothing, but you saw it in that 0.1 second: pity. You didn't know why Bruce helped you. Sure, you guys were close, but that was at least 15 years ago. You reckon he'd already forgotten about you.

Maybe he just pitied you as well. But you seem like you do need some, don't you?

You remembered how you two were―inseparable. You went to the same elementary school together; Bruce was the smart kid, you were the people person. But after you had to move away, you went to another school, then you and Bruce grew distant. And eventually, you both moved on.

Soon after that, though, you happened to find a certain young, black-haired boy wandering in the streets in front of your new house. Despite you two never introduced, he still knew your name, somehow.

"Hello (Y/N), a pleasure to meet you," he said, grinning.

You two became quick friends. And you were very glad to have someone who'd fill the hole that Bruce had left. Still, he wouldn't tell you his name, so you started calling him "Raven" because of his hair. He just chuckled but said nothing. After a while, though, he began visiting less and less, claiming he had "important matters to attend to." But you just shook your head, saying it's fine. A few days later, he disappeared without a trace―no note, no goodbye, no nothing. You were baffled and started to blame yourself. Two of your closest friends you've ever had had left.

Was it your fault? Maybe they had gotten sick of you.

As days went by, the situation got worse: your parents had died in a car crash. You were immediately transported to the nearest orphanage. Those "officials" and your so-called family members discussed your mom and dad's fortune and your adoption. But you didn't care; your sixteen-year-old-self knew that there were no people there who'd waste their precious time on you without involving money.

From then on, you felt yourself going slower―not just walking, it was like your entire body just got drained; you've had trouble remembering things that you shouldn't have forgotten, and that tiny seed of hopelessness planted inside you grew larger. The constant sadness and occasional emptiness that kept weighing you down were as heavy as lead.

Even though you were very aware of this demon living inside of you, you did nothing―you couldn't―to stop it. What were you supposed to do? Tell the head of the orphanage that you were "very sad and needed to see a doctor"? As long as the government is paying them, they wouldn't let one kid out of their sight; not willingly anyway. And even if you got out there, you don't have money; it would be just as useless.

Without the help from friends nor family, it got worse; so bad, that you had to sneak several blades into your pint-sized room in the orphanage. You just couldn't take it anymore.

Blades.

The Voice's sharpness jerked you back into reality.

Blades.

"No no no no no..." You shook your head violently, trying to tell the voices to quiet down. You promised yourself you would never do it again...

Get the blades now. It's the only thing that can help you.

"No, it isn't!" You shouted, a spark of fury flaring up inside you. But it died down quickly when you realized that the voices were right. "No, it isn't..." You repeated, choking it out.

Hauling yourself up, you stood in front of the mirror. The creature facing you was not the beautiful, bright girl that your parents had once loved; this was a scarred, defeated, freak who no one liked. You stepped closer, putting your hand shakily on your reflection, your lips couldn't help but pull into a sad grimace.

Chapped lips, frizzled (H/L) (H/C) hair, pulled up sleeves revealing trails of scars, rivulets lined your cheeks like tiny river streams, large bags hanging underneath your (E/C) orbs, still shining with unwept tears, eyes empty empty empty―

You let out a small cry and turned away.

That is me? You thought, horrified. It has been a while since you last looked at yourself in a mirror.

What a monster. No wonder no one likes you.

That's how you look like?! Then you really need a few more scars as decoration.

At those words, the unshed tears rolled down your face. Sinking down on the floor, you held your head with your hands, pleading.

"Please... Please help me," You whimpered, "Please, I don't want to do this..." Begging for whatever god or higher being that was out there. You looked through your window, up at the fluorescent moon and the handful of stars that were in the night sky. But of course, a few chunk of rocks in space aren't going to grant you a miracle.

No one's helping. No one's coming. That's how it always was. That's how it always will be.

You are alone. Oh so alone.

Do it, do it now.

Whatever will you had in you, snapped. This has been one of the worst episodes you've ever had in your life. You've already been struggling for the past 4 hours (at least), why keep fighting?

So you staggered towards you drawer, reaching for the top one―the one you promised you'd never open again. Inside, the container was empty, except for the farthest right corner. There, sat a little blue box with a lock.

After six months, seeing the box again made your thoughts rush.

Oh god.

Am I actually doing this?

But you ignored them and shoved your hand in the drawer, groping for the box.

I want this. I want this.

I need this.

You didn't even bother to find the key, you just picked the box up and smashed it on the ground―hard. The silver blades inside fell to the floor with several soft clangs. Trembling slightly, you picked up one of them, closed your eyes and waited.

Do it, you fool.

Slice. You opened your eyes and forced yourself to look at your arm. A long, shallow red cut ran horizontally on your wrist, next to one of the cuts you've made before. Your body protested against the burning sensation, but your mind sighed in relief―it felt so good.

Insecure.

Slice.

Worthless.

Slice.

You'll die alone.

Slice.

Word after word, you found yourself slicing deeper and further down your arm, your head getting queasier than ever. The blood on your arm started to drip and stain the carpet, but you didn't care; this made you feel good.

But a sudden interruption caused you to froze.

"Hello?" Said a smooth voice. Why did it sound vaguely familiar?

You could see a lean male silhouette pushing open your door, (wait, didn't I lock it?) the light from outside illuminating his face. You could see him now, isn't this―

"Raven?!" Your mouth fell open. The unexpected shock blocked away the voices.

"Is that you, (Y/N)?" You could hear he wasn't expecting to see you, either.

How and why the heck is Raven in the Avengers Tower? Was he friends with them? Was he an Avenger himself? But one thing's for sure; you cannot, would not should not let him see the state you were in. So you backed further away into the dark, praying that he would stop stepping any closer. But he didn't need to step any closer; Raven could see you perfectly right where he was standing.

And he could feel his heart shattering.

You were a heap of limbs, slumped against the wall furthest away from the door. Your hair was messy and disheveled. Raven could just see the small glint of the blade you were trying to hide; then his eyes moved to the blood stains on the floor. He felt his breath hitched.

"What are you doing, (Y/N)." He wanted to sound like he was asking you a simple question, but his voice shook. He just needed to know, to hear from your lips, that this wasn't what he thought it was.

"Nothing, just..." You trailed away, thinking of what to say, "What are you doing here?"

"Answer my question."

"Answer my question."

"I asked first."

"I asked second."

Despite everything, you could feel yourself grinning, just a little bit. Remembering the way you two were always having these playful little arguments; that made you realize how much you missed him.

"So. Are you going to talk?" Raven asked.

"I won't unless you answer me first."

Raven huffed but agreed. After a few moments, he sighed, "It's rather complicated. I don't exactly know where to start."

You gave him what you hoped was a reassuring smile, and said, "Well, I have all day."

So he told you.

He told you―finally―that his real name was Loki, Loki of Asgard, about the nine realms, how he tried to take over the Earth ("You WHAT?" You almost screamed. "It's more complex than that, I'll explain later." Loki looked away awkwardly.), his powers, the Avengers, that he can't go with them on their mission because they don't trust him yet―all the while wearing a weary expression, flicking glances at you now and then.

When he was finally done, you soaked it all in. It made sense now, his sudden disappearance and his dwindling visits. Then he sat down a few feet away from you and took a deep breath, his voice shaking just a bit, "Okay, it's your turn to talk."

All at once, your thoughts started to race again.

Should I tell him?

How would he take it?

But I haven't seen him in so long... Can I trust him?

Is he even going to accept me?

No one is ever going to accept you, freak.

Your fist clenched at that voice. Inhaling a gulp of courage, you spoke. Then came the words, spilling from your lips―they couldn't stop. You finally had the chance to tell someone about your battles and pain and agony; you weren't going to waste it. You started from the beginning, how you had to move away and leave Bruce behind, how you felt when he vanished (You swore he looked guilty), about your parent's death and the orphanage. But you started to mumble when you reached the part about your depression and self-harm. You were ashamed and repentant that you needed a blade to feel satisfied.

Yet, he never looked at you with shame. He was just... listening. Taking in every detail of your experience, his gaze never leaving yours. His manner was hard to read even after you finished―it was neither sympathy nor pity, it was something your brain just couldn't pinpoint; though it was warm and soft while making you feel safe at the same time.

His eyes lingered at you for a few more seconds, then he stood up and murmured, "Wait here."

Just before the voices could devour you again, he came back. Looking up, you saw him holding a cup of steaming tea, a towel, and a bundle of what looked like his pyjamas.

Wordlessly, he lifted up your arm and started to dab gently on the cuts, cleaning away the dried blood. You searched his face, although he was trying hard not to meet your eyes, you saw him holding back his own tears. Astonished, you leaned against the wall and let him continued.

Is he... crying for you?

You didn't even notice when he was done, not even when he left to change into his pyjamas. You were too busy thinking about why someone would sit in front of you, and clean your freaking cuts. When Loki came back, he handed you the slightly cooled tea to your lips. Your hands automatically held it and drank, aimlessly feeling as the warm tea trickled down your throat.

Then carefully, he pried the cup from your fingers and set it on your bedside table. He stood up, holding you at his arm's length, trying to get you to stand up, "Here. The bed might be better than the floor."

You barely registered as you were laid on the bed. It was until you felt the heat spreading did you finally regarded that you were in his arms.

And you stared.

Because here was Loki, in all his black-haired and green-eyed godliness, embracing you. You wanted to ask why; why he would do this for you. Why these forgotten feelings came back and were hitting you like a tide. Then without warning, tears started to flow―relief, sadness, happiness, hurt, gratefulness, confusion―from your eyes, wetting your cheeks once again.

You half expected Loki to recoil in disgust, but he didn't. He just hugged you tighter, his silence a comfort rather than his words. All night long, he cradled you, letting you flood out your emotions. This was when you realized that you didn't need someone to understand, nor to sympathize with you. You just needed someone to be there.

When the mellow sunlight shredded through the night, and your eyes were closed, you could still feel his warmth by your side.

The light outside shone brightly, piercing your eyelids and causing your eyes to flutter open. You looked out the window, the colors in the sky seemed extra brilliant today. Contented, you sighed and turned around in the sheets, finding your drowsy orbs meeting rich green ones. Loki.

He's still here... Your heart shouted with relief. He's actually still here...

Loki had woken up a few minutes before you did, and was surprised to see you both were in the same position as last night―except you were facing away from him. He could still see your features, though. And oh boy, how he admired them. You looked so peaceful, rivulets adorning your face with a small grin tugged at the side of your lips. He longed to softly shake you awake, whispering a sweet endearment just to see that beautiful smile of yours.

Once you did wake up, though, Loki's heart nearly melted. You were looking at him with such an intense gaze, a gaze that seemed to speak more than words do. Amidst the swirling pools of your (E/C) eyes, he could see you were surprised―and glad―to know that he was still beside you.

You silly, silly mortal. Why would I ever want to leave again?

Impetuously, his hand reached out and gently traced the streams your tears made. He started to wonder how many of these dreadful nights you had to endure to finally have one that ended happily.

"I do not understand this, you know." Loki blurted out abruptly.

"Don't understand what?" You asked.

He continued to let his finger follow the streams, "This." Then his hand drifted downward to pick up your scarred wrist, "This." His free left hand moved up to brush against your forehead, "And this."

You blinked, confused.  "W-what do you mean?" He's not planning to reject me, is he?

"It's just... Up on Asgard, we've never had this kind of problem. Asgardians fight using spears, swords, and knives. Yet, here you are, hand empty, but won a war we could never have." Loki said, his voice soft. "You have no idea how much I respect Midgardians for that―especially you. We battle monsters; you battle your own mind, filled with invisible fiends that are just as deadly as they are. It is just very... remarkable."

Your jaw went slack. Coming from Loki, that is a very, very sincere compliment.

"You're saying you... appreciate us?" He nodded.

Although you were astounded, to say the least, you grinned, "Then you must be real glad to have me here then."

Loki chuckled, "Yes, indeed I am." His arms snaked around you to pull you closer. He was running his fingers through your hair when you giggled―rather loudly too. Curious, he raised an eyebrow in question.

"You know, earlier, when I was still struggling, I thought of something." You started.

He just raised his eyebrow higher to tell you to continue.

Your expression turned sheepish, "Well, I might have thought about something along the lines of 'begging for whatever god or higher being that was out there'." But once the words were out, you were thrown into a fit of laughter when you saw both of Loki's eyebrows flying up.

"No, no, it's not something against you," You kept giggling, "Maybe the stars finally heard my prayers and sent you to me."

Recovered from the shock, his signature mischievous smirk stretched across his face, "Maybe they did..." But then you noticed he was trying to crouch down, both of his arms were extended―a pose that made your eyes widen in fear.

"Oh no. Oh hell no. You're not doing that, not again. Get away from me!" You put your hands in front of you defensively, a smile pulling at your lips.

Smirking even wider than before, he resumed, "... But did they expect this?!" And he pounced on you.

The Tickle Fight almost threw you off the bed. Though, in the end, you two were in each other's arms again, laughing wildly.

"I've missed you," You touched his cheek.

"I've missed you more."

You smiled, basking in the warmth of the moment. Then your thoughts drifted to the change in your demeanor―joy, hope, and most of all, love―these are feelings that you thought were buried inside you already. Somehow, against all the odds, you made it through hell alive. You were suddenly filled with expectations for the future, for all the wonderful things you might be experiencing soon, you finally had a chance now.

Against all the odds, again, Loki came back into your life, he was the center of it all once more. You marveled at the very thought of him, how he was still here, how he helped you―something no one had done in a long, long time.

Looking beside you, at this gorgeous being that you didn't deserve, you know that this is all you need.

Kudos for me? <3 Comments makes me happy too.

I'm sorry if I don't know how you'd feel if your parents died. I'm sorry for the shitty structure. I'm sorry for the weak vocabulary. I'm sorry for the teeny writing (even though I *am* a teen)... But I still hope you enjoyed it :D

Sorry if this was too long, lol. Words just came flowing out of my fingertips, hehe.

Remember, if you're battling depression or any other mental illness, don't give up! You're never alone, alright? I'm right here if you want to talk about it. Don't litter your beautiful skin with scars, please.

[animegrlfriend]

I started writing a story based on my own life.

I’m looking for critique or any kind of feedback! If I end up continuing the story, i’ll probably update on here every once in a while.

(all the characters are going to be people that I actually know in my life but the names are changed.) 

It was moments like these that really make you think.

The ones where you catch yourself reflecting on the time when you saw butterflies in a field and felt an urge to catch them, or sunny mornings when the blinds were open and you can feel the warmth of the sun on your skin. On the kind of days that seem so sweet during the weeks that feel too short. It was the time that I met you, when I could see the youthful look in your eyes that I originally fell in love with.

Yet, things changed then and sometimes, we can never go back.

...

  My name is Olive, I live with my dad and my brother. I have no pets. My favourite colour is, you guessed it, not green and I am not good at math. I wear prescription glasses, I'm 5'6 and I have shoulder-length hair.

  I've always wanted to dye my hair a fun and crazy colour but I take such a long time to think over big changes in my life. I didn't get bangs until I had thought it over for two years and my entire life has been planned since I was 5 years old. Yet of course, not matter how much time you invest in planning. There's always a chance that things will always go wrong.

  On a terrible day like this, I prefer to indulge in my feelings and I try very hard to make everyone else around me feel just as bad as I do. I would say this is a coping mechanism but really, I think I'm just instinctively an inconsiderate bitch. On days like this, I would have preferred to stay home and watch movies.

  "I've forgotten what it was like to feel another human's embrace." I explained to my friend, Conrad.

  "Yeah, you say that but I hugged you like, three days ago." Said Conrad.

  "You've got a point there." I said in a defeated tone.

  Our friendship only started a couple months ago due to him hanging out with the wrong crowd, or should I say crowds. Yet, I consider Conrad to be one of my most successful friendships. While we have had one or two somewhat significant arguments, I feel like they've help us become better friends.

   We crossed the street to the convenience store. I always felt anxious while leaving the school but I was having some cravings for chocolate and this was the closest supplier. Conrad and I both went to Clearwater High School. It was rival to the two nearby schools in our city but I liked Clearwater the most. Though, maybe I'm just biased.

  After walking up the concrete path, we eventually got to the store front. There were usually a couple kids from school that would hangout here. I never knew why they felt the need to walk here everyday when they could always just stay on school-grounds. It baffled me but not quite enough for me to ask anyone. - We walked inside.

  "I'm gonna go and see if there's anything good over here." I said to Conrad.

  "Alright, I'll be here with the Slushie machines, I guess." He responded.

  "Don't do anything stupid..." I whispered under my breath as I casually strolled away.

  The inside of the store was a lot warmer than outside. It was a fairly windy day with grey skies. I prefer this kind of weather but I find it irritating when my glasses fog up from the condensation. After wiping my glasses, I saw her; Salsa Martini, my arch nemesis. I might have called myself an inconsiderate bitch but she was Inconsiderate Bitch 2.0. We used to be best friends in middle school but it all changed in the last couple months of 8th grade.

  What actually happened wasn't as bad as I wish it was but in basic terms, I ignored Salsa for almost the entire four years that I knew her and I guess she finally got tired of it. Though, she still gossips about all of the "bad" things I did to her, which are all lies. She's just trying to harm my reputation when in reality she's just insecure and pathetic. I have no sympathy for her. Either way, she was here and I was due for another insufferable meeting with her.

  "Hello, Salsa. How is Cellophane doing? Has he gotten better?" I said to her in a scornful voice.

  Cellophane was her cat. I heard from Conrad that poor Cello had fallen ill recently and no matter how much I love cats, I wanted to rub in her face that she had a sick cat. Since, as you know, I'm an inconsiderate bitch.

  "He's doing fine, thank you for asking." She responded sarcastically.

  I wasn't really offended by that remark since I'm terrible with sarcasm and I didn't realize that it was, indeed, sarcasm. She doesn't deserve my condolences anyway and there was no way in hell that I would express them. Maybe if I were forced against my will but otherwise, it was not going to happen.

  At this point, I found what I was looking for. Chocolate; The one thing that gets me through bad days such as this one. It all started in the morning when I woke up late and didn't want to miss my daily morning-shower so I bolted downstairs. I almost fell a couple times since I'm terribly clumsy but I made it to bathroom without a scratch, thankfully. When I got into the shower, I realized that someone used all of my favourite shampoo. Which totally sucked! It was the only brand that gave my hair a nice shine but didn't make it greasy or too soft. Either way, there was none left and I was just going to have to work with Head and Shoulders that day.

  I eventually paid for a couple of chocolate bars that I picked out and left the store with Conrad.