#feeling like I’m being replaced

[how-gross]

3:41pm — March 4, 2024

It feels like she’s getting bored of me.

She talks to her more. It makes sense, since she has most of her classes with her, unlike me. And the fact that she answers her calls more than I do. And unlike me, she actually knows more of the anime’s she watches than I do— I haven’t even made the effort to watch the anime’s she suggested I watch. I either didn’t have the time, or didn’t have the energy, or I was obsessed with something else and didn’t want to put that down to focus on something else. When you look at it like that, it does make sense as to why she would prefer to be around her more than me.

But at the same time, isn’t that a bit unfair? She is the same girl who isolated you, who talked about you and who called you out and kicked you out of the group chat back in Sophomore year. She was the one giving you death glares. And even with that, I stood by your side and supported you, I defended your honor and had your back. Me — who fears confrontation more than anything else in the world — confronted her and defended you against her. And now, you’re just besties? Why do I feel so left out? When my mom said, “I don’t know why you’re friends with that girl”, you say, “we forgive but we don’t forget”. But is that true? Is it really true?

But you guys do get along better, I have to admit. Better than you do with me. I see you laugh more when you’re around her, turn to her more than you do with me. Maybe I’m looking too far into things, but honestly, it makes sense as to why you’d rather be around her than with me. If you’d rather be with her than me, though, I want you to just say it instead of beating around the bush.

Why do I feel this way? I do everything I can for you. I will admit, it is unfair of me to not watch the stuff you like. I understand that that may be why you don’t want to chat with me that much anymore.

I let you vent about your family problems to me. I try to e by age as much as I can in order to make you happy; I listen to you, I validate your emotions, I offer advice, I even get angry on your behalf. But when I try to vent, all you say is, “yeah”, or, “[so and so] does the same thing / I deal with the same thing”, and then change the subject.

I don’t know what I want. My stomach hurts thinking about this, because we were best friends for 3+ years. We’re going to the same college together. I fear for my Birthday Dinner, because I’m afraid you’ll just talk to her the entire time. And I’m afraid if she’s not there, you’ll just be bored the entire time and not have fun. I don’t want to end our relationship, but I don’t wan to have a strained one where you don’t feel like you can be yourself. I don’t know. I just don’t know.

But if I’m being completely honest, I don’t really feel like I can trust you with myself. I don’t feel like I can be my true self around you, not like I actually know who that is. You claim to be my best friend, and I see you as my best friend, but I can’t help but walk on eggshells around you. I can’t help but read from a script when I talk to you. I can’t help but overanalyze the way I walk, the way I say things/ my speaking voice / my dialect, the way I react to things— everything, just to make sure you don’t judge me. You say you won’t ever judge me, but I see the way you judge others. Nobody’s perfect, I’m trying to learn that. But aren’t best friends supposed to trust one another? How can I trust you if I feel like this? Maybe I’m too sensitive, I really wish that I wasn’t— I wish that I could be as nonchalant and tough-hearted as you, but my heart is sticky and soft and fragile and easily broken. I don’t know where I got it from, but I wish it wasn’t me. I wish I could be anyone else, so people would actually like being around me.

[were-wolverine]

things in DC canon i’ll literally never get over

1. dick finds out batman replaced him as robin (without asking him) from the NEWSPAPER and simultaneously finds out bruce adopted a new kid without telling him (to make things worse: bruce didn’t even adopt dick)

2. dick finds out jason died from the newspaper (AGAIN? REALLY BRUCE?) and bruce had the fucking funeral WITHOUT HIM while he was still in space

[theotherbuckley]

Another reason Buck just thought he was a really good Ally is that Eddie literally took him on a whole ass romantic date but like as friends so how was he supposed to know.

[spidrboots]

xxx.

[bccksmarts]

That being said; I’ll be clearing out my mutuals and things, getting rid of inactive users and whatnot, nothing huge!! Gonna do a total redo of Hermione’s connections section on her about page and my affiliates — so if you’d like to keep anything, do let me know!!

I wanna make things better and I don’t want imposter syndrome coming back so I wanna get my shit straight 😤

[cuteniaarts]

The weight of the world is a heavy burden

Especially for a child

(Or, in slightly less dramatic terms – I imagine that the first of her past lives that Avatar Suiren [who is the Avatar after Aang instead of Korra in my AU, and also Ghazan and Ming-Hua’s daughter] gets to talk to is Yangchen, because she is too plagued by memories not her own [including Jetsun’s death, fun fact]. And Yangchen wouldn’t want another child to go through what she did on their own)

(Or maybe someone just needed an excuse to draw @katkastrofa’s latest obsession in a context that interests them as well, just in time to maybe cheer her up a little? You can’t prove anything)

[sarellathesphinx]

Constantly torn between genuinely loving the remake timeline’s depiction of Reeve and Cait and being immensely sad that pretty much all of my favorite lines of theirs from the original were totally excised or bc of plot developments will never be said

[peak-dumbass]

The statements “Larry Butz is much more interesting and important than fans give him credit for, especially at the end of AA1 as Phoenix and Miles’ childhood best friend & with his witness testimony saving Miles from a guilty verdict as well as at the end of AA3 where he is shown genuinely trying to improve himself as a person as Laurice Deauxnim” and “Larry Butz is hard for most people to stand because of his consistent weird moments in AA3 which, along with his constant failing-to-get-with-woman jokes throughout both games, can get annoying and borderline intolerable for some people” are not mutually exclusive.

I really am interested in Larry as a character but god it’s impossible for me to see him as anything other than comedic-relief-that-isn’t-comedic-nor-relieving, I really don’t feel bad when Phoenix is slightly rude towards him cuz I would act the same, if not worse

[blue-eli]

Ink October day twenty-nine: Wilder

To bewilder; to perplex.

Comparative form of wild: more wild.

[jitteryjive]

i need to remake my cup bros ref… both cup and human designs… it’s been almost a year(?) and i’ve developed the headcanons and i would like to share with the class!!! (i wrote thirty tags. Please help me)

[akkivee]

reformation bestiiiiiiiiiiiiieeeees

[bittersweetresilience]

for the ship ask game...

feligami 🦚🐉

HI SELKIE 💘💓💗 let’s go into my room and sit on my bed. i have snacks 🥰

What made you ship it?

i didn’t ship feligami until very recently, since i have strong feelings about arocoded félix, but while i was making amvs i saw how many times they held hands and my heart was swayed.

What are your favorite things about the ship?

i don’t ship it enough to have an answer for this question 🤣 get nina in here. nina has essays on essays about queerness and abuse recovery. i suppose my answer is the hand holding.

Is there an unpopular opinion you have on your ship?

i have strong feelings about this one too. they would not have kids ‼️ they would not get married ‼️ down with the nuclear family ‼️

(ship ask game)

[toomanyfandomsorkinafs]

My first friend in this fandom<3333 and one of the reasons I even got into the life series/Grian 🫶

@aggressivenesswhilecrying

[sockdooe]

Every time someone edits Keith in the black paladin armor an angel loses its wings.

[autistic-katara]

seeing ur beloved mutual reblogging some questionable shit (probably unintentionally) but not having the energy to argue or explain why </3

[calamitydaze]

long tag ramble below u have been warned