adriles

[adriles]

Getting really into telling guys that if the gods send them into my hands not one of their lives will be spared

[adriles]

this is basically how it is

[adriles]

pulled over for dragging hector’s corpse behind my chariot; asking cop to make the trojans stop wailing so loudly in grief because ''its loud'' ''it sucks''

[adriles]

You owe it to yourself and the gods to become 100ft tall and beat the shit out of a guy.

[adriles]

your crazy ass stupid abduction plot just fucked up the whole aegean world . hope it was worth the marriage. hope youre enjoying the war

[adriles]

before i exact my brutal revenge , i need to be dripped rhe fuck out

[adriles]

again the tides are red with blood as the best of the Daanan warriors lie by the ships wounded by arrow or spear. Thankfully Ill be staying in my hut, perfecting the Art of Grilling.

[adriles]

thanks all. together weve pierced straight through the trojan ranks, sending over 63 men directly to the House of Hades

[adriles]

i grow tired of the horrors and bloodshed of war . ddoes anyone want to go to wingstop with me instead

[adriles]

This is the last thing I ever wanted,this is the fate the gods have bound me to.

[adriles]

It pains my heart to hear that so many Danaans were injured or tragically perished in battle. While im saddened by the news, I never met most of them and i hate the ones i have , so i do not really give a shit

[adriles]

Why would i reveal to you my exact location the extent of my weaknesses? So the trojans can murder me easier ?? Anyways i will be outside the scaean gates in 30 minutes, please make sure there arent any archers around, lest they shoot me

[adriles]

Ok listen man, I'm just going to give it to you straight up. Not one Trojan, least of all the sons of Priam, will escape the point of my spear. Stop crying it is absolutely fucking embarrassing. Death and remorseless fate await me too, youre really not special.

[adriles]

my boy knows the ways of killing

[adriles]

Pre grievous loss : Yeah this sucks 👍 im packing my shit up tomorrow 👍 have fun fighting warriors for the sake of another man’s wife dipshit👍

Post grievous loss : Ἕκτορ μή μοι ἄλαστε συνημοσύνας ἀγόρευε: ὡς οὐκ ἔστι λέουσι καὶ ἀνδράσιν ὅρκια πιστά, οὐδὲ λύκοι τε καὶ ἄρνες ὁμόφρονα θυμὸν ἔχουσιν, ἀλλὰ κακὰ φρονέουσι διαμπερὲς ἀλλήλοισιν, ὣς οὐκ ἔστ᾽ ἐμὲ καὶ σὲ φιλήμεναι, οὐδέ τι νῶϊν ὅρκια ἔσσονται, πρίν γ᾽ ἢ ἕτερόν γε πεσόντα αἵματος ἆσαι Ἄρηα ταλαύρινον ��ολεμιστήν. παντοίης ἀρετῆς μιμνήσκεο: νῦν σε μάλα χρὴ αἰχμητήν τ᾽ ἔμεναι καὶ θαρσαλέον πολεμιστήν. οὔ τοι ἔτ᾽ ἔσθ᾽ ὑπάλυξις, ἄφαρ δέ σε Παλλὰς Ἀθήνη ἔγχει ἐμῷ δαμάᾳ: νῦν δ᾽ ἀθρόα πάντ᾽ ἀποτίσεις κήδε᾽ ἐμῶν ἑτάρων οὓς ἔκτανες ἔγχεϊ θύων.

[adriles]

my teen son has a very impressive resume, and his work experience consists of moderating a subreddit and committing violent war crimes

[adriles]

there is no problem you cannot solve by throwing a boulder at it