#how to approach women

[lisaquestions]

Stay the fuck away from trans women

everything in this post is TMRA garbage, not worth even arguing with.

People like this have no business speaking to or about us, let alone insisting that we should be in community with them. This is just tortured rationalization to treat us like garbage and reify patriarchal hierarchy by placing men in authority and power over women.

Trans women, you do not have to let toxic dipshits like this into your lives nor do you have to listen to them. They do not know what they're talking about, they only want to define our place as subordinate to them even as they move through the world as actual men. Be free of this garbage, be yourselves, don't let this shit drag you down.

people like this love to accuse us of terf rhetoric, but that entire post is literally terf rhetoric

also could someone who is not one of these unhinged woman-hating MRAs explain how people got to "white trans women are more male than other trans women" like they realize they're just trying to litigate excuses to say that shit and this isn't real analysis or theory right? Especially given how often trans women of color are ~suddenly white~ when people are mad at them?

[wyyvoren]

forcibly stinking ur omega for his health!

[fluentisonus]

still chewing this one over so hopefully this makes sense but one very minor running thing I feel like we get w jean valjean is that without disliking women or even believing that they're in any way unequal to him he. hm. for the most part doesn't have much normal contact with adult women after his sister (and presumably none for the 19 years he was in prison) which means that. not that he doesn't understand women so much as i feel like idk. he makes the mistake of unconsciously assuming men-are-from-mars-women-are-from-venus style that he doesn't understand them (being aware of that lack of contact & under the impression women are fairly different to men), and because he's a guy who wants to understand things & is largely self taught (often from books) especially wrt social niceties, he ends up being very credulous, in that presumed lack of understanding, of commonly held beliefs & traditional, societally reinforced ideas of gender rolls & gender characteristics, and this sometimes ends up ultimately hurting women around him despite his genuine good intentions

like obviously firstly in montreuil-sur-mer where he wants the female workers to have "pure morals" and gives them a separate workroom to the men to "remain discreet" which I think he genuinely intended as a means of making it a good work environment for the workers -- women can have privacy & focus on work & nothing uncomfortable or untoward is being brought into the workplace etc -- but as we know this backfired horrendously because it essentially resulted in fantine being fired for having a child out of wedlock & everything she went through after. and given his reaction he doesn't seem to have ever considered this a potential effect of his rules -- like he doesn't seem to have understood how those sorts of rules end up ultimately punish the women involved more than anything

and the other main instance of course is with cosette and his assumption that essentially a woman has a father, & then she has a husband & having a husband no longer needs a father (this is strengthened a lot by his own feeling of his own taintedness -- it's not the main thing responsible for what happened by any means. but it's a part of it) & this assumption is incredibly hard on her!!! she obviously doesn't see it that way at all! but it never seems like it occurs to him not to think of it in that framework bc essentially society in general sees it that way

idk I guess what I find interesting abt this is that it's a big blind spot in a guy who's otherwise extremely willing to question social biases & generally likes to take people all on a level as just another sort of person like himself. again I think in his general behavior towards women interpersonally there's nothing bad & in fact there's a lot of genuine respect there & probably willingness to learn even (in fantine 's case), but it's like he just never worked out that these ideas about gender are about as true & helpful as ideas about class or criminality etc etc

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

I know WWX has a traumatic past with dogs, but sometimes you see that the dogs just want his attention, and a part of me is unsure who to feel sorry for more. Who's more pitiable, the dejected dog, or WWX who jumps into LWJ's arms?

Ran the numbers, and it turns out they are both equally pathetic.

[idontmindifuforgetme]

choice feminism is not actual feminism and will do nothing to help push women out of the shackles we have been subjected to

No I understand this. It’s completely duplicitous to pretend that women choose things in vacuum, when in reality a lot of their decisions are influenced by the patriarchal system we were born into—makeup being a byproduct of it. I’m all for women going against the grain and existing in public without feeling the need to put makeup on.

There does need to be a push against rigid beauty standards, but putting a woman down for adhering to them just isn’t the way to me. It doesn’t mean I think every choice is inherently feminist and shouldn’t be questioned. It just means I’m mindful of not infringing on other women’s autonomy w my opinions. Besides, experiences w makeup are so different… one woman could just be wearing it bc she’s artsy and just likes the way it looks, whereas another could be wearing it bc she understands that it could help her up the corporate ladder. I wouldn’t dream of calling either of them anti feminist for doing it.

Is that ideal? No. Should it should be questioned, analyzed, changed for the better? Again, bc I don’t want my words to be twisted—yes, it should be. I was never trying to say it shouldn’t. All I was stating was that I don’t think policing women on whether or not they should wear makeup is the answer. I rly don’t. I’m not prepared to call a woman who wears makeup anti-feminist. I’m not prepared to shame a woman for wearing makeup or getting plastic surgery. I’m just not. That is not the same thing as promoting choice feminism. Like I know this isn’t the critical thinking website but being accused of being pro choice feminism for simply supporting other women being happy is crazy

[joseigamer]

Patalliro! is fascinating to me because of stuff like this. It's unapologetically gay - even within its anime which aired during primetime hours in 1982 - in a way that many later BL manga would never be, like the ones from the early 2000s which would never dare to call their characters actual homosexuals. Patalliro has actually aged quite well in this regard, there's something comforting about how campy it is.

[bonebabbles]

Scenes like this keep cropping up and I cannot help but roll my eyes all the way back into my skull

Don't worry guys, having NEW children fixed him. This famously teaches a violent man to stop hitting kids and makes him no longer feel the need to construct nightmarish scenarios so he can humiliate and embarrass those he has power over. Men whose wives produce lots of babies for them are Very fulfilled and Understand how strong bonds are supposed to be

"Instead of advising him he'd been defensive" is a REALLY INTERESTING way to phrase "got so offended at the suggestion to stop murdering women for their land that he shoved his son's face in a festering wound and told him to leave him to get eaten by maggots."

I wonder how they'd spell something like, "walked through a patch of thorns so that his son would be in physical pain and then belittled him for finding an alternate route because he wanted him to suffer" and "lied directly to his face about why he abandoned him when he realized the child could be useful"

[torchwood-99]

I don't think Lord of the Rings is a sexist book (as in that's too definitive, there's positives and negatives in its depiction of gender) or that the LOTR fandom is in entirety a sexist fandom. But I do think the fact that women take a significantly smaller amount of page time up attracts certain types of male fans, who appreciate that they don't have to read too much about women or give them much thought outside of them being rewards and love interests for the blokes.

[carlyraejepsans]

for real WHERE does the idea that [utdr humans] are nongendered so that "you can project on them" come from. their literal character arcs are about NOT being a blank slate to be filled in by the audience

i think i understand the assumption on some level for undertale, because there is a very intentional effort to make you identify with the "player character" in order to make your choices feel like your own (the beating heart of undertale's metanarrative lies in giving you an alternative path to violence against its enemies after all, and whether you're still willing to persue it for your own selfish reasons. YOUR agency is crucial).

of course, the cardinal plot twist of the main ending sweeps the rug from under your feet on that in every way, and frisk's individuality becomes, in turn, a tool to further UT's OTHER main theme: completionism as a form of diegetic violence within the story. replaying the game would steal frisk's life and happy ending from them for our own perverse sentimentality, emotionally forcing our hand away from the reset button.

i think their neutrality absolutely aids in that immersion. but also, there's this weird attitude by (mostly) cis fans where it being functional within the story makes it... somehow "editable" and "up to the player" as well? which is gross and shows their ass on how they approach gender neutrality in general lol.

but also like. there's plenty of neutral, non PCharacters in undertale and deltarune. even when undertale was just an earthbound fangame and the player immersion metanarrative was completely absent, toby still described frisk as a "young, androgynous person". sometimes characters are just neutral by design. it's not that hard to understand lol.

anyone who makes this argument for kris deltarune is braindead. nothing else to say about it.

[theyautjaarchivist]

Some Yautja OC x Human memes

[tenderperversion-moved]

(kicking a hornets nest) i think i would like chappell roan much more if it didnt feel like her attraction to women comes from disillusionment and dissatisfaction with men.

[maskofnova]

Sonic twitter is so fucking miserable, holy shit.

[sunscall]

dennis saying "we spend every waking minute together [with charlie and frank], it'll be good for us to keep our distance" as an excuse to not share a table with them during his monthly dinner with mac... as if he and mac aren't the ones who ACTUALLY see each other 24/7 since not only do they work together, but they also literally live together too. incredible.

[rriverrunning]

i just reached theon's first pov chapter and was really interested by his narration style. like, even more than an unreliable narrator who the reader is meant to mistrust, he almost reads as a foolish narrator who the reader is meant to look down upon a bit, because he is so obviously mistaken and we know better.

(acok theon i)

this really reminds me of a lot of sansa's early thoughts of becoming joffrey's queen:

(agot sansa i)

and while obviously these streams of thought come from very different places -- sansa is (for all she knows at the time) correct, as she's betrothed to the king, while theon's aspirations are a lot less based in reality -- they do share this arc of using fantasies to deal with unpleasant realties, until the reality becomes too unpleasant to justify or romanticize any longer.

and i think (knowing what happened to sansa & vaguely knowing what happens to theon) this is a really interesting aspect of their stories to compare and contrast, the theme of disillusionment and disappointment with somewhere they believe they belong.

at the end of agot, we see sansa longing for winterfell after her father's death, once she's learned that king's landing and court life are not all that she dreamed they'd be.

(agot sansa vi)

which makes me wonder if (or likely when) theon will do the same: how long will it take for his cold experiences with his family, estrangement from his former home, and subsequent bad experiences to make him long for winterfell or the starks.

this isn't a crazy deep analysis, like i know that "you don't truly appreciate what you have until it's gone" and "all that glitters is not gold" are really common themes, but i think that the sequence of these stories is really interesting. just after sansa has been faced with the horrors of king's landing, theon arrives at pyke bright eyed with fantastic expectations of grandeur. and since we've just witnessed sansa's journey, the reader is primed to expect the worst for theon's future too (the tone of his chapter also contributes to this). very interested to see where these arcs go!

[oldbookshop]

i'll get flamed for saying this around here but idk i think it's weird to ask actors how much they enjoyed kissing each other 💀

[lucabyte]

stray homestuck2 thought: there's something about how jake likes blue ladies; and jane, who is coded blue, but chooses to wear red.