#i still feel like absolute shit
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A hair dresser really fucked up my shit today and I’m honestly just,, awed by it?
My bangs were longer than this when I had a traditional men’s cut. I have shoulder length hair
Worstie I asked for long bangs, how’d I end up with micro bangs
#I have to make jokes or else I’ll keep crying about this#I mean I will keep crying about this for next couple of months#but maybe it’ll look less pathetic if I make jokes about it#yeah it’s just hair but fuck#I’m too traumatized for this shit#I mean#crying about it instead of genuine reactivity is a positive sign!#i still feel like absolute shit#there’s so many fucking things that upset me here#ignoring just the part where I have to avoid mirrors for three months#I can’t fucking dye my hair any more#I’m not spending that much fucking money on something I’m going to hate in a month bc my bangs are going to look like shit#which is fucking dysmorphia inducing by itself!#I kind of fucking hate my hair color rn#I was going to dye it within the month#so now I have to buy / style / and fucking deal with a wig for Halloween#(yes have to. I can only take so many blows to my ego)#I. fuck.#there were more coherent points in here but I just#I have so little but ego#I’m a wounded bleeding creature and the shitty fucking bandage that is my ego is the only fucking thing keeping me stable#and as off late I’ve been bleeding through that bandage. this. this is only making it fucking worse#I’m not going to kill myself.#at the end of the day I am a spitful and angry creature. wrath will keep me going when nothing else will#but I’m so thin#and there’s so little of me to loose to that wrath#I#fuck#gods what is it like to be normal#to not have a fucking bad haircut bring you to your fucking knees
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I so badly wanna just be left alone and stay in my room
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Guys. Guys they’re miners. They’re tiny cogless miners. Guys
I blacked out and filled the whole three canvases with sketches of them being itty bitty goobers. Figured Imma show you some haha
#maccadam#transformers#prowl#jazz#tf one#transformers one#tf one jazz#tf one prowl#jazzprowl#<- if you want it to be haha#I can’t stop thinking#like#I check ao3 very regularly and#okay bruh just. I know the movie absolutely wasnt about Jazz nor Prowl but I still feel the urge to write something about them#just like. slice of life thing but considering their life is kinda sucks because of the whole no-cog thing#Jazz talks smth like twice for the whole movie and Prowl doesn’t talk at all. That’s a lot of creative freedom to write haha#I want them to do their classic stealth missions type of shit but this time without any actual support from any kind of system#you get me#they both usually have some kind of command structure behind them. I want them to be absolutely broke low class tiny goobers#and still manage to pull their usual shady crazy stuff#idk#something like that
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Bit of a weird question, but what is your overall least favorite thing about MLP? 
Sparity.
#magicalgrimm#ask me#there’s a later season episode (post spike getting wings) that Tulli and I could not finish because it was so awful#where rarity’s feeling lonely without spike who’s grown up and moved on from his crush on her#so she gets extremely clingy and manipulatey to get this. teenage boy to pay attention and worship her again#and rarity gets visibly jealous of spike spending time with another teenage dragon girl#it’s extremely extremely creepy. by FAR rarity’s absolute worst rock bottom moment#actual textbook groomer behavior#and even worse the episode kinda shits on rarijack where rarity tried to replace spike with applejack in helping her#but aj fails and fucks things up and isn’t right for the job. so the episode implies spike is a better match with rarity than applejack#it’s just all sorts of wrong eugh.#sparity just sucks so bad I can’t believe a good chunk of bronies still ship them or consider them a viable ship#I’m fine with spike having a kid crush on rarity it happens with kids#but the more the writers just kept teasing and toying and baiting it. overstayed its welcome#especially because they have no chemistry. spike doesn’t have a reason for liking rarity other than “hot woman in her mid-20s’
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Happy thong Thursday hope your doing well
not a thong but my dog destroyed one of my favourite undies and i refuse to get rid of them
#sorry it’s green and ugly#it’s the temp reader colour on my space heater 🤣#and i didnt feel like editing it 🙏🏻#my day is honestly shit and it’s not even 5.30am#but i got a good 10minute straight hug this morning#and honestly it did absolute fucking wonders#still wanna die tho 🤓#🌙#🍑
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Ghost Cora AU where he’s actually been following Law around ever since he died but nobody has been able to see him, so all he’s able to do is watch Law get hurt and suffer in silence. UNTIL, miraculously, the battle of Dressrosa ends, and for some strange reason—through some supernatural bullshit or maybe just fate—one person is finally able to see him.
Law is sitting on the deck of the Yonta Maria watching everyone party when Luffy comes trotting over to him. And Luffy plops down beside him and says, “I’ve been meaning to ask, Torao, but who’s that really tall blonde guy with the funny makeup that’s been following you around?”
And Law’s just like
#Meanwhile Cora is absolutely THRILLED. LMAO#Eventually Zoro calls Perona over and since her devil fruit power deals with ghosts. She makes it so that Law can see Cora too#(And by some bs he’ll probably be brought back to life somehow idk)#One Piece#Trafalgar Law#Donquixote Rosinante#Cora#Corazon#Luffy#Law: Ha. Haha.#Law: You’re shitting me right.#Luffy: ??? What? No?#Cora: LAWWWWWW 😭😭😭#Luffy: He’s crying your name this guy CLEARLY knows you Torao#Law; having a mental breakdown: Uh. Uh-huh???#Shima speaks#Sorry I’m coping. I’m coping really hard rn#Actually. I feel like I was more upset about Cora’s death than Ace’s. WHICH LIKE. YOU’D THINK IT WOULD BE THE OTHER WAY AROUND BUT#I’m very. Very weak for the unsuspecting father figure who dies trope#(Sideeyes Tony and Harry (who didn’t even die anyway but it was still Traumatic for Eggsy to watch))#COUGHS
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My favorite brand of Ratiorine is definitely:
"They both experienced immediate attraction upon seeing the other and are (silently) interested in the possibility of pursuing a relationship, regardless of their differences and the difficulties of their situations."
But also:
"Despite being two of the most hyper-competent people in the universe, they are absolutely idiot4idiot when it comes to romance or discussing their feelings, and they are about to make their complete inability to express themselves and court like normal people into everybody's problem."
#honkai star rail#ratiorine#aventio#dr. ratio x aventurine#I just love the idea that Ratiorine might be the one ship where#BOTH parties were like “Oh no he's gorgeous”#BOTH thinking “I could spend the rest of my life with this person”#zero back-and-forth “Do I really like him? Maybe I'm just confused--”#nope just right from the start “Oh I'm in trouble”#but STILL#not able to get their shit together#still just completely unable to SPIT IT OUT#absolute chaos and drama#ridiculous hijinks#all over a relationship they both desperately want to be in#🤣🤣🤣#and like#it's one of those#“Everyone can see it”#so everyone else in the known universe is watching like#“Should we maybe help them???”#but there's no saving this#theyre both just going to have to put their big boy pants on#and *shudder* discuss their feelings
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Please excuse my attempt at being funny
#transformers animated#tfa#tfa optimus prime#tfa sentinel prime#tfa elita one#alpha trion#sparkling siblings au#after draiwng so much I’m starting to crash#but here have a shitty comic of alpha trion accidentally creating a nuke#and his kids being absolutely terrified of it#like they see him adding random ass shit to the pan and they brace for impact#you’d think after 6 billion stellar cycles alpha learns how to cook#very cheesy but I wanted to get this out of my system#and maybe I’ll draw more adult sibling content#still practicing how to draw better more Tfa looking#as you can see from my op it’s not looking so good#but I just have to keep working#tq tq for the support as much as I feel like trash I’m glad others don’t#I hope at least#maccadam
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Steve Rogers in Avengers: Endgame (2019)
#steve rogers#steverogersedit#evansedit#marveledit#marveldaily#marvelgifs#mcuedit#dailyteamcap#capedit#userelysia#this scene still makes me feel so many things 4 years later#to me he's as brave as they get but it's not because he really has no fears at all#it's because he just does it scared#one of the reasons i am so happy chris evans played steve rogers is because i feel like he really understands him and respects him#he said in his actors on actors interview that he understands what it's like to have a fictional character who's your whole world#and means a lot to you and really inspires you#and that's steve rogers for so many people 🥺#i give the russos sooo much shit (AS I VERY WELL SHOULD) for not understanding steve's character but they ate this one little thing#when they had him grit his teeth and get back up and tighten the strap on his shield and face off an entire alien army alone#the moment he picks up mjolnir is an absolute fan favourite but i think it has some competition for the best steve scene in endgame#this is a crowning moment#*
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alright tumblr hiatus over i want to be perceived by a better platform again
#kakitalk#kakiart#listen i tried moving but nothing feels like its got gas and twitter is still shit#i want to read tags on my art again :(#i'll absolutely go back to actually putting my art up here if people would like to see it!#something about the tumblr experience that just cant be beat im afraid it calls to me
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Odysseus was afraid the entire year on Aeaea in the Odyssey.
Content warnings: Rape, Sexual Coercion, Sexual assault, Sex Work, power dynamics, this will also be long as fuck as I talk too much. This is NOT a "Circe the Goddess Hate Post". I call her out but that's it. I tried to keep this neutral but still making a point (Let me know if I gotta put more)
Lots of lovely folks on here have written great essays on what Calypso did to Odysseus as it's soooo blatantly obvious there. It literally states how he cried every day and how he flinched from Calypso, very straightforward on how he was explicitly raped.
But I've noticed that a lot of people are always iffy about Circe's situation (understandably so, it's not so in your face.) She's usually always mentioned in the "Odysseus never cheated! He was raped!" posts but then the evidence is only ever given against Calypso, and then mentioning how you can't say no or disobey the orders of an immortal and how it was in exchange for freeing his men.
WHICH IS ALL CORRECT!!! But!!!
There ARE immortal/mortal couples who genuinely love each other. Dionysus and Ariadne, and Eros and Psyche are examples. Apollo and Hyacinthus. Psyche indeed becomes immortal eventually and in some versions, both Hyacinthus and Ariadne do too. But even while mortal themselves, their immortal lovers still remained respectful and loving towards them and definitely doted on them. There are definitely power dynamics at play here but there's some nuance.
Odysseus and Circe's relationship, however, is very different. We all know he slept with her at the very least once. And that was in exchange for his men being returned to humans. That was the only time it was explicitly stated. With Calypso, it tells you every night he was enchanted and slept beside her. It was the narrator speaking but Odysseus is the narrator now and it's his story. If you think he lied, this probably won't change your mind anyway.
But even if it was a one-time thing, (which isn't the only interpretation and I will have points that talk about others) then why did he stay a year? What was he doing?
I'm doing a deep dive into the year he spent on Aeaea based on evidence in Book 10 and then the beginning of Book 12. Step by step, and honestly I'm writing this for Tumblr, not as a thesis so I will be a bit more casual but still using sources. To me, it's very obvious that he was uncomfortable throughout the text simply based on the language that is used. But it's very subtle and not an outright statement of "He's been crying every day."
BTW, just so we're clear, this is not a "Circe is the root of all evil, etc." type of post.
This isn't meant to villainize her. She's an immortal being and in mythology that changes things. Everybody is morally gray. I genuinely think if we were to ask her feelings on it, she'd probably be like "Oh, yeah! Turned his men into pigs! Strange little man he was." I don't think she gave a flying fuck.
I just simply get pissed tf off when people think Odysseus was fine. It honestly disturbs me how often I'll go on other websites YouTube and see everyone call him a whore and a womanizer. It's sexism at its finest because 1.) "MaN AlwAyS wAnTs sEx" and 2.) women can't rape/coerce. THIS IS SIMPLY TO LOOK INTO HIS FEELINGS ABOUT IT.
This is also only for Homer's Odyssey, using different translations. If you want to discuss this, (I'd be happy to! Just be nice!) DON'T BRING UP ANY OTHER WORKS.
With all that out of the way, come yell with me 🤗
I've read multiple translations, as I know there's going to be bias depending on who's translating. And having done so, each one has basically the same situations described the same so that's nice for consistency. Also, there are some parts in the story that are vague and that we'll never have answers to.
Odysseus first simply sees the smoke from her chimney and then sends his men in, after drawing lots Eurylochus leads half of the men to check out the house. I mentioned here vaguely how the 2 immortals he sleeps with are both introduced while singing and weaving, which could be seen as an enchantment (which to me is most likely. They both possess magic and are goddesses). So I'm just gonna move past that. Just take a peek and come back or just know that enchantment was likely.
Next, I'll see people often joke on Tumblr about how
"Odysseus says that Polites is his best friend yet only mentions him once!"
I think Odysseus mentions his best friend, the one to jubilantly go in first, to show WHY he would go through with this. How much these comrades mean to him. That's his best friend, and there are approximately 20 others who are now pigs as well. Could you knowingly leave one of your best friends to live a life like that knowing you could've done something?
[...]Circe—and deep inside they heard her singing, lifting her spellbinding voice as she glided back and forth at her great immortal loom, her enchanting web a shimmering glory only goddesses can weave. Polites, captain of armies, took command, the closest, most devoted man I had: ‘Friends, there’s someone inside, plying a great loom, and how she sings—enthralling! The whole house is echoing to her song. Goddess or woman—let’s call out to her now!’ So he urged and the men called out and hailed her. She opened her gleaming doors at once and stepped forth, inviting them all in, and in they went, all innocence.
(Fagles, Book 10)
In the Odyssey, it's never mentioned why she turns people into animals. I think they were turned into pigs because, throughout the Iliad and Odyssey, Odysseus is often associated with boars. His men are associated with him, therefore: 🐖 Piggy. From what we know, the lads were just eating her food. With how much Xenia and hospitality are a large part of the story, they probably thought they were safe. They were GUESTS. This is especially welcome after the Cyclops and the Laestrygonians. And it literally says "All innocence". They were simply naive.
Then Eurylochus runs back, so terrified that he couldn't speak at first. He then begs Odysseus to just leave the men behind. Odysseus has shown that he does TRY to save his men when it is truly not reckless to do so.
But I shot back, ‘Eurylochus, stay right here, eating, drinking, safe by the black ship. I must be off. Necessity drives me on.’
(Fagles, Book 10)
Then the famous warning from Hermes. I've seen folks bring this up when talking about this. YES, he is literally commanded by Hermes to not refuse her if he wants his men back in basically every translation. It sounds like Circe was warned as well. When? We don't know, but it sounds like Hermes didn't pick "sides" here.
Strange that he was still like, "Sleep with each other" to both, because he could've been like, "Circe, there's this guy named Odysseus. When he comes to this island, change his men back." But who knows, maybe it was Circe's idea from the beginning and Hermes went along with it. Just food for thought.
Now here’s your plan of action, step by step. The moment Circe strikes with her long thin wand, you draw your sharp sword sheathed at your hip and rush her fast as if to run her through! She’ll cower in fear and coax you to her bed— but don’t refuse the goddess’ bed, not then, not if she’s to release your friends and treat you well yourself. But have her swear the binding oath of the blessed gods she’ll never plot some new intrigue to harm you, once you lie there naked— never unman you, strip away your courage!’
(Fagles, Book 10)
But that doesn't explain why he was there for a year afterward! Nor if he himself was okay with it, which is what I'm trying to delve into as he wasn't.
Also the knife thing? She's still immortal. It was meant to startle her. Her dad is Helios. Odysseus would've been toast, literally.
Also note this exchange wasn't a "Yippee! Hermes says I'm going to get laid!".
...just approaching the halls of Circe, my heart a heaving storm at every step, paused at her doors, the nymph with lovely braids— I stood and shouted to her there. She heard my voice, she opened the gleaming doors at once and stepped forth, inviting me in, and in I went, all anguish now …
(Fagles, Book 10)
Another translation by Ian Johnston, (they all say the same thing essentially but trying to make a point.)
I continued on to Circe’s home. As I moved on, my heart was turning over many gloomy thoughts. After I had walked up to the gateway of fair-haired Circe’s house, I just stood there and gave a shout. The goddess heard my voice. She came out at once, opened her bright doors, and invited me inside. I entered, heart full of misgivings.
HE👏WAS👏SCARED! The tone is solemn and suspenseful. He was just told that without Hermes' help with the root, he wouldn't be able to survive and bring back his men. Circe was dangerous.
He made her swear not to harm him.
Straightaway she began to swear the oath that I required—never, she’d never do me harm—and when she’d finished, then, at last, I mounted Circe’s gorgeous bed …
(Fagles, Book 10)
Please note that she NEVER promised that to his men. His comrades did NOT have moli in their systems. He had no way of truly ensuring their safety in any way from Circe.
He then refuses to eat or speak, literally "lost in grim forebodings". If he "just got laid", then why isn't he happy? Not many men can say that a goddess CHOSE to have sex with them. He did it to get his men turned back. It was an exchange. I don't think Circe is "Evil" so maybe it slipped her mind. Or yes, she could've thought, "Hey, I got what I wanted. He's handsome enough. Homer never shuts up about how hot this guy is He hasn't brought up the pigs yet. I'll just let this play out. Maybe HE forgot. I don't have to do anything." We don't know. But Odysseus probably felt like he got deceived.
"Hey, I did my part of the deal. I slept with you. Now do yours."
She pressed me to eat. I had no taste for food. I just sat there, mind wandering, far away … lost in grim forebodings. As soon as Circe saw me, huddled, not touching my food, immersed in sorrow, she sidled near with a coaxing, winged word: ‘Odysseus, why just sit there, struck dumb, eating your heart out, not touching food or drink? Suspect me of still more treachery? Nothing to fear. Haven’t I just sworn my solemn, binding oath?’
So she asked, but I protested, ‘Circe— how could any man in his right mind endure the taste of food and drink before he’d freed his comrades-in-arms and looked them in the eyes? If you, you really want me to eat and drink, set them free, all my beloved comrades— let me feast my eyes.’ So I demanded.
(Fagles, Book 10)
He doesn't trust her despite what she had told him that he should when they sleep together. He has figured out that while she will not hurt him, his men were not a part of that oath, the men he was trying to protect in the first place.
She is then moved by how they rejoice when they see one another again. While turning people into animals for funsies isn't cool and coercion is fucked up, I think she comes to see this group as not quite friends but I think she did find them entertaining in a way.
This is very strange but I've seen some folks say that since Odysseus was pissed at Eurylochus for still not believing him about Circe is proof that "Oh he was trying to defend her!". Which??? Uh, Eurylochus was literally questioning his leadership as a whole. Calling him reckless and shit. He is captain and he's the King, he can't let that shit slide. The text literally says "Mutinous". Also if I had to sleep with someone I did not want to especially if it was to save my friends and I got called names afterward I'd get fucking pissed too.
Only Eurylochus tried to hold my shipmates back, his mutinous outburst aimed at one and all: ‘Poor fools, where are we running now? Why are we tempting fate?— why stumble blindly down to Circe’s halls? She’ll turn us all into pigs or wolves or lions made to guard that palace of hers—by force, I tell you— just as the Cyclops trapped our comrades in his lair with hotheaded Odysseus right beside them all— thanks to this man’s rashness they died too!
They stay a year. Again it's never stated that Odysseus slept with her that whole time. You could interpret that. (Honestly, I feel Circe would get bored with him? She's a goddess, she's got more important matters than mortal men. And she definitely doesn't love him.)
His men DO have to bring it up that "Odysseus has forgotten his native land." Maybe they thought they could sneak out without her knowing??? I am fucking REACHING but hold on as Telemachus did because he knew Nestor would well, be Nestor and try to coax him with "Have a meal with us! Let me tell you about how badass I used to be in my youth." But to sneak away from a goddess? Without her permission? That won't end too well. Aeolus in the beginning kicked out Odysseus when he tried to ask for another bag of wind. If she didn't want him around, she could literally boot him out. While she didn't force him to stay like Calypso did, she didn't "release" him either.
We don't know if they've been asking for a long time. Odysseus does say to Circe that they have been begging him nonstop, but he could also be saying that to try and convince her. He's good at persuasion. I think while he knew he could rely on her for food, shelter, and good advice, he still didn't feel...SAFE with her. I think he was possibly avoiding her personally.
I think HOW he asks her to leave is important to know as well.
...but I went up to that luxurious bed of Circe’s, hugged her by the knees and the goddess heard my winging supplication: ‘Circe, now make good a promise you gave me once— it’s time to help me home. My heart longs to be home, my comrades’ hearts as well. They wear me down, pleading with me whenever you’re away.’
(Fagles, Book 10)
Throughout all of Homer's works, the characters grasp another's knees when they are desperate and are literally at the other person's mercy. Priam did when begging Achilles for Hector's body back. The man who literally killed his son and was defiling his body by dragging it around. Leodes grabs Odysseus' knees to beg for his life before Ody kills him. If he saw her as a friend, and not a captor, WHY DID HE FEEL THE NEED TO BEG IN ORDER TO LEAVE?! No one, who is in a healthy relationship, has to BEG for permission to leave. Or to "Break up", if you interpret them as still sleeping together.
And even Circe acknowledges that he is there against his will!
‘Royal son of Laertes, Odysseus, old campaigner, stay on no more in my house against your will.
(Fagles, Book 10)
[...]Odysseus, man of many resources, scion of Zeus, son of Laertes, don’t stay here a moment longer against your will
(A.S. Kline, Book 10)
This is probably another reach that you can ignore but the whole "they wear me down", could be trying to appease her. "Look, you're REALLY cool, it's actually my crew that wants to leave hahahah please don't kill them"
I mentioned before how Telemachus snuck away from Nestor but that was simply out of necessity because he needed to go home now. Not rest for the night. NOW. Nestor is just everyone's grandpa. Menelaus kind of talked more but Telemachus is very straight up in "Please I have to go now" and Menelaus immediately got things ready for him. He never has to beg and clasp his knees. Telemachus was never afraid. Menelaus is a fun uncle and Helen is your cool auntie.
Back to Circe! She tells him instructions for the underworld, they were in her bedroom. But that might've been the only way to speak with her. As even Penelope is usually away from the suitors when they are in her halls, Circe may have done the same. The text never states she played hostess physically. If she was hosting in the halls during the day, why did Odysseus wait until night to talk to her? He could've just asked her while she was on her throne in front of everyone. (He did so with the Phaeacians)
Or maybe he went alone because she only swore an oath to not harm him and so he didn't want his men near if she decided she didn't want to let them go. I could be missing something here so feel free to say something. Idk if this was a pride thing on how "I don't want others to see me beg".
She has info he needs in order to go home as well. She tells him to go to the Underworld.
She gave him new fine clothes and put on pretty clothes herself but that doesn't mean they had sex. Nausicaa gave him nice clothes as well but he never slept with her.
Then he leaves. Immediately. Not even doing a headcount as he didn't realize one of his men had died. (That was negligence on his part but he wanted out) He booked it, to the UNDERWORLD BY THE WAY. Circe even had to sneak the animals he needed for the sacrifice. Odysseus even basically said "She's a goddess. She can do things mortals can't" at the end of the book. And it almost feels...Numb? Solemn? Neutral? Gives a "It is what it is" vibe.
But Circe got to the dark hull before us, tethered a ram and black ewe close by— slipping past unseen. Who can glimpse a god who wants to be invisible gliding here and there?
(Fagles, Book 10)
She’d slipped past us with ease, for who can see a god move back and forth, if she has no desire to be observed?
(Johnston, Book 10)
She's a goddess. She has magic. She can do whatever the fuck she wants.
NOW ON TO BOOK 12!!! That was long! GET A SNACK AND WATER! LUCKILY THIS'LL BE SHORTER!
In Book 11, Odysseus swears, upon all his loved ones in Ithaca, to Elpenor that he'd give him a proper burial as he's been "unwept, unburied". So in Book 12, he sails back to Aeaea to fulfill his promise.
But you know what's funny to me?
He didn't tell Circe he was there.
He didn't even go to greet Circe himself. He sent his men to go get Elpenor's body.
The biggest clue that he didn't love/trust her is that if she was his "Affair partner" then why not go see her for "one last night together"?
SHE came out herself and pulled him aside to know what happened and then gave more advice.
I dispatched some men to Circe’s halls to bring the dead Elpenor’s body. [...]
Nor did our coming back from Death escape Circe— she hurried toward us, decked in rich regalia, handmaids following close with trays of bread and meats galore and glinting ruddy wine. [...]
But Circe, taking me by the hand, drew me away from all my shipmates there and sat me down and lying beside me probed me for details
(Fagles, Book 12)
In every translation, it talks about how he sits, and she lounges/lies down. That's not sex 🙃 In some translations, it even says he tried to be with his shipmates but she pulled him away!
So we lay down and slept beside our ship’s stern cables. But Circe took me by the hand and led me away, some distance from the crew. She made me sit, while she stretched out beside me on the ground.
(Johnston, Book 12)
Then, she gives advice about the sirens, Charybdis, Scylla, and her father's Cattle. He tries to ask if he could save all his men. She scolds him for even thinking he could try. He again books it out of there.
I think we all know it wasn't "love". But I think a lot of people think Odysseus was willing and happy with whatever this was. "Friends with Benefits", if you will. I guess you could see it that way but I will say that makes me feel itchy with the whole power dynamic and fear. I don't think folks who have that arrangement have to beg on their knees to ask if they can leave though.
I mean the entirety of Book 10 gives me the vibes of "Laughing uncomfortably because you don't want to upset the other person". To just grin and bear it.
A lot of this was just putting the text here and picking it apart step by step. What you do with this is up to you. It's rambling while banging pots and pans together.
Maybe you see him as drugged the entire year and still sleeping together, as the moli "wore off". Even then, just because her magic can't affect him, there are plenty of natural concoctions that can be created that can affect mortals.
Maybe you see the entire year as sex work in exchange for shelter and food.
Maybe he was just alongside his men the whole time under her roof and was avoiding her after the exchange. After he got asked by his men to finally leave, he would start to walk up to that room only to freeze and turn around, thinking "One more day won't hurt. Should wait until I know she's in a sympathetic mood".
I beg of you, however, PLEASE understand that there was fear and coercion throughout his entirety on Aeaea. He wasn't staying to get laid. While there is so much going on and too many things that are left vague to really know exactly what happened, it is consistent that he was scared/numb. Lots of people go through with things they don't really want to do just to appease others. There are plenty of situations of sexual trauma where one person goes through something and the other has no idea the other person isn't okay. ESPECIALLY WHEN SOMEONE CAN HARM THE PEOPLE YOU CARE ABOUT AT ANY MOMENT!
Sexual trauma is a very complicated thing and while he was scared, he definitely wasn't as traumatized by her as he was by Calypso. Calypso was a torturous hell while Circe was a year of walking on eggshells. Not comparable but I still think it should be acknowledged. It's wild because I read the Odyssey and kept thinking "Y'all are calling the sex slave a cheater? The guy who slept with a goddess to get his men back? The ultimate simp apparently doesn't love his wife??"
Things I'm adding that shouldn't affect the argument as it is not in the Odyssey but I want to mention as it's a "fun fact": Odysseus' dad was an Argonaut. Laertes probably met Circe as well, (or knew of her) with the whole purifying thing and maybe Odysseus heard his dad tell stories of her. Later myths also have Circe with the habit of turning her crushes (or their lovers) into something with Scylla and Picus.
In conclusion, Yeah, he was afraid of her. At least to an extent. And don't pull the whole "Ancient men didn't get raped". Male victims exist and deserve compassion for what was done to them and women are capable of sexual abuse. If you think otherwise, you are not a true feminist and Fuck you. I said in the beginning this'll be casual and I don't wanna write a fancy ending. You can still think Circe is neat but you have to know that this was fucked up.
If you think a lot of this is bullshit or wanna give more context or wish to yell with me but still know he wasn't alright on Aeaea, cool. If you want to point out mistakes or something I should keep in mind with interpretations then feel free to say so but give text evidence. If you try and bring up the Telegony and/or Madeline Miller's Circe, fuck clean off. This is Homer. If you call Odysseus a whore and not the malewife he canonically is I'll start biting. 😤
#feel free to add thoughts! just be nice#Was a bit afraid to post this but now I don't care lol#I'm a tired bitch#Youtube and idiots on tumblr got me acting up.#This may be too thorough but idc.#idk why the colors get weird#I don't know how other people can see all these things lined up together and not see how he was not okay.#like I said you can still like circe the goddess but know this was wrong!#might make private sometime but fuck it#Circe the goddess is “fine”. Circe the book is not#It sounds like it does her dirty anyways. Odyssey Circe would take book Circe out back and beat the absolute shit outta her.#if you bring up the tele-GONE-y then BEGONE yourself#odysseus#the odyssey#odyssey#circe#tagamemnon#tw rape#tw sa#tw sex assault#crying shaking throwing up#greek mythology#circe rant#odyssey rant#anti madeline miller#anti circe#the BOOK#Mad rambles#anti-madeline miller#essay
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reassassination swap AU... fuckin.... unassassination idfk
#zeno's art#ocs#reassassination#vivica de la crux#octavia krankenstein#dr rigor krankenstein#lunette strikewhite#WEEE this one is fun#vivi is obv swapped with octavia#so she's less skittish and crazy and eager to please and more calm . still judgy as fuck tho#octavia is swapped with kranken so instead of being cool and badass she's got several screws loose#triesto seem calm and collected but really shes obsessive n overworked and unstable and a littttle bit of a total freakazoid#kranken is swapped with .... idk. lets just say the krankenstein clinic takes the role of the clear crucifix org#like instead of a clinic its a whole hospital now where kranken does crazy experiments and shit and isn't questioned cuz hes so respected#i think he was prob like canon krank before lobotomising himself so now hes just scarily quiet and soulless#but still a sadist lol#like hurting others is the only way he can feel any emotion now#lunette is swapped with umm ONCE AGAIN IDK!!! oh well. her cult replaces the clinic here#her personality is the most similar to canon shes just a bit more desperate and a little insecure#for other characters - onion is like ummm idk a wannabe scientist#if octavia is kranken's apprentice onion is octavia's#hmm idk#but i love this AU#in fact ive had it for a while i just never posted about it i dont think#but redesigning everyone was fun esp vivica's outfit its my absolute fave
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AWWWW SHIIIT is that HOMESTUCK GEM FUSION DESIGNS???
#homestuck#steven universe#gemstuck#davesolkat#davekat#solkat#davesol#i'm absolutely bonkers about these guys#still tweaking designs and i also have no idea what the fuck their fused gem names are#i just draw here idk SHIT abt geology#i call the davekat one red basalt tho#i just like the name <33#chris doodles#please feel free to ask me about these fucks if u want#also these arent to actual scale#i think the DSK fusion would be the size of alexandrite#idk abt the others im still thinking
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thinking about this one Superbat fic I read where they had to fake date or whatever but in it while they’re still in pre- relationship, they like fall asleep in the same bed, play games with their kids, and like shower while the other one is also in the bathroom and it’s like “oh yeah they’ve dealt with shit from crying into the others shoulder to literally trying to fuck each other during sex pollen episodes; there’s no world where they’re not the epitome of comfortable with each other even if they don’t think the other one returns their romantic feelings” and I just have to say I agree and I think about that hc at least once a week
#Even in the regular canon continuum most of that shit is still canon and it would make sense that they’d have that mindset ab it lol#I’m bad at explaining my thought process#married#wtv#in love#but just like they’re best friends and romantic relationship#literally whatever#There’s just no world where they’re not comfortable with each other in any and all states of being because they can accept each other as#Bat and supes#Bruce and Clark#Mr Wayne and Mr kent#Vulnerable or putting on a mask#And also I just love the hc that they’ve absolutely made out a couple of times and even more and despite it not making them realize their#Feelings are returned#it did make them closer after a week of Clark being like super awkward about it#superbat#superbat fic#superman#batman#bruce wayne#clark kent
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variations on dust
trying to get back into drawing after artfight, so have some random doodles in the meantime
#liem art#my art#dusttale#dust sans#random doodles#bottom right is usually how i draw him#bottom left is from a few refs mashed into one#well they all are really but this one was more heavily referenced#i kinda have a weird relationship with his eye color#like cyan is canon and looks better but patience just doesnt fit the version of him i have in my head#blue is like... i think dust thinks he has integrity but really its complicated#depends on how i feel about him that day#purple (aka perseverance) is i think the one trait he has for sure#but it looks like shit next to red :(#gonna have to make a choice sooner or later but rn im not doing that#also in my head he absolutely is wearing paps' scarf all the time but for some reason i always forget other people draw him without it#its like everytime i look for references i go “but where's his scarf :(” like a dumbass#but i still think he would never take it off ever unless he absolutely has to
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Redraw of the Boys (tm) from the new movie poster
#In hindsight I kinda wish I hadn't colorpicked right from the poster because now it feels like a bad knockoff#But I still like the end result#Am I going to draw content about Naka getting shot? Yes absolutely because holy shit#dcmk#detective conan#kogoro mouri#mouri kogoro#ginzo nakamori#nakamori ginzo#detective conan movie 27#movie 27#the million dollar pentagram#(Is it Pentagram or Signpost??)
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