#i am attracted to women. she is a woman. it is still possible.

[local-limebug]

it physically hurts me to try and write a friendship like the one i have with my best friend and realizing that it sadly reads like the characters are romantically in love

like bro wdym they can't be half of each other's heart and soul without being in love. i literally do it everyday with her. wdym they can't love each other with a love so strong it defies labels yet not want to sleep with each other or get married. I LITERALLY DO IT EVERYDAY WITH HER.

[inkskinned]

the thing about some men is that they want you to remember, at all times, that you are underneath them. that with one word or look or "joke", you will stay beneath them. that even "exceptions" to the rule are not true exceptions - the commonly cited statistic that one in eight men believe they could win against serena williams.

women's gymnastics is often not seen as real gymnastics. whatever the fuck non-euclidian horrors rhythmic gymnasts are capable of, it's often tamped down as being not a sport. some of the most dominant athletes in the world are women. nobody watches women's soccer. despite years of dancing and being built like a fucking brick, men always assume they're faster and stronger than i am. you wouldn't like what happens when they are incorrect. once while drunk at a guy's house i won a held-plank challenge by a solid minute. the party was over after that - he became exceedingly violent.

what i mean is that you can be perfect, and they still think you're ... lacking, somehow. i hope you understand i'm trying to express a neutral statement when i say: taylor swift was the possibly the most patriarchy-palatable, straight-down-the-line woman we could churn out. she is white, conventionally attractive, usually pretty mild in personality. say what you will about her (and you should, she's a billionaire, she can handle it), but a few things seem to be true about her: 1. she can write a damn catchy song, and 2. the eras tour truly was a massive commercial success and was also genuinely an impressive feat of human athleticism and performance.

i don't know if she deserves the title of "woman of the year," i'm not debating that in this post. what i am saying is that she was named Woman of The Year, and then an untalented man got onstage at the golden globes and made fun of her for attending her boyfriend's football games. what i am saying is that this woman altered local economies - and her dating life is still being made into a "harmless" punchline. the camera panned, greedy, over to her downing a full glass of champagne. congratulations taylor! you are woman of the year! but you are a woman. even her.

fuck, man. write better material.

a guy gets onstage at a college graduation and despite the fact like half the crowd is made up of women, he spends a significant proportion of it warning these people - who spent possibly hundreds of thousands of dollars on their education - that they were lied to. that the "real" meaning of femininity is motherhood. that they shouldn't rest on the laurels of that education-they-paid-for but instead throw it away to kneel at a man's heel. imagine that. sweating in your godawful polyester gown (that you also had to pay for!), fresh out of 4 years of pushing yourself ever-harder: and some guy you've never met - who knows nothing about you - he reminds you this "win" is a pyrrhic one at best. you really shouldn't consider yourself that extraordinary. you're still a woman, even after years of study.

god forbid you are not a pretty woman, but if you are pretty, you must be dumb. god forbid you are not ablebodied or white or cis or straight or good at swallowing. you must be beneath a man, or else they are not a man. the equation for masculinity seems to just be: that which is not a woman or womanly (god forbid). anything "feminine" is thereby anathema. to engage in "feminine" things such as therapy, getting a hug from a friend, or crying - it is giving up ones manhood. therefore women need to be put in their place to ensure that masculinity is protected.

this is something i have struggled to explain to terfs - they are not doing the work of feminism, but rather the patriarchy. by asserting that women and men must be (on some secret level) oppositional and in conflict, they also assume that being a woman is akin to being another species. but bigotry does not stem from observational truths or clarity - that is what makes it bigotry. there was nothing in my childhood that made me fundamentally different from my brother. we are treated differently nonetheless. to assert there is some biological drive that enforces my gender role is to assert that women have a gendered role. men do not see women as equal to them not because of biological reality - but instead because the core tenant of the patriarchy is that women aren't full, realized people.

we are told from a very young age to excuse misbehavior as a single man's choice - not all men. it is not all men, just that one guy. all women are gold-digging bitches who belong in the kitchen - but if a man is mean, bigoted, or violent to you, it's just that particular guy, and that means nothing about men-as-a-whole. it is only one guy who got mad when you gently rejected him. it is only one guy who warns her this trophy is heavy, are you sure you can hold it? it is only one guy who smashes her face into the cake. it is only one guy talking into a mic about hating our bodily autonomy.

i have just found that they often wait until the moment we actually seem to be upstaging them. you sit in a meeting where you're presenting your own findings and he says get me a coffee? or you run to the end of the marathon and are about to finish first and he pushes your kids out in front of you. you win the chess game and they make some comment akin to well, you're ugly away. we can be the billionaire and get the dream life and finally fucking do it and yet! still! they have this strange, visceral urge to say well actually, if you think you're so great -

it's not one just one guy. it's one in eight.

[redr0sewrites]

So bc u requested Adam and/or Lute stuff I'd like to request Adam x male!reader? Like literally anything that comes to your mind, idc if it's sfw or nsfw I just crave it °^° (also if you're not comfy with writing male reader that's totally cool too, in that case just ignore this)

I HAVW NO QUALMS AB WRITING MALE READER NONNIE DW!!!! ♥️

🥀Cw: fluff, smut, male!reader, overall adam's usual shenanigans

🥀minors dni with the nsfw portion

sfw:

you can NOT look me in the eyes and tell me adam does not have some form of internalized homophobia, and the minute he starts catching feelings for you i genuinely think he'd have a mini crisis

because of his major fuckboy personality he has a LOT of experience with flirting with women, but literally no experience with flirting with men

adam is still pretty confident however, and would probably approach you first.

i think he'd have to be friends with you to catch feelings for you in the first place, so he's probably around you pretty often

adam is very subconsciously flirty with you, but in a much more genuine way without his usual bravado. he doesn't even realize how soft he acts around you, but others can tell by the way his eyes always follow you and how he seems to orbit around you, or the way he'll purposefully stand as close as possible when he's talking to you. theres also the fact that he's literally always touching you, whether it be an arm around your shoulders or a hand resting on your back, he just needs to be close to you. you attract him like a moth to a flame, even when he's in a crowded room all adam is focused on is getting your attention. even his casual hookups stop as he literally focuses all his time on winning you over, even he doesn't realize how much he likes you (everyone else can tell. theres a betting pool in heaven on when you both will get together and who will confess first, etc)

adam definitely acts like a BUFFOON around you, deep down he doesn't think someone like you would want to be with him and overcompensates by bragging constantly about all the woman he's liked in a slightly pathetic attempt to flirt with you and literally CONSTANTLY trying to get your attention. think of his usual flaunting attitude and then turn up the dial by 100%. he wants to be on your mind 24/7 the same way your on his mind all the time

meanwhile ur lowkey heartbroken, bc you think adam is straight and yet you can't get rid of your stupid ass crush on his stupid face!!!! it's honestly especially irritating because he'll flirt with you and call you so many petnames and nicknames and will always be touching you, so you think you have a chance, then all of a sudden he's talking about some girl he banged and you just feel a bit led on

its very amusing for lute to watch the both of you dance around eachother and your feelings, when you both so clearly like eachother but are too scared to do anything about it

honestly i think you'd both end up confessing to eachother in the middle of an argument, maybe your pissed at adam for bragging about the "super hot girl he banged last night" (she isn't real and he spent the entire night thinking about you) and he's pissed off that your getting mad at him instead of being impressed or falling in love with him

definitely one of those dramatic "because i LOVE you, okay?!" confessions i am cringe but i am free and adam just kinda stares at you for a hot minute

adam would literally be like "wait... YOU like ME???? i thought you HATED me????? IM the one who likes YOU!" in usual adam fashion, and you would literally be like -_-"YOU LIKED ME THIS WHOLE TIME??? WHY DIDNT U SAY ANYTHING????" his dumbass would literally be like "I WAS TRYING TO??????" and all of this useless dialogue would literally just end in the two of you admitting your true feelings (much to lute's amusement who was recording the entire thing bc she NEEDS to win that bet)

once you both are officially together? prepare for adam to be the clingiest mf alive (in a cute way tho). he waited so long to be with you and literally became solely devoted to you for a WHILE before winning you over and it's probably been a hot minute since he's genuinely dated someone. sure, he's had hookups, but real, soulful relationships aren't common with him.

adam is ridiculously loyal to you, definitely one of those people who will be like "i have a bf 🙄" when someone random texts them, even if that person wasn't even interested in them romantically

LOVESSS flaunting you!! adam will bring you to every event he attends, he loves bragging about you and showing you off to all of heaven

if anyone ever gave you any shit about your relationship adam would literally drop kick them, he's very defensive about your guys' relationship and wants everyone to know that he loves you.

adam doesn't know shit about labels or sexuality so you probably have to teach him some things, i honestly think he'd be pansexual or just queer/unlabeled (i am totallyyy nooot projecting)

nsfw:

adam has been alive a long time and thought he tried everything sex related under the sun, but being with a guy opened a whole new world of possibilities

adam had explored with anal a bit before, but never with a partner. only in the late hours of the night when jerking off just wasn't enough, and he found himself with a strange temptation, his hands creeping lower and lower until he finally began to thrust his fingers in and out of his aching hole, tears welling in his eyes from a mix of humiliation and pure pleasure. yet, when he admitted to having tried fingering himself before, he also admitted something else- he had never managed to make himself cum, and had always gotten too embarrassed to push himself over the edge

he is a switch FIGHT ME. the first time your both intimate, adam absolutely talks so much shit about topping yet starts whining the second he begins fucking your tight cavern. this leads to you taking control and fucking him senseless, and adam is shocked at how much he enjoys it

he takes dick like a champ, he's a bratty sub at first but once you praise or degrade him, he's melting like putty in your hands

adam is sooo loud, he's a shameless moaner and everyone within a mile radius can hear his screams

you have to teach him how to give head, and he is surprisingly a very fast learner. adam lowkey gets off on how humbling it is to be below you, and he's also the type to get off on his partner's pleasure.

adam definitely has some sort of breeding kink, and when he's fucked dumb and so, so needy, he'll beg you to cum inside, whining about fucking a baby into him and babbling pure nonsense

even though it is quite literally impossible for either of you to get pregnant, he loves that kind of dirty talk. adam will pretend to be embarrassed about it but the thought of you breeding him or him breeding you is genuinely such a turn on for him

yall literally never use a condom im sorry 💀

adam would enjoy topping as well, i def think he enjoys fucking you and he loves fucking you senseless with pleasure

the first time he tops adam goes slow, he wants to learn more than anything and becomes incredibly skilled at reaching that sweet spot inside of you

adam is the first man, the original dick, and he definitely knows how to use it. he's such a fast learner when it comes to sex-related things, and memorizes everything about you and your body. he wants to know what makes you tick, and everything that pleases you or turns you on

adam is a pretty big guy and he can easily maneuver you into any position you want, he really likes hitting it from the back and loves fucking you from behind. he'd definitely pull your hair, forcing your head back so he could whisper absolute filth in your ear

i really really enjoyed writing this urgrhrgregregeh i love me some adam- im an afab person but im genderqueer/unlabeled and sometimes feel more masculine or more feminine, snd this was very fun to write bc i usually don't get requests for male reader or more masculine reader so yea i really really enjoyed this!!! also happy easter to anyone else who celebrates lmao i can't believe yall r getting smut from me on easter 💀

[queenshelby]

Chemical Reactions (P. 1)

Pairing: Cillian Murphy as J Robert Oppenheimer x Student Reader

Warning: Smut in later parts, Age-Gap, Infidelity 

Words: 1,867

Note: The fic is spoiler free and fantasy. 

It was just before Christmas when you took up a scholarship at Berkley and, since you were young woman at the tender age of twenty-two, you still could not believe your luck.

You got in to one of the most sought-after courses in the US when it came to quantum physics, which was a field so new and progressive that, to many, its attributes appeared to be rather absurd whereas, to you, it was a way of understanding the world.

The class you had applied for was that of J Robert Oppenheimer who was a well-known physicist and whilst you had only ever read about his works in the academic papers at Harvard, you were eager to finally meet the man whose work impressed you so much.

Being female in the field of physics, however, came with a price. Your skills had often been disregarded because of your gender and being excluded from experiments was not unusual either. As such, you were cautious and kept your obvious excitement at bay as, no doubt, criticism was a concept that your fellow students knew just too well and, in your mind, it was always easy for others to criticise those who they did not yet know, i.e., the new and possibly only female student in their class.

***

On your first day, when you arrived to the impressive building, you realised that you were over twenty minutes early and this, too, was not surprising.

You were punctual most of the time and when you weaved your way through the building, you were surprised by how little time it took for you to find the lecture room, which, thankfully, was unlocked and had a few other students already inside.

You selected a seat one row from the front, in a spot that, to most professors, said "I am eager to learn” which you hoped was beneficial seeing that, at least for now, you were the only woman in the room.

“Would you be accepted by your peers?” you pondered, but your thoughts were quickly interrupted when, who you assumed to be your professor, entered the room.

He was a frail but attractive looking man, wearing a grey suit that was matched by a white shirt and a dark coloured tie. He was smoking cigarette and put his dark brown leather satchel on the table in front of him, rifling haphazardly through the mess of papers inside.

Against your will, you felt a displeased look settle onto your face. Is the professor's class going to be as disorganised as his abyss of a bag, you wondered? Were those other students' assignments in there, begging to be lost?

You smirked for a minute at the intrusion of your very own thoughts about Dr Oppenheimer before you instinctively pulled your cheek in between your teeth which just when more students began to fly in to the room.

“Oh look, someone must have gotten lost” one of them was quick to say with a grin as he had spotted you and your neatly laid out stationary.

“The biology classes are conducted down the hall, in the third room to the left” was what another one said, causing you to rise from your seat in order to speak up against this nonsense just before the professor himself did it for you.

“And what makes you presume that she is in the wrong room, Mr Handley?” Dr Oppenheimer asked almost sternly and his reaction most certainly surprised you as, until now, you did not think that he had even noticed you.

“She is a woman, sir” the man stammered somewhat reluctantly, causing the professor to furrow his eyebrows.

“And you presume that this prestigious establishment seeks to exclude women from studying in the field of physics?” Dr Oppenheimer then asked, causing you to grin silently. “That seems rather absurd, wouldn’t you agree?” he then went on to add, causing the young man to nod.

“Of course... I mean, of course not” the student stammered just before Dr Oppenheimer began to call roll which is something you did not even notice as you were too transfixed on his demure and the way he presented himself until, eventually, your hand shot up at the sound of your full name.

“Present” you said, feeling a blush coming to your cheeks as the class and Dr Oppenheimer looked at you, the latter's blue eyes lingering on you a bit longer than the others.

You forced yourself to hold his gaze, not sure of the intention behind it and then, suddenly, he spoke:

"Miss Y/LN, now tell us, what have they been up to at Harvard these days? This is where you have transferred from, correct?” the professor then asked just as his look towards you intensified even more. His deep blue eyes were seeing right through you and yet you managed to answer him confidently.

“Not much in so far as the physics department is concerned, Dr Oppenheimer. In the last year we experimented with nuclear fission, but I assume that, considering the current political climate, so has everyone else. We then looked at metaphysics, stars, the universe…” you explained before sharing some of your findings and conclusions which impressed not only Dr Oppenheimer but also some of the other students.

When listening to you talk, it became obvious to him that you were rather intelligent even at such a young age and your interest in science was one of great significance.

“None of this is new” one of the students then said nonetheless after you finished your explanations and outlined your conclusions, to which you responded rather sharply yourself.

“I didn’t claim that it was. I simply answered Dr Oppenheimer’s question” you pointed out and the professor was quick to take your side again.

“And I appreciate your thorough explanation Miss Y/LN. It helped me understand where you are at when it comes to the presumed knowledge for my class” Dr Oppenheimer went on to say and you knew that, whatever the true reasons were behind his questions, his intent was not as innocent as he made it out to be. He wanted to know whether the physics department in Harvard knew more than the physics department at Berkley which, luckily for him, was not the case.  

The entire profession was well aware of the ‘program’ about to implemented by the US government and several physicists and educational departments began to protect their research with more earnest for a chance to cash in on the war.

But, Dr Oppenheimer did not appear to be one of those reserved physicists who were just in it for themselves. To the contrary, he really cared about making a difference and his research to date was well known within in the industry. He did not mind sharing his findings even if they were inconclusive and you have heard many stories about how he enjoyed working in the faculty as part of a group rather than on his own.

He was a leader but also a team player and, as such, when he wrapped up his questions for the day and announced the research project for the coming days, every student around him broke out into appreciative chatter as you remained in your seat, slightly dumbfounded, as the students were broken up into four groups.

---

“You worked in experimental before, have you not?” Dr Oppenheimer asked as, after a little while, he approached you and the group to which he had assigned you.

“I am pleased to know that you have read my file Dr Oppenheimer” you smiled after giving him a nod, which too is when you realised just how handsome he truly was. He must have been in his late thirties and seeing a wedding ring on this man’s finger came as a disappointment to you.

“I have read all of my students’ files” Dr Oppenheimer assured you just as you stood awkwardly at your table for a moment, debating whether or not to take the courage to ask him the millions of questions you had for him already until, suddenly, he prompted you to do exactly that.

"Did you have a question for me?" Dr Oppenheimer asked innocently as if he could have read your mind.

“Uhm…” you paused while cursing yourself already for having started your sentence with that godforsaken 'uhm' which, in your opinion, made you sound like an idiot.

"Yes, actually. I was wondering if, with this formula, you have considered the possibility…” you began to question, seeing how he had arrived at the calculations already presented to you and, just as you spoke with such great determination, you trailed off a bit as his gaze intensified.

“Quite frankly, you lost me there, at the end of your calculations but that is not to say that you are wrong” Dr Oppenheimer said almost politely as you looked at him somewhat flustered, causing your fellow students to chuckle and whisper behind your back.

“I must have lost my own train of thought just then. I am sorry sir” you said with blushing red cheeks as all of your confidence flew out of the window and you suddenly became aware of the way he was standing, with his hands against his hips, and the way he looked all together.

“Don’t be sorry Miss Y/LN. In fact, I am interested in exploring that idea of yours further, perhaps even after today’s lessons if you have time” Dr Oppenheimer then said as he adjusted the way he stood and smiled.

“That would be my pleasure, sir” you responded as you watched him spread his arms out on the table in front of you, far past shoulder width. He was leaning on his hands, causing the veins on his forearms to bulge slightly, which were exposed by the rolled-up sleeves of his white button-down shirt. He had his head tilted down a bit to look at you with those deep blue eyes until, eventually, he snapped out of his very own and somewhat intrusive thoughts which were thoughts you knew had nothing to do with quantum mechanics whatsoever.  

Dr Oppenheimer then licked his lips lightly before speaking again, distracting you from the first few syllables of his sentence.

"Good, then please come and see when you finish for the day, Miss Y/LN. I will be right here, trying to figure out what you were on about” Dr Oppenheimer then said just as the bell began to ring and the students started to pack up their bags, seeing that most of them had experimental workshops to attend to in the afternoon which, of course, included you. You too had a workshop, which was one you did not look forward to.

“Yes doctor. I will see you this afternoon” you told him with a reluctant smile as you pulled your lab coat closer to your chest and forced your face to remain neutral, even as you felt the heat burning up your neck. You then gave him a curt "thank you" before lifting your chin and turning to leave.

To be continued…

Please comment and engage. I love getting comments and predictions pretty please!

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[akilahia]

Thinking about IHNMAIMS in pretty much all of its forms.

Specifically Ted and Ellen. Obviously in the Game their relationship is very different from the short story/comic/radio drama, with Ted being in love with Ellen(although it’s evident it’s because she is the only woman left alive). In the game he shows devotion to her, he is willing to push past his usual methods of flirtation and find other ways to get what he needs.

But in the other adaptions his feelings towards Ellen are mixed. I think his unique backstory with being so dependent on women to live a happier and more lavish life style, significantly effect how he views Ellen beyond AM’s tampering

Throughout the short story Ted constantly thinks ill of Ellen. Even though prior to being placed in this hell, she had only had sex twice before. But she is the last woman alive on earth. The video game(while following a different plot line(still one that is extremely tragic and literally made me cry)) expresses that even before Ellen’s assualr she had little to no interest in sex. She would never have had sex with the four men if it weren’t for

1. AM

2. Being the Last women alive

3. AM’s deliberate tampering

In a world where characters like Benny have been so permanently physically marked as a form of torture by AM, something like sex, is not as extreme in comparison(at least from Ted’s perspective). However to be the last woman alive, with minimal interest in sex, to be tampered with in such a way, is such a horrific form of torture.

I’m going to shift a way from this for a second to talk about Ted’s backstory for the video game. I understand that the videogame makes changes in terms of backstory for some of the characters(like Benny), so we can’t claim Ted’s backstory for the game is even remotely close to whatever it might have been for the short story. However, I still think can provide interesting context to his behavior towards Ellen.

Starting off, he really isn’t the cool rich guy that he played himself off to be when life was still normal. He never came from money, he was poor and he was forced to work and couldn’t go to school. However he was good looking which is resulted in older woman being attracted to him. And when he was NINETEEN, one older woman gave him her husband’s money and offered him the chance to travel and live in luxury.

Now this probably isn’t important, or was even taken into consideration by the game makers, but I was curious as to what the possible age gap between this older woman and Ted could be. The were together for 5 years, then she died

She died specifically of an aneurysm, which according to Google typically happens between the ages of 30 to 60. There is all this stuff with the Cold War and ww3 and I was going to try to do all this math with it but it’s too late for that and not relevant to the point I’m trying to make. But I’m just going to do some simple mental math and estimate that it might have been late 60’s or early 70’s when the older woman and Ted first got into a relationship. As I’m assuming everything went to shit in 1995 since that’s when the game came out, and 25 years had passed after he met the woman. Also this makes sense as Ted’s grandfather sold the farm due to the Great Depression, since most people married and had kids young, I’m going to be generous and say grandpa was 30 in 1929, and Ted’s mother or father was 9, then 10-12 years later Ted was born. Then 19 years later it would be about the 60’s or 70’s.

I am going to presume that the older woman had been married to her husband for at least 15 years. So it might have been 50’s at the earliest possibility. And the average age people married at then was when they were in their 20’s. So when she met Ted she was AT THE EARLIEST 35. Making her at least 16 years older than Ted when the first got together. But also worth noting that they do specifically mention older. So if we look on the higher side of the typical ages for aneurisms she could have been 55 when they first met(as the 5 years would pass making her 60) so she could have been 36 years older than him.

This seriously isn’t relevant to the actual point I’m trying to make with Ellen and Ted but I got sucked in. I guess I just wanted to highlight that Ted did not have the power in this relationship, he was young and poor, while she was old and rich, and I can imagine how that kind of relationship would impact him.

The next thing I want to note is the use of the word ‘lover’.

Though it can be used in a strictly romantic non intimate sense, I think it is used in the sexual way here.

Especially with the provided context of two different definitions of the word ‘lover’ both highlighting it’s connotations with sexual relationships

Furthermore, Ted’s relationship with the older woman is essentially just a sugar baby relationship. She is letting him experience things he never could have without her money. She teaches him how to act as a socialite and gets him used to the high life.

In connection to the sexual elements above, there was a video I wanted to link here but I can’t find it anywhere anymore. It was a YouTube video with a bunch of sugar babies discussing their experiences. And one woman confides that you really won’t make much money if you are in a platonic or non intimate romantic relationship with your sugar parent. If you want to make money and live richly, you have to preform sexual favors.

Now it’s hard to say if this was the only relationship with an older woman that Ted had been in. But regardless of whether it was one woman or a billion, using his body in order to get something that he wants has become an important asset to Ted; As seen in the castle with the maid and the witch. His love for Ellen(in the video game) helps him break past this fatal flaw of his, despite AM’s obvious temptations to make him fail.

Even if this stuff was in anyone’s minds when they wrote Ted’s backstory but I think it’s extremely important to note, especially as we return to my main point.

As stated before, Ted views Ellen negatively due to her promiscuity, despite the desire(felt really gross typing this word in this context) being placed in her as a form of torture by AM. She also is a woman, and Ted’s life has been spent around using and being used by women, so definitely lots of conflicting stuff there. Additionally Ted’s experiences with sexual relations are shown to be based in being transactional.

When he agrees with Ellen to go to the caves to get the food, she rewards him by being intimate with him to show her gratitude. Ted sees it as her ‘using him.’ (From the Radio Drama, I was going to post the clip but I could only post one video in a tumblr post apparently)

In the comic, after this encounter he questions her motivations. What she got out of it, once again thinking transactionally. But her response

“Does there have to be a reason”

Really gets to me. Especially after looking at all this intertextual context. Thinking about video game Ted’s backstory with book Ted’s thoughts and behaviors, he is shown to always think there is some kind of catch. No one is doing something without getting something in return, especially if that thing is kindness.

Ted is so intensely paranoid(as seen in all versions). I think by pairing up the backstory for the game with the short story/comic/radio drama it’s evident to see how heavily affected he is by it.

He thinks he has been tormented less by AM, making him paranoid of the others, contributing towards his behavior towards Ellen. Yet despite everything from the past and all of AM’s tampering, he still finds comfort with Ellen. Her unfaltering kindness manages to reach him even when he dismisses it as a farce. She doesn’t hate him or the others for how they’ve treated her, she still wants to help them. He still cares for her and the others. But he is filled with so much fear. He even apologizes to her.

I feel like at that point in the Radio drama marks a shift. Ted has made a realization about AM and it’s a lot for him, but Ellen is there for him. It’s a genuinely sincere act of kindness from her where she doesn’t ask or expect anything in return. They have some kind of connection. Once again blending the different versions, I think that this moment between them comes together in the end when they kill the other victims together. They don’t speak to each other, they just do it quickly and he kills her. And here he doesn’t refer to her by any degrading names. In the comic he holds her. Like how in the radio drama she held him.

Overall I just wanted to point out how well all these versions really mix to provide so much more behind each character. The backstories for the video game allow the reader to understand book Ted’s actions and relationships from a new angle.

The is was super duper major mess of a ramble. It’s now 3 am and I have a migraine, so I’m done for tonight. I might clean this up another time or make another post about Video game Ted with context to his backstory since I didn’t include the events from the video game in here.

Once again these are just my thoughts and beliefs on how I think the video game backstory for Ted provides interesting context for Book Ted. I know that both stories play out differently and both Ted’s act differently so please don’t get angry if you disagree with the message of stuff I said

mini sequel post about video game Ted

[aphroditesmoon]

children of the empire

king!jacaerys valeryon x reader

summary: the tale of the king and the slave.

warnings: slave!reader, infidelity, hurt/comfort, angst, childbirth, grief, death, inspired by paul and chani from dune book series.

A/N: just jace and reader being wholly devoted to eachother

wc: 1.4k

----

HE KNEW THE two of you were destined to be together from the moment he laid his eyes on you. After the coronation held for him as King, multiple houses that had changed the course of their loyalty at the last minute had begun to seek the now young King Jacaerys’ favor. And so began the parade of gifts from ornaments, jewels and women were presented. Exotic slaves from colonized lands were brought forth to the king. He had sat on the throne as if it was made just for him. The throne his mother had not been given the privilege to sit on for even a whole year. 

By his side, was his once betrothed and now Queen Baela. Their union was celebrated the way their parents would have wanted, and the two tried their hardest to uphold all the traditions and rulings to make worth of the sacrifices and bloodshed in the name of Rhaenyra Targaryen.  

In everyone’s eyes, the pair was unstoppable, a united front with grudging respect for the other. A pair not only blessed with deserving power, but also with love. 

But no one knew what really lied behind closed doors. The King Jacaerys and Queen Baela Targaryen had not loved one another. They might’ve liked each other in a way, back then. But the war and deaths have changed them both forever. They could not find any semblance of romantic attraction or comfort in the other. They had mourned their families in such a similar way, yet somehow still jarringly different. To find intimacy with the other was to face unspoken grief. 

Jacaerys had thought that the loveless marriage would be the end of him ever experiencing a pure, tender bond with anyone. But he had seen you in a line of tired looking, plain and pretty girls, and he had sworn he’d seen you in a dream before.  

If his mother was alive, she would be cursing him off his head. In fact, sometimes he hears her too. Yelling, and calling him a failure of a son, as he’s holding your thighs open, plunging himself deeper inside of you. An affair had by kings wasn’t uncommon, but he wondered how many of them were of love and not lust. He knew he would love you like his mother loved his father. But no matter how much of him is his mother’s son, he would not let you suffer the same end as his father. 

He learned quickly that you weren’t as docile as you looked. Ask the wrong question and you’ll snap back. And yet, you were also not as hostile as you make yourself to be. You scold him like no one dares to do to the King, and you call him names on days he’s being particularly irritating, receiving a rising reaction from his shocked and baffled advisor and guards. But he knew that you were harmless. And you knew that a man like him can take a few jabs. And as much as the insults keep on coming, you advise him like no one does either.  

You run your fingers through his hair like you’d give up everything you have to be able to touch him. And he looks up to your standing figure through his mussed-up hair as he kneels down with his arms circling your waist, like no one could ever look to even the greatest of kings. 

“You will carry my children.” He had once told you.

The late-night silence where only the wind was able to speak louder than either of you, making anything he was saying sound possible. “Your queen will hold a knife to my throat.” You responded, feeling him pull you closer to his chest as he rests his chin on top of your head. “I would not let any other woman be the mother to my children except you.”  

You let out a hoarse laugh that sounded almost too cynical to his liking. “I am not your woman, even if I am your property. Any child you have with me is a child destined for a life of suffering.” Had he not been so tired, he would have presented a stronger case after seeing you argue with much more fire even in such an hour. But instead, he only shook his head hard enough for you to feel his disagreement. “You are not my property.” You hummed with your ear to his heart. “I would be yours if you’ll have me, and I’d let you rob me naked if that be your heart’s desire.” You let out a scoff you always do when you’re finding him ridiculous and drunk. Only soft kings dare to dream, a reminder you bring up constantly to him. All because you knew what usually happens to those kinds of rulers, and even if you wouldn’t say it out loud, you cared for him too much to see him resigned to such a fate.  

Three months later, you were with child. Brimmed with joy, Jacaerys had vowed to legalize the babe as soon as it comes out. And even with his queen’s relentless challenging to his title and responsibility, he refuses to send you away. He asks her forgiveness for the disrespect the child’s birth would be to her, but his mind was set.  

An illegitimate royal child was not unheard of, and Jacaerys’ fortunate case of being a man helps lessen the cacophony of riots and disagreement within the council. But when it had been confirmed that the child would be legalized and appointed as his heir. How can a scion of the Targaryen family be a bastard made by bastards.  

And yet with every voice raised against him, his assurance only becomes stronger. Every drink you take and every meal you eat will be tested first for poison. And every move you make would be supervised and followed by personal guards that were starting to make you regret being with him.  6 months into the pregnancy, you had relented into staying in your chambers, his overprotectiveness had become more obvious. Not even the Queen was granted to visit you, in fear of bad intentions.  

His actions had hurt Baela, for she expected him to know better what kind of person she is in terms of morality.  

When your water finally broke, he was 20 minutes late. When a guard had run to him in the throne room to announce the birth, he didn’t need to be told twice to get himself off the iron throne, running to you as fast as he could. You had given birth to a set of twins. A girl, and a boy. He had made it to you in the last few seconds before you let out your final breath. You had whispered his name as he squeezes your hand in a fist while apologizing profusely. “I couldn’t have belonged to anyone else, even if I wanted to.” He had cried by your side. You responded with a confession you’ve never uttered aloud, though both of you already knew what it was. You had breathed out so quietly, words only meant for his ears, “I love you.” The lights in his eyes died out the second you were announced deceased.  

He sat by your cold body for hours before he could be convinced to let his grip on your dead arms off. He held both of his babes for the first and last time in his arms that day before spending the next 2 days locked and isolated in his chambers. Rhaenyra and Lucerys Targaryen. A storm brewed in the sky of Kings Landing. Wild winds and lightning as devastating as his own heart. The people stayed inside as the weather rips off wooden houses and floods the streets in every corner that is 

Baela had tried speaking to him, as gentle as she could, reminding him of his children. But he was non-verbal. And so, she gave up.  

On the third day, Rhaena Targaryen had rushed to her Queen sister, screaming in pure terror as she held up a folded and opened envelope of a letter. The doors to the King’s chambers were slammed open, only to find the place empty. The King hadleft. He had exited the castle to the storms.  

And in his letter contained his want for his wife to rule in his stead until his daughter Rhaenyra reaches the age of 10 and 8, old enough to be wed to her brother, and then after, she’d take her rightful place as Queen.

A legitimate claim to the throne.  

The only other thing written besides his will, was a sentence among the lines, ‘Only a soft king dares to dream. And I am as weak and soft as it can be.’ 

[asshole-rebel-psycho]

The older I get the more I realize these things about dating.

I have been trying to have deep connections and stimulating conversations for some time.

This doesn't seem to work. Especially on dating apps for I guess obvious reasons.

But as an observant, shy, lonely and somewhat intelligent person ( who happens to be gay) I have unfortunately never found love or relationships myself.. I have only seen it through other people

It's pretty apparent that dating is for simple people. I don't mean this in an arrogant way but a majority of individuals seem to not take the question asking part of dating seriously. Idk if this is due to them not being attracted, busy, simple minded or a more narcissistic culture but it is apparent to me that the closer these people are to my location, the less they are willing to learn more about me.

I wonder why that is? 🤔 I've had plenty of engaging online, non dating app conversations with people all over the world.

So part of me thinks that this is due to our new emotionless, soulless culture. Because this problem only exists when I engage with potential matches that can turn into reality.

The need for connection is still there. Fear is holding us back.

Why are people so afraid of reality? What are they running from? Themselves? Other people? Is the world in such a bad place right now that we feel like if we make a connection we know it will probably end up broken like the society we live in? 💔

The more I observe dating and other people's love lives the more it is apparent to me that deep, intellectual, stimulating conversations are not a part of the game AT ALL.

( take it as a grain of salt but from my observations dating goes like this)

One, attraction is the 1# thing! Because if you don't have it there is no fuel to get anything going. The car won't even get out of the lot. Especially off apps.

Secondly, the man usually takes action by getting the girl on the date as fast as possible..he has to woo her by showing her a fun, spontaneous, adventurous, humorous, and flirtatious time.

It is usually filled with banter, funny nostalgic stories, flirting and none of that would even matter if the two ( especially the man who usually carries the convo) was not attracted.

You can seriously make anything work with mutual sexual attraction. I've seen two plain and boring people talk for hours about nothing but because they had those saucer eyes for eachother it just worked! They definitely don't talk about work or deep concepts.

So the man drains his ( or if hes in his 20s) his daddy's resources on the girl to have a "fun" time..meanwhile his sexual motivation is keeping it going because she obviously has many other options.

The girl then looks pretty and vets if he is worthy for a LTR.

If so, she gets brought into this new, advantageous, silly, successful man's life and uses him as a tool to get away from her boring and domesticated life. She uses him for fun, community, hobbies and eventually family.

She uses his resources as a way to post on tiktok, fb and ig to show off to all of her friends " look at the amazing, good looking and successful guy I am able to get" mostly to show status as a woman and to make her friends jealous..because they were mean to her in the past.

None of her *connection* to her man has pretty much anything to do with conversation. ( sounds harsh I know but hear me out)

If you doubt this why do men and women immediately separate at Christmas parties and work events?

Have you ever observed a straight guy talking to a straight girl before? At any age?

It's usually a girl talking with her friends about things that doesn't interest him and his eyes roll over astrology and the girl eye rolling about video games or sports banter. Exc...

It's pretty obvious how for 95% of the population..male and female worlds have NOTHING to do with eachother. And want NOTHING to do with eachother except for what each gender lacks...

Emotional support from the woman and financial stability from the man. What binds them is sex and what keeps them together is family.

This is why my nerdy lesbian ass has such a hard time with dating. Lol

In the typical female way I am relying too much on talking, not much action. And in a very unfair lesbian way I can't seem to find my opposite.

I am trying to find an intellectual match when I should just be finding my feminine opposite. I'm treating dating like lunch dates with friends, Like men discussing politics on the Titanic while smoking cigars.

Unless I want to talk to a mirror long conversation isn't the way to go.

Because it never was to begin with. This is the code I finally cracked. Lol 😆

I'll leave the cerebral banter and philosophical insights to the lonely, individualistic writer side of me..the side of many great minds in history...But even a great writer will drop his work like a hot potato as soon as he finds a woman he is undeniably in love with. 🥰

My point is to find my opposite not my reflection. And my opposite might surprise me with what they can give or know...even if it's not deep or extremely interesting to me. This goes for any gender. Love doesn't work that way.

[yandere-writer-momo]

Rent-A-Girlfriend

Part 4: Baki Hanma/ Jack Hanma (2)

Yandere Various Baki x Afab reader

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

Part 5

………………………………………

So sorry that I am only doing Jack, Kaoru, Katsumi, and Baki. But you guys are getting, you guessed it! Jun Guevara!

All characters are aged up FYI! They are in their 20s.

……………………………………..

(Your name) laid on her stomach on her bed. A fluffy white towel wrapped around her head while she kicked her feet and giggled. Katsumi was such a cutie. It’s been awhile since she was genuinely interested in a man…

Momo sat up and stretched her arms above her head with a yawn. She needed to start getting around for this date with Jack. She had almost forgotten about the blonde since she’s been so into Katsumi.

But she had graciously accepted Jack’s date before talking to Katsumi… maybe she should tell the karateka about her next three jobs? No… that wouldn’t be right to do. It’s not like they were official or had a title yet. Necessarily she was a single woman on a rental dating site still.

(Your name) got around for the date. She decided to wear a patterned blouse and jeans. Her app said Jack had set up a date at a cafe so there was no need for a dress today.

(Your name) styled her hair and made her way to the train station unaware of the black limousine sitting outside of her apartment complex. A certain yakuza watching her leave in interest.

“Follow her.” Kaoru told Kizaki who sighed. It was a bit unusual for someone of Kaoru’s caliber to be so interested in a woman like this before… perhaps he’s just going through a phase right now?

Kaoru lit a cigar and took a long drag. Kizaki wasn’t able to find much on her at all. Just a name, adress, and a clean record. She had no social media… she had to be hiding something and he was going to figure it out.

“Just who are you, (your name)?” Kaoru muttered to himself.

.

.

.

(Your name) smiled when she saw Jack was patiently waiting for her at the cozy little cafe. Poor guy looked so out of place with his large body crammed at such a small table. From the way he was sitting, he must have been waiting for awhile. Was he excited to see her? How endearing.

Now that she thought of it, how did he find clothes that even fit him? Did he have a personal tailor? She didn’t think it was humanly possible for someone to be as massive as him.

(Your name) shook her head. She wasn’t going to question the logic of Jack’s existence. She was here to get paid and then go home.

(Your name) opened the door and smiled at Jack. The blonde perking up a bit when she walked in just like a German shepherd… that was a little mean to think that. She shouldn’t compare the man to a big ‘scary’ dog.

“Hello, darling.” (Your name) approached him and pressed her lips to his cheek. The blonde blushing at the touch. “Were you waiting long?”

“No…” (Your name) tried not to giggle at how awkward Jack was. It was endearing that a man as large as him had no experience with women. A shame as well. Man was probably well endowed- dirty thought! Shake your head clear of those dirty thoughts, (your name).

Jack noticed her blush and felt his heart flutter. Perhaps she had an inkling of his attraction to her? Or that he was still a virgin… He wasn’t too obvious… was he?

(Your name) sat in front of Jack. Her (eye color) eyes scanning the menu in interest. She didn’t think he would pick such a tasteful cafe with paninis. Jack didn’t look like the kind of guy who would eat a panini.

“Have you been here before?” Momo asks him with a smile.

“… no.” Jack admitted. Should he admit he googled popular date ideas? Would she think less of him?

“I think you picked a good spot. It’s been awhile since I’ve had a panini.” (Your name) smiled at him. He googled this spot just to take her out on a date… that is so cute. “You’re surprisingly thoughtful.”

Jack hummed. He was only able to rent her for a few hours today so he was going to make the most of it. He wished he could spend more time with her… wait. What was he thinking? They just met.

“I’m trying.” Jack mutters softly. “I don’t have much experience with dating…”

(Your name) took two of his thick fingers in her hand and gave them a reassuring squeeze.

“That’s what I’m here for…” She gave him a bright smile, causing his knees to go weak and his palms to sweat. Jack averted his gaze, his heart drumming rapidly in his chest. “You’re doing well so far.”

Jack wasn’t used to praise… but he liked it. Jack enjoyed being praised like this. It made him feel special.

The two shared light banter and conversation. (Your name) was happy that the blonde was opening up to her more and more. He looked more approachable when he relaxed. Not to mention how hilarious it was to watch him try to eat a piping hot panini in one bite. Jack was surprisingly fun to spend time with… but perhaps it was because she thought of him to be similar to a dog?

The way he had his utmost attention on her and anything she did was interesting to her. She hasn’t had a man look at her like she was a god in a long time…

Sadly, she only had five minutes left with him…

“Our time is almost up…” (your name) softly whispered, Jack furrowing his brow. He hadn’t realized how much time had passed.

(Your name) tried not to chuckle at how disappointed he looked. It was nice to see him expressing his emotions a bit better. It made the monstrous man more human in her eyes.

Jack stood up and helped her out of her chair. The two walking side by side out of the cafe together. His entire hand engulfed hers, the calloused skin from tears of fighting felt rough against the soft skin of her hands.

“I had a great time today, Jack.” (Your name) smiled warmly at the giant man. She was being genuine. Jack was comfortable to be around, she felt incredibly safe with him.

Jack stopped walking, his body bending down with a snap. (Your name)’s eyes wide in shock when she felt slightly chapped lips briefly touch her cheek. It was quick and fleeting, like a butterfly landing on a flower. But it wasn’t opposed.

“I wanted to do that all day…” Jack muttered under his breath. The blonde turning his head to try to hide his red cheeks. That was so cute… how could he be cute?

(Your name) touched the spot his lips touched before smiling at him. “Well… I enjoyed it. Didn’t think you’d be the sweet type.”

(Your name) takes his massive hand up to her lips and presses a soft kiss to his scarred knuckles. Jack shivered in response, his breathing rapid. He felt like he was going to fall over and die from how fast his heart beat in his chest.

“Thank you for today, Jack. Have a good rest of your day today, Jack.” (Your name) waved good bye to Jack. The blonde biting his lip before speaking again.

“I want to try to see you again soon…” Jack said, the giant man shoving his hands in his pockets to try to stop himself from saying anything embarrassing. “Have a good day, (your name).”

Jack then turned on his heel to walk off but not before noticing a black limo across the street. Jack narrowing his brown eyes before shaking his head.

There was no way someone would be following (your name) around, right? She couldn’t possibly have gotten herself tangled in anything dangerous…

Jack narrowed his gaze when he saw a flash of Hanayama’s face from the limousine’s window when it drove past him. Just what was that yakuza up to now?

.

.

.

𝐉𝐚𝐜𝐤 𝐠𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐚 𝟓 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫 𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠! 𝐇𝐨𝐨𝐫𝐚𝐲!

𝐃𝐨𝐧’𝐭 𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐠𝐞𝐭 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐝𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐁𝐚𝐤𝐢 𝐇𝐚𝐧𝐦𝐚 𝐭𝐨𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐫𝐨𝐰 𝐚𝐟𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐧𝐨𝐨𝐧!

(Your name) smiled at the pastel pink screen on her phone. Her ratings have been going up as of late so she’s been getting more date requests. Business was booming, baby.

(Your name) then exited the screen to see if she had any missed messages and oh boy there were at least fifteen missed messages from Katsumi. She was barely with Jack for three hours and she missed this many messages? That was insane.

Oh. That made sense. She forgot to tell Katsumi she was on a job.

She quickly shot Katsumi a message and apologized for not getting back to him. Poor guy.

She was amazed at the instant reply.

‘That’s okay! Sorry, I just became a little anxious there. I just get so nervous around pretty girls like you is all. :)’

What a goober. Katsumi was lucky he was so cute because she didn’t particularly like clingy men.

‘I should have told you. That’s on me, haha.’

(Your name) smiled. Katsumi seemed like such a sweet guy… it really made her wonder why he was on the market… oh well. He wouldn’t be for long if things continued to work out between them.

The young woman made her way into the bathroom. Her phone buzzing with a new text message notification.

‘You can never do anything wrong in my eyes. Can we call each other in a bit? I miss your voice.’

The roots were starting to form from this seed, poor girl had no idea what she just planted into her life.

.

.

.

Monday rolled around faster than she thought. She was interested in this Baki character. She wondered how he’d be… she went with her another softer look. Most of the men she wants on dates with seemed to like soft, demure girls and she would pretend to be anyone for some extra pocket cash.

She made her way towards the park, a young man with shoulder length red hair standing out like a sore thumb. He was pretty… surprisingly pretty. Almost like a girl.

The closer she was, the slightly more masculine he became. Baki wasn’t particularly tall but he did have a nice build to him.

Baki was currently lost in his own thoughts. The young man leaning back to sigh. Ever since his breakup with Kozue, he’s been a bit empty. It’s been rough getting back out on the dating field as of late.

Turns out a lot of people don’t want to date an underground fighter of his prestige. His life was too dangerous for love or civilian friends. It was upsetting to him to say the least. He tried dating in his age range but he decided to just hire a girlfriend for the day to test out an older woman.

Baki was hardly given a chance before he’d be ghosted. It’s been the same pattern for the last two years. One or two dates and then silence. It was stressful to him.

(Your name) smiled warmly once Baki turned his head to look at her. His brown eyes wide in shock at the young woman who stood before him. He didn’t think she’d be so pretty…

“Hello. Baki, right?” Oh lord… the way his name rolled off her tongue had him feeling like a teenager again.

“Yes. My name is Baki.” Baki held his hand out to her. “It’s nice to finally meet you.”

[sophswritingthings]

Your mizu stories mean everything to me and I am sending this as just a thought or a request, up to you!

A female reader who has spent her life always being into women, like no doubt she'll EVER be into a man. Now imagine her pure confusion when she comes into contact with Mizu and is attracted to her (because reader assumes she is a man at first). Reader is like going through a crisis because??? A man??? Causing feelings like this?????Somehow someway she finds out Mizu is a woman and is like. "Yeah that makes so much sense why I like you this way"

pairing: mizu x fem!reader

warning(s): swearing, reader thinks mizu is a man (not a warning just putting it here)

a/n: ME??? CUZ LIKE I FIRST WATCHED THE SHOW AND WAS LIKE… OH. THAN I SAW SHE WAS A WOMAN AND I WAS LIKE OHH PERFECT SENSE YES YES

word count: 361 words / 1,993 characters

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

you were staring at him.

staring him down with those piercing eyes; a man. a man had caught your eye!

a man had never caught your eye before; and now, here you were, sitting across from a samurai.

you were confused—how come you’d spent your whole life, only ever finding women attractive, and now you run into this damned samurai—and you don’t believe you’ve ever found anyone more attractive?

“(y/n),” he says in that raspy voice, pushing his orange tinted glasses up his nose, “are you coming or are you just going to sit on your ass all day?”

you snapped out of your thoughts, nodding quickly, “I’m coming.”

“good,” he hissed, narrowing his eyes. he turned on his heel, walking down the cobbled street. you narrowed your eyes—half angered by his coarse tone.

but what you pissed you off more is that you were attracted to that! some guy who was just always salty and most importantly was a guy!

It confused you to hell and back, and you were going to find out exactly what was going on here.

after what you thought was hours of walking, you stopped at an inn. once you had settled inside your room—mizu disappeared down the hallway.

you couldn’t help but peer down the hallway, seeing that the samurai was walking into the bathhouse.

and suddenly your feet were leading you down the very same hallway.

you were blushing even at the thought of possibly seeing something you weren’t meant to.

your hand wrapped around the corner of the door, pushing it back a bit. you saw the samurai, naked and dripping wet.

you pushed the door a bit too hard; the door making a loud screech sound.

he flipped around, holding his sword firmly in his hand.

your eyes widened.

a girl.

mizu was a girl.

and suddenly, everything clicked for you.

“a-ah, sorry, I—“ you stammered, backing away, “sorry.” 

you shut the door quickly, dashing back down the hallway and slamming the door behind you. you pressed yourself against the door, breathing a bit heavy.

so that’s why you liked her that way. she was a girl.

yeah, no surprise there.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

a/n: reader being relived she’s still gay

[jackoshadows]

It's already been mentioned that in general Jon Snow is more attracted to personality rather than appearance and if I had to pinpoint to what those specific character traits are I would say that it's an independent nature, being a rule breaker and general proactiveness in getting things done.

Ygritte embodied what Jon loved about the Freefolk - a freedom of sorts from Westerosi biases, societal rules and laws. His journey with the Freefolk changes his long held opinions of them and parallels his love for Ygritte. Ygritte is honest and open about her desires, values her independence and often times it is Ygritte who defends and protects Jon Snow.

And though he does not know or love Val as much as he does Ygritte, it's their similar independent nature and not being beholden to others that he again finds attractive.

All the same, the wildling princess was not beloved of her gaolers. She scorned them all as "kneelers," and had thrice attempted to escape. When one man-at-arms grew careless in her presence she had snatched his dagger from its sheath and stabbed him in the neck. Another inch to the left and he might have died. Lonely and lovely and lethal, Jon Snow reflected, and I might have had her. Her, and Winterfell, and my lord father's name. - Jon, ADwD

Val stood on the platform as still as if she had been carved of salt. She will not weep nor look away. Jon wondered what Ygritte would have done in her place. The women are the strong ones. - Jon, ADwD

And when she wants to help by bringing Tormund's faction to the Wall, Jon lets her, trusting in her capability to go beyond the Wall alone, on a half blind horse, with no protection.

“My lady, you do not have to do this. The risk—” “—is mine, Lord Snow. And I am no southron lady but a woman of the free folk. I know the forest better than all your black-cloaked rangers. It holds no ghosts for me.” I hope not. Jon was counting on that, trusting that Val could succeed where Black Jack Bulwer and his companions had failed. She need fear no harm from the free folk, he hoped … but both of them knew too well that wildlings were not the only ones waiting in the woods. - Jon, ADwD

Or when she partners with Jon to help him with Selyse Baratheon - a Westerosi Queen that he is wholly unimpressed with and wants gone from the Wall as soon as possible.

“Let me help.” “You have. You brought me Tormund.” “I can do more.” Why not? thought Jon. They are all convinced she is a princess. Val looked the part and rode as if she had been born on horseback. A warrior princess, he decided, not some willowy creature who sits up in a tower, brushing her hair and waiting for some knight to rescue her. - Jon, ADwD

And then there is Alys Karstark and the flirty vibes between Jon and her. There is certainly admiration there for Alys on Jon's behalf. Alys who gets on a horse in the harshest of winter, nearly dying trying to reach the Wall and yet doing so in the belief that the son of Ned Stark will help her. Alys who probably grew up hearing stories and songs of the evil Wildlings who rape and pillage and yet agrees to marry one to protect her own inheritance and rightful claim to house Karstark.

Jon turned to Alys Karstark. “My lady. Are you ready?” “Yes. Oh, yes.” “You’re not scared?” The girl smiled in a way that reminded Jon so much of his little sister that it almost broke his heart. “Let him be scared of me.”The snowflakes were melting on her cheeks, but her hair was wrapped in a swirl of lace that Satin had found somewhere, and the snow had begun to collect there, giving her a frosty crown. Her cheeks were flushed and red, and her eyes sparkled. “Winter’s lady.” Jon squeezed her hand. - Jon, ADwD

We as readers and characters like Jon Snow understand that the Freefolk are just like the other denizens of Westeros - good and bad - and yet there's just so much bigotry against them, especially in the North. So Alys - who has never even met one of the Freefolk - entering into a marriage alliance with the Magnar of Thenns is indeed momentous and extremely brave. It has similarities to Dany's marriage with Hizdahr to sue for peace for her people, to bring about an end to the insurgency by the slavers.

So while Jon can be protective towards the characters he cares about - Arya, Sam, Satin - he also really loves that independent streak in the girls he is attracted towards.

Which is why I am really excited for Jon Snow and Daenerys Targaryen meeting in the books. Even though they have not met yet, I can just sense that palpable chemistry between these two characters based on their personalities. Close in age and maturity, these are two young leaders with a can do attitude, keenly interested in reform and rebuilding a new world. And yeah, Daenerys is really beautiful and yet IMO Jon Snow is going to fall for her personality, regardless of her appearance and not because of it.

And I think that's key considering GRRM's themes of beauty being skin deep and what's important is who we are and not how good looking we are. And despite Jon and Dany not meeting yet, he's laid the groundwork for them getting along like a house of 🔥

[silversodas]

What Happened Between Crimson and Moxxie’s Mom?

The flash back Moxxie had paints an interesting story, and it also gives Crimson a more interesting motive then “because he’s an asshole” the first thing I noticed is that he is definitely jealous of Moxxie

Moxxie can’t cut his stake on his own so Mama cuts it for him

Crimson has this odd tension about him, which could be read as him being annoyed that Moxxie couldn’t cut his own food, but this tension is held inward it’s not projected out to Moxxie, which is why Moxxie doesn’t even notice.

He is glaring at Moxxie’s mom but the tension is still held inward, showing he is conflicted about something.

People have mentioned that him getting angry at her pulling away from this is a sign of aggression and it is, but it’s also interesting that the initiation of the touch was not, it’s almost timid, it’s careful. All this together gives the impression that Crimson is jealous of the affection she shows Moxxie and he wants her to want to give that to him and she turns him down flat.

It’s possible that when dating the relationship was not working out, but then she gets pregnant. It’s often herd that women use pregnancy to tie down a guy, but men can do that too. Did he threaten to take Moxxie? I mean it’s possible, but maybe he didn’t have to. When guys try to keep a girl through pregnancy he doesn’t have to threaten with responsibility, it’s actually easier just to make it more appealing that she won’t have to do it alone and that he’s gonna be there for her and the baby. And if he was already rich that probably made it a much more attractive option then being a single mother in literal Hell.

But unsurprisingly, trying to keep someone who might not even be that into you makes for a vary unhappy marriage.

This is possibility #1 possibility #2 is “I love you, but I never should have had a kid with you”

It’s possible that Moxxie’s Mom is a morally gray person that was perfectly fine with her husband’s work, her being a woman, in crimsons eyes, ment she didn’t have to get her hands dirty. I also think it’s a possibility because she was never afraid of Crimson, hinting at a trust that he wouldn’t hurt her even though he has the power to do so with a snap of his fingers, but that could be because she was trying to stay brave for Moxxie both are plausible. What I am getting at is that having children can change you and your relationship drastically, so it’s possible that they were on the same page and she was still in love with him, until they became parents. Like the shooting range for example

She was fine with Moxxie learning to use a fire arm, what she wasn’t ok with was Crimson teaching Moxxie to kill people.

If you look closely you see Moxxie’s moms silhouette in the background, Crimson is looking to her first before teaching Moxxie. Almost like he is making sure she is watching. And she never felt powerless to do anything, she didn’t hesitate to shove the gun back into crimson’s hands and walk off without a word. So it gives me the impression he is looking for her approval, that he is contributing to Moxxie’s shooting lesson. And him being angry at her taking Moxxie and leaving the shoot range tells me one of two things

1) His Mom has been rebuffing Crimsons attempts to teach Moxxie the family business for years and it’s frustrating him that she wont see it his way already

2) Crimson doesn’t see where being a better person gets you, so it makes perfect sense to make Moxxie like them. And it pisses him off because before Moxxie was born, to her, this was the good life, before she got pregnant she would happily sit in his lap while he talked to her about his day as long as he didn’t bring work home and get blood on her carpet. But NOW she has a moral compass? NOW that life isn’t good enough for our son?

I admit I like possibility #2 because it would be relatable, my brother used to run with people who liked drugs and a little after high school too, and it’s heartbreaking to learn who is actually your friend and who was only your friend in a certain circumstance, like he was just part of the indulgence. I work at a bar and that’s happened to a couple of regulars too. They had more drinking friends then actual friends.

It would also be interesting if she was ok with her life with Crimson, but wanted her son to be better then them, not be like them. And this difference in priority caused her to fall out of love with Crimson, but there is one more thing that makes me think of possibility #2

It’s when his mother is gone and it’s just them now. Crimson is full on hate glaring at Moxxie, I think it’s to show he blames Moxxie for their relationship going bad, to me this glare says “everything was fine until YOU showed up”.

But then again He could just be blaming Moxxie for his relationship issues simply because he can and her loving Moxxie more is also Moxxie’s fault, the alternative is blaming himself and he isn’t about to do that.

And as for Moxxie being born in the Wrath Ring, his parents either 1) didn’t get married till after he was born or 2) she already tried leaving Crimson once because she wanted her baby away from that life style, straight up Kill Bill style but he found her and either threatened her or convinced her to come back by convincing her he was a better financial option for the baby

But it’s just a theory

[mythuzalasheir3]

A word on The Michaela Stirling Discourse™️ Bc I have thoughts, a rant

Aside from the blatant homophobia and biphobia toward this change, a common complaint I have seen about the Michaela Stirling gender swap and Bisexual Francesca Bridgerton is the fact that it cheapens her (Fran’s) plotlines of infertility, love after loss and the different kinds of love by having her be instantly attracted to Michaela within thirty seconds, feeling the kind of love her siblings have with Kate, Simon and Penelope.

Being queer does not negate one’s fertility, exhibit A, me, an infertile bi woman. And Fran could and should still have an infertility storyline while in a relationship with a woman. We could possibly see her struggle conceiving with John and then when she re-enters the marriage mart, she could be finding someone to secure her future by having a child and earnestly be attracted to them (as she’s BI), while beginning to see Michaela as more than just her late husband’s cousin.

And having that moment between Fran and Michaela doesn’t completely undermine the point Francesca and Violet’s arc was making, even though I get how it can be seen that way. The whole point of the arc was that both kinds of love can coexist, both quiet love and sweeping romantic love, and one does not diminish the other. And as a bi woman, that moment between Michaela and Fran and the kiss at the wedding read more as Fran slowly beginning to realise that maybe she’s interested in women, and that doesn’t mean she’s attracted to Michaela in particular right now, she just spurred a bit of an awakening

ALSO bi people are still bi no matter the gender of their partner!

Also I have heard people explain that Fran and Michaela can’t have a proper happy ending due to the time period. To that I say, it’s historical fantasy, lighten up, anything could happen and the writers could weave a way to give them a happy future together.

Honestly, I was so ecstatic to see not one, but two bisexual Bridgerton siblings! (honestly hoping for a genderqueer reimagining of Sophie bc I feel like that’d be a vibe and also sapphic Eloise bc that bitch is as straight as I am which is to say not at all)

TLDR: stop being obtuse about the Michaela Stirling change and see its potential for interesting stories xoxo

[novelcain]

Heyo, I have a bit of a prompt for ya. So I’ve seen the “Demon that wants to abduct and forcibly marry Reader,” post(s) and raise a “The local regent/king finds Reader attractive (in a way that he views her almost like a novelty than as a whole person) and offers her a position as a concubine/ ‘palace lady.’” This is a different kind of scenario because straight up murdering the king of the area is not exactly the option that’d let the journey continue smoothly and refusal could also be construed as an offense to the king, but Reader does not want to and needs to continue with them on the journey. All of the other disciples know this, and maybe can tell she’s uncomfortable (even if it’s before Wukong has really fallen for Reader, she is still someone he would consider to be his friend at the very least). How are they going to get out of this one? (Slightly inspired by the time Tripitaka was propositioned in the Kingdom of Women by the Empress.)

Ps: sorry if this is dumb, regardless, I hope you have a good day - 🌺 anon

King: So what do you say, girl? Will you become my concubine? I see no possible reason for you to say no! I can give you all you could ever ask for in exchange for serving my every whim! That seems like a wonderful deal for a woman like you that clearly comes from nothing.

Reader:

Wukong:

Sandy:

Pigsy:

Ao Lie:

Reader: Wha-What?

Tripitaka: N-Now wait just a minute, your Majesty. You c-can't simply expect her to drop everything and stay here-

King: Well of course I can! I am the king of these lands! In fact! I insist upon it! Woman, you shall stay here and serve your new king immediately as soon as you are cleaned.

Reader: *feeling a panic attack approaching as the room starts to spin*

Wukong: *holding back the urge to commit violent murder*

Sandy: *rethinking this whole "pacifism" thing*

Pigsy: *looking disgusted at the king*

Ao Lie: *wondering if anyone would notice if he turned back into a dragon and ate the king*

Tripitaka: *trying so hard to think of a peaceful solution while also trying not to cry over how much the king is objectifying Reader* Y-You can't just h-have her! She's a necessary part of our pilgrimage!

King: By the Heavens! She's just one woman how valuable could she be!? After all, she is just your maidservant is she not!?

Tripitaka: *remembering that is the disguise they came up with for her* Yes, b-but! Why must you have her, great King!?

King: Because I have never seen a woman like her before! She is a beautiful foreign flower that I simply must have for myself! Here! I shall be merciful and send you off with another servant!

King: *gestures to his guards to find a servant*

Wukong: *reaches toward his ear for his staff*

Sandy: *reaches for his spade*

Pigsy: *reaches for his rake*

Ao Lie: *gets ready to turn into a dragon*

Tripitaka: *frozen in shock*

Reader: *sees the carnage about to begin*

Reader: I HAVE A DISEASE!

Everyone: *stops and turns to face her* HUH?!

Reader: I... have a disease.

King: *narrows eyes in suspension* And what is the name of this disease?

Reader: *sweats nervously as all knowledge of every disease she knows of decides to take a vacation from her brain at the one moment she needs it most*

Reader: In... junct... co... itis.... Injunctcoitis.

Everyone:

King: I have never heard of this Injunctcoitis. *turns to the court physician*

Court physician: Neither have I, your Majesty.

Reader: It's a northern disease! From the north! Where I'm from!

King: *looks at court physician*

Court physician: It is possible, your Majesty. *approaches Reader starts inspecting her* And what are the symptoms?

Reader: Oh, w-women don't have any symptoms. *takes a deep breath and composes herself* But for men it makes their dick fall off.

Everyone: IT WHAT!?!?!?!

Reader: Yep! After two months, yo dick just gonna... fall off. And it's a sexually transmitted disease.

King: I can't take any risk of that being true! Get them out of here before this disease spreads to the kingdom!

The Pilgrim Gang: *gets escorted out of the kingdom*

Everyone:

Reader: *sniffles*

The boys: *hugs Reader*

P.S. this so wasn't dumb I had fun writing this 🤭

[adventuresshewilllive]

I love my girlfriend.

I love her for the strong, caring woman she is.

And she is full of love.

But I have to admit that I'm an open minded dirty boyfriend and I think this is better than being one of those jealous and possessive ones.

I must confess that I would like to let my beautiful girlfriend experience other men.

But why?

It's not that I want another man to fuck my girlfriend, but that she can live out all her filthiest fantasies.

And I know she would never do this because she would feel like cheating. She comes from a very religious family where that would be an absolute taboo.

But cheating implies dishonesty. 

If a girlfriend tells her boyfriend about every man she has fun with, that's not cheating. 

In my opinion, it's just great sex.

And I know she loves great sex and new adventures, because she's a curious little thing.

I want her to know that in my opinion being a faithful girlfriend does not mean having sex only with me.

She knows that I have no insecurities in sharing her with other men. 

And all I want is for her to explore her fantasies just to enjoy herself. 

I know I will always be her alpha male.

I want her to admit that she thinks about other guys.

In a few months she will say: "I could never share my boyfriend, but I love that he shares me. When I realized that he was serious about me sleeping with other men without it being an excuse for him to have other women, the world became much more interesting."

My girlfriend is 26 and has only had a few cocks in her life. This post is for her. To show her that I support her gaining more experience. I encourage her to live all her wildest fantasies.  

I want her to be my dirty vixen girlfriend. Her pleasure is my passion.

A vixen is a woman in a committed relationship who seeks attractive males for sexual pleasure with the full knowledge and permission of her boyfriend, who doesn't want this for himself.

Being a vixen is getting the love of a relationship and the sex life of a single.

And no matter how often and well she is fucked, a loving vixen will always truly need the love of one man.

I think being a vixen is a beautiful result of a perfect relationship full of love and trust.

She can go on a Tinder date or invite a hot couchsurfer she has chosen and seduce him…

A non-jealous boyfriend means she never have to wonder what it's like to fuck a guy she likes.

And I know how she gets all submissive for a nice cock. 

I want her to get down on her knees, show other men her best skill and swallow their darkness.

I wanna hear her say: "I can't imagine having only one cock for the rest of my life. I still want to try so many men. But you are my home, I love only you!"

I want her to taste at least one other man this year and tell me all about it in detail!

Not a single day goes by that I don't imagine my girlfriend being a dirty little vixen.

She will always be my girl. But that doesn't mean she can't be someone else's slut.

The perfect girlfriend is devoted to one and experienced with many.

A relationship should not be the end of our fantasies, it should be the beginning.

At the end she will say: “I love to have new experiences with all the men. This has to be part of my life from now on. There is no going back."

And I don't want that either, because my girlfriend gets prettier the more of a slut she is.

I think turning your naughty fantasies into reality is one of the most exciting things you can do together as a couple.

And by having a vixen girlfriend, she has the opportunity to live out her dirtiest desires, while I realize my fantasy of having a naughty vixen girlfriend who shares her adventures with me...

There is a saying that some of the best moments in life are the ones you can't tell anyone about.

At the beginning my fantasy will shock her & then she will realize all her possibilities.

Why do I want all this?

I finally found out that I am a stag.

A man who likes to share and show off his girlfriend.

It turns me on to know that my girlfriend enjoys herself and receives pleasure.

Every woman needs a man that teaches her how to explore all her darkest fantasies – I’m the one.

[short-black-diamond]

{His woman.}

This is just a fantasy! AU, with princess x servant/bodyguard (?), reader is a badass lady and the servant is head over heels for her. also, have fun reading!

also, I tried to make this as poc! friendly as possible. I have written some parts about hair, but I don't mean it in a bad/racist way. I'm not black, but in this story, you just have problems with your hair like I do, so I literally just inserted myself there. I just made it so other people could maybe relate to my problems too :)

Warnings: suggestive content, Your bodyguard masturbates to you behind closed doors in detail, angst-father issues/trauma/no love (at first, maybe a part two? 👀👀👀), near death experience-but not you

this is more like a story, so buckle up babes! Also, I think I'll make more parts of these, but tell me if you like it!

---

I have plenty of weird but also pretty romantic dreams, and in this one, I was some sort of princess who had to choose a husband because of being the next queen and only child and no brother and bla bla bla.

BUT. I also had some sort of, I dunno, servant? Well, someone who always watched me/my back like some sort of bodyguard. The thing was, he was pretty hot. Freckles which adored and accentuated the cheeks, neck, shoulders (+ other body parts 😏), glasses in front of tired, serious eyes, long/dark brown thick/curly locks that were always in a low pony tail and forehead fringes that gave the guy a cute but also at the same time hot look, big nose, broad shoulders, tall, muscular body (but not too buff), nice arms, veiny hands and pretty much everything that would make a woman wet swoon.

Also, the voice was to die for. Do you know professor cal? (I know him from youtube). Yeah, I had his voice in my head as the guard and let me tell you guys, I wanted that guy to become real.

Also, let's call him...Cal, okay? because of professor cal's voice, alright? and his nickname or real name will be Lasco, so when you are alone with him, you call him cal! And you're the only one who's allowed to call him that.

But that's not- okay wait that was mainly the fucking introduction of the guy of my dreams, now let me start with the introduction of the story.

---

"Your majesty, you can't just reject a man blindly-", a nameless maid said, but was interrupted by your soft glare. "And why can't I?", you asked gently, looking at her with an almost pleading look. you wanted to know the answer as well.

Your poor excuse of a brutish father and shitty leader of your country wanted you to be married to an unimportant country. The son from the country was a playboy, treated women like objects, didn't know what sharing meant, stepped and spit on other people and wasn't really interested in you, more attracted to your body.

your mother was a softspoken woman, but since women were still not respected in the monarchy, you wanted to change that. you hated that your mother couldn't stand up for herself. you hated that she got belittled whenever you were around, and you feared that it was much worse when you weren't.

One day, however, it all stopped. and you were the reason.

"Why should I marry him again?", you asked the man who was one of the reasons you came to this world. you hated to call him that.

Father.

ugh.

your 'father' gave you a glare which you reciprocated tenfold, making the geezer sitting in front of you scratch his neck nervously.

"Well, because... because I said so!" "And what use would that bring to our kingdom?"

"How dare you-" "Your highness. please tell me. Why am I going to be betrothed to a man whom I have no information over and who doesn't even seem interested in wanting to get to know me? What use would our marriage have?", you retorted quickly, eyeing the guest to your 'father's' left. His son was right next to him, glaring at you angrily. your mother only looked at you with a shocked expression before standing up to apologize-

"Don't, mother. You have no reason to do that.", you only said coldly while holding a hand towards her direction, awaiting a plausible explanation from the bastard sitting next to your king.

"Listen, me and your father are good friends, and we decided that it'd be a good idea if-"

"So you have no use for the country but just want us to get married to each other because you guys are friends? Or because your whore of a son can't seem to stop getting his dick wet and because I have never touched a man? If that's the reason, THEN YOU CAN FUCK RIGHT OFF!!!", you screamed, pulling your golden sword from it's home-your earrings-and pointed it towards the bastard.

That seemed to be the thing they were not prepared for, because the king from the other country and his son scrambled away while your 'father' was getting angry at you. But, oh boy.

How was the saying again? Like father, like daughter?

If his anger was already bad enough that most people from his own country feared him because of his temper, how would the other countries try to calm yours?

"YOU INSOLENT CHILD! WHY CAN'T YOU JUST DO AS YOU'RE TOLD?! DAY AND NIGHT AM I WORKING-"

"WORKING?! DON'T GIVE ME THAT! WHAT YOU CALL 'WORKING', IS JUST FUCKING OTHER BITCHES, LOOSING YOUR MONEY FROM GAMBLING AND GIVING ALL YOUR DUTIES TO THE POOR SERVANTS!

YOU ARE NO WHERE TO BE CALLED A KING, A LORD OR EVEN A LEADER! YOU'RE NOT EVEN A GOOD FATHER!", you roared, your voice booming louder in the castle than his ever could, grabbing the attention of all the residents of your own, soon to be castle.

your golden sword pointed towards him, and while nearly every servant and some guards gathered together to know what this family fuss was about again, they were shocked and surprised to see that you were pointing your sword at him.

sure, you had arguments and fights with that old geezer, but nothing ever was as serious as this. "You put-" "YOU LISTEN TO ME, YOU POOR EXCUSE OF A MAN, I am done with you humiliating our name, or kingdom, our country. do that you get the hell away from here, with all your fucking concubines and mistresses. and don't you ever show your face in here, or my country again. because if you do...

... then I'll find you and behead you myself."

All he could do was run, run as fast as he could, and while he was still at it, his concubines and bad partners, gambling friends, drinking friends and other bad people he liked to associate with, followed him as well while taking all their belongings, which surprisingly, wasn't less than you imagined.

After the last one was gone, your mother only whispered your name and you immediately threw yourself to the ground in shame in front of your mother. "I beg for forgiveness. Please forgive me for my big mouth and sharp tongue, mother. please don't be mad at me-"

"Mad at you? Oh, my sweet daughter, how could I ever be mad at you?", she asked, opening her arms with tears eyes and a wobbly smile. You ran towards her but held her as gently as you could, like a flower. "I fear that I do not onderstand, mother. Why are you not mad? I put shame on your name for rejecting a noble's proposal...!"

Your mother only chuckled, happy to hold her one reason to stay alive in her arms. She was also glad that everyone saw that her and her daughter were so close and that the rumours about the daughter and the mother hating each other would come to an end. "That's exactly why I am so proud of you, my love. you have mastered what I couldn't and still can not do today; express myself, voice out my uncomfy state, give my opinion...being loud. Being heard. Being understood."

You stroked your mother's back like a mother consoling her child. your mother's nerves were always on haywire when your father was around, and it was tearing your heart apart to see your mother so scared in the presence of that former bastard of a leader.

"I will try my best to help you mother. After all, you are leading this kingdom on your own now. But fear not, I will stay by your side until death will tear us apart. But even then, I will not rest in peace until I have found your soul next to mine and we can be together again, even after we've descended to heaven.", you promised. She only hugged you tighter and released a breath.

Lasco, your bodyguard, who has witnessed your great performance of strength and anger, only watched you in awe, a small blush on his cheeks. See, as you were the crown princess, the next queen and he was your guard, he had to look after you ever since he could remember. he was also your best friend and you and him did pretty much everything together.

Except...

...love.

...

It was actually not fair, to be honest. Cal had a crush on you since the first time he saw you, which was when him and you were children; even when you were chubby, had snot coming out of your nose, and always chaos-hair. what drew him to you was your calm nature. He thought of you like a flower when he first met you. Never bothering anyone. always in your own little world. You never yelled, or got really angry or made a fuss out of everything. Only when something really bothered you, did you frown, pout, and release a small and quiet 'hmpf!' sound, which he cherished forever by grabbing at his chest where his heart belonged whenever you did it.

He also found you really cute. your eyes were so adorably wide and full of wonder, wanting to explore the world with silent pleading. But since it was forbidden, you examined books, maps and even listened to adventurers and businessmen and women who sailed the world like your life depended on it.

Your hair seemed to have a mind of it's own, as it was either perfectly calm, a few strands of hair not wanting to go to their place or your hair pointing to all directions. your personality was also to respect, or gush over.

You were always a calm kid, never dared to trouble your parents, always good with everyone. you tried your best to help everyone and do your homework or train your body to fit into a queen's life. you tried to take as much off of your mother's chest and shoulders as you could, with no regard of self care.

you, with those beautiful eyes, that changed over the years.

Your body, that changed over the years.

Your mind changed too.

But it scared him.

Sure, you've gotten a lot smarter and even more helpful than you already were. you blossomed from a small, sweet, shy, friendly, peace-loving girl to a poisonous, beautifully, deathly and ruthless woman. But Cal was not even close to the mind to complain.

I mean, you've grown up, and so has he. It was just...to him, time flew by so quickly. One moment, he was protecting you from other baby princes from bullying you because of your shy nature, then you and him talked about serious topics like future and love in your teenage years, where he nearly gave out his secret of having a crush on you, and now, you had to choose a husband, rule the kingdom alongside your mother, and forbid war, even when your kingdom was one of the strongest out there.

Cal has fallen for you. And...so have you.

You fell for him the moment he gave you the promise that he'd always protect you. It was when you two were still children. He was eight and you were five at the time, but you could not mistake your warming cheeks and fluttering stomach for anything else but love towards that boy. the first few weeks, you hid from him, spoke as little as possible with him and never looked him in the eyes.

You were wondering every night if Cal knew about how you gave him heart eyes everytime you two locked eyes. or if he maybe thought of you as a pretty girl...? Or if he thought of you as a nuisance, because you thought that you'd be one to him, being a princess and all. Since you had trouble forming big sentences and tended to be shy by nature, even as a grown up, you only gave him commands, asked about his wellbeings, or nodded when he gave you an update about something.

The more days passed, the more you strived to be perfect. Not just for the people you'd have to rule over one day, or your mother, but for him. you wanted to show him that you could become the perfect leader. That you'd become a great queen. You took more care to your body when Cal made some remarks about how skin care was less appreciated these days. your hair seemed to follow your lead too, because over the years, you managed to take proper care of it.

you took more care in the way you dressed, acted, spoke and most importantly, your face. you always frowned, naturally, and you hated it. You hated when people asked you why you were looking so sad or glum or depressed or angry, and you were left irritated. so you always raised your brows to give your face not an irritated, but bored look. Better than nothing, right?

whenever you looked at Cal, you didn't see your bodyguard, but a potential lover. He was always good with kids, treated women with the utmost respect, was one of the strongest men in your kingdom and very handsome.

However, there was one information that shattered your little love world and heart yes and daydreams about Cal; you had to marry a prince. Bodyguards were not allowed as potential husbands, except for when you'd like to have a consort or lover.

You, from that moment on, forbid your feelings towards your longest friend and buried them into the darkest corners of your heart, soul, and mind. and over the months, you managed to hold proper conversations with him, plus, you didn't see him as husband material anymore.

Or so you thought.

...

NSFW:

As you were busy with making new rules, comforting your mother and firing your father's followers, Cal thought that you didn't have any use for him at the moment, which was good.

As fast as he could, he excused himself with a silver plate in front of his crotch and went straight to his room. Beforehand, he made sure that no one was in the hallway, so that they couldn't hear him doing his unholy, and unforgivable act. In his chamber, he whimpered into his hand and his other one grabbed his hard-on. His glasses went down a little, but not that he cared. Lasco moaned into his hand as he slid against the door a little, panting at the thought of you.

You, who so bravely told your father to fuck out of your life with a blade at the bastards throat which you took from your earrings. you, who always was so...cold, but at the same time so unbelievably hot at the same time. His princess, who didn't want any nameless, stupid prince. Cal didn't know what type of prince you'd like. What type of husband would meet your standards. Maybe the fictional characters you've been sighing about with a sweet smile and gazing off with a blissed out face?

C-could he call you... his princess? Could he call you...his girl?

...His woman?

At that thought, Lasco stumbled towards his bed, throwing his belt and pants to the ground before stripping off his underwear and grasping his leaking cock. It may look small in his hands, but if you saw it, you'd be really scared of it's size and girth. Much over average, about 9 and a half inches, and his girth around the width of your wrist. His mushroom head was adorably flushed a light pink, with freckles adorning his shaft and inner thighs- actually his whole body to be honest.

He pumped it a few times, abs already glistening with sweat, whimpering in a high pitched voice again, brows furrowing and shoulders shaking, his nipples growing hard at the cool air of his room, forgetting that he'd get overly sensitive when he got hard because of you. He whined when he immediately had a flashback of him following after you for safety reasons and you suddenly halting in front of him and him stumbling on you, his hips - and so his dick - brushing against your soft, plump ass. When you turned to apologize, there was only a gust of whind in form of his silhouette.

He rubbed his head a little harder, and choked back a sob. His glasses nearly fell off, but he adjusted them while his left hand shook from touching himself. he faced the door this time, his brows furrowing, as he stroked his shaft, the foreskin covering and uncovering his cockhead evertime he moved his hand up and down.

What if somebody came in? How would he explain himself?

Lasco massaged his balls gently, groaning before chuckling breathily, growing shy as he thought of you again with a cute -about to be fucked out- smile on his face.

What if you came in and caught him in this state? How would you react? What would you say? Would you get aroused too? Or bully him? Tease him? Or be disgusted by him for thinking of you so lewdly?

He cried out your name before cumming so suddenly, the orgasm shaking him. His back arched and his thighs squeezed shut a little, and his glasses finally fell down, onto the sheets which were now soiled. He felt like the walls of his room were still echoing your name and he groaned. Cal was laying on his back now, arms spread out and he stared at the ceiling.

He panted, grinning like a madman with a heavy blush. The thought of you catching him in such an incredulous act, with him parting his legs for you and chanting your name like a mantra, giving you a show-

Ah shit. He got hard again. He sighed exasperately.

Just as he was about to do the act again, this time feeling a little more guilty for picturing you doing these things to him, he changed his mind. He stood up, and took a long, cold shower.

END OF NSFW.

...

Now refreshed and not so horny anymore, the bodyguard quickly made his way over to your presence, fixing his posture and taking deep breaths, a neatly written letter which he wrote months ago, only for you and you only to read.

Maybe Cal should just confess and hope that you'd accept his feelings. But he didn't know how you felt about him. Since you were little - since the first time you two fucking met - you never really talked much with him. Cal was left wondering if you even harboured any feelings for him in the first place.

If you didn't then he'd make a total fool out of himself. If you did, then maybe...

Just maybe, he'd become your husband. Your husband, who'd try to read every single wish you had right from your delicate lips. Your lover, who'd be the man of your dreams if you said yes to the very question. Your lover, who'd swear to become the greatest king in history, with you as his strong, smart and beautiful wife. His woman.

He wanted to be yours so bad it hurt him mentally and physically whenever a love interest who wasn't him got brought up. whenever you spoke about maybe visiting or inviting a prince over made him hurl and want to punch a wall.

He didn't notice that he was already in front of your door, your deep, gentle voice immediately reaching his well-trained ears. He allowed himself to smile for a millisecond, then his smile vanished and he stepped inside.

---

Heya, how was that?

I kinda let out everything I thought in here, like for part 2!

[k3n-dyll]

Was (and still am) so excited for the sapphic pairing that's going to be in Bridgerton, but of fucking course straight women that are only 'allies' when it comes to mlm relationships (because they fetishize gay men, but that's another convo) had to act like it was the end of the fucking world that Francesca could possibly be attracted to a woman.

All of a sudden these fuckers care about historical accuracy in a show that is very blatantly not historically accurate the minute they see dykes on a screen.

"Oh but her infertility"

Please don't piss me off and act like queer women can't also have that experience. Not to mention they aren't even together right now, she's with a man, they can show her infertility experience and still let her be fucking gay.

Every new season that comes out these mfs act like they're new. If you really wanted book accuracy your favorite Bridgerton brothers would still be abusive pieces of shit like they were in the fucking books.

I hope they scissor for several minutes on screen multiple times just to piss people off good lord.