#i am fascinated with them
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The funniest thing is that Borzoi puppies look mostly normal.
And then they turn into Borzois when you aren't looking.
#text#borzois#i am fascinated with them#would get one if i ever wanted a dog#im not convinced they are real#imagine adopting a lost puppy or something#and it just grows into a borzoi#first off that would be very cool#but if you didnt know this breed existsd it would be like oh my god what is happening to my dog
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Rereading Dickens Christmas Carol for the first time in a long time. And the more I reread, the more it strikes me how seamlessly a queer reading could slip within these pages. Not an especially twee reading, wherein all Scrooge's troubles start and end with grief over Jacob Marley's death. For we know that Scrooge was a "Tight-fisted hand at the grindstone, Scrooge! a squeezing, wrenching, grasping, scraping, clutching, covetous, old sinner!" And we know that he and Marley were "two kindred spirits"
And perhaps that very fact makes the similarities to queer life, unintended as they most likely were by Mr. Dickens, achingly poignant to me. Scrooge is, we're told, "secret and self-contained and solitary as an oyster." How much that resonates, for so many of us who shield our innermost selves but from a select group of friends. And we know that Scrooge and Marley were, at the very least, certainly that for one another. Scrooge is Marley's sole mourner; his sole executor and beneficiary; and even Dickens notes, "friend." How reminiscent is that of queer couples across history, estranged from their families?
Scrooge lives in a set of chambers that once belonged to Marley—clearly Dickens wanted us to believe Scrooge gave up his own dwellings after Marley's death to economize. But with only a flicker of change, those chambers become _their chambers, rented by Marley as the senior member of the couple. The place is so desolate Dickens notes "one could scarcely help fancying it must have run there when it was a young house, playing at hide-and-seek with other houses, and have forgotten the way out again." The perfect abode for two queer misers who wanted no one prying into their business.
Marley's name is still above the door of Scrooge's counting-house: a mark by which, no doubt, Dickens meant to convey Scrooge such a penny-pincher he couldn't bother to have it changed. But a thing can be both! mark of frugality to ludicrous excess and! mark of mourning. "sometimes," Dickens opines, "People new to the
business called Scrooge Scrooge, and sometimes Marley, but he answered to both names. It was all the same to him."
This is why "death of the author" matters so much, in expanding our interpretations of texts. It is vastly far from the lens Dickens would have intended. But, the idea of a ghost of queerness, so taboo in the society it could barely be glanced at sidewise in this tale that is all about the inexplicable and yet that lingers over everything becomes an astonishing lens through which to read this book. Thinking of Scrooge as a queer man, his "melancholy dinner at his usual melancholy tavern" becomes a eerie prefiguring of the hollowness of days spent by Isherwood's A Single Man. In this universe, little wonder Scrooge doubly hates mention of time with family, marriage, etc. when the precise nature of his grief is both unacknowledged and unacknowledgable.
And readings like this are vital, because the uncomfortable truth is, discrimination doesn't "discriminate between sinners and saints", to borrow a Miranda phrase. It is easy, in my liberal circles, to fight for queer people who hold "the good sorts of politics". But what about men like Michael Hess, culpable for supporting Reagan even as his contemptuous homophobia let the aids epidemic run rampant? How much harder is it to remember Michael had a partner? That he deserves empathy and compassion for being practically tarred and feathered out of the party upon his own aids diagnosis?
Expanding our imaginative universes to include queerness, not as redemptive panacea, but merely as one aspect of identity, personality, often in vicious conflict with others. Even! as we consider those stories equally worthy of being told feels vital if we're ever to truly express the complexity of what queer humanity looks like.
#forgive my less than articulate maundering#am currently listening to a truly splendid full-cast adaptation of said#Christmas Carol#and wanted to jot these things down before I forgot them in the flow of the work.#Scrooge as both! cruel bastard bitching about half a crown he'll pay Bob even though he won't be in the office on Christmas#fuming about his pockets being picked as he scathingly condemns the poor for not throwing themselves#into the oh! so! generous work-houses. And _also! deeply bereaved husband just makes him so! much more _alive and fascinating to me#if anyone knows of good Marley/Scrooge longfic where not an inch! of their dastardliness is sanded off I'd _kill for it#Jacob Marley#Ebenezer Scrooge#Ebenezer Scrooge/Jacob Marley#queer stuff#history#book babbling#lit geekery
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Bats and Phantoms - Part 4
Part 3 | Masterpost
Damian and Specter
Many strange things have been happening lately. First, it was Todd suddenly becoming obsessed with a scholarship student of Gotham U. Damian had witnessed the disgusting display of infatuation from his elder brother whenever he stalked the young man. Something had happened and it surely involved the death of the joker.
Second, it was Richard who was utterly besotted with a mysterious meta that went by the name Wraith. They had found mentions of him, wherein some heroes commented on how he had helped them with issues that would have them contact the JLD.
Third was Cassandra who had been the one to meet the strange redheaded girl who shot the Scarecrow with an unknown weapon in the form of a gun. She was right to be wary but Cassandra, like their brothers, was actively seeking this girl out. (She was no longer in Gotham from what he understood.)
But nevermind that. For all he was an Al Ghul, he was still a Wayne. He was Damian Wayne at the moment, not Robin. So getting kidnapped was... Well, he cannot understand how Drake deals with this. He recalls the number of times Todd has had to save Drake from mediocre kidnappers who needed to be taught a lesson on how to kidnap people.
But his captors seemed to be slightly better than that of Drake's. He can hear his father telling him not to bite any of them. They were foolish oafs that pressed the barrel of a gun against the side of his head. Damian glared, snarling at the man who seemed startled that the youngest of the Wayne's could react in such a way.
Before he could inact his plan, Damian caught sight of the strangest thing. There was a hand passing through the wall, waving right at him. The hand pointed to the ceiling and Damian hesitated to look up. He stared, nothing happened, and then he saw it.
A girl passed through the ceilings, wispy white hair and Lazarus green eyes boring into his soal. She smiled, pressing a finger to her lips and all he can do is nod.
She floats down, lingering just behind his captors and moving left and right so she wouldn't be seen. A mischievous grin spread across her face before she disappeared and then reappeared in front of the men.
"B̶̢̯̮͙̳̫̯̜̠͎̟͔̱̺̦͎̓̃̑͑̄̐̈́͋̐̅̽̿́͋̆͗͊̾̐̊̂̋̑̎̈́̐̄̾̈̇̽̄̂̇͜͜͝͠͝͝͝Ơ̷̧̨̛̛̳͎̜̪͎͚͓̱̜͔͈̜͇̳̬̼̯̦̽͛̇̇̈́̀̄́̃̏͊̓̃̌̀̏͋̌́̂̕̚͠͠ͅͅͅO̵̡̜̖̭͕̟̞̼̐̎̐͛̍̊͛͂̊́̓̂͆̍̾͊̾̈̄̿͑̾̊̎́́̐̂̈̾̿̿̈́̉̇̈́̈̍̚͘̕̚̕͝͝͝͝͝͠!"
The noise she made startled the man, making them drop theirs guns before she directed the most beautiful uppercut he has ever seen. Damian was in utter awe as she mocked his captors, flying around them and giggling as they were led in circles until they were tripping over their own feet.
"Woops. Kidnapping people is bad, y'know. Don't do it." She scolded, taking their guns and throwing it against the wall. "Skedaddle!"
The men—cowards—ran like hell and he was left with the girl. Damian froze when she turned towards him, before she's hurriedly untying him from the ropes and peering at him with a curious look.
"Hello there, I'm Specter." She introduced, offering her hand to him.
Damian accepted, feeling her cold skin through her gloves. "Damian Wayne. Thank you for saving me, Miss Specter." Even though he clearly didn't needed it.
The way she spoke and acted reminded her of Grayson—loosely.
"All in a day's work!" Specter huffed, looking utterly proud with herself before she's dragging Damian out the warehouse. "Okay, so. Since you're safe and all... I need a bit of help. See, I saved some kittens on the way here and I can't keep them since I ain't from Gotham. But since you're a Wayne and all, would you mind?"
She spoke fast, almost without breathing, before she's rushing away and bringing back a box of kittens. Three to be exact.
Damian stares, and stares, and then looks at Specter strangely.
"Please?" She pouted, pushing the box towards him. Damian's doesn't even hesitate to take it, sighing and shaking his head in exasperation.
"Thank you! Oh, I've already names them. This one is Johannes, this one is Galileo, and this one is Henrietta. Please take care of them. I have to go now!" Specter bid her farewell, petting the fussy kittens before she flashed Damian a toothy-fangy smile.
She vanished soon after, leaving him to contemplate it she was even real in the first place.
Elle had only wanted to visit her brother but when she saw a bunch of men dragging an unconscious boy into a warehouse, she just had to help. Jazz taught her better than to abandon people in need. She had to set down the box of kittens she had found in a corner close to the warehouse, before rings of light appeared over her body and everything became inverted.
The boy was familiar—maybe a celebrity since he was getting kidnapped. He'd have to search him up later.
It wasn't hard saving him, the kidnappers were easily spooked. When the men ran, she stuck her tongue out and blew raspberries at the cowards before turning to the boy. He had green eyes—natural ones unlike hers and Danny's that were only present in their ghost forme.
"Hello there, I'm Specter." The Hero name Jazz had helped her with rolled of her tongue so easily. It made her brighten up in seconds as she offered her hand to the boy.
"Damian Wayne."
Ah, so he was a Wayne! Danny mentioned them to her. Speaking of Danny, he really needed to check up on him.
She remembered the kittens pretty quickly, and since Damian was a Wayne, he'd have more space for them than Danny. So she grabbed the kittens, all named after scientists that were related to astronomy, and she entrusted the cute things to him.
Template: WHERE ARE YOU????
The superior copy: I just saved a Wayne
The superior copy: Do you know Damian Wayne??
Template: The youngest
The superior copy: I just gave the kittens I found!
The superior copy: On my way tho
She was going to miss Johaness, Galileo, and Henrietta, even if she only had them for a brief moment. Maybe she'll get to meet them again in the future.
(Later on, Damian lurks in the shadows, waiting for Dick to finally leave the batcomputer alone so he can stalkinvestigate his saviour.)
Part 5 | Masterpost
#dpxdc#dc x dp#danny phantom#dani fenton#dani phantom#damian wayne#damian al ghul#robin#dc robin#Elle: KITTENS!#Danny in a video call: Okay here me out... The Waynes? THOSE ARE THE BATS!#Danny channeling his inner Wes: Im pretty sure the Red Hood is Jason Todd#Dan: Yeah lile the clutzy brucie is batman#Elle: Kitties? :(#Damian: Grayson move i need the computer#Dick who's downloading every distorted picture of Wraith: Later baby bat. im not stopping until i get a clear picture#Dami in the future: and these are my children Johannes Henrietta and Leo. Their mother entrusted them to me and I am waiting for her return#Elle who the kittens immediately recognize: FASCINATING#Bats and Phantoms
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Wait, did you put a photo of Vil and Neige as kids in Eric’s office??
oh good, I was afraid that wasn't going to read properly and people would just be like "what is this supposed to be". :') but yeah! I like to think Eric was pretty fond of Neige as a kid! single dad sees orphan child approximately the same age as his own son and goes "hmm. okay, you guys are going to be friends now." (this did not go as well as he'd hoped.)
(also I do love how it's kind of a running joke that everyone loves Neige except for Vil, who's standing over in the corner and just seething with furious irrational hatred. someday maybe he'll find someone who doesn't think Neige is the best thing since cinnamon rolls.)
#art#twisted wonderland#vil: am i massively projecting my own hangups and insecurities onto someone who i would otherwise find only mildly annoying#vil: no it must be neige who is wrong#idk i just like neige a lot! he's sweet and i find him fascinating honestly#there's ONE offhanded comment about how oh yeah he's been orphaned since a young age and just never talks about it#he lives with a bunch of dwarves and cooks and cleans for them and this has been going on since he was like eight#like. hello?!#there's a whole backstory here that we're never going to get more than this single crumb of and frankly that makes it better#man if i had a nickel for every fandom about fairytale characters in high school#where i instantly fell in love with the snow white character#i'd have two nickels et cetera you know the rest
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hi!! I think your art is *so cool* o(≧∇≦o)
do you think you could draw more moshang? either post canon or that au you did last time?? (baby mobei has my heart and all I own)
(˵ •̀ ᴗ •́ ˵ ) oh! how about return to childhood—moshang flavor?
don't question this king, shang qinghua, he knows what he's about
#just because junshang is going to throw a fit and doesn't know how to capitalize on a good thing doesn't mean mbj is the same#svsss#moshang#mobei jun#shang qinghua#mbj#sqh#return to childhood#he's finally small enough to fit on sqh's lap!#he's going to have sqh carry him *everywhere* until his qi evens out and he becomes full-sized again#maximize the spoiled prince vibe - sqh is going to be exhausted by the end of this he is not having as much fun as sqq#anyway the demon court is just going to have to bite their tongues and deal with it otherwise they'll have a full sized mbj come after them#though tbh this would be a fascinating au because yeah... just like with lbh there's probably enough people who'd be willing to gun for mbj#when he's small and severely weakened#but i love the idea of his throne suddenly being to big for him so he just makes sqh assist (cuddle)#anyway anon thanks for the prompt!! i am SO happy to draw more moshang and welcome any and all suggestions#either just about them or about the childhood!au#i really should play with the concept more... i have not been able to get into a writing mood lately but it'd be nice to finally write#a svsss fic - i've got at least a couple for both mdzs and tgcf after all#until then though: art!
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I’m sorry Jon M Chu, what do you MEAN your first idea was to have Idina Menzel and Kristen Chenoweth play Galinda’s parents. WHAT
#Love the the One short day we got#But also. My god that would have been…hilarious? Adorable? Utterly fascinating? What an idea#Love that all involved seem to have woken up everyday and been like “how can we make this movie gayer” good work everyone#Also Galinda with two moms? Is the weird societal pressures of being a gayby how you got the comp het girl it happens#Also momsie and momsicle would be sitting there reading that letter like “so she’s in love with this green roommate of hers right”#Alternatively would they have had one of them in drag to play her father. Equally stellar idea#Wicked#lesbian Galinda upland#dearest darlingest momsie and momsicle#No actually I am totally coming around to this Galinda with two moms thing it might’ve worked#Not sure changing her family background works 100% thematically but I find this idea charming and compelling nonetheless#gelphie
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consider,,,a lucanis who is in love with emmrich, a spite who is in love with rook, a rook in love with emmrich, and emmrich who is in love with all three but wants lucanis, spite, and rook to get together because he feels he is not the type of man any of them deserve...
bonus points for spite being the one to realize just what sort of love quadrilateral is going on and is the one to get them all together.
#the angst potential alone#if i can convince my brain to write something other than smut i will in fact consider writing this#JUST. THEM BEING SO MESSY.#SPITE REALIZING THAT EMMRICH IS GETTING CLOSER TO LUCANIS TO TRY AND SWAY ROOK INTO FALLING FOR THEM#LUCANIS REALIZING THAT EMMRICH IS IN LOVE WITH ROOK AND DECIDING EMMRICH'S HAPPINESS IS MORE IMPORTANT#SO HE CONSIGNS HIMSELF TO HIS UNHAPPINESS#Rook could also be in love with all three in this scenario but i think it'd be SO FASCINATING for it to be Emmrich!!#Emmrich lamenting that he found the people he loves at a time he believes to be too late#consigning himself to a bachelor's life. he has his studies he has manfred he's content#and then he meets lucanis who is EXACTLY the type of man he fancied as a young man#Someone with so much heart but some rougish charm. appearing cold but so fucking warm under the surface. misunderstood perhaps#the same way he and death are#and so he is smitten. taken by this man and his watchful eye and his steady hands. fascinated by the demon living inside him#the demon who is so curious about this world. who craves to live and understand and emmrich who at his core wants nothing more than to TEAC#and rook. gods emmrich not having the same instant attraction as he did to lucanis but it all hitting him in the chest one night#reckless rook who takes blows they could have dodged to protect him. who always treats his necromancy with respect and curiosity#rook who always reaches out to touch him but stops their hand just shy of making contact. rook who is uncertain but willing to try#rook who is YOUNG and full of possibility and deserves more than whatever shell emmrich believes himself to be#i am just!!!!!!! do you see my VISION#something can happen here!! i'm fucking telling ya'll!!!!!#emmrich volkarin#lucanis dellamorte#dragon age rook#dragon age veilguard#lucanis x emmrich#lucanis x rook#spite x rook#emmrich x rook#emmrich x lucanis#emmrich x rook x lucanis
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coming back home.
@barrenclan
#patfw#patfw fanart#patfw spoilers#rainhaze#THE NEW ISSUE. IT SURE WAS AN ISSUE HUH. I AM NORMAL. SO NORMAL IN FACT#THAT I REDREW A PANEL OF THE COMIC IN MS PAINT#i need someone to put this horrid beast down already. he needs to DIE i am not joking. euthanise him. please.#he is soooo fascinating.#i CANT get over his expression in this panel. WHAT IS WRONG WITH HIM#hes smiling .is it a genuine smile? is he smiling bc he knows how this is going to go and all he can do is laugh now?#why. why why why the smile. at first he looks shocked or surprised or terrified but THEN it turns into this playful soft grin. as if full o#nostalgia. or maybe grief. or maybe joy. he looks like he knows something we dont.#did he accept that his family is going to get wiped out (HIS FAULT HE KILLED HER HE RIPPED HER THROAT OUT) and is just happy he got to see#them one last time?#this is so weird. before killing asphodel he was so terrified of meeting them. of facing his past and acknowledging what he became.#is him smiling a symbol of him giving up? becoming part of defiance? hes not running away anymore. he doesnt have to.#jesus.#my art#wanted to make him look as fucked up as i could. i hope he looks like a corpse or perhaps a starved dog to you
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cannot stop rotating wl!gem in my head after that episode. encouraging pearl and impulse to go after her enemies and then gossiping with scott about them afterwards. insane behaviour. the discussion about impulse. missing secret life. fucking helllll. i'm obsessed with how dedicated she is to the anti pearl and impulse campaign. how dedicated she is to painting them as aggressors, antagonizers, going into her base and looking through her fields, when she's undeniably the one starting shit with them. that one stream clip of her saying she's going to channel breakup coldness dialogue from subnautica against pearl. iconic behaviour. i love divorce
#wild life#geminitay#shiny duo#pearlescentmoon#impulsesv#scott smajor#wild life spoilers#i am 100% going to have more coherent thoughts on this ehen its not 2am#im also kind of obsessed with how shes playing this season socially. Like. she has all these alliances shes msde and it feels like very few#of them actually matter. shes making all of these superficial connections#endearing herself#but its just that. superficial#meanwhile shes proliferating a hate campaign against pearl (with impulse kind of being stray fire) and making a point to place herself#as the innocent#idk. fascinated#obligatory c! not cc!#good shit
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tim kon cassie trio on the mind today. not a love triangle, not a polycule, but a secret third thing (when a gay man, a lesbian, and their pet bisexual freak love each other very much...)
#i just think post breakup and post coming out koncassie are like platonic soulmates almost. their bond is so important to meeee#and then tim and cassie have that unbreakable bond of The Ones Left Behind. they are so important to each other#and then tim and kon are. well. gestures at their everything#like ... they're such a fascinating trio bc kon and cassie make such good mirrors in some ways#and then tim and cassie are really good mirrors of each other in other ways#and they're both obsessed with kon. they both just love him so so much. and. it hits#i am going to place them in a situation or so help me.#like something about that romance that isn't. btwn koncassie and then timcassie both trying to kiss kon through each other#and the way that evolves as all three of them come out and do some reflection and self discovery#idk it's just genuinely sooo tasty. putting them in some soup as we speak#rimi talks#tim#kon#cassie
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i see your "'does he want to lick my boots or chop off my hands' is a Nicki reference" and raise you "what if Armand's relationship with sex is so fucked that his two modi are total submission and 'don't touch me or I'll chop off your hands' and Louis is still clowning on his trauma" in this essay I will
#I'm not getting involved in the iwtv TV discourse I didn't avoid the ascended astarion drama to get sucked into this#So don't come at me with any of that 'who is the real villain' stuff please#They are all evil and they are all traumatized and I love all of them deeply#Armand#louis de pointe du lac#iwtv#iwtv s2#Iwtv s02e05#the vampire armand#louis iwtv#I am both aghast and fascinated by the fact that Louis called Armand a groomed bitch because holy shit Louis my girl#There's a dynamic TM here and I want to study it under a microscope#Just two traumatized bottoms traumatizing each other even further#I really hope they'll address how badly Louis handles Armand's trauma tho cause it's so cold#Look at me going I don't want to be part of the discourse and then writing a whole ass paper in the tags#loumand#interview with the vampire
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the thing about larys strong is that i think he's been lonely his entire life, lonelier than even he realised/admitted to himself. he craves connection, someone to see him for who he is. and that's what's been guiding most of his actions throught the entire time we've known him.
when he saw alicent being unheard and unseen, he tried to form a connection with her as he saw himself in her (through manipulations of course, but his intention there when saying "i could be your ally" were sincere). but she rejected him (by refusing to see him as a man, by being horrified at his true self (the harrenhal fire), etc) and thus he grew to resent her and want to control her/humiliate her like she "humiliated him", probably thinking it was enough because of the power she gave him.
but then viserys died and alicent's power died with him.
spoilers for season 2 of house of the dragon below the cut
i think his "love" for her... changed or was put on the back of his mind after 2x04, especially after he sees the moon tea and she's in pain. when he asks her about criston, his reaction to her words is as if he is confused, as if he's recalculating what he thought of her because he's seeing her in a whole new light.
and maybe he is seeing her truly for the first time ever.
he said "you and i are the same", was always listening in on her conversations to gather information, maybe even convincing himself by doing so that she truly was like him. but, i think that, when larys says "you have not been yourself" is his way of saying "who are you? are you who i've always thought you were or someone i do not know?" and has to change his view of her, of what he convienced himself he saw in her.
maybe he sees that he's been living in a lie made of his own words.
so, when the council scene happens, he pities her and rejects her idea, because it has no ground and she's grasping at straws. (i do think he does feel sorry for rejecting her but he also doesn't have enough solid ground with aemond as regent (his position in the small council is fairly new) and slighting aemond would cost him the power he has, so he stays quiet and looks away).
however, he also manages to drive a nail to alicole's coffin but he walks away without looking back at the mess it left.
they then don't share a scene at all for the rest of the season.
from then on all his scenes are with aegon, and we see a side of larys we haven't seen before.
ageon gave him power (of course larys manipulated aegon with the Hand comment) because of his "loyalty" following blood and cheese (i still believe larys "let it happen") and made him his master of whispers. he placed larys in the small council (when alicent never did in the 6 years she acted as regent) and gave him status outside of the dungeons. he "brought him [larys] out of the shadows" in a way.
the show has made a point to tell us, since episode one of season two, that larys has been looking at aegon the same way he used to look at alicent in season one, staring him down as if he could see what he's made of, constantly analysing and calculating how to best approach him.
he made small attempts at conversations and funny lines ("that castle is more crippled than me") as the whole alicent thing is going on.
and then the battle of rook's rest happened.
with aegon barely holding on, we have a scene where larys is honest, vulnerable, sincere maybe for the first time ever (yes there's manipulation, but also genuine compassion). he sees the struggles aegon will have to face because he lived them himself.
like with alicent in the weirdwood, he tried to form a connection with aegon. but where alicent "rejected" his true self, aegon instead listened to what larys was saying, saw the truth in it and raged, which made larys feel seen and heard, beyond manipulation and twisted words, probably for the first time in his life
larys, for all his talk that love is a downfall, craves connection, the desire to not be alone in the world. he does feel love.
and whereas alicent rejected his love and was disgusted by his true self, aegon welcomed his help, invited his advice, and embraced his aid to become stronger
i think larys will be loyal to him as long as aegon allows his love and it does not fester into resentment, like his love for alicent did
#larys strong#house of the dragon#hotd#hotd spoilers#house of the dragon spoilers#i think he might have loved alicent in a way but her rejection soured his feelings and 'made them ugly'#i think the final nail in the coffin of his love for her was her horror at his actions at harenhall#because what if what he did and his confession was his way of saying to alicent 'see me love me this is who i am'#and her horror (another rejection) was what made him say 'if you cant love me i will make you fear me and loath me'#im never giving up on larycent#but i am *fascinated* by larys and his motivations#and larysgon is alive and thriving#i mean#they had the whole 'lets run away together just for a little while' canon queerbait scene
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Trying to figure out if the death threat was because I said you shouldn't leave food offerings in wilderness areas, or because I said banishing isn't the same as cleansing 🤔 probably the offering thing, right? Because they said I was single-handedly ruining earth's ecosystem, that doesn't have very much to do with banishing.
#this is truly bugging me#the ecosystem thing threw me for a loop#like sure you want me to meet horrific sexually violent ends anon naturally and I don't begrudge you that#but what does it have to do with the ecosystem??#some of these people you just want to buy a cup of coffee and hear them talk#show me the shape of your brain you beautiful soul I am fascinated
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This is how these two went right?
#dungeon meshi#laios#kabru#I need to ramble excuse me#this is just disorganized thoughts dont look too much into it#RRRHRRHRHRGHRGHRGHRAAAAAAAAA#laios likes monsters more than he likes people#people bore him#so he just loves knowing about mosnters and ignores people#kabru has a fascinating interest in people#going beyond the normal limit of getting to know a person#and he cant understand why anyone would like monsters#none of them are normal about this#literal opposites of each other i am exploding
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The fact that Essek storms off "in a huff" and is literally brought to tears when he sees Caleb mourning Molly...there's just so many interesting implications for shadowidomauk there.
It's the fact that Essek saw Caleb kiss Molly on the forehead the way he kissed him--saw Caleb repeat these familiar phrases in battle to Lucien that he once used to comfort Essek. Essek learning Caleb's love language, and seeing it reflected in how he treats Mollymauk.
It's Essek seeing Caleb at his lowest, at his most desperate and hopeless--how very wrong it feels to see him like this, how painful it is to watch him fall apart over losing Mollymauk. "Caleb Widogast, have you ever accepted defeat?"
Because of all things, it is Molly's death that leaves Caleb more brokenhearted than Essek's ever seen him, the only time he's ever truly admitted to knowing defeat--"Maybe today. For the first time." The way Caleb came all this way and tried so desperately to save him, and it still wasn't enough. He poured his whole heart and soul into that ritual, and it just wasn't enough.
Essek being moved by the Nein's own grief, choked up and crying for this person that he never even met. Insisting over and over, "It's not fair--it's not fair...We've just all come so far. It's not fair." And it's the moment that Caleb kisses Molly on the forehead and says his goodbyes that really breaks Essek's heart, the passion and gutting loss of Caleb's own grief that sends Essek storming off and fighting back tears.
Do you think...Essek ever tells Kingsley what happened that day? How hard Caleb tried to save him--how much it shattered him when Tealeaf was still lying dead in his arms? Do you think he ever told King about the forehead kiss and how tender Caleb was with him--how he must surely love him? Do you think Essek admits that even he was crushed when Tealeaf didn't wake, that he never knew him before, but still mourned him all the same?
Do you think he ever quietly tells Kingsley that he's happy he came back, how much it means to him--especially for Caleb's sake--
Do you think Kingsley ever kisses either of the wizards on the forehead and everything just. Kinda falls into place for Essek--
#mollymauk#caleb widogast#essek#kingsley tealeaf#widomauk#shadowidomauk#sorry i am just...having feelings about all of them again#would love love LOVE to see a post campaign scene where all three of them get to talk#where maybe king is fascinated by essek because hes still New and doesnt make his heart ache with old memories#and essek just. cant help but tell king just how important he always seemed to be to caleb#because he feels like king deserves to know and caleb never got to share those feelings--
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it’s actually so wild to me that this fairly quirky YA type show gave both of its main characters deaths that can, in one way or another, solidly be considered hate crimes. they were both flat out murdered as a result of being A) gay and effeminate or B) brown (south asian, specifically) and you could argue whether or not those kids thought of it that way in the moment or whatever but the bottom line is that they would not have been in the situations that killed them if they weren’t of their respective minorities. like legitimately that is a ballsy choice for this kind of netflix show, let alone for the two Main Characters, and i respect it big time
#rambling#i think about this a lot#you could brush charles’ off as a hate crime by proxy since it was in response to him Stopping a hate crime#but that would be stupid. like you think what happened to him would’ve happened if he was white? doubtful#as a mixed person the way i see it is that in that moment- when he protected that pakistani kid- he went from being tolerated#by being/acting just white enough and with enough other jock traits to sort of fit in amongst them#to all at once proving to them that no- he is in fact The Other. he isn’t one of us he’s one of Them.#and as such what happened to him would’ve been a bonafide hate crime. even if they were to give an excuse like ‘he got in our way’ or ‘he#made a fool out of us’ or whatever else. even if those boys didn’t fully UNDERSTAND the racism in their own intentions/actions#it still would be. because that would not have happened to a white boy. period#anyway. genuinely fascinating choice they made with the way they presented his death- especially considering it was not#remotely similar in the comics. neither of them had the hate crime aspect going on really up til yockey’s narrative choices#so props to him. man’s got balls#dead boy detectives#charles rowland#edwin payne#edit: I will say that I don’t think the boys in edwin’s case technically murdered him nor would I call them murderers#because I can’t imagine a single one of them actually thought that ritual was gonna do anything more than make him piss himself#it was still hate-based bullying. like they still absolutely did what they did because he’s visibly effeminate and easily clickable#and all in all: gay. but when I say edwin was murdered I don’t really mean by those boys. I mean those boys dragged him into the situation#(kicking and screaming) that GOT him murdered by a demon. and he would not have been in that position if not for being gay.#I’ll say it again because last time I talked about this someone got real pissy in my inbox: I am not excusing the actions of the boys that#got him killed nor am I saying what they did wasn’t based in homophobia. i am just clarifying that they didn’t intend on killing anyone or#think whatsoever that someone getting killed was even a possibility (as opposed to charles’ killers who definitely had to have thought he#could be killed even if that might not have been the premeditated goal of every boy involved)#but the fact that edwin was ultimately intentionally killed by a demon counts as murder to me#someone killed him on purpose. that’s murder#the demon probably didn’t give a shit about this human teenager’s sexuality but regardless he ended up there for being gay.#so. just. a clarification
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