#and I am very much not one for going clubbing | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

gatorbites-imagines · 2 days ago

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Hi, can I please get Wally West x trans reader? Maybe something where the reader is feeling dysphoric and he comforts them, and also some dry humping?

Wally West x FTM reader

Headcanons

Readers vaguely based off of Daredevil, since I like that guy a lot. And the mental image of Wally and his gritty boyfriend is fun to me. Don’t correct me on if keystone city is right, idc.

Nobody could really tell when you and Wally started dating. You just happened to be a vigilante in Keystone city before Wally showed up after being kid flash and all that. His presence really messed up your mojo.

You were the devil incarnate, ready to break as many bones as it took, but you didn’t kill. That didn’t stop you from maiming folk though. Having Wally swoop by to bring people to the hospital and then be back to try and lecture you, really hurt your image.

You were there first though, so there was no way Wally was gonna stop you from doing what you had to do. In the beginning it was kind of like a new tomcat showing up in someone else’s territory.

You didn’t have the speed to be all over the city like Wally, so it was kind of accepted that hed take care of everything else when you were busy. People started begging for Wally to be the one to catch them doing a crime, since you’d break their kneecaps, and then nail them in the head with your billy club.

The relationship between you two was kind of a running joke in the league, especially in the Titans. They all knew that Wally thought you were hot in your own broody, horned way. Someone, probably Garfield, would joke about your suits matching, since you both were red. And yellow, if you wear the yellow and red daredevil suit.

You two were kinda like Batman and Superman, in a way. With you being broody, growly, the night, I am vengeance and will make you suffer the consequences. And Wally being easier going and lighter, full of jokes and hope.

That didn’t mean Wally couldn’t snap and get down and gritty if he needed to. That was probably when you started feeling attracted to him in return, when he couldn’t go easy on somebody who deserved it.

Up until this point you’d have picked up the changes in his pheromones and body heat, as well as his heartrate, which made you understand that he liked you. But it was after you smelled the blood on him and heard his blush rushing through his veins from an almost animalistic adrenaline that you started returning the feelings.

You guys probably date for months, if not a year before the league and the Titans figure it out. Wally would say something about needing to get back to the city since he had to make it in time for your anniversary dinner, and that’s when everyone would figure it out.

The two of you a very much opposites attract. Someone is gonna try to use your relationship with Wally to make you join the league, but he wards them off before you can break tall their teeth for even asking.

You being trans doesn’t matter much to Wally, outside of how it may affect your relationship. And by that I mean, if you for example don’t want him touching your torso or specific areas of your body, what wording to use, helping you with your T injections, so on and so forth.

Hes more perceptive than people think, at least after you guys have been dating a while. Hed start noticing the different signs that point at you feeling dysphoric. Like you going out for longer patrols because being the devil makes you feel more masculine. Or you wearing your binder for too long, if you need one of those.

I don’t think hes just gonna appear and demand answers, instead Wally has tried to figure out overtime what might help. He knows you aren’t the type to just talk about all your feelings and what can be done about it, so Wally would try to find other ways to be supportive and helpful.

You can always tell what he’s doing, since Wally starts going on about how handsome his boyfriend is, how manly you are and smell, how good your muscles look. Even if he’s buffer than you, you better expect him to drool over your muscles.

If you are fine with being touched, Wally would also just cuddle you when you have days where you struggle to look at yourself or even being in your own body. Hes always ready to talk or make changes if he can do anything to help, or just lay in silence if that’s what you need too, even if laying still for a longer time is difficult for a speedster.

Having a speedster boyfriend also means it’s easy to sense it’s him. Having the abilities you do, means you can point out any hero or villain you’ve met before, even in a crowd of a thousand. But the speedster’s connection to the speed force makes them so easy to point out.

It becomes a comfort for you, to feel the buzz that’s seemingly always present around Wally. It’s different around each speedster, but Wally is the most special out of all of them, to you anyways.

Having a speedster boyfriend also means you have access to something very few do, a boyfriend who can vibrate and who has close to no recovery period. This just means Wally is all over you on days where you are fine with that.

And if its one of those days where you want to get off to deal with dysphoria, you barely have to say anything before he’s on you, or beside you, or behind you.

Dysphoria means you don’t want to be touched skin on skin sometimes, and on days like this, good ol dry humping is just as good as anything else Wally could think up. Hes especially a fan when its him laying down and you on top.

It makes you seem so strong and in charge, even if your eyes can’t meet since well… you cant see like the average person. Wally is just giddy and almost buzzing out of his skin as you guys grind together, his hands shaking where they’re holding your hips.

Your heightened senses let you notice just how much he starts buzzing when he gets close. Other people would never notice until he’s just above to fall over the edge, but you can almost taste how his scent and pheromones start buzzing in the air when he’s turned on.

Hearing his heart race and his blood rushing through his body becomes a turn-on in its own way, just as much as grinding down on him and listening to him moan. Wally is also the type to kiss when you guys grind together, his tongue almost fizzy feeling against your own.

It becomes a lot easier to forget your dysphoria with a boyfriend like Wally, who does everything in his power to distract you from it, especially when he gets to rut against you and moan into your ear or neck. Just watch out for small sparks that might come off him, and that your senses don’t get too overwhelmed thanks to the speed force.

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arislary · 2 days ago

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Nipping At Your Nose - Han Jisung x f!reader Oneshot Preview

Synopsis: You're spending the holidays at the club with your roommate and things take a turn for best when you meet the blue-haired bartender who turns out to be more than what you expected.

Or Han Jisung as Jack Frost a.k.a. club owner

Genre: s2l, fluff, smut

Warning: 18+ MDNI, unprotected sex (wrap up!), biting kink, sexual assault (reader is groped and handles her own), weed consumption, alcohol consumption

A/N: I totally meant for this to have been posted for Christmas, but who am I kidding, it got away from me! EXTREMELY UNEDITED, but Han Jisung's blue hair is wrecking me and I needed to write about him immediately. Just gonna add a note just in case the title isn’t enough, this is JUST A PREVIEW not the full oneshot yet! Bare with me 💕

Release Date: Sunday, 12-29-24

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I tapped the bar as I threw the shot back, holding in from making a face as I brought the lime to my lips. I turned to my right grinning as Damian glared at me as he sucked on his lime. I had convinced him to come out as a celebration for finishing the week and to celebrate the holiday season. With Christmas being tomorrow, this had been the only club we could find that was open. We had both started new jobs at the beginning of the month and had finally found the time to celebrate our accomplishments. Even as roommates, we still barely saw the other with how much work we did.

On top of the fact that this would be my second year spending Christmas after having been no-contact with my family. A distraction was a must. I went out of my way to make the holiday special for myself and refused to allow the lack of family stop me from treating myself and those I loved. Damian had decided to spend the holiday in the states rather than go home to visit his parents in Australia as he normally did.

“Literally so many different ways we could be celebrating,” Damian groaned, head falling back as he leaned away from me. A laugh bubbled from my lips as I called out to the bartender to request for another round of drinks.

The original bartender, a cute muscular man, that had been serving us had been occupied and turned to the man squatting next to him that had just come from their backrooms. I watch the two converse before the man squatting stood up to come over to us and suddenly I’m greeted with wide brown eyes, blue hair and chubby cheeks.

I felt myself pause as I took in the good looking man in front of me. His black long-sleeve shirt was loose around his frame, rolled at the sleeves. He had one gold chain hanging from his neck and various rings and earrings decorating his person. My eyes watched as he rubbed his hands on the rag that had been hanging on his shoulder. His very veiny hands at that. My eyes stuck to the way his long fingers clenched around the towel. I felt my mouth start to salivate the longer I stared. His eyebrow raised as I stayed silent longer, glancing over to Damian who looked ready to burst out laughing.

Damian shoved an elbow into my side, causing me to flinch and sit up right in my chair. I stared wide eyed at the bartender, brain coming to a complete stop.

“I wanna hold your hand-”

Girl.

“NO! I mean-“ my hand shot out in front of me, shaking at him, other hand covering my mouth in disbelief. Damian shook in chair, practically falling out of it from how hard he was laughing. The bartender’s smirk stretched into an amused smile, his hands now coming to rest on the bar as he let out a huff of laughter. “Can I please get a rum and coke?”

I mumble out my order, my eyes refusing to leave the bar-top as Damian continued to laugh, attempting to give his own order. As soon as the grinning bartender walks away to make our drinks, I turn to the ‘Brutus’ sitting next to me, taking my turn to shove an elbow into Damian’s ribs now, hissing in his ear.

“Thanks for the help, ass!”

He yelped and rubbed at his side, eyes narrowing at me, but the smirk on his face gave him away.

“It didn’t look like you needed my help with how you practically shoved his pants down and started to suck his d-“

“Alright, I have a ‘Manhattan’ for the gentleman and-“ the “too-cute-for-his-own-good” bartender returned with our drinks laying them down in front of us one by one. “A rum and coke for my new favorite customer.”

He shot me a wink as I sputtered reaching to grab my drink, fingers barely grazing his. I jumped a bit, quickly bringing the drink up to my lips, straw bumping my top one before making it into my mouth. Way to go, ______, way to go.

The bartender leans forward, hand outstretched towards me. His shoulders and arms seeming so big, making a flash of heat go through me. My eyes dart from his hand back to his face, stopping once, several times, at his lips.

“You said you wanted to hold my hand right?”

More like put your fingers in my mouth, but sure.

#han jisung #stray kids #han jisung fanfic #han jisung x reader #jisung x reader #stray kids fanfic #han jisung smut

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himblebo · 7 months ago

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In Act 2 of Lempicka when Tamara and Rafaela enter Le Monocle for the first time they look around at all the women together and Rafaela says “a room full of nothing but US” and Tamara says “let’s never leave” and guys I just went to a lesbian bar for the first time (okay it’s actually a deli but they turn it into a lesbian bar at night) and GUYS? That is the safest I have ever felt out drinking and dancing and I felt so natural and I was surrounded by other queer women and that’s. That’s the first actual queer space I’ve been to in YEARS and especially post-pandemic. And I’m feeling such an overwhelming mix of emotions right now because I didn’t realize how isolated I felt from the queer community in my day to day life (ie not online). I just. God.

Dedicated queer spaces are so important. Lesbian bars are so important. This is the only one I’ve been to but I’m VERY aware that these days there are fewer and fewer of them but I just. I didn’t know how badly this kind of place and experience and connection to community was missing from my life until I suddenly had it tonight.

#also within ten minutes of walking in a woman came over to ask me about my Lempicka tattoo #rip lempicka gone too soon #honestly I don’t think I would’ve agreed to go out tonight if it weren’t for the amount of reflection and reckoning I’ve been doing #since seeing lempicka for the second time #I wouldn’t have been so gutted about its closing if it hadn’t made me feel so SEEN and UNDERSTOOD #and the scene at le monocle is like a microcosm of that within the show #with all of the women approaching Tamara about how her art #her paintings of women #make them feel seen #like that is that show and that was this night for me #thinking about how repressed and isolated I really am in my personal life #and how quickly a show like Lempicka gets taken away from us #it really made me think like ‘shit.’#if I don’t find a way to connect and engage with the queer community it is entirely possible that something awful will happen #and I’ll never have the chance to #like I need to just fucking live and find it instead of staying at home and wondering #I am very much an introvert #and I am very much not one for going clubbing #not that this was a club per se #but it’s the kind of thing where every once in awhile I know I need to push myself #I need to make myself go out #because when I do I have moments like this #lempicka #lempicka musical #lempicka broadway #tamara de lempicka

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mrsmarlasinger · 7 months ago

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Wish I liked that system I met at the gay club but unfortunately I only like the host cuz all her alters are annoying and rude 😔😔

#the host is suchhhh a sweetie but the alters tell me to shut up and try to use me for sex and such #also the last time we went to the club the one alter was THROWINGGGGG his thirsty ass at our one friend who wants me so bad #but she doesn't want that alter or anyone in the system. and i don't want her (our friend) cuz i want the system host #so it's basically a marla singer/the narrator/tyler durden situation‚ yeah #and i do not want to be involved in any poly drama so Friend and System can enjoy their bullshit idc. fuuuuck that shit #however i am going to get piercings with Friend this weekend and i am very **slightly** into her so 🤷‍♀️ how uninvolved am i really #not that it matters that much bc System is in a different state for school rn and uhhhhhhh #thank FUCKING god for that. the situation was getting dire #no more drama 🥰#personal

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cemeterym · 3 months ago

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i'm begging my uni to stop making every fucking student social activity something where you have to walk around a bunch if you are a slow walker who cannot help it they literally want you dead

#i try to walk as fast as i humanly can. which i shouldn't bc it hurts and makes me dizzy. and i'm still slower than everyone else #last week we divided into groups and had to walk to checkpoints around the city to do tasks #i had a friend in my group who knows abt my issues and they walked slower with me which was nice. everyone else walked like 10 20 meters #ahead and it was fucking embarrassing bc for every checkpoint they had to wait for me #and i felt bad my friend couldn't talk to anyone else in the group bc they were zooming way ahead of us and i'm the one who couldn't keep up #and like. they didn't know my body's fucked. but these are people i do not know well at all and maybe i don't wanna disclose my medical #history to everyone i interact with #and like this event wasn't mandatory. i could've skipped it #but it's every fucking time #most nights we end up going to a bar and to these people “walking distance” is like a half an hour. and they walk fast #i can never keep up #i don't reallu enjoy bars either and i don't drink but you just kinda have to endure to socialize. some days i can't handle it tho #this week there's another checkpoint type activity. i know i shouldn't. i know i'm gonna slow everyone down #but i got specifically asked and invited to be a part of a team. i can't remember the last time that happened #also we're doing a group costume and mine includes platform heels on the streets of a very old city i am so cooked #my friend is nice tho. they know the basic lore and check up on me a bunch which always catches me off guard 😭#i'm used to pushing through and also used to people not really taking my shit into consideration so i don't know how to respond sometimes #2 people in the group know the issues and i just sent the gc a “sorry in advance i can't walk very fast” so like what else is there to do #only accessibility info we're ever given is if it's wheelchair accessible. and that's good. like you should do that. but it kinda ends there #like how much walking is there. where are the stops. are there places to sit.#i love having to either push through or be excluded disabilities are awesome #been in soooo much pain lately and have to take breaks walking uphill. functional body #i live in an area where everything. literally everything. is uphill one way or another. so as you can imagine it's going great #also “you have to endure to socialize” as if i don't end up hovering around my friend like a lost puppy with separation anxiety anyway #the group costume is winx club. btw

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icewindandboringhorror · 5 months ago

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Everytime I face a new character limit on a website that didn't have them before/used to have really long ones... AUGHHhhh the modern social media world was not made for people like me (lovers of details, rambling, elaboration, thorough explanation, and nuance)

#twitter and other short form shit and everything being a Phone App On Small Screen instead of a Proper #Computer Website i feel like has just ruined the format of literally everything for me. Thoughts just keep getting more and more condensed #with detail and nuance taken away. everything over simplified into only the basics. blah blah blah. I've already probably rambled about thi #all before but it's just SO frustrating. I literally just CAN NOT talk that way!!! even if I try!!! I took multiple advanced placement #english & language arts classes in school and I literally never made below an A on any assignment EVER except for ESSAYS #where I would legit get almost failing grades just because I cannt express myself concisely. I took an english placement test thats made to #like evaluate your competency in a subject and out of the 102 multiple choice questions I only missed TWO of them. almost a perfect #score. But for the 5 open response questions (about articulating thoughts succinctly) I did not get a single one of them lol #I only got partial credit on 3. It's like I OBVIOUSLY understand the material and I know how Words Work and how to analyze and interpret #meaning and etc. etc. But it's just when I have to express myself CLEANLY I can't. It's always ''well you have very good points and you #get around to the idea eventually and I think it's very insightful - but it just needs to be shorter/the side tangent needs to be removed/#etc.'' I've always wondered if it has something to do with being on the schizophrenia spectrum and how that can cause disorganized #speech sometimes hmm..ANYWAY.. But I just naturally express myself in a very particular way which is lengthy and I can't rea #ly seem to control it. So it's basically like just.. being gradually pushed out of every place that won't accomodate people with different #ways of like perceiving and expressing or etc. Everything cannot ALWAYS be 100% 'Short and Snappy and To The Point' or a quippy one #liner or the Bare Minimum of information being provided or etc. Some peoples brains just do not work like that!!!!! Sorry I operate #in detail and elaboration lol. ANYWAY.. I still sometimes use random ''dating sites'' like OKCupid to look for platonic friends since #I never leave the house so it's hard for me to just meet friends naturally. And I just realized today that they added a RIDICULOUSLY small #character limit to their messaging system (2000 words?? augh). And also took away answer explanations (when you answer a compatibility #question you used to have a space to give detail and explain why you answered the way you did) and removed a few other features and it's ju #t like.. how the fuck is any of this actually helpful in terms of judging compatibility? take away ALL nuance and anyting that actually #is meant to tell you anything about a person? Bumble's character limits for your profile description are even more fucking insane and so #is every other disgustingly minimalistic place I've seen like.. OKC used to be superior BECAUSE it allowed for a TON of detail. like back i #2016 or something there was SO much data you could look at. long form question answers. personality trait summaries. etc. Now you have #SOO little to judge off of when evaluating compatibiility it's like. You'd have better luck just throwing a dart in a crowded street and #talking to whoever it hits. Why are people so fucking allergic to reading anything longer than 3 words and providing DETAILS!! It just seem #harder and harder to find any place to meet platonic friends where you have any amount of actual data to go off of and it isnt basically #just random 'speed dating' set up shit. AARGH. &I know 'oh just join a club& meet ppl irl' 1. erm..covid. 2.I mostly want to meet ppl #in places I'd like to move so I already know ppl when I get there. You kind of HAVE to do that online. bc I am not there yet.. WISHING for #Complexity.Com where ppl can upload full 900 page psychological files of themselves. MINIMUM profile character limit 30k words lol

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cant-get-no-worse · 8 months ago

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Your writing is always great, I need you to write something to either making us optimistic about the future of the club or to make us realize how much in deep shit we actually are please 😭

Babe, just browse through my La Liga 2022/2023 tag and mourn with me. 💕

#funnily enough I’d say this: we’ve been in deep shit since FOREVER.#the way Barcelona works (ie deep issues within structure and management) goes back DECADES.#we are spectacularly mismanaged and unprofessional on top of having a victim hood complex.#the environment - whether mediatic or politic - surrounding the club is an utter and disfunctional nightmare.#in every club’s environnement there has existed corruption and favouring friends in positions you want them in #but it is especially the case for this club.#needless to say I am not saying all of fcb’s issues stem solely from itself and no exterior factors have ever influenced it.#a historically left wing club / figure head for a region/independentism movement / opposing centralism which controls the league/refs etc.#however as culers we tend to majorly - and rightfully - highlight the latest part without ever daring to question our precious multimil club #both factors (internal and external) have to be taken into account to understand ‘the deep shit’.#that said now. as I’ve said this *is not new*. we’ve had those issues for DECADES and yet this club became what it is today.#we’ve reached highest of highs and lowest of lows while dealing with aforementioned factors.#so my very tired take this evening is to chill out; nothing we can do but watch unfold.#perhaps once again La Masia youngsters and lucky choices of coach will drag us up. perhaps new political president conflict still battling #over cruyff’s heritage or against it will bring forth a good one; perhaps not.#overall a very Chill to us all.#we’re facing greatness and decadence and been on both sides of the coin; and there’s reassurance in knowing in both case we still did great.#this club has been rotting since mid 50s and you just have to roll with it and wait for the cycles to come and go.#anon ask #sorry it doesn’t make much sense rn I’ll talk about it more later. or NOT

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thedissociatives · 2 months ago

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one of my mates sent me a demo of theirs earlier today and i just got round to listening to it holy shit my friends are so talented ?????

#once again though i am reminded that anything even remotely influenced by the early 00s #emo/post-hardcore scene is very much up my alley and always will be #but yes i have good musician friends and good writer friends and good photographer friends and one friend that basically runs the media dept #at one of the local non league football clubs all these people have their Thing and here i am with about four #different things i am incredibly passionate about. i may not be as good at them but what i lack in skill #i make up for in heart. i think #anyway before i get too sidetracked. idk how many people got sent this demo but i really hope they try putting a band together for it +#their other stuff. it would go so hard live i can feel it (also i will totally try and squeeze my way in if this becomes a solid project 💀#what can i say i can play both guitar and bass ofc i'd do it)

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lavellane · 2 months ago

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i was so set on replaying veilguard for the davrinmance but oh my god im SO attached to my agent-of-fenharel hardingmancer rn i actually think the choice is out of my hands lol

#oc: evander #datv #tay plays datv #datv spoilers #deia's brother btw !!!! very much giving anders vibes if anders was kind of deadbeat oldest son who frequents the club #him having sold out the inquisition on solas's instruction and then falling for one of the scouts who was hurt the most by it #very much a mirror to solavellan except theyre literally just people and ultimately victims of their leader's organizations overarching war #and harding being sympathetic to solas enough to reach evanders conscience even during Peak radicalization #but holding solas accountable enough to potentially sway evanders mind #and then evander learning the truth about solas but also specifically what that means for harding the person hes grown to love #having to reconcile that his own rebel-fantasy is not more important than the very real pain his loved ones have gone thru as a result #and like figuring out what going forward looks like. is he STILL sympathetic but its tempered? or does he go full anti-solas in an act of #redemption which would also probably involve him telling harding to embrace her anger and not her loving side?? which is kind of the invers #of his own arc.#GOD.#AND THEN ITS LIKE. DO I KILL OFF HARDING AT THE END???? THAT WOULD BE SOOOOO CRAZY FOR THE *STORY*#i think she has to live actually bc i hate the fridged wife trope and solas Is ultimately redeemed in this worldstate #and if harding died bc of solas (and evanders varricmancer sister also lost varric) evander WOULD be team kill immediately no exceptions #but still food for thought #god. chat i am fucking COOKING today this is crazy #hes not technically my rook bc he works way better in the story as a ~companion~ to deia (his sister) the actual protag #but both he and matthas (the other pro-inquisition brother) could arguably have been the Rook as well.#all 3 of the mercar siblings were AT the ritual but for different reasons (evander to aid solas. matthas to kill solas. deia to stop him)#so MAYBE I WILL romance harding instead this time...... how are we feeling abt hardings romance babes is it good. do we recommend

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wildevenusian · 3 months ago

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i just don’t understand. why say ur ready to talk if you aren’t?

can u believe this post is what got me to reach tag limit

#vaugepostimg on main about an irl don’t mind me #i just. am feeling sad bcus i have been trying to keep my distance and respect the space they said they needed. and then they reached out to #me for their book club and said we should chat and i got excited! i miss my friend of course i got excited #still let them take the lead. i want them to be comfortable. they said they’d lmk what day they were free #and then proceeded to ghost me for like. almost two weeks??#(it was 10 days but !!! still!!! almost 2 weeks from them suggesting i come to book club which would’ve inherently necessitated an irl talk #and then after all that yesterday said they actually weren’t ready which. hurted #tbf i knew something was up after like 2 days of them not replying so it’s not like i was fully caught off guard it just really hurt #and like i feel weird bcus our social circles are really overlapped and i spent a lot of time with them last winter and i had thought #that would happen again this winter. we would swim together a lot and i consistently went to their house dinners #bcus if i care about you i show up! and i’m understanding ! bcus i am patient and kind person and as a triple taurus i’m not tryna rush ever #especially when it comes to people’s emotions ??? especially if someone has told me i hurt them???? like ik im an autistic lesbian but #despite popular conceptions on that particular identity. im not fucking evil ????? if you ask for space i will give you space !!!!!#and like when it comes to emotions and conflict i’m blunt but i’m caring and it takes a lot for me to be disinfranchised by people #or relationships. so i’m not saying i don’t want to still be her friend #i’m just. noticing behaviors #they did tell me that they were very avoidant in conflict and i told them i’m very much not and like. now that i’m on the receiving end of i #idk what to do!! i’m not gonna chase her down like they’re grown!! and again!!! if you ask for space i’m going to respect that!!!#and like honestly. i’m happy she at least gave me the curtesy of saying they weren’t ready to talk even if it took her mad long to do it #so like. who tf knows when we’ll talk. if ever. probably when she wants the validation of our friendship if it even happens at all #bcus again. she reached out not to reconnect and clear the air but to check if i still wanted to come to her club she was starting #ik in earlier conversations she was worried no one would come but ig she found people. which like good for her tbh but to be honest i feel #discarded?? i’m feeling like i’m failing to not project too much so i gotta stop but idk man i’m just feeling weird about it all #and then i had the thought today of like. is this what i want in a friendship? someone who goes back and forth abt whether or not i’m worth #which again. kinda wasn’t expecting that bcus we spent so much time together last autumn/winter/spring like. many times per week!!!#so the idea of not being her friend all of a sudden?? feels fucjing weird to think about #but like? i don’t want to feel this way this is what i hate about west coast/white people conflict resolution!! there fucking isn’t any!!!#and i can’t deal with that! i can’t spend my life with people who aren’t going to engage with me as a person who cares about them #humans are fallible creatures and were only here on earth for so long so why are we wasting time here? what is the point of all this ???????#but then the guilt and shame say i deserve it all and at that point i just need to stop so. i’m gonna stop now lol

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seilon · 4 months ago

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pro: ran into a coworker at a bar last night who I don’t really talk to usually (he works upstairs, I work downstairs) and we talked and im pretty sure we were highkey flirting and he bought me a drink and the bar merch shirt i was interested in and thanks to the power of alcohol i guess i asked for his number and he gladly gave it to me and. yeah

con: i have the second worst hangover i have ever had and have been fighting for my fucking life just to eat saltines

#it’s getting better but only now that it’s like. 6pm #as weird as it sounds part of why this sucks is that I volunteered to come into work today cause there’s a concert going on nearby which #usually means we’re at least somewhat busy -> make better tips #and I couldn’t go in because well. you know #I’ve been sick and dying in bed all day unable to move or eat or anything #let alone take the bus and go to work #but. as much as I wish I didn’t go this overboard I don’t totally regret last night cause.#yeah. potential thing going on with cute coworker guy. OH and potential job opportunity at my favorite bar in town #apparently said coworker Also has a job at the bar in addition to where we both work and the bar is hiring barbacks at entry-level #so I have someone to vouch for me and the bartender we were talking to seemed to really want me to apply too #one thing that’s kinda funny to me about all this is that the first two places (a bar then a club) we were at felt really mid because they #were packed with way too many straight people (at a gay bar and a gay club)#but the bar we ended up at (where we ALWAYS end up at. it is the oasis. it is the only thing I can rely on) felt. like. not overwhelmingly #straight? at all? I mean part of it’s just luck in a way with just who happened to be there and all that but it’s also that the staff seem #pretty significantly populated with queer ppl #I complained to the bartender about how the club we were at (one of the biggest gay clubs in the city- if not The biggest) just felt kinda #meh because yeah maybe there were some guys dancing in jockstraps and whatever but the crowd itself like. did not feel largely queer #or at least didn’t have the spirit I’d hope for in a queer space if that makes sense. felt very conventional. not enough wild outfits and #makeup and gender fuckery and so on #and the bartender was like dude I KNOW right? I went off outside there once about the invasion of cishets when this space isn’t FOR them #and so on and so forth. and god that was So real.#so the experience at my beloved bar last night was like. 1) guy comes up behind me just to order a drink but i was saving a seat for my #friend who was in the bathroom and mentioned that in case he was looking to take the seat. chatted a little. ended with him pointing out #that a guy nearby was trying to holla at me.#2) I look over and yes. the dj is. in fact. looking directly at me and mouthing the lyrics to whatever song was playing pointed my way.#it was pretty sweet honestly I think it was partly cause I looked like I was shy and alone #3) whatever gay shit was going on with my coworker and i. amusingly he seems to get more flamboyant when he drinks just like i do.#im not 100% sure what his sexuality is but i Am 100% sure it is Not straight. but yeah. if it hadn’t been so close to closing time ive been #hardcore wondering where that would’ve gone. maybe its for the best that i had to go when i did cause i was pretty drunk and who knows when #I could’ve hit the amount of drunk it takes to like outright say hey just so you know i’d suck your dick right now if you wanted

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spitefulfitness · 6 months ago

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Most of my state is in a heat advisory and it was fine when I started walking, but once I switched to running it got too hot so I cut it at a mile. If it cools off this evening, I'll go for a longer walk to reach my step goal for today.

It's been two months since I last ran due to stress and medical stuff, but I'm glad to back up and (literally) running.

I started adding some yoga too to help my body recover and increase my mobility/flexibility. Ive also been trying to at the very least make it out every day to go for a walk until i reach 8000-10000 steps. I want to try some intermittent fasting but it's a little challenging when my part time summer job involves making catering orders 😬

Glad to be back with it, though! 😊

Sw:188.7

Cw. 181.5

Gw1: 175

Gw4: 145

#wellness #weightloss #health & fitness #fitblr #losing weight #weight loss journey #runblr #running #exercise #fitness #update #its been a minute #i am glad my weight has been being consistent even though i havent been trying too much #i would like to get down 10 pounds #i am moving in a month so I'm going to focus my efforts more for the next two weeks so its not such a difficult transition later #and o think it would be helpful to do intermittent fasting #a couple of colleagues did that and were very successful #if i could get to that point for grad school that would be helpful #i have been eating well for the most part #my vice being having eggs in the morning on toast #and sometimes i just want a subway to jjs sandwich because its hot outside #otherwise ive been good!#so well get there #hopefully in a year i will be closer toy weight #having a gym will help too #and one in my new apartment building #runblog #nike run club #i initially went for a walk but my boyfriend suggested doing some running since ive been meaning to ease back into it

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13eyond13 · 2 years ago

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Sometimes I still think about how sweet it was when that anon checked on me last year when I was posting overly dark jokes. Thank you whoever you were, that was kind