#i feel like ill never be good enough

[erinwantstowrite]

I might be wrong, but didn't Roy also first meet Jason when he was 15 and Roy was in his 20s?

I've always thought their ship was kinda weird.

my little brother is only two years younger than me, but with the way our birthdays fall, he was three years behind me in school. so when i was a senior, my brother was a freshman. (for anyone not american: when i was 17, he was 15, but the age gaps between a freshman and a senior are usually a little larger and developmentally, it's a big deal.) we were both in band together and both pretty well known pretty fast. which meant that other freshman felt comfortable to go up to me and talk despite me being a senior (which was fine, because i was a section leader and i wanted all freshman to feel comfy enough to ask me questions and talk). and sometimes, that conversation would be about my little brother, asking if he was in a relationship and blah blah blah. THAT was adorable to me (with context, my brother was a little shit in middle school but when he got to highschool he suddenly decided he wanted to be a downright gentleman and got super embarrassed by this so i often teased him LMFAOO)

however. there was ONE person in my grade (that i was close friends with!!) that said "if your brother was a senior too, I'd date him"

shit was NOT CUTE. i was flabbergasted. i was appalled, even. even as an innocent comment, it freaked me out and i went full big sibling mode. tore that person a new one because that's literally my baby brother what the hell are you talking about????

now imagine that the age gap is even larger? nah, if it was my little brother the person would be DEAD. even if we were close friends before then. which is why im confused why the Jayroy ship is as popular or accepted as it is... like i know the batman fandom are fucking weirdos (looking at batcest shippers you fucking freaks i hope you feel embarrassed and shamed) but this ship slipped through the cracks i think and not everyone is aware of that age gap or why it's weird. at most i've seen people comment about dick being like "you're dating my little brother??" but not like. in the way of "hey what the fuck that age gap is fucking weird" and instead as "you can't date my family!!" ummmmmmmmm

[arsenicflame]

It's a time-honoured tradition- every time Sam comes across Izzy (and Ed) in their travels, he asks Izzy to marry him. And every time, Izzy turns him down.

At this point, Sam is asking more for the sake of it than any belief Izzy will ever say yes, a remnant of childhood dedication touched with 30 years of heartbreak and regret- though even now, a small part of him still holds out hope. Sam's promises have only got more extravagant over the years, from a job as his first mate, to a captaincy, a fleet at his command, a whole fucking island if that's what Izzy wants- but he knows it isn't though, not really. If Izzy was ever going to agree to marry him, to leave his life and go with Sam, it wouldn't be for anything Sam could offer him. Izzy never did care for flashy shows of wealth, for a ship or to be captain. The only thing that ever mattered to him was loyalty given, and loyalty shown in return. 

It all comes to a head after Stede left and came back, after Izzy lost a toe, lost his leg. Sam hasn't seen him since before things with Ed started to really slide off the rails, before stress permanently set into the lines of Izzy’s face. So, when he sees a dishevelled man with a hoof for a leg in a no-name port, he doesn't even consider the idea that he might know him. It's only when he turns towards him, and Sam catches a glance at those oh too familiar tattoos, he realises this is Izzy, his Izzy, that stands before him.

Knowing Izzy's discomfort with pity, he doesn't treat him any differently than he would in years gone by, positioning himself in Izzy's line of sight before approaching and sweeping him up into a bone crushing hug. 

“Israel-goddamn-Hands!” he exclaims, as Izzy grumbles back a begrudging “Samuel-fucking-Bellamy”, a tradition almost as old as their friendship itself. Izzy might not hug him back, but he can’t keep the corner of his mouth from twitching, just for a second.

(If Sam holds Izzy a little tighter and a little longer than usual, well. That's his business)

By the time Sam lets go, most of the crew has appeared in the town square, drawn in by the commotion. They may have given Izzy his leg and welcomed him as one of them, but still there’s an underlying tension, with nobody quite ready to set aside everything that happened before the Kraken. Seeing him cosying up to an unknown man sets everyone on edge, unsure whether to come to their first mate’s aid, or to assume that they've been betrayed once again.

When Ed sees that the yelling was Sam, his hand goes tense where it's held in Stede's. He knows the routine, has seen it more times than he can count, but as he watches them part he realises that this is the first time in a long time he's unsure of what Izzy's response will be.

Knowing that something’s different, knowing that Izzy's feeling vulnerable already, Sam doesn't go for the same flashy proposal he’s been giving for years. He doesn't promise Izzy the world, he doesn't cause a scene (or, any more of a scene than he already has, anyway). He looks at the fractured man in front of him, takes his face in his hands, and says the exact same thing to him he said when they were little more than boys. “Israel, I have to ask you. I know what you'll say, but I have to try. Come with me. Marry me and sail away with me. I'll keep you safe”

And Izzy… hesitates. He glances over at Ed, at Stede, and says to Sam “...We’re staying in port for a week. Ask me again then”

That's the moment Sam knows there is something deeply, horribly, wrong. He's not just looking at an Izzy who got seriously injured in a fight and is struggling to cope, this is something so much bigger than that- and that Ed has something to do with it. Izzy wouldn't even be considering leaving if he didn't. Whether it was negligence or something more sinister, Sam doesn't yet know, but he intends to find out.

[skunkes]

i loooove when ocs unrealized development makes them feel like real people like no i dont know whether talon is genuinely attracted to women after years of both clinging to them for safety and years of putting them onto that untouchable idealized Perfect Protector Pedestal that must remain untainted by any bad experiences, so he doesn't even try to Be With any. He doesn't know either

[xxplastic-cubexx]

take Charles to the Paralympics

grandpa gonna demolish the competition 😼

he doesnt even need to use his telepathy to read what his opponents are gonna do next to dominate the game grandpa's just Him

[mushed-kid]

.

[witchqueen]

Does anyone have any tips to help stop yourself from comparing your artwork to others, or equating your value as an artist with likes and reblogs?

I've struggled with this for a while and it's getting old, I don't know how to just shrug it off. Any genuine advice would be nice

[mudstoneabyss]

actually. the specific phrasing that boy Kevin wants to kill older Kevin with "I must disassemble him, piece by piece, so that everything inside of the Old Kevin comes out. Only then can the New Kevin truly begin." is so incredibly the idea that to heal from trauma and "improve" you have to destroy every "wrong" part of yourself, that everything "tainted" by it has to somehow be replaced by something untouched (which isn't possible)

[nora-durst]

sorry i’m not done talking about chaos walking actually. i’m just thinking about todd hewitt as a ya sci-fi protagonist like you just open the book as a 12 year old or whatever and you’re like can’t wait to read about this young hero’s thrilling adventures on this far off planet! okay he’s illiterate. oh he’s mean to his dog. ok he self harms. oh now he’s committing a hate crime. and that’s like. before we even get to book two and the whole complicit in a genocidal regime situation. todd hewitt the character that you are 🫶

[charliespringverse]

i think it should be possible to scream without making any noise or disturbing anyone or inviting any questions . just sometimes . as a treat .

[luck-of-the-drawings]

two wrongs WILL make a right! ive got another lease on life, and im using it well, who cares if this is all fucked up cause we're all GOING TO HELL! IM JUST WILLIAM WHO SHOULD BE DEAD, HAD TO FOLLOW THE THREAD, thought he was just chillin! now he is a villain! HES ALWAYS SUCH A BUMMER, HE WANTS TO TRUST HIS BROTHER WILLIAM IN A HALLWAY BY HIMSEEEEEEEEEEEELLLLLFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF

[goatsandgangsters]

so much for my nice relaxing weekend curled up inside with my book and my fresh bread that I made

my mom sent me a guilt trip text at 1 AM because apparently I haven't Atoned Enough for... being upset about her terminal illness on christmas, and crying, and being further upset that they left me alone to cry by myself, and snapping at my stepdad's mom for being homophobic at me while I was crying about being left alone to cry about my mom's terminal illness. and apparently I owe my stepdad's mom an apology for ""screaming at her"" (I did not scream) ""even if you think you were slighted"" (she was homophobic)

and it sucks because I thought we were past that, I actually was feeling a lot better and like I'd recovered from All The Emotional Drain That Was Christmas. and I waited MONTHS to start that book bc I was feeling shitty emotionally and I wanted to be able to enjoy it, and my plan for the weekend was to do that, and now it's all just. a big stupid pile of ugly feelings on the floor again

[saudebazi]

had such a good time im going to think and smile to myself for the next two weeks

[skunkes]

if life is categorized by Before Loss and After Loss then I exist in the before but with a countdown to the after. and the countdown is always always present and debilitating. the loss will be debilitating too but i cant help myself. i will always suffer twice.

[xxplastic-cubexx]

Magneto would love lumpia meanwhile Charles would have his Bibingka and Puto Bungbong hehe

Happy Holidays!

asks that remind me my bitchass friend kayla promised to make me *puto two years ago and she still hasnt

*puto is a filipino rice cake i do know it also means 'bitch' in spanish we do not have to address that thank you

[scattered-winter]

made the mistake of reading through the political discussions on my big family groupchat that I usually keep muted. you must never do such a thing.

[phagodyke]

the masculine urge to take a saucepan off thr draining board and bash myself repeatedly over the head with it until I pass out and no longer have to experience feeling Bad 😍