#all i want is a friend i can build a life with

[imaginespazzi]

All Fell Down ~ Part 3 ~

paige bueckers x azzi fudd

* masterlist in collaboration with @azzibuckets *

summary: paige and azzi have never really been just best friends

a/n: Hello, hello my lovies <3 I'm so sorry; I literally just fully forgot to post this part yesterday because life has been so very hectic. But I think having an Azzi Fudd masterclass before this chapter is probably ideal. As always let me know your thoughts my loves!

Azzi should have expected the deafening silence that follows Paige’s name leaving her lips. If it wasn’t for the sound of the other girl’s breathing -staggered and heavy- she’d have thought perhaps it was a phantom call with no one on the other end of the line. And really Azzi doesn’t know what she was expecting; doesn’t know why she’d expected anything but exactly this when she’d picked up her phone. But when Paige’s CallerID had flashed on the screen, the buzzing of the ringtone cutting into Azzi’s pity party, there hadn’t been much else in her brain other than this sudden burst of hope. It had taken barely two rings before she was scrambling across her bed, grabbing her phone and hitting the green answer button with far too much vigor. It was one syllable but she’d wrapped Paige’s name in a desperate mixture of i just miss talking to you and please can can we fix this. And she’d gotten nothing in return.

“Paige?” she tries again, fighting the fresh new set of tears threatening to fall from her eyes; she’s lost count of how many times she’s cried tonight. 

There’s a sharp intake of air on the other end but still no response and whatever thin string had been holding the remnants of Azzi’s heart together seems to fray even more.

“Okay,” she breathes out, closing her eyes as she digs her fingernails into her palm, “okay Paige,” she repeats, her tone resigned and ready to accept something that feels a little too much like defeat, “I get it. I guess this was um- this was an accident or something so I’ll uh- I’ll hang-”

“Canyoucomepickmeup?” Paige’s words come out hoarse and slurred together as she cuts Azzi off.

“What?” the brunette’s eyes widen, unsure if she’s heard wrong. 

Azzi hears Paige gulp; can almost picture the blonde chewing at her lips like she usually does when she’s nervous, “I asked if- if you could um- can you come pick me up?”

“I-”

Paige begins to ramble before she can say anything, “it’s just uh- it’s just that the rest of team seems to be having a lotta fun and I- I think maybe I drank too much and my head’s throbbing and Evina says I should go home but-”

“Okay.”

“I can’t drive myself and I don’t- I don’t wanna ruin anybody else’s night-” Paige cuts herself mid sentence, taking a second to process what Azzi had just said, “wait- okay?”

The brunette has already slipped off her bed, rummaging around her bedside table for her car keys. She thinks she’s probably giving in a little too easily, thinks she should probably be more pissed at Paige’s audacity to not speak to her for two weeks and then call her out of nowhere to ask for a mundane favor. But it’s Paige. Her Paige. And Azzi knows that if the blonde asked her to show her the stars, she’d find a way to steal the whole night sky for her.

“Okay,” Azzi confirms as she slips into her sneakers, “I should be there in a couple of minutes.”

“You’re actually coming,” Paige’s voice is slightly dazed. 

There’s a pang in Azzi’s chest at the slight surprise in her best friend’s tone. It’s a testament to how much has changed between them. Those unspoken promises of we’ll always be there for each other that had been the solid foundation of their relationship seem to be clouded by fears of are we still the same us? It hits her then the depth of the abyss between them. They’re stranded on opposite sides of it and Azzi just hopes they still have enough strength to build a bridge over it and get to each other again. 

“Do you still want me to come?” she asks timidly as she steps out into the wintry Storrs air. It’s freezing cold but Azzi thinks it’s nothing compared to the way she knows her heart will ice over if Paige says no. 

That familiar silence lingers between them as Azzi waits for Paige to say something. It feels like that’s all she’s done for the past two weeks. Waited. She’d waited for the answers to her list of ever-growing questions as Paige had pulled further and further away from her. She’d waited to catch her best friend’s avoidant eyes so she could try and decipher the storm brewing in them. She’d waited, arms outstretched, for her Paige to come back to her. But she thinks that if Paige says no now, if Paige decides to keep building this wretched wall between them instead of helping Azzi tear it down, then she won’t wait again. Because the weight of waiting is just too much and there’s only so much longer that Azzi can hold on. 

“Evina said to go home,” Paige’s voice trembles when she finally speaks, “she said to go home and all I could think of- was you.”

“Paige,” Azzi whispers. 

“Azzi,” and that same desperation from before echoes in Paige’s tone, “please come take me home.”

[orchidyoonkook]

Diving back into your glory with the second response! Kiki you once again absolutely spoil me. I had the biggest damn smile and the giggles reading through this <3

okay so the first thing that caught my eye was the warning yoon why????? a whole jk and ady warning i can't i don't think i can make it through them fucking 😩😩😩

I'm a big believer in not shying away from writing things that may make people uncomfortable. Especially if I find it to be crucial for the plot, like it is here. It's a very important back and forth, metnal conversation, sen reactions and visual scene and it. is. important!! THEREFORE! you get a warning that it is going to happen to prep yourself! I know folks dont really side pairings a lot of the time when the sex is included with them, but in this case I needed it to show an important contrast so I kept it in.

also! Because I can. :)

(this is also why i will fight to the death for all my horror, yandere, boundary pushing writers. Just because their work makes YOU (general use) uncomfortable or upset, doesnt make them wrong for writing it)

like oc and nel i can handle but jk and ady ugh nooooooo our boy our prince not her please anyone else i can take but not her (i just realized the hate train towards ady is strong damn my loyalty to oc ain't cracking) so i am just going to power through that part and take the angst that comes with it (which I welcome)

I hope you were able to see why it was needed!! (let me know if you wanna!) and I appreciate your dedication so much. I know it's tough when it's obvious to you as the reader why something probably shouldnt happen and ngl that makes it wayyyyyyyy more fun to write.

i did notice that subtle hint at of using someone and the fantasies uhmmmmm ok that must be the upside...

noooooooooooooooooo comment 😈

I honestly wonder why oc isn't mentioning her friendship with jk I honestly love it it's giving me little tingles,

She went over her reasoning in chapter three!! ☺ but that was a while ago so I cant blame you there. In a terribly summary she essentially wants to stay out of the public eye, keep the prince happy because she does emjoy his company, and not cause any drama with friends and family.

That being said! I love it too

i don't think i mentioned it but uhm this slow burn is everything its freaking burning and i think oc is definitely feeling it now that jk is with someone, the little encounter at the cafe and the texting they are just adorable and fluffy my face hurts from the smiles...

This is one of my favourite parts of the story. The banter, the subtle jabs, the build up upon build up, the realising of things and denying them, just all of it. Slow burns are my bread and butter, i can devour them always, and apparently I can somewhat write them too. Which is pretty cool

I just love how they have these opinions about each other's partners like the red flags they each see but they are all about each other's happiness, oc held back with ady but oooh jk isn't 😂 you go boy you tell her gosh i love his character in that scene....

This is another contrast!! It's intentional!! I love that you noticed because I try to be subtle about it. They both have their issues and deal with it in their own ways. OC very much deals with it in a small town girl way, whereas the freaking prince is, shockingly (not) very confrontational. I love that theyre opposites in this way.

oc and nel's scene had me pausing cause i literally went why the heck is she thinking about jk at a time like this and then she said it too it was epic oh oc you give me the giggles😂

AHA i LOVE this. I also love the fact their yours and her lines of thinking lined up. That's actually really nice feedback in a way because it means I was able to write OC in a way that actually mimics real life thought patterns when in certain situations and thats REALLY COOL to hear as the writer from the reader.

Also! Happy to make you giggle! Humor is another thing I struggle with writing wise, so I'm glad I can make you crack a smile now and then with mine.

wait what she didn't finish?!?!??!?!?! THIS IS MY ACTUAL REACTION IT'S LIKE OC IS IN MY HEAD ANSWERING ALL MY QUESTIONS OC BABYGIRL NO DIDN'T YOU LITERALLY GIVE YURI ADVICE ABOUT HER DATE AND NOW THIS 😩😩😩

The best advice often comes from those who have experience with things one way or another.

Ex: I never dated in highschool and yet I was the person ALLLLLLL of my friends came too for their relationship advice.

So, my darling OC was just looking out for her bestie in that regard imo, as someone who has trouble in that aspect of her life.

and we jump straight into jk's horror I can't help it this back to back is amazing, not me shouting no through out his entire scene why jk why, here's oc is having trouble and ady on her fourth whyyyyyyyy he better have oc on his mind

YOU DID SEE HOW THE BACK TO BACK WAS IMPORTANT!!!! YAYAYAYAYAY!!

oh I'm so happy, literally this was the "let me know if you wanna" from earlier. This is what I was hoping for!!

JK is allowed to make bad decisions every now and then unfortunately as no one is perfect and no one has perfect coping mechanisms the first time they encounter new problems. He's human, and therefore is prone to making poor human mistakes.

as for the orgasm ratio....noooo comment :)

i love how jungkook says nels name in full i can literally picture the disgust and the face he would pull (cue oc eye roll) italics and all..

AHA I love this. This is probably my fave part im sorry becaue I wrote this in intentionally as sort of a joke that turns into a habit and it's just.....so him. And i adore it because its SO. PETTY. and I live for it.

i am writing this as i read so everything scene/sentence i go to write something on my notepad so i hope it all makes sense

it does!!

and let's just say when he shut her up the scene was better to read

As the writer, I'm cackling. As a reader, FACTS.

ugh jungkook likes oc he likes her fuck can they get together already i am dying here this chapter was perfect (even if ady was in it) like the build up and their thoughts both being on each other oh that tension is building i love the progression between them and the next chapter is gone be golden ahhhhhh lemme run over

Literally the only response I can think to give is just a bunch of these guys: 😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈 and then a giant THANKYOU!

yoon you beautiful genius you have my heart this fic is everything and it's getting more and more captivating as it goes along i can't wait to see what more you do in this series seriously yoon with every update i go back and re-read everything again and I am in awe every single time and your talent, like this should be printed like i want a physical copy when it's done you are brilliant and such a star for coming up with this ily yoon i hope you know that 🥹🖤

SOBBING IN THE CLUB KIKI. THERES A SPOTLIGHT ON ME, IM IN THE MIDDLE OF THE CROWD OF DANCING PEOPLE AND IM SOBBING.

And funfact! I can actually bind this when I'm done with it as I am slowly gathering all the materials I need in order to do so. So maybe one day it will have a physcial copy (or two)!

Once again I feel nothing but warmth and love and light and kindness from your beautiful words. As much as I enjoy writing, it's words like yours and lovely folks like you that make me want to keep writing.

Thankyou. Truly, truly.

Xo, Yoon.

To What We Were Before, And All The Things After | JJK | Ch. 6 | M

Title: Eastern Arrivals and Unwanted Doubt

Pairing: Prince!College Student!JK x Fine Arts Major!(F)!Reader

Series Rating//Genre: (M) | College AU, Mild Royalty AU, Smut, Angst, Fluff, S2F2L, Indiffernce to lovers, sloooowwww ass burn

Summary: Nel's here for the week and you couldn't be more excited!! Jungkook's another story though...

Warnings: M, fluff, smut, swearing, drinking, pining, angsstt, slight boundary pushing (not sexual), unwanted/ unneeded overprotectiveness, jealousy, lying, [reader eats bacon and eggs but it's not specified what kind or where it's from, just bacon and eggs, so whether that means veggie, vegan or normal is up to you], intentional pissing off of Nel, a little spat between major characters, sex as a plot device.

Mature warnings under the cut.

Word Count: 6,945

Release Date: April 20, 2:00PM

A/N 1: 6 months later and we have chapter 6! slow updates, but they will be written and they will be posted. I have no plans to abandon this, I just, very unfortunately, have a bit of an outernet life now. So not a lot of free time to be creative which I hate. But it's here!!

Series: Chapter One | Chapter Two | Chapter Three | Chapter Four | Chapter Five

Mature Warnings: Consensual sex x 2, both reader with Nel and JK with Ady -> sorry not sorry cuz it's plot sex. We got us some: kissing, protected sex (as we should), missionary, fingering, oral (f. rec), tiny bit of groping (consenual), multiple orgasms, loud sex, like annoyingly, sex as a terrible coping mechanism (imo), fantasizing.

Bouncing lightly from foot to foot, you’re buzzing after finally receiving the text you were waiting on a few minutes ago.

Nelly <3 [10:10pm]: Landed. See you soon 😘

He’s almost here. He’s almost here!

Just a few more seconds until—

The gates slide open. A flood of people in a mixture of sweats and business casual wear with luggage of all sizes and neck pillows walk through. You hold up the sign above your head with both hands, a smile that could outshine the sun plastered on your face, and search.

Where is he? Where is he, where is he, where is he, you think as you scour the bodies filing out of the automatic doors. You can’t see him. He’s none of the nameless faces that pass you by as they find their family, friends or rides. 

Is this even the right group of people? What if his luggage got lost and he won’t be out with this group. What if he got taken aside for some reason, and now he’s being held in some dusty room being asked a bunch of stupid questions he doesn’t know how to answer? What if he’s fig—

But then there’s a gap in the crowd, and the boy you’ve spent the last half decade of your life with comes into perfect, crystalline view. His lips pulled taught, teeth beautifully bared as he sets his sights on your sign high in the air, then down to you.

And you're running. 

You’re running and dodging and swerving until you’re jumping into Nels arms as he abandons his suitcase in favour of keeping you both up right. He buries his face into your neck, holding you so tightly you think he’ll never let go. And that’s just fine with you as you hold on just as tight, taking in a big breath of him too. 

He smells like airplane and coastal breeze and most importantly, home. 

Nel smells like home.

A muffled, “Ohhhhhhh, I missed you,” greets your ears, and you melt into him even more if that's even possible.

“I missed you too,” you say, pulling back and kissing him. You don’t really care if there’s an audience or not right now. Not when Nel’s here, and he’s in your arms, and he’s yours for a whole 9 days and life is as it should be once again.

He releases his hold slightly, but your arms don’t leave his shoulders. The sign still clutched, now crushed and crinkled, in one hand. 

“Car?” he asks, a kiss to your nose.

“This way,” you lead, releasing your hold.

Luckily, his suitcase is small, so he forgoes rolling it, instead gripping the handle at the top and carrying it in one hand. Your own reaching for his other and not letting go. He’s going to have to peel you off him if he wants space right now. 

Nel’s wearing his usual fall attire; a dark green school sweater that has ‘ECAD’ written over the chest in a large, academic looking mustard yellow font, regular old blue jeans, and dark brown lace up boots. His short, dirty blond hair's covered by a hat you’d gotten him as a highschool graduation present, and his ocean blue eyes remain as gorgeous as they were the day you met. 

Passing through doors to the outside and back to lot J, you hop in the car as he puts his bag in the trunk.

“How have you been? What’s new? What’s not? Tell me everything,” he asks as he climbs in and sits beside you, hand finding yours again. 

Never gone for too long. You relish in the comfort and happiness that alone brings you. 

He’s finally here. You finally have him back.

“I’m great. Yuri’s still Yuri, classes are only a little more challenging this year, but I’m still at the top of them,” Nel slips in a ‘not surprised’ and you smile brighter as you continue. “They’re already telling us to start brainstorming ideas for our thesis show next year,” you have no idea what you’re going to do, but you’re working on it. “Campus is the same, dorms are the same, the cafe’s the same. Though, they have the egg tarts I like in more, which is awesome for my taste buds and terrible for my bank account.” 

Vivian stayed true to her word, and now they had the tarts in every week. 

“I can only imagine,” Nel jokes.

“Uhhmm, what else…” a thought pops up, and you guess you can tell him. It doesn’t reveal anything the whole world doesn’t already know. “The prince is dating Adaline Dupree.”

His eyebrows raise, remembering, “Oh yeah, that’s right, the prince goes to your school now.”

“Yep.”

“Have you met him?”

Is he seriously not completely shocked at the prince dating Adaline? You only bitched about her to him all the time.

“Uhhh… yep, once or twice, I guess.” 

You hate it. You hate lying, especially to Nel. You hate it so much, but it’s for the greater good. It’s to keep the peace. But that doesn’t stop the burning feeling in your chest nor the roil in your belly.

“The day he arrived Yuri dragged me down to see him speak. She made us sit front row because Yuri,” Nel nods, knowing exactly what you mean. “He had everyone assemble to hear why he was at school and tell us not to treat him like a prince. He wants to be able to study without his title getting in the way.”

You hit your blinker, making a one handed left turn. 

“Makes sense. Is he nice at least?” Nel doesn’t sound at all suspicious, and why should he? You’ve never given him reason to not believe you at your word before. Never lied to him before.

Fuck you hate this so much. It was so much easier when he was 5000 miles away. But now that he's right beside you? This week may end up being more difficult than you thought.

“He was very princely. Tried to kiss my hand like he did like every other girl there, but I made it a handshake instead. Figured if he wants to be treated like everyone else, I would liste—Oh!” you laugh before you can even get the words out.

“What?” he asks, intrigued but confused.

You can barely speak coherently. “You should have seen Yuri’s face when I called him Jungkook and not Prince or Your Highness...her eyes nearly fell out of her head,” tears are starting to form from laughing so hard. “It was great.”

“He didn’t mind?” Nel asks and you shake your head. Yuri’s face that day will forever be seared into your brain for whenever you need a pick-me-up. 

“No, he was grateful actually. I was the first person that had addressed him like that, the way he’d asked to be.” Stopping at a red light, you're finally regaining yourself.

“Well,” he squeezes your hand, “you always were good at first impressions,” and looks at you so softly you can’t help but smile into the kiss you give him. 

He remembers that school art fair just as fondly as you do. 

Nel pulls away first with a thought. “Is Yuri with us this time?” 

Yuri hadn’t been able to go home last year, her parents too busy on a work trip, so she stayed back and kicked it with you two, but also gave you your space when needed.

Lots and lots of space.

“Nope! Parents welcomed her with open arms this afternoon, I’m sure. They’re all on some tropical island down south. She’s bringing me an ocean bottle though, so I’m excited for that. It’s been a while since I’ve been able to add a new one.”

Everytime you travelled somewhere with a beach you got a glass bottle and filled it with half sand, half water, added in some shells or rocks and labelled it. Instead of towels, keychains, or magnets, you did ocean bottles. They lined a shelf in your room back home. 

You probably have at least fifteen of them by now. Your mum likes to travel and make sure you experience the world around you, not just your little corner of it.

“Oh that’s great babe! I know how much you love those.”

“Yeah, it is.” You lean your head on his shoulder, basking in his presence for as long as the light remains red. 

He’s here. He’s yours. 

You only have to do this for a couple more years and then you’ll be together all the time. God you can’t wait. But you are nothing if not disciplined. 

And it’s going to be so worth it in the end.

The rest of the ride to your dorm goes by quickly. 

Some more red lights, some more kisses. You point out the same things you always do on the way back, and Nel acts like it’s the first time he’s seen them, just like he always does.

His hand never leaves yours over the center console. 

Soon enough, you find yourselves flopping down on your bed. Bags, jackets and shoes, scattered. Nel pulls you into him, his head on your pillow, yours lying on his chest. True peace settling in for the first time in months.

“I can't wait until we’re done school and I have more than four and a half months with you a year,” he sighs.  “It’s not enough. I want more. Need more.”

“Me too. But good things come to those who wait.”

“Yeah…I’m just really sick of waiting.” 

“Me too,” you repeat in a yawn. 

Nel’s breathing slowly evens out as you lie there, content to be in your arms again. And you look up to see his eyes closed, warm exhales brushing over your face from his nose. 

You can’t blame him for being so tired. He’d had an early morning exam before flying out, even brought his suitcase to it so he could leave the second he was done. Then, the flight alone was ten hours, plus travel times to and from the airports was about an hour each way, and the wait time before boarding was another two. 

Shit, he’s probably been awake for around eighteen hours straight at this point because he’s also the type that can’t sleep on planes no matter what he tries. 

Oh, Nel...Of course he’s exhausted.

Giving him a squeeze before getting up, you take off his socks and jeans carefully, then tuck him into bed as much as you can. You’d try the sweater, but it involved too many working parts and you didn’t want to wake him, so you figure it’s best to have the window open tonight instead. 

Grabbing your phone, you tiptoe to the bathroom and do your night time routine. It’s not an overly complicated one, just brushing your teeth, washing your face and a simple 3 step skincare routine of cleanser, toner and moisturizer. Short and sweet, but it does the job. 

Halfway through brushing, you do your friend due diligence and send Yuri a ‘back safe’ text, just like she’d sent you her own ‘here safe’ when she’d landed.

You spit and rinse, moving onto washing your face and applying cleanser.

Teeth clean and face moisturized, you sneak into your room again. Nel's still out cold. 

You sneak out of habit—your mom wakes at the sound of a pin dropping. But absolutely nothing could wake Nel now outside of his mother’s voice and his morning alarm. It’s a talent of his you’ve always been jealous of.  

Removing today's clothes and tossing them in your overflowing hamper—reminder to self: do laundry—you slide on your pjs and climb into bed beside him, plugging in your phone and setting it down. 

A thought pops into your head and you pick it back up, shooting a quick text before you can think twice. 

You [11:26pm]: home safe

It pings not seconds later.

PJK [11:26pm]: Thanks Picasso  PJK [11:27pm]: glad ur home safe

Your heart beats a little louder at the nickname, and you chalk it up to the excitement still in you at having Nel here and being tired. 

But you sleep better that night than you have in a long time. 

A short, repetitive, rhythmic vibration. 

Picasso [11:26pm]: home safe

Jungkook is still standing in the same corner by the wall, Adaline somewhere in the crowd in front of him dancing with her friends. She asked him to join her, but he declined. He doesn’t need to see himself more than half drunk and dancing on the cover of tomorrow’s news cycles. Not to mention his security team would shut the party down the second a camera flashed.

His guards are carefully stationed throughout the house, all dressed down in casual wear, a few with empty cups in their hands. One is watching some sort of beer pong like game in the corner, another is mingling with some guys over in the kitchen. Three he can’t immediately see. And he knows his head guard is outside in a black car ready to get him out at a moment's notice.

Nobody can tell they aren’t here for the party, not unless they’re sober enough to notice watchful eyes continually making their way over the crowd as the night goes on. 

Your text woke him from the stillness he’s adapted from standing so long, trying hard not to draw attention to himself. 

You were home safe. Home safe from the airport. Home safe from picking up Cornelius. 

Your boyfriend. 

Cornelius, your boyfriend. 

He doesn’t acknowledge his teeth grinding.

You were home from picking up your beau but even then, you’d texted him to let him know you were back on campus safely. To let him know you were okay. 

It’s the first thing that makes him smile all night.

So he sends back, a bit to quickly: 

Me [11:26pm]: Thanks Picasso Me [11:26pm]: glad ur home safe

Because it means something to him that you deem him close enough to send a ‘home safe’ text too. 

That you want him to know you’re back.  

Want him to know you’re safe.

Whether you know it or not, your safety means a lot to Jungkook, so that little two word text makes his heart lurch. 

He needs to leave. 

He needs to get out of this fucking house and back to his dorm. He came, he drank, he observed, he fulfilled his boyfriend duty.

That’s enough for him. 

He shoots Adaline a text that says he isn’t feeling well and gets out as fast as he possibly can, dodging bodies left and right and doing his best to hide his face. 

Once he’s out, security team in tow, the cooling midnight air does him some good. 

“Someone make sure she gets back to her dorm safe,” he says in their general direction, brain too muddled to be polite in this exact moment, but it’s nothing they haven’t seen before. 

This is going to be such a long week.

He can’t wait till it’s over. Till he doesn’t have to share anymore. 

He was never very good at it anyway. 

The smell of bacon wakes you. 

And toast, and…

Eggs? 

You think, at least. Since when do you have bacon? Or eggs? Toast is a given, it’s part of your life’s blood.

Opening your eyes, you blindly reach for your phone, successfully unplugging it and bringing it to your face.

The screen is too bright but you suffer through it, squinting.

9:27am. 

9:27? 

You slept for ten hours!?

You can’t remember the last time you slept more than 6 consecutively, aside from recovery nights, and even then it was fitful.

Nel comes in with two plates, his full with a very Eastern breakfast of pancakes, scrambled eggs and bacon. Yours with two pieces of toast, lots of bacon, a bit of eggs and some fruit. Where did he—?

He smiles at your confusion, “You have a cafeteria that sells breakfast food, you know.”

You know that.

“I know that.”

“Do you? Because the look on your face says otherwise.”

You flop back down and pull the pillow over your head, mumbling incoherent nonsense. You rarely used the dorm cafeteria for breakfast. Much preferring the greenhouse cafe or simple toast and juice that you can make in your dorm.

He chuckles. “Two breakfasts for me then, okay, if you insist,” Nel moves to leave but you screech, uncovering your face.

“Noo! I want it. Please, sweet nutrition,” he hands the plate over when you sit up, arms out stretched, and you dig in. 

After a piece of bacon, you ask, “How long have you been up?”

Nel’s sitting with his legs crossed at the end of your bed, munching away, “Long enough to get changed, grab my wallet, get food and come back.”

The bacon is really good. You’ve never been so glad he knew you so well as you grab another piece from the dwindling pile.

“You slept well then, too? That’s good, I’m glad. You needed the rest.”

“Having you around always makes it easier to fall asleep,” he nudges your knee with his elbow.

Even after five years he can still make you blush.

“I know the feeling.”

You two fall into step, starting your weeks in advance prepared plans, the rest of your day passing quickly. 

Too quickly. 

And so does the next day, and the next, and the next. 

All of your activities are going great. The zoo, picnics, study dates, restaurant dates, historical, artistic and architectural museum tours. Even a swim at the school’s indoor pool, and there’s plenty more to come. 

Things slip back into being easy, just as they always have been with Nel, ever since that first day back in tenth grade. 

He knows you like the back of his hand and predicts your moves before you make them, just like you do for him. 

You know his favourite foods, and where he prefers to park when driving—always avoiding open curbs—you know his dream travel destinations, and who his favourite musicians are. You know his favourite pencils to design with and his favourite pencils to shade with, that he always put on his right sock first, then right shoe, then left sock and left shoe. You know that his drink order is an iced coffee with two cream and two sugar, that he prefers loose shirts over fitted ones, and that his favourite colour is orange.

It’s a pretty orange too, not just any orange. You wonder if it’s anything like Jungkook's–

Wait. 

You search your memory for the information, going through favourite foods, drinks, music—all discussed previously, because you know their answers. But colour?

Nothing.

How have you never asked what Jungkook’s favourite colour is?

Isn’t that usually one of the first things people ask when they’re trying to get to know one another? Funny. Guess you’ll have to inquire the next time you see him. 

Anyways, just like you know everything there is to know about Nel, he knows everything about you too, including your routines. 

Which is why at twelve noon every day, he starts getting ready to go to the greenhouse for your afternoon study session.

Including today.  

Your week’s already half over and you hate it. Time always moves far to fast when all you want it to do is slow the fuck down. 

You only have five days left. Five days.

You’re lucky the greenhouse cafe is open during break, some places on campus are required to stay open for the students who can’t make it home, but greenhouse chooses to. 

As you and Nel turn the corner you see a familiar figure sitting in his old spot at the back of the patio. The same hat, mask and hoodie, now paired with a leather jacket on top due to the weather starting to cool down.

You can tell Jungkook wasn’t expecting to see you by the way he stiffens before those all too familiar brown eyes of his meet your own. Which is fair, your schedule shifts a bit when you’re on break, he isn’t used to you being here at twelve on Wednesdays. 

But as quickly as he sees you, his gaze is back on his laptop, like he never saw you in the first place. 

Like you asked him to do. 

And a sharp pain stings inside your chest.

When you and Nel get to your table, he sits in the seat opposite to where you always do, leaving where Jungkook usually sits beside you, empty. 

A part of you is grateful for that, though you can’t figure out why and table that self discussion for a later date. 

Setting down your things, you ask Nel if he wants coffee. He answers yes, like always, and after a quick visit with Viv, you're pulling out your chair and setting down your cups. Your back faces Jungkook. It’s a small mercy you can’t see him. Maybe you can forget he’s here and actually focus on your work. 

But it’s also exactly because of your position, that you can’t see as Jungkook subtly watches you over the rim of his laptop while you and Nel talk quietly and study. 

Nel can though. 

It feels weird to ignore him. To pretend you don’t know one another when for the better part of the last seven weeks all you’ve done is talk, hang out, study or a mixture of the three, every day. 

When having him sit behind you and not beside you feels so wrong and so foreign. 

But this is your own doing, you caused this. So you need to suck it up and get used to it. 

This is exactly what you asked for all those weeks ago. The perfect solution to your problem. 

No one can know. 

Not Nel. 

Not anyone. 

But fuck, if it didn’t absolutely suck in practice. 

Setting some of your books out around you and on the table Jungkook usually uses, you dig into your business homework. Having a major and a minor are great for job prospects, on paper, and in practice after you’ve completed them.

But getting them? It takes years of hard work and dedication with no distractions. 

None.  

You spend almost every free moment you have doing homework or practicing, trying to get ahead, trying to stay on top.

…Trying to beat Adaline. 

But you just use that as fuel for your drive to be better. To be the best. 

Competition is healthy. Especially when you’re winning against the rich brat who’s used to getting what she wants. 

Not that you're petty.

Ehh…You are. But only a little bit. At least you can admit it.

Nel gets to work as well, the sunlight from his spot is great for drawing. He’s working on a rough version of his thesis project that’s due at the end of the year. He has to have multiple completed renderings as well as a scale model, and he’s been brainstorming since last year about what he wants to do.

Currently, he’s drawing up an airport, trying to design so that it’s not confusing and complicated for first time users. 

However, his occasional swearing and muttering to himself makes you think he’s having a tough time with it. 

You try not to laugh, but a small giggle slips out. 

“What,” Nel asks, a little distracted.

“Nothing.”

“No really, what’s up? I could use a laugh right now,” he insists, eyes on you at first. But then something behind you steals their attention every few seconds. 

Someone. 

“You just…you still make funny sounds when you're frustrated with a drawing. It’s endearing.” You reach to place your hand on his knee, trying to gain back his full attention. 

Ignore him, Nel. Please ignore him. 

“Yeah...” he exhales. “I guess airports are out,” his hand covers yours quickly and you hear a faint chair screech from behind you. Nel doesn’t miss it as he says. “But I do have a much bigger appreciation and understanding for all those who came before me,” pupils now unmoving from their target behind you. 

Fine. 

You’ll acknowledge it. 

“Is everything okay? You keep looking at something? Is there an animal or…” You know what he’s looking at, but go so far as to turn anyway, playing up the ‘confused girlfriend’ role. But Nel squeezes your hand, stopping you. 

He leans in, placing a fake mask of serene on and lowers his voice. “That guy keeps looking at us, moreso you. And he looks pissed off.”

Fuck, think of something.

Anything. Anythi—Oh!

You lean in too, so close your noses almost touch. “He’s probably just upset we’re talking. The greenhouse cafe is usually a quiet place to work,” good enough, you think. That’s believable, right?. “It’ll be fine. Let’s just ignore him and get back to work.”

You place a quick kiss on his lips but Nel isn’t letting up on his unnecessary vigilance. But then again, he doesn’t know that Jungkook is the opposite of a threat to you. So you reassure him, in your own way.  

“Babe, seriously. If you’re going to be all protective or whatever, don’t. I come here everyday when you're not here and I’m still alive and unharmed. Go get a sandwich or a refill to get your head off of it and say hi to Viv. She’s still here, and I’m betting she remembers you. You’re kinda hard to forget.” 

You can tell Nel’s about to reject the idea when you insist. “I’ll be fine, Nel. Promise. Three years and not a scratch on me.” 

He sighs through his nose, but relents. 

Placing his drawing pad on the table, he gets up, but not before placing another kiss to your forehead and mumbling, “Scream ‘cumquat’ if you’re in danger and I’ll come running, okay?” 

You laugh outright at that. “Will do.”

You watch him as he goes, and the second he’s inside, you’re racing for your phone, typing at an astounding speed.

You [1:45pm]: Didn’t your royal upbringing teach you not to stare so blatantly!??? Nel caught you

You hear a quiet ping from behind you followed by a small exhale that sounds more like a disguised chuckle. 

PJK [1:45pm]: Yes.  

You [1:45pm]: So you intentionally got caught?

PJK [1:45pm]: Maybe

You [1:45pm]: Shithead

PJK [1:46pm]: Rude

You [1:46pm]: You deserve it

PJK [1:46pm]: I know. I’m just making sure he’s treating you right.  PJK [1:47pm]: and trying to see if he acts differently when he knows he’s being watched. He’s very protective you know 

Jungkook saw the second Nel noticed he was watching you. 

His posture changed from easy going to on alert. His hand went so quickly to yours on his knee and his public displays of affection increased significantly. 

It was pathetic, really. It went above a normal amount of protection. Nel was claiming his ‘property’, making sure Jungkook knew not to touch. 

And the nasty look Nel gave him as he entered the cafe—gratefully still unrecognizable in his disguise—was another silent way to say back off, stay away, and don’t try anything or you’ll regret it. 

It was a red flag in Jungkook's mind. A small one, but it’s still there because his efforts are completely unneeded. After five years together, Nel should know that you can handle yourself. 

Hell, Jungkook knows that and it’s only been two months. 

You [1:47pm]: yes I know he is, and I already told you he treats me well because he always. Does. Not just in public or under watchful eyes  You [1:48pm]: and since when does my boyfriend of half a decade need your ~princely~ seal approval?

He ignores the small jab. You only ever brought up his title when you were mocking or upset with him. And he knows that in this case it's the latter.

PJK [1:48pm]: Since now PJK [1:49pm]: And it’s not that I don’t trust you at your word, but I usually like to decide for myself

That has you reeling. 

Where does he get the audacity to think he has any say in or about your relationship? Your very solidly built, five years strong, healthy, happy relationship?

Because he’s the Prince? You’re pretty sure you established on day one that you didn’t and still don’t give a fuck about his birthright. 

If he thinks he gets an opinion on any of this he’s got another thing coming the second he asks you anything about Adaline again. 

You’re in the middle of typing out a paragraph explaining all of this when another text comes in.  

PJK [1:49pm]: Because I’ve seen far too many women in love who are blind to certain things PJK [1:50pm]: And far too many hurt in the end because of it. 

You pause. Fingers frozen mid swipe.

Blind to what?

How many women did he know that were in love but missing something about their partner? Surely there couldn't be that many. Right? 

But this was Jungkook you were talking to, he’s lived numerous lifetimes already. That fancy birthright of his you don’t care about having given him far too many life experiences to have at his age. And they’re only going to increase from here.

So instead of hitting send and cursing him out quite spectacularly, you stop and think for a moment. 

What did he see that they didn’t? 

That you might… not?

You’re a decent judge of character if your record tracks. And it does. 

So your curiosity gets the better of you as you delete your rage paragraph and settle for a simple two word question instead. 

You [1:50pm]: Like what?

You can see that he’s typing out a response but the bell on the cafe door rings and you put your phone down. It buzzes with his response a few seconds after. 

You’ll check it later.

Nel takes his seat again, and you notice he has his sandwich, but also that he’s moved his chair and starts sketching from the new position giving him a direct eye line with Jungkook. 

You internally scoff at that. 

Nel has always been protective. But he was raised that way and you don’t mind too much. You don’t expect him to change his core values for you, just like he never expects you to change yours for him, even when a couple of his are just the slightest bit overbearing. 

But that’s part of a relationship. Give and take and compromise. No one person is going to be perfect for another. It’s healthy to have differences. 

That being said, Nel doesn’t change positions for the rest of the hour. Even as Jungkook packs up and leaves, Nel eyeballs him until he’s out of sight. 

That night while Nel is brushing his teeth and you're lying in bed, you check the text from Jungkook. 

PJK [1:51pm]: Like if they’re getting treated the way they should be or if they’re settling for the best they think they can get or for the first guy that showed interest. The one who hasn’t grown up even though time has passed. The one who’s holding her back by not setting her free

You stare at your phone. At the text. At his words. 

And dismiss it. 

You aren’t one of those women. 

You know yourself. 

You know what you deserve and how you should be treated. You didn’t settle, you just happened to find your love at a young age. That’s something special and rare and should be protected. And Nel has most certainly grown up as time passed. 

Jungkook is being ridiculous for absolutely no reason. Surely he’ll have seen that today. Seen how Nel loves you, treats you how you deserve to be treated, holds you up. Supports you. 

You’re confident he’ll be eating his words soon enough.

Finished brushing, Nel comes back to the bedroom and snuggles up behind you and you put down your phone. 

He cuddles you for a minute before placing a kiss at your neck. Then another. And another before he’s mouthing up your neck, and sliding a hand up your thigh and to your waist. It pauses on your stomach with teasing caresses, before dipping lower and lower, beneath the fabric of your sleep shorts, and under the elastic of your underwear. 

A small moan sounds in your throat at the touch. His fingers meeting your folds and the sensitive bundle of nerves at their apex.

You wanted this. 

Need it. 

He’s grown, you think; as a finger slips in you and you gasp at the stretch, legs opening wider for him. A second finger plunges in and you can feel yourself getting wetter and wetter with every thrust. Just like you can feel a bulge forming behind you. 

You know what you deserve; as he uses them to scissor you open, making sure you’re ready. You roll over, now on your back with Nel over you as he pulls your shorts and underwear down to get better access, your own hands removing your shirt.

You’re not settling; as Nel moves down, tongue making a couple swipes at your entrance and you hiss in pleasure before he’s reaching over, grabbing a condom from the nightstand drawer and sliding it on, length hard and dripping at the sight of you bared before him. 

Nel wasn’t the first guy who’d shown interest, just the first you’d said yes to; and he slides in. Both of you moaning at the snug fit.

“Fuck...” he says and you nod, agreeing, before pulling him down into a deep kiss.

He eases into a slow, steady rhythm that has you breathy and his abs tensing. 

But it’s not enough. You need more. You need to erase these past two months without him, and take enough to last for the next two. It’s never enough, but you try. 

“Faster baby,” you beg, “Please…faster.”

Nel isn’t holding you back. Jungkook doesn’t know what the fuck he’s talking about. 

Nel picks up the pace and you start moaning, louder like you know he likes. Likes to hear he’s doing a good job. He’s grabbing your breast and sucking in a nipple, tongue swirling and you're bringing your hips to meet his with every thrust. 

It feels good. It always feels good with Nel. 

He was your first everything. First kiss, first intimate touch, first love. 

Only love.

And he makes you feel good with that love. That touch. His kiss.

He makes you feel safe, inside and out. 

Jungkook can go eat grass. He doesn’t know your relationship. Doesn’t know the first thing about it. 

“There, right there!” you whine as Nel hits your sweet spot once and you arch. He tries again but misses, continuing faster, his peak coming quickly. 

Jungkook can never understand what you two have. What you two have built in these five years. The understanding and security that comes with it. 

He’s being an unrightfully opinionated ass on something he knows nothing about and— 

Fuck! Why are you thinking about Jungkook? You’re having sex with Nel. You shouldn’t be thinking about anything or anyone other than that. 

Than him. 

So why can’t you get what Jungkook said out of your fucking head?

“Ahhh… oh fuck. I’m cumming.” Nel’s hips stutter, his face contorting in pleasure as he releases, filling the condom.

You kiss him passionately to rid yourself of your princely plagued thoughts, the ones filling you with unwanted and unnecessary doubt. You want them gone, gone, gone. Nothing but Nel in their place. 

And you slip an, “I love you,” in between kisses for good measure. 

Jungkook could never understand. 

Nel kisses you back just as hard, dramatically slowing his thrusts, drawing out his high for as long as possible. 

“I love you too.”

Jungkook doesn’t know anything. 

Nel groans into your lips when it becomes too much and pulls out. 

Removing and tying off the condom, Nel goes to the washroom to throw it out and starts the shower he knows you’ll be joining him for when you're done. 

A routine you’re all too familiar with. 

One you created. 

He knows you need a few minutes to get yourself off. 

You’ve never been able to cum from sex with a partner. No matter how hard you tried. No matter what you did. 

Most would think Nel wasn’t a good lover or wasn’t trying enough, but it was through years of constantly trying anything and everything that you learned you just…couldn’t. 

No amount of fingering or oral or penetration from your partner could make you orgasm. 

So Nel knows to wait for you in the shower as you finish yourself off, your own fingers making quick work of it, because you always could for some reason. 

It isn’t your ideal situation, and it isn’t anyone’s fault. But it works. You both get the intimacy you crave and you accepted a long time ago that you were just one of the unlucky few. 

Screams fill Jungkook’s ears as a hand finds his hair and nails rake against his scalp. 

Adaline isn’t a quiet receiver. 

“Ohmygod!” She shouts for the twentieth time. “Yes! There…so goo-oohhhh,” the last syllable turning into a loud moan. 

He’s holding her downwith a forearm by her pelvis, mouth full as he brings out her third orgasm of the night, juices flooding his tongue. 

He’s working out earlier frustrations and proving a point to himself in this fucked up version of self therapy. 

He shouldn’t be. 

But he does.

Has to.

Seeing you today with Cornelius spurred feelings within him that he didn’t know he had. Sure, there were bits and pieces of something stirring he refused to name, but today? 

They were in a whole different ballpark. Different than anything else he’s ever felt before, brewing inside him, bubbling up to the surface even though he’s been trying his best to pop them and shove them down.

Anger? 

Feelings he doesn’t want to have. 

Jealousy? 

Does have. 

Wanting you to look at him the way you look at Nel?

Can’t have. 

Not for… 

He admits he provoked Nel because he could. Dick move, but it was because Jungkook knew just by looking at him that giving you any form of attention would piss him off.  He seemed the type. 

Overly possessive, overprotective. 

Overbearingly so. 

Suffocatingly so. 

Because Nel knows how lucky he is. That you chose him. That you still choose him. 

He knows he has to keep others away. 

Knows he isn’t good enough for you, holds you back. But keeps you anyway.

The selfish prick. 

So Jungkook eyed you up and down, leisurely, and for as long as he wanted. Purely out of the need to prove to himself he was right about his little assessment of your boyfriend. At least that’s what he told himself. 

Was it childish and unnecessary? 

Yes. 

But he was right. And that felt good. 

He could see in your posture and your hushed words you didn’t want Nel’s protection, didn’t need it, and that Nel ignored that wish of yours. Did what he wanted to instead of respecting your ability to make decisions for yourself. Bulldozed your opinions. 

It pissed Jungkook off. 

He’d left a little while after sending you that text to read, but you never did. At least not since the last time he checked. And so he’d made plans with Adaline the second he was out of your earshot. Calling her up and setting a time for what’s currently taking up his primary focus. 

Because even though it was Adaline underneath him, for the very first time, that’s not who he imagined it was. 

Not who he just dragged a fourth orgasm out of with his fingers because he could. 

Because he would. He would be so much better. Give so much more. If only… 

Fuck.

Jungkook stands and drags his cock over Adaline’s entrance, whacking it against her clit a couple times before running the tip through her folds and pushing in. He hisses at the feeling. At who he was sinking into in his head, splayed out in front of him. Skin glistening with sweat mixed with arousal. Mouth open, slack jawed in pleasure. 

Adaline moans loudly and it dissolves his visual. 

His tattooed hand moves to hold her hands above her head, the other silences her mouth. 

“Quiet now,” he whispers, low and deep. A bead of sweat dripping off his brow, hair sticking to his neck and temple.

He intends it to be sexy for her, but in reality, he’s just sick of hearing her. It’s ruining his mental image. Not that she’ll ever know that though. 

To Adaline, this session is all about her and making her feel good. 

But constant screams and loud, pornographic moans aren’t appealing to him in the slightest. They're taking him out of the mood. Making him soft. 

Once or twice when it’s genuine? Sure. But the constant assault she loves to give his eardrums? Not even a little bit.

He sets a fast, rough pace, and Adaline’s eyes roll back in pleasure, screams finally subsiding in white hot bliss, replaced by bitten lips and smothered whimpers.

He is going to prove this point to himself over and over again. All night if he has to. 

And he has to.  

To get whatever it is he’s feeling for you out of his system.

To keep his sanity. 

To forget. 

And while it’s Adaline’s name is on his lips when he cums. 

It’s not the name he repeats in his head like a prayer. 

Chapter Seven: Hard Goodbyes and Favourite Colours

A/N 2: Thanks for waiting for this chapter. I'll try my best to have 7 out as soon as I can get it. I promise.

A/N 3: As always, Thank you for reading, loves. Xoxo - Yoon <3

<- Back

[teliphone]

Limerence

Summary: Your relationship with Jaeyi is far from normal. It’s toxic, suffocating and obsessive. Students around you stay away from you to avoid trouble with Jaeyi. A new student enters which stirs things a little. Maybe she could be your escape? Or maybe it leads you to sink deeper into Jaeyi’s trap. 

Warning(s): Smut, Jealousy, Obessesion, Slapping, Chains, Fingering, Overstimulation

Word Count: 3.5k

-

Yoo Jaeyi and you walk down the halls next to each other… or rather you’re trying to keep up with her. Her hand tightly wraps around yours, pulling you to match speed with her. You let out a small grunt of pain at how hard she’s gripping. She stares forward, ignoring everyone. You spare one glance to the side. Students mumble with each other as they stare at you. They quickly look away when you make eye contact with them. It’s quite sad, you have soon realized. No one dared try to talk to you ever since you got into a relationship with her. All your friends have left you without any reason. You’re constantly stuck with Jaeyi and it's starting to drive you crazy. The only space she allows you is by letting you sit alone at your desk. She sits a few rows behind you, so she can watch every movement you make. 

Jaeyi drags you into her science lab. The little mice run around in their cages. It creeps you out. You never understood how she could easily test on those innocent mice. You pull back from her grip slightly. She narrows her eyes and finally turns around to look at you. You drop your shoulders in annoyance. You aggressively jerk your hands away before crossing your arms. 

“What are you doing?” You fum. She breaks into a smile as she straightens her back. 

“I want to spend time with you,” She chirps. You roll your eyes and let out a laugh of disbelief. 

“I’ve been with you all day. Can’t I just spend some time somewhere else?” You huff. She turns around and walks deeper into the lab. She opens one of the cages and picks up a small mouse. She completely ignored you. You can feel your frustration building up. You hate when she blatantly ignores you. 

“I am leaving,” You mumble before walking towards the door. You didn’t wait for her response. You knew she was going to find you anyway. No matter how far you try to hide and escape from her, she always seems to find a way to get you. It scares and baffles you. But what scares you the most is if she leaves you. She has removed everyone in your life… all you have left is her. You need her. You pause at the door handle.

“I’ll… text you,” You hesitate before exiting. Jaeyi secretly smirks as she lifts the mice to her face. 

“Cute,” She mumbles directing it to you.  

-

Class today is different. You stare at the new student, Seulgi, standing in front of the class. She looks innocent and lost. Your eyes scan down to see her fidgeting with the ends of her uniform. Your lips broke into a small smile. You wonder if she could survive in this toxic school. She makes eye contact with you and you smile at her—a small one with no further meaning. You didn’t pay much attention to her after that. Returning to working on your homework. Suddenly you feel a presence beside you. 

“...Can I sit here?” She softly asks. Her doe eyes are cute. The students in the room mumble against themselves. Your seat is usually empty. No one wanted to disturb your studying and gave you space. But truthfully it's because they don’t want to get in between you and Jaeyi. They fear what she could do to them. 

“Yes,” You finally answer. You didn’t care what Jaeyi would think. You've had enough of her controlling your life. You can hear a couple of students softly gasping and mumbling. Seulgi smiles and takes a seat. You stare at her a little bit before looking down at your textbook. Jaeyi quietly analyzes the scene before her. Her facade doesn’t break. In fact, she smiles. It gets her excited. She finds you cute for trying to break her rules and not knowing what it will cause you. 

-

It’s a few minutes after break and you walk back to class. You slide the doors of the classroom open to find it empty. You return earlier than the others. You make your way to your desk til a phone notification catches your attention. You scan the room to make sure you aren’t mistaken. You locate the noises coming from Jaeyi’s desk. You look around to make sure no one is around. Her phone buzzes against her desk a few more times. You couldn’t help but find it interesting that she would leave her phone. With curious eyes, you go to look at her texts. 

‘Please delete the video’

‘I apologized!’

‘I’ll do anything you want!’

Your eyes widen in confusion. What video is this person talking about that they desperately want Jaeyi to delete it? Is she blackmailing someone? Before your thoughts can continue, the door slides open. You quickly glance away from her phone. Jaeyi stands at the door staring back at you. There is an unreadable look on her face. She smiles, but her eyes are emotionless. You slightly gulp and avert your stare. You walk to your desk and act like you weren’t caught red-handed. Jaeyi slowly walks past you while staring at you. You feel your heart racing. She takes a seat on her desk and lifts her phone. Her eyes swiftly read the text messages. She glances up from her phone to stare at you with heavy-lidded eyes. 

She knows you saw it. 

She slides off her desk. You hear her footsteps coming closer from behind. You unconsciously straighten your back. Your awareness heightens. She places her hand on top of your shoulders and grips. Your breathing hicks. She leans her body down til her lips touch your ears.

“Don’t tell anyone,” She whispers softly. You secretly clench your fist underneath the desk. She smirks and tilts her head to look at your face. You quickly stand up to get away from her. Her presence is too suffocating. The sweet scent of her perfume is enough to make your brain numb. Your action causes her to widen her eyes and step backward. You tug the green uniform closer to your body before glaring at her. You fascinate her without even trying. From behind, you can hear the sounds of more students entering the room. They all freely talk amongst themselves happily.

“I don’t care what you do as long as it doesn’t involve me,” You speak in a low tone. Little did you know, it does involve you. Everything Jaeyi does involves you whether you like it or not. Her lips slowly turn into a small smirk. You didn’t wait for her response and turned your body around. Right at that moment, a student accidentally bumps into you. The drink in her hand falls onto the white of your shirt. You can feel the cold liquid seep into the cloth. She gasps and immediately starts apologizing. You are stunned for a moment before forcing a small smile. 

“It’s okay,”

“No no, I will pay for you,” She splutters. She starts running her hands over your shirt to try and clean it. Her face expresses such stress and embarrassment. Her movement causes the liquid to spread, making your shirt translucent. You softly grab onto her wrist to stop her. 

“I said it’s okay,” You repeat. She stops moving and stares at you with pitiful eyes. Her poor heart feels like it’s escaping her chest. She nervously looks over to see Jaeyi staring at her with a blank expression. You let go of her hand and start walking to the door. You expect Jaeyi to follow you, but she doesn’t. You secretly feel sad and disappointed about it. 

You enter the bathroom and slowly take off your uniform. This leaves you with just a bra on. You plop the white shirt into the sink and switch on the water. You quietly listen and watch the water drench your shirt. You tilt your head to look at the ceiling and let out a deep sigh. What a hassle. You didn’t have an extra pair of shirts meaning you would have to wear this wet shirt back to class. You reach down into the sink and start scrubbing the material. After a few minutes of scrubbing, you lift the shirt to examine it. Water drips at the edges. Good enough. You wring the shirt til it's somewhat dry and put it back on. The coldness makes you shiver. You just have to suffer through til the end of class. 

You take a seat, slightly shivering. The air feels so cold against the wetness of your shirt. It feels uncomfortable having to be in a class like this. You avoid the stares of other students as you take out your textbooks. Among the students, one is particularly more interested. Jaeyi can't stop staring at you as you try to pay attention to your homework. Her eyes slowly examine your back. She sees the wet damp on your back and tilts her head. The wetness has made your shirt slightly translucent. Your bra is so visible, it's almost humorous to her. She can’t help but think it’s like you want her to see it. She starts to smirk and shift against her seat. You’re so exposed, yet you don’t even realize it. You lean forward to straighten your back. Her eyes dilate at the full view of your back. She nibbles her bottom lip as she starts to fantasize about you, specifically your bra. 

She imagines herself running her fingers down your spine to tease you. She traps you between her body and your desk. You would blush so cutely as she leans her face close to yours. It drives her crazy how reactive you are. 

“Stop it,” You glare at her, slightly pushing against her shoulders. She pushes you to sit on your desk. She quickly slides her body between your legs. She smirks and brings her hands to the front of your wet white button-up. 

“Stop?” She hums as she starts to unbutton the first button. By the third button, she can see your bra peeking out. You shyly look away while biting your lips. She slowly finishes off the last button and quickly tugs your shirt aside to expose your front to her. Finally, after seeing your bra through the shirt, she can see it fully. The cold air touches your bare skin. Your cheeks start to burn bright red. Her eyelids become heavy with lust. She brings her hands up to cup your boobs. Her thumb harshly rubs against your nub. Your breathing hicks. You shut your eyes to save yourself from making more noise. Her two thumbs grind against your sensitive nub while groping the soft plush. She repeats the action over and over til your boobs start to become red from her touches. You tilt your head back and let out a soft moan. She smiles at your reaction and rewards you by kissing your neck. You try to clench your thighs together, but her waist stops you. Your lower stomach feels funny. Suddenly you couldn't handle her touch anymore. It’s making your brain turn into mush. You grip onto her wrist causing her to stop. She leans back and widens her eyes in surprise. Your breathing shakes as you glare up at her. Her eyes were black like the void, unreadable. 

“Do you want me to stop?” She asks softly. 

“...Yes,” You breathe out. You didn’t understand why you said yes. The feeling was too much… but it was also so good. She pauses, deep in thought before her eyes quickly shift. 

“Okay,” She simply responds. She removes herself from your body, leaving you breathless on your desk. Your front is still completely exposed. She smiles at the redness on your chest. As you try to collect your thoughts, you hear a camera click. You quickly glare up to see her snapping a picture on her phone. A picture of your touched boobs. She smiles brightly and slides her phone back into her pocket. 

Jaeyi clenches her thighs underneath her desk. She couldn’t believe that just imagining about you caused her to feel turned on. She grips her pencil and smiles. Laughing at herself for being so needy. It’s silly to her. She forces herself to look away from your innocent body and back to her textbooks. This little game you’re playing is just the beginning. 

Seulgi begins to notice how see-through your shirt is. Her eyes widen, and she swiftly takes off her jacket, gently placing it over you for cover. You turn to meet her gaze, and she offers a soft smile before shifting her focus back to her homework. With a smirk, you touch the hem of her jacket, hoping Jaeyi noticed the gesture. She surely did. Though her expression stays neutral, her grip on the pencil tightens, turning her knuckles pale. 

-

Jaeyi’s room is dark and cold as she slams you against her wall. She traps you between her hands. You grunt in pain at the impact. You could tell your shoulders are going to be bruised again. You glare up at her eyes in hatred. Her eyes dilate and you can see the pure jealousy in her eyes. Her tongue brushes the inside of her cheeks. Thoughts swirl inside her head. You couldn’t help but let out a laugh. She’s so jealous. So easy.

“You’re laughing?” Her voice low. You playfully move your eyes from her lips to her eyes while you poke her lower stomach. Your fingers slowly drag up to grip her collar. You tilt your head and lean closer to her face. Her eyebrows lift in amusement. 

“You don’t control me,” You whisper. Her eyes darken as she smirks. You shove her back and attempt to walk away. She quickly grabs your wrist and spins you around. You fight against her, but she is surprisingly strong. Her hands naturally wrap around the back of your neck, forcing you to look at her. Your eyes feel like sharp knives while hers look warm. 

“I’m going to prove to you I do,” She hisses. She presses her lips against yours softly. You try to move away, but the hand behind your neck locks you. Her tongue brushes against your closed mouth. Her fingers gently rub your neck. While she kisses you, she pushes you onto her bed. She quickly grabs your hands and pins them above your head. Her knee secretly slots between your legs causing you to moan. With your mouth open, she can deepen the kiss. 

“Kiss me,” She begs. You try to squeeze your legs together, but her legs block you. You jerk your body, trying to get away from the source. You can feel yourself getting turned on. She leans away from the kiss in frustration. Her eyes are lidded and lustful. Your chest moves up and down fast. She dips her mouth down to your neck to lick and suck. You accidentally let out a soft moan. She smiles and bites down on your skin. She pulls away again to look at your eyes. 

“Your moans are sweet,” She hums. Her voice is so soft and seductive. You feel your heart skip a beat. 

“Fuck you,” You cuss, feeling your cheeks turn red. She smiles and dips down to your ears. Her breathing tickles you. 

“Stop fighting me,” She mumbles. She sticks out her tongue and licks the outer shell of your ears. You twitch against her body, squeezing your eyes shut. She knew every spot to get you hotter. With a quick movement, she unclasps three buttons from your shirt to reveal your bra. She licks her lips and squeezes her legs together. She’s been turned on since earlier. 

“You teased me all day,” She whispers. She lets go of your wrists and places both hands on your boobs. You lay submissively, not trying to move away and she smiles. She starts pressing her fingers into the softness of your chest. Her eyes glued onto them like she’s addicted. Your nipple hardens and exposes themselves on the surface of the bra. Her eyes flicker up to watch your reaction as she brushes her thumbs against them. Your head tilts back a little and hum a soft moan. Her tongue drags down to the middle of your chest. Her hand continues to squeeze your boobs aggressively. You bring your hands down to her lower neck. You gently gesture her head to look back up. 

“Kiss me,” You blush. She lets out a giggle and moves her body up to capture your lips again. You feverishly move your lips against hers. Her lips feel so soft and plump. You feel like you're floating. She tilts her head, bumping her nose against yours. She keeps the pace to match your needy ones. Her brain turns into a mess when you slightly bite her bottom. She pulls away from the kiss, her chest moving up and down. Her fingers move to unclasp the rest of your buttons. She helps you get out of your green school uniform. She starts taking off hers as well but leaves on her black bra and panties. 

You bring a hand up to cover your red cheeks. You feel embarrassed being the only fully naked one. It makes you feel so vulnerable before her. Just how she wanted. She wants to show how much power she has over you. She moves to the side to grab something out of her bed drawers. Your heart starts to hammer against your chest when you realize what she’s holding. There between her hands is a small silver collar with a small chain. She returns between your thighs and gestures for you to sit up. You obey and she clasps the collar around your neck. She tugs the chains for fun causing you to jerk forward. She pecks your lips. 

“Turn around,” She smiles. Your response is too slow making her tug the chains again. You grunt and it clicks into your head to start moving. You turn your body til you're on all fours, your bottom facing her. You gulp nervously because you can no longer see her. Suddenly you feel a hard slap on your bottom causing you to cry out. Her eyes darken and she smiles sinisterly. 

“You know you’re not supposed to talk to anyone but me right?” She reminds you before slapping again. You bite your lower lip to stop yourself from crying out. 

“I am just protecting you,” She whispers. She tugs the chains harshly making your head tilt back. You choke against the collar, tears starting to form. 

“Say you’re sorry,” She demands. She slaps you again and smiles when she sees your ass turning red. 

“S-sorry!” You cry. She places her cold hands gently against your bruised bottom. She rubs them a little then runs her fingers down to your slit. She rubs your core and chuckles. You’re shamefully wet. It’s like she didn’t have to do much for you to turn into a dirty mess for her. She rubs your juice around your clit. You moan and jerk your body. She continues to circle your clit til she can feel your juices spilling from your core. 

“Please,” You beg, jerking your hips to chase her fingers. She smirks and tilts her head. 

“Yes?” She purrs. 

“...Please put it in,” You blush. 

“Anything for you,” She hums before shoving two fingers into your core. You gasp at the sudden feeling of getting full. You squeeze your eyes shut and grip onto the bed sheets. Your eyebrows furrow in pleasure. She moves her fingers in and out slowly, watching closely at how your hips jerk against her. She feels more turned on and bites her lips. She lets you ride her fingers for a moment. Listening closely to your quiet moans. But you’re moaning too quietly for her. She tugs the chains hard causing you to tilt your head back. It chokes you. She starts moving her hands fast, abusing your walls. You cry out loudly. 

“You react so well,” She mumbles to herself. The sounds of your wet core against her fingers become embarrassingly loud. You moan so sweetly it sounds like a melody in her ears. 

“I’m going to come,” You choke. She moves her fingers faster and tugs the chains harder. You feel so sinister in this position. It makes you roll your eyes back and moan. Her two fingers slide easily against your wet gummy walls. After a few more strong thrusts, you come onto her fingers. You let out a loud high pitch moan. Your silk runs down her knuckles and she chuckles. She lets go of the chain and slows down her movement to let you catch your breath. She pulls out her wet fingers and rubs your clit. Your body shakes and jerks from overstimulation. Just when you thought it was over, you felt her fingers thrust into your core again. 

“I am going to make you come over and over til you turn dumb,” She snickers, slamming her fingers knuckles deep. You cry out and jerk your body away from her, but the chains limit you from moving away. You claw at the collar, but find it useless as your body bounces at each of her thrusts.

“I want to numb your mind til all you think about is me.” 

[bears-sillybasement]

ohoho! soo uhmm BIG POST Y'ALL. I guess I'll pin this so everyone gets a basic idea of my oc?..I LOOOOVE explaining everything I have of him so far..SO AM AM AM AM I HOPE YOU ALL ENJOY IT??? MAYBE???

This is Bernadette!

(with and without his half-hood!)

Although Bernadette is a mostly feminine name, He chose the name himself after losing most of his childhood memories in a traumatic event.

"Bernadette" was the only word he remembered when he regained consciousness, so now he uses it for himself.

It's the only little thing from his past that he remembers with inexplicable affection.

About the hood..

This hood in the middle of his face is impossible to remove! This is because of a curse he received when putting it on.

Why? Well, it's a stolen hood. Most of the things Bernadette wears are stolen from ancient temples. All of them have an effect on him, but sadly for his desires none of them manages to actually kill him.

the facecards i made at 5am lol

It's actually weird to draw him looking straight ahead because he usually avoids looking at others, but I still made a version that way!

(I definitely didn't try very hard)

Basic (and unnecessary) information :3

Part of his design looks childish because he's a storyteller focused on children, his job is to look after and entertain most of them while their parents are busy!

Although he looks like someone chaotic or eccentric, actually has a love-hate relationship with attention. It's "fun" when others see him, but not for too long.

He likes people, as long as they don't get into his personal life. It's the same reason of why he has very, very few friends. He is very reserved with his stuff, in general. With everything.

For reasons he doesn't mention, he feels uncomfortable around small animals. He's afraid of hurting them.

he LOVES meat. except pork, he thinks it tastes like shit

Ironically, since he lives in Fontaine, he absolutely hates tea and calls it "just dirty water" (you all have the right to kill him)

but absolutely loves latte. extra sweet.

He was NOT BORN in Fontaine. His origins are something he doesn't like to talk about and barely remembers, but he lived his teenager days in the Sumeru desert

he's 20 years old now! (I should have put this sooner but I'm too lazy to fix it now lol)

Signature weapon

another stolen thing! haha, ha..never remind him of his half criminal days...

Even though its main function is as an axe, the tongue that sticks out of it is sticky..and can stretch out to help him move around, grab things (or others...)

Skills!

Right here it's my duty to thank all the mutuals who offered their OCs (blindly) for this!

I hope they like it :3

@cheeomi (thanks for ur oc!)

(Bernadette often lies to children saying that he eats the souls of those who the bear swallowed... he just likes to be dramatic.)

Something that needs to be made clear is that the bear is NOT ALIVE. It's an empty real skin coat, but a spirit lives inside.

One he knows very well..

inside the bear there's just a very strange emptiness, you're just trapped inside floating in a warm space. (so kohaku is fine, yei)

Although if you're an exorcist or someone sensitive to paranormal things, it may be a bit akward..

@scarameownya (thanks for ur oc!)

magic cape!!!!! another stolen thing!!!!

...But hey, if nobody caught you then it's yours, right?

This cape is quite peculiar, it can take you anywhere you want! real or not. although if you enter on your own it can take you to places in your mind that you don't want to see..

That's why you should not enter without permission or company!! Always ask its great, cool AND pretty owner!

Bernadette just uses it to move around places quickly. (Or hiding)

@chenyuvale (thanks for ur oc!)

Taking away the normal function of an axe, as I said, the tongue does its own thing! you can use it to move BUT it also can be used to leave people trapped.

For some reason the tongue drools..it's pretty gross when it gets stuck to the walls of the fontaine buildings!

But well um, Bernadette it's not going to clean that up.

@sylviegirly (thanks for ur oc!)

another way to get around! As you will notice, he doesn't usually walk much using his own feet..

Since what's inside the bear is a spirit, his ways of taking over the body are actually quite varied, and Bernadette uses them to his advantage...With his permission, of course!! (Just sometimes)

.

.

.

OOOFFF OKAY THAT'S ALL! for now..I hope it wasn't too much, I always wanted to do this kind of thing TvT It's not THAT bad

I'm SUPER sure I just typed something horribly wrong but...I really want to..sleep..haha..ha..

[shawsimmer]

hi! do you have any tips on how to make teenagers look like actual teenagers? venus looks so good!

hi!! so i don't use the preteen mod, but i do use the shortest height preset from this set by luumiasims. so far there really isn't a huge animation issue because her friends are using the same preset and other animations with adults/kids (like hugging) don't look that bad. however, i'm noticing that there are some clipping issues when trying to pose her, though. i hate how teens are the same height as adults and i really wanted to play out the preteen/early teen life stage with the girls. other than the height preset, i think i just made her eyes bigger and cheeks fuller. i think adding blush and braces also make her look younger. i try to use hairstyles and accessories that look "younger", but tbh i'm having a hard time finding clothes for her atm. here's a photo to show what the shortest height preset looks like standing next to an adult and a child. i hope this was helpful!

more asks under the cut!!

byeee this is so funny. i forget i never really posted the beginning parts of this save so not many know the lore of these three. oh god, i'm gonna yap for a bit. short story of their relationship is eva & kato got together in their early 20s and were going to have a son named saturn, but sadly eva had pregnancy complications and they lost the baby. unfortunately, it made things really difficult in their relationship and they decided to break up. during their time apart, eva meets judah and falls in love, but she ends up cheating on him multiple times with kato (even the night before she got married to judah ) and they literally wouldn't stay away from each other. years later after both girls were born, she confesses to judah and they take time apart. i know what you are probably thinking, how tf does this end in the big happy family we have now? eva basically made it known that kato is her soulmate and she could never really be done with him. they would have never broken up if not for the loss of their son, but she was also so in love with judah and the family they had created together. she proposed the throuple idea (lmao the audacity) and both kato and judah were veryyyy hesitant, but ultimately, they both loved her so much that they decided being with her was worth it. at first, they decided to just move in together and kept their relationships with eva separate. ngl it was such a weird and tense time in my game and they would constantly get jealous/upset with each other. i ended up using a mod allowing more than one partner and things settled down. after some time living together the guys realized they actually fw each other and they were lowkey bestiess. they have been together #challengers style a few times, but they usually tend to be romantic with eva separately. i know it's a weird situation, but now i'm happy with how things turned out. no one holds any ill feelings towards each other and all three of them just really enjoy doing life together and parenting the girls the best they can. there's soo much more to it, but i tried to keep it as short as i could lol.

totally!! you don't have to credit me, but i would like to seee

hmm i'm not really sure. i normally label my sims as maxis-mix. maybe more alpha? i think i prefer alpha skin details and clothes over mm. my build/buy cc is a good mix. it's nice not having to force myself into one style

ty :)) i don't really play legacy challenges. having rules sometimes ruins the gameplay for me, though i do think they are super useful when it comes to using/playing with certain features of packs that i wouldn't mess with otherwise. i tried nsb 2.0, but i'm still on gen one lmao. sorry i don't really have any to recommend.

hi!! it's actually really easy if you have sims4studio and a photo editing software. i use photoshop. first i find either a painting or photo frame that i like, then i export the diffuse map in s4s. i take the png file and basically paste my photos on top of whatever was in the frame (in photoshop) and then i import it back into s4s & save. if you want an in-depth tutorial i could definitely make one, but there are also a lot of great ones here on tumblr and youtube.

had to ask my bf about this lol. i have 0 idea what any of this means:

cpu: amd ryzen 5 3600, ram: 16gb ddr4, gpu: rtx 3060, 1tb m.2 nvme ssd (x2), motherboard: asus prime b550-plus, 650w power supply

i think i've had this account since 2018, but i didn't start to really use it until around 2022. i was suuuuper involved in the simsta community at the time. i was always kind of intimidated by tumblr (and the people here) and didn't really know how to use it. now that just seems funny.

well, first i think i should mention that i absolutely do get bored and experience burn out. sometimes i don't touch the game for months. i feel like this is common and i know a lot of my friends experience it too, so don't feel bad about it.

not sure how great my cas advice is considering i feel like i make the same sim over and over, but one thing that helps me keep things fresh is using cc, presets, and aesthetics that i don't normally use. i find myself using the same skin details a lot and things can get boring. use that hair that you never touch, try out different aesthetics, mix and match different skin details together, utilize different sliders, pick a fun hair color, try different makeup styles!

when it comes to keeping gameplay interesting, my advice is to try not to micromanage everything. i knowww it can be difficult, especially if you have a certain storyline in your head, but i feel like if you control every little thing, it's easy to lose steam and things can get boring or unenjoyable fast. it's really fun to let your sims tell their own story and it keeps you guessing what will happen next, especially when they decide to do things you wouldn't normally choose for them. for example, when eva had her pregnancy complications it took everything in me not to cheat it away, but some of my sims wouldn't even have been born had i not let things play out. another example is when she decided to be unfaithful. it's not something i'd normally want my sims to do, but it created a whole different story that has been so interesting to play. also let your sims have flaws! not everyone is a saint. let them be mean, let them fail, and let them develop their own personalities as you play. i pay attention to their whims and choose to do the things they want. when my sims age up, i like to use the randomizer on their traits and pretend it's fate. now this isn't to say i don't have some storylines or things that i'd like them to do planned out, i just wouldn't recommend planning their entire life out all at once, you know? but this is what keeps things interesting for me, it may not be for everyone :)

as for the right time to take screenshots, it depends on your personal preference and what you want photographed. i personally take screenshots of my sims doing everything so much that i feel like a proud parent. every once in a while, i go through my screenshot folder from the beginning of my save and watch everything back like a movie :'). when it comes to actually posing my sims for a screenshot, i like to keep it to a minimum because setting everything up can sometimes take me out of gameplay mode lol. i really only pose them when i want to take photos to decorate their home or if there's a pose i really want to use to tell a story.

hi!! this is so nice :')) thank you!

i don't really have anything specific when it comes to posting on tumblr, other than using hashtags that help others see your posts. i don't care about numbers or anything like that. i post whenever i want, sometimes multiple times a day and sometimes once a month. i feel like as long as you are posting what you love, the right audience/community will find you. definitely interact with people in the community! there's so many creative people here that inspire me all the time. if you have specific questions about how to put sims up for download (like exporting their files) or anything like that, feel free to dm me! i'm happy to help. :)

ooo okay, so presets help a ton. northernsiberiawinds has some head presets and i use #8 all the time and it gives the head a narrower shape. here is a gif showing how i use sliders to pull the face down because i honestly don't know how to explain it in words and figured a visual would be of more help anyway. hope this helps! <3

[vintageshanny]

Zippers and Kisses

This is just a flirty fantasy I’ve created in my mind after reading the story behind these pictures in Shirley Connell’s book.

Content: Elvis being the marvelously complex person that he was - confident, insecure, sweet, funny, etc. PG13 I think?

October 1976

“See? I told you that it was him!” Trudy exclaimed triumphantly as she whipped her car into the gas station parking lot. “I’d recognize that sexy bod anywhere,” she added with a giggle.

“Me too,” Effie whispered, almost to herself, her heart pounding out of her chest as she watched Elvis climb off his motorcycle and saunter into the building. “Don’t let Jim hear you say that, though,” she warned her friend.

Trudy rolled her eyes at the mention of her husband’s jealousy of Elvis. “Yeah, I guess you’ll have to do all the flirting tonight.”

“I’ll be lucky if I can remember my name,” Effie murmured as she got out of the car, somehow propelling herself forward as if she wasn’t about to have the most surreal experience of her life.

As they approached the building, Elvis came walking back out with two of his guys following close behind.

“Hey Trudy honey, how’ve ya been?” Elvis asked, nodding at her and Effie.

Trudy could never fully grasp that Elvis knew her name, even after years of hanging out by the gate and talking to him whenever she got the chance.

“Good, Elvis, it’s so nice to see you. This is my friend Effie, she’s visiting Memphis for a few weeks and really wanted to meet you.”

Elvis looked over intrigued as Trudy discreetly backed away and started a conversation with the guys. She knew Effie really wanted to talk to Elvis alone, but that was never easy these days.

“Ya really wanted ta meet me?” he asked, sounding oddly flattered, as if there were not millions of women dying to meet him.

“Of course. I mean, I’m such a big fan of yours. I have all of your records,” Effie rambled nervously, sounding like a starstruck teenager instead of the 29-year-old woman she was. Elvis looked amused as she continued on. “I’m sorry, I’m so nervous. I, um, I just think you’re so special.”

Elvis’ smile widened noticeably at that. “Aw honey, ain’t no need ta be nervous around little old me. I’m just a regular guy.”

“A regular guy out for a midnight motorcycle ride with an entourage and a pack of groupies following.” Effie laughed, finally letting herself relax.

“Exactly. Oh, did ya wanna see my badge?” Elvis suddenly asked excitedly, unzipping his jacket to show off the badge on his belt.

“Oh wow, it’s sparkly!” Effie exclaimed as she leaned down to get a closer look.

“I had some diamonds added to it,” Elvis explained proudly, looking down with a smile as she studied the badge. He tilted it a little bit so she could see the diamonds better. He saw her eyes trail to the rings on his fingers and then to something else below his belt.

Effie’s eyes widened as she noticed a little glinting piece of metal that was not in its proper position. She blushed as she thought how easy it would be to reach her hand into that opening in the fabric and touch the bulge that was nestled there. She blushed even harder when she looked up and saw Elvis staring down with a little crooked smirk on his face.

“Honey, somehow I don’t think you’re lookin’ at the badge anymore. Somethin’ else caught your eye?” he teased, his tongue slipping out to lick his lips.

“Yes, I mean it’s just that...” Effie leaned in close to him and lowered her voice. “It’s just that your zipper is down,” she whispered.

“It is?” Now it was Elvis’ turn to blush as he reached down and yanked the zipper up hurriedly. He tried to pull the zipper up on his jacket as well, feeling suddenly much too exposed. He should’ve just stayed home tonight.

Effie watched as Elvis fumbled with the zipper on his jacket, his cheeks turning pinker by the second. He’s embarrassed and self-conscious, she thought to herself, her heart melting at the realization.

She put her hands on his and gently instructed, “Let me help you.” She carefully lined up the zipper and pulled it halfway up, noticing with delight how the jacket pulled tautly across his soft middle.

“Thank ya, honey,” Elvis mumbled, feeling like a fool.

How to get back to that flirty banter? Effie wondered. Time to be bold. “Y’know, I would’ve helped you with your other zipper too.”

There was that beautiful lopsided grin again. “Is that right, honey?”

“Yes, look how good I am at making sure the teeth are all lined up right.” She trailed her finger down the zipper of his jacket, letting her hand rest on his stomach.

“Oh baby, I don’t think I want ya usin’ any teeth down there at all,” Elvis laughed.

Effie’s face turned red, but Elvis’ loud uninhibited laugh was contagious, and she couldn’t stop herself from giggling.

“You didn’t have to come out here with your zipper down to get my attention, I would’ve been looking anyway,” she teased.

Elvis grinned and looked away, shaking his head a little as he blushed again. “You’re really somethin’, honey, y’know that?”

“I mean it, Elvis. You look so good. So good,” she repeated

“Tryin ta butter me up, huh? That must mean ya want somethin’. What can I do for ya baby?”

Effie felt her body go into some sort of sensory overload as Elvis grabbed her by the waist and pulled her in close to him, still smiling as his fingertips caressed her lower back.

“Well,” she squeaked out. “As long as you’re offering, I would love a kiss.”

“A kiss?” Elvis repeated, leaning in closer, relishing the feeling of a woman’s soft body reacting to his touch.

Effie nodded, unable to form words any longer as Elvis’ lips moved closer, slightly parted. His breath was warm and sweet against her own as his plush mouth finally landed on hers. She felt a soft flick of his tongue against her lips before he pulled back, the expression on his face as blissful as she felt.

“How was that honey?” he asked, his eyes searching her face for reassurance that he still had something special to offer.

“My whole body is tingling,” Effie whispered, her judgment clouded from her state of euphoria.

“Mine too,” Elvis chuckled. “I might have some more zipper problems soon.”

“Well you know who to call for help.” Effie smiled up at him as he gave her another tight squeeze before turning to get his helmet from one of his guys.

“I hope I see ya around again, honey. Don’t forget about me.”

“Well?” Trudy demanded as they got back to the car. “I gave you some time alone with him. Was it everything you’ve dreamed of?”

“He was so sweet and vulnerable and human.” Effie leaned back in her seat, still in a daze. “I think I can die happy,” she whispered.

[lupusbaby]

Let me tell you my secret:

When I first got sick, I spent a year trying to fight against my body and keep up with everyone else. I forced myself through nursing school until my first 9-hour clinical rotation came around and I literally could not use my legs that long. I tried so. hard. I was sick every single day, and used all my energy to keep up. There was no room left for enjoyable things like hobbies.

When I decided not to return to school, I also decided to stop trying to live like I’m able-bodied. I’m not able-bodied. There was always this feeling I wasn’t disabled enough to deserve aids, but I decided to fight against that feeling and slooooow down. I scheduled a wheelchair fitting, applied for disability, and found some accessible hobbies. I use what little energy I have to make art or do household tasks. I don’t run myself into body-failure anymore (I’m not perfect but I really try).

Through this I’ve realized that it’s not about loving yourself or loving your disability. It’s about making loving choices towards yourself and others. You don’t have to like it, you don’t have to feel like you deserve it.

It’s a loving choice to schedule your appointments and take your medications. It’s a loving choice to reduce your schedule. It’s a loving choice to buy the mobility aid, or delete Facebook, or eat a healthy meal. It’s a loving choice to pause or say goodbye to a past dream. It’s a loving choice to build yourself an accessible life.

There’s almost always a way to make the same choice unloving. You can diet because you hate your body and want to be skinny, or you can make a nutritious meal because your body will thank you for it. I like to imagine if I would encourage a friend in my situation to make my same choice.

I recognize that not everyone has the exact privileges I do. But making a choice simply because it is an act of self-love is enough. To me, that is coexisting with my illness. My illness hasn’t changed, but my perspective has. I still live in sickness and pain. But I also spend my energy with intention and choose love.

[skzhua]

episode 3.

MASTERLIST

pairing: XO, Kitty's Min Ho x Female Reader

genre: Fluff, angst, exes-to-lovers, slow burn, coming-of-age.

word count: 5.3k (not proofread yet!)

warnings: cussing, jealousy, heist (aka don't do that kids).

summary: despite you and min ho growing closer once again, he still sends you mixed signals about what he wants. and you don't know how long you can handle this back and forth. especially when you know you'll be spending seollal with him... and stella.

note: Bold - Korean, Italic - Over the phone

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As soon as you saw Stella, you pushed Min Ho away from you. She was beyond mad, she was hurt. Before you could say anything, she shook her head in disappointment and left as she disappeared into the school building. You looked at Min Ho, who was avoiding your eyes.

"You didn't tell her you weren't interested, did you?"

With a sigh, he shook his head no. "I didn't get to speak to her, let's say."

"A text, Min Ho, no?" you said in disbelief.

"The one I was really trying to text was not responding."

"Yeah, and you should have taken it as a sign maybe."

His Adam's apple bopped. "Then why did you kiss me?"

You pointed at him. "You're the one who kissed me."

"What? Why would I want to kiss you?"

It felt like a knife went through your heart. You were baffled that, only seconds ago, you were letting yourself fall in love with him again. Although he was noticeably frustrated with you, it wasn't hard to see he regretted what he said right after the words left his mouth.

"Sorry, it just-"

"Whatever, Min Ho..."

Crossing your arms, you held them close to your body. To this, he took his jacket off and wrapped it around you. Your face still showed anger but you did nothing to stop him.

"I'll talk to Stella," he assured.

"Yeah, and I will too. I'll say this was in the spur of the moment."

He scoffed. "So, it meant nothing?"

Your shoulders dropped. "What do you want me to say?"

His mouth opened to say something but nothing came out. Visibly, he was as confused as you were. And while you didn't hate it, you were afraid you only hurt yourself.

"Sure," he finally spoke. "It was in the spur of the moment."

The corner of your mouth lifted the slightest, a sign of gratitude. "Thanks. We're good?"

"We're good."

You shared a hug that you could describe as the most awkward physical interaction you'd had in life, and you went your separate ways, not forgetting to give back his jacket beforehand. By then, hunger had died down and the softness of your mattress was all you could think of. You dreaded the discussion you'd have to share with Stella, but you couldn't just stop yourself from going home.

When you walked in, she was on her laptop and sat on the couch. At the sound of you entering the place, she glared at you before focusing on the screen again. You slowly approached her.

"Hey, can we talk?"

She frowned. "About how you promised nothing was going on with Min Ho before giving me his number, only to kiss him right in front of me?"

Ouch. As much as you hated hearing that, you couldn't deny that she was pretty spot on.

"It's not what it looks like-"

She suddenly shut the laptop before looking at you right in the eyes. "Did you do it to humiliate me or something?"

"What? Of course not!"

"Then explain to me what is going on," she breathed out, her voice softening.

You allowed yourself to take a seat next to her. "Min Ho and I, we have a complicated relationship. I am trying my best to become his friend again, no feelings involved. What you saw earlier was nothing but a moment of weakness where we both fell back into old feelings. I swear, it was nothing."

She cocked her head to the side. "It seemed pretty passionate to me."

"I promise, it meant nothing. Have him all you want, I won't overstep again."

Even if you were more trying to convince yourself than her, she ended up accepting your explanation, thanking you for being honest with her. But were you?

You hurried to join Dae and Kitty as soon as you saw them in the crowd. Q had been showering the whole gang with messages about how the track meet was important to him, meaning he wanted everyone to be there for him. Your only surprise was to not see his face among the team, who was already settled for the track to start. Out of breath, you joined your two friends who seemed as lost as you were.

"This is crazy. Where is Q?" Dae spoke what everyone was thinking.

"I have no idea, but that is the guy he was all over last night at the club," Kitty pointed to one of the track members.

Dae scoffed. "Q ditched me for Jin? But he's Q's rival, and he's a big jerk."

"Yeah, well, looks like Q might have gotten played," you sighed before turning to take a look around in hopes to spot Q.

That when you saw Min Ho and Stella, seated in a very cozy manner on the bleachers. While Stella waved at you kindly, Min Ho stared at the floor, visibly ashamed you 'caught' him hanging out with the person he was supposedly not interested in — also considering he kissed you the day prior. You were not going to let it affect you. Like you had both established, it meant nothing.

Alex coming out to announce start of the race was enough to make you forget about that weird feeling in your stomach. "Runners, please take your marks for the 100-meter dash qualifying. The winner will represent KISS-"

"We have to do something!" Kitty exclaimed.

You nodded. "I have an idea."

Before either could question you, you ran to the track. You purposefully dropped your bracelet, one that belonged to your mother, and began to act distressed as you looked around the ground. You didn't hesitate to let out grunts of frustration and comments on your foolishness for losing your jewelry.

The crowd began to chatter amongst themselves, wondering why you were interrupting the race. Kitty and Dae were trying to tell you with hand movements to stop, but you couldn't let Alex start the run when Q wasn't here.

"Y/N, get off the track!" Alex called out.

Out of panic — well mostly because you ran out of ideas — you dropped on the ground, faking to have fainted. Frankly, the ground was quite comfortable as you closed your eyes, only feeling the wind grazing against your skin... and fingers?

"Y/N!" Min Ho yelled, worried. "Y/N, you all right?"

As he rubbed your shoulder, shaking it slightly to see if you were fine, you opened an eye to glare at him. "I'm trying to cause a diversion, dummy!"

His shoulders relaxed, but he couldn't help but roll his eyes. He held his hand out for you to grab, and by hearing Q finally arriving, you took it. Helping you up, he could only chuckle.

"What?"

"That's the last thing I'd have expected you to do. I mean, since when do you like being the center of attention."

It was your turn to roll your eyes. "I don't. But I care about Q, who should be both our focus right now."

You didn't let him reply as you joined your friends — and Stella, to cheer on Q. As soon as the race started, your eyes were fixated on him. He started out great, being the first up. However, it didn't take long for Jin to surpass him.

"Come on, Q," you muttered to yourself.

"Let's go!" Kitty encouraged.

Unfortunately, the cheers you heard were all for Jin who made it first. You still all clapped, although you were visibly disappointed.

"Have I been mean to Juliana?"

You groaned, throwing your book at the end of your bed. All you wanted was one morning without Kitty complaining about ruining Yuri and Juliana living together by letting it slip out in front of Principal Lee. So far, so good since you were the one to take Yuri's bed in their room. That worked out for you since you wanted to avoid Stella. Yeah, because Min Ho clearly did not turn her down and they continued to be 'a thing'.

"What did you do, now?"

"Nothing!" she almost yelled, making you jump. "She was eating her cereal, then I tried to confide to her about Praveena, but she just left. She said she had stuff to do but I think she's making up excuses. Did I say something?"

"Beside the fact you were the cause for Yuri to move out?"

She deadpanned at you. "Yes, beside that."

You shrugged. "She might actually have something to do."

She whined. "You're not helping."

"Forget about them," you said, getting off your bed and grabbing your school bag. "We have to get to the assembly anyway."

Min Ho: Y/N?

"Uh..." you stopped on your tracks.

"Everything alright?" Kitry questioned, trying to catch a glimpse of your phone screen.

"Yeah, you go ahead. I'll join you at the assembly."

She seemed unsure but nodded nonetheless before leaving you alone. You looked in her room to see if Stella was still home, and when you noticed no signs of her, you dialed Min Ho's number.

He picked up right away. "I thought you'd ignore me!"

"What do you want?" you cut right to the chase.

"I was just grabbing coffee before class. Since we don't live in the same dorm anymore, I just wanted to know if you wanted one."

You scoffed. "What about your girlfriend? What is she going to say when she learns you're getting your ex coffee?"

"Hey, we're still friends, no? And Stella's not my girlfriend."

You hesitated. But, coffee is coffee after all. "Alright. You know how I like it?"

"How can I forget?"

You could hear the smile from his voice and, ultimately, it made you smile too. "I'll join you in a bit, then?"

"Just hurry before it gets cold."

And so, you took off, not forgetting to grab your umbrella in the process since it was raining lightly. It took you less than five minutes from your dorm to the coffee trailer. Min Ho, in all of his glory, stood patiently next to it with two cups in hands and his hair slightly damped since he put his umbrella away until you arrived. He was rocking his body back and forth, visibly waiting.

"You could have gotten me a large," you commented, grabbing his attention.

He chuckled. "For you, m'lady," he held the coffee to you.

You grabbed it, glad to see it was still warm. "Thanks."

He opened his umbrella again and you walked side by side towards the school building. Taking a sip, you were more than happy to get warmed up. Plus, it was just how you liked it.

"The ones you make are still better," you pointed out.

"I know," he cocked an eyebrow. "I hate to say this but it is different without you at the dorms."

"Don't get all nostalgic, it doesn't suit you."

He sipped his coffee before shrugging. "It's a fact, though. I have nobody to bicker with."

Your eyes grew, offended, and just when you were about to give him a slight slap on the arm, you were quickly interrupted by his father.

"So, how's my favourite student doing?" Mr. Moon asked, only for Min Ho to react disgusted.

"A bit early for blatant nepotism, dad."

"I was talking to your girlfriend, the shark," he pointed towards you and you body stiffened.

"Sorry about that... again. And we're not-"

He cut you off. "It's okay, I loved it," he complimented before turning to his son. "So, have you decided about the cabin for the long weekend?" Noticing Min Ho only seemed confused, he continued. "Just you and me, one-on-one on the slopes? You used to love when I took you skiing as a kid."

"That was Joon Ho. Not me. Anyways, Stella and I have plans this weekend."

"Oh I thought-" Mr. Moon started, glancing at you for a second. "Nevermind. Well, it would be a shame to let this house go to waste, again," he said before leaving the two of you be.

"Y/N-" Min Ho started, obviously wanting to explain the Stella thing.

But you ignored it. "Your dad's not doing a Seollal get-together with the whole family?"

He sighed, upset by your avoidance but he still answered. "All my siblings are spending the holidays with their moms. Joon Ho is on tour, meaning I'm his last resort."

"I mean, he is still putting in the effort of asking you. Who knows, maybe it's a chance for you to-"

"Torture myself?" he interrupted you. "Forget it. We have an assembly to go to before class."

The assembly in itself was not so interesting, as per usual. Stella joined Min Ho, to begin with, which did not please you much. Especially seeing her hold Min Ho's arm the way you used to. Otherwise, Alex was trying his best to catch the students' interest, which was pretty sad to watch. Madison was being the Korean obsessed girl that she is. And Mr. Moon had to steal the show. He announced a student talent showcase at the end of the semester where the winner would receive a cash prize. At the mention of it, you immediately looked at Dae.

And by the end of the assembly, your friends seemed to have the same thought as they encouraged Dae to sign up for it, while Kitty and Stella followed behind the four of you, having a conversation of their own.

"You have to enter the contest," Q said excitedly. "You have the voice of an angel."

Dae nodded. "My family could use the money. But singing is just, like, my hobby."

"I got you, bro. I'll coach you. Manager-performer dream team, baby," Min Ho offered. "And, I won't even take commission."

Dae chuckled, remaining doubtful. "But do you think I could actually win?"

"Yeah," you and Q affirmed.

That visibly encouraged him. "Okay, then. Let's do it."

Arriving at the dance studio, you came to fetch Dae after he texted you. Apparently, Min Ho and Eunice were making his first rehearsal hell and knowing you, he hoped you could get him out of it. As you walked in, you were less than surprised to see Stella tagging along as she observed Dae dancing messily. You chuckled to yourself, leaning on the door frame to not disturb them. You wanted to see Dae suffer a bit, it was kind of funny.

"This isn't going to work," he let out, discouraged.

Eunice scoffed. "It is not my fault that you can't handle a little constructive criticism."

Stella sighed. "Okay, why don't you tell them your brilliant idea?" she asked Min Ho, not forgetting to touch his arm in the process.

You swallowed whatever feeling you were having as Min Ho spoke. "Well, I thought of the cherry on top for your performance. When the song ends, you spin around, bend her back, and lay one on her."

Dae frowned. "What do you mean, 'lay one on her'?"

"What I mean is..."

You wanted a show, you got a show. Spinning Stella around, Min Ho swiftly held her before bending her back, just like he had described. And he laid one on her. Their lips met briefly but the small gesture was enough to make your eyes water. What hurt even more was Stella's satisfied grin, like she had won something. Maybe she did.

"My boy's right."

You jumped at the voice while Mr. Moon walked in the room past you. Finally, Min Ho spotted you. You couldn't tell what his face was saying, but it was nothing good. It was a mix of shame, fear, guilt... And to be honest, you couldn't care less about how he was feeling.

"Your instinct is so spot on, son," he continued and Min Ho nodded, thankful. "All right, I won't distract you. I just wanted to say Baek Jong Won said he'll be happy to cook a dinner at the cabin this weekend. I know how much you love his ramyun."

"The famous chef?" Stella asked, stars in her eyes almost.

"Yeah, he's just a family friend. Think about it." He turned around to leave and smiled at you in acknowledgement as he went past you again. "Miss Park, always a pleasure."

"Your dad's really trying," Stella said, but was ignored.

"Where were we?" Min Ho went back to Eunice and Dae.

"I was just about to leave," Dae said, looking at you. "Sorry, I can't do this."

He joined you while the others called for him. Min Ho frowned, looking back and forth at the both of you but you just took Dae's wrist and rushed to get him out of there — get you both out of there. Deciding you both deserved food for each of your problems, you went to the convenience store to get some instant noodles together. You insisted that it was on you, and even if Dae tried to pay for himself, he ended up letting you take care of it.

Finally seated, you both slurped in silence, enjoying the flavours rather than speak about your issues. That was something the both of you needed terribly. But you couldn't avoid it for too long.

"I think I won't do the talent showcase," Dae stated.

You moved your eyes from your food to him. "One bad rehearsal does not mean you have to give up."

"Did you see me there, Y/N? I was a mess."

You shook your head. "You were definitely out of your comfort zone, but you weren't a mess. You had three people working with you, that's something. They know you've got what it takes."

He sighed. "I don't know... Ah, and sorry about Min Ho. I didn't know they would kiss in front of you or..."

You smiled. "Thank you for worrying, but I'm fine. You know just like me that it's hard, but you have to accept it won't be the same anymore."

He nodded in agreement. "You and me are pretty much on the same boat, yeah."

"Besides, I'm just glad he at least found someone nice and not some random fangirl."

You both shared some laughter. It felt amazing to spend time with him like this. You reminded yourself once more that he was a true friend you could rely on.

The moment was short as you phone began to ring. Both of you looked at the contact. Speaking of your exes, Kitty was the one calling you.

"What's up?" you answered.

"You know how quiet and subtle you are?"

You raised an eyebrow, unsure as to what she was saying. "I guess."

"I'm planning a small heist with Praveena, but we need help..." she said, trying to not sound too crazy.

"Kitty!"

"I need my mom's time capsule and the only way I can get it is by stealing it."

You shut your eyes, discouraged. "How did you come up with that idea?"

"It was Praveena's, actually. Please, Y/N, I really could use some help."

You breathed out. "You can sneak in without me."

"You know how to walk in a room without being noticed. I could use you as a guide!"

"Ugh... Fine, I'll come."

"Oh my God, you're an angel."

"I am aware," you chuckled.

"I do need one last favor from you, though. Please?"

You paused. "What is it?"

Dressed in dark clothes, you followed Kitty to the archives to join Praveena. For a date, this was... something for sure. You spotted the girl soon enough and she waved at you all.

"Oh, great. You brought the mouse and the muscle."

"I'm the muscle?" Min Ho asked and you lightly kicked his side with your elbow.

"Don't get too excited. Like I said, we just need someone tall enough to reach the high stuff," you snorted. "And Dae and Q were busy, so..."

"Hmm, are you sure it's not because you wanted to see me tonight?"

You glared at him. "After having to disinfect my eyes after you and missy's kiss, no thanks."

"Okay," Praveena stopped your bicker. "Huddle up, here's the plan."

You all formed a circle, huddled up, and it was hard to ignore Min Ho's hand placed around your waist. Of fucking course he was still sending you mixed signals while clearly being happy with Stella.

Praveena went on explaining the plan. You immediately got into action and she walked in, acting as a distraction. She exchanged with the old lady at the front desk before signaling for you three to get in. You discreetly crouched down and you rushed in, making as little noise as possible. Kitty and Min Ho followed your lead and you finally got in. You allowed yourself to stand up and turn on your flashlights.

"Why are we going through all this?" Min Ho complained.

"Because I have a whole other side of my family that my mom came here to find. So if this time capsule has a clue on how I can track them down, I have to have it," Kitty whisper-yelled.

"How touching," he said with no emotion whatsoever, causing you to bump the side of his body again. "Hey, will you stop?"

"Show a bit of empathy, here," you rolled your eyes.

"Well, personally, I'd love to erase the existence of half of my family."

Kitty let out a chuckle before going on about looking through the files. Meanwhile, you and Min Ho looked around aimlessly as you keep discussing.

"Correct me if I'm wrong but did your dad fund an entire arts program to spend time with you?"

"That's his move. Big, shallow gesture to make up for not being there. Like inviting me to a ski cabin for Seollal."

"I mean, do you want to fix things with him? I remember you telling me you do miss him," you pointed out, recalling one of your dates.

"I guess so," he admitted. "But... one-on-one time with him is always stressful. It'd be different if there were a bunch of family members around, like there's supposed to be on Seollal. Or even just very annoying and unpleasant people like yourself. As a buffer."

You hummed, faking a smile. "How kind of you," you said before joining Kitty, starting to get annoyed yourself.

He followed you and placed a hand on your shoulder to stop you. "What if we did that?"

You scoffed. "Use me as your buffer?"

"Well, you and the guys. And might as well ask Covey."

Kitty turned to you at the mention of her name. "Oh! I mean, it'd be more fun than hanging out here for the holiday."

You, for once, agreed. "Yeah, I guess. And we'll have your back if your dad's being difficult."

"Still looking out for me, how sweet," he joked.

"Like you said, I'm still your friend."

He was about to say something but noise coming from the front door made you all hide behind shelves.

"Professor Lee, I can assure you I know aisle 12!" Praveena yelled for you to hear.

"Wait, this is aisle 12!" Kitty whispered making you all change you hiding spot. While Kitty took the left, you and Min Ho too the right.

"Why are you shouting?" Mr. Lee asked Praveena. "I am perfectly capable of hearing you as well. I'm not as old as you think."

"I don't think you're old!"

You tried to peek but Min Ho grabbed you a which inevitably brought you back down. "Are you trying to get us caught?"

"I was just-"

He immediately placed his hand over your mouth to hush you. Meanwhile, his eyes glimmered with the little light there was. You began to breathe heavily and you thought he was doing so too. You did feel his hand getting sweaty and a blush a appeared on both of your faces.

"Y/N, about earlier-"

You stopped him, removing his hand from your face. "I'm happy for you."

He frowned. "No, I'm not-"

"I am, really. Stella seems to care about you."

"Don't fake being happy when I'm hurting you."

Kitty joining you lot made you push him away from you as you both stood on your feet. You hadn't even noticed Praveena and Lee were gone by then.

"Praveena just saved our asses. I mean, it's only our second date," she smiled but you and Minho exchanged a look.

"Date?" you scoffed.

"Kitty, she's sweet-talking an old lady whilst you're third-wheeling who used to be the hottest couple in school."

You buried your face in your hands, getting reminded of his cocky ass. "He just meant that it's not much of a date."

"Why don't you bring her skiing?"

Kitty shrugged. "That's kind of a big step." You and Min Ho sighed but Kitty's eyes then lit up. "Oh my God, I think that's it."

Following whete she was pointing at, you finally located the time capsule. Min Ho was quick to get to work, grabbing it for Kitty. Once you've acquired it, you lost no time in getting the hell out of there to join Praveena who was patiently waiting outside. Kitty ran to her for a hug.

"I cannot believe that actually worked. Oh, I wish I had a way to thank you."

"Oh, please," she brushed it off.

Again, you and Min Ho exchanged a look, knowing damn well that you were thinking the exact same thing. And of course, you hated that you still had this type of dynamic.

"Praveena, do you ski?" he asked.

"No, but I snowboard."

Kitty jumped in. "Any chance you want to come with us this weekend to Min Ho's dad's ski cabin?"

"You're inviting me to the Kris Jenner of Korea's vacation home? Hell yeah I wanna come."

"Cool," Kitty giggled. "I can't wait!"

They both began to walk away. As you were about to do the same, Min Ho stopped you by grabbing your hand. You immediately broke away from his hold.

"What?"

He cocked his head to the side. "Don't make this face with me."

"What do you want?"

Seeing you were going to keep the attitude, he spoke. "I know you wanted to cause a diversion the other day, but you forgot your bracelet on the ground."

He took it out of his pocket, presenting it to you. It was still as pretty as shiny as it always has been, maybe even more.

"Min Ho," you breathed out, taking it from him.

"I got it cleaned and I wanted to give it to you when we got coffee. But my dad kind of ruined the moment, so..."

You held it to your chest. "Whatever, I'm just glad I have it back. I forgot that's when I removed it. Thank you."

He nodded. "My pleasure."

He started to walk away, but you were the one to stop him now. "I... My aunt gave me a letter from my father. I haven't opened it yet and I thought we could open it together? I mean, it would definitely help me to read it and maybe it could help you with everything going on with your dad."

He couldn't keep his smile to himself. "I would love to."

The Seollal festival was something everyone had been looking forward to, but especially Juliana. Being the one who she shared her room with now, you listened to her nervousness about exposing her art more than enough. So when it finally came, you were ecstatic to not have to hear about it. And you were also happy for her, obviously.

"Thanks for helping me with setting up the booth."

"No worries," you smiled. "I do want to get food before it runs out..."

She laughed. "Go! Anyway, Yuri should be here any minute."

You ran to get any food you could lay your hands on. It went from Korean delicacies to traditional sweets. And man those sweets were good. From afar, you caught a glimpse of Dae. He seemed to have seen you at the same time since he was already signing for you to come join him. You made your way through the crowd and finally reached him. When you spotted Bora, his little sister, you saw she was eating the same one you had just gotten for yourself.

"Bora, look! We like the same things."

Her eyes grew. "Dae keeps saying it's too sugary, but I think he has bad taste."

You crouched to whisper in her ear. "Between you and me, I think you're right."

She laughed and Dae could only sigh. "Bora, that's your last sweet," he warned and she nodded.

As you sat down, you finally noticed the happy couple who was sat just next to Bora. While you gave Stella a warm smile, you bluntly ignored Min Ho. When you were alone, you were more than happy to be friendly. In front of his new girlfriend, however, it was better to not interact to avoid any argument — that included between you and him, them, or you and her. She was your roommate, you had to have her back somehow.

"Since when do you like children?" he asked.

"You don't know everything about me. That, or you don't pay attention when I talk."

You stared at him with mischievous eyes and he quickly caught on you were simply teasing him. Two could play this game.

"Try me."

Stella put her hand on his arm. "Min Ho," she said in a warning tone.

"What? I like a challenge."

You raised an eyebrow. "Rain check on that, your girlfriend's right. Save your knowledge for trivia night at your dad's cabin."

She seemed to agree with you. "That sounds fun, we should do that instead."

He huffed. "Fine, but we'll see who knows the other better."

The rest of the event went on smoothly surprisingly. Min Ho and you did bicker a lot but Stella joined in instead of being bothered about it. In fact, she and you kind of bonded over some quirks you could not stand about Min Ho. In a way, it felt bittersweet to know she was now the one to enjoy Min Ho's chivalry. On another part, bonding with Stella allowed you to see this as a new chapter. Yes, maybe there will always be a weird tension between Min Ho and you, but you knew you could go past it.

And now, it was time for ski.

"Have you packed?" Stella asked after knocking at your door.

"I just need a few more things and I'll join you."

"I'll be waiting at the cars outside."

You exchanged a smile and you continued to pack. Min Ho did mention there would be a hot tub. And Q did encourage you to buy that one swimsuit when you went shopping. That can never hurt, right? The only thing missing now was the letter. And for the life of you, you could not find it. You were convinced you left it in the bottom drawer of your desk but it was like it vanished into thin air. To say you were frustrated would be an understatement. You were on full panic mode. This was one of the last things your dad left before dying, and your aunt entrusted you with it. How could you lose it?

Seeing that time was passing, you concluded you'd have to look for it when you'd be back. Maybe ask Kitty or Min Ho to help you. Closing your suitcase, you grabbed your coat and headed out.

Only... when you opened the door... you were at loss for words. Not even that, you completely froze at the sight in front of you.

"Covey, cars are here. Let's go!" Min Ho yelled out as he bursted in your dorm.

When his eyes landed on Kitty and Yuri kissing, his reaction was identical to yours. Joining him, you were then noticed by the pair who showed nothing but shame.

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[youkidding-me]

expanding on my previous post about orym witnessing cyrus's funeral

the silken squall burn their deceased over open bodies of water or forests, so their spirits can keep travelling after their bodies are gone

because of this, they have to move the city to the closest body of water/forest

the loved ones or volunteering magic users take turns watching over the body and keeping it cold. it's also a way for the deceased to not be left alone, assuring them their community is with them until the end

during the few days of travel, the immediate family will be showered with love, provided with food and having their house cleaned by their neighbours/friends/distant family. this is to give them time to mour and to prepare the cremation ceremony

dorian's house is the biggest tent in the city, made of probably a few dozen tents connected between each other and almost as tall as a two-story building

everyone lives in portable homes but it's colorful and organized. the tents have creative patterns either weaved, embroidered or painted on them. the stone roads make mosaics of air genasi motifs

the wyvernwind home is the only one covered with a huge linen roofing, though the normal colorful tent peaks underneath it

the entire wyvernwind is dressed in linen. not entirely, though, just their jewelry. dorian is always impeccably dressed, but his rings, earrings, boots, belt and shoulder piece has linen sewn around it. his father and mother are the same

dorian is almost always busy watching cyrus's body, recepting other air genasi that wish to bring food to the wyvernwinds, hand-making the wooden boat that will burn with cyrus in a few days

orym spends a lot of time with goyan enlil-wyvernwind, dorian's mom, since zeru wyvernwind seems to have assumed most of the work on land

(orym suspects the man is avoiding his grieving home's emotional needs like the plague)

they talk a lot about dorian - his childhood, his adventures outside that city, his music, his fight - but she also seems interested about orym

more than once orym thinks if she actually wants to know about his life with the air ashari and how much it's her common diplomatic gait

"the linen?" she answers orym. it took him three days to build courage to ask. "have you noticed how our skin looks against the sky?"

goyan was the slightest darker than dorian, though her hair was a lighter blue. the resemblance to her son was undeniable, even if her eyes were green like cyrus's

"you look like the sky on a clear day"

"every day is clear up here" she said with a smile. "under all this linen, against the blue, what do we look like?"

"clouds" orym answered, and she nodded. "we look like clouds. it's an old tradition that says that, if we cover our loved one in linen, we'll not be saying goodbye to a loved one, but to a cloud passing by."

she managed to say the entire thing with posture, but drops everything she's holding and covers her mouth, breathing hard. "oh no, my baby! my baby, my baby, my baby..."

and orym comforts her, knowing too well what she's feeling

orym can't help to watch cyrus, but he's everywhere else: his hands bleed after cutting all the wood for the boat, he seems to be the only reason dorian remembers to eat and drink water, and he loses his sleep to hold his insomniac lover

"i'm such a fucking failure. i suck, i suck so much. i can't do this, orym, i can't fucking do this" dorian growls against his chest

"i'm right here, my love. we'll do this together. you're doing incredibly, i'm so proud of you."

"it should be him in my place. i was never meant to be here, this not my place"

orym swallows the vision of unconscious dorian in his arms under the radiant gaze of predathos. he wants to smack dorian for saying nonsense, but he knows that pain too well. "not a lot of people can say they were so loved until the very end. in times of chaos, you are giving cyrus the treatment of a prince."

"i barely feel like myself most of the time. i can't remember the days."

and orym holds him, because he knows how it feels

zeru comes back the morning of the ceremony, the sixth day of orym's stay. his skin is ashy and his light blue eyes have sunk into his skull

goyan is keeping him company, touching his arm, his face, his back - and he leans into the touch every time with fail

they have a family meal and zeru avoids dorian's gaze at all costs. orym doesn't know if dorian noticed, because his gaze is equally focused on the table

by the end of the day, the city is reunited, with the wyvernwinds ahead, by the edge of the silken squall. beneath them, the ocean glistens dark blue and purple

cyrus's boat is perfectly tailored for his size, filled with a few of his belongings and his body fully protected by linen. before sending it away, an old genasi lady cuts off the linen on the wyvernwinds clothes and puts the fabric in the boat as well

cyrus floats away, though always closest to dorian than anyone else in the world

dorian whistles a tune as a guard raises a flaming arrow, that flies when the tune ends

fire silently burns the boat into dust as the dozens of genasi watched in complete silence. the only heir of the silken squall holds himself up, though his fingers squeeze orym's painfully

the first time dorian and zeru look at each other is when the last pieces of brumestone fall and there's nothing else to watch. father and son look nothing alike, orym notices - zeru's angular jaw and broad built is an almost ghostly replica of cyrus. dorian's dimples and loose waves resemble his mother a lot more

they don't say a word. dorian's tears are loud and choked, cutting the night air like a knife to the gut. zeru's tears are ragged and tired, ringing with his deep voice, like the land cried with him

goyan hold both of them, closing themselves from the rest of the world

orym decides to leave with the other genasi citizens back to his quarters. as much as he promised he'd be there for him, this was the time for the wyvernwinds. when dorian needs him, he'll be right there to help and support him, like dorian is for him

the night fell, but the sun will always rise in the end

[antianakin]

What's your feeling on Turned to the Light Maul?

So, in general, kind-of ambivalent because I'm ambivalent about Maul.

But if the question here is more, do I think Maul COULD turn back from being Dark, that's more complicated.

Maul is fascinating because he's someone who was raised from birth in darkness, raised by Palpatine, and he DOESN'T KNOW anything else, he has no concept for another way to even BE, so all of his non-Sith relationships are viewed through that lens. His relationship with Savage is intentionally as a "Master" and "Apprentice" rather than brothers because it's the closest relationship Maul can conceive of. Sith don't have friends, they don't have family, they ONLY have masters or apprentices. He does the same with Ezra later, builds up trust with him only to ask him to be an apprentice because he can't conceive of any other possible relationship or any other reason to work with Ezra at all.

But he has the CAPACITY to be better. This is the entire core of Star Wars. He CAN be better because anybody and everybody can be better. But for Maul, it would be harder than most. First he has to learn what living without darkness would even LOOK like, what it entails, what it would ask of him, and then he'd have to decide to CHOOSE that life, over and over again, every day, every hour, every moment, he has to choose it. He has to claw himself out of a pit that he had no hand in putting himself into, a pit he likely didn't even really know was a pit until MUCH later in life probably (and you could even question whether he quite recognizes the pit he was put into at the end, too).

So even though he of course has the CAPACITY to be better, I'm not sure that I think it's particularly LIKELY for him to ever really do it. You need a solid way for him to understand what choice he's making, and then a solid motivation for him to choose to set aside the darkness, and then that motivation needs to last long enough to get him through all of the obstacles and setbacks and challenges that come with genuinely figuring out how to live without darkness. And that's a LOT to ask, and I don't really see it ever happening. It doesn't help that Maul has a lot of enemies, most of whom want him dead, and are unlikely to GIVE him the help he'd need to get anywhere (if they could even do so in the first place).

TL;DR I don't have anything against the concept on paper, although I'm unlikely to read it just because I'm ambivalent about Maul in general, but realistically I don't think Maul would ever really choose to set aside the darkness long enough to do the insane amount of work he'd need to do to truly be able to unlearn everything he understands and believes about who he is and how the world works.

[hansmic]

ཻུ۪۪♡ 𝒞𝒶𝓃𝒹𝓁𝑒𝓁𝒾𝓉 𝒞𝑜𝓃𝒻𝑒𝓈𝓈𝒾𝑜𝓃𝓈┊ཻུ۪۪♡

han jisung x female! reader

summary: After dinner, han jisung sets up a surprise candlelit walk around the neighborhood, holding hands and reflecting on your relationship so far. you share your hopes and dreams for the future, making promises to each other in the soft glow of the candles, and also a unexpected surprise proposal.

genre: fluff, romance

word count: 688

『♡』•『♡』•『♡』•『♡』『♡』•『♡』•『♡』•『♡』『♡』•『♡』•『

Jisung led you through the quiet streets, the warm glow of candles illuminating the path. The flickering flames created a magical atmosphere, as if they were the only two people in the world.

The quiet was broken only by the soft sound of their footsteps and the occasional rustling of leaves. They walked hand in hand, enjoying each other's company and the peaceful surroundings

"This feels like a scene from a movie," Jisung said, his voice a little quieter than usual. "Walking hand in hand, the candlelight casting a warm glow, it's all so romantic.'

You giggled, feeling a little coy. "Who knew the great Han Jisung was such a romantic?" you teased, giving his hand a little squeeze. It was amazing to think that this was the same person you had been crushing on for so long, and it still took your breath away to be with him like this.

"I just want to make this night perfect for you," Jisung said, looking into your eyes. "I know our relationship hasn't always been smooth sailing, but I want you to know that I'm grateful for every moment we have together. I love you."

You felt your heart swell with emotion. "I love you too," you whispered, your voice trembling slightly. "I can't believe how lucky I am to have you in my life. I can't wait to see what the future holds for us."

As you walked, the air was filled with whispered promises and declarations of love. The night seemed to stretch on forever, each moment more perfect than the last. And as the candles began to burn down, Jisung knew it was time for the final surprise.

He stopped suddenly, turning to face you. His eyes were shining with excitement as he dropped down to one knee. "There's something I've been wanting to ask you," he said, reaching into his pocket.

You felt your heart leap into your throat as Jisung pulled out a small, velvet box. Inside was a beautiful ring, its diamond catching the light and casting sparkles onto the ground. You could hardly breathe as Jisung spoke the words you had been dreaming of.

Jisung took a deep breath, his eyes never leaving yours. "I never thought I'd find someone like you," he said, his voice filled with emotion. "You've changed my life in so many ways, and I can't imagine my future without you. You're my best friend, my soulmate, my everything. I love you more than words can express.

"I want to spend the rest of my life with you," Jisung continued, his voice trembling slightly. "I want to wake up every morning next to you, to share all my joys and sorrows with you, and to support you in all your dreams. You're the person I want to grow old with, the person I want to build a life with. And I can't wait to start that journey with you."

As he finished, Jisung held out the ring, his hand trembling slightly. He looked up at you, his eyes filled with love and hope. "Will you marry me?" he asked, his voice barely above a whisper.

You felt your eyes well up with tears as you stared at the ring, your heart bursting with joy. You nodded, unable to speak. Finally, you found your voice, and said the words that would change your life forever. "Yes," you whispered. "Yes, I will marry you."

Jisung slipped the ring onto your finger, and you both stood up, tears streaming down your faces. You wrapped your arms around him, hugging him tightly. The moment was perfect, a memory you would cherish forever.

"I promise to love you for the rest of my life," Jisung said, kissing you softly. "I can't wait to start this next chapter with you, my love."

You held onto him, feeling completely and utterly in love. The ring sparkled on your finger, a symbol of the promises you had made to each other. You knew that this was just the beginning of a beautiful journey, and you couldn't wait to see what the future held for you both.

『♡』•『♡』•『♡』•『♡』『♡』•『♡』•『♡』•『♡』『♡』•『♡』•『

Happy Valentine’s Day!

make sure to check out my other stories masterlist is here!

[pandora-writes-one-piece]

Hello!!

I really enjoy and look forward to your works!! I'm always excited when i get a notification of yours jaja.

My friend and I are planning on beginning a fanfiction of our own. I was wondering if you could give any tips on the writing process or maybe things you wish someone had told you when you had started.

I hope you're having a lovely day!!!!

Hello @frizzothehobbit thank you so, so much for the wonderful ask! I've been thinking about this, and I wanted to consider it properly before I answered, because there's so much to talk about regarding this subject. But I can't be thinking about this for all eternity, so here it is, my answer!

First off, I feel like a dinosaur because I started writing fanfiction more than 20 years ago... dear lord, I'm ancient! And if everything feels daunting when starting out, it's because it is! But it doesn't really have to be. Why, you ask? Because if you've decided to write fanfiction, there's already passion behind your intentions, and that is SO important! So, first off, and everybody's favourite:

WRITE WHAT YOU WANT!

Which is basically the same as saying: write for yourself. And as overused as this expression is, it's still true. Obviously we, authors, thrive on comments and feedback: it makes us grow! - And when I say this I'm not just talking about positive feedback, but constructive feedback! - But if you write what you want and love it, you're already halfway to writing a good story. Next:

INVEST SOME TIME IN YOUR STORY!

We, as authors, all wrote (and will write) drabbles at one time or another. Or mindless one-shots that we just needed to get out of our heads and onto the page. It's sooo valid. But my advice if you want to write a longer story: plan it! It helps avoid the 'oh-so-dreaded' plot holes (and this is actual advice I would have loved when I started... it would have saved me a lot of unfinished fics!) And of course, no two people plan the story the same way. I, for one, just think it through in my head (mostly in the shower, before falling asleep or doing mindless tasks such as cleaning), but I know other authors who plan every chapter and every step of the way so, here's another one:

FIND WHAT WORKS FOR YOU!

Be it in storytelling (first person, past tense, present tense, different POVs...), in planning (plan every single detail, just plan the direction of the story or don't plan at all...) or in deciding how much of a canon character are you willing to change. And this brings me to another point:

DON'T BE SCARED TO WRITE OUT OF CHARACTER!

Nobody is going to crucify you for that! It's fanfiction, people, it's not a history paper or a thesis. If you find yourself constantly thinking about this, you'll always doubt your work, so try to avoid dwelling on it, if possible.

CHECK FOR TYPOS

Mistakes are going to happen. You just can't avoid them. Unless you find yourself a Beta (and even then, it happens!). Typos, grammar and spelling mistakes fly by us authors when we're excited about our storytelling, so re-read what you wrote as many times as you want/need! I know I must have my fair share of mistakes (alas, I apologise for English not being my native language in every fiction I write), but I re-read my chapters a lot of times (I'm not even going to say how many - it's unhealthy!) and trust me, it shows if you don't give your story at least a good thorough read! Speaking of reading...

READ! READ! READ! READ A LOT!

Devour books, fanfiction, papers... whatever you can get your hands on. It's another cliché when it comes to writing tips, but it's overused for a reason. Reading a lot helps build a great vocabulary! And it helps you avoid annoying repetitions... Which brings me to another awesome tip:

USE A THESAURUS!

Suuuuuuuch a big help! Especialy when you're not a native speaker! Sometimes I find myself so stuck on a word that a thesaurus truly saves my life! Also:

DON'T BE AFRAID TO EDIT!

The scene isn't turning out the way you wanted it? CUT IT! It doesn't move the story forward? CUT IT! It doesn't fit the character? CUT IT! I've cut entire 1k+ scenes from some of my fanfictions because they made the story take a turn that I didn't like! Which brings me to another important tip:

LET THE CHARACTERS DO THEIR THING!

Sometimes your character just runs away from you and starts doing stupid shit. It's a known fact amongst all authors. Just let them be. Run with it. If the scene doesn't suit the story (say it with me...) CUT IT! But I've found so many times that the best plots in my stories come from characters who just decided they didn't give a flying f**k about me and went rogue! Last but not least (and because this is becoming a thesis in itself):

DON'T BE DISAPPOINTED!

Not all fics get comments. Not all fics get a lot of views. Not everyone who reads and likes, will comment. It's alright. We authors are used to it. And although it's a known fact that many authors have praise kinks (me included), and love to know people read and like their stories, don't expect too much and you won't be disappointed.

I really didn't want to end on that sad note, and maybe some people will disagree with me, but it's astounding how big the difference is between views and likes (or kudos on AO3) and comments. #CommentsMatter!

Also, and here's an extra:

DON'T COMPARE YOURSELF TO OTHERS!

We all have favourite authors, and we all wish we could write like someone we idealize (Oh, Edgar Allan Poe, how I adore thee!), but it's not fair to compare yourself to another author. You're not more or less than another writer! YOU'RE YOU! And that's already awesome!

Oof... maybe I could have gone on longer than this... maybe I could've added more tips. But this is what I thought of, and I do hope you, and other people, find them somewhat helpful! Thank you again for the wonderful ask!

Love you! ❤️

PS: Engage with the community! Not only is it heartwarming, comforting, and rewarding, but as a commenter myself, I love having little debates with authors about why they wrote a scene in a specific way, or what they have in mind for what's coming next! Whatever it is, I guarantee you'll have a good time!

[t4tozier]

let's think about jayvik after the finale. they're magically alive and okay 👍

how do they get along with the other characters? what do they get up to in their free time? do they ever get pets? etc etc. head full of self indulgent happy jayvik bc they desperately need normalcy

hmmm this is very internesting. so in terms of their interactions with other characters i have to say that i realized that rather than arcane as a whole being my new hyperfixation it’s literally just jayvik (and zaundads to a lesser extent) so these hcs may be mid. but we persist

if jayvik don’t die then neither do jinx and vander. first of all. viktor doesn’t have the capacity to undo the warwickification of vander but they work something out

and i’ve always loved the hc of jayvik mentoring jinx and ekko so that definitely continues. chaos ensues but it’s good for jinx to have an outlet to create (and continue blowing things up) with adult supervision, and they both have new perspectives and creative ideas that occasionally make jayvik kick themselves for not thinking of it first

i don’t think that either jayce or viktor would be happy if they weren’t still innovating and creating, but they kind of. let hextech die out. which sucks, especially for jayce, whose entire life’s work had to be scrapped because they got too big for their britches, essentially.

i think jayce and viktor both deal with a lot of grief and guilt for their actions. they both blame themselves for the creation of hextech in the first place, jayce blames himself for killing viktor (even though vik understands after. yknow. everything) and that his idea was the one to lay waste to piltover. viktor, though jayce tries to insist that it was the hexcore controlling him and that he didn’t really know what he was doing, still feels responsible for his actions

but this time they have each other, and they have their friends, and it’s both harder and easier than it used to be to deal with their feelings

anyway onto the happy stuff

viktor and caitlyn have a wary sort of allyship. they both hold grudges but they try to get along for jayce’s sake

jayce is personally elated that cait has found someone. especially someone he can roughhouse because vi always brings out his immature side <3 he definitely gets his ass handed to him though

they both keep the long hair. jayce keeps the beard. viktor complains about beard burn but also thinks jayce looks very handsome with it so he suffers through it <3

viktor gets an axolotl. he loves that thing like a child.

jayce finds a stray dog on the streets after the war and feeds him. he ends up following jayce home and he has to sheepishly explain to viktor that he won’t leave jayce alone so he figured he should just bring him home.

viktor isn’t particularly mad about this—except for when the dog takes his spot in bed. that’s unacceptable. jayce will just scoop the dog up and put him on the other side so he’s the middle spoon between vik and the dog.

(also. jayce with a service dog ??)

…viktor with a service axolotl??

the arcane/astral plane did not completely heal either of them—they both still require their leg braces, and jayce gets a crutch for when it gets cold—but viktor’s no longer terminally ill. jayce cries when they find out.

even though the arcane no longer powers their inventions, they do go back to their initial ideas from way back when, bringing their inventions to the people, rebuilding the filtration system in zaun, building better and stronger mobility aids and prosthetics for anyone who needs it. the talis fortune pays for much of this—they no longer want investors, or anyone else, to tell them what they should build

[austinslounge]

I didn't want to bring it up, but now that another anon mentioned it, I'll admit that I too am worried about Austin's disappearance. I don't expect him to be seen out on dates like a wild man, but he hasn't even been spotted out with friends in LA or elsewhere. One red flag was just 2 nights ago, when Dune 2 cinematographer & Josh Brolin had a Dune book release party at a gallery. Denis & Timmy showed up, but not Austin. Can't he do at least the minimum promo, as a courtesy to his friends?

I'm glad he's been spending valuable time reconnecting with family, but eventually he'll want to go back to the life and career that he's worked so hard for. Yes, there are certain successful actors that can live a life completely outside of Hollywood (Ryan Gosling comes to mind), but Austin is just not there yet. He's still building his career, and any talent manager or pr professional will tell him to get out there & network.

I know you are of the opinion that Austin was so happy to dump K's ass & they were a meaningless pr relationship, but what if that's not the case? What if he had a change of heart or was hoping to patch things up, but K moved on like Austin never existed? What if the breakup has taken its toll & he is struggling? None of us are in his head, by your own admission, so we don't know what negative thoughts he might have while alone & no longer with a romantic companion. That can be the case for any person, but compounded by the pressures of Hollywood stardom makes things even more challenging.

Okay, you all are going to need a seat for this one, because I have a lot to say.

Anon, I understand your concern, but keep in mind that even early last year, Austin wasn't spotted in LA for months unless it was during a red carpet event (and he had several last year).

His pap visibility, even from last year in LA, subsided drastically. The only time he was usually papped was when he was spotted with [Redacted] or in NYC filming. I think it's pretty clear now who was calling the paps.

I think fans just got used to him promoting a bunch of stuff last year, being everywhere for "Elvis" promo and awards season, and being with a pap-calling gf, that fans didn't realize that he's actually pretty low-key when he's not working or dating someone who's calling the paps every 2 seconds. 😒

Keep in mind that Austin might not even be in LA atm. We really don't even know. He hasn't been spotted since Colorado. If he's spending time visiting his family, then good for him! That should be encouraged, not discouraged (imo).

Also, keep in mind that Austin and Callum hung out and weren't papped or even seen by locals while out together. They mentioned during their MOTA press tour that they hung out together with each other while Callum was in LA visiting from London. We didn't even know that they had hung out in LA together until they themselves mentioned it. Again, more signs that Austin isn't the one calling paps on himself.

It's also good to remember that Austin is usually a homebody. Even Florence said during their Dune Press Tour that she had to drag him out of his hotel room to get him go out while they were in Budapest filming lol. 😅 He's an introvert. Him being by himself or not "out and about" doesn't mean he's depressed. Just because you're alone, it doesn't necessarily mean you feel "lonely". You can be in a relationship and still feel very lonely and dejected. (Keep that in mind)

Wrt the Dune Book Release Party -- Ummm...Timmy is the lead in Dune Part 2. Austin is not. Timmy is also campaigning for an Oscar. Austin is not. Austin has already done the whole Oscar campaigning where he was seen everywhere. He's not going to do something that he doesn't have to do lol.

Austin's career and visibility is just fine imo. It's actually very smart if he wants to be an actor who people can realistically believe can disappear into various different roles. Maybe he himself doesn't want to become too overexposed since he already went through a huge Elvis press tour & awards season where he was everywhere, and he had 3 projects to promote last year.

Austin (so far) seems like he's honestly just enjoying his life and time off before he has to promote 2 films this year, and possibly film something else.

Look, I know some of you out there may have this whole fantasy in your heads about how Austin is missing [Redacted] and wants her back lol, but just look at the facts!

Austin dumped [Redacted]. It was his decision! It wasn't like she dumped him, and now he's feeling bad and wants to make things work. It didn't even seem like they had a huge blown up fight and broke up in haste! According to DM, he had even stopped making an effort 6 months prior to see her. That right there should tell you something. She was turning him off pretty badly if he didn't even want to see her, even just for.... 👀 Look -- He pretty much showed by his actions how he feels.

Austin and [Redacted] broke up months ago. In fact, I believe they broke up even as early as September. Don't you think that if he wanted her back, he would have done something by now?? She's been single for months before getting with Lewis lol.

If Austin were "sad" about her being with another guy and wanted her back, don't you think he would have done something to get her back while she was getting close with Marcello?? Toe Thumbs Dude? Santa's Lap Dude? Think about it. 🤔

Look at the way Austin looked while in a relationship with [Redacted]. Can you honestly (with a straight face) say that Austin looked happy...especially all of 2024 with her? Why would you think that he would want to go back to a relationship w/a woman who he looked miserable and depressed with most of the time?? Someone who he was liking videos on IG tagged "toxic relationships"? Girl, get real! Idk any man who would be mourning a relationship like that. Especially one in which her family threw him under the bus, and one where the media was going back and forth on how "they have nothing in common" and there's "trouble in paradise". Why regress back into a relationship in which Austin didn't even look in love with her? (And we all know what Austin in love looks like -- We had 8 years of seeing him in love).

In conclusion, before I end this essay, I just wanted to say that we just need to be patient. We will see Austin again.😊 He will pop up (maybe even unexpectedly!?). Fans just have to be patient, that's all. 💜

[skekthesilly]

skek would it be odd to say that we love you a lot and intimately and viscerally but like. platonically. because thats how we feel we love you and youre like the friend ever. we love you! /platonic. society has tainted our view on closeness so much sometimes we feel uncomfortable saying we love our friends. but we do. we love our friends!! i need to enforce the world platonically i can hear all the "oooh you like ____!!!" comments from miles away -🍞

pawns leak would it be odd to say (/platonically. keep that in mind) that i love you? i love you with all my heart and soul? i love you with every fiber of my being? i see you on my screen and i go "you're my friend. you love me. i love you." and seeing you genuinely brightens up my day? is it weird to say that as soon as you commented on that one butterfly liam post i made i fell in love with you? and i want to be your friend forever? and ever? is it weird to want to become a cryptid with you and roam the wilderness and explore abandoned malls together? old hotels? office buildings? churches? amusement parks? factories? is it weird i want to sleep on your shoulder all cuddled up in a blanket together? is it weird that i love you intimately and viscerally and carnally and platonically? is it weird i want to be your friend forever and hang out with you forever and be with you forever? is it weird to love you despite being separated by a screen? and not even knowing what we look like? not even knowing what we sound like? is it weird to love you forever and ever? is it weird to yearn for you because you're like the second half of my soul? my heart? my body? my mind? is it weird to say i love you so much? that words could not even describe it? is it weird to say i love you to the ends of the universe and back, forever and evermore, from every life i have ever lived to every life i will live? because i love you? as a friend of course

[csphire]

I think what really breaks the Solavellan romance in VG for me is how much closure for the Inquisitor is sidelined in favor of Solas's half of the relationship. I get it. Forgiveness is important and it's his lowest moment but after everything Lavellan as a character had to go through and experienced, everything the character canonically loses, there's something off about seeing it all kind of end with an anti-climactic "Lavellan joins him in fade prison so he doesn't have to be alone." It feels almost like she's his reward. I'm glad for some people they like the ending but, man, it just doesn't sit right with me. Who comforts Lavellan over her lost friends? Who is there for her while the blight destroys Southern Thedas? Who helped her adjust to life after the loss of her arm? And unlike with Solas, none of that was the result of her choices or due to mistakes she made. Idk maybe I'm just wildly off base but I feel like while at least some of the writing has compassion for Solas there is none that is tangibly afforded to the Inquisitor. It feels like compared to the Warden and Hawke at least, a Solas-manced Inquisitor gets such a lack of care. They do almost all of the giving and they lose so much but it's never really tangibly acknowledged within the VG romance. people like to say "just head-canon it" but why am I doing the writers job for them? They had this romance span two games and involve a major antagonist, there should have been a more thoughtful and nuanced ending for VG.

I agree, with all the build-up in Trespasser it felt set up for the Inquisitor to play a bigger part in DA4. And out of all of the companions, it also felt like Varric was the one who helped the most, for not just Lavellan but any Inquisitor, to pick up the pieces after Solas left. He gave them a Kirkwall title, and key to the city, and basically rolled out the red carpet to help them feel like they had a place to call home when they would inevitably leave Skyhold behind for good. I feel like he led the charge in tracking down Solas in what I've seen in the comics too. So his death is a gut punch to any Inquisitor but it's just brushed aside and minimized for the plot twist and so a Lavellan can choose to go with Solas into the Fade. Please keep in mind, one thing I've not gotten a clear answer on, as I've not made it so far into the game is, did Rook know Varric was dead when he encourages the Inqusitor to redeem Solas? But on another note, the Veilguard broke at least one rule when it came to party sizes so I don't understand why we could not have broken another rule and had two protagonists to control when it came to dialogue at least. And many of us would have loved to have seen our Inqusitor fighting again as a temporary companion too because so many in the past in FB groups would drop ableist comments on how the Inqusitor cannot fight anymore with just one hand. It sickens me BioWare seemed to double down on this. With all the tough things out there they have handled in the past to address racism, sexism, gay and trans rights they shy away from addressing ableism? Like with Neve if we told her to take it easy because she was hurt at the beginning she could have had a talk with Rook about coddling her because of her artificial leg. But that didn't happen or any comment made about it at all. On one hand not addressing and focusing on her character instead might be cathartic for someone in a similar situation in real life. But honestly, I feel like Neve missing a leg was just put there to silence any criticism of benching the Inquisitor and in your words turning a Lavellan into Solas's reward. But I have seen some comments here and there that Mike did not want a Lavellan happy ending to happen at all. And it was the writers who pushed for it to happen for the sake of the Solas fans. So I sit here with a lot of mixed feelings about the whole thing. Two of my favorite characters in the whole Dragon Age series and one of them murdered the other and it leaves such a bitter taste in my mouth. I don't think Solas should have been so much of an antagonist in Veilguard mainly because he was not in the Inquisition. For me, Solas felt so out of character in Veilguard. Plus what he did ruined any chance for my Lavellan reconciling with him because he's now killed two of his friends one of them a mutual of my Lavellan's. For me at least one does not run off with someone who has a track record like that ten years after he dumped my ass. Plus giving Solas a second chance feels... dirty, like an insult to Varric's memory. That and Lavellan deserves better than to sacrifice her safety, comfort, and possibly even life for Solas at this point. And I hate how the writers and the whole game sets things up that leaves me feeling like that.