#god i need to make that drink so bad
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omg please what's the cocktail book
trying to pour wine in libations to the gods , but i just spill it on my nuts.
#ask#it is called nectar of the gods! by liv albert and thea engst#the mythos in it is very cursory and weirdly put lol#but as an atreides apologist i forgive the weird agamemnon entry because they titled the drink as agamemnon’s bath water#god i need to make that drink so bad#I JUST REMEMBERED SO ADDING TO THESE TAGS MONTHS AFTER#there was an achilles themed drink at a restaurant i went to a while back#it was so fucking good#idk exact measurements but#bombay sapphire gin#cointreau#skinos mastiha#lemon#raspberry#and mint#that shit was so good man#if someone can nail those ingredients in a drink please dm me the measurements#i will kiss u with so much passion
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i'm sick in the head
[screenshots taken by @/drusoona]
#dmc#dmc5#dmc vergil#vergil sparda#ooohh he makes me sick#i need to go to the seaside and stare at jpegs of him for hours#its been almost a year and he continues to rattle around my mind palace#he is sitting on the throne drinking a capri sun#real talk: i have so many actual comprehensible thoughts about him and if anyone wants to talk about vergil dmc to me please for the love o#god#i need more dmc friends so bad. pelase.#nai.txt
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i’ve never been as angry on behalf of a character as i am for sam winchester
#currently thinking about season four and five. absolutely fuckibg mental#the world literally reshapes itself around him to prove him wrong#its all framed as God. Sam was so stupid and selfish and reckless for drinking demon blood. He just liked the power of it and he chose a#DEMON over DEAN.#but. that’s not the story they tell in s4.#like even aside from every single other complexity. Sam is literally right. he has ZERO WAY of knowing that killing lilith is the final seal#AND DEAN DOESNT KNOW TJAT EITHER. like sam is literally right he can kill lilith and he does kill lilith. dean wants lilith dead just as#much. sam’s cardinal sin is disobeying dean and then the world flips around on him and plot twist sam and dean were both wrong all along and#killing lilith is what will bring back lucifer :)#but. it’s not framed like that either. it’s framed like SAM BROUGHT BACK LUCIFER BY KILLING LILITH WHILE HIGH ON DEMON BLOOD#dean you wanted to kill lilith too?????????#but. doesn’t matter dean despite being mostly motivated by jealous anger is retroactively proven to be Right#and sam is retroactively proven to be Wrong. he is bad#i just. jesus. sam’s not evil ever. he’s hardly even that fucking morally grey#and he still thinks there’s something wrong with him that he’s a freak that he’s inherently evil and needs to be purified#why?? cause of something fucked up that happened to him when he was a baby#and because he’s disobeyed his father and his brother and been angry at awful things that have happened to him#makes me feel fucking insane actually#no wonder narrative frames sam as evil no wonder he’s inherently marked as Bad by the forces in supernatural like even on a meta level#in supernatural gods just another shitty father. embodiment of the familial patriarch. and from sam’s very first moment on the show he’s in#opposition to that he’s ran away from john and he argues with dean. therefore he is evil#i don’t think my words r really making sense right now but. fucking hell#and sam is so swamped in guilt all of season five and he just fucking accepts that everything bad is his fault#and he gets tortured in the cage to save the fucking world and it’s STILL not enough. not to appease his own guilt and not to appease deans#anger at him. dean is still throwing his perceived violations back at him in like season nine!!#and whenever he tries to get out it’s treated as yet another Sin. narrative acts like sam thinking dean was dead and having a life outside#of hunting is The Worst Thing He Ever Did#worst sin sam ever commits in the eyes of the show is disobedience. Absolutely awful actually#spn#sam winchester
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One of the best Voyager scenes to indicate Tuvok & Neelix's dynamic and how I think Tuvok is just as if not more 'annoying'(positive) than Neelix is when Neelix pours Tuvok a fresh squeezed glass of a fruit juice blend and Tuvok's like (paraphrased) "I don't want to drink this." and Neelix is like "Can you please try it?" and Tuvok's like "I don't want to, you're really bad at this sort of thing. It's going to taste bad." and Neelix says that Ensign XYZ said she LOVED it, she even had a second glass! And Tuvok says Ensign XYZ could drink poison without a second thought and Neelix is like "Tuvok could you please just TRY it? Just try a little SIP of it PLEASE??" and Tuvok sighs and rolls his eyes and sniffs it before taking a sip and it turns out he loves it. Turns out it tasted good actually. And then after all that Neelix tries to talk to him over eggs (which he's again cooking fresh for him) and Tuvok tells him he doesn't wanna hear "the life history of his breakfast." Absolutely insufferable this man I would have burned his eggs on PURPOSE!!!!
#I love Neelix so much and I think he and Tuvok are very funny together - irritating4irritating#People say 'Neelix is so pushy with Tuvok!' and you know what? I think Tuvok can handle it. I think maybe he does need to be pushed -#down a flight of stairs. (he's my favorite character and he's so annoying...TUVOK!!!!!)#Tuvok: -kicking and screaming- I don't want to drink the juice!!! It's poison!!! You're trying to poison me!!!!!!!!!#Neelix: Can you please drink the juice. The fresh squeezed juice I made for you Mr. Vulcan??? Can you please???#Tuvok: Fine but if I die it's your fault. If I die from the poison you're FORCING me to drink it's on y- Oh this is delicious actually.#and don't tell me 'Neelix didn't make it SPECIFICALLY for Tuvok' bc I know he didn't but he says#'I'll start squeezing that second glass!' after Tuvok finishes his sip so he IS freshly squeezing it#Neelix: -makes Tuvok fresh squeezed juice-#Tuvok: Are you trying to poison me???#Neelix: -talks to Tuvok while making his eggs-#Tuvok: Can you be quiet???#<- TUVOK!!!!!!!! I'M GONNA KILL YOU EHHEHEHEH <3#Tuvok is the most annoying guy ever bc he doesn't care about what people think and is a snob with a lowkey superiority complex#vs Neelix is perceived as annoying (post his relationship with Kes) bc he cares a lot about being useful and helping the crew and sometimes#is too pushy because of that but listen...I think Neelix is sweet and genuinely trying his best - after the Kes plotline with him ends I#really don't find him objectionable. Just chatty & a bit overbearing maybe Meanwhile Tuvok !!!#Meanwhile Tuvok!!!!!!!!! HHEHEHHE#st voyager#star trek voyager#I think they should have done more with Neelix thinking the crew of Voyager were spoiled - specifically how Tuvok acts Like That sometimes#little lord Tuvok. oH SORRY...for DEIGNING to speak while preparing your eggs your HIGHNESS!!#I think people do a disservice to Tuvok by not talking more about how he's kind of a hardass and a snob v_v also a disservice to Janeway#indirectly bc her bestie is kind of a hardass and a snob and what does that say about her??#I also wish Neelix kept up a bit of that 'these people are crazy and also so soft oh my god shut up about the food being bad - we're trying#to SURVIVE!!! Eat the Leola Root!!' from the earlier seasons...I like when he shows he has a bit of bite#It's just funny and interesting that Janeway isn't friends with Tuvok bc he's 'not like other Vulcans' - she's friends with the most#Vulcany Vulcan ever and I love that for them.#CRIMINAL that we don't ever get any in-depth insight into their friendship#Tuvok
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Peter Vincent you are the Baddest Girl around
song is "Bad Girl" by Usher
be the change you want to see in the world. if you want more david tennant as peter vincent edits, miss an entire night of sleep making one yourself, i guess.
#god i need him as a trophy husband so fucking bad y'all have no clue#it's a wee bit messy but that's alright bc this is my first time ever making an edit and i was working with beginner tools#you know you're obsessed with a character when you break into a whole new medium just for them#i've had this edit in my brain for like a month and it feels to good to get it out of there and on my screen#bc i rediscovered this song around the same time i first watched fright night 2011 so i can't hear it without thinking of her <3#ignore how i missed an entire night of sleep making it in an adhd-med-induced hysteria.#gotta love artistic interpretation bc i can listen to this misogynistic song about getting a woman off a pimp and fully be like#''actually this is about my special little guy who sucks and i love :)''#david tennant#peter vincent#fright night#fright night 2011#anton yelchin#cw smoking#cw drinking#cw blood#fan edit#running my mouth#made this with my hands#video
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Feeling very Ascension by Gorillaz ft Vince Staples at 2:18
#i need to solve a puzzle or some shit. god. fuck.#i cant concentrate on anything i cant fall asleep i cant stay asleep i cant stay awake i cant wake up on time#i hate depression 😒 and all the other things wrong with me yknow#i need to do something like. good for me. but its so damn hard to drag myself into doing that too#brain. stop being so foggy. please.#im even like. im eating im drinking water. i could probably like do some sort of exercise but everything makes me so tired.....#like even a walk yknow? i do my shift at work and im at 3% battery. i dont. i dont know what to do man#and i dont even wanna die about it???? im actively NOT suicidal for once#like are you kidding me??? ive been suicidal for like over a decade and for once#my brain is still popping up like have you considered killing yourself? 🤔 but im Genuinely not swayed by it at all#which is weird. and probably good. but now i just feel like. numb#stuck. stagnant. foggy. can we PLEASE cut through this fog and have some meaningful brain functions for a little bit. brain. cmon#i dont wanna die but i *do* wanna sleep for like. three days#i want a week off where i have NOTHIN to do#genuinely nothing to do. chores are done work is on pause i need nothing creeping in at the edges thinkin bout#ohhhhh you should be doing this instead..........youre wasting your time........do a task.....#but i cant i cant do a task. i cant. and its so frustrating and i feel bad about it#id feel much worse about it if my BRAIN wasnt as foggy as fucking SAN FRANCISCO#and i keep trying like. healthy ways of ''feeling something'' like hobbies i like or yummy food#nothin. does fuckin nothin. i get off and it gives me a Little bit of clarity Maybe. like#no wonder bad coping mechanisms happen yknow??? its an absolute fucking miracle i havent taken up smoking#anyway. i need to go to bed. tomorrows gonna be a long day. if you feel so inclined send me mental love or something. im fuckin tired folks.
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What's the crafting dead?
A really REALLY old minecraft roleplay series created by sgcbarbierian, a bunch of other mc youtubers were in it as well, like aphmau, redvacktor, yourpalross, etcetera.
It's exactly what it sounds like, youtubers roleplaying an apocalypse in minecraft, but it's not technically a typical zombie apocalypse because the zombies were created through human experiments done by..... some scientist villain
also there's a cannibal guy
It's absolutely nothing like mys/mcd, everyone in it plays just themselves as a character, like Red the cannibal cult leader, or like Mithzan Max that one weird guy who's immune to the zombies and just wants to play uno with someone, Jess even plays as JESS and not some version of Aphmau.
Uhh more rambling in the tags idk
#theres also original characters. not just youtubers! like.. bobby from supernatural..... is a character in.. the series. ....yeah#i personally love it#cuz i grew up on it. but some people in it are actually human trash (sky.) so its iffy overall#but red and dr ross make it worth it. i also love the main four!! the overall plot is interesting as well#if you ignore the garbage people in it. (sky. jin. ew gross)#asks#ask#i do recommend it actually. shockingly. its scarily good for what it is#it has crazy rewrite potential. and its easy to just write out the.. bad people :/#idk. im tired#im on my second energy drink today. i cant be thinking about tcd rn cuz then ill think about the wild potential it has and I'll rewrite it#like as an original series based on the rp. and i dont have the commitment for that rn... but god..... god do i love it#i need..... to laayy down#huhghuhggfvbb nnhg#jnbgf yeah uhhh SNHFHKG feel free to ask more but bro. no promises cuz im. unwell
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this whole epilogue is just a little treat for me oh my god. "familiar faces arrive in simulanka" does not even begin to cover it
#personal stuff#thorn plays genshin#literally gasped aloud seeing kaeya and jean#the besties........ hi.... i missed you guys so much. i'll cry#why'd the eng add that line in for kaeya. sounds like he just says ''thank you [?] miss''. why do they make him flirty he's just being nice#alice inviting the knights to simulanka once everything has calmed down... kaeya making jean take a break... what if i cry#kaeya i'm sorry . if it were up to me i never would have let you drink literal magic ink#COLLEI'S HERE TOO YIPPEE#we need to stop sneaking up on her. i feel bad whenever she gets scared :(#AWWW. she sounds happy to hear from him and wants to go say hello................... growth from her voicelines omg#AND MONA'S HERE TOO. WOOO#so glad we get to see her with the barbeloth stuff#i love when they use her idle animation in the middle of conversations it's neat :] also it using klee's constellation...#FISCHL TOO???? HII.#wanderer seeing fischl who absolutely does not remember him: oh god#ALBEDO AND KLEEEE. OH MY GOD.#klee saying mini durin is her big brother wAUUUGH.#alice just inviting her whole extended family [mondstadt + collei] is so so so so sweet. oh my god#HARD LEFT TURN?? HELLO??#albedo popping up to be like yeah that prophecy that durin will come back to life is true i've been studying it.#HELLO?????#REALLY interesting stuff. cannot believe they stuck this in a limited time event. Again#not sure if durin really will be the one coming back to life?they'd have to remodel all of dragonspine if so. or get him a new body#but yeah it just says ''rhinedottir's child'' will come back to life that could be any one of her creations right?#anyway we didn't get a fontaine event with albedo visiting elynas but this is a suitable substitute. i liked it a lot
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Lies from the main blog because i would so become an alcoholic given the chance. I wouldn't pick vodka either for my beverage of choice, I'd pick the fucking handmade pretentious ass ciders and champagne they serve at exhibition openings.
#it's funny because i have been given the chance multiple times#but i didn't take them because like. okay yeah i get drunk while I'm alone. but what then???#i have too good of a relationship with my dad and then he'd stop by and see that I'm either drunk or hungover#that'd send our relationship down the drain in an instant#i need like a week where i don't see *anyone*#(not because i plan on being drunk for the entire week but just so we're safe yk. or like 3 days or sth.)#oh my god this sucks i wanna try alcohol so so so bad but that wouldn't make me different from any kf the other shitheads my age#I'd join the majority rhat has tried alcohol#and i don't think that “oh but i was drinking alone and not some cheap ass vodka and i wasn’t doing stupid shit” is an acceptable loophole#(acceptable to me)
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forcing myself to "eat protein" and "be responsible" after once again encountering a week long period of all my muscles hurt so bad and are so weak despite doing the same thing they always do assuming without checking that it was probably because im eating mostly coffee and plain untoasted bread in small quantities. and its not even a whey bread or 100% whole wheat, ive been trying to use up my bread flour/whole wheat blend (i dumped them in the bucket together, maybe on accident ? unclear) so its just that with whatever else i threw in. spent $6 on the only yogurt in the store that had at least 5 grams of protein per 1/4 cup, which is still very little, only to get home and finally google what the symptoms of protein deficiency are. they are not that. those are the symptoms of Who Fucking Knows, As Always
#i dont even like yogurt...#god the food situation is so bad#so it turns out i can do one of the following--but badly and it takes more than 100% of my energy and is miserable and untenable long term#and involves injuring myself to do it: school. work. taking care of stuff around the house. taking care of myself.#i can do ONE.#i also dont get to pick because obviously i have to work#so feeding myself (even like making a bowl of cereal or eating a granola bar) is so impossibly difficult that i can only really do it#at night when high and finally able to feel hunger#and even then its still incredibly difficult and i usually get as far as cutting a slice of bread and then giving up and eating it plain#most of the actual meals i eat are because my roommates are usually kind enough to make enough dinner for 3#but i also have very weird and frequently changing dietary needs that i have not communicated 2 anyone so i cant necessarily actually eat i#have cooked some and made sandwiches a few times but its very clear i am borrowing from tomorrows spoons....#i ran out of the ensure a bit ago and i will get more although none of the stores nearby sell it#but i absolutely cannot afford to live off it#have luckily found that if i just drink one in the morning it staves off the majority of the nonstop random nausea attacks#so a 12 pack would last a lot longer but then its like. so now i need to figure out the eating thing again#cant win etc etc#augh. anyway. complaining over#disordered eating#chronic illness
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trying to decipher if the overwhelming dread & Thoughts are cause of the state of the world or cause i need a shower.
vent post in the tags. idk. do whatever 👍
#sorry bros im about to ventpost in these mf tags 👍#im so fucking tired man. im already suicidal to begin with but the Everything happening is making it Worse. Yippe Yahoo Hooray.#therapy in a week though so ive got that at least.#this is the worst time of year for shit to go south.but Uh Oh saying that makes me feel like a selfish fuckass because other people -#- have it worse. like. god fucking damn. i get Extra suicidal around september -> march range sure. but other people are literally suffering#like as we fucking speak. and ive done fuckall to help cause i dont know HOW to help. but thats not a fucking excuse#im just being comfortable in my lazy ass depression spiral cause im a selfish fucking prick. “i cant spare the energy to vett things”#other people are fucking dying and im over here like “noo im too tiwed :( i cant do anyfing so im not gona do anyfing cuz im wazy and tiwed”#what the fuck is wrong with me lmao. knowing me im not gona change shit anyway despite fucking complaining about it cause im just. fucking#Like That.#idk. i was reblogging some of those “hold in there dont kill yourselves” posts cause like. yk. suicide bad or fucking whatever. but someone#on this site said something along the lines of “ok but how many people reblogging/posting these told jews to kill themselves” and like.#i dont know. i dont fucking know dude. so i guess im not reblogging Those anymore.#theres bigger issues out there and here i am focusing on some queer people who might kill themselves. idk. i should just join them yk#cause i never fucking focus on the bigger shit cause “i dont know how” and “i dont want to make things worse so i just wont do anything” so#im not doing fuckall other than just being part of the fucking problem here.#i should probably just delete social media for a while and see from there.#or just fucking drink about it thats the other option. its worked for me before (lie) so i may as well do it again am i right#im sorry i never like. boost gofundmes or fundraisers and shit i just.#i dont have a fucking excuse. im just a lazy fucking bastard in my own stupid fucking comfort circle.#“oh no seeing that people are dying makes me uncomforyable :(” ok well people are fucking dying you self absorbed douchebag. why cant you#get off your stupid fucking ass and do something. get a job so you can fucking help people or *something#its not like you have to pay rent and shit.#<- all about myself. cause yk. self centered douchbag. hooray.#i dont pay rent and i dont have to pay for my own food. i still live with my parents. im fucking useless to society so i may as well get a#job and send the money i dont fucking need to somrone who DOES need it. but here i am.#in.my stupid fucking bed til noon cause “the world is scary and jobs are hard :(”#its fucking retail. retail isnt as fucking hard as like. construction and shit but here i am anyway “unable” to do shit.#i fucking could if i just fucking ballsed up and put up with shit. but no. here i fucking am going “nooo i should just kill myself instead”#vent post
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so it turns out it was actually never that serious
#the exam literally went fine what the fuck just happened i feel like i just hallucinated that#like im not one of those people that go 'omg i did soooo badly :(' just to come out with top grades if i say it's going to shit#then it's becuase i genuinely wholeheartedly believe it#and my headspace before this exam was the worst it's been in MONTHS like i havent felt that bad for an exam since first year#and i sat down opened the paper and. remembered everything. like i literally just Knew the answers#im not saying ive passed bc am i fuck about to jinx it and i was still riding mainly blind bc i have NO idea where that knowledge came from#but at the very least there was a 35 marker that i KNOW i aced like i could picture the exact lecture slides it wanted me to discuss#and i had all of them memorised so at the very least ive got like. 30 marks. which is enough for me to pass the module#bc this exam is only weighted 75% and with my marks from the other 25% i only needed like 20 marks to pass this exam#which... makes it even more embarrassing that i failed it the first time but whatever!!!!#oh my god im so glad that's done im so happy IM FREE#just been in the kitchen dancing around to my little tunes and texting my friends <3#im meeting up with one of them when she gets off work at 5 and we're going for drinks#so ive got until then to nap and chill and then ill go to the shop and get us some food and wine#and she's gonna come here for a bit & then we'll go. like actually look at me. im having people over at MY HOUSE im going out to buy us WIN#im literally a functioning adult living independently who IS she a misty memory#alas i do only have £23 in my account so this is gonna be such a slay seeing how i make that stretch for a night out#i acc could budget for england when it comes to alcohol i think like the way i manage to have a good funky time with MINIMAL funds#is downright impressive. it's a skill idc what you say#hella goes to uni
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Just saw the popular vote results... yeah, no more playing nice. I need Kamala Harris to beat the shit out of Donald Trump like Wendy did to Cartman in that one South Park episode.
#tw politics#Supposedly the election is not over till December or someone concedes#Kamala#sweety#do. not. fucking. concede#There's still a chance#a very tiny chance but I need to remain delusional right now so I don't loose my fucking mind#But yeah#I'm not a massive South Park fan but I watch that episode when I need to feel something#I need to see that woman beat the shit out of that orange fuck#I know it's violent and not the American way and blah blah blah#but gods#if she cannot win at least let me see her (or any other woman tbh) beat up Donald Trump so I have catharsis for the next four years#Fuck everyone who voted for Trump btw#The fuck do y'all hate women so much that you'd rather a felon elected?#Embarrassment of a fucking country I stg#i hate it here#FOR THE RECORD#AND FOR THE FBI AGENT IN MY LAPTOP#I am NOT suggesting violence or starting a riot#I'm making an (admittedly bad) joke to cope#We shouldn't beat up political candidates... at least in the same way we shouldn't drink on dry campuses#I need to go rewatch that episode#I need to feel something
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dont know if youve already seen this or not but you were in one of those youtube voice overs
https://youtu.be/mitzWloYb_Y?si=sGzCweWqizQa1uAF
i paused the video like ??? thats my mutual???
oh my god yeah, i haven't checked the link but im 99% sure it's the Don't Drink This one. some of my my irl friends actually found my tumblr through a video like that lmao. i got jumpscared so hard the first time one of those got recommended to me
#thats what i get for having a tumblr with the same name as my discord#my eternal love... my eternal shame... that fucking Drink#checked the link to make sure im not stupid and yep. Don't Drink That#god i need to make that again#its only bad if you let it sit for a while so if i make it in like. small glasses at a time it should be ok
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Idk maybe I'm just sensitive but I rlly hate when fanfics have shovel talks between characters that live and die for each other. Like sure let's let red haired shanks have a say about Roronoa 'died but came back' 'took Luffy's pain and burden' 'first mate' zoro bout weather or not he can kiss his captain. Yea
#sometimes its straight up infantilizing too which is not fun#i dont actually feel like. hostile i just find it really fucking funny. like those two are literally the sun and the moon. god and the king#of hell. the food and the drink the captain and the first mate the boss and his right hand man the boy and his bodyguard#the only one that was specifically sought out the pirate king and the ex demon pirate hunter. i could go on and on#background character no.23 dosnt need to say jack shit dw about it#psii.txt#this isnt just zolu specific tho. any ship where the intensity of their relationship is just so strong fits under here#maybe i just dont like the concept of shovel talks in general tho they always make me cringe and feel bad#anyway im going to sleep now thats enough fanfic i didnt vibe with for tonight
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I had caffeine earlier today that made me feel very jittery and on edge, so I was like ah yeah nah I won't bring a rb w me to the theater, I don't need anymore. Recovered from it, whatever. But then compulsively drank one while eating and I feel so out of my skin rn 😭😭😭 why did I do this to myself, I feel so aggravated
#i love rb#but god sometimes it rly kills me#either makes me super drowsy#or makes me feel like i want to rip my skin ofd#like just that super aggravated feeling yknow when nothing feels rigjt#i wanted to draw but#its not working cause i feel too frustrated 🫠#guess i wont be drawing Rüß as matthew mcconaughey LMFAO#i just keep like compulsively trying to sketch and its so bad#why did i drink that rb 😭😭 eternal suffering#its like i forgot how i felt earlier#and was like mmm i need a drink! why dont i drink the torture soda!#catie.rambling.txt
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