#i wish things were different ; ;

[6e-n-d6]

Venting on tumblr is lowk kinda shitty of me bc I know ppl have been thru way worse but lowk I think I was born to die LOLLL I can’t stop doing shitty things I was born a shitty person. But i still want comfort to like know im not completely shitty, is that wrong??? To be so selfishly shitty??? When everyone else besides me has it worse? Idk what happened I used to be so happy. It’s always either ‘today is just okay’ or ‘today is horrible and I wanna die and I don’t deserve to live at all’ what fucking happened to me this can’t be normal but im too scared to get diagnosed because that’s proof im broken. Im broken and too whole. I can’t be anything I deserve to die, but I can’t harm myself either bc everyone will be sad about it, why. Why am I gof damn like this I wish I died I wish every attempt fucking worked. If I was lucky they would’ve if I was luckier I wouldn’t have been born broken like this at all. It’s selfish to say im broken bc. A lot of other ppl have it worse. I could be bed bound I could be in poverty I could be in war and famine and crippled and abused but I’m not. Why. My head hates me I wish I wasn’t born #edgymoment lol

[puppyjaws]

Im so fucking sad lol

[moonshadow-thoughts]

Most humans are truly evil beings. They are full of hate, ignorance, greed and lack of empathy and kindness. And our societies are shaped in a way that people with those traits almost always win in life.

[samusisbae]

I'm no one's first choice. I'm not the guy people invite to things. I'm not the one any lover or partner would fight for. I'm the one people talk to when they're feeling bad and then they go on their way. I'm the one people say "you missed out" to. I'm the one that's just wanted for his money.

I'm only wanted for what I can provide, not because people actually want to be around me.

[poetdaughter]

my heart tonight is with black and brown people, with trans people, with women, with undocumented folks, with Palestinians, with poor people and every person in this country and beyond it that will be affected by the results tonight.

[fionas-freedom]

.

[aliendubstep]

really missing you tonight… I wish I wasn’t. I still miss you so much… and I am still very angry and hurt for the way you ended things between us but whatever I guess it just wasn’t meant to be but I am still sad and grieving whatever the fuck we were

[heartspoetry]

“I miss you, man.”

-And I really wish I could tell you that.

[i-am-just-a-skeleton]

can't get any fucking time to myself can i

i hate being responsible and doing useful shit and then having no time to relax and do the things i want to do

[thegirlsoconfused]

going grazy

being afraid of your own self is something that i experienced some years ago. i was afraid of my mind and my actions, more specifically speaking, i was afraid of what actions my mind would make me do. i would think i should and would hurt myself, hurt other people, break objects. having bad thoughts like those put me in a really bad place, mentally and physically. now i know that some people also experience those feelings that were so prominent inside of my head, but at that time i thought i was the only person in the world who was feeling that way and the only person to ever feel that way, i know that sounds kind of crazy. and speaking of sounding crazy, i used to think i was going insane with all that was going on my mind. i wouldn't go out of my house, not even go out of my room. i felt like i wasn't real, like my body wasn't real, people were not real. i would think that maybe i was dreaming, or inside a movie. the feeling of walking was weird, it was like walking on clouds. my vision was like it was always blurred, i don't know how to explain that but even the way i was seeing was different. i would have panic attacks every week, that was a big problem because i also had a lot of anger issues. i used to get angry about everything and then i would hurt myself or break things. therapy and medications helped so much, and i got better. sometimes i still feel like i used to but not with the same intensity, and i'm grateful for that, i'm grateful for getting better. but now i deal with other issues that i still can't describe. the writing on this one was kinda longer and i hope you guys like it because i'm planning on writing more and more on my posts. 

[comfortableinthesilence]

Finally back home after a long and stressful afternoon! Turns out my grandad has a minor heart attack but he's okay! The hospital are keeping him in for observations! I’m tired and down mentally, having kept a brave face on for my rather upset mother but as I reminded her, he’s in the right place! My minds racing with thoughts and the what ifs but I guess that's my burden to bare! Up for work at 5am but so very tempted to take a personal day, so who knows!

Probably going to be up for a few hours as I'm too wired! Feel free to ask me shit to distract my thoughts!

To anyone else that has had a shit day for one reason or another, sending you what good energy I have to you 🫶🏻😌🌻

[sakuramiku]

my mother has this way of making sure to make me feel like garbage and then attempts to gaslight me by claiming it was just a joke.

[tilweareghosts]

All the love is still there.

I just don’t know what to do with it now…

[sickskies]

Of course I can always ask for help. But will I be believed, will I be supported? It’s been going on for so long that I’ve grown accustomed to it. I know it’s wrong, but so many things are. There’s wars, there’s oppression, there’s injustice. I am but a small ant.

And in a sick way, I am okay with the way I am. Everyone is faulty, everyone has their own chips that can’t be fixed no matter how much glue is used.

[fawnin]

my heart hurts

[amarillokidding]

when white ppl switch up as soon as they talk to a white employee. never forgetting this in this life or the next.