#sorry about when i said briefly explain. i lied Explore tagged Tumblr posts

[liquidstar]

a friend who'd wait :)

[cosmicluvcore]

To be human part 2

Rottmnt Leo x reader, gender neutral, friends to lovers, himbo Leo (?), one sided pining

Part 1 here, Part 3

Summary: Leo has the biggest crush on you but he's afraid that you'd never date a mutant, so with the help of a clooking broach he plans to become your perfect human boyfriend!

☆

Idk if you can tell but this is kinda Aladdin inspired

Also I wasn't sure abt posting this since it has no Y/N interactions umm so sorry if you're dissapointed

I promise the next one will have fluffy moments between Y/N and Leo!! Sorry this is short

Tag list!!

@lunaflyer @wings-of-sapphire @ssak-i @nessarolla-in-constant-flux @envyjmoney

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"¿Qué hice para merecer esto?" Is what the disgruntled Señor Hueso muttered under his breath, as he watched Leo come crashing into his restaurant.

Of all the times that mutant decides to show up, it had to be on a good day. A loud sigh left the skeleton's mouth as he watched the turtle bump into one of his waiters, knocking all the dishes out of her hand.

"Señor! Señor!" Leo called out eagerly as he approached, "I have a really, really important request and you have to-"

He was interrupted by Hueso placing his hand up, narrowing his eyes in annoyance.

"Instead of disturbing my guests, Pepino, let's talk in the staff room."

~

Leo was still wiping spilled spaghetti off himself as he spoke. Amazingly, that didn't stop his excited flow.

"Señor, bone head, buddy! Long time no see, right?" Leo asked in an overly friendly manner, offering Hueso a hand.

Hueso glanced at his hand, which had marinara sauce on it, before glancing back at Leo with an unimpressed expression.

"Uf hijo, did you just come here to cause trouble?" He asked rather bluntly.

Leo chuckled to himself, "Of course not! I just came here for a little... help."

"Help?" Hueso repeated, tilting his head as he watched Leo's over excited behavior.

"Yeah, I was wondering if you could help me get my hands on a cloaking brooch." He explained briefly while wiping away the bit of sauce that was on his shoulder.

"A cloaking brooch?" Hueso repeated raising his brow, "Why would you need one of those? I've seen you walk among humans like it's nothing."

"It's not for that."

Leo bit his lip unsure whether he should let the truth spill, no one knew of his little crush and he was afriad if he started talking about them he wouldn't know when to stop. So he took the easier route.

"It's for uh- You know... science." He lied, smiling awkwardly as if that made his reply more believable.

Señor Hueso simply shot him an unconvinced expression.

"Este idiota..." The skeleton muttered under his breath, "Why don't you just say why you really want it? It would save you from the embarrassment of lying to my face."

Yeah, Hueso wasn't buying it. Figures.

"Okay okay, I'll admit that wasn't my best performance," Leo said with a grin, although his trade mark smirk faded into a small frown as Hueso stared back at him with narrowed eyes.

"Truth is I'm trying to impress someone..." He admitted quietly, his gaze darting to the ground, while he fidgeted with his hands sheepishly.

Hueso blinked in surprise at the turtles sudden shyness, "Trying to impress someone?" He repeated curiously, looking back to the blushing turtle for futher confimration.

Leo bit his lip, his heart fluttering at the thought of them, "A human." He confessed softly.

"I've never felt this way about anyone before, they're just perfect in every way!" He explained brightly, though his happy expression faultered, "But, I don't think they'd be interested in, this whole situation." He frowned, gesturing to himself.

Hueso nodded slowly as he listened, "I see," He hummed in reply, looking thoughtful as he considered Leo's situation for a moment, "So you want to pretend to be human and lie to them?"

Leo frowned at the skeletons blutness, "It's not a lie! I'm just... bending... the truth," He said, his brow furrowing as he spoke.

Even he didn't believe himself this time.

"Alright it's kinda a lie, but what other chance do I have?"

"I don't know, tell them the truth?" Hueso retorted, Leo couldn't help but roll his eyes as he was lectured on the obvious answer, "If you really think this person is worth it, then you should be honest with them."

"The last thing I need to be is honest." The turtle insisted stubbornly, his expression souring at the idea of even attemping to tell his crush how he felt.

Leo hated to picture it, he hated that he knew his voice would tremble as he would try his best to convey to them how deeply he felt.

He hated how he knew he would stammer over his words as he scrambled to find the best way to express his feelings.

And then he would have to wait impatiently for their reply, fearing the worst, after this new discovery.

Not like he could blame Y/N.

Who wouldn't turn down a nervous idiot? And why would anyone ever be interested in someone who looks like him?

"I don't want to risk losing them." Leo finally said, sighing before meeting Hueso gaze again with a serious expression.

"Look, all I need is a brooch. I just want a chance to be with them and make them happy. Please, Señor?"

As Hueso watched Leo's sad expression he was still unsure how to reply, he knew this was an awful idea yet Leo seemed so attached to it. The puppy dog eyes that the blue masked turtle was giving him eventually casused a defeated sigh escape Hueso's mouth.

"Fine, I have a spare somewhere around here," Hueso muttered reluctantly, too tired to keep pushing, turning to his desk and opening a drawer, "Just don't blame me when things go terribly wrong."

Leo's expression immediately brightened.

"Really?!" He leaned over Señor Hueso's shoulder, eagerly watching as the skeleton searched.

Eventually, Hueso found it, a gold gemstone-adorned brooch.

As Leo looked at the badazzled brooch, excitement began to bubble in his chest, the glamorous item really did make this whole situation seem a lot cooler. This was his key to being Y/N's perfect romantic partner, something he'd dreamed of for far too long that was now finally a possibility. His heart soared at the thought.

"Here," Hueso said, handing him the brooch, "Try not to get spaghetti on it, Pepino."

Leo was practically vibrating with excitement as the brooch was placed into his hands. He nodded at Hueso's words despite not really hearing them.

"Thanks Señor! I can keep this right?" He asked.

"Just don't damage it." Hueso warned in reply, "If you do, it could stop-"

But before he got the chance to finish his words, Leo had disappeared into another blue portal.

"-working..."

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

So Me and my boyfriend have been dating since highschool Jr year. It's been a while since then, I'm in trade school and he works at McDonald's. Lately, he's been working very late, for two weeks straight and I understand he's been busy but it feels like he was ignoring me Because the times he was "working" were more than 8-hour long shifts. This cycle kept repeating for 2 weeks and during these 2 weeks, I would express to him that I felt ignored and neglected since he barely had been speaking to me. I was lucky if I got 10 texts a day at most. Which compared to before was very little. I would tell him how I felt and he would apologize saying "sorry babe didn't mean to make you feel that way" and then he would turn around and ignore me again in the same day or the day after. This started to wear on me and it felt like I was being brushed off each time. And this Thursday it all came to a head. For context I suffer from bpd, and being ignored triggers me, I am working on the issue and trying to be better but these past 2 weeks it feels like he was just doing the one thing I asked him not to do, over and over again. And he didn't communicate very well to me, if he was stressed with work or having issues at home I would have understood if he briefly explained. But he didn't I would ask him over and over again if he was okay and he'd just brush me off and say he's fine.

This last thrusday though he did the same thing, from Thursday 9 am to 7. He was "working" and only sent me 4 texts that day. I asked him what was up and why he won't communicate with me and he ignored me MORE. And I had enough and just blew up, I told him that how he was treating me isn't fair, and it's making me unhappy and I feel negelcted and not loved, I told him I felt like he was pushing me away and for what reason I'm not sure. I was fed up and told him if he wanted to break up we could but if he didn't he should call me to work things out. He didn't call me and ignored me more. I took a few hours to myself and then I texted him to explain more, and kind of apologize. I told him that I didn't mean to be so explosive with my anger but I still feel like my dwellings were valid and I explained to him that he just went cold on me for two weeks and didn't explain anything to me. And it feels like I cannot reach him anymore, and that I don't want to break up and work on things if I made him unhappy. But it wasn't fair for him to go cold on me like that. I told him I loved him but there's only so much I can take and I needed space, He once again ignored me. This time going silent for 3 days completely.

I texted him like a day later asking if we could speak the following day. Nothing. I asked him the next day if we could meet to the same day, ignored again. I was worried about him so I texted him again the next day asking if he was at least okay and he ignored me for a couple of hours, before saying he was fine and he's not ready to talk. I respected that and told him I understand and to text when he was ready. I also apologized to him and told him that i was truly sorry for how i acted and that he didnt deserve that. He lied again and said he had work that day (it was Sunday, before the fight happened he told me he ONLY had Sunday off, I'm pretty sure it's illegal to have someone working for 7 days straight) I didn't call him out on this because I was scared I'd upset him more so I just told him I loved him and to have a good day at work.

He ignored me, again.

Please be so honest, am I the asshole? I feel like the asshole for blowing up on him and I know it was wrong for me to do that to him but I just felt stuck and emotionally stuck after being hurt by him almost daily and telling him so only to get ignored. On my end this feels shitty, and I do wish I could take back what happened but I can't. I also feel this is unfair, everytime My feelings get hurt and I express them he doesn't go to the same lengths to Apologize or make it up to me or even make a long term change, but when I hurt his feelings he acts like this and acts like I just committed some war crime against him. Maybe im being unfair but I feel unheard. I'm afraid this may be the end of our relationship and i dont want that.

What are these acronyms?

[nnatasha]

mythal/andraste/flemeth

contains spoilers for the veilguard quest 'regrets of the dread wolf'

an already widely circulated fan theory regarding mythal and andraste is that andraste herself was a carrier of a mythal fragment, before flemeth and the morrigan. briefly, people kind of believe this because of the whole 'justice' thing surrounding andraste's march, and how maferath's betryal has parallels to mythal's with the evanuris and flemeth's own betryal, whereupon mythal's fragment found her. not really good at explaining this lol but the popularity of this theory makes it easy to look up if i didnt make sense. (solas girlies there's also a spin on the theory that solas was shartan, andrastes bald elven companion but id take that w a grain of salt considering he was in a coma)

these are two photos of andraste, and im going to be focusing on her three-pointed headpiece, something she is almost always depicted wearing. the third photo is of meredith stannard, who modeled her look on andraste (again, headpiece. she lived and died a diva)

in veilguard, the dread wolf regret quest ends with your rook meeting a fragment of mythal, seperate to the one morrigan now has. the head piece isnt as obvs as andrastes but has three points, like flemeth's in the second pic (the most godawful quality known to man lol sorry)

the whole point of this is to talk abt statues which i LOVE in da like i obsess over them to a weird amount.

these r three statues of mythal found near the end of the game, but similar ones r found sooner on in the story i just didnt take any pics of them. HELLO the first one is literally andraste's iconic pose i will say no more✋ (even her dragon statues have three points on the head. AND the sick mythal statue that looks like the irl nike one (not pictured) has a 3 pointed headpiece i rest my case)

bioware historically ties EVERYTHING to the ancient elves so i feel like this is a plausible theory tbh. when andraste died i just assume mythal's spirit fragment floated about

ALSO (remember how i said i was done? I lied.) this piece of art i did i based around andraste photos on da wiki ONLY and yet she has mythal's headpiece hon hon hon

[frost-queen]

What lies deep within the heart // part 3 (Reader!Skywalker x Cal Kestis)

Requested by: Anon Forever tag:@missmelodramatic, @merlin-dahlia, @alex--awesome--22 @elllie-does-the-posts, @floatlosers, @merlieve, @queen-of-books, @glimmering-darling-dolly@denkisclown, @wildieflower, @meyocoko, @bubblybrianna, @justanothercoco@subjecta13-thefangirl, @m-rae23, @harleyquinnswifeyfrfr, @swampthing07, @melsunshine, @panhoeofmanyfandoms, @venomsvl, @the-uncoordinated-house-cat, @rosecentury,  @imagines-by-her, @vviolynn, @evilcr0ne, @fatelmistake12345

Summary: Cal is over the moon meeting the legendary Obi Wan Kenobi. Obi Wan and you share a conversation about your father's past. Back on the Mantis you confide with Cal about your father's past. When the Mantis makes a quick stop, Cal and you head into town which seems normal at first. Till you notice the posters of you hanging around. Will you be discovered or remain unnoticed from the Empire. [ Part 1 part 2 part 4 ]

“Hello there.”

Cal’s eyes widened, spontaneously grabbing for your arm. He started tugging at it, still staring in awe at the newly appeared figure. – “What is it?” – you whispered to him confused. – “That is Master Obi Wan Kenobi!” – Cal fangirled feeling as if he were about to pass out. Obi wan waved you closer. You took Cal by the arm as he wasn’t sure his legs would even move in this condition. BD-1 hopped on Cal’s back when you approached the cave. Obi Wan extended his hand out to you, helping you up. He helped Cal up as well.

Cal squeaked behind you admiring his own hand. Rolling softly with your eyes, you knew Cal would be useless at this point. Too fixated over being in awe of this Master Obi Wan Kenobi. Someone you’ve never heard of. But to be fair, you hadn’t heard of many Jedi. Was it perhaps something your father wanted to shield from you. The only few people you knew where the stormtroopers and Palpatine. Yet he was no Jedi. Obi Wan gestured for you to follow him. – “You… you have a nice place.” – you said nervously, not sure what to say.

It wasn’t really compliment worthy, but you hated the silence. Obi Wan chuckled brief. He guided you to an area in deeper into the cave, lighted up by lanterns. Some junk scattered around. Obi Wan chuckled nervously. – “Apologies for the mess.” – he spoke kicking a part aside. – “That’s alright.” – you answered. He gestured for you to take a seat as you did. Cal was still standing, looking in wonder around. – “Uhum… Cal…” – you said tugging at his shirt. Cal hummed loud turning his head to you. You motioned with your head to the seat beside you.

“Oh right.” – he mumbled out coming to sit beside you. You took a deep breath when Obi Wan came sitting before you. – “May I just say it is an honor meeting you, Master Kenobi.” – Cal said with a silly smile on his lips. He extended his hand shaking Obi Wan’s hand once more. It was rather sweet how Cal gleamed in his presence. – “Cal…Cal…” – you whispered placing your hand on his shoulder. You needed to remind him this wasn’t a casual meeting. – “Right… sorry.” – he whispered back letting go of Obi Wan’s hand. Cal cleared his throat, setting a hand on his knee. – “We’ve been told you have information of Y/n’s father.” – Cal spoke getting all serious.

Obi Wan turned to look at you. – “I do.” – he responded as it made you move nervously in your seat. Rubbing your sweaty palms over your legs. – “May…may I ask a question first?” – Obi Wan asked looking at you. You nodded hesitantly, unsure what he would ask. – “How… how did you end up here. I had always assumed he’d keep you close to his side.” – Obi Wan spoke with furrowed brows. – “He did.” – you answered softly. – “Before… before…” – your gaze glanced briefly to Cal. – “I had never let his side. Always close. I knew nothing of the world around me… I still feel like I don’t… so pardon me if I don’t know who you were…are.” – you explained further.

Cal took your hand, giving it a soft squeeze. – “I got her out. I offered her an escape from that prison, and she took it.” – he spoke explaining more. – “Only after you tried to kill me.” – you said teasingly poking him in the rib. – “Which I didn’t since you charmed me.” – he responded with a teasing expression. – “Did I now?” – you leaned a bit closer. – “I have no memory of that.” – you laughed out. Cal touched your nose making you wrinkle it, pulling back. Obi Wan cleared his throat interrupting your little moment.

Cal and you turned back to him as he let go of your hand. – “Young man.” – Obi Wan addressed as Cal corrected him. – “Cal Kestis.” – Obi Wan hummed loud. – “Cal, do you mind if I have a moment alone with Y/n?” – Cal looked at you. – “Only if she wants it. I promised her I’d stay close.” – You smiled warmly at him. Your gaze drifted away to Obi Wan. – “I’ll be alright I think.” – you said out loud. Cal hummed loud, getting up. – “BD and I will just be outside.” – tapping your shoulder, he took his leave giving you and Obi Wan the space to speak.

Obi Wan got up, offering for you to follow him. You did heading to a more secluded part of the caves. You came to a stop by some crates. Now that Obi Wan was able to admire you in the light, he smiled. – “You look so much like him.” – he said making you look saddened down. – “I’m not so sure that is a compliment.” – you told him fearful. Obi Wan rested a hand on your shoulder. – “The path your father took is not your path Y/n.” – he said wisely yet it didn’t calm your frightened heart yet.

Obi Wan took a deep breath walking with you towards the entrance of the cave. The sun blinding your eyes for a second while they adjusted to the bright sight. Down below you saw Cal with BD-1. He was walking about with little thought. – “Your father was a remarkable Jedi.” – Obi Wan said making you widen your eyes. – “My father was a Jedi?” – you gasped out. – “He was full of ambition and love.” – Obi Wan chuckled a bit to himself.

Both of you sat down on the rock by the entrance of the cave. – “Always full of questions. Asking about why it couldn’t go that way or why that wasn’t possible.” – Obi Wan continued. – “To my annoyance sometimes.” – Obi Wan laughed loud as you smiled. Obi Wan smiled back. – “Your smile it reminds me of her.” – he pointed out. – “My mother?” – you asked already knowing he might be referring to her. – “Your father loved her so much. They were very much alike. Full of ambition.” – Obi Wan smiled faintly.

“Yet their relationship also harbored fear.” – he added making you pull your legs closer to your chest. – “His fear of losing her brought him to the path of the Sith. He was persuaded in being able to save her… in the end…” – Obi Wan sighed deep thinking back of it. – “His love became his weakness?” – you said looking at Cal, wondering if you would have the same fate as your father. – “No.” – Obi Wan made clear laying a hand on your knee.

“The Sith took advantage of his fear. His love was never a weakness. It is his greatest strength, even now. When he cared so lovingly for you Y/n.” – his words eased your worries a bit. Obi Wan turned to look at Cal afar. Cal waved at you as you moved your hand up to wave back. Obi Wan chuckled. – “I can see he cares deeply for you.” – you nodded. – “He kept me from falling… I couldn’t have come this far without him.”

“Just like your mother and father.” – Obi Wan muttered with a smile. Obi Wan got up as you did the same confused. – “I have a gift for your further travels.” – he spoke before disappearing into the cave once more. You waved at Cal to let him know he could come back up. Cal rushed up the hill with BD on his back. – “Are you okay?” – he asked resting a hand on your lower back. You nodded with a hum. – “I understand more why my father chose the path of the Sith.” – you explained to Cal. – “Remember you are not him. His choices will not be repeated inside of you.” – Cal responded letting his head rest against yours.

You took a deep breath, taking a moment to embrace his warm gesture. Obi Wan returned making Cal and you part. – “It is yours to have.” – Obi Wan said holding out an item wrapped in a dirty old cloth. – “It once belonged Anakin Skywalker. Your father. It is only righteous it passes on to you Y/n Skywalker.” – he addressed moving the cloth open to reveal a lightsaber. Your eyes widened with shock. Cal gawked at it in disbelief. Obi Wan offered you the lightsaber. – “Whether you yield it or not that choice is yours to take.” – he continued.

You looked hesitantly at Cal who nodded in encouragement. Your hand reached out to the lightsaber, feeling a familiar sensation. The moment your fingers touched it, a memory flashed before your eyes. Your father young and full of ambition. A warm smile on his lips as he holds his lightsaber up. The memory passed with the blink of an eye. The lightsaber felt heavy in your hand when you picked it up.

You turned to look hesitant at Cal. Somehow it felt a bit wrong for you to carry your father’s lightsaber. Cal nodded with a warm smile. It was yours to take. You clicked the lightsaber on your belt where it hung safely. – “May the force be with you.” – Obi Wan said as a farewell. Cal bowed his head in respect. You smiled a bit saddened at Obi Wan. Being around him made you feel a bit more connected to your father. Closer to the life you never knew he had. Obi Wan seemed to understand it, taking your hand to pat it. – “This is not a goodbye Y/n.” – you nodded as your hand slipped out of his.

Cal and you returned to the Mantis in silence. Back on the Mantis you immediately sat down with a deep sigh. Rubbing your temples in exhaustion. Cal shoved himself close to your body, placing a hand on your arm. – “What did he say?” – he asked. You exhaled deep letting yourself lean back in the seat. Calmly you explained to Cal what Obi Wan had told you. About your father before order 66. About your mother and the tragedy that led him to the life of a Sith.

Cal stared with wide eyes at you. A shock it was hearing how your father used to be. He always thought pure evil harbored inside him. Now it appeared it wasn’t that way. Now he felt like he understood you more. He hugged you out of comfort when Cere joined in. – “I hope you got some answers?” – was the only thing she asked. She needn’t know any details, but still wondered. You hummed loud. – “I did.”

The Mantis landed on Coruscant. A stop for Greez to get some supplies. The stock was running low, so he needed to refill them. Cere took it upon her to collect the supplies while Greez checked the state of the Mantis. Cal, BD-1, and you ventured into town to search for an extra part. Greez had scribbled it on a note with a poor hand drawn picture of it. Cal showed it to you, making you laugh loud. – “Let’s hope the seller can decipher this.” – Cal joked tugging it away. – “Otherwise Greez will have a problem.” – you answered following Cal into town. The town was partly crowded.

Cal looked around, spotting a shop who most likely had the spare part. He motioned for you to follow. You looked over your shoulder noticing something. Narrowing your eyes you hoped to see it clearer. A poster stuck to the side of a building. The lower part flapping in the wind. You couldn’t recognize what it read, but still it caught your attention. Cal was already heading down towards it, unaware that you weren’t following right away. Turning round you spotted another poster. You moved a bit closer to it to read.

Taking about three steps, your eyes suddenly widened. Your face and name plastered on the poster. It made you gasp loud, stumbling a bit back. Your head felt like spinning at the sight of your own poster up. The more you looked around, the more you noticed how many posters of you were up. – “Cal!” – you called out jogging after him. Cal stopped confused with a frown.

He slowly turned seeing you jog over to him. – “Hey, You!” – he heard coming from behind you. A few bounty hunters  gathering around behind you. – “Y/n run!” – Cal shouted pulling out his lightsaber. You started running as Cal blocked their shots. You joined Cal, taking his hand. He pulled you with him, running into an alley.

It was there where he saw the posters for himself. He cursed silently going round in a new alleyway with you. Cal and you came to an immediate stop at the sight of a pack of stormtroopers. They turned spotting you. – “Princess!” – one of them called out as it made Cal quirk his eyebrow briefly up. They started shooting at Cal as Cal deflected their blasts with his lightsaber.

You felt trapped, air sucked out of your lungs. Pulled back to the life you lead with your father. Behind the shooting troopers you noticed one of them speaking over the intercom. – “Tell Lord Vader we have found her. The princess is on Coruscant!” – he shouted in the intercom as it made you gasp loud. He knew. He knew where you were.

----------------------------------------------------

Read more of my fics on my Masterlists!  

[xxgoblin-dumplingxx]

Can Ma Kent be the sweet old southern woman oddduck needs? Someone who listens and lets her talk about Bruce and her frustrations with Clark and Lois but not try to solve it or pry for more info or anything? I just want oddduck to have a safe space rn lol

"Ma I'm sorry I-"

Martha waved away his concerns cheerfully and kissed his cheek, "You know we'll be fine. Pa will be perfectly happy to watch the game and I'll go see Y/N-" Her eyes narrowed when her son winced, looking a little ashamed of himself.

"Ma I don't know if-"

"Even if she's irritated at you right now she'll be thrilled to see me," she snorted.

Clark nodded slowly and stooped to kiss her cheek, "Call if you need anything-"

"We''ll be fine," she assured him, watching him go. Shaking her head and picking up her jacket and her handbag.

"Kids fighting, you think?" her husband asked.

"Not fighting," Martha said, kissing the top of his head and making sure he had a cold drink at hand. "I think, Clark has been meddling where he shouldn't-"

"With what?"

"Never you mind," she said smiling a little. What Lois had let slip and what she'd gleaned from talking to you briefly would have been enough to make the rest of his hair go grey.

"Martha-"

"Can't hear you I'm going to so watch a Lecture," she said, heading towards the University where you taught.

_________________

Martha snuck in and hung near the back. It was a big room and the students you were teaching were in various states of paying attention. But the ones that were? They were enraptured. And Martha understood it. She'd watched you hone this for years- ever since you were a little girl.

She didn't know if it was innate or if you practiced it in the mirror. But either way, she enjoyed it.

"Alright All, remember. Mid Terms are next week. And there are 3 essay questions- You only have to do ONE. If you do all three and get them right, there's extra credit in it for you-"

She watched you dismiss your class and waited, watching you gather your papers and your laptop, making her way down the steps, "Excuse me professor?" she teased. Beaming at you when you look up.

"I thought-"

"They got called in to work," she explained, "so I thought I'd come bother you. Make you get a slice of pie and some coffee with me."

You smile and pull out your laptop again, "Just let me email my next class and let them know they get a day off."

_______________

Martha listened for a little while. She knew there was a lot you weren't saying. About how annoyed you were with her son and his wife.

"I told them to get a dog if they want something to parent," you tell her.

"Good," she said, smiling a little. "Now about this man-"

"He doesn't even like me that way so I don't understand-"

Martha shook her head fondly. If he wasn't sweet on you, he wasn't as smart as Clark said. You're a cutie. Not a model. But there was a girl next door quality. A sweetness. A warmth. And you were smart? He'd have to be blind and stupid. And she could see, from the way you flustered a little talking about him, the way your cheeks heated that you liked him. "What's your mother say?"

You shrug, "I'm sure she'd have a lot to say if I told her anything-"

"Y/N."

"I mean why would I tell her after-"

"That wasn't your fault," Martha said softly, patting your hand. Trying not to worry about the fact that you'd only taken a couple bites of your pie and were now aimlessly picking. You were upset. This was bothering you.

"I chose-"

"You chose him because he lied to you, baby," she reminded you. "And then he left you."

You nod and Martha squeezed your hand again, hoping that Bruce knew what he was doing. He was going to have his work cut out for him if he was going to convince you of anything. And she hoped you were wrong. That he did like you enough to do the work.

[brain-in-a-skin-suit]

Okay so disclaimer i haven't seen Dead Apple in a while, and I also didn't go into writing this with a conclusion in mind, so its a bit of a mess.but! i did reach a conclusion! Sorry for any inaccuracies, I was working from memory for a lot of this. please correct me if im wrong about something! Also pretty please add any connected theories if you have any

Warning: long post

I remember watching Dead Apple and being really thrown off by the fact that Fyodor's ability seemed to be chill with him. Every character aside from him who had an ability manifestation was fighting their ability. This makes me think that in his natural state (not affected by Shibusawa's ability), Fyodor is already fighting his own ability, so when Shibusawa was doing his thing, the relationship flipped and they got along.

In chapter 108 of the manga, fyodor suddenly says he's controlled by "a demon" and follows it up with this:

then he says this:

which is really key. It implies everything i suspected from Dead Apple-- Fyodor's ability is his enemy.

Of course, right after this scene, he stabs Sigma and basically says "teehee I was lying the whole time"

But I don't know if I truly believe he was lying (which isn't a hot take, I've seen other people who believe the same thing). What he said earlier really fit with the conclusions that could be drawn from Dead Apple. There is a real possibility that he when his ability regained control it just, ya know, lied.

Okay fine, whatever, what is his ability?? who, or what, is he? to be fully honest, I don't know.

But here's what we do know -- or for many of these, what we suspect (in number list so i can easily refer back to them)

1. Fyodor might be immortal. A very popular theory based mainly around the fact that he is everywhere in the BSD timeline but never seems to age

2. His ability probably works against him in some way, likely taking over his body due to some "weakness" that was brought forth by the ability, and then taken advantage of. I am going to refer to the "good" Fyodor we briefly see in ch 108 as 108!fyodor just to make things easier for myself.

3. He can kill non-gifted with a touch of his hand. I don't think he can kill gifted the same way (he had to shoot the cat-lady, plus every ability-kill we've seen thus far has been of non-gifted victims)

4. Nikolai does not know how to kill him (still unclear on the whole poisoning plotline-- I have seen the theory that Nikolai didn't poison them earlier, but the "antidote" is poison. Still not fully clear on how all of this fits together), and wants Sigma to find out his ability so he can kill him.

5. In Dead Apple, he was split into "Crime" and "Punishment". One person was an ability manifestion just like everyone else had been dealing with, the other was Fyodor himself acting as part of his ability-- which is odd because the ability is supposed to sever the gift from the gifted. and yet fyodor was still part of it, just fragmented. This supports the fyodor is not fully human idea presented by Sigma's question of "what are you?" and the immortaity theory. It also supports an alter-ego, as he had two personalities there.

6. fyodor has some vendetta against the gifted despite being a gifted himself

7. gifts are typically a result of some type of trauma or past experience. we do not really know his backstory.

so point 4. Nikolai doesn't know how to kill him. Assuming everything 108!fyodor said was true, this dagger could kill him:

sword Kladenets is an established sword type, typically belonging to a hero (interesting that fyodor has one...)

"In some heroic poems and ancient Russian legends, a sword Kladenets acts as a self-cutting sword, which, on the orders of its owner, can cut down an entire forest or at least the whole enemy army. Other weapons could heal or make their owners or holders – invulnerable."

interesting stuff. invincibility? Well, fyodor may be immortal (see point #1), so that could go hand in hand with that. It would also explain why a sword Kladenets would be needed to kill him-- any other weapon would fall short.

Also, fyodor's "ability" involves being able to kill other people easy-peasy by tapping them (point #3)-- which is the same thing the sword kladenets does. Remember, every person he's killed with his ability bled out where he touched them-- as if they were cut with a blade!!

But why can't he kill ability users? my theory is that abilities are on the same level as a sword kladenets, and therefore the sword cannot do it on its own. Fyodor can only be killed by the sword kladenets that he wields and not by an ability; he cannot kill an ability user with the sword. makes enough sense to me

okay, what else can we learn from the sword?

Everything I read about the sword describe that the hero has to find the sword; by digging it from the ground or taking it from a dead body, or some other way of earning it. Then the sword will work with the hero. But Fyodor's ability (which I am beginning to believe is simply the sword he wields) works against him (see point #2), which makes me think he obtained the sword without earning it. This could be the "weakness" that was brought forth by his ability and allowed for his ability to overtake him-- which makes sense!! he would not have that weakness had he not obtained the sword!

The sword is also often given a personality-- it is a character in itself (which would explain the alter-ego point #5)

furthermore, how could he have a sword in prison if it wasn't part of his ability??

So! what I am trying to say is that fyodor somehow wrongly obtained a sword kladenets (or perhaps in this universe, the sword kladenets), and is now controlled by it. this led to him form an alter ego (the sword's personality), which overtook him due to the fact that he did not earn the sword, and was not powerful enough to control it. The sword gave him the ability to be unkillable (and therefore immortal/unaging), and the ability to kill non-gifted easily by simple contact.

i would like to emphasize that i am very likely wrong, as this is BSD we're talking about after all. I am working from memory and a very small amount of research, and also using this as an excuse to procrastinate. Take this with a grain of salt. but also, please add onto this if you have thoughts. I have not read Crime and Punishment (I have copy but I've been busy) or any other Dostoevsky book, so if you have and you think this relates to his books in any way (or that it contradicts them) I'd love to hear it!

[severevoiddragon]

SONGS

First of all, here's the full playlist:

I'll just go through the songs I have full animatics for ! * Means it appears on someone else's list too. Sorry for the amount of (spoilers) I can expand upon them if you don't care bout spoilers :D and if there's any ones you want the full animatic to I can spend 5 hours telling you that too 🥰 not all these songs were chosen by me. They were mostly chosen by one of my besties who originally made the playlist for me n then I made my own version adding my songs. So. Yeah.

All:

She Doesn't Sleep (Anthony Amorim) - This is pretty much describes Arc 1, with Rin coming to Callie like "hey my bestie is acting Weird" n Callie constantly trying to find answers

Curses (The Crane Wives) - This is mostly Cyan focused but also explains arc 2's plot! Spoilers !

Little Lion Man (Mumford & Sons) - Cyan focused recap of the ENTIRE SERIES WOOOO. So spoilers.

Callie:

For the. Main character. Girlie doesn't have their own song animatic

Look Who's Inside Again* (Bo Burnham) (See Charles) - Just in there to show Parallels™

Choke - Acoustic* (I don't know how but they found me) (See Cyan / Other)

Cyan:

Lonely* (Brad Sucks) (See Rin) - Rin and Cyan meeting, and their arcs over arc 2 :D

Body (Mother Mother) - Cyan feeling like they're not in control of themselves sometimes

Waltzing Memories (Priscilla Ahn) - Cyan remembers their sister <3

Our Town (James Taylor) - Cyan remembers what the town used to be like, n tell Rin a bit about themselves

Deep Inside My Heart (Priscilla Ahn) - It's just very cyan coded

Two Birds* (Regina Spektor) (See Rin) - Arc 2 but they are a QPR your honour. Rin is able to move on from Everwich but Cyan isn't </3

Rin:

Nothing Left To Lose* (Tangled: The Series) (See Em) - Arc 2 so spoilers. Cyan is Jeremy Jordan's character (Varian)

Exile, Vilify (The National) - Just Cyan being a weirdo loner who lives in the walls. Like Rattmann from Portal, who this song was written for !

Hiding In Your Hands (Pasek & Paul) - Rin lamenting how she feels depressed despite appearing to have a perfect life (arc 1)

Alone* (Nico Collins) (See Jamie) - Shows the Walker-Ives family n how. Dysfunctional. It is. Including Rins older brother, and how it's the same story throughout all 3 kids and how Rin has to always pick up the pieces

Lonely* (Brad Sucks) (See Cyan)

Sweet Hibiscus Tea (Penelope Scott) - Rin just being a depressed loser tbh (affectionate)

People I Don't Like (UPSHAL) - Rin going to parties when she moves to the city pre arc2 (features cyan briefly)

Our Word (36 Questions) - Yeah Rin's family really aren't the best are they? (The animatic deliberately doesn't line up w the lyrics BC it's like. This is what We said happened, this is what Actually happened)

Seventeen* (Heathers) (See Em) - Rin and Emilia being cute while dating <3

One Thing* (36 Questions) (See Em) - Rin and Emilia having an argument after Rin comes back from the city in arc 2

Brutal (Olivia Rodrigo) - Rin leaving Everwich feeling very upset n annoyed at everyone else

Woke Up (Adventure Time) - The Breakup <3

Choke - Acoustic* (I Don't Know How But They Found Me) (See Cyan/Other)

Two Birds* (Regina Spektor) (See Cyan)

I've Had Enough* (Melina KB) (See Em) - The Breakup Part 2 <3

Emilia:

Monster (Frozen the Musical) - Uhhh arc 1 spoilers were close to discovering so I'm keeping these very spoilers

Asher:

Love Like You (Rebecca Sugar) - Em simping for Rin <3

Cloud 9 (Beach Bunny) - See above tbh

Chosen Last (Sara Kays) - Em feeling like an outsider of the friend group BC she joined late

Seventeen* (Heathers) (See Rin)

One Thing* (36 Questions) (See Rin)

Moral of the Story (Ashe) - Em convincing herself that it's okay if a relationship didn't work out

Words Fail (Dear Evan Hansen) - Em apologising at the end of arc 2

Rearview (Beach Bunny) - Em being upset after The Breakup™

The Dismemberment Song (Blue Kid) - This is just villain au em but it's fun

Little Miss Perfect (Joriah Kwamé) - Em discovering she likes Rin :D

Prom Queen (Beach Bunny) - There's a lot of Beach Bunny. Em and her body image issues that i never talk about

Nothing Left to Lose* (Tangled: The Series) (See Cyan)

I've Had Enough* (Melina KB) (See Rin)

Xavier:

Sports Go Sports (Garfunkel and Oats) - Asher cheering Xavier on during his sports games <3

The Bro Duet* (George Salazar, Jason Grotay) (See Xavier) - Just Xavier and Asher being gay idiots in love (affectionate) (arc 1 version)

I'll Cover You* (Rent) (See Xavier) - Just Xavier and Asher being gay idiots in love (affectionate) (arc 2 version)

Heather (Conan Gray) - um. Spoilers.

Happier (Olivier Rodrigo) - um. More spoilers. For the same reason.

Jamie:

The Bro Duet* (George Salazar, Jason Grotay) (See Asher)

I'll Cover You* (Rent) (See Asher)

Charles:

Alone (Nico Collins) (See Rin)

Disobedient (Steven Universe) - Arc 2 Jamie after Rin leaves and then comes back (she's not okay)

Kitty:

This Is Home (Cavetown) - Charles at Kitty's Ball, and The Aftermath

Duet* (Omori) (See Kitty) - THEY ARE MARI AND SUNNY CODED OKAY. Charles plays piano, Kitty plays violin. It just fits.

Look Who's Inside Again* (Bo Burnham) (See Callie) - Charles being a kid who was stuck in his room. There isn't much more to say about it. (Also shows the parallels between him n Callie)

In The Bedroom Down The Hall (Pasek & Paul) - Not TECHNICALLY Charles BC it's his mum, but it's Charles' mum lamenting the empty room after he disappeared, and then Em's mum lamenting her growing apart from Aiden (Em's twin brother), and Rin's mum lamenting the constant fights it is with Rin's brother

Duet* (Omori) (See Charles)

First Burn (Lin Manuel-Miranda) - An AU where Kitty actually sent a love letter to her lover, and Other messed it all up for her.

Floating (Pretty Balanced) - Kitty and her lover </3 it's a tragic tale

Cyan / Other (This is either Other itself, Other And Cyan or Cyan About Other):

Under My Skin (Jukebox The Ghost) - Other being a menace

Evelyn Evelyn (Evelyn Evelyn) - During Arc 1 when Cyan realised Other is a dirty liar and isn't actually good (it manipulated cyan into thinking that. Because it's a dirty little liar.)

Goodbye (Bo Burnham) - spoilers :)

Choke - Acoustic* (I Don't Know How But They Found Me) (See Callie & Rin) - Other possessing Cyan during arc 2. It doesn't go well.

Nocturnal Me (Echo and the Bunnymen) - Other being a menace to Cyan

Every Breath You Take (The Police) - Other being a menace to Cyan

Play With Me (Extreme) - Other being a menace to Cyan)

We'll Meet Again (Vera Lynn) - ohhh this is Other at the end of arc 1 :)

Insane (Black Gryph0n) - Look I dislike the creator of Hazbin for many reasons and the series reminds me of an ex friend now but. You gotta admit this song is Other all over. Specifically Other at the start of act 2 when Cyan returns

Some fun facts about SoE that have no meaning in no order just when I thought of them

Rin n co studied Jekyll and Hyde for English GCSE (which was at the same time as SoE was happening). Because of this, when she was an adult, she recommended the book to Cyan, who hadn't read it before. They read it n went "omg lol this is me", much to Rin's concern

Cyan has an older sister who I don't talk about enough- but also they don't remember her at all so it doesn't matter (<- definitely has a name for her yep)

Callie is an unreliable narrator (ik I said this a couple days ago but expanding on it a lil - there are some parts she is intentionally hiding from the audience. she has slipped up a couple times while trying to keep these hidden things hidden)

I've written up to episode 11 (the denouement) but I'm unsure of pacing and everything so :( idk :( I like Episode 6 so I'm posting at least all 3 parts of that (there's one more Episode 6 hehe)

I have a whole Bad Ending AU which I'm tempted to get you guys to vote on which ending. Except I won't tell you which ending you get. This will only come into play at the end of arc 2 and tbh this is motivating me to finish arc 1-

Cyan loves fireworks and once they're besties w Callie, she invites them to their annual new year's celebrations. The town of Everwich is invited but Cyan used to just sneak in. It makes Cyan happy they finally are allowed to come <3

Kitty was NOT interested in James Beaumont, the guy she was likely to marry. She did not know this. She thought all girls wanted to hug and kiss their friends. This is because she was in the Georgian era.

Charles n Callie have SO MANY PARALLELS. BUT I CANT SHARE THEM. BECAUSE SPOILERS.

Callie is the only one other than cyan to be able to see Other :)

If anyone wants to hear about the music for my ocs pls ask BC I have a lot of Thoughts™ about those

[acethedishwasher]

Just Kids | Carl Grimes x F!!Reader (Part 4)

Warning: mentions of death, gore, language, fluff, normal walking dead stuff

Description: y/n is Jesus's little sister (it's explained more in the story) the line up, Death

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

Word Count: 1,637

The next day was going smoothly till Enid ran out of Maggie's house yelling about Maggie being in pain. I was the first to make it over and Rick was second. “We should get her to the hilltop.” I said, holding her up as she yelled in pain. Rick pulled around the RV and I helped get her loaded, refusing to then leave her side. Carl got on the RV late and once everyone was on we made our way to the hilltop. 

    Two of the roads to the hilltop had been blocked like warnings. Maggie was getting worse and we had one more try to get to the hilltop. “What if we walk?” I suggested. “They are expecting the RV. It could work.” Eugene said, agreeing with my plan. Eugene and Rick talked while we got Maggie ready so she wouldn have to walk. Everyone left the RV and Carl came to my side. Making it just me, him and a closed eyes maggie in the RV. He looked around briefly before kissing my forehead. “Now I know you're going to stomp on my foot, but I'd like it if you stayed with Eugene in the RV.” I wanted to stomp on his foot but I was thinking the same thing. “Ok, but you promise you will get Maggie to Dr. Carson.” I said, his eyes went wide. “You didn't kick me. '' he said. “When have I ever kicked you?” I asked him, he went to name them off when Rick called for him. “I'll see you tomorrow.” He said as the rest of the group took Maggie into the woods. 

      We drove to the next road that would lead to the hilltop and like we had suspected it was blocked. I climbed out of the RV and looked at everyone that was blocking the road. “Where's everyone else?” one of the men asked. “Still in the RV.” I lied quickly. Unfortunately a man had snuck behind me and pulled Eugene from the driver's seat. “Lie to us again.” the man said, I turned and saw Negan. “You got some giant sized lady balls to lie to a big group of men.” he said, holding eugene on the ground. I said nothing and glared at him. “Now, I don't want to hit you but I will. Where is your group?” Negan asked, I shrugged my shoulders and like he said he hit me, one time real hard in the face. “Oh, I hope I don't break that pretty little face of yours.”

      Again I ignored him and glared, spitting blood. “You're one scary lady, Maybe I can get answers from your friend here.” Negan said, looking at Eugene. “Woods.” Eugene said, quickly I glared at him. “Shut up Eugene!” I hissed. “No, keep talking.” Negan said, I glared daggers at both Eugene and Negan. “I'm sorry Y/n, They're going through the woods.” He explained, though Negan seemed uninterested by that. “Did you say Y/n, as in y/n rovia.” Negan asked, Eugene nodded. “How's your mother's head.” he asked and I lunged forward at him yelling. “You son of a bitch, you have no right to talk about my mother!” Negan smiled at me as some of his men loaded Eugene back in the RV. “Oh, hit a button.” he said with a sick smirk. “Load her up!” He yelled out making his men grab me arms and put me in the RV, Negan then climbed in and started driving us into the woods.

     After driving for a bit he sent his men out to ‘help guide’ Rick and them here. He radioed to more of his men and told them his coranits as a woman pulled me from the RV and moved me to my knees, a gun loosely pointed at the back of my head. Eugene was forced down next to me and a man put a gun to his head. “I truly am sorry y/n.” Eugene said, holding his head in his hands. “No talking.” the man said, pushing the gun harder into Eugene's head. 

  It took a long time but eventually I heard whistling grow louder and the group broke into the clearing. Instantly Carl's eyes landed on me as he looked over my face. Seeing the blood from my nose. One man came out of the shadows and instructed them to put Maggie down and get in line. Once they did that he had one person kick them onto their knees till everyone was down. “DWIGHT.” the man called. “Ya?” he said walking out from behind the group. “‘Chop-Chop.” Dwight opened the van doors and pulled out four people. Daryl, Rosita, Michonne and Glenn. “Maggie?” Glenn questioned as his look shifted from the ground to his pregnant wife. 

   “Alright, we got a full boat. Let's meet the man.” The man said, knocking on the RV door. Negan opened the door and took a step out. “We pissing our pants yet.” He asked with a sick smile. Carl grabbed my hand and squeezed it before dropping it. “ Boy do I have a feeling we're getting close.” Negan smiled as he walked closer to the group. “It's gonna be pee-pee pants city here real soon. Which one of you pricks is the leader.” one of Negan's men pointed to rick. “It's this one he's the guy.” He said, Negan turned and walked over to rick. “Hi, you're Rick, right? I'm Negan and I do not appreciate you killing my men. Also, when I sent my people to kill you for killing my people. you killed more of my people. Not cool, Not cool. You have no idea how not cool that is, but I think you're going to be up to speed here shortly. Yeah you are so going to regret crossing me in a few minutes. Yes you are.” Negan smiled, quickly I whipped the dripping blood from my face and whipped it on my pants. “You see Rick, whatever you do, no matter what. You don't mess with new world order, and the new world order is This and it's really very simple, so even if you're stupid. Which you very well may be, you can understand it. You read?” Negan asked.    

   “Here it goes, pay attention.” Negan said, dropping the bat from his shoulders and pointing it at rick. “Give me your shit or I will kill you. Today was career day. We invested a lot so you would know who I am and know what I could do. You work for me now. You have shit you give it to me, that's your job. Now I know there is a mighty big pill to swallow. But swallow it you most certainly will.” My mind drowned out his voice. Focusing on Carl and his shallow breaths. At one point I think Negan spoke to carl. He also tried to talk to me but I ignored him and glared.    

    My brain finally tooned in as he started playing Eenie meenie miney mo. whenever he pointed it at Maggie, Glenn, Carl, or Rick  I would flinch. It was hilltops meeting all over again. I watched as it landed on Abraham and where I didn't have a very good relationship with him, he didn't deserve to die this way. Nobody deserved to die this way. I watched as Negan brough his bat down on Abraham’s head Once then twice killing him. “Did you hear that, he said suck my nuts!” Negan laughed out. He was about to go into another monologue when Daryl got up and punched him. “That shit is not going to slide. I noticed him inch closer to Glenn and jumped up. “NOT HIM, ME!” I yelled, catching Negan's attention. Carl grabbed my hand and pulled me back down. As Negan made his way over to me I gave Carl's hand a comfort squeeze and smiled at him with tears in my eyes. “And who is it you think I was going to kill?” he asked. "Glenn." I responded, Negan's eyes widened slightly and he smiled. "Well I was, but since you requested to be killed instead I guess I could make the accommodations." Tears fall from Carl's eyes rapidly. Negan raised the bat and I watched as it came down on the top of my head. I felt the blood slowly trickle down my head and I looked at the ground. "I love you Carl." I mumbled hoping he would hear me before Negan raised the bat and hit me over the head again.    

     Carl cried as Negan repeatedly smashed her head. Once he finished he dropped down to Carl's level and gave fake sympathy. “Oh, I'm sorry, was she your girlfriend? You make sure to tell her brother she died just like her mother, I made sure of that.” Carl glared at him through tears as y/n's last words rang through his head. He could barely hear her speaking but he made it out. “I love you carl.” rang through his mind as Negan finished his torment and left the group sitting in tears. Carl stared at y/n's blood spot as Michonne crawled over and hugged him. “We're just kids, we're just kids.” He cried over and over again as he cried into Michonne’s chest.  

    Maggie and Glenn walked to the hilltop. When they walked through the doors Maggie collapsed and was rushed inside, but Glenn had to inform Jesus of his loss. “Paul.” Glenn said quietly. “We should go back to your trailer.” He said, leading Paul inside. “Your sister, she saved me.” Glenn explained, Jesus felt tears fall down his face as head dropped into his hands. “I'm sorry.” Glenn said tears threatening to fall from his own eyes as Carl's screaming and crying rang through his head. “WE’RE JUST KIDS.” 

[canonicallyobserving911]

Buddie & Henren: Sperm Donor Parallels

Buck’s season 6 sperm donor storyline includes several parallels to Hen and Karen’s storyline from season 3.

Since the conversation Buck and Hen had in 6x4 “Animal Instincts” was not the first time they’ve had a discussion about sperm donors; it appears their storylines are continuing to be paralleled with one another.  If Buck and Hen’s storylines are really being paralleled, then Henren’s sperm donor storyline from season 3 should also parallel with Buck’s/Buddie’s sperm donor storyline in season 6.  Some things have already been paralleled and it appears others will be paralleled in future episodes, i.e., (1) biological fathers, (2) chromosomal abnormalities/defective parts, (3) depression/breakdown and (4) biology doesn’t dictate parenthood.

Biological Fathers

2x5 “Awful People”

Hen, Karen and Michael had a conversation while they were at the park with Denny and Harry about the importance of being a biological father vs. being a stepfather.  Michael told Hen and Karen that Bobby was a good man and that he had a natural “paternal quality” but Karen reminded him that he is May’s and Harry’s biological father and anything that Bobby does for them would be extra. 

Right after they had that conversation, Eva showed up at the park with Nathaniel who she claimed was Denny’s biological father but Hen reminded her that she previously said she didn’t know who the father was.  Eva responded, “I lied!” and then she proceeded to tell them that Nathaniel has rights even though she gave up hers after Denny was born so that Hen and Karen could adopt him.  Nathaniel completed a paternity test and it proved he is in fact Denny’s dad.  Karen received a call from their lawyer about the paternity test and Nathaniel’s rights, she was upset when she explained it to Hen because she questioned her about why she brought Eva back into their lives in the first place.

The conversation Hen and Karen had with Michael along with the one they had with Eva was important because they were both conversations about men being children’s biological fathers along with the rights that are associated with it.  At the beginning of season 3, Hen and Karen started the IVF process so that Karen could have a biological child of her own.  Therefore if their sperm donor storyline is being paralleled to Buck’s in season 6 then Buck is going to struggle with the biological part of being a sperm donor because he won’t be able to walk away especially since he wants to have a family of his own. With Buck’s emotional attachment to people along with his abandonment issues, there’s no way he can walk away without wanting to be involved in the child’s life.

Sperm Donor/Baby Daddy

3x1 “Kids Today” 

Before Buck arrived at his party, Michael, Athena, Karen and Hen briefly discussed Karen’s IVF treatments because she explained the reason why she was being emotional.  After Buck arrived and greeted everyone, he made his rounds to thank them for coming and when he spoke with Hen and Karen, he asked them about their search for a “future baby daddy”.  Hen showed him a picture of the sperm donor they chose but Buck said the guy looked young and that’s when Hen explained the photo was more than twenty years old because they had to protect the donor’s privacy.  Karen spoke up and said, “He’s not a baby daddy. He’s a sperm donor”.  The look on Buck’s face when she said that clearly illustrated that he didn’t understand the difference between a baby daddy and a sperm donor then which could be why he doesn’t understand the difference between the two now.

Buck told them the guy was a cute sperm donor and that he would help them have a really cute kid.  Karen became emotional and hugged him and Hen mouthed “I’m sorry” to Buck as an apology.

Chromosomal Abnormalities/Defective Parts

3x5 “Rage”

When Hen made it home, she went into their bedroom and she noticed that Karen was upset.  So she asked her what happened and Karen started to explain to her that the doctor called and told her that “None of the embryos were good” and Hen said, “What? We had six?” Karen continued with “She said, they had chromosomal abnormalities or defects. They have to be discarded”.  Hen suggested they try again but Karen said she should have frozen her eggs years ago but she blamed herself because she thought she had time.  Hen told her it wasn’t her fault but Karen insisted that her body was telling her to give up.

4x5 “Buck Begins”

After Buck learned about Daniel, he told the 118 the reason why he was born and it was due to him being a savior baby so that his parents could use him for his parts or his “defective parts” to save his brother.  Eddie told him that wasn’t on him but Buck responded, “I doubt they would agree”.  Bobby asked him if he talked with his parents about it and Buck responded with “What am I going to say? Hey, I’m really sorry about your dead son but can we just talk about me for a minute?”  Hen spoke up and told him that his parents had two sons and that he mattered too but Buck said, “Sure, just uh, not to them”.

If the parallels continue then Buck’s sperm donation should be called into question by the clinic.  The clinic should provide him with a form to fill out and it should include a section that requires him to complete his family’s medical history; therefore he will have to list that “Leukemia” is a part of that history.  Or if he omits that information on the form then the blood tests should reveal it which means he should be rejected either way.  Being a savior baby means Buck was conceived to “provide a stem cell transplant to a sibling that is affected by a fatal disease” (Wikipedia.com); therefore the embryo selected for Buck’s conception was “engineered” specifically so that he could save Daniel which means the doctors were looking for specific DNA/chromosomal aspects before the embryo was ever implanted.  He should have disclosed that information to Connor and Kameron when they asked him so that they could have made an informed decision.  Also since Buck knows about his family’s medical history, he should have never agreed to be a donor.  If the lab does their due diligence, the form Buck should be required to complete or the blood tests he will be required to have should catch any/all abnormalities.  Either way when he’s rejected due to his “defective parts”, he will be headed towards having a breakdown or being depressed.  

3x6 “Monsters”

When Buck returned to work after the lawsuit, Hen was the only one to welcome him back with a red velvet cupcake.  While they talked in the locker room, Buck asked her how their “baby making was going” and she explained how there were a lot of twists and turns included in the process but she didn’t elaborate on the issues she and Karen had with the “chromosomal abnormalities” and defects.

After Karen found out about the “chromosomal abnormalities”, she became depressed and both Hen and Denny struggled from 3x6 “Monsters” to 3x8 “Malfunction” because Karen couldn’t get out of bed.  Hen talked to Athena about it in 3x8 but she explained how she couldn’t say those things to Karen.  

It’s been four weeks since episode 6x4 aired which could mean that Buck has already made the donation; therefore the 118 won’t be able to talk him out of it when he finally tells them what happened.  Also if the clinic contacts him about his medical history and Connor and Kameron decline his donation because of it, it’s very likely that Buck won’t tell anyone about it because the rejection should be the catalyst that propels him towards a breakdown.  If Buck’s storyline continues to parallel with Karen’s then that means Buck should also become depressed after he learns the reason why he was rejected.  His depression could mimic Karen’s to the point where he might not be able to get out of bed either.  Therefore Eddie will be there for him just like he was in 3x1 “Kids Today” when Buck was depressed after his embolism and he wasn’t being allowed to return to work.  Reminider, Eddie took Christopher to Buck’s loft to cheer him up when he was depressed the first time, so hopefully Eddie will tell Buck that Christopher is his son too as a way to remind him that he’s already a father.

6x4 “Animal Instincts”

When Buck went to Hen and Karen’s house to talk to Hen about being a sperm donor, the only thing they really discussed was if Buck would be able to walk away even though there would be a child out there with his DNA.  It seems like the show had them to purposefully avoid talking about all the other things they should have discussed.

She explained how his donation would NOT be anonymous but it appears Buck didn’t fully understand what that meant since he knows Connor.  He might believe that since he and Connor are friends that he should be able to see the child whenever he wants to but that’s not how it works.  That’s the main reason why Buck should have talked to more people about sperm donations so that he could get the full understanding of the process especially the part about him not having any rights to the child.  What exactly was Buck thinking since Connor hadn’t contacted him in more than 3 years?  If he only contacted him after 3 years just to get Buck’s sperm, it’s unclear why Buck thinks Connor would allow him to visit with their (Connor’s and Kameron’s not Buck’s) child after the baby is born.

He wasn’t taking it as seriously as he should have been because when she asked him if he was capable, he said, “I think we both know I’m capable” which he assumed meant being physically able to make the sperm donation but that’s now what she was asking him.

When Hen said, “Are you capable of being a father and walking away?” that was a callback to 2x5 when Hen, Karen and Michael discussed the importance and rights associated with being a biological father.  Since Buck responded, “Donor, not dad!” while they were talking, it could mean he somewhat understood the things Hen tried to explain to him but it’s obvious he was still a little bit confused since he agreed to do it anyway before thinking about how it would emotionally affect him.  Based solely on the comment he made to Hen and Karen in 3x1 “Kids Today”, it seems like he doesn’t understand the difference between a sperm donor and a baby daddy because he thinks being the biological father of the child would give him rights but he’s wrong.  Baby daddies have rights, sperm donors DON’T.  That’s why he should have talked to Bobby, Chimney or Eddie since all three of them are fathers and they could have given him insight that he wasn’t able to get from Hen.

Hen didn’t tell Buck everything that she and Karen experienced including the “chromosomal abnormalities/defects” the doctor told Karen about with regards to their six embryos. She also didn’t remind him of his own family history with regards to his brother Daniel and Buck being born as a savior baby to save him. It would have been beneficial for her to mention at least the part about him and Daniel so that he would have known it’s not as simple as him being “physically capable” and also because she had been in medical school prior to them having that conversation so those are topics both of them should have discussed. The conversation Buck and Hen had was important but there were a lot of things Hen could have said to help Buck fully understand why it wasn’t a good idea for him to be a sperm donor but she didn’t.  Therefore it begs the question as to WHY she didn’t mention those things to him.  She probably didn’t mention them because if Buck’s sperm donor storyline is continuing to parallel Karen’s, the “chromosomal abnormalities/defects” that led to her depression, could be the part of her storyline that parallels with Buck’s which should lead him to being depressed as well.

Biology doesn’t dictate parenthood

Being a good parent doesn’t always involve biology and that fact has been illustrated and proven many times on 9-1-1.  Bobby is not Buck’s biological father but he is his found dad and they look alike.  Bobby is also not May’s and Harry’s biological father but he’s their stepfather and he co-parents them as their second dad along with Michael.  May told him in 5x16 “May Day” that she has two dads and he was one of them.  

The same is true for Karen and Hen because Karen may not be Denny’s biological mother but Denny looks like her and if someone didn’t know them, it would be easy for them to assume that she is his biological mother.  Guess what other parent/son dynamic fits this description?  Buck’s and Christohper’s. 

Buck is not Christopher’s biological father, that’s Eddie.  But Buck and Christopher look alike with the same hair color and type along with them having the same eye color.  The elf in 2x10 “Merry X-Mas” told Buck after Eddie and Christopher walked away that the two of them have a beautiful son which means she could see the way Christopher resembles both of them.  Buck has been co-parenting Christopher with Eddie for more than four years now so if this sperm donor storyline is being used to help Buck realize that he’s already a dad, then...🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️.  Were there other storylines the show could have used as a catalyst to get Buck to the point where he would have a mental breakdown? ABSOLUTELY!  But for whatever reason, this is the hill 9-1-1 chose to stand on for his character so the audience will have to wait and see how it all plays out.  

Will Buck tell Connor and Kameron that he can’t be their sperm donor in 6x7 “Cursed”?  Has he already made the donation?  Will he talk to Eddie about it?  Could his DNA/defective parts be the reason why he gets rejected?  Only the showrunners, writers and producers know the answers to those questions.

[nymphbnny]

perfect strangers

MINORS DNI // 18+

part one; part two; part three

genre: nsfw

pairings: jean kirschtein x female reader

word count: 2.6k

tags/warnings: penetrative sex, dom jean, fingering, praising kink, slight body worship, dirty talk, sneaky.

synopsis: your recent discovery makes you certain that you won't be able to control yourself around him and neither will he, hence you decide that it was time to make an agreement that was rather spicy.

a.n: hey babies! so i finally decided to turn this into a short series since some of you were intrigued with the idea of having a continuation for the previous part i wrote. i hope you like it, enjoy <3

“How was I supposed to know?!” I yelled as soon as Jean exited our apartment. I had put on a random t-shirt to follow Connie to his room, trying to convince him that I had no idea that I fucked his best friend.

“Y/n he literally told you his name is Jean and he was attending my party. You’re acting as you’ve never seen him before!” he scolded taking off his shirt and throwing it across his room.

“Oh for fuck’s sake Connie. The last time I saw Jean I was 16 and he didn’t look like that. He’s so fucking different now how was I supposed to know. And to be fair, he was studying abroad for I don’t know how many years, how was I supposed to know that he metamorphosed like that.” I motioned my arm out, my other hand resting on my hip.

He groaned, rubbing his temples before he looked back at me. “Look,” he spoke softly. “I don’t want to fight with you over this okay? You’re right, I should’ve told you that he was coming back. He graduated a year ago and was considering coming back to his hometown, here. Let’s just forget it all happened okay? It’s a simple misunderstanding.” I nodded, resting my head on his chest as he embraced me into a tight hug.

“Now go take a shower you reek of sex.” he snickered earning a punch on his arm. He winced rubbing his flesh, a proud smile setting on my face.

***

The week went by smoothly. I told Sasha and Hitch what happened and they both had different reactions. Hitch was gushing over the sex and Sasha on the other hand confessed that she forgot to mention that Jean was coming back to stay here. It’s okay though. We all passed it and I was working my ass off to finally graduate.

Connie was spending his days with Jean, which granted me a lot of peace and tranquility. At least, that’s what I thought.

I hadn’t spoken to Jean ever since we hooked up, figured that Connie already explained the whole situation and moved on.

Three knocks on my door broke my focus, a loud frustrated sigh leaving my lips. “What Connie!”

“Actually,” a voice on the other side of the door caught me off guard. “It’s Kirschtein. Can I come in?” A knot formed in my throat.

“Sure.” he turned the knob, slowly coming in. “Connie knows I’m here by the way.” I nodded, adjusting my seat.

“What’s up?” the tension was awkward. The tension shouldn’t even be present in the first place. But how could I not get aroused when he was wearing a black tank top showing off the tattoos on his sleeves with a pair of sweats. He looked effortlessly attractive.

“- and like I said it will never happen again. Y/n?”

“Huh? Oh yeah, yeah. Never happen again. I’m very sorry but I need to finish this assignment.” He chuckled and nodded leaving me alone with my thoughts. Did I just make him talk to himself because I was too busy checking him out?

I shook my head, assuming that whatever he said wasn’t worth my time. Time went by rather quickly and the assignment was done earlier than I expected. It was already ten pm, and I had promised the girls I was going to meet up with them for some drinks.

I picked my outfit and applied some makeup. Simple and effective. We were going to spend the night at Sasha’s so I didn’t make much effort to look hot.

The place was empty when I left and I assumed that Connie was helping Jean to rent an apartment for himself.

Sasha’s place wasn’t very far from mine. As a matter of fact, it only took me ten minutes to get there. Once I got there, the girls were already ordering pizza and picking out some movies to watch.

“Hey whores.” I greeted them, earning cheers from Hitch and Sasha. “Oh my god, Mikasa I missed you!” I rushed to the dark-haired girl who was sitting on the couch and engulfed her into a tight hug. I haven’t seen Mikasa since I moved with Connie. We used to live together, but after she and Eren got together, he wouldn’t leave her alone. So I figured it would be best if I left and lived with my brother.

“I missed you too! I looked for you everywhere at that party where were you?” she asked taking a sip of her soda. Hitch began coughing dramatically as Sasha giggled next to her. “Oh quit it.” I teased rolling my eyes.

I ended up telling her everything, her face displaying a plethora of expressions. “I mean, Jean did change I can’t argue with that. But didn’t he recognize you?”

I shrugged. “I changed too. Puberty hit me like a truck.”

“Cheers to that.” Hitch raised her cup. We laughed and talked for hours. I missed going out with them like that. Fortunately, college will be over soon and I’ll have some time for myself.

Movies were playing in the background but we paid them no mind. We ate our food and cleaned the living room, not wanting to bother Sasha with the cleaning since she was having Niccolo over tomorrow.

I glanced at the clock that was hanging above the door. I gathered my stuff and tucked them in my bag, drawing all of their eyes on me.

“Already? Come on stay longer!” Sasha whined. I smiled softly at her and shook my head.

“I can’t, I’ll see you guys soon.” I waved at them and walked out of the door.

***

“Connie! I’m ho- what are you still doing here?” I froze at the entrance, my keys still hanging from my index finger, my eyes fixated on him as he only stood in basketball shorts.

“What do you mean what am I still doing here. I moved in here remember?”

Silence. Nothing but intense and awkward silence. Moved in? Since when?

“I told you when I came into your room. Weren’t you listening to me?” I stared at him blankly, not able to explain how caught in thought I was when he came into my room. I was too busy checking him out to care about what he was trying to tell me.

“Why didn’t Connie tell me?” I closed the door and locked it slowly, my legs feeling weak, the idea of living with him and seeing him walking around like that making me weak. And extremely horny.

“He said he’d rather if I told you. You know, break the ice.” he shrugged and walked forward, his chest now a few inches apart from mine. “You changed a lot from what I remember.” he lowly said tucking my hair behind my ear.

“So did you,” I replied, staring at his lips. He licked his bottom lip and held my chin between his fingers, forcing me to maintain eye contact.

I was a sweating mess. I still couldn’t believe that this was Jean, the horse face. What kind of water did he drink, and how did he get so big? Look at those muscles-

A sudden feeling on my lips interrupted my chain of thoughts. I soon realized that he held my bottom lip between his brown ones. “Kiss me back y/n, I know you want to,” he whispered, his breath brushing up my face.

It didn’t take me long to pull him to me, crashing my lips on his. He was intoxicating in ways I couldn’t understand nor explain. I needed him close to me at the moment and I didn’t care why.

“Yo, Jean where did you my video game?!” Connie’s voice boomed from the hallway, forcing us apart. Realization slapped my face when I looked at him and saw his cocky smirk. I just kissed him, even though I promised myself I’d never do anything with him ever again.

“I’ll get it!” he yelled back, the same expression resting on his face, his back facing the hallway. “I’d apologize, but you pulled me back. Anyway, I’ll see around beautiful.” he winked and began walking towards Connie’s room, his back muscles flexing at his movements.

What am I doing with myself?

***

The atmosphere felt nice. I couldn’t sleep so instead I lied down on my bed and watched the stars from my window. I couldn’t stop thinking about what happened hours ago and how I had to sit with them and pretend as nothing happened.

Jean was certainly not the little boy he was years ago. He got more confident and a lot more handsome. He was fucking with me and I thought, why shouldn’t I fuck with him too?

After all, I know for sure he didn’t tell Connie anything. He’s too protective of me and if he knew, well let’s just say Jean would be moving out by tomorrow. He trusts him blindly and I honestly just think he doesn’t want me to hook up with him again because he’s just like him.

He likes to mess around. Not the type to stay in the morning after. But neither was I. I sighed and dragged my legs out of bed, my body following.

“Shit now I gotta pee,” I whined stomping slightly on the wooden floor. I ruffled my hair with my hand and slipped on my slippers. I was wearing Connie’s t-shirt, so it was long enough to hide my thighs.

I walked to the bathroom when suddenly a hand grabbed my arm and yanked me into the guest bedroom. My mouth was quick to be silenced by another hand as I was about to squeal.

My back collided with the wall, my hands pinned on each side of my head.

“Jean let me go.” I struggled to get out of his grasp but he kept grinning at me. “Sure.” He let go of his grasp.

I looked around to notice a towel on his bed. “I was going to take a shower but then I heard your footsteps, couldn’t let you get there before I did.” He walked away, throwing his towel over his shoulder.

“Is that all?” I cocked my eyebrow, crossing my arms. He looked me up and down before saying: “You tell me. Need anything else?”

I looked at him briefly, calculating my next move. “An agreement. Connie can’t know.”

“Fuck yeah.” he dropped his towel and stepped closer to me, holding my face with his hands as he crashed his lips on mine. I kissed him back instantly, my fingers finding their way through his hair.

His tongue slipped in, caressing mine. His hands went down my body to squeeze my ass, pulling me even closer to him. My hands traveled across his bare chest, going over his pecs and then gliding one hand down his abs, while the other sat on his shoulder.

We pulled apart, his arms going under my thighs to pull me up and sit me onto the mattress. He walked to the door, locking it before he looked back at me.

Jean crawled over my body, caging me between his arms. “Divine.” he smiled and sat up, his hands tugging at my top. I helped him take it off and threw it on his chair. I was nude underneath him. It wasn’t the first time, yet he still looked mesmerized.

He licked his lips, his fingers tracing my cunt before dipping into my entrance. I arched my back at the sudden intrusion, trying my best to remain quiet.

“I missed your little cunt.” he chuckled massaging my insides slowly. I gasped, my hand immediately covering my mouth.

He rubbed my bud with his thumb, his pace never changing. It was torturing and slow, but I knew we couldn’t make a lot of noise nor make lots of movements that could awake Connie. We had to go nice and easy.

My legs squirmed, the combination of playing my nipples and watching him touch like he does driving me to the edge. My eyes rolled to the back as he added a third finger, my walls clenching tightly around them as I felt myself orgasm around them. “Good girl.” he praised with a chuckle, removing his fingers from my opening.

“Suck your juices off come on.” he tapped my hand, motioning me to remove it and take his fingers in. I stuck my tongue out, his ling digits finding their way down my throat making me slightly gag. “I didn’t know you were such an obedient girl.” he cooed, as I sucked off my arousal.

Jean sat back up, removing his shorts along with his briefs, his erection slapping on my lower stomach. “As much as I’d love you to suck me,” he paused pumping his cock. “I have to say that I miss being inside you.” And with that, he slid all the way in, his mouth silencing my moans.

He stayed still for a while, his eyes staring into mine intensely, almost as if he was trying to tell me something. I nodded my head, his hips moving at my signal. His thrusts were slow and deep, going over every spot. I wrapped my arms around him, my forehead resting against his, as he breathed heavily.

“I want to fuck you dumb, but he’ll hear your moans.” he taunted rolling his hips, his tip almost hitting my cervix. “So good.” I whimpered, wrapping my legs around him, my heels digging into his lower back.

“Jean…” I was close and my legs were a shaking mess. “That’s right baby, say my name.” he breathed in my ear, slightly speeding up his thrusts. I bit onto his shoulder, my orgasm ripping through my body.

I tightened around him, his strokes getting sloppier. It came to my attention that he wasn’t wearing protection, and I wasn’t about to get adventurous like last time. “Jean… pull out…”

“Beg.” was his only reply to which I complied. “Please, anywhere, just not-“ He harshly pulled out, and instead of jerking himself on my stomach, he reached up to straddle my chest and stroked himself. “Open.”

I stuck my tongue out, his hand now replaced with mine as I jerked him off, ropes of cum shooting down my throat. “Such a good girl.” he chuckled, rubbing his hand over his face.

He got off me and pulled his hair back using both hands, his naked body walking around the bed to grab some tissues. He cleaned off my arousal and handed me some to clean the corners of my lips.

“If only you could see how messed up you look,” he smirked and threw me my t-shirt before grabbing his towel and sliding on his shorts.

I put on my top and got off his bed. I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror and internally yelled at myself. I looked like a mess. My hair was tangled and my skin was all sweaty. Guess I have to take a shower too.

I looked over at Jean to see him staring at me with an amused look on his face. “What?” I cocked my eyebrow. He shrugged and smiled at me. “Connie and I are going out to get some lunch tomorrow. What’d you say?” he requested.

“I mean yeah sure. But Jean he can-“

“Can’t know alright.” he rolled his eyes. We stared at each other for a minute before I decided to leave his room.

As I made my way past him, his hand flew to cup my swollen cunt. “This belongs to me.”

[northern-passage]

Hello! I tried for a full hour searching for some asks you already answered but alas i couldn't find them bc Tumblr's search function is a bitch

So if you don't mind i had a few questions?

About lycans: what do they look like? Do they return to their original form when killed? Is that what happened in keld ( bc he turned out to be someone the townspeople knew and how would they know so i was wondering if the lycan turned back into human once it was dead or if they were able to recognize him by other means?)

I heard you planned to make a codex with all the creatures info? Is that still something you're planning?

Again about keld... I'm sorry if any of this is spoilery or if I'm getting specific uhm what was the weather/time of day when the fight with the lycan started/ended? Is that up for headcanon? Were Lea and MC thrown out of town the same day?

.... I had more but while writing i forgot-

Anyway i hope you have a nice day and thanks <3

hi!!!!!

there is actually an entry for lycans in the codex in game, but i don't think i really explain what they look like...lol.

i talked very briefly about lycans (and other creatures) here and here. basically, lycanthropy in this world functions as a disease, similar to the hunter's vel rot.

just like vel rot, the side effects of the disease can be exacerbated in areas where the vel is weak, and lycanthropy also has the additional influence of the moon, too. just like a classic werewolf they will always transform on a full moon, and they can't control this. there are other instances where they may be triggered into transforming, like experiencing extreme emotion, being injured, or again being in a place where the vel is weak. and if they don't receive any kind of medication, it can make them go a bit mad over time.

this is what happened with the lycan in keld. he was keeping it a secret, and without reliable access to wolfsbane, he started turning aggressive and shifting every night. in their shifted state they have absolutely no control and will have no memory of what they did/what happened once they shift back.

with this case specifically, the hunter can't be sure if the townspeople actually knew he was a lycan, or if they really had no idea. the hunter mentions it very briefly, but it is possible that they knew about his affliction and tried to protect him when nearby farmers called for help due to the slaughtered livestock, and lied about it being an omen in an effort to keep them from investigating properly (which almost worked...)

as for how they look, they are both bipedal and quadrupedal, and are very large. depending on the situation, they may retain more human-like features as well - this is typical for if they're shifting any time not during the full moon. i really like jakub rozalski's art of werewolves, here are some of my favorites (tw for blood and gore in most of these) [1] [2] [3] [4] [5] 

and you're right, once they are killed with a hunter's knife, it essentially "cleanses" them, and they will revert back to their human form. again, it's possible the townspeople didn't know and learned this way, or they already knew and were just upset that they hadn't been able to protect him/keep it a secret.

like i said, lycanthropy is manageable, so it could be they were just angry and viewed the hunter and lea as using excessive force when it wasn't necessary. or they could have been upset that he was found out and exposed. or they simply could just have a lack of understanding in general, and saw the dead body, recognized him, and refused to accept that it was really him that did those things, and not something else - and turned their blame and anger on lea and the hunter.

i always imagine the fight in keld taking place at night, right along the edge of town near the woods, with some snow on the ground. they were thrown out the same night, very shortly after the fight... still bloody and looking very pathetic.

[sanzu-sanzu-sanzu]

songs about toxic people 7*

Sanzu Haruchiyo X Reader

Summary: In which you are Bonten’s No. 2 and Sanzu is No. 3. Almost ten years of being stuck working together means you’re both bound to pick up on each other’s idiosyncrasies, yeah?

—

*IMPORTANT NOTE: this is more like an interlude/bonus chapter actually centering more on misc bonten x reader Gen! interactions. it still ties in with the whole story, it’s just there’s less to zero sanzu in this one cus the focus will be more on the other bonten haha, so if you’re here exclusively for sanzu x reader, you may skip this if you like! 😬  

it’s just i got these headcanons that idk what to do with and also they are somewhat short 😭

—

chapter 1 / chapter 2 / chapter 3 / chapter 4 / chapter 5 / chapter 6

chapter 7: We may not be a perfect family but we love each other (until we don’t) - koko

.

.

Koko thinks of cats when he thinks of you; partly from the circumstances of your first meeting, partly ‘cause of the way you sort of simply glide in and out of rooms quietly with the stealth and fluidity of one.

(Although Sanzu had insisted he thought more of ghosts and wraiths, a comment which Koko only made light of even though he wasn’t wrong.)

She even kinda fights like a feline, he’d told Inupi one time all those years ago, as he thought of the way your lithe and minimal movements were always able to take bigger guys down along with the quiet ferocity to match.

Maybe she learns from all the cats back in the shrine, Inupi responded—a joke, essentially, in his own terms. Koko suppressed a smile: cat and dog, you and her, maybe that’s why you two get along so well went his own, sad attempt at humor, because you and your second-in-command were obviously very close and very unlike cats and dogs. The joke, however, sadly did not seem to land, and Inupi’s forehead only creased, his expression dumbfounded.

That’s not how it works.

Koko never forgets the day you were first introduced by Mikey. It’s at the back of Toman’s abandoned shrine, at the edge of the thick forest surrounding the area, that their new leader had said they’ll be meeting Black Dragon’s temporary captain. He never specified what anyone would be doing in the forest at this hour in the afternoon, and neither him nor Inupi had asked, but then there you were: in your bare feet and in your school uniform, attempting to move a big pot of plant from one spot of land to another, your expression almost annoyed. (At the pot, most likely, which did not seem to budge.)

Mikey called your attention still a few meters afar:

“Hey. Whatcha up to—”

in a tone that very clearly did not seem to intend to place whatever you were up to above this particular Toman business at the moment, so really, it would not have made any difference whether you answered or not. Which you didn’t, only glancing at your president once—not with the angry expression, at least—before continuing with your ordeal.

The pot nudged just a tiny bit.

Only when Mikey finally stopped right in front of you and you noticed Koko’s and Inupi’s figures behind him did you finally stand straight, looking at Mikey quizzically. “What’s up?” Quick nods to Inupi and him. “Hello.”

Mikey briefly introduced all of you and proceeded to explain that you were to be formally placed as the Black Dragon’s new captain today, to which your eyes slightly widened.

“Oh, I thought you said tomorrow.”

Mikey hesitated at first but then shrugged. “Hm, they came here already today so I thought might as well. Come on, it’ll be quick.”

You narrowed your eyes at him and then to his two quiet companions but then so agreed anyway, and as Mikey ushered you in front nobody else aside from Koko seemed to notice your lack of shoes. You’d only taken a few steps ahead when you tugged at the sleeve of Mikey’s coat, making him pause.

“I don’t have my Toman jacket,” which was obvious but was not what Koko was expecting for you to say, if he were to be honest.

Mikey looked at you blankly. “Well, where is it?”

“Well, something happened to it,” was your only vague response, but then you turned your head to where you just came from making all three boys follow suit. On a wooden bench slightly obscured by the plants were a family of cats consisting of a mother and her kittens, all sleeping peacefully in a cozy pile on top of your balled up Toman jacket.

“Oh. Okay.” Mikey only nodded like he completely understood. Without thinking about it twice, Sano Manjiro, Tokyo Manji gang’s No. 1—feared around the streets of Tokyo, bowed to no one and stepped over everyone—took off his billowing Toman coat and draped it over your shoulders. “Here, you can borrow mine,” he simply said. “I mean, you gotta look the part.”

Your mouth stretched into a grin.

Beside him, Inupi gave Koko a quick, wordless glance accompanied by that tiny, upward curve on the corner of his mouth that anyone else could’ve missed. Inupi rarely smiled at anything anymore those days—perhaps one of the reasons why this singular, initial meeting had stuck in his mind all these years. It’s one of those memories Koko always thought he could probably live without, occupying a quiet little corner in his mind which, frankly, a much more practical or life-changing memory could have occupied, if it were up to him. But then there you were with your cats and your air of schoolgirl abandon making Inupi smile, an information that he simply didn’t know what to do about.

“Alright, boss. But please, no speeches.”

This made Mikey laugh. “Can’t promise you that, I’m sorry.” It’s only after a few more steps that Mikey did finally notice your bare feet.

“Where the hell are your shoes?”

“Oh, they got wet,” you quietly said. “I was playing with the cats…” and three pairs of eyes stared at you like it wasn’t enough of an answer. “With a hose. Manjiro, I was watering the plants.”

And so you stood atop the shrine steps while addressing the men from Black Dragons, your feet bare and covered in scratches and the Toman president’s much bigger coat over your shoulders. Nobody questioned the absence of shoes—at least not out loud—not with your leader Manjiro right by your side, in his flip flops holding a half-eaten taiyaki in one hand.

The memory comes unannounced in snips and pieces some years later as another Bonten meeting ends. There’s various movements around the table by now, but then Koko catches your undivided staring as you sat across from him, your chin propped up against one hand. He ignores you for a short while as he fixes his things, until he finally decides to look up.

“Anything wrong?”

You suddenly purse your lips in a small smile amidst the gloomy and rigid air of mid-morning Monday meetings and for a moment, it’s as if Koko is thinking of another memory.

“I just realized you kinda look like my Mr. Kaku,” is all you say. The little remark makes not-your Kakucho look up from the document he’s reading without really turning his head, while Rindou who is seated beside you squints—in curiosity or amusement, Koko can’t tell. From his own right side, Takeomi is slowly angling his head as if meaning to take a better look at Koko behind his curtain of silver hair.

Mr. Kaku, of course, is your pet cat, the one with the smooth silver fur that you’d rescued from an abandoned site during an out-of-town business trip some months ago. You and your unimaginative pet naming sense landed on “Mr. Kaku,” in honor of your then-partner Kakucho who had volunteered to keep the cat inside his bag thru the doors of the hotel that didn’t allow pets. But he looks nothing like Kaku, Manjiro had quipped, earning a few grunts of approval from your ever-biased circle, but you couldn’t have been bothered so you stuck with the name.

Koko is quick to decipher that in your-speak, cat comparisons are more or less compliments and never a form of insult—not that in your mid-20s, you all haven’t already gotten above petty verbal affronts, after all. So he humors you, eyes now back to his things but with his attention still on the matter at hand. “What, is it the hair?”

“Yeah, it’s the hair,” Rindou says before you can answer, his head lolling lazily on one shoulder. “Can’t believe no one had noticed before.”

“And the eyes,” you simply nod. “They both got these nice, sharp eyes.”

Would you have named him Mr. Koko if you thought he resembled Kokonoi before? is the one lingering question that none of the men around you bother to ask.

It’s only a couple of weeks later, after another Bonten meeting, when Koko hands you a souvenir from his weekend business trip: a red cat collar with a customized pendant, a tiny enamel engraving of your Bonten tattoo. The pendant is black on one side and gold on the other, and the small gasp you let out makes every head in the room turn—the almost unfamiliar, genuine sound of delight thawing the usual morning’s stern atmosphere.

“There’s a shop right across the hotel where they make rush engravings like that.” Koko is saying casually like it’s no big deal, but he sees the expression on your face and he can’t help but grin. “Thought Mr. Kaku might like it.”

Your eyes perk up at the mention of ‘Mr. Kaku’ like Koko is the first person to ever acknowledge that Mr. Kaku doesn’t need to be named anything else apart from ‘Mr. Kaku.’ “Oh, it’s perfect, Koko. I’ll send you pictures once I make him wear it,” you say, your attention instantly back to your hands, choosing to ignore his ‘I think just one picture might be enough.’

From the other end of the room, Sanzu is making his way towards the door. “Congratulations,” he smirks as he passes by behind you, quirking one eyebrow up at Koko. “Now she won’t be shutting up about it all weekend,” because Sanzu will be spending the next three days with you over in another city to conduct business with another drug scion, of course.

Across the table, Kakucho only sighs before shaking his head. “I still wish you could’ve picked a better name for your cat,” he says—a valid complaint, Koko thinks bemusedly, now that your own Mr. Kaku looks more like a feline version of himself.

chapter 8 >

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this one goes out to my closest friends the ones who make me feel less alien

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[raewritez]

Enough | Sokka

based on this request: You want requests? I have an idea/request if you don't mind and are still accepting them, if not I’m sorry. Maybe “friends to lovers/teammates to lovers” where Reader joins the team from Ba Sing Se and while they’re preparing for the invasion, or beyond, Sokka and Reader fall in love, or start to fall in love? I hope that makes sense. Thanks! Your writing is all wonderful! <3

word count: 3.6k

The last thing you'd expected was for the Avatar to break into your house.

You'd been upstairs in your room when you'd heard a ruckus from down below, drawing you to your feet with nervousness and light footsteps. Who was it, burglars? You made your way down the stairs, body pressed against the wall. You heard muffled whispering.

"We can't just break into random houses, Sokka!"

"Well, what else are we supposed to do?! Do you have any better ideas?"

Silence.

"That's what I thought, Aang. Just trust the process."

You peered over the corner, catching sight of the intruders. A boy, a bit shorter than you, stood awkwardly in the corner of your living room. He was dressed in yellow and orange robes, his head decorated with a blue arrow. Huh. Beside him, pulling the curtain back cautiously to scan outside, was a boy seemingly about your age. He was tall, tan skin and dark hair, dressed in a sleeveless blue tunic. You didn't peg these guys as particular threats, so you stepped down.

"Uh, hello?"

They spun around with a yelp, assuming defensive positions. The taller boy held something in his hand - a boomerang? He narrowed his eyes at you.

"What are you doing here?" He demanded.

"Um, this is my house? Who are you?"

He lowered his arm, glancing around sheepishly. "Oh, uh, sorry. We needed to hide."

You raised an eyebrow. "Hide? Hide from who?"

The younger boy spoke up. "The Dai Li."

You furrowed your brows. "The Dai Li?" You questioned, confused. "Why would you need to hide from them? Did you, like, break the law?"

The older boy crossed his arms. "What? No!"

"Then why are you hiding?"

"Because they're after us!"

"Why would they be after you if you didn't break the law?"

"Because!" He was flailing his arms now, and you almost chuckled with amusement. "They - they're bad guys!"

You looked at him flatly. "That sounds like something a criminal would say."

He groaned. "Ugh, ok, ok. Once we know they're gone, we'll leave."

"Are you sure? I was gonna invite you for some tea and cookies," you teased. He glances back, as if seeing if you were serious, before turning back grumpily.

The younger boy scratches his head awkwardly. "Um, anyway, thanks for not kicking us out. I'm Aang."

You chuckle. "Yeah...no problem. I'm Y/n." You aren't quite sure why you're having a conversation with the guys who just broke into your house, but they seem nice enough. The older one's a little grouchy, but for some reason you feel safe.

Aang smiles brightly. "Nice to meet you. This is Sokka," he says, nudging his shoulder.

Sokka glances back at you. "Hey." You offer him a wave.

"So...why are you hiding in my house?"

Aang glances at Sokka, and it seems like a silent argument passes between them. Sokka shakes his head, Aang gives him an imploring look, and Sokka glares. Then he throws his hands up, mumbles a "Fine", and Aang turns back to you with a grin.

"Well, you see, I'm the Avatar," Your eyes grow wide. "And we're trying to get some important information to the Earth King. But the Dai Li don't want us to, so they're kinda chasing us."

"You're the Avatar?" You breathe. He nods cheerfully. "Wait - so, why are the Dai Li chasing you? Shouldn't they be helping?"

"Yeah, they should," Sokka says. "But they decided to, you know, not."

You're confused. The Dai Li are the highest level of protection for the people of Ba Sing Se. Why wouldn't they help the Avatar? You look around the room, spotting the closet near the door. An idea pops into your head.

"I can help." They both turn to you, looking skeptical. "I mean I can help you get out. Without being noticed."

They look at each other, hold their gaze, then turn to you and nod.

///

"I look ridiculous."

You stifle a laugh, taking in Sokka's appearance. "I think you look great. And it'll help you get by unnoticed, so that's what matters."

He's dressed in your father's trench coat, a heavy, brown beast of a thing that's so long it pools at his ankles. He's also sporting a dashing top-hat; the brim so wide it effectively shelters his face. He glares.

Aang comes bouncing in, dressed in a hooded cape that provides coverage for his tattoo. He stops short when he sees Sokka, doubling over in laughter. "Oh, you look great, Sokka."

Sokka groans, slumping over. "Let's just get out of here."

You lead them out the front door, scanning the road for any sign of threats. You step out, the boys following in tow, and walk as confidently as you can past the agents lining the street. Eventually, you successfully make it out of the middle ring. Sokka immediately sheds his disguise.

"Well, here you go," you say, looking around. Although only one ring above you, the Upper Ring is much nicer than you're used to. "Good luck with the Earth King."

Aang's eyes grow wide. "Wait! You should...you should come with us!"

You tilt your head. "Come with you where?"

"Back to our place! You could meet our friends!" He nudges Sokka, who appears disinterested. "Right, Sokka?"

Sokka's eyes snap to yours. "Oh, uh, sure. I guess."

You're about to politely decline, but Aang is staring at you so hopefully that you can't turn him down. You smile softly. "Sure, Aang."

"Awesome! Let's go."

You're led through the cobblestone pathways, eyes trailing after ornate carriages and towering buildings. Soon, you reach their house. The home of the Avatar. Sokka walks up and turns the knob, jumping back in surprise. In front of him stands a girl, not much younger than you, with her hands on her hips and her eyes bright with anger.

"Where have you been?!" She demands, dragging him inside by his collar. "We've been worried sick! I mean, you didn't even leave a note, didn't say anything-"

"We're sorry, Katara," Aang intervenes, hands raised in peaceful greeting. "We got caught up."

It's then that her eyes fall on you, gaze softening into uncertainty. She looks at Sokka expectantly.

"Oh!" He exclaims, stepping back and gesturing towards you. "This is Y/n. She helped us get away from the Dai Li."

The girl, Katara as she'd been called, offered you a slight smile of gratitude. "Thank you for helping my idiot brother."

You chuckled, grinning at the look of betrayal Sokka gave the girl. "It was no problem."

She nodded, extending her arm. "Do you want to come in?"

You glanced towards Aang, who was smiling excitedly. "Oh, yeah, sure."

You stepped inside, feeling a bit awkward. You didn't really understand why Aang wanted you to come so badly, but it was a kind gesture nonetheless. You scanned the interior; emerald walls adorned with gold plating that was probably more expensive than your whole apartment. You fidgeted your fingers, standing by while Katara and Sokka bickered about responsibility. A slam startled you out of your thoughts.

"Who's this?" A girl stepped out of the - hole? Yeah, hole, she'd just kicked a hole in the wall. Katara paused her lecture.

"Toph, this is Y/n. She helped Sokka and Aang with the Dai Li."

"Cool." She yawned, walking past you and plopping on the couch.

"We need to get to the Earth King," Sokka said, assuming a demeanor of focus and determination. "If the Dai Li aren't going to help us get to him, we'll have to do it ourselves." He briefly explained his plan, something about breaking into the fancy party that was happening later that night. They came up with roles, with guidelines for what each person should do, working together like a well-oiled machine. You felt out of place, you didn't know what your purpose was here. Aang turned to you, smiling softly.

"Y/n, you in?"

You stared. You couldn't comprehend the reason this boy had so much faith in you, the reason these kids were so willing to let you in on their scheme after just meeting you less than an hour ago. You didn't understand why you trusted them, either. You smiled.

"I'm in."

///

That was your first mistake.

When you'd agreed to break into an Earth Kingdom party with the Avatar, you didn't think you'd end up having to flee your home. You sat upon Appa's back, knees pulled to your chest as Ba Sing Se grew smaller. Sokka was steering, and the rest had their heads tucked into their hands. Except for Aang, who was lying unconscious next to Katara.

You'd remained in the city with Katara as the rest of the group separated, happy to spend some time with your newfound friend. It was then that things got messy; you found out the Fire Nation had infiltrated the government, the local tea-boy was actually a banished prince, and you found yourself in the crystal catacombs as a battle went on around you. You'd been there with Zuko and Katara, and you weren't sure exactly what'd gone down between them but it was obviously something serious, and you'd been there as he joined his sister - Azula. She was pretty scary.

You fought the best you could, your unpracticed earth-bending not doing much damage against the Dai Li agents, before Aang was struck by Azula's lightning. Now, you sat atop his sky-bison, mind racing and body numb from the shock of it all. You were in way over your head.

The five of you met up with Sokka and Katara's dad after dropping off the Earth King, because, you know, he was just casually there, too, boarding a Fire Nation ship as a means of disguise. Sokka introduced you to his father, Hakoda, who welcomed you with a warm smile and a firm handshake.

"It's a pleasure to meet you, Y/n. Sokka's told me a lot about you. You two must really get along well," he said when Sokka was out of ear reach, voice laced with mirth. You flushed when you registered what he was implying; the mischief gleaming in his eyes. You frantically tried to put a sentence together.

"Oh, we're not - he doesn't...I mean we do, but not like-" He cut you off with a chuckle and a friendly pat to your shoulder.

"I'm just teasing. Come on, let's join the others."

You sat with your friends and the Water Tribesmen aboard the steely deck, huddling with Toph and Sokka for warmth. Katara went downstairs to heal Aang, who had yet to wake. Your meals mainly consisted of rice as it was too risky to stop and buy more supplies. You were still dressed in your Earth Kingdom clothes; green-tinted pants and a tunic, feet clad in worn-down boots. Not ideal for posing as a Fire Nation soldier.

You were still in shock, you supposed, at how quickly things changed and how fiercely your life was ripped from you. I mean, just a few days ago you were a normal kid living in the middle ring of Ba Sing Se, where nothing remotely exciting ever happened. Then, the Avatar and his friend had broken into your house and now everything was different. You weren't upset, it was just a lot to process. You were worried for Aang and a bit overwhelmed at the reality that seemed to be your new friends' normal. So when everyone else returned to their rooms for sleep, you made your way to the overlook.

The moon beamed down over the sea - ivory light caressing the waves and kissing the surface. You breathed deeply, inhaling the cool night air that smelled of salt-water and a freedom you'd never experienced. You sat there, slightly chilly from the cold, when a warm presence took place by your side.

You glanced up, seeing Sokka's skin glowing under the starlight. Woah, had he always been this pretty? It was probably just the moon...that and your sleep deprivation. Yeah, that was it.

"What're you doing up?" He questioned, eyes cast out to the horizon. His hair was loose from its usual ponytail - wolf-tail, as he'd passionately pointed out to you days earlier - the dark locks flowing freely about his face. You tore your eyes away, following his stare.

"Just couldn't sleep," you glanced over. "You?"

He sighed, leaning against the metal. "Me neither. Just worried."

You turned to face him, face softening into concern. "About what?"

He ran a hand through his hair. "About Aang. About the Earth Kingdom...just...everything."

You moved closer, resting your forearms against the edge of the ship. He pressed his shoulder against yours.

"I get it. I am, too. Everything that's happening is just...crazy. There's no way I could've even imagined it."

Sokka tilted his head towards you, blue eyes glimmering with compassion and softness. "Yeah...how are you doing? I haven't really asked, I mean, this must be kinda shocking for you."

You snorted, nodding your head. "Well, yeah. But it's ok. I'm not the one who has it worst right now."

"Sure, but you can still talk about it. You can talk to me...if you want."

You smiled up at him, his face shadowed by the abyss of the night. "Thanks."

He offered you a grin before staring up at the sky. "You know, that's my first girlfriend," he said, pointing at the moon.

"The moon?" He nodded. "That's...rough."

///

It was finally here. The day of Black Sun.

You'd be lying if you said you felt totally prepared, but with some rigorous earth bending lessons from Toph and sparring with Sokka, you felt more confident in your abilities.

A finger poked your cheek. "Hey, are you listening?"

You glanced at Sokka's teasing grin, scratching the back of your neck sheepishly. "Uh...yes?"

"Really," he said, moving to stand in front of you. "What did I say?"

"Something about...food?"

He laughed, shaking his head. "It's ok, I'll tell you later." He looked behind him, taking in the sight of the preparing fighters and looming submarines. He took your hand in his. "Are you ready for this?"

You sigh, squeezing his fingers between your own. "Ready as I'll ever be."

He smiles down at you, and the look in his eyes is pure adoration. He reaches to tuck a stray piece of hair behind your ear. "You know, I'm glad I broke into your house."

You snort, swatting his hand away. "Yeah, yeah. Thanks a lot, nerd."

He chuckles. "Hey, I know you're glad, too. Otherwise, you never would've met me and would've been miserable and bored your whole life."

You laugh, but it's probably true. You and Sokka had grown much closer over the past weeks, days spent in playful conversation and evening strolls, in play-wrestling and heads rested on shoulders. You were the one he came to when his mind was troubled, when his energy was too spent to conjure any jokes. Yeah, you were glad, too.

You were called into the submarines - Sokka's invention, something you were unfathomably proud of - and off you went. Into the Fire Nation. Your arrival went mostly smoothly, disregarding the few punctures in the submarine walls, and you ran out of the carrier with the earth at your fingertips. Aang had flown off to fight the Fire Lord, and it was up to the rest of you to deal with everyone else. Your heart pumped loudly, blood rushing in your ears and adrenaline flowing in your veins. You raised your arms, summoning the ground upwards to knock out a few soldiers.

"Y/n!"

You turned around just in time to see Katara swoop down on Appa, Sokka and Hakoda climbing up with her. "Come on!" she yelled. "We're going to take out the soldier's battlements."

You nodded, running towards the bison and pulling yourself atop the saddle with help from Sokka. Appa lifts off, reaching between the battlements.

"Katara and I will take the one on the right," Hakoda said, his voice one of a true commander. "Sokka and Y/n, the left. Let's go."

You climb the battlement, hoisting yourself inside through the window before scanning the room. Pointed outwards is a sort of cannon, aimed perfectly towards the group of fire benders that were advancing towards your friends. You step forward, trying to figure out the mechanics while Sokka climbs in. "Oh-ho," he says, taking note of the projection of the cannon. "This thing is just begging to be fired."

You nodded, toying with the controls. Sokka stepped behind you. "Here, I'll show you."

He placed his palm over your hand, guiding it to where it needed to be. From his pocket he pulled a match - where did that come from, anyway? - and nudged it between your fingers. "Light it up, Sunshine."

You place the tip to the ignition, Sokka aiming the cannon. He pulls you back against him, arms wound tightly around your waist, and you cover your ears. The canon booms, sending out a flurry of smoke. You rush forward, fearful of the damage you might have just inflicted, breathing out when you see that it only landed between the soldiers and your friends. It didn't hit them, something you were a bit grateful for, but it allowed the fighters to evade the onslaught. Sokka chuckled in your ear.

"Not bad, not bad."

"You did all the work."

"That's not true! You were vital."

You shake your head, fighting off a grin. "Ok, we should probably get rid of this thing now."

"Agreed."

You climb back out the window, jumping onto the ground with a thud. Breathing deeply, you concentrated your mind on the earth that lay below the battlement, and with a flick of your wrist, it crumbled. From the cliffside it fell, effectively ridding you of one other thing to worry about.

Sokka let out a low whistle. "Impressive."

You turned to him, out of breath. He stepped closer, brows knitted in slight concern as he lifted your chin with his knuckles. "Hey, you ok?"

You nodded, swallowing and trying to rewatch your breath. "Yeah, still a little new to this."

His thumb stroked your cheek before he moved his arm, placing it over your shoulders. "Come on, just stay with me."

You did, gladly.

///

So...things didn't exactly go as planned.

It turned out that the Fire Lord knew all along about the invasion, and Aang never had the chance to fight him. You'd come face-to-face with Azula again, something that made your blood boil. You'd had to leave - leaving the adults behind while the kids climbed aboard Appa's saddle. You were all exhausted, slumped over and falling to your knees when you finally reached the Western Air Temple.

You tried to mull your sadness; that guilty feeling that it was you who should've been left behind instead. You knew everyone was hurting - some in ways you couldn't really fathom. Aang felt like he had failed - again - and he went to bed that night with a half-hearted side hug and tired eyes. Toph felt weak, something she hated more than anything in the world. And Sokka and Katara...they'd lost their dad again.

So when you saw Sokka on the mountainside, head held in hands, you felt that he was more important. You plopped down next to him, his eyes snapping up and softening when they laid on you. No words were spoken; they didn't need to be. Instead, he sighed, pressing his cheek against your shoulder. You ran your fingers through his hair, soothing him with your touch. You only halted when he laced your fingers with his own, pulling your hand to his lap and tracing patterns across your skin.

"It's not your fault, Sokka."

He nodded against you, but you heard his sniff. You straightened up, his head begrudgingly lifting from its place against you before you cupped his face with your palm. "It's not," you implored, desperate for him to stop feeling so down on himself. "None of us could've predicted that they knew. And with Azula...she knew what she was doing. None of this is because of you."

He glanced away, blue eyes brimming with the tears he'd fought so hard to keep at bay. He dipped his head in silent acceptance, nuzzling against the warmth of your palm. You smiled sadly.

"It's not over, Sokka. There's still hope, now more than ever. And I know we'll figure it out."

He raised his gaze, and it seemed like his soul was carried in his stare. Slowly, enough so that you thought you imagined it, his eyes drifted down to your lips. He leaned in slowly, bringing his calloused hand to brush back your hair. You were frozen, as if one wrong move would shatter you from this dream. His palm was warm against your cheek, and his nose bumped your own. Your eyes met his, close enough together that it was a bit funny to look at, and he offered you a silent question. You answered with your lips against his.

He breathed against you, fingers carding through your hair. His lips were warm and oh, so soft, and they moved against yours with ease. You wound your arms around his neck, bringing him closer. He was warm, and he was familiar, and he was safe. You pulled apart when your lungs ached for air, peeling your eyes open with effort. He was looking at you, and you were looking at him, and suddenly a grin broke out across his face. He laughed breathily, nudging his head into the crook of your neck. You laughed with him, holding him tight. You sat there together for who knows how long, melted in each other's embrace under the light of the moon. He pressed soft kisses against your neck and whispered thanks into your ears. You responded with a peck to his tanned cheeks. You were right, he knew. It wasn't over. There was time left, and there was hope. Wrapped in your arms, he was sure of that.

[wonlouvre]

pairing: doctor!wonwoo x lawyer!female oc genre: modern royalty, arranged marriage, fluff and future angst word count: 3.2k WARNINGS: ANGST, VIOLENCE, GUNS

a/n: we are nearing the end guys :( and i promise, it’s a HAPPY ENDING! but for now we have to face the angst, i’m so sorry. disclaimer!! as i have said from the previous parts, i am not well-versed with investigations and court procedures. PLEASE CORRECT ME IF I’M WRONG. thank you very much!! please enjoy this new part and hit my ask box with what you think of it <3

nine: grief | masterlist

Wonwoo has had difficult times in his life and he has managed to overcome them all. Growing up in the public eye, fulfilling duties decreed to him even before he became a teen, a break-up, excelling both academically and physically and most of all, loving himself for who he is. He knows his parents did everything in their power and love to make it a little easier for him. They are the reasons he kept going and going. 

But his heart can’t seem to carry this overwhelming heaviness. 

His parents wanted to end the engagement immediately. It was an argument, an angry one. His mother had her ears closed even before he could speak meanwhile his father’s closed lips already said it all. Of course, he was defensive. He understands his parents concern for their citizens, but nothing is final until a verdict is reached. He has to come back to Jung and Sam and he has to come back to you. Surely enough, when he stepped out of the doors of his home, he had chosen love over duty. 

It’s just that he didn’t know that you had different plans. 

“Where’s the pretty lady?” Sam asks out of the blue while he plays with the new toys Wonwoo brought for the kids at the welfare.

He has been visiting them frequently, at least four times a week in between his hospital schedule. Especially after you decided that he should distance himself from you, he has been in and out of here because the boys are one of the only reasons he’s here other than you. He’s hoping you only meant a break if that’s what you wanted. Because he’d give it to you with as much distance as you want just come back to him. Come back to him because he doesn’t and can’t let you go. 

“She’s a bit busy now,” he tries to make up an excuse and Sam raises his sparkling eyes at his face, probably searching for some truth in his lie. 

“You look different when she’s around,” the young boy says and goes back to his toys. 

Wonwoo’s ears perk and his brows knit in question. “What do you mean?”

“Jung thinks I don’t see it, but his face,” Sam explains and gestures to his tiny yet swelling cheeks. “It changes because of this girl here that I think he’s crushing.”

Wonwoo can’t help the growing smile on his face. “Jung has a crush?”

“Yes.” Sam bobs his head cutely. “You’re just like Jung with the pretty lady around.”

“How about now?” He asks the observant boy who purses his tiny lips before narrowing his eyes at him. 

“You look a little sad.”

Wonwoo didn’t need to ask who’s the pretty lady Sam was talking about because to him, you’re the only pretty lady in his life (second to his mother of course even though she’s angry at him at the moment). He tried to not make it obvious. He doesn’t want anyone to see him that the controversy and your father’s arrest is breaking the two of you apart. He can’t let them see him falling apart for that matter because he wants you to see him confident and strong. 

He doesn’t want to further fuel your doubts and fears. If he can’t support you closely, he’ll do his best to support you even from afar.

That’s why life for him continued. He goes to work, attends to his patients and co-workers needs, he eats, he exercises and he even entertains drinking with Soonyoung despite having to take care of him because of how fast he gets drunk. 

It’s an ineffective distraction because he misses you terribly. He misses going to your office just to take you away from your computer, he misses driving around town with you in the passenger seat and listening to your stories, he misses sleeping over at your apartment after a tiring day shift, he misses your warm and welcoming embrace, he misses your shy and soft kisses against his lips, cheeks, nose, forehead, neck and everywhere else.  

Did he tell you he misses you?

He sends you messages every day. He doesn’t call and he doesn’t wait for a reply. He just wants you to know that he’s here whenever you’re ready. Jeongyeon is kind enough to keep him in the loop, but the updates are very minimal because she’s still your subject and she doesn’t want to hurt you any further. 

For a moment, Wonwoo was afraid to take the leap. But when you asked him if he still wants to marry you which could be equivalent to you ending things, he had to. If you stay or not, he had to say it with all his heart. You had to know because he was sure that whatever it is his whole being is feeling, it’s only for you. 

“I love you.”

Your heart drops at his confession, making you sob to the palm of your hands. He can’t do this to you right now. It’s already hard and painful. You want to be selfish, but it would be wrong to let him suffer with you when he has been nothing but kind and honest. 

“You’re not your father, Y/N,” he promises and holds your hands down. “Please look at me.”

You shake your head, sniffling. You want to scream you love him too. But the words are nothing but a lump at the back of your throat. You continue shedding your tears and the sight breaks Wonwoo’s heart. 

“It’s okay.” He lifts your head up by your cheeks. He wipes your tears away even though it’s futile. He wishes to share with your anguish, but he also respects the desires of your heart. 

His smile was small when he leans down and briefly presses a kiss to your trembling lips. You accept it, fearing it might be the last. You also listen to his last words before he leaves with his bag and coat because it also might be the last time you’ll ever hear them.

“I love you.”

The rain patters on the roof of the car when Wonwoo’s words echoed inside your head. Just the thought of what had transpired the last few days brings tears to your eyes. You haven’t seen him since that night and the longing is unbearable. You wish to hear his voice, feel his touch against you or just see him. But you can’t and you have to persevere through it because you owe justice and accountability to your people.   

You haven’t spoken to your mother even if you tried. She’s just tired, so tired you can’t bring a word out of her. You try to be understanding and a little more patient. After all, getting over a betrayal doesn’t happen overnight. That’s why you continued working even though almost every client you have has backed down and declined your services. Nonetheless, you still go to your office every day as if everything is okay. You drink your coffee, you run over your files and even do a little organizing and disposing here and there. 

Your father’s first trial is today and you’re on your way to speak to him at his detention center. This is the first time you’ll see him aside from the television and newspapers. You’ve been crying ever since he got taken away. You can’t help it. You already know the truth and there’s no blinding away from it. But you want to hear from your father, whom you thought you have known all your life. You want his truth and maybe find some closure. 

When you arrive at the parking lot, the rain has ceased and little by little the temperature is rising again. You really wish things were different. Something in you wishes that this is a set-up. You wish that your father was innocent and only being framed. But there is a bigger something that’s telling you to throw away those wishful thoughts because it’s wrong. 

You ask yourself, am I angry at my father? while walking to the entrance leading to the visitor’s area. I should be, right? You argue because your family name and career is tarnished. Your upcoming marriage is no different which is most likely to be over. 

“Hi my darling,” The King, stripped from his expensive suit, greets you with his usual smile.

The glass between you and your father is clear enough to see that he doesn’t look good. Your father used to look every day ready with his suit on and slick back hair. But right now, he doesn’t. Tears well up in your eyes but you hold it in. It will take a long time to get used to seeing him like this. It will take a painfully long one.

Maybe you’re not angry. Maybe you’re just hurting.

“Hi dad,” you greet back. “How are you?”

The old man smiles and warms his thighs with his hands while looking around the small room. “I’m okay.”

You nod and the cold silence engulfs the room. 

“I’m sorry darling,” he finally says and hearing those words made you burst into tears. He sees you crying and this is the first time he can’t reach his hand out to wipe the tears away. “I’m really sorry that your father’s greed has left you and your mother a wound that might never heal.”

Greed. The news, the Royal Police, the prosecution and everyone else were talking about this. They’re still talking about this. It’s scandalous, it’s controversial. It’s unbelievable too. How could the head and protector of the kingdom do this? 

How could your father do this?

“Dad,” you sob. “Dad.”

“I know,” he tells you. “I know.”

“Please tell me they’re lying,” you begged, your voice shaking.

“I cannot betray you any further, my darling,” he sadly says. “I have to set you all free from my lies.”

You harshly rub your fingers against your eyes, trying to dry the tears that won’t stop from falling. “Who’s Kim Mingyu?”

The alarming buzz! blasts, indicating that your time’s up. You’re quick to your feet and hold your sweating palm against the glass. Your father mirrors your action but it didn’t last long because he was being handcuffed again. 

“Remember,” he says, struggling a little against the two uniformed men. “You are your own person, my darling.” 

Maybe you’re not hurting. Maybe you’re grieving because you just lost your father. 

You know who Kim Mingyu is. You already knew before you could even ask your father. You just wanted to know how your father met him and entangled himself with such a man. What led him to fall for his lies and money that he could trade every ounce of dignity and integrity in his being? Something of that sort. 

Kim Mingyu’s mining business was proposed to the Secretary of the Trade and Industry Department. A mining business that will have children go underground for long agonizing hours. At first, they were immediately rejected knowing that there’s an obvious and strict law disallowing foreigners to the kingdom’s mineral resources. Much more the exploitation of young children. But, Mingyu was ambitious and a sniper to every man's weakness. It didn’t take long for the Secretary of the Trade and Industry to bite. It was easily followed by the Secretary of the Justice Department and your father. They all, among many others, eventually fell for his trap. Everything worked out for Kim Mingyu. 

Your hip is against the hood of the car as you watched the prison guards surround the vehicle your father will ride to the court. Everyone is on high alert. Well, they should be. No one else is more high profile than a criminal king. It’s only the first trial but you’re already more than aware of how things will turn out in the end. 

You clutch the lifebuoy pendant of the necklace you’re wearing, nervous and trying to keep everything together.

You could leave now, but the time and opportunity to see your father is running out. This prison is the only place you could linger just to see him, even for a short while. You won’t be able to follow him at court because Seungkwan advised you not to. Which you understand. This whole case involving your father is already causing a media frenzy so staying away is the smart thing to do. 

As you wait, your phone suddenly rings with an unknown number flashed on the screen. You blink, wondering who could it be at this hour. After a beat of hesitation, you answered and held the phone against your ear. 

“Hello?”

“Ah, Princess Y/N. How’s the King doing?”

You’re not that forgetful to not recognize this voice. “Mr. Kim, how did you get my number?”

“That’s not important right now,” he dodges the question. “What’s important is what I am about to tell you.”

“What do you want from me?” You say with gritted teeth and from your peripheral you can see the guards scramble. Your father is about to come out.

You can hear him scoff. “I don’t want anything from you, Your Highness. But listen…”

Your heart starts to beat faster. It’s a hard visual but your father is nearing the exit. Your bottom lip is starting to hurt from how hard you’re biting it and the few seconds of pause and suspense that Mingyu’s giving you is not helping at all. 

“Listen you sick---” He cuts you off and your blood runs cold.

“I’m going to kill your father.”

What is the fondest memory that you have of your father? 

They’re too many to count and every memory with him, small and big, will always mean everything to you. But as an example, it would be the day you finally took oath as a lawyer. He didn’t tell you, but he, together with your mother, was secretly present at the venue. He told you beforehand that they shouldn’t go because he didn’t want the people to make you uncomfortable and steal the spotlight. You ignored his lame excuse of fame and told him that he can do whatever he wants. 

But he was really there. Tears brimming on his eyes together with pride beaming on his heart. Your mother had to calm him down because he got a little out of control, almost screaming with all his chest at the venue that you’re his daughter. 

You only found out when you hopped on the car and they’re inside with a small cake, flowers and party hats on, shouting loud congratulations and surprise simultaneously. 

Your father was always there. Your parents were. 

You remember those when you ran and pushed your way against the guards blocking your father’s view. You were frantic as you screamed at them to get your father back inside. You fought with all your strength and thrashed against their hold just to reach your father. When you slipped away from them, you ran again, fast. 

You did your best to not get caught. You just have to be close to your dad and push him back inside. You just have to be close to him. You just have to protect him.

You have to be there for him. 

“Please stop!” You shout when another guard takes hold of your waist, locking you to the ground. “You have to bring my father back inside!”

“You’re Highness, please calm down!” The guard shouts back and you fight against him. When he didn’t let you go, you stomped the heel of your shoe on his feet, making him fall in pain. 

“Dad!” You call when you’re finally nearing him. His head lifts up at the sound of your voice and searches for you among the sea of men. “Please! You have to take him back inside! I received a call from Kim Ming---”

BANG!

BANG! 

It was searingly fast. Your whole body collapses on the sweltering concrete before you could reach your father and when his eyes finally find you, you are already swimming in the pool of your blood.  

“It’s always good to see you Mrs. Wang,” Wonwoo compliments the old lady who’s starting to frequent the emergency room. “But not in this manner.”

The old lady gives him a cheeky grin and pinches one of his cheeks. If Wonwoo doesn’t know any better, she’s doing this to not get scolded any further. 

“Your blood sugar is high and I don’t think your granddaughter appreciates her grandma endangering her own life,” he lightly scolds her, if that’s how he can put it. He’s still a doctor after all. “She loves you and she wants you to be healthy when she walks down the aisle in the future.”

Mrs. Wang gives him a silent nod at the mention of her granddaughter, promising that she won’t disobey anymore. That relieves Wonwoo, his lips lifting in a smile. He signs her clearance and hands it back to the nurse. After a few more instructions, he takes his leave and walks back to the information desk. 

He takes one of the patients charts to read. The phone rings and the nurse in charge immediately picks it up and answers. At first, Wonwoo didn’t bother looking up from the paper because emergency calls happen every three seconds. But when there was an eerie silence amidst the loud and busy room, his curiosity made his head tilt up only to get surprised at the widened eyes the nurse was giving him. 

He was about to ask what’s wrong but when he heard the sound of the siren nearing, he ignores his suspicions and runs to the entrance. 

The ambulance parks at a safe distance and the paramedics get out. They move quickly to get the patient out and when they see him, their mouth falls open but no words come out.

Wonwoo didn’t notice so he proceeded to ask, “How’s the patient?”

“Wonwoo!”

Soonyoung almost tripped on his feet as he tried to get a hold of his friend. He takes his arms and tries to pull him away from the ambulance he’s about to open. Wonwoo is starting to get irritated at the bizarre and disconcerting feeling that’s starting to settle in the emergency room.

Wonwoo knocks him off with a glare. “What the hell are you doing?”

“Wonwoo, please,” Soonyoung begs with an unsteady voice, clinging to his friend. 

“Female, late twenties, two gunshot wounds,” one of the paramedics finally yet carefully reports while the other opens the doors of the ambulance. “It’s Her Highness, Princess Y/N.”

Wonwoo roughly removes his friends hand from his arm to step closer to the ambulance and when he sees your lifeless body, he didn’t waste any more time and helped the paramedics move the stretcher out. Soonyoung can see his friend’s hands shaking as he takes hold of the bloodied gurney. He knows he has to stop him right now. 

“Baby,” Wonwoo calls as he runs and wheels you inside. You can’t hear him, but he has to try. He observes proper protocol of transferring you to the bed of the emergency room before applying more pressure to your wounds. You have lost a lot of blood already and it’s not helping Wonwoo that he can’t see your eyes.

“Please, please, please,” Wonwoo whispers as he removes all the obstructions on your body and when his eyes catch the necklace he gave around your neck, his legs grow weak and removing it from you made his tears fall.

“Baby, please,” he pleads. “Open your eyes, hmm?”

Soonyoung steps in together with the doctor who will perform the surgery and take everything from here. He slowly pulls his friend away from your body. Wonwoo didn’t protest anymore, there’s nothing in him left to do so. Your blood is in his hands, in his white coat, it’s everywhere. 

This is not the distance Wonwoo wanted. 

He can’t be apart from you forever.

[ahtsumu]

the mystery of love ; kuroo tetsurou

pairing: kuroo tetsurou x f!reader

synopsis: kuroo tetsurou does not believe in soulmates. he believes in science, himself, and sometimes other people. but that doesn’t mean he can’t believe in love.

tag(s): sweet summer lovin’, friends to lovers, inspired by call my by your name, university student!kuroo tetsurou, lab intern!kuroo tetsurou, so much pining lol, fluff, angst, slow burn ; warning(s): profanity, mentions of alcohol ingestion (it’s legal bc they’re in italy!), suggestive themes ; wc: 4.8k

a/n: happy birthday tetsu!! i hope you guys like this. i really enjoyed writing it ♡

Kuroo Tetsurou does not believe in soulmates. He believes in science, himself, and sometimes other people. At least, that’s what he tells you. Sometimes you treat this information as a source of hope; other times, you’re not sure what to make of it.

This, you realise with his shoulder pressed against yours and both your bodies sprawled across his wrinkled bed sheets, is one of those other times. You turn your face to look at his.

“What?” he asks, one side of his mouth curling up in a smile.

For a moment, you wonder what would happen if you just said it. You could blame the alcohol. Get away with it scot-free. While you mull the option over in the dead silence of his room, your brain suddenly registers the music still playing from the living room. The low bass reverberating through the walls. How close your lips are. The sound of his breaths.

“Earth to Y/N?”

And like that, the little what-if that rose in your mind falls back with its tail between its legs. You bite your lip, look around his room like the walls have a script printed on them. Unfortunately, they do not.

“I was just thinking about my shirt.” It’s not great, but it’s the best you can do while still feeling the vodka and orange juice burn in your stomach. And smelling it on yourself.

Kuroo’s laugh booms through the room and you can’t help but giggle along with him. “I said I was sorry!” he says, hazel eyes twinkling with mirth. He pauses and glances at his closet, then nods his head in its direction. “Take a hoodie. Your pick.”

A smile–– one you try to downplay but fail miserably to–– creeps up your face. “Really?”

“Yeah,” Kuroo replies. “You can also shower here if you want. It's the least I can do after spilling my drink all over you.”

When you emerge from Kuroo’s bathroom in one of his thinner hoodies, a lot soberer and drying your hair, he’s not on the bed anymore. Quietly, you step out of his room and look for him through the house. People are crashed everywhere–– on the sofa, over the kitchen counter, even propped up against walls. The floor is covered with plastic cups and mysterious pools of liquid. Wrinkling your nose, you try your best to step around the messes, looking in every corner in the house for the raven-haired boy.

You find him back in his room, actually. He’s back on his bed scrolling through his phone, the light illuminating his sharp features. When he hears you close the door behind you, he looks up, eyes immediately zeroing in on the black hoodie over your torso. The corner of his mouth twitches up.

“Where’d you go?” you both ask at the same time. He chuckles; you grin. Crawling back onto the bed, you tell him to go first.

“I went around to make sure nothing’s broken,” he explains. “Perks of being the only sober intern in the house, I guess.”

A beat passes.

This house is rented. You forgot about that. All his expenses are paid for by your mother’s lab. You forgot about that. He fits in your world so well, like maybe he’s always had a spot there, that you forgot that Kuroo Tetsurou is only here for the summer.

“Right.”

Kuroo raises a brow. “And you?”

“I went to look for you.”

He smiles and holds his hands out like a magician at the end of a trick. “Well, you found me.”

“Yeah,” you muse. “I guess I did.” Aren’t you lucky.

With that, something shifts in the air. A contemplative expression crosses Kuroo’s face. Maybe he’s realised how his words come out sometimes. Kuroo often says things that sound like they have more than one meaning and it used to throw you off, but now you just go with it. You’ve even picked up that habit yourself. “Do you ever wish that you’d met someone earlier? Maybe under different circumstances?” he asks.

Sighing, you fall back against his mattress and stare up at the ceiling. Telling the truth feels easier when you can’t see him. “Yeah. All the time.” A few seconds pass. “Do you think we would’ve been friends if we went to the same college?”

He also lies down. You’re both back in the same positions you were in an hour ago, but something’s changed. “No,” he admits. You’re not surprised–– that’s what you’d expected. “I’d be a junior and you’d be a freshman. We probably would’ve never met. And even if we had, I wouldn’t be caught dead hanging out with a… freshie.” He chuckles softly at the end. “And look at me now,” he adds softly, more to himself than you. You look over at his face. A contemplative smile rests on his lips.

That urge to just say it returns.

“Kuroo, I think––”

“You’re my favourite p–– oh, my bad. You first.”

And it goes away again.

“Um, uh,” you stutter, “how long do you have left here?”

Kuroo raises his brows. “On this planet? Hopefully a while, Y/N.” He sees your unamused expression and drops the front. “Three more weeks.”

Your eyes widen. Eight weeks have already passed. Blood rushes to your ears. Eight entire weeks have already passed, meaning that in three weeks, Kuroo Tetsurou will leave forever. And in four, you will, too. Except you’ll come back. You’ve done so every summer since you were born, probably will do until you die.

But this place will never be the same as it used to. Not after him.

“Y/N?” Once everything comes back into focus, you see the concern riddling his features. “Everything okay?”

“Hmm? Yeah.”

Say it.

“You didn’t have too much to drink, right?”

Say it.

“I just got buzzed. What about you?”

“The only drink I was planning on having all went to your shirt.”

Say it.

“Kuroo.”

“Yeah?”

Not yet.

“Let’s go on an adventure.”

At two AM, everything is different. The streets feel different, the villas look different, and you–– you can’t put your finger on it but Kuroo Tetsurou has changed, too. He sits behind the wheel of your father’s white 1953 Cadillac with the convertible roof down, unruly hair blown back by the breeze, a euphoric grin stretched over his face. In the passenger’s seat, you sit with an equally large beam and your hands raised into the dark sky.

“Where to, Miss?” he shouts over the wind.

“The stars,” you shout back with a laugh. Kuroo’s cat-like eyes briefly flit over to your side profile, lips curving to form a smaller, more tender smile. But you miss that–– your gaze falls on him just a second after his return to the road.

“I heard you say Jack’s,” he says, smirking.

The 24/7 diner sticks out like a sore thumb in the row of sun-baked stucco and stone buildings with its bold neon lights and shiny exterior. During the day, it seems gaudy, way too American for a small town in northern Italy. But at night, this place feels like home. You’ve been stumbling into Jack’s completely shit-faced since you were sixteen. Of course, all those other times had been with the kids of your mother’s coworkers. All those other times, you could hardly remember what you even ordered when you woke up hours later.

But this time, you walk in with Kuroo Tetsurou at half-past-two in the morning, the chemicals running through your bloodstream epinephrine and dopamine, not ethanol; if you’re drunk then it’s on a feeling and your only poison is the boy next to you. You study his face and consider that thought. No, he’s not poison. He’s the antidote.

“Y/N!” the server exclaims, rushing over with two menus. “And Kuroo! My two favourite customers, but together this time!” Giovanni ushers you two to a booth by the window and takes your orders, purely for show, of course. He knows your orders by heart: the Lorenzo for Kuroo and the Quentin for you.

“With fries on both, please,” Kuroo adds, throwing you a wink. “Aren’t I a gentleman?”

“You only did that to have more for yourself,” you reply drily. Having him over at your house for dinner every night made picking up his idiosyncrasies so unbelievably easy. You know them like they’re your own. You know him like he’s your own.

Kuroo clutches his chest and pretends to be offended, then changes the conversation to what happened at the lab today, or rather, yesterday. That your mother and the other researchers are so close to finding a cure for the strain of virus that’s recently hit crickets in southern Italy.

“You should drop by again sometime,” he says. “Last time you came around was, what, two weeks ago?”

Your face breaks in a grin. “Are you saying you’ve missed me? Chemistry getting boring?” you tease, drawing a loud laugh from him.

“Sodium hydrogen, you little shit.” Your mother’s used this one on you before, but hearing it from him makes you giggle anyway.

Giovanni comes back with two plates, each loaded with fries. You both say your thanks and he retreats to the kitchen again, but not before wiggling his eyebrows at your reddening faces. Wordlessly, you grab your fork and knife and transfer at least half of your fries onto Kuroo’s plate. Kuroo stares at you with the slightest smile. That look sends your stomach into flips.

“What?” you question nonchalantly, cutting into your burger.

“Nothing,” he says, mirroring your actions. “Nothing at all.”

It’s hard to imagine that after spending almost every day together for eight weeks straight that there’s still more to learn about each other, but there is. You tell him more about your real home. Your best friend who called you at 3 AM last night because of timezones. Stories from every summer before this one, when you were a different person in the same place you are now.

He tells you more about Kenma, his best friend from high school. How they played on one of the best volleyball teams in Japan. Stories from training camp, literature class, the metro ride home after school–– you listen to every single one in rapt attention. There’s not enough time in the world for all the things you want to know about Kuroo Tetsurou, so you take what you can get. If only you’d known him before you’d known him.

“If we’d met earlier here, do you think we would’ve been friends?” you ask after paging Giovanni for the check.

“No,” he replies, picking up a few remaining fries with his fork instead of his fingers. The corners of your mouth turn up. That’s your thing. He considers the scenario seriously. “I think we met right when we should have.”

“What about the future?” you press, leaning into the conversation. “Let’s say we meet in two years here, instead of now. Would we be friends?”

Kuroo sets his fork down, eyes you steadily. “What’s this about?”

You blink. “What?”

“What’s with all these hypotheticals today?” Perhaps worried that he came off too harshly, Kuroo adds, “I thought I was the scientist.”

“I just… it feels like I’ve known you since forever.” This feels like it was meant to be, you don’t say. And I want to know you forever.

A sigh–– fond, but still a sigh–– blows through his lips. “Don’t tell me you believe in soulmates,” he says with a wicked grin.

“Are you calling me your soulmate?” The question, shamelessly genuine, painfully hopeful, leaves your mouth without you intending it to and you regret it instantly. Because Kuroo Tetsurou has told you many times that he does not believe in soulmates.

Is it so bad to dream, though?

You watch him carefully but he doesn’t say anything, just continues smiling wryly like you’d intended to tease him. Like he knows that you know better. But you don’t.

“Are you?” he suddenly replies. Sharp eyes hold yours, daring you to respond. Do you dare?

At that moment, Giovanni returns with the check. “Who’s paying?” he asks, unaware of the tense exchange that just occurred across the table. Inaudibly, you sigh in relief. Kuroo is about to say that it’s on him when he catches himself in the middle of his sentence, looks your way, then back to Giovanni. He says you’ll go Dutch. You nod in approval.

“So,” Kuroo drawls once you’ve both paid for your meals. “Where do we go from here?”

Good question.

Kuroo Tetsurou has never been to an outdoor club period. And though he’s been clubbing, he has never once gone dancing in his lifetime. You tell him that’s about to change as he parks the car in a lot near the venue. Before him, all your summer nights were spent here.

“You’ve been here for two months and you haven’t been to an outdoor club yet?” you ask while unbuckling your seatbelt. That can’t be possible. If you’d been in his shoes… an attractive college student in a foreign country for the summer, you would have gone wild.

“Nope. I’ve been a little busy, y’know, spending my days in a lab, handling chemicals, studying viruses, washing lab equipment, writing up reports for your mother and her colleagues, working on my own research on the side… the usual.” He flashes you a bright, sarcastic smile.

“Poor baby,” you coo, ruffling his hair. Kuroo laughs while you continue messing with the dark locks. “Was your first full day here the only tourist-day you’ve had so far?” His weekends, you already know, are spent either lounging around cafés, pools, or the great outdoors with you or the interns. But you’d assumed he’d had time to do some exploring on his own.

Kuroo nods. “And my guide wasn’t even that great,” he mutters, shooting you a dark look. “She sped through every attraction and hardly spoke a word outside of the tour to me. I think she hated me.”

You giggle and open the door, letting the music from the outdoor speakers infiltrate the bubble inside your car. “Maybe she was just nervous!” you say as you get out. That’s a lie.

“About what?” Kuroo follows suit, the gravel crunching beneath his feet. “I was so friendly to you and you just brushed me off each time.” He pouts.

But you don’t reply. Instead, you just grab his hands and pull him towards the venue. As you step into the boundaries marked by fairy lights and rustic wooden fences, Kuroo stops in his tracks and tugs on your intertwined hands. You glance down before up, trying to memorise how his hand looks around yours in the few seconds you can steal.

“Y/N,” Kuroo says. The strobe lights paint his skin pink, blue, purple like it’s a canvas. “Tell me why you were nervous.” Grammatically, it’s a command. And yet it sounds like he’s begging.

“What’s it mean to you?” you ask, feeling your heartbeat speed up in your chest. So what if you just… said it? What would happen?

“Everything?” he replies with a cheeky smile. The odds that he seriously means that are slim. But… they’re there. You shake that possibility out of your mind. That’s just the hope talking.

“Depends how convincingly you say it.” You tug on his arm. “C’mon. Let’s dance.” But he doesn’t budge–– he just continues to stand by the entrance of the club with an expectant look on his face. People are starting to stare.

“Fine,” you say with an eye roll. “I’ll tell you." Kuroo smirks, something self-congratulatory ready to leave his mouth, but then you let go of his hand and dance backwards into the throng of moving bodies. “But first, you’re gonna have to dance with me!” 

You allow yourself to be swallowed by the lively music, the people, the moment. Seconds later you’re deep enough into the crowd that you lose sight of Kuroo. Something in you says that he’ll show up soon, though. For now, you let yourself breathe. Forget about the heaviness of what-if’s, the itch to confess, the dread of the aftermath. Feelings are a lot like gravity. Sometimes they keep you grounded, other times, they weigh you down. This is one of those other times.

You dance up to a friendly-looking group of teens your age. Three guys and two girls. You shout your name and follow up with how it’s nice to meet them, hoping one of them finds you nice enough to keep around. Dancing alone in a club is one of the worst things that can ever happen to someone. Luckily, one of the girls–– the one wearing a purple wig–– pulls you in for a hug, drunkenly shouting back, “Bianca!” Bianca pushes you into their circle next to one of the guys and, just like that, you two start moving to the beat, feeling it in your feet, shoulders, hips. At one point, you turn around and take a good look at his face. The guy’s cute enough, but he’s not Kuroo. Still, you say nothing as he moves closer to you and grabs your hand, lifting it up and motioning for you to twirl.

Suddenly, a pair of hands grip firmly onto your waist and pull you out of the circle. “Hey!” You look down, suddenly realising they’re Kuroo’s. A shiver runs down your spine. He spins you around to face him. His lips are set in a firm line, eyes completely devoid of humour, nostrils slightly flared.

“Hi,” you say quietly, testing the waters.

“Hi,” he replies curtly. His hands are still on your waist. Selfishly, you choose not to point that out. Instead, you try to defuse the situation with a light question. Playful tone.

“Where were you this whole time?”

“Looking for you.”

“Well… you found me.” You flash him a sheepish grin. A peace offering of some sort.

“I did.” He doesn’t take it.

“Lucky you.”

Irritation finally seeps through his features. “You just left me on the dance floor!” he snaps. “And then when I find you after searching the entire venue, you’re dancing up on some random guy!”

“It was in good fun!” you retort, wriggling out of his grip. “And I wasn’t dancing up on him.” You want to ask if he’s jealous so badly, but you take a good look at his face and decide against that.

“Fun?” he asks incredulously. “Worrying about losing you, worrying about myself getting lost, then having to worry about that guy after finding you isn’t very fucking fun to me, Y/N!” The words fly out of his mouth like daggers without pause. Once finished, he looks at you with a disappointed gaze, shaking his head lightly, chest rising and falling with each heavy breath.

“I’m sorry,” you say, looking down at your shoes. It doesn’t matter if you disagree with him–– a sort of shame drills itself so deeply into your conscience that all you can think about is making things right again. “I didn’t think my actions through.”

A second passes. You wonder what he’s thinking.

“Hey, look at me.” Kuroo lifts your chin up with an index finger. Your wide eyes meet his narrow ones. Just as a pink beam glides over his face, his gaze softens, falls down to your lips. And then you feel his thumb on your chin, barely grazing the skin of your bottom lip. His Adam’s apple bobs up and down. The revelry in the background fades to dull beats against your eardrums. Suddenly, you register that he smells of, as usual, blackcurrant and amber.

But now you also smell of blackcurrant and amber.

You’re wearing his clothes. You smell of him.

Kuroo’s eyes crawl back up to yours, wide like he’s just been caught in the middle of a crime. You blink expectantly, ignoring the furious way your heart pounds in your chest. Shallow breaths puff through your slightly parted mouth.

“I am.” It comes out barely a whisper. C’mon. Kiss me. Kiss me. Kiss me kiss me kiss me kiss me kiss me kiss me––

You gently touch the hand he has on your chin. Kuroo jolts back like he’s been burned. “I’ll, uhm, I’ll be in the car,” he stutters, looking away from your face. He pushes through the sea of people, leaving you all alone on the dance floor, body doused in blue light, fingers touching the area his thumb had been as if preserving its print.

Kuroo hardly notices you slip into the passenger’s seat minutes later. He’s got his forearms hanging over the steering wheel and gaze fixed ahead into the darkness, mind probably running off to a place he wishes his body was, too.

As soon as you’ve buckled yourself in, Kuroo starts the car.

The entire drive home is silent.

Once Kuroo pulls into your courtyard and parks, he turns off the engine, unbuckles his seatbelt, and steps out of the car. Wordlessly, you follow his actions and meet him by the stairs to your door.

“Hi,” you say quietly. He doesn’t look at you.

“Hey.”

The two of you stand outside your front door in silence as you both consider what to say next. This can’t be the way it ends.

“I shouldn’t have… done that,” Kuroo says first.

“Done what?” You choose to play dumb. Call it selfish, but you want to hear him say it. Maybe then it’ll feel as real as it had been. Kuroo sighs and leans his shoulder against the stone wall, crossing his arms over his chest. There’s no way he can dance around what happened. Perhaps the past two months can be summed up as the development of a strong friendship with skilled doublespeak and metaphors and just enough artistic licence, but this can’t. And Kuroo knows that. He can’t feed you an alternative truth like he’s done so many times before. What’s more, he can’t lie to himself anymore. So maybe it’s better just to not speak at all.

Your eyes burn holes into the side of his face. Fine. You’ll concede first. “I was never nervous.”

Kuroo blinks, turns his head around to look at you. “What?”

“I was never nervous. I was playing it cool because I didn’t want to risk befriending you and getting attached.” I’m still playing it cool, you don’t say. And I’m already attached. “Guess I just came off as a bitch instead.” You laugh. “But can you blame me? You were this cute, older guy. Smart, too, since you were interning with my mom. You were my dream guy.”

An amused breath blows out of his nose. “Were?” he questions, grinning, only remembering the fragility of your platonic relationship a second later. “Um––”

“Are.” It slips out of your mouth without you realising. Fuck. Kuroo stills. It’s too late to take back your words now, so you might as well just keep going. “You still are my dream guy.”

Seconds pass and neither of you says anything. Sweat gathers in the palms of your hands. You start to feel your heartbeat through your neck. The buzz of the cicadas grows louder. Oppressive. Behind Kuroo, the sky is starting to turn pale blue and pink in the horizon. That means it’s almost sunrise. The night is almost over, and, hopefully, so is this awful conversation.

“And… you don’t feel the same.” Funnily, you feel like you’re lying. You’re telling Kuroo how he feels and you think you’re lying. Does that make sense? None of this night even feels real. God, you hope this has all just been a dream. Mustering a soft smile, you say, “That’s okay. Thank you for the party. And the adventure.” It was fun while it lasted. You feel the house key in your pocket and turn to unlock the door. “I hope this doesn’t change anything between us, Kuroo. Can we still be friends?” The words leave your mouth feeling like barbed wire. You know damn well you can’t still be friends.

And suddenly, you feel his calloused hands around your cheeks. Suddenly, his hot breath fans over your face.

“Can I kiss you?” he murmurs.

Your eyes close instantly. “Yes, please.”

And suddenly, his soft lips are on yours.

Kuroo breaks the kiss seconds later. “Fuck,” he whispers, resting his forehead against yours, touching the tips of your noses together. “Y/N, I don’t want to be friends. Fuck.” A dry chuckle leaves his mouth. He pauses to collect his thoughts but decides that that can wait. Instead, he presses another kiss to your lips so fervently that he backs you up against the wall with no space between your bodies. You wonder if he can feel your heartbeat like this, chest to chest. Kuroo’s hands travel down your waist and rest on your hips. His tongue runs across your tongue, your teeth, the insides of your mouth. You gently suck on it, drawing a satisfied moan from him. When the kiss ends, you see that his lips are red and cheeks are swollen. A warm feeling spreads through your chest. “I thought I could be happy just being friends with you but I can’t. I want you so bad it hurts. Not to mention, when I saw you in my hoodie?” His fingers pinch the material. “I thought God was testing me or some shit.”

“Sure didn’t feel like you wanted me that way,” you retort, still breathless.

“In my defence,” Kuroo says, thumbs tracing your cheekbones, “I was very scared.”

“Of what?”

It looks like he’s about to tell you, but he changes his mind and doesn’t answer. He grabs your hand and pulls you back to the car with a cheeky grin. “I’ll tell you only if you tell me where we can watch the sunrise.”

Kuroo holds your hand, stroking your thumb the entire drive there.

After a short hike, you plop down on the grassy hillside, supporting your body with outstretched arms in the back. Kuroo sits down beside you with one of his hands covering yours, fingers intertwined like a honeysuckle vine around a hazel tree. You tell him that you grew up running along this hill with your parents. It used to be your playground. Maybe, you think, it’s time to make new memories here.

“Beautiful,” Kuroo breathes, a wonderstruck look in his eyes. The sun’s just risen halfway above the pink and blue horizon, the saturated orange casting the entire city below gold. It’s not just the city, though. He’s also gold. He’s just as beautiful. You watch him with a soft smile on your lips, noting how his wide eyes and slack jaw return to normal as he stares off into the distance. After resting your head on his shoulder, you fix your eyes on the sunrise ahead. You wonder what he’s thinking so quietly about.

“Penny for your thoughts?” you finally ask once the sun has finished revealing itself.

Kuroo blinks, returning to reality, but continues to stare straight ahead. “I was just thinking about… soulmates.”

You lift your head off his shoulder. “Don’t tell me you believe in soulmates now,” you tease.

“Hmm.” He turns to look at you, the sun turning his hazel eyes the colour of honey. That same wry smirk from Jack’s returns to his face.

“You wanna know why I was so scared?”

“Pray tell.”

“Because I’ve never felt this way towards anyone.”

“That’s bullshit.”

“No,” Kuroo laughs, laying his head down in your lap, looking up into your eyes. “I’m serious. I used to purposely stay away from girls in high school. Same in college. Same all the way until you somehow wormed your way into my life. That’s why we wouldn’t have been friends.” You cock your head to the side.

“Why?” you ask, running your fingers through his hair.

Kuroo’s eyelids flutter shut. He inhales deeply before talking. “My parents are divorced. The years before the divorce were… very ugly.” 

(He spares you the details of the midnight arguments, the smashed plates, the holes in the walls. He spares you the details of how he only ever knew how to fall asleep with his head sandwiched between two pillows, how he hasn’t seen his sister in a decade, how he’ll curse and snap but never yell because he always feels like a child again around the noise. That’s for another time, if you’ll have any.) 

“I still remember all the fighting and yelling. For the longest time, that’s all I knew about marriage and relationships.”

“Did you think all relationships were like that? Fighting and yelling?” you ask.

“For a while, yeah. I’m still a little scared of that, to be honest. Ending up in a relationship where all you do is fight.” Kuroo sighs. “But that’s not the only thing. I thought I wouldn’t know how to love someone, growing up like that.” At that, your fingers pause in his hair.

“Wait,” you say, furrowing your brows. A wave of immense sadness (not for yourself, for him) washes over you. “You think you wouldn’t know how to love someone else?”

“Thought.” Kuroo cracks open his eyes and smiles up at you. “I’m in the process of changing my mind.”