#gothic illness

[blackrosesandwhump]

Nathaniel's Bane, Part 2

Whumpril Day 29: No Appetite

CW: recovery from illness, brief magical/Gothic whump

As he sits at the dining table, nudging his dinner around with the tip of his fork, Nathaniel can feel his sister’s gaze on him. She keeps glancing at him between bites, her dark eyes flicking up to his face and back to her plate as if she’s scared he might faint right there in his seat.

“Stop looking at me like that,” he mumbles, placing his fork down next to his uneaten vegetables.

“But I’m worried about you. You were sick all night, the doctor said.” She copies him, setting her utensils down with a clink, finally looking at him directly. He can see her concern: it’s obvious in her tight mouth and tired eyes. She should be used to this by now, he thinks, wadding up his napkin in his lap.

“I was, but I feel better now,” Nathaniel says. “Look, I’m even sitting at the table.”

“Not eating anything.”

“I’m not hungry.”

“So you’re still sick!”

“Children, please,” comes the reprimand from the end of the table. Samuel Mortenbrook looks at each of them in turn, his own face mirroring his daughter’s tiredness. “Elvie, if he’s not hungry, he doesn’t have to eat. Nathaniel, she’s worried about you.” He says it all matter-of-factly, without much feeling, as if explaining something for the hundredth time. His plate clean, he pushes back from the table and beckons to the maid to remove their dishes. “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I must return to my work for the rest of the evening. I trust you can take care of yourselves?”

“Yes, Father,” Elvie replies, nodding.

Nathaniel nods wordlessly. Deep in his chest, the stone throbs once. He keeps his face passive, not wanting to betray the brief crack of pain that rockets through his body. The library. I have to get back to the library. I have to keep looking. He forces himself to breathe evenly as he leaves the dining room. The hall outside is dim and empty; he holds one hand outstretched for balance as he walks, trying not to cough. His heartbeat quickens in time with his thoughts.

I found something. Hope. A cure. Something, anyway. Something I can’t let go. Something that might make me well.

Something my family can’t ever know about.

[alicenpai]

the girl from the other side ✨ this series gave me hope a million times but simultaneously shattered my heart into the same amount of pieces </3 (flower symbolism under cut)

sticker sheet for anime north 🍀🥧🖤🤍

SPOILERS AHEAD

forget me not - obvious reference to the Black Children and how they eventually forget who they are as they near the end of their "life cycle".

white clover (in coffin) - white clovers typically symbolize innocence.

4 leaf clover - like I wrote in a previous post on my Witch Hat Atelier seasons piece, the 4 leaf clover symbolizes luck and good fortune. Like Coco, Shiva to her loved ones is a symbol of fortune, though to the Inside Kingdom, a symbol of misfortune.

sunflower - typically symbolize strength and warmth, a fitting flower for Shiva, the light illuminating Teacher's dark past.

nasturtium - another flower symbolizing strength, and has strong ties to the "victory" after battle. apparently soldiers used to don them as a sign of a long battle won. fun fact they are also edible (don't take my post for nutritional advice please) (ill probably write a bit more on this topic when my head is more clear)

[ladycatashtrophe]

"Wow, you're so self-aware! It takes most people years of therapy and dedication to get to that point." Thanks, I constantly feel completely disconnected from my physical being and the material sensation of my body, brain, and spirit/soul is so overwhelming that I often have to see myself as an objective third-party instead of an integrated entity. Father son holy spirit and all that.

[stuffbymail]

I am going to miss dungeon meshi SO much.

[pipfrankenstein]

hi i’m coming out as a huge frankenstein nerd. i love them more than my own family

[leafspiritz]

sometimes a family is you, your scary girlfriend, her rat-bird-son, and her terrible mangled hell-hound that comes from the depths of her soul 💜

[angelspearlheart]

One day I too will become a rusting piece of abandoned farm equipment laying in tall yellow grass

[marianismas]

List of GFMs I've been asked to share;

@fatma93-gaza: https://gofund.me/a5b6d4ae

link to post [€4,094 raised of €20,000 goal]

@safaakhatib: https://gofund.me/67b7fd56

link to post [€22,481 raised of €35,000 goal]

@abdelmutei: https://gofund.me/bdcea611

link to post [€7,930 raised of €50,000 goal]

@hins76178: https://gofund.me/7e81cf1d

link to post [$3,930 raised of $50,000 goal]

@abdalhadiaburas: https://gofund.me/96c9ecfa

link to post [$2,076 CAD raised of $65,000 goal]

@mahaahmad12: https://gofund.me/2adde3d1

link to post [£1,419 raised of £81,000 goal]

@anqar: https://gofund.me/bc721399

link to post [€15,270 raised of €20,000 goal]

@ahmedalnabeeh11: https://gofund.me/b477b817

link to post [€20,814 raised of €30,000 goal]

@gazaway13: https://gofund.me/3b8eb0e9

link to post [€13,340 raised of €40,000 goal]

Edit 8/14

@kefahfamily: https://gofund.me/9c326960

link to post [$560 raised of $40,000 goal]

@amlanqar: https://gofund.me/9d6e3b04

link to post [€6,903 raised of €50,000 goal]

@nedataya: https://gofund.me/63a8fb73

link to post [$3,365 raised of $29,500 goal]

@saveyouseffamily https://gofund.me/fefe93ba

link to post [€1,718 raised of €20,000 goal]

@ahmed-ziad: https://gofund.me/815dac1e

link to post [£9,096 raised of £30,000 goal]

@mahmoudkhalafff: https://gofund.me/483c5474

link to post [€21,774 raised of €30,000 goal]

@ghaziyounes1967: https://gofund.me/cdd5cffa

link to post [$3,152 raised of $50,000 goal]

@bshaeromars-blog: https://gofund.me/c0fb7b5f

link to post [$13,096 raised of $40,000 goal]

@aya2mohammed: https://gofund.me/62cf3a76

link to post [€23,877 raised of €50,000 goal]

@abedalazeiz: https://gofund.me/5ba0df8d

link to post [€26,668 raised of €90,000 goal]

@monashamali: https://gofund.me/3722ad57

link to post [£13,028 raised of £30,000 goal]

@sabrinaaxm: https://gofund.me/a08653d7

link to post [$1,717 AUD raised of $40,000 goal]

(40k AUD ~ 26.453k USD)

@falestine-yousef: https://gofund.me/19764c3d

link to post [$10,058 raised of $40,000 goal]

@mohamed-mikki: https://www.paypal.com/donate?campaign_id=EKWGJQPP5NNXC

link to post [$1,461 raised of $20,000]

@safaabed8: https://gofund.me/3aeaaae6

link to post [€26,668 raised of €90,000 goal]

@safaa18mero: https://gofund.me/b25cb4bf link to post [$7,668 raised of $75,000 goal]

@4-zien-yousef: https://gofund.me/f574ba7a

link to post [€13,287 raised of €23,000 goal]

@bilalassadabedrou: https://gofund.me/3ac67378

link to post [€7,134 raised of €80,000 target]

@musababed: https://gofund.me/e6a1e1e9

link to post [£3,760 raised of £8,000 target]

More to update soon!

@razan-2000: https://gofund.me/7e81cf1d

link to post [$3,980 raised of $50,000 target]

@saveomarfamily: https://www.paypal.com/donate?campaign_id=96SMNSAFVZWQY

link to post [$0 raised of $25,000]

(the account isn't vetted yet, if anyone could verify I would appreciate it)

@tawfikblog: https://gofund.me/21417d56 (not vetted)

link to post [$707 raised of $18,680 goal]

@palestinianhadeel: https://gofund.me/b325e600

link to post [€4,817 raised of €20,000 goal]

@jody-family: https://gofund.me/ac2bb9ca

link to post [£1,942 raised of £20,000 goal]

@noor-alanqar

link to post [€19,111 raised of €40,000 goal]

@somiaamen: https://gofund.me/0ef44b59

link to post [$1,515 raised of $100,000 target]

@hanaa987: https://gofund.me/86a04937

link to post [£9,098 raised of £20,000 target]

@mohammedaldeeb: https://gofund.me/71b5dfcf

link to post [€36,318 raised of €55,000 target]

@fatensama12: https://gofund.me/b4d9068c

link to post [$14,160 raised of $50,000 target]

@hayanahed: https://gofund.me/9d39cd08

link to post [€70,126 raised of €100,000 target]

@firas-salem: https://gofund.me/38c2b03f

link to post [€34,422 raised of €65,000 target]

@save-hijazi-family2: https://gofund.me/b90ba380

link to post [€10,095 raised of €20,000 target]

@mona-mohamed93: https://gofund.me/70b5e9d2

link to post [€2,882 raised of €185,300 target]

[pyunyrage]

[kikivoka]

oomf, what will she write ?

[itwasntaphase]

Strange Sensations I crave:

1: taking my spine out and wringing it real good so it cracks every area and helps the pain (fuck scoliosis)

2: taking my eyes out and putting them into a glass of cold water (refreshing for dry eye)

3: Take my skin off and give it a very good scrubbing and moisturizing (no more itchy eczema)

4: taking my brain out and deep cleaning it then soaking it in an ice bath (I'm convinced this would cure my migraines)

5: Scratching behind my eyes (they are often itchy)

7: eating my many pica cravings without it causing issues (i.e. sand, foaming soap, decorative bar soap)

8: taking my muscles apart and soaking each one in a warm bath and then giving it a deep massage (bye bye achy body)

9: Pulling my sinuses out and rinsing them thoroughly (I think it would help my allergies)

10: removing my bottom jaw to give me a break from my TMJ for a while (self-explanatory)

Please reblog this and add yours so I know I'm not crazy in wanting these things. My therapist says these are symptoms from my OCD so that's fun.

[blackrosesandwhump]

Nathaniel's Bane, Part 1

Whumpril Day 13: Angry Tears

CW: Gothic illness, fever whump, implied self-harm

Cold silver moonlight pierces the gloom of Nathaniel’s bedroom as the boy lies awake, tossing and turning from the discomfort in his chest.

It’s happening again, the same way it always happens: pain that starts small in his sternum, radiating through his body and bringing with it a weakness that he can never shake, an illness from which he never gets well. A few days ago, he could traverse the garden, albeit slowly, walk to the library and back, even sit outside in the bright sunlight for an hour at a time without his body failing him. Now, he can’t even leave his bed.

And it’s all because of the—

A gentle knock interrupts his thoughts, followed by a low voice calling his name. “Master Nathaniel?”

He doesn’t answer, but the door opens anyway, revealing the figure of the doctor, slightly disheveled, concern deepening the shadows on his face.

“You’re unable to sleep,” he observes, opening his bag. “Let me take your temperature again.” He helps the boy sit up and slides the thermometer under his tongue. Nathaniel closes his eyes and lets the doctor do his work. Not that it will help. Nothing does.

A couple of angry tears bead in the corners of his eyes and slide down his hot cheeks. If only he could remove the thing from his chest, get it out of him, rip it away and hurl into in the sea.

“You definitely have a fever. This will help bring it down.” The doctor holds a small vial to Nathaniel’s lips. He drinks it automatically, recoiling at the bitter taste as if taking it for the first time, not the thousandth. A wave of weakness washes over him, and he sinks back into the pillows, another tear tracking down into his already-damp temple.

He feels rather than sees the doctor examine him with a sad, pitying look. “I’ll come check on you again. Try to sleep, if you can.” The door closes with a soft thump, and Nathaniel lies alone again under the cold white moon.

To his fevered imagination, it looks like an eye, boring into him with an unblinking, terrifying stare, as if a gargantuan monster on high is observing the tiny, sick human on earth. Nathaniel rolls over, away from the eye, and the pain in his chest lessens just a little. His right hand, curled under the pillow, touches something hard and cornered. The dagger his father gave him. He forgot he put it there before night fell, before the pain in his body started afresh.

After a while, his tossing and turning gives way to shallow, fevered dreams, but not before an idea edges into Nathaniel’s mind.

Maybe there is a way to remove the devil’s stone from his body after all.

[creekbed-burial]

♡ Roadtrip Churches ♡

[smoker00182726271615262]

Angellashes

[panthermouthh]

A Cornstalk Fiddle

(Part 1/?)

And here they are! The first three pages of a fan comic, based on @notbecauseofvictories brain altering fic 'A Cornstalk Fiddle'. Read more below if you're interested in where this comic came from and where it’s going :))

I've continuously returned to notbecauseofvictories’s writing over the years— if I ever feel lost in my own story telling when it comes to comics, poems or prose, notbecauseofvictories is one of those authour's whose work always reignites a creative spark in me, and I just wanted to make my own tribute to one of my favourite stories <33

I've had this all visually planned out in the back of my mind for a year now, and finally drafted the storyboards this summer. I can’t promise a timeline of when the next pages will be posted, hopefully over the next few months, but I’m planning on doing this whole scene and it should come to about ten. I hope you guys enjoy them and tell me what you think!

[spookysalem13]

I'm really not looking forward to this 🫠 I'm sure all my alt and my chronic illness, especially POTS friends can understand why this is going to be unpleasant 🙃