#lots to clip here too

[cementcornfield]

ja'marr's presser notes:

he was fidgety as hell throughout it, lots of fingers tapping by the mic lol

said he would sign tee himself if he could, wants to play with him for "eternity"

said that he "didn't want" to do the donut thing, that "some simpsons guy" asked him to. (yes. your face was clearly one where you weren't enjoying any part of that! okay!)

said that joe smashed his donut in his face harder, "went too far" lmao

talked about how much it means to him to be there for kids with cancer, talked about how he was with his grandmother who he lost to cancer in her "literal last seconds" 🥺 said it "touches his heart"

[royalarchivist]

I love the QSMP. Not only has it introduced me to many amazing international creators, it's also introduced me to the French and Brazilian community, who are so sweet, funny, and chaotic in their own unique ways. I love seeing fans sharing their culture and learning from one another, and I myself have learned a lot this past year. I think it's incredible how QSMP brings so many different people together – all of us united in our love and passion for this project and its goals.

But passion can often evoke strong emotions, and these strong emotions aren't always positive.

The past few months, I have seen multiple waves of hate, bad-faith generalizations of communities, and racist remarks directed at fellow fans – especially those who are part of the French / Brazilian community. This kind of behavior is inexcusable, and is in direct conflict with the mission of QSMP, which is to break language barriers and unite communities.

We are a global community with a variety of people from different backgrounds. Miscommunications may occasionally occur because of cultural differences and/or language barriers, but we should use these moments as opportunities to learn and engage with other people rather than assuming the worst about them and starting fights.

Although certain issues can be resolved with communication, sometimes it’s better to block and move on. Avoid spreading negativity or hate, and save yourself the headache of interacting with people who are just looking for someone to argue with.

No matter what community we're a part of or what languages we speak, we're all here to have fun. Please remember to be kind to each other. We have more in common than we have in conflict.

[uhbasicallyjustmilex]

(full interview here)

[buglaur-cc]

cillian set

harrington jacket: 3 swatches, 4.1k polys

sweater vest: 3 swatches, 4k polys

vest and jacket: 5 swatches, 4.6k polys

flat cap: 16 swatches (credit to fableroot), 2.6k polys

tou: no paywalls or ads, do whatever you want :) if you find issues shoot me an ask on my main blog @buglaur, not this one!!

download simsfileshare (merged or separated) 

[rynli]

me: I should write the one-shot that lives in my head about Harry applying for a job

brain: you will write a whole casefic about Harry realizing being a cop already killed him once, acab applies even to Kim, and he needs to quit if he wants to get better

[humanmorph]

this scene makes me feel like i hit my head really hard

transcript by Iris (sacredwhim)

Jack: I did think that another major problem that we don’t need to get into unless we are compelled to is that Gucci Garantine has some news for Brnine, I think.

Austin: Oh, that’s true.

Ali: [chuckling] Oh, sure.

Austin: Yeah! I mean, does that news—

Janine: [singsong] She’s engaged!

[Austin laughs] [Jack chuckles]

Sylvi: Oh my god.

Austin: She’s engaged with another mission, yeah, uh-huh. She has another engagement to deal with, yeah.

[Janine laughs] [Ali giggles]

Austin: Yeah, I think that that maybe comes in the middle of this—

Jack: In the middle of movie night?

Austin: [cross] In the middle of movie night. Gucci doesn’t know it’s movie night.

Jack: No.

Austin: Wait, did you invite Gucci to movie night?

Ali: I tend to, but.

Sylvi: Oh my god.

Austin: You tend to?

Ali: [laughs] Yeah. I have in the future. Check the transcripts.

Jack: This is a question about Gucci Garantine now. Which is, would Gucci—

Janine: Has she ever once shown up?

Jack: Oh, yeah.

Austin: That’s a great question. We’ve seen—Gucci showed up when Brnine had come back from the combustor, right?

Jack: Oh, there was that lovely scene, yeah.

Keith: Was that movie night?

Austin: Well, the—

Ali: Well, that was a hospital bed movie night. That was Thisbe gave me a laptop that I was watching movies on.

Austin: That—right. That’s exactly right. Yes, exactly.

Jack: Would Gucci deliver this news in person?

Austin: Or in emojis? I think in person.

Jack: [laughs] Witch in Glass, devil face, thumbs up, exclamation point.

Austin: [laughs] Oh… Oh, it’s chaos to have her here. Which might be right. Halfway through the first movie, you know? She lands in some sort of hover flier.

Jack: It’s like, red.

Austin: Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Cool red hover bike.

Ali: [snickers] I just had this whole scene of everybody hanging out, and in the middle of it you’re gonna be like, yeah, every character is gonna fight with each other now.

[Jack laughs]

Ali: [laughing] Do we have to?

Austin: Well, maybe it’s the end of the second—well, I get a scene.

Ali: Sure. [laughs]

Austin: [chuckles] Maybe it’s the end of the second movie where she shows up late. She shows up late. She’s at the very end, she didn’t—she came anyway.

Keith: Flashback to her saying “I’ll be there on time.”

Austin: Exactly that.

Keith: “I guarantee it.”

Austin: “I guarantee it. I wouldn’t miss it for the world.”

Ali: Well…

Keith: “I Gucci guarantee it.”

Janine: And also, it’s Brnine’s birthday.

[Ali laughs]

Keith: And also Brnine’s got a little card that they’re looking at that says “I never will hire Clem.” [laughs]

Austin: [laughing] That’s right. Oh… Gucci shows up with popcorn-flavored wine.

Keith: And wine-flavored popcorn.

Austin: [laughing] And wine-flavored popcorn.

Jack: This is from the Mirage, right?

Sylvi: She’s that Patti Harrison character from I Think You Should Leave. “I can’t watch movies without popcorn!”

Austin: “I didn’t know if I should bring a red or a white, so I brought both.”

Janine: I would try the wine-flavored popcorn. I would not try the popcorn-flavored wine.

Jack: I’d try both.

Ali: Oh, opposite. Opposite.

Keith: I feel like shitty chardonnay is already popcorn-flavored wine.

Austin: Mhm.

Austin (as Gucci): Oh, I’m sorry, did I—have I missed it?

Ali (as Brnine): No, no, come in. You kind of missed it.

Austin (as Gucci): Hey, hi everybody. Hello.

Jack (as Movie Night Attendant): Hi.

Austin (as Gucci): I haven’t met some of you, I’m Gucci. I’m the commanding officer.

Dre (as Levi): Oh, hey, yeah, we talked on the phone.

Austin (as Gucci): Right, yes, you did show up with all of the food and supplies. Thank you. Levitation, right?

Dre (as Levi): Yep.

Austin (as Gucci): Sorry, should we hit pause on the movie or should I just talk over it?

Keith (as Eclectic): Pause.

Austin (as Gucci): I appreciate it.

Ali (as Brnine): Yeah, uh-huh.

Austin: Didn’t give a thumbs up. She wouldn’t give a thumbs up, but she nods. She says,

Austin (as Gucci): I appreciate it. Can I talk to you for a second, Brnine? I brought popcorn-flavored wine and wine-flavored popcorn for everyone.

Ali (as Brnine): Um…

Austin (as Gucci): For movie night.

Ali (as Brnine): Right. If this is a work thing, can we finish the movie?

Austin (as Gucci): No, it’s not a work thing. It’s just—

Jack: I have never heard a bigger lie.

[Ali laughs]

Dre: We’ve had some doozies on this show.

Austin: Yeah. Don’t forget that this is a relationship built on lies.

[Ali laughs]

Janine: It’s a personal thing that just happens to be in the context of work.

Austin: That’s exactly right.

Dre: Mhm.

Ali (as Brnine): Um, sure, yeah. You guys can put the movie back on.

Austin (as Gucci): I’ll be right back.

Sylvi: I am not watching the movie. I am watching those two.

Austin (as Gucci): We’re just gonna step out into the…

Austin: Where is the movie night? ’Cause didn’t it used to be in Phrygian?

Ali: No, no.

Austin: Oh, it was not in Phrygian.

Sylvi: It was always a rec room.

Austin: It was just the regular room.

Ali: My funny—my quarters that I was able to add to the ship is the media center.

Sylvi: My funny quarters.

Austin: Sorry, are we gonna call it “my funny room”? My funny quarters?

[Keith and Ali laugh]

Keith: My funny little room.

Ali: It’s what I get for not having magic. I get to add a room to the—

Sylvi: Yeah. A sound system.

Jack: My Funny Valentine except it’s My Funny Room.

Austin (as Gucci): Can we just talk in…

Ali (as Brnine): Yeah, yeah. You’re here to watch the movie though, right?

Austin (as Gucci): Yeah, absolutely. Which one is it?

Ali (as Brnine): ’Cause it’s a movie night.

Austin (as Gucci): Yeah, well, I’ve seen a lot of movies, so.

Ali (as Brnine): Right. Well, they’re movies.

Austin (as Gucci): Yeah.

Keith: You can keep watching them. [laughs]

[Ali laughs]

Dre: There’s always new ones.

Austin (as Gucci): The, um… The council has need of me.

Ali (as Brnine): [cross] This is a work thing.

Austin (as Gucci): It’s not. This part isn’t. I’m gonna be busy, so I wanted you to know that I would—it would be hard to get in touch with me, probably, for a little bit. Which is not just a work thing.

Ali (as Brnine): Right. Well, yeah. Well, um, sure. I mean, I’ll talk to you, then. When I can talk to you, I mean.

Austin (as Gucci): They—from here, after movie night, I have to go to the Crown of Glass.

Ali (as Brnine): Why?

Austin (as Gucci): This Crown of Glass, not the Crown of Glass that’s—not the planet. ’Cause there’s that now.

Ali (as Brnine): What planet?

Austin (as Gucci): There’s—the Twilight Mirage—did you not get a chance to look at the files on it?

Ali (as Brnine): No, I’ve been kind of busy.

Austin (as Gucci): You don’t have to get snippy with me. We sent over a folder with information. It should have been in with the food, which we also sent you, [quietly] which I wasn’t supposed to do.

Ali (as Brnine): Mhm. No, I was gonna look at it tomorrow.

Austin (as Gucci): Do you know about Lucia? We captured Lucia. Whitestar. Lander One?

Ali (as Brnine): Oh.

Austin (as Gucci): The second in line to the throne of the Principality.

Ali (as Brnine): When did that happen? I thought we weren’t doing any engagements because of the whole frizz.

Austin (as Gucci): Well, there were assets on the move already…

Ali (as Brnine): What assets?

Austin (as Gucci): Allied assets, as it turns out. Clementine’s assets.

Ali (as Brnine): [sighs]

Austin (as Gucci): And so, in order to—you have to understand. They’re sending me because they don’t trust her, but they trust me, and I trust you, and so I know I can trust you to run the Blue Channel with me gone, and I need you to trust me to run Clementine.

Ali (as Brnine): Why are you doing that?

Austin (as Gucci): That’s a great question. It’s, um…

Ali (as Brnine): No, but you’re gonna get hurt, or like—like, she’s a bad person.

Austin (as Gucci): Clementine is a—you’re telling me that Clementine Kesh is a bad person.

Ali (as Brnine): Yes. No, like—but she is, but like—like, you know that.

Austin (as Gucci): Of course I know it. Of course I know it.

Ali (as Brnine): Then why are—what are—

Austin (as Gucci): Sometimes you have to—[frustrated stammering] sometimes—

Ali (as Brnine): Sometimes you have to work with bad people.

Austin (as Gucci): Well, sometimes you have to work with dangerous people. You—hm. I helped defend your crew when you put a Branched on it.

Ali: [laughs incredulously]

Jack: [laughing] Ooh!

Sylvi: [softly] Yo…

Jack: Woah, Gucci big swing.

Sylvi: Pass me the wine-flavored popcorn.

Janine: Not the play… [groans]

[Art laughs]

Jack: Holy shit.

Austin (as Gucci): Didn’t I? And that turned out great.

Ali (as Brnine): I’m… I’m sorry, did you, like, know that Figure died?

Austin (as Gucci): Figure died?

Ali (as Brnine): [scoffing] Oh my god. Oh my god…

Austin (as Gucci): But Figure wasn’t—Figure wasn’t Branched.

[Jack chuckles]

Ali (as Brnine): [muffled] Oh my god.

Austin (as Gucci): Is everything—are you okay?

[Ali laughs]

Austin (as Gucci): Is—are you okay? Maybe me leaving isn’t—maybe you need me here.

Ali (as Brnine): No.

Sylvi: Oh my god.

Austin (as Gucci): I’m, um… I’m sorry. I know Figure was an important part of the crew. I know Figure was loyal. There had been some doubts, but I always knew Figure was—Figure seemed loyal.

Ali (as Brnine): [seething] Yeah, Figure seemed loyal. I really think that the thing people liked the most about Figure was that they were loyal.

Austin (as Gucci): I know you’re mad, but I feel like it’s misplaced. This wasn’t my idea.

Ali: [chuckles] That’s a crazy lie. [laughs]

Art: You’re so far into this relationship to learn that Gucci sucks.

[Ali laughs]

Art: Sorry, realize?

Keith: And I think it’s Ali who…

Austin: I mean, again, the basis of their entire relationship was that back on Partizan, Brnine used to lie to Gucci to take money from her.

Ali: Uh-huh.

Austin: It’s a sandcastle all — it’s a castle built on sand.

Ali: But, you know…

Sylvi: They’re so bad for each other.

Austin: It’s a sandcastle.

Ali: I mean, Gucci got those working equipment situation. [laughs]

Austin: Uh-huh. Mhm.

Ali: Her robots were fixed.

Austin: They were.

Ali (as Brnine): I’m—I’m—I’m mad at Clem, and I’m mad at you, and I’m mad that Figure’s dead, and I’m mad that Phrygian’s dead, and I’m mad that you would, like, use that as a bargaining chip when Phrygian was, like, our best crew member. Like, we wouldn’t have even—going to the combustor was Phrygian’s idea.

Austin (as Gucci): [stammers] And it was—and it worked. It worked.

Ali (as Brnine): Oh my god, what are you doing? I—it’s movie night!

[Sylvi laughs]

Austin (as Gucci): And I have to leave after movie night. I wouldn’t have a chance to come talk to you. I have to go to the Crown of Glass and keep a leash on her. Don’t you see how hard that’s going to be? I hate her! And she was useful, and she gave us the one thing she could give us to make us even open the door, and she’s gonna hold it over me, forever. [softly] Just like she held everything over me for years, and now we have to open the door for her again.

Because we have to, because she… Do you know what sort of bargaining chip we have now if we ever leave here? We have Cynosure’s daughter. And he’s… [scoffs] He’s as sentimental as they come. He wasn’t even supposed to be Princept.

Ali (as Brnine): Why do you think we’re leaving here? Why do you care about Clem or any of that?

Austin (as Gucci): Why do I think we’re leaving here? I’m not staying in the Twilight Mirage. The whole point of this was that we shouldn’t be here. You’re staying here?

Sylvi: Oh my god!

Austin (as Gucci): With who?

[Ali laughs]

Ali (as Brnine): Do you know a way out? Because I don’t know a way out. I don’t think anybody else knows a way out. I think that we’re here now. I think that we’re in the situations that we’re in, and—

Austin (as Gucci): You’re abandoning Millennium Break.

Ali (as Brnine): What?

Austin (as Gucci): They’re out there! They’re not in here! The fight is out there. And you’re gonna stay in here for movie night?

Ali (as Brnine): I didn’t say that. I said we’re stuck.

Austin (as Gucci): You didn’t say we were “stuck” when there was the stellar combustor. You said, “I’m turning off the stellar combustor.”

Ali (as Brnine): Well, I don’t have Phrygian here anymore. And I don’t have Figure anymore—

Austin (as Gucci): [cross] Phrygian didn’t tell me that. You told me that.

Ali (as Brnine): [cross] —and now you’re gonna go to Clem.

Austin (as Gucci): I’m not “going to Clem”. I’m going to the Crown of Glass and putting a leash on Clem. I’m keeping Clem from hurting you and everyone else.

Ali (as Brnine): Great.

Austin (as Gucci): Which, yes, I can do. And no, it won’t be dangerous for me.

Ali (as Brnine): Cool.

Austin (as Gucci): I know how to deal with her.

Ali (as Brnine): I’m glad. Are you talking me into this, or are you talking you into this?

[Sylvi groans]

Ali (as Brnine): Because it feels like if we have an hour to hang out, we could sit in that room and watch a fucking movie. And not be thinking about this.

Austin (as Gucci): [cross] You’re right, you’re right. I don’t have an hour to hang out.

[Sylvi gasps]

Austin (as Gucci): And I shouldn’t be spending the time I have talking to you. Good luck, Captain. The Blue Channel’s yours.

Ali (as Brnine): Come on. Come on.

Sylvi: This is such good shit!

[Ali laughs]

Ali (as Brnine): I didn’t mean it like—

Keith: She’s busy only ever taking credit for things we do.

Austin: Uh-huh.

[Sylvi exclaims]

Austin: And she is leaving.

[Ali laughs]

Dre: Good.

[Ali groans]

[batsplat]

wait, is there a dovi/jorge feud???? i didn't know this!! also thank you so much for all you do for this community ❤️

not the only ask I've gotten about this and... look, rather than doing a proper write up that would take forever, I'm just gonna give my top ten fun... facts? bits of trivia. tidbits related to the two of them. quite long tidbits, on second glance. the highlight reel, if you will

(1) that time andrea dovizioso made 14 year old jorge lorenzo cry

the two of them already raced each other before the start of their grand prix careers, competing for the first time in 2001 in the cev when dovi was around 15 and jorge around 14. in riveras tobia's biography, here's jorge talking about their first fight:

I led the way at the start and Dovizioso and I escaped. It was our first head-to-head encounter, the first time we raced each other. My dad had heard that Dovi was a really clever rider and he warned me before the race. But just like in 1998 at Jerez, with Olive, I acted like a dummy and pushed for the whole race. I kept looking behind me to see the bastard still there! It was impossible to shake him off, he was watching me the whole race until the last lap. Three comers from the end I could hear his engine getting closer and I saw his shadow to my left, but he didn't come past. I thought to myself "This guy is going to try something in a second!" I decided I had to on a tighter line and close the door. Sure enough, Dovi went wider through that comer and then dived up the inside. I didn't close the door in time and tried to get in his slipstream, desperately hoping I could get him the next corner, but I ran wide and he won. I came back in tears, I didn't even want to go to the podium, I felt so cheated. I'd been on the limit for the whole race and I felt like I deserved the win more than he did.

so that's a nice and positive start! there's something charming about how even fifteen year old dovi was an absolute menace on last laps

also about that race:

'Jorge beat Dovi in Braga but in the previous race at Most, what a tantrum!' recalls Juanito, laughing. 'He didn't even want to go to the podium, he was crying like a baby! I can still see Dani (Antatriain) talking to him, trying to convince him. In the end he went but he didn't want to look at anybody.'

(2) the photo finish

in 2004, they were rivals in 125cc - a year in which dovi claimed the title and jorge was p4 in the standings. in the very first grand prix ever at the lusail circuit (pretty eventful weekend, you have to say), jorge and dovi crossed the line at the exact same moment

(3) dovi's top three favourite career win

dovi and jorge progressed through the categories at the exact same rate, and after their 125cc rivalry they continued fighting in 250cc. they were title rivals in both 2006 and 2007, with jorge's aprilia winning out both times against dovi's underpowered honda. (the general pattern was that dovi clawed back a bunch of points from jorge in the wet - jorge, with perhaps the exception of a few years in the premier class until around 2013, has never been much of a wet weather racers, while it's always been one of dovi's strongest traits.) for dovi's 300th career start in 2019, he was asked what his top three wins were - and one of his picks was from way back when in 2007

I'd recommend the race! which... well, I did in the race rec post - and I can only reiterate that these two kids do not acknowledge each other, not good vibes at all

(4) jorge's thoughts on young dovi from 2008

Jorge has a lot of respect for Andrea Dovizioso and feels that his two 250cc world titles have even more prestige because he had to beat the Italian to win them. 'You wouldn't label Dovizioso as fast, particularly, but he's much faster than he looks. He doesn't set many pole positions but he is always up front in a race, fighting to win. He is very intelligent and you can't trust him an inch on the last lap. He has been faithful to Honda, he has great belief in them. His negative side is that he tends to play the victim too much. He'll say that if his bike had a better engine or if it was a bit faster he would win. He's even said that if he was on the same bike as me he'd give me a hiding. I think he looks for excuses too often sometimes, but as a rider and a person I don't have a bad word to say about him.'

some dovi traits read as very familiar, from how he's a better racer than qualifier to the intelligence to the last lap prowess. as for jorge saying dovi plays victim too much? well

also this:

ER: Don't you think that Dovizioso wanted to be World Champion too in 2006 and 2007? Don't you think he gave everything to achieve it? JL: He will think he gave his maximum but he will be lying to himself because nobody does that. Nobody gets close to their maximum, not even me. He will think that he didn't win because he was riding a Honda. There are very few sportsmen who will say, I deserve what happened to me and there are no excuses. I didn't know how to do any better and I've done things wrong.' That is the only way to be the best, the only way. People who make excuses don't get to the top. I know riders who haven't made it for just that reason.

plus ça change

(5) jorge's thoughts on young dovi from 2018

when they were doing their thing as ducati teammates (bickering), here is one of the things jorge said about dovi:

dovi's been trying to undermine jorge's morale his WHOLE career... even when they were but teenagers... love it when you can really tell someone's been sitting on something for over a decade

(6) "also lorenzo is not my friend"

both of them moved up to motogp in 2008, jorge with factory yamaha and dovi with satellite honda. dovi had a very strong rookie season and finished in p5, only sixteen points behind jorge in p4 (who after a promising first few races had spent a lot of time that season crashing). after that, their fortunes diverged. dovi did not have a particularly happy time in the factory honda team and needed to do some shrewd negotiating to be retained by them for 2011 in that three-man squad, while jorge of course won the championship in 2010

here's a deep cut from 2011, a season where much of the excitement and drama was caused by marco simoncelli alone. jorge had exchanged tense words with sic in estoril, one race before simoncelli was responsible for a crash where dani broke his collarbone. the crash and sic's subsequent penalty meant that the three-way fight between jorge, dovi and valentino became one for the podium, with dovi and valentino eventually grabbing the two remaining spots behind casey. but during the race, jorge had executed a... questionable manoeuvre on dovi, one that did have some similarities to the sic/dani incident. given jorge's strong previous comments on racing standards, unsurprisingly the journalists pounced on this incident in the post-race presser and ask the podium sitters about it. here is the clip:

in this clip, dovi essentially says it was a dangerous move from jorge, but he wasn't sure what jorge's intent had been and he needs to watch the footage again. valentino (who had been the most outspokenly critical of sic of the three of them earlier in the presser) takes the opportunity presented to him to have a bit of a potshot at jorge. he says that dovi doesn't have the best relationship with sic but jorge had done something pretty similar in the race... at which point dovi goes "also lorenzo is not my friend"

which, you know. not exactly a major incident, but I find it very charming dovi felt the need to clarify that, actually, he doesn't like either of them. valentino also adds that by jorge's own standards, surely he too should have gotten a penalty. not exactly a meeting of jorge's biggest fans hm

(7) mapping eight-gate

well I can't leave it out, can I

so in 2017 jorge switches from yamaha to ducati and does not have a great time of it. a lot of weekends, he's just too slow, other times he shoots to the front of a race at the start (typically not great news for the rest of the field in his yamaha days) and then chews up his tyres before gradually dropping like a stone back through the field. at some point that year it became a bit of a running gag - especially when you saw he was the only big name to be picking a soft tyre and just went... buddy we ALL know how this is gonna end....

while this was happening, his teammate dovi was for the first time in his premier class career in championship contention. an extremely close title fight throughout the year with five protagonists until pretty late in the season, it eventually went to a title decider in valencia between dovi and marc. you know, the kind of year where every point counts. the race where marc put a bit of daylight between himself and dovi was phillip island, with marc winning a great dogfight out front while dovi had a bit of a horror show of a weekend. this meant that a lot would have to go right for dovi to have a chance of still winning the title... and sepang was already a match point race for marc

ducati had not won a championship since their 2007 title, courtesy of one casey stoner. after that year, their bike became steadily less competitive every season, reaching a nadir around the 2011-13-ish period. so by the time 2017 rolled around, they wanted this so so badly - even if they wouldn't have expected dovi to lead the charge. dovi had only narrowly beaten out iannone in the 'who's going to be fired for our shiny new lorenzo hire' contest of 2016, and really it was supposed to be jorge who was carrying ducati's dreams on his shoulders. but, never mind, they were throwing everything behind dovi now... no stone left unturned

which brings us, of course, to the subject of team orders. this discourse really took off at the penultimate race of the season at sepang, but was already brewing before that - and in phillip island, satellite ducati rider redding had been told early in the race to let dovi past

here from marc at sepang:

dovi had been in great form all weekend at sepang - and with his wet weather prowess being what it was, really there shouldn't have been any need for team orders at all. but he got a sluggish start, and the race unfolded from there... until eventually jorge was in first, dovi was in second and marc in fourth. in those positions, marc would have clinched the title there

and then, jorge got a message on his dashboard. suggested mapping: mapping 8. pit boards and dashboards and all sorts of boards will feature various codes during races, most of them completely innocuous - but of course they are a healthy source of all sorts of conspiracies. the timing of this one was certainly... notable, and speculation immediately started about how it might be a way of telling jorge that he should swap positions with dovi

jorge didn't end up letting dovi pass - it is questionable whether he really would have done so with what would have been his first ducati win on the line. in the end, he made a mistake that let dovi through so that dovi claimed the win anyway, keeping himself in mathematical contention in valencia. and jorge did say afterwards he was keeping dovi's title hopes in mind, kind of

jorge also said he hadn't gotten any message indicating team orders, and of course nobody at ducati confirmed that mapping eight did have anything to do with team orders

for what it's worth, this is what dovi said about their relationship at this stage:

lovely! let's see what the vibes are like a few months later

anyway, onto valencia. this race was pretty boring despite being a title decider, but the jorge/dovi bits were just unequivocally the weekend's most enjoyable aspect and rather nicely spiced up the whole thing. dovi's chances were always slim going in, given he'd have to win the race and marc would have to barely get any points at all... but still, you never know, right? marc could always crash (narrator: he did almost crash). jorge plays coy early in the weekend about the whole 'helping dovi out thing', and basically just started putting in place...? ... very specific conditions...? under which he'd help:

so during the actual race, dovi got stuck behind jorge in p5, with marc ahead of both of them. valencia is traditionally not a fantastic track to overtake at... so even if dovi had been faster, it's not like he'd have an easy time clearing jorge and cracking on. but they were beginning to drift further away from dani in p3 as ducati watched on, increasingly unamused by what was happening - and the tv cameras were of course kind enough to repeatedly show the ducati box looking deeply unamused. again, they went for the good old mapping eight message, which, hey, that could mean anything! they sure did keep showing it to jorge though, almost like he wasn't paying attention to it

eventually, they abandon all subtlety and go for a pit board message that does just straight-up tell jorge to swap positions. jorge kept ignoring the messages, lap after lap, and he never ended up letting dovi past. eventually they both crashed and marc claimed the title with a p3 finish, so it wouldn't have mattered anyway, but... still. the feeling was that this might things rather awkward inside of ducati

publicly, ducati was extremely keen to smooth over the whole controversy, saying they totally weren't mad at jorge blatantly ignoring team orders. jorge had, after all, explained to them (and the media, repeatedly) that he had totally been intending to help dovi by dragging him closer to dani

Giving his take on events, Lorenzo acknowledged that he ignored Ducati’s instruction because he felt Dovizioso’s chances would be boosted by having him directly ahead. “Even looking at this [dashboard] suggestion, I keep pushing until the end, because I knew it was the best thing for me, for Ducati and for Dovi,” said Lorenzo. “I helped him to improve his pace by one or two tenths, to be as close as possible to the first group. My intention was, and it was the case, that we arrive at the first group. If he had the option to win, I would have gone wide and let him pass. But unfortunately it was not like that. Maybe in some corners Dovi was close and I slow down a little bit his pace, but in general terms, having my wheel in front of him made him improve slightly his pace. I helped him stayed closer to the front group. “I knew Dovi was struggling, I knew his pace during all the weekend, and I knew he was making the best pace of the weekend just in the race. It was [because of the] help from my wheel. I’m happy because I was not wrong. If I was wrong and slowing him, I would be very sorry. But it’s not like that, my feeling was true.”

which, you know. is it really that easy to tell how much faster you are than someone who's sitting on your rear tyre? who's to say. dovi did certainly seem rather keen to get past

anyhow, of course there were plenty of fun dramatics post-race:

'our rider ignored team suggestions not team orders' is a great line, fairs. there's plenty more of this from ducati, some excellent spin doctoring - and dovi was extremely magnanimous about what had happened:

the whole thing was pretty undignified from all non-dovi parties, but it was also very funny so who's to say if it was bad or not

(8) runner-up-gate

let's check in on them in 2018, the second and ultimately last year in which they were teammates. remember that 'undermining morale' quote from above? those are from early 2018, after dovi says he wouldn't be surprised to see jorge elsewhere the following season. so, once jorge has complained that dovi had been trying to put him down his entire career, comes this:

so that's something. jorge, dovi and dani have a three-in-one crash in jerez, after which some fingers are pointed but it all remains fairly civil, and a bit later dovi says that jorge's approach doesn't work at ducati:

by the summer break, jorge's results had gotten better, but it was already too late to save the relationship with ducati and they parted ways. anyway, here's dovi and jorge having another go at it:

And while a rough patch for Dovizioso coupled with breakthrough back-to-back wins for Lorenzo in Mugello and Barcelona have now left the pair just three points apart in the standings, Dovizioso refused to back down from his claim when speaking to Spanish sports daily Marca ahead of the upcoming Brno race. “He’s won two races,” Dovizioso said. “Winning two races does not solve the problem of a year and a half. Lorenzo was not signed to win two races. Therefore I do not change my mind.” When the comments were put to Lorenzo, the three-time champion offered an ardent retort, stating that Dovizioso's rhetoric was proof of the claim he'd made back in April. “I'm a bit fed up with this situation, mainly because when I had trouble and he was winning, I was down there applauding,” Lorenzo told Spanish broadcaster Movistar. “What I said in Argentina - and the comments caused a big surprise - you can see that I was right. “He tried to undermine me, or downplay what I achieve or just attack me. As you can see, I wasn't lying. He's still doing it and now he says my method is not good, according to him.” Lorenzo intimated that Dovizioso was in no position to criticise him, as the Italian could do no better than runner-up to Marc Marquez in a 'perfect' 2017 season. He said: “I think my method has not worked too bad in my career. I've won three MotoGP titles and have 46 wins.” “In my second year in Ducati I'm usually faster than him, but maybe I should look at his method closer if in his best season, with everything going perfectly, he was second. Otherwise he's fourth or seventh usually. I'd tell him to leave me to go my way and to focus on his own and everything will be better, because when you have an angry Lorenzo it's usually worse for you.” 

fair to say that by this point the pretence at civility has mostly been dropped. I'm rather fond of the "lorenzo was not signed to win two races" line, though "when you have an angry lorenzo it's usually worse for you" is also really strong stuff. dovi tries to restore a little bit of peace:

Responding in turn to Lorenzo's tirade, Dovizioso sought to play down the conflict. “Jorge has his ideas and I think they are based on particular things. I don't think like him, but it's not a problem,” he told Movistar. “Everybody creates their own ideas based on what they see and how they live. “I don't think he has everything clear in his head about what's happened, but we continue the relationship that we started last year with respect, there's no particular problem. If he thinks this way, that's his problem."

so basically the classic 'idk what he's on about but it's not my problem' approach to attempting to defuse feuds

(9) twitter-gate

there's a few more on-track battles where it's nicely obvious how badly they want to beat each other, with jorge beating marc just ahead of dovi in austria and then dovi beating jorge in brno. jorge's season is increasingly derailed by injuries, which sets the stage for their next big spat:

The row was sparked by Dovizioso's comments to Sky Italia after qualifying at Sepang on Saturday, as he was asked what he thought of Lorenzo having to pull out of the Malaysian GP weekend with injury. "I don't know the details, I don't want to get into this, it's a bit of a strange situation," said Dovizioso."It happens often in Ducati or to certain riders, but I don't understand the details and I don't want to get into it and give my opinion." When it was put to him he was offering 'cryptic words', he added: "I leave things there, it's not my problem."

pretty vague, yeah. but anyway, I'm sure jorge had a proportionate response to this

Dovizioso's comments prompted a series of irate posts from Lorenzo on Twitter, with his first reaction being "Thank you very much @AndreaDovizioso! You are a real gentleman!". In his next post, he went on to call Dovizioso "an exemplary teammate", adding: "You applaud him under the podium when he wins and then... (That's right, he does not give his opinion, it's not his problem)." After that, Lorenzo labelled Dovizioso "envious" and described him as "a world champion... in 125cc."

the podium thing really bothered him, don't you think. their ducati in-fighting follows that general pattern where dovi says something... a little shady, a little ambiguous, where his intentions aren't entirely obvious... at which point jorge goes all in at fighting back and has a go at dovi - often not as much for what dovi is actually saying, but what jorge thinks dovi is implying. which is based on his understanding of dovi, the image of dovi he's built up in his head over the years, so that he is... predisposed to think ill of the intentions of the 'intelligent' dovi who always knows exactly what he's saying

again, dovi tried to downplay the argument, while simultaneously not exhibiting much patience for jorge's stance:

After the Malaysian GP, Dovizioso was asked about Lorenzo's responses to his comments, and the Italian accused his teammate of reading too much into headlines. He said: “Why should I talk to Lorenzo? I do not waste time on these things. He makes the usual mistake of giving too much importance to what is written, even without the context. "I have not pointed my finger at anyone and I have no problem with Jorge."

if I were ducati, I probably would've let the whole thing blow over given jorge was off soon anyway. but they decided the whole thing was so bad they had to organise a peace summit

Asked about the situation, Ducati sporting director Paolo Ciabatti admitted to Motorsport.com that the Bologna marque has already planned to sit its two riders on Tuesday in Milan to make it clear what its priorities are. Ciabatti said: “It is clear that the interests of Ducati come before personal problems between riders. On Tuesday we will be together in Milan, for the EICMA [motorcycle show] and we have in mind to spend half an hour to sit and talk to Jorge and Andrea. "We want to avoid similar things to what happened last weekend. "I understand that these kinds of situations can happen. Sometimes riders get nervous during a Grand Prix weekend and on a rainy day, with tricky conditions, sometimes they say things they shouldn’t have said."

god knows how that turned out

(10) wow, you guys aren't gonna let this go, huh

late 2020 and jorge's career is already over, while dovi's looks like it will be... paused, at the very least. which is always a good time to check in with riders on how they feel about their rivals - if they're still being nasty you know that shit was personal. from december:

some quality petty material here. "I can't understand his somewhat peculiar mind" vs "he was envious of me since 250cc, but I wanted to give our relationship a chance". note too jorge talking again about how generous he had been in the face of dovi's 2017 successes, and how he feels like this was not reciprocated at all. jorge's complaints don't stop there:

merry christmas!

not the only rider jorge has beefed with post-retirement, but compare and contrast with how he really hasn't been doing any of that with some of his biggest career rivals. valentino, marc, dani - sure, he still talks about the controversies he's had with them pretty regularly (to put it lightly), and he's hardly free of complaints... but mostly it's a distinctly nostalgic tone he's adopting with these guys. admittedly, it helps that none of those three have gone out of their way to say anything particularly inflammatory about jorge. still, the absolute lack of any sort of rapprochement with dovi of all people is pretty funny

bonus: that time when jorge skittled all of marc's rivals

you know how in catalunya 2019, jorge took out like? all of marc's major rivals in that era including himself in one go? with half a decade of hindsight, this was kind of hilarious, and it did also feature jorge having to eat a hell of a lot of humble pie and go to the three other blokes to apologise. anyway I have a lovingly assembled set of screenshots of all three of them emoting in their boxes after the incident, all suffering some form of an existential crisis. here is dovi contemplating the bleak realities of our brief lives on this planet:

truly one of the world's least enthusiastic waves

bonus 2: another one for old time's sake

already posted this elsewhere, but this from late 2023 made me laugh

"jorge came to ducati and thought he was going to beat everything, but in the end he didn't" uh huh

[buneeto]

the detective and his watson

day 5 : crossdressing

akechi's design is by @depressodium !

bonus dancing wip under cut

credits:

akira: samuellovesmilk, lumialle, ATLUS

goro: lumialle, ATLUS, xelandis, helsoseira, zekal231, samuellovesmilk, mihoyo, 3DCG

stage: samuellovesmilk, ATLUS

ray-mmd 1.5.2 (rui), ikdiffusion

song: Will Power - Persona 5

motion: Mr. Kiwii/SushiiiAnimations from DSN (ATLUS)

[moe-broey]

Miwabiwis.......

I actually do like her official outfit! I just... had a deep need.... put that girl in a nightgown and slippers RIGHT NOW‼️‼️‼️‼️ Also it is admittedly so much easier to draw 🧍

I did try to keep in line with most of her official look though! Or add more emphasis to little details, like the red berries... other details I added, like the bloomers, keep the roundness of her og dress! BUT ALSO.... they are just so cutes.... I imagine they're made of rose petals...... I was also thinking angelic motifs. With the dress shape, and the smaller wings shaped as such!

[beeduoo]

originnssssss who remembers origins i Loved origins

[variksel]

ok but this is like an entire genre of Guy right

like. personality, looks, humor, the way they all make darker jokes and/or content, even the way they talk and their cadence is so insanely similar i feel like im going crazy which factory are they popping these motherfuckers out of

[gardenoblues]

The Less I Know The Better

[royalarchivist]

Quackity: Lately, I have been participating in events and projects, and unfortunately it's become clear to me that my presence and name have only been used to attract the attention of my national and international community with the objective, as I see it, of generating more attention towards controversies - destructive controversies, and a rupture that is very clear in the community. [...] In advance, I ask the organizers of any type of events and projects like this to please show more respect to me and my community, because I've shown lots of sympathy and cooperation in these various projects and events, but it's become clear to me that their only interest is in using my name. My name and my community have been used to attract all this attention for distorted purposes, and I will no longer allow that to happen. That is not what my content is about - not me nor my content nor anything I’ve done.

Here's Quackity's commentary on respect and his reasoning for distancing himself and his projects from future events and awards shows.

[ Full Transcript ↓ ]

-

Quackity: Before I leave, I would like to talk about something that is very serious for me and something that I would like to tell you about. Because for me it is a very serious topic and it is a topic that- well, I had my mind on and I want to express it- [reading Chat] yes, thank you. Merry Christmas, Merry Christmas.

Anyways, lately I have been participating in events and projects, and in these events and projects, unfortunately it's become clear to me that my presence and name have only been used to attract the attention of my national and international community with the objective, as I see it, of generating more attention towards controversies - destructive controversies, and a rupture that is very clear in the community, and this is what I want to say: I'm NOT ok with these types of dynamics or stuff like this, and I want to make it very clear to my stream, my community, and everyone that, for this exact reason that I just mentioned, I want to make it clear that I want to distance myself and any of my projects from the Esland Awards, which you all know is coming up.

Sadly, the Esland Awards have been an event with a history of much controversy, a lot of division, and a lot of divisions within the community, and as you guys know, as you know, my content has never been characterized by seeking controversy or divisions or anything like that. It's for this exact reason that I don't want to be involved with these awards.

In advance, I ask the organizers of any type of events and projects like this to please show more respect to me and my community, because I've shown lots of sympathy and cooperation in these various projects and events, but it's become clear to me that their only interest is in using my name. My name and my community have been used to attract all this attention for distorted purposes, and I will no longer allow that to happen. I don't want it to happen. That is not what my content is about - not me nor my content nor anything I've done. That's what I want to make very clear here.

That's about it. I'm going to continue with the projects I'm doing and I want to thank my community so much for the support and love. I appreciate it very much, but I wanted to make this clear - I wanted to make this clear. This is just a topic I wanted to address quickly.

Thank you for all the love and support, I love you all so much.

[skyrayroost]

I thought I was far enough

[mellohiizz]

Mapicc you say...hmm have we considered mapetech?

ohhhhh interesting one. im considering, yes.

[waywardsalt]

anyways. my very first attempt at malenia