#i will start screaming and never stop
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When you find her, you give it to her.
#tv: the x files#txfedit#fox mulder#mulder and scully#xfilesnet#i will start screaming and never stop#he wore her cross#character: fox mulder#otp: mulder and scully#things i made
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why does nobody talk about this fucking movie. are you seeing this shit. "come on, i need you." what the fuck
#it is 2am#i am so tired#i am high as fuck#i haven't stop crying since i started the movie#this scene was such a one hit kill there has never been and never will be any media better than the tos movies they just capture. Everythin#my posts#st#tos#star trek tos#star trek the original series#the undiscovered country#star trek the undiscovered country#spock#kirk#captain kirk#jim kirk#spirk#k/s#the premise#'i was prejudiced by her accomplishments as a vulcan' because there's still a small part of him that wishes to be fully vulcan. scream
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totals ur drama
#shut up. dont say a word. total drama lives in my SOUL but that wasnt how this started.#so i talk abt it privately a bit but im currently Drowning in ideas. ive never had this happen before. i have a backlog of ~25 drawings#and then i thought 'oh maybe it WOULD be fun to build a silver rig! a simple one! like the chihiro DR rig i built!'#and then i SCREAMED INTO THE VOID because i do not have TIME!!!! even a SIMPLE RIG IS MINIMUM A FULL DAYS WORK#but does reason ever stop me??? NO. so i fuckign. DREW THIS AFTER TODAY'S BG SERIES WORK. YKNOW. JUST IN CASE#im smashing my head with ROCKS i am DERANGED. i am CURSED. i do not have TIME FOR THJIS. HES SO CYUTE#twst#twisted wonderland#twst silver#suntails#oh yea but also im obsessed with total drama and always have been and always will be and have watched the reboot seasons#multiple times each and i have them downloaded just in case and i read the tumblr webcomic total trauma and have for years and and and#gripping ur shoulders. leave. get out of here before i keep yapping
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House & Wilson in S7 E5: babysitting Rachel and baby-talking to her
Me in Google Docs immediately after:
Sneak peek here. 👀
#KAYLA'S SCREAMINGS#house md#gregory house#james wilson#hilson#new fic wip alert!!#dont get your hopes up on me finishing it#i start and stop projects all the time whoch is why I never talk about them to begin with#........buuuuuttttttt#this fits perfect with an old idea#so who tf knows
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one piece filler ep where they run into another peto-peto villain of the week guy but this time instead the devil fruit power rearranges people's brain chemistry so they have the thoughts behaviours emotional intelligence etc of a dog. zoro gets hit but he's just exactly the same
#it's a problem in that of it's a non-problem. i.e. no one notices so it never gets addressed. the straw hats just leave#zoro starts growling and barking at an enemy mid-fight and nami's like i really wish this was new for you but we all know it's not.#sanji finds zoro in the store room like 4 weeks later on all fours gnawing on a bone and is like yeah nothing out of the ordinary here#(kicks him out)#his tactile needs increase marginally but luffy's already on top of this so it goes entirely under the radar#he catches a rabbit with his bare teeth and starts shaking it around and usopp just starts screaming CAN YOU FUCKING STOP WITH THAT SHIT#(normal usopp-zoro interaction)#zoro gets flocked by children one time and he just. accepts it. Lets them pile up and crawl all over him. And Robin's like ''actually....'#''No. Nothing new.''#the gang only start getting suspicious 4 months in when zoro gets into a habit of sitting between luffy's legs or at his feet#but the suspicion is honestly more directed towards the relationship status there#one piece#op#opla#zolu#roronoa zoro#zoro#CJ's op watch-through
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Actually all gravity falls shipping wars in back when the show was airing were hilarious. i once saw two ppl arguing abt wether pinecest or stancest was better like guys i think its better if we just throw both of you into the bottomless pit forever
#mabcifica wasn't mainstream until like 2019 which left dipcifica raining supreme on the pacifica front#but the billdips and dipcificas were ALWAYS at eachothers throats#oh yeah and wendip too of course. it was just this trifecta of fighting#and everyone would be screaming and throwing chairs and shit snd then someone in the back would go 'i ship stan and goldie :)'#and for just a moment the fighting would stop bc everyone agreed that was endgame..... and then the candips would show up#like candips never did anything to anyone but bc they liked roadside attraction in 2016 they were actually hellspawn to everyone#candips were caught in the crossfire of rage. shoutout to all the 2016 candip shippers you deserved better#i know i saw mabill stuff a couple times but it had absolutely no impact on anything. net 0 change#like i said in that last post once the finale aired everyone kinda just. stopped fighting bc there was So Much Happening#there's a real life bill statue somewhere out there we can't be wasting our time here#but i think actually maybe blubsland going canon killed it all too. like we all agreed that was a huge win for everyone#we all put aside our differences for just a moment to applaud The Gay Cops#'they were disneys first gay couple' WRONG goat and a pig#all this to say shipping wars are dumb and if someone's being gross just kill them or something idk#you don't have to make a whole big thing outta it just block them and move on fighting isn't worth it#it is funny in hindsight tho. and if fiddauthors wanna start a war with billfords i'll be watching from the sidelines with popcorn#sassy speaks#gf
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one thing that i don't think we talk about enough is the connection between fatphobia/skinnyphobia and ableism. like how many times have you heard someone say "i'm just concerned about their health", "they're so skinny they look sickly", "their weight will cause health problems" etc, said in a derogatory tone. and yeah sometimes weight is linked to health problems. that is true. but how is that a bad thing? when people scoff at overweight or underweight people and justify it with "they must be so unhealthy", it not only reinforces beauty standards as they pertain to size, but it also implies that health is morally good, and anyone who "looks unhealthy" (and of course not everyone who is overweight or underweight is unhealthy, that's just a connection people make because beauty standards are so fucked up) is morally reprehensible. i know i'm not the first person to say it, far from it, but i do think health should be discussed more when we're talking about body image and the pressure put on people, and especially women, to look a certain way. it's not just about size, it's about not showing any signs that you may struggle with your health in any way. whether it's hormonal imbalances, mental health, or anything else. the pressure put on people, and again, women especially, to look a certain way, is (and this just an example) one of the reasons why it still takes some people years to get diagnosed with pcos. you get told that if you're gaining weight, then you should go to the gym and diet to lose it. you get asked how many burgers you've had in the past month. because if your weight is "abnormal" then it must be because of something bad you did. if you're unhealthy it must be your fault. god forbid every body be naturally different and react to things differently. so anyway idk how to end this but like, body shaming and health shaming often go hand in hand and, i think, should be treated as a joint issue.
#rain posts#idk if this is coherent#i'm just so tired of struggling with my health and being told to exercise more#i'm tired of my little sister being told to monitor everything they eat because they're gaining weight#BY THEIR ENDOCRINOLOGIST#like we KNOW my sister has a hormonal imbalance#they went through puberty at like 7 years old#and yet their doctor (and my mum) keeps telling them to diet#i'm so tired of being told that fat = bad and that unhealthy = bad#and that if you're unhealthy you should at least try to hide it#you can't look fat because then people might know you're sick#or think you're sick even when you're not#if i start to scream i'll never stop
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i ran into my ex at the store today and he payed for all of my fucking groceries . . . i will never be the same
#yes i WILL be rambling in these tags because this literally changed the trajectory of my life#i haven’t seen him in three months and now we’re meeting in the middle of aisle three?#we started talking and it felt like we never even broke up . . . he’s stil so perfect i just wanna scream#then we went to the cash register and he brought out his fucking card? i was so confused 😭#i kept telling him he didn’t have to BUT HE INSISTED AND SAID NOTHING CAN STOP HIM FROM CARING FOR MEEEEE#yes I cried in my car after that#would it be wrong for me to say i wanna get back with him? because im this close to folding#— harmoni rambles
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I started a post about my ears hurting and itching all the time and deleted it like what is there to say lol it's just another thing that causes me 24 hour misery and wakes me up when I try to sleep and makes me sound completely insane when I say stuff like oh uh sorry I can't actually wear those headphones because they cause agonizing pain after a few minutes. yeah theyre the over ear headphones but the thin layer of speaker covering mesh barely touches the tip of my ear so you know.. the intolerable pain after a little bit. the most boring and offputting thing you could say to someone. yes I've been to a doctor no they didnt have any input. why would they
#i had a dozen ear infections as a toddler my earlier memories are screaming in pain in the doctor's office#and the pain started and never stopped#stomach ears legs upper arms head those are the worst areas#i just learned to ignore it for short periods but its always there#i think its probably just my fat and cartilage eating themselves and the actual diagnosis wouldnt matter#who cares
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Uh oh
It’s missing c!ranboo time
#starts pounding the ground with my fists while screaming#the special interest can stop being strong but it never fully leaves#I will always be unwell over them#mcyt#dsmp#cranboo
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sometimes i get nishiki i really do
#snap chats#like from an outsider perspective it is utterly hilarious watching everything go wrong for him#BUT GIRL NOT ME STOP HAVING THIGNS GO WRONG FOR MEEEEEE WHAT IS ALL THIS#this month its actually one thing after another if i start wearing white everyone needs to be concerned#you guys remember my bullshit roommates yeah well TLDR im getting fined for their messes im going to SCREAM#I HATE IT HEERRRREEE I KNOW IM EVIL BUT CMON#literally had such a silly night last night and now everything sucks again is this life is this what life is#its not its not what life is im just hearing my mom bitching in the other room and im letting her vibes ruin mine#everything going to be ok this is just a hiccup .... a small pinprick in the tapestry of life ....#i am incredibly annoyed though cause this is one of those situations where youve done nothing wrong but youre being shot for it#its just unfair but whatever we ball ..... im putting the hair gel away guys im not slicking my hair back just yet ....#i got a new friend last night so maybe ill just hang with them later and ill remember life is beautiful ..#heh ... jk ... i can remind myself life is beautiful right now ... im gonna go eat some tiramisu ...#jesus christ i really do love italian food what the fuck. pasta / calamari / tiramisu#i dont think calamari is italian but i got it from an italian place w/e we get the picture#its not my fault that italy has good food ... i would just never go there .....#ok bye ima go eat and drink water now. water will remind me how beautiful life is ...
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aching to be feminine again. it hurts so bad n clouds up the mind. makes everythin feel like it's my fault
#it's not fair none of it is taught to me n now i gotta start not from the bottom but in a hole drilled deeper in where im a scared child#i keep lookin at this one pretty photo of me but remember gettin my voice clocked the same evening n nobody told her to fuck off#i feel like im more of a pussy now than i was then. death by a million cuts. this is unbearable. n i never stopped wanting to kick n scream#but i cant
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Saw some of the grossest parenting today in the bus
#this dad was on his phone the whole bus ride ok#and his two kids were screaming arguing#at most he would periodically tell them to lower their voice while still on his phone#one time he told them to stop the one sitting next to him hit him 😭 and he went back to look at his phone with no reaction#my guy something is seriously wrong with you#your kids are screaming at each other doesn't even matter all that much that we are in the bus rn#theyre not just being loud kids you need to do smt!!!!!! its too early for this!!! i could hear them even with my noise cancelling headphone#anyways#ive never seen smt like this#and i work in a mall i see lots of parents and kids#idk smt really disgusting about a parent just not even interested in engaging with their kids#dude no wonder they're loud they probably want ur attention#also this one lady once who came in wjth a big stroller#and the store where i work has little moving rooms between the aisle so this woman decided TO LEAVE THE STROLLER WITH A KID INSIDE AT THE#FRONT OF THE STORE#the kids started crying and his hrother (toddler not in the stroller but not following the mom for some reason) started exploring and i#i had to watch them until the mom came back but like the woman just left them there???#i just stepped in but what if i hadnt??? lady?????????#i see lots of cute interactions of course#like this little girl who came with who i think is her grandpa and he asked me to help her chose her next manga read 😭💖#i basically work in a book/toy store#theres a lot of candy as well the kids love it#idk i like seeing kids being happy ok it is healing#like all the kids sitting on the floors deep in their books while the parents shop 😭😭😭 makes me smile every time top tier behavior
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#can I just. scream for a second#so as is news to no one#we need to start over the entire us medical system from scratch#also I would like to be flayed alive and start over from scratch in the skin department as well#anyway for context: I've had some kind of rash/acne/infection/irritation all over my legs for over a year now#have tried various products and changed habits and products to try and get rid of it to no avail#everyone said you should really just go to a dermatologist#(I was not that inclined to do so bc the previous and only time I'd seen a dermatologist it was not a good experience. very condescending#also I don't like making appointments and stuff. girl I don't have time)#but I decided to be an adult and go (my insurance info seemed to imply I could go with zero copay even)#spoilers: that was not the case#anyway so I show up and surprise surprise: it sucked#she was dismissive and condescending imo. was literally like 'well it could be A B or C but I can't tell'#'all of those are basically impossible to get rid of anyway but the things to try are X Y or Z'#I asked to try Z since X and Y are things that I already tried and did nothing (which I had told her!!!)#but she just kept being like 'you just need to stop picking at it. that's the real problem and that's what's exacerbating your scarring'#(wow thanks never thought of that!) (she also insinuated that my scarring was ugly)#girl I'm not 5 years old I understand.#unfortunately for me that is a compulsion so strong it would probably take years of directed therapy to get me to stop doing that#what I'm here to see you about is to figure out what the problem is and how to stop it from happening in the first place#and STOP TRYING TO MAKE IT A COSMETIC ISSUE#it's causing me pain and discomfort that's the main problem! I would like that to stop!! and me not touching it would not solve that proble#also I wanted to ask her about something else but they were too quick about it. felt very Handled if you know what I mean#but anyway#she gave me a prescription for topical antibiotic which was the thing I had not tried#apparently my insurance doesn't cover it and it's also made of gold and plutonium or something#so she gave me a coupon for it#but get this#when I went to pick it up at the pharmacy they didn't take the coupon#the guy said. 'um this only works for the generic brand. and we don't have the generic brand'
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what’s really disheartening about the maya/tori situation on tiktok is seeing maya adopt white supremacist suppression tactics (the fake smiling, tears, and the muting of tori) in their dialogue. to me at least, this just shows that the way non-poc leftists have been centering themselves in the movement of palestinian liberation here in the united states has been not only successful, but welcomed, going off of the reactions to the livestream.
historically, black american activists have been some of palestine’s biggest and longest supporters. activists and diplomats like ralph bunche was critical of the development of israel before they (israel) even declared themselves a state. malcom x was deeply tied to the palestinian cause, eventually visiting gaza before his assassination. james baldwin, angela davis, the black panther party, and more recently, the ferguson protesters have all had close ties and even direct communication with palestinian liberationists. there legitimately has not been a bigger or more vocal group in america for palestinian liberation than black americans as a whole.
the lack of intersectional interest in the face of kamala harris’s campaign has been insane. the assumption that black americans are ignorant to harris’s sins as attorney general is so far from reality that i am genuinely in awe. black americans were more affected by her stances in california than any other minority group, and the assumption that we forgot is so baffling that i am almost speechless. kamala is not a perfect candidate, however, many lgbtq+, black, and disabled folks can recognize that she is the lesser of two evils. neither candidate is ideal, but it is common knowledge that third party candidates have no chance of even denting the polls this close to the election. (for even the smallest chance of a third party candidate winning, we would have to start voting in every election year round, big or small, but that’s a conversation for another day!) so that leaves us with the 2 big party candidates. the american government is so deeply entrenched in the foundations of israel that realistically, this is not a one election catch-all. the best we can do with this election is harm-reduction, not elimination. it is NOT ideal in any way, shape, or form, but it is a base we can develop on. trump is genuinely terrifying for the idea of democracy, and the fact that people equate that whole mess to the harris campaign, is so lacking in common sense that i genuinely had to take a breather. freedom of speech, civil liberty, and the right to protest are in the direct line of fire in this election cycle with the current rise of trumpian laws being put in front of both congress and the supreme court.
intersectionality is based on the idea that we can limit the harm to oppressed people in facing multiple oppressors, NOT having tunnel vision onto one form of oppression, because all oppressive ideologies are inherently linked. a large group of non-poc, pro-palestinian liberation supporters are not grasping the true basis of this mindset, and are actively bringing more harm to the palestinian cause by rejecting a more multi-faceted understanding of how to actually achieve liberation. there is a lack of understanding that we as americans can only support the liberation of palestine. trying to center the idea of palestine’s liberation as something that american activists can only achieve is based in the same ideology of the “white-savior” phenomenon. palestinian people have given us direct ways that they want support, and largely, american supporters have either de-stabilized or suppressed the original outreach and replaced it with more performative activism. the rampant racism, suppression, de-centralization of both black voices and palestinian voices goes directly against the beauty of palestine’s multi-ethnic, religiously diverse, and multi-faceted history as one of the most diverse areas of art, culture and thought in history.
#sooo many unfinished thoughts here#but i had to put my thoughts down#or i was going to start screaming and never stop💀#black-palestinian solidarity#and its current status#maya ayooni#tori grier#tiktok#palestine#kamala harris#2024 elections#pro palestine#i am a black + puerto rican woman btw#i don’t normally post like this#but i’m so fucking ticked off😭#racism#antiblackness#antiblackracism#misogynoir
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I have NINE more tests and procedures scheduled between now and November. NINE.
*whispers* I’m so fucking tired…
So as to avoid polluting the timeline with negativity, I’ll probably be on rest most of the time for the foreseeable future.
Unless Jikook decide to Jikook. Then someone may roust me from my cryochamber of self-pity and lethargy.
#fuck tagging#I’m in constant pain#American health care is hell#at least I get to try the Mediterranean diet#if I had the energy I’d start screaming and never stop#I’m gonna go lie flat like a beached whale and regret all my life choices#ow
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