#hilary potter
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Regulus is 100% one of those people who freaks the fuck out whenever he realises he has a crush like this man full-on goes into hibernation and will not speak to them for days. he also has about 19 meltdowns a week and refuses to do so much as breathe in their general direction
when he realizes he’s in love with James fucking Potter, of all people all hell breaks loose
#his friends find this hilarious btw#marauders era#regulus black#james potter#jegulus#starchaser#sunseeker#jegulus fluff#regulus black hc#regulus black x james potter#the pantheon#slytherin skittles#slytherin skittles fluff
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Rationing Insulin.
I have been rationing my insulin at the expense of my health because I simply do not have the funds to replace pens. As a result my blood sugar has been spiking and staying stagnant at dangerously high levels.
Venmo: EnyaSaint
CA: $Enyasaint
I do not know or want to know what possessed me to ration my medication knowing I could possibly die from it. I haven’t been in my right state of mind in a while.
Currently I am on the medication Toujeo and I am uninsured so I have to pay out of pocket. So I am utilizing GoodRx to get me the cheapest option. I would be so immensly grateful to anyone who could spare towards my medication. I am running dangerously low and I don’t want to die from DKA.
Goal: $365
Venmo: Enyasaint
CA: Enyasaint
#graphic design#grunge#gym#haikyuu#haircut#hairstyle#halloween#thanksgiving#handcrafted#harley quinn#harry styles#harry potter#haute couture#hilarious#history#home#home decor#homework#gems#diabetes#SoundCloud
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underrated drarry ship dynamic
#its hilarious and i think there should be more of it hear hear i do declare#drarry#harry potter#draco malfoy#drarry fan art#drarry fanart#drarry meme#draco fanart#draco fan art#draco malfoy fanart#draco malfoy fan art#harry potter fanart#harry potter fan art#hp fanart#dmhp#glove comp'ART'ment
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“spin” - Jegulus microfic - @into-the-jeggyverse - 410 words
CW: drinking / smoking
“Ok! We’re playing fuck, marry, kill!” Barty announces, overly excited.
The party has been over for a while, but there’s still a group of them lingering in the common room playing random drinking games and they’re all fairly drunk by this point.
“Alright…” Barty thinks, looking around the circle “Reg! Fuck, marry, kill–”
“James.” Regulus answers instantly without letting Barty finish.
“Ugh. Reggie, you have to wait for the… wait what?!” Sirius starts then cuts himself off when he registers what Regulus said.
“You want to fuck James?!” Sirius asks looking shocked and appalled.
“You want to marry me?” James swoons with hearts in his eyes.
“I think you’re both focusing on the wrong thing here.” Peter tries to interject.
“I think we should have played spin the bottle instead.” Marlene grumbles under her breath from the other side of the circle.
“The bottle’s pointing at James!” Regulus yells as he starts crawling across the circle to James.
“No one even spun the bottle, Reg.” Dorcas tries to grab Regulus but he’s too far away, so she just falls back to where she was laying in Marlene’s lap.
“I don’t think Reg knows how to play any of these games.” Remus says as he passes a joint to Peter so he can try to grab Sirius who just got out of the chair the two of them are sharing.
“Stop that right now! What is happening!?” Sirius trips on his way to try and pull Regulus off James to stop what has turned into a rather intense make out session.
“Is no one concerned that Reg wants to kill James?” Peter asks seriously as he lets out a puff of smoke.
“He doesn’t actually want to kill James, you high idiot.” Mary rolls her eyes and smacks Peter on the back of the head as she steals the joint.
“I wouldn’t be so sure, Reg has some weird kinks.” Evan says as he’s reaching for the half empty bottle in the middle of the circle that was never spun, but is pointing at James.
“I think everyone’s really drunk and we should all go to bed.” Lily announces from her spot on the floor, dropping her head on the couch behind her.
“I think you’re really pretty.” Pandora looks at Lily from where she is laying upside down on the couch with her legs hanging over the back, her head laying right beside Lily’s.
Regulus and James continue to make out, completely oblivious to everything else around them.
#not gonna lie#i think drunk reg would be so much fun#he would be hilarious#and cuddly#and just so in love with james#jegulus#regulus loves james#james loves regulus#wolfstar#rosekiller#dorlene#pandalily#jegulus microfic#regulus black#james potter#sirius black#remus lupin#jegulus fanfiction#marauders fanfiction#marauders#marauders era#marauders fic#harry potter marauders#harry potter#james x regulus#regulus x james#dead gay wizards from the 70s#dead gay wizards#jeggyverse microfic
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sees big black dog: "oh my god! sirius!"
sees black cat: "oh my god! reg!"
sees stag: "oh my god! james!"
sees rat: "oh my god! peter!"
sees wolf: "oh my god! a wolf! why is there a fucking wolf?? help!?!?!?"
#i think im hilarious.#marauders#dead gay wizards#marauders era#dead gay wizards from the 70s#regulus black#james potter#sirius black#peter pettigrew#remus lupin#regulus arcturus black#james fleamont potter#sirius orion black#the marauders#marauders funny#remus john lupin#harry potter#animagus regulus#padfoot#prongs#wormtail#moony#wolfstar#jegulus
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It stands to reason that Harry’s holding groceries when he runs into Draco Malfoy for the first time in twenty years.
Well— doesn’t run into, exactly. No, more like peers through a shop window like a right barmy bastard, bits of overspilling lettuce brushing his arm and passers-by on Diagon shooting him strange looks.
Of course Malfoy has to look up from the till— because, yes, Draco Malfoy is a shopkeeper on Diagon Alley apparently— and see him goggling. So, of course, Harry has to step inside, as though he meant to make a stop at— right, yeah, Narcissus Needlework Studio— all along, holding brown paper packages of vegetables.
Malfoy’s frowning when Harry makes his way over to the till.
“I don’t want any trouble,” he says. “I’ve registered the shop, everything’s perfectly within regulation—“
“Trouble?” Harry blinks. “Oh, no. I’m not an Auror. Anymore.”
“I know that,” Malfoy says unhappily. “The whole Wizarding World all over Europe knows that. Only you’ve never left well enough alone, have you, Potter?”
Harry’s forty next month. He’s lived twenty years seeing hide nor hair of Draco Malfoy, and he’s never gone looking. Well, except for that one time when he was twenty one and went to the Manor as a trainee Auror for a— well, it was a routine check, really. And that other time when he was twenty five and thought he saw a man at a club who looked just like Malfoy from the back and was convinced for four months Malfoy was back in London and must be up to something if no one knew about it. And that time when he was thirty two— and, oh, alright, Harry hasn’t ever left well enough alone, not when it comes to Malfoy, at least.
This time, though, Harry really didn’t go looking. And it’s definitely Malfoy.
“I just wanted some— thread,” Harry says. A needlework studio should have some of that, shouldn’t it?
“Thread,” says Malfoy. He looks down, deliberately, at Harry’s lettuce.
“For Molly,” Harry says. “As a, um, birthday present. New shop on Diagon, thought I’d pop by. Seemed the place, you know. Didn’t know it was yours.”
Molly’s birthday, Malfoy doesn’t need to know, is in December. It’s June.
Malfoy continues to stare at him, until Harry’s unsure whether to get indignant about it all or turn tail and flee.
“Well,” says Malfoy before he can make a choice. “Embroidery yarn for you, then, Potter. Come along.”
-
“I’ll see you again, I assume,” Malfoy says at the end of what transpires to be a surprisingly smooth purchase.
Harry nods.
He only realises after he leaves that there’s no reason for him to come back. He’s seen it for himself— what Draco Malfoy’s up to these days. Nothing nefarious or suspicious, just yarn and needles and tapestries on Diagon.
Except, well, he’s committed now, hasn’t he? And Harry Potter’s a man of his word. He said yes, when Malfoy asked— Malfoy asked!— so he’ll be back.
And really, if he has to invent Hermione’s sudden new and passionate interest in needlework— well. That’s between Harry and his lettuce.
written for @drarrymicrofic’s prompt “sewing”. i just personally think harry james potter could be seventy five and still rapidly become obsessed with draco malfoy at any given moment.
#drarry#hpdm#drarry microfic#drarrymicrofic#draco malfoy#harry potter#drarry fic#drarry fic rec#geets microfics#i just personally find this bit of their completely canon dynamic beyond hilarious#obsessed little freaks
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Harry and Snape’s Clashing Communication Styles
It's interesting to think that Harry and Snape don’t have longer conversations in the series, but when they do, their communication styles are so different that they often clash.
Harry’s way of communicating is practical and straightforward. He tends to break down complex ideas into simpler terms that he can easily understand. This makes sense, given his upbringing in a non-magical world and his tendency to rely more on gut instinct than deep theoretical knowledge. For Harry, things are usually black and white, and his directness shows his desire to cut through the confusion and get straight to the point.
Snape, on the other hand, has a more complex and layered way of speaking. His language is precise and often sarcastic, which reflects not just his intelligence but also his disdain for what he sees as Harry’s lack of subtlety. Snape’s use of imagery and metaphor, especially when he describes consepts, gives his speech a poetic, almost philosophical quality. He takes pleasure in showing off his superior knowledge and uses this as a way to belittle Harry.
We see this clash clearly in OOTP during Harry’s first Occlumency lesson:
Snape looked back at him for a moment and then said contemptuously, “Surely even you could have worked that out by now, Potter? The Dark Lord is highly skilled at Legilimency —” “What’s that? Sir?” “It is the ability to extract feelings and memories from another person’s mind —” “He can read minds?” said Harry quickly, his worst fears confirmed. “You have no subtlety, Potter,” said Snape, his dark eyes glittering. “You do not understand fine distinctions. It is one of the shortcomings that makes you such a lamentable potion-maker.” Snape paused for a moment, apparently to savor the pleasure of insulting Harry, before continuing, “Only Muggles talk of ‘mind reading.’ The mind is not a book, to be opened at will and examined at leisure. Thoughts are not etched on the inside of skulls, to be perused by any invader. The mind is a complex and many-layered thing, Potter . . . or at least, most minds are. . . .” He smirked. Whatever Snape said, Legilimency sounded like mind reading to Harry and he did not like the sound of it at all.
For Harry, when Snape mentions Legilimency, it immediately sounds like “mind reading,” which is a reasonable but overly simple way to understand such a complex concept. His quick jump to this conclusion shows his need to make sense of something that feels threatening, but it also reveals his limited grasp of the deeper nuances.
Snape, however, can’t resist mocking Harry’s lack of subtlety. His response is laced with condescension as he insists on the complexity of the mind and dismisses the idea of “mind reading” as something only muggles would think of. Snape’s explanation is detailed and philosophical, contrasting sharply with Harry’s desire for a straightforward answer.
Another great example of their different communication styles comes in HBP when Snape puts Harry on the spot, asking him to explain the difference between an inferius and a ghost:
“Let us ask Potter how we would tell the difference between an Inferius and a ghost.” The whole class looked around at Harry, who hastily tried to recall what Dumbledore had told him the night that they had gone to visit Slughorn. “Er — well — ghosts are transparent —” he said. “Oh, very good,” interrupted Snape, his lip curling. “Yes, it is easy to see that nearly six years of magical education have not been wasted on you, Potter. ‘Ghosts are transparent.’ ” Harry took a deep breath and continued calmly, though his insides were boiling, “Yeah, ghosts are transparent, but Inferi are dead bodies, aren’t they? So they’d be solid —” “A five-year-old could have told us as much,” sneered Snape. “The Inferius is a corpse that has been reanimated by a Dark wizard’s spells. It is not alive, it is merely used like a puppet to do the wizard’s bidding. A ghost, as I trust that you are all aware by now, is the imprint of a departed soul left upon the earth . . . and of course, as Potter so wisely tells us, transparent.” “Well, what Harry said is the most useful if we’re trying to tell them apart!” said Ron. “When we come face-to-face with one down a dark alley, we’re going to be having a shufti to see if it’s solid, aren’t we, we’re not going to be asking, ‘Excuse me, are you the imprint of a departed soul?’
Once again, Harry demonstrates his practical and straightforward approach. He gives a simple, clear distinction based on what would be most useful in a real-life situation—whether the entity is solid or transparent. This shows how Harry tends to focus on what’s immediately relevant and actionable, and Ron’s defense of Harry’s answer highlights this practicality. Ron even points out that in a real-world scenario, Harry’s answer is actually the most helpful, contrasting it with Snape’s more academic approach.
Snape, though, dismisses Harry’s answer as too simplistic and mocks him for stating what he sees as the obvious. Snape’s communication is more about the theoretical and precise understanding of magical concepts. He emphasizes the deeper, more complex nature of an Inferius, which, while academically accurate, is less practical in the context that Harry is thinking of. Snape’s disdain shows that he values this deeper, nuanced understanding more than the direct, practical knowledge that Harry offers.
These moments really bring out the deeper divide between Harry and Snape. Harry approaches things with instinct and a straightforward mindset, while Snape is all about nuance, precision, and seeing the layers in everything. Because they see the world so differently, they struggle to communicate, which only adds to the distrust and misunderstanding between them—a tension that echoes throughout the entire series.
#I was originally going to post about that inferius scene from hbp and talk about how hilarious Snape’s burns are#but then I started thinking about how precise and poetic his communication style is and how it clashes with Harry’s.#So now here we are.#I hope I'm not being to repetitive here because it's 4 am and I'm tired#hp#hp meta#meta#character analysis#hp series#harry potter#severus snape#severus snape meta#Harry potter meta#communication styles#pro snape#professor snape#order of the phoenix#half blood prince#occlumency#anti snaters
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Regulus Headcanon:
He knows a bunch of languages, it was something he was interested in and he actually learned them unlike Sirius. Pandora is Greek and sometimes she will ramble in Greek and Regulus matches her. Remus speaks Dutch and more often then not uses it for cursing but Regulus call him out every time. Lily learned German and gets really frustrated when Regulus knows it too. Hogwarts may have people from all over but generally Regulus can understand basically anyone it’s his biggest flex.
But he doesn’t know Hindi and of course that is the language James speaks. And Regulus doesn’t understand him. It drives him crazy. But James loves speaking Hindi to Regulus because he knows that Regulus doesn’t understand him.
#marauders era#dead gay wizards#regulus black#sirius black#james potter#remus lupin#jegulus#moonwater#regulus black headcanons#jegulus headcanon#indian james potter#James potter speaks Hindi#Regulus Black does not#and he is livid#he would probably try to learn it and fail every time#because knowing a language has never been more important#so of course now his winning streak of learning a language fluently fails#Sirius thinks it’s hilarious and starts to learn from Effie#because he wants to one up Reggie
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Sirius walks into the dorm: why is there a cat asleep in your lap?
James: ...
Regulus, said cat: ...
Sirius: we are dog people in this dorm. Why'd you have a cat!? This is such a betrayal! This would be as bad as you shagging my baby brother!!!!
James: funny story-
#this just popped into my head#and its hilarious#so accept it#marauders#regulus black#james potter#jegulus#dead gay wizards#james x regulus#sirius black#starchaser#sunseeker#james fleamont potter#regulus arcturus black#the black brothers#sirius orion black#mauraders#marauders brainrot
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Lily and Regulus are learning together in the Great Hall and Remus excitingly runs up to them:
Remus: Guess what?
Lily: You can finally ride a broom properly?
Remus: No.
Regulus: You got the potions homework right for once?
Remus: ...no.
Lily: Do we get a hint?
Remus: Something I talked about recently.
Lily: Did something happen with Professor Ferox?
Remus: Lily!
Regulus: You made a move on my brother?
Remus: Guys, who do you think I am?
Lily: A hormonal teenager who falls for every other guy.
Remus: ...
Regulus: So what is it?
Remus *puts a book down*: My new book arrived...
#heavily inspired by a conversation with my friend#i know we are hilarious#harry potter#conversations my friend and i had irl#incorrect marauders quotes#marauder#regulus black#sirius black#the marauders era#marauders#lily evans#remus lupin#wolfstar#moonwater#dead gay wizards from the 70s#dead gay wizards
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i know in retellings draco always befriends hermione because he's a nerd or whatever but this morning i was thinking of a retelling where draco befriends ron because he literally just bribes him. like he sees that harry won't bother with him and lbr no one wanted to be friends with first year hermione but ron seems like he'd be easily bought and draco's dad told him those are the easiest people to get on your side. and also wouldn't it be fun to steal away harry potter's anointed best friend?
so he's like "i'm willing to forget you laughed at my name on the train" and literally just buys ron things until he stops being indignant. he buys him a new wardrobe. endless sweets and toys. he writes to his mother like "hello i'm working on something here can u help" and narcissa is immediately on board.
and ron totally is easily bought. he really is. he pretends to still hate draco but also his mother taught him some manners so it's only polite to accept the little git's gifts. his siblings are sick with jealousy, it's great.
and slowly ron's like "maybe he's not so bad" and progresses to "yes he's weird but i've gotten him to stop with the slurs so" to actual friendship that harry and hermione eventually come around to, too.
#harry potter#ron weasley#draco malfoy#drarry#because teenage ron dealing with his best friends dating?? impeccable#also it's crucial that this happens in first year before ron is old enough to prioritize pride over getting cool stuff lol#harry (who's experienced spoiled dudley his whole life): but can't you see he's just trying to buy your friendship!!#ron: well yes but no one ever buys me anything so 🤷🏼♀️#this is a horrible friendship origin btw i get that the hermione nerd one is nicer but#it's also hilarious#just thinking thoughts on a star splitter friday ✨#headcanons
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Regulus: I don’t need to be loved I need to be feared
Sirius: Amen
#everyone else????#are y’all good#regulus and sirius: why wouldn’t we be????#listen regulus is ironically hilarious abt his childhood#like it’s horrific but is he going to ensure he’s the funniest person alive at the same time?#yes#regulus black#marauders era#jegulus#marauders era funny#marauders era textpost#harry potter#marauders#james potter#starchaser#sunseeker#sirius black#the black brothers
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Snape kneeling in Sirius’s room having a mental breakdown while surrounded with half-naked posters of Muggle women:
#i just know he judged sirius so hard after he got up 💀#i’m so pissed we don’t talk about this more often#like snape really just walked into the childhood bedroom of his old bully that’s filled with a ton of inappropriate posters 😭#jkr could’ve at least mentioned snape sneering or smth#that would’ve been hilarious#severus snape#pro snape#pro severus snape#snape#shitpost#harry potter#hp
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one of my favorite things about the deathly hallows book is the revelation that snape and petunia knew each other. like if you asked someone in 1997, “hey which two characters from harry potter have longstanding childhood beef with each other”. I’m not sure anyone would’ve answered “harry’s bitchy muggle aunt and the mean potions teacher”. but it also makes total sense. like they are the two biggest haters.
#the wizarding world’s drake vs kendrick#you decide which is which#my actual favorite revelation is that tom riddle got hagrid expelled#i love petunia’s allusion to him in ootp that harry mistakes for a reference to james and she doesn’t bother to elaborate#everyday I think about snape asking voldemort to spare lily bc he loved her & voldemort just being like “weird but okay”#like why voldemort agreed to that is hilarious to me. it’s the only time he’s ever been kinda nice? love that he has a soft spot for snape#dumbledore & voldemort being the only two ppl to find snape endearing is everything to me. like everyone’s like “snape’s disloyal”#but dumbledore & voldemort couldn’t care less. like that’s their boy#severus snape#i am neither pro nor against snape#harry potter
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[When asked about their about their break-up]
Dean: Oh we would've never worked out, the love of her life was sleeping in a bed next to me, dreaming about her
Ginny: Well the love of your life was also sleeping in a bed next to you and dreaming about you, so I'd call us even
#having harry potter feels#this conversation has definately happened and you can't change my mind#their friendship after the war would've been hilarious#harry potter#harry x ginny#dean thomas#seamus finnigan#hinny#dean × seamus#deamus
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Dumbledore: so anyway in the end harry has to die
Snape: wtf
Dumbledore: don't act so shocked lol
Snape: this is super messed up!
Dumbledore: do you actually care about him tho?
Snape: no not really lol
Harry: One day I will name my child after these two people.
#that epilogue was not canon to me#i love snape but harry watching this convo in the pensieve and then name a kid after these 2 is hilarious to me#Harry Potter#harry potter incorrect quotes#humor#my post
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