#i feel like i dont need to explain these at this point

[wosoloml]

crawling back to you II leah williamson x reader

warnings: toxic, hidden relationship, jealousy, angst

summary: After hiding their relationship for years because Leah was still in the closet, they eventually broke up. Yet, they always found their way back into each others lives.

wc: 1,3k I based on this request

"it´s been two years, Leah. Why are you still referring to me as your best friend and roommate to your teammates? You didn´t even tell Keira about me?! She's your best friend!" I yelled at Leah, more out of frustration than anger. I'm so tired of hiding this relationship, of hiding myself behind the 'best friend´ label.

leah being in the cloest was never a problem for me - for us. But since rumours about her dating her male best friend were a thing it as hard to keep everything private. Growing up in milton keynes it was hard to be openly gay.

"Y/n you know its hard for me to tell everyone we are dating. We both know how they reacted after Keira came out to them. She still suffers from it and i dont wanna experience it please undertstand that." leah tries to explain her situation to me and i wish i could understand her the way i want to. But im too hurt.

"I should understand you? Have you ever tried to understand me? I can't do this anymore, Leah. You deserve someone who can handle this - but I can't. I'm sorry, Lee. It's for the best if we break up."

I say the words with tears in my eyes, my voice barely holding steady. It's a hard decision, but itt's one I have to make.

Being with Leah from the time I was 14 to now, at 17, has meant everything to me. I'm so grateful for the past three years, but I just can't do this anymore.

---------

"Y/N, I BOUGHT US TICKETS FOR THE NEXT GAME AT JOIE STADIUM!"

My girlfriend's excited voice echoes through our shared apartment. It's been seven months since I moved to Manchester and three months since we started living together.

"I'm already excited!" I shout back while checking who City's opponent is. Of course - it's Arsenal.

It feels strange to be thinking about football again, especially after breaking up with Leah almost a year ago. But maybe she's not even playing anymore.

Little did I know, she's been captaining the squad for the past year.

Our seats are incredible, giving us a perfect view of the pitch. As the teams walk out, my eyes immediately land on the captain's armband wrapped around Leah's arm. A strange sense of pride swells in my chest. Playing for the Gunners - leading them - had been her dream since she joined the club so many years ago. Seeing her live that dream now brings an unshakable smile to my face.

My thoughts are interrupted when my girlfriend starts chanting loudly, her passion for the game contagious. For a moment, I forget my ex is even on the pitch.

I never told Sarah about my past with a certain blonde Arsenal player.

I could feel Leah's eyes on me the entire game.

A part of me wanted to tease her, so every time she came over to take a corner, I laughed extra loud at whatever Sarah said or kissed her deeply-just to make a point.

I wanted her to see what it felt like to be in a relationship that didn't have to be hidden. To know how beautiful it is to be loved loudly and openly.

Later that evening, my phone buzzed.

leahwilliamson wants to send you a message. My heart started racing. My eyes widened as I read her message.

'Cute little show you put on earlier today.'

I had no idea how to respond to that, so I just sent back a few question marks. It didn't take long for her to reply.

'The way you laughed extra loud at whatever that girl said. The way you kissed her while checking to see if I was watching. I don't care, Y/N' . My blood starts to boil.

----

"Y/N!!"

I snap out of my thoughts as my coworker calls my name. I hurry over to the counter, my eyes widening.

'Can you serve them? I need to make a quick call.'

I manage a nod, but then I notice here - Leah. Sitting in my cafe. With another girl.

I take a deep breath, forcing a polite smile. "Hey, what can I get for you?" I ask, keeping my tone professional.

Leah smirks. "ll have a matcha latte. And what about you, babe-?" She turns to the girl beside her. "A flat white, please. Thank you" the girl says with a warm smile.

I already don't like her.

"Give me one second"

I know exactly why Leah is here - to get under my skin. And it's working. But beneath the teasing, beneath the smug attitude, it just hurts.

Seeing her be so open, so affectionate with someone else. calling her pet names, touching her without hesitation - it stings in a way I can't ignore.

Whenever we were out together, she barely even said my name, let alone held my hand. Now, she's making sure I see how different things are.

Every time I glance at their table, Leah is already looking at me, eyes filled with something I can't quite place. But I do notice how touchy she is, how overly flirty she's being.

And it makes my blood boil. I text her 'now we are even'. Her eyes darkened as she read the message.

-------

The club was alive with loud music, the clink of glasses, and the smell of sweaty bodies. It was my best friend's 25th birthday, and we decided to celebrate it in our hometown, London. I was also hoping it would serve as a distraction from my recent breakup. After two years of dating Sarah, she ended things last weekend because I couldn't bring myself to tell her I loved her. It's not that I didn't care about her or that I wasn't in love, but things felt different. The only woman I will ever truly love is Leah. Forever.

Suddenly, someone bumped into me, spilling their drink all over my shirt. "Oh god, I'm sorry!" They said as I looked up, meeting their eyes. It was Leah. Who else could it be?

"I didn't know you were here" she said, sounding surprised.

"Yeah, it's Anna's birthday today, and I thought Id come back to London for the occasion" I replied. "What about you?"

Leah seemed taken aback by how easily I kept the conversation going. "Actually, we won the league today. It was the last game of the season against Aston Villa, and we won."

The conversation flowed naturally, and then, unexpectedly, she asked THE question.

"So, is your girlfriend here?" she asked.

"No,†I said "we are not together anymore." "Oh, really? Im sorry to hear that. Funny enough, my girlfriend broke up with me two weeks ago" she replied, a look of surprise crossing her face. I was stunned, my eyes widening in disbelief. The tension between us shifted, and an unfamiliar but unmistakable feeling of missing her washed over me.

After that, we kept texting and even FaceTimed a few times. The vibe was strange but oddly familiar, as though we had never stopped talking, despite having broken up over 3.5 years ago. Nothing had really changed.

---------

"Happy one year, baby!" Leah greeted me with breakfast in bed and the most beautiful bouquet of red roses. I couldn't have been happier with her by my side.

Even though she had a game on our anniversary , it didn't make the day any less special. I cheered her on from the 'Friends and Family' section, proudly wearing her name on the back of my Arsenal jersey. When she scored the winning goal, she celebrated by making a special gesture just for me.

Right person, right time.

[hoonieyun]

now playing...

i'll still be here - leigh-anne

pairing: lee heeseung x reader x sim jaeyun

warnings: i dont think so but pls lmk if i need to add anything, 18+

pls ignore timestamps and possible typos lol - this is partially written, please be sure to read the written portion to fully understand the story <3

wc: 468

your phone was endlessly dinging, making it hard for you to focus but you tried your best to focus on the lady sitting in front of you. she had a sleek bun, wire rimmed glasses, and a pen and paper sat in front of her. 

“do you want to get that, yn?” she asks and you shake your head. 

“no, not important” you say with a smile as you quickly switch the ringer off to mute all of the sounds. 

“what is it, anyway?” she asks and you explain that it’s all of the people reaching out to you regarding your new song and because you kind of dropped it out of the blue; a lot of people were pleasantly surprised. you also added that you were planning to just drop the song and kind of go MIA to stop yourself from obsessing over every single thing that people say about you online. 

“that’s good, i’m glad you’re doing your best to listen to my advice but don’t feel like you need to be so strict with yourself. i know you’re a popstar so being on the internet is a part of your job; just know when to get off when it’s becoming too much, ok?”

she was so knowledgable in everything she said, it always made so much sense and whatever she said to you brought so much clarity. which was a good thing because it was her job at the end of the day. 

the rest of your session with your therapist goes very smoothly, talking about your goals for the week and habits that you’ve wanted to get into that you haven’t and other habits that have been hard for you to break and how you can get to a point of releasing those habits. 

it’s only been a few days speaking with this therapist but since she was a part of the mental health retreat you attended previously, she had your information from the retreat so you weren’t completely starting from scratch. 

you bid her goodbye with a small hug and you make your way to your car, pulling out your phone and quickly scrolling through all of the notifications before driving to your apartment. deciding that you’d respond to your texts when you got home. you listened to your new song on your drive home and you don’t realize you’re crying until your version gets too blurry. it wasn’t tears of sadness but something of release. 

like you’re releasing so much weight off your shoulders without the guilt your old self would feel for putting yourself first. as if you had become a totally new person in the last month and this new era of your life was focused on just you. 

choosing yourself and not feeling guilty for wanting to be happy.

masterlist - back - next

hoonieyun notes: guys u need to listen to this song its so beautiful like truly one of my favorite songs.. the lyrics and overall melodic value of the song is so impactful.. anyways omg now playing is almost overrrrr wahhh

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[cicobuffs]

Thinking of Patrick x preachers daughter!reader and he asks her about the ring she started wearing and she explains that it’s a purity ring she was gifted by a lady in church and reader lowkey really buys into it but of course Patrick sees it as the perfect bait to corrupt her. Imagining him eventually sucking on her fingers and pulling the ring off with his mouth

anon you just killed me dead like

i forgot about purity rings like i am so happy that you brought it up. patrick would tease the shit out of you every time he notices it when it gleams from your finger in the sun or when you go to reach for something with the hand that it's on. he'd say something like, "how pure can you really be if you're hanging around with me?" with a scoff before you go to reprimand him.

once you reach the point where you absolutely need to be intimate with him as if its your lifeblood, it'd be in the back of his car and you're on your back with him over you, lips attached to your neck. he has one of your hands in his while the other is snaking its way under your shirt and bra to fondle at one of your nipples and he's grinding into your clothed cunt (patrick zweig hearts grinding and dry humping idgaf). he can feel the ring on your ring finger and he lifts his head up from your neck and brings your hand to his mouth, pulling the ring off of your finger and dropping it to the ground saying, "you dont really need this now, do you?".

[volvolts]

Wanted to run this by you since you keep your own writing very grounded in the text.

What do you think of AUs that take Philip's self-centeredness and reverse it? As in run it in the opposite direction, from Genocidal Bigot towards Guilt-Paralyzed Loner? Do you think there's a right and wrong way to do such AUs? Does it sound like a realistic departure from canon to you?

i dont remember if i ever saw one in a long time (i think defanged belos was only one that comes to mind that's similar rn). i actually haven't seen a lot of au philip stuff like this (i honestly struggle starting a lot of things i've been meaning to get into and also sometimes its hard to find lol). plus writing a guilt ridden character (especially as a main character) is hard since there's a fine line between reading about someone's guilt and just hearing someone wangsting and feeling sorry for themselves. it can get annoying real fast. i also can't properly imagine the right "turning point" for him.

honestly i'm willing to accept breaks from canon if it's fairly minor "quality of life" moments and his turn is believable within the confines of its story ya know? generally i dont think there's a right or wrong way to make this work and if i dont like it it's usually because it goes against my personal takes on the show and not because of "quality" if that makes sense?

though any belos turning good stories im very picky about who they villainize and how they do it. its hard to explain but i feel like if they try to make kikimora worse than belos then i'm not that into it. i think if its feels like the author singled out a character to make them the bad guy because they dont like them, or at least they just like belos more and need a scapegoat if that makes sense? i dont really find this one a lot in this fandom so we're pretty good there tho

as for one that follows canon? i remember a post i saw a while back (i think it was from @/levshany?? i dont remember) where they said a "canon compliant" belos realizing he was wrong and giving up is next to impossible because he would try to die due to the guilt and we would never have the plot.

for something like this to be "canon realistic", this would be my idea of it

(talk of suicide under the read more)

an evil to guilt pipeline belos would be one where he just tries to die. if we want him to live until luz's time then we would have an "immortal who wants to die" situation. he's far enough where it's hard to die easily but not far enough where he's the emperor or anything. and i firmly believe that he would still be the villain

we need to also keep in mind he's still being self centered. he may feel remorseful for his actions but he's so caught up in his punishment and "what he deserves" he doesn't realize that there has to be other avenues to take because this idea clearly isn't working. if we go the loner route, he's a cryptid the witches spread around because they have no clue what he is, he's a lone man who will do any favors you ask but in return you must try to kill him, if you fail he'll end your life instead. he's forgotten caleb and his own hatred for the witches. he only remembers his guilt and his need to die and his anger and self hatred that he can't. he doesn't even remember his why anymore.

if he has the collector, i can see a route where he tries to find a titan to free him. their exchange is this: philip frees the collector and in exchange, the collector either kills or imprisons him as a doll along with everyone else (meanwhile philip is just unconscious and in his own head and no longer feeling anything anymore also i dont remember if luz's dream as a doll was the exception or the rule or only happening when the collector brings you out to play with)

philip is trying so hard to die that he does not care who is going down with him. instead of being a genocidal bigoted maniac, he's more like someone that needs to be put down because he has no idea where to start "redeeming" himself. he would be frustrating and pitiful to watch as he self sabotages and descends further into darkness. he made himself irredeemable because he believed he didn't deserve it.

the problem then would just be this is a complete departure of what the owl house is. forgiveness and redemption isn't that big a theme in toh thats for certain. their themes is self acceptance and expression, among other things. weirdos stick together and all that. this could technically be paralleled to luz's guilt but personally im one of the people who found luz's guilt sudden and also completely unfounded (like she didn't know, plus her helping someone only to make things worse by trusting the wrong person was never treated like a major flaw of hers before. it was something she did but it was never presented as something she needed to fix ya now?)

(but im kinda just rambling at the end here though. obviously fanfic, or any media tbh, is not obligated to teach you a lesson or reflect themes. i dont go into someones au and expect a dissertation. i just hope the author is having fun and other people are too)

[tarantula-hawk-wasp]

Whatever, *crucifies your superstar*

screenshot redraws from jcs 2000

[daisybell-on-a-carousel]

Being someone who read Under The Red Hood and came out with the firm belief that, for Jason, it's not about killing Joker, it's about Jason wanting proof Batman would choose him over the Joker (bc shelia chose the joker). Makes seeing any other media where it's all about just wanting the Joker dead is a teeny bit frustrating. to be honest

Jason could've killed the Joker himself, really, really easily. Jason kidnaps the Joker before the confrontation. I can't open my comic for a reference right now, but it felt like he had the Joker for quite a bit before the confrontation. He had him. He beat him up with a crowbar. He had every single opportunity to kill the Joker himself, but he didn't because that wasn't his goal. Make no mistake, he did plan for the Joker to be dead by the end of it, but do you see what im trying to say here

Edit: If I knew this post was gonna get 1000+ notes I would've tried to word it better or something, this was a rant I made on the way to the grocery store 😭

It's not about making Batman kill either. When Batman says he won't kill, Jason adjusts and goes, 'Let ME kill the Joker or kill me to stop me' instead. The test is all about Batman choosing him. The whole final confrontation is Jason's first death again. The parent, The Joker, and the explosives. It even ends with Jason unable to move as a bomb goes off right next to him again because the parent didn't choose Jason. And instead tried finding an option that'd benefit them and (consequencely) letting the Joker walk, again, lol, lmao <-in agony

[ophanstears]

🍀

I know that Clover's gender is up to interpretation (the devs DID say so themselves) but I still feel weird when people make them exclusively male or female LOL Like it's TECHNICALLY fine??? but it leaves a bad taste in my mouth.

more in tags as usual because I am a yapper. i am so sorry for having strong opinions about gender and representation. i am usually more fun than this 🥲🥲🥲🥲

[k1tty5]

hello :D please tell me more about your mezalian (is that how you spell it??) smalletho I will forever be indebted to you

(they are gorgeous I love them sm)

hey hi !! it would be my pleasure … (and I’ve been spelling it mezalean ??? but i have no idea LOL. there might be a canon spelling but i havent watched joels esmp1 since… probably since it ended. i will have to check sometime)

apologizing in advance because i will probably get very ramble-y!!

ummm. Oh god. How to start. Lets see. WELL. In this silly little au (i guess it has become a bit more than just me doodling designs LOL) in my head they have like this sort of zelink dynamic? obviously without all the zelda lore & stuff, just that kind of … okay forgive me I haven’t brushed up on my zelink lore for a good many years but. Like the princess and her personal knight that doesn’t really talk much sort of thing.

this made more sense in my head. But yeah. They have the vibes of zelink ? At least if i remember zelink right, I have a really bad memory :’) not exactly the same, i do think etho talks to joel (whereas if iirc link never really talks) - especially after getting to know him a bit - but just. they have the Vibes. You know?

I reckon Joel’s definitely very into sculpting in this au, maybe dabbles a little in painting - I imagine mezalea to be very heavy on art and expression in general. think you’d especially see lots of pottery and textiles all around the place. He probably also has an interest in some form of like. um. whats the word. Some sort of … fighting. lmao. Specifically thinking of fencing, i had this idea in my head that he’s watched Etho practice outside the palace at some point and is just absolutely fascinated and enamored. by both the practice and etho himself haha.

and for etho… talented swordsman? he is Not washed. i dont really have many ideas for his character in this au To be completely honest, mostly just of his personality. Although, I alsooo think he’s probably not actually from mezalea? I like to draw him with those pointy elf ears, and i think mezaleans are just humans. I cant remember if thats canon or not but um. mezaleans have human ears, so i’d imagine etho’s probably from like.. rivendelle? Is that. What it’s called. The elf guys? Are they elves??? Goodness I cant remember. Grimlands would make sense too since i THINK they’re kind of like. technical engineer guys? but i dont know what species they are um so ,,, yeah,,,,

i think joel’s probably a bit put off by etho at first, mostly just because he’s not super enthused about the idea of a personal guard, but also because the guys a bit odd, you know? but he’s also probably suuuper intrigued by him. he wants to figure this new guy out, and when they start talking a bit more, i think. They are both incredibly charmed by the other. head over heels? possibly.

most of my ideas of this au are just little scenes that are cute and silly but dont follow any main plot. I would love to write some one-shots of some of the ideas i have in the future, but as of right now im experiencing a bout of creative burnout and am busy with the holidays - spending time with family, so… not right now lol!

hopefully this is what you wanted,,,, i tend to get very ramble-y when talking about literally anything, so i do apologize for that haha, i am Not good at explaining things in simple ways, as i’ve said many a time before.

[xxplastic-cubexx]

what is your favorite thing about charles and your favorite thing about erik? separately, as in what you like most about their characters :]

a devious question this one is, my friend!!! it's hard enough for me to explain my thoughts cohesively, but having to pick ONE thing i particularly love is difficult. with characters like charles and erik, theres been so much done with their characters over the decades and so they have so many components to them that make them so interesting and fun to observe. BUT I TRY FOR YOU TODAY. under the cut i kinda ramble and the size of this text box makin me anxious

i think if i were to be simple and broad, what i enjoy most about charles is his determination to help others, even if he isn't really thanked and/or if people don't even like him. ofc, this isn't to say he hasn't done wrong- to be honest, the fact he does wrong/questionable things at times is another aspect of him i really enjoy, maybe because- broadly speaking- he's meant to be altruistic (intent vs outcome and all that). i don't know if that's super exciting to most people, but it is for me

as for erik, my reason for liking him is easier to explain tbh. To Be Simple And Broad, his progression from villain to antihero over the decades has been fun to observe (as much as i have so far anyhow) and analyze. i think to be a bit more specific, him using his rage and pain as justifications for his villainous actions is definitely what compels me the most: hurt people hurt and the sort, an idea i've always found interesting (something something vicious cycles and the like). yet now, he recognizes this wasn't really. A Just Thing To Do and is beginning to change that, which i enjoy

[bread--quest]

hey.

do you like weird obscure bits of history? do you like first hand accounts of historical events? do you like getting emails from 1800s real estate agents in distress? do you know what the aroostook war is? do you want to?

maybe you should subscribe to my substack! i had to read this journal for school, and then i got really overinvested, and now i'm dragging you all down with me! updates start TOMORROW but will be really really short for the first few days so you won't miss much if you forget it's okay. it's alright. i love you

sign up to get emails from my new historical blorbo who's so obscure he doesn't even have a wikipedia page

[electroniccollectiondonut]

I have not been in this fandom long enough to reasonably judge others' takes however. "EPIC fans are so silly to characterize odysseus as feeling guilty for his actions don't you know he's a war criminal" is definitely a wild one. like first of all to each their own so settle down and let people enjoy things ok. and secondly making choices with a bad outcome, even knowingly and deliberately, does not exclude the possibility of feeling bad about it later. in fact it makes for a much more in depth character because then you get to explore what he does or doesn't feel guilt over, and why, and if that guilt ever edges into regret or not.

[cent-scratchnsniff]

doodle dump

[sydmarch]

it was so stupidly difficult to find any nutritionist who has experience with arfid & takes insurance so after having to go through all these referrals my therapist sent me & jumping through hoops I lowkey hate the lady lmao feels like such a waste of time & energy

[puhpandas]

its been so long since human content/new content with no book relevancy even the youtubers and theorists like dawko and john are getting restless😭

[codecicle]

codecicle you put things on my screen that are so confusing and have no relevance to my interests but its you so i find it so very endearing. keep having so much fun and whimsy on tumblr dot com child :3

you have GOT to get on this horrible TV show dude you don't even understand. it's bad and has 0 redeemable qualities, literally my bread and butter rn. can't get enough of it

[liquidstar]

a friend who'd wait :)