#fake relationship trope

[bachissidehoe]

pairing: isagi yoichi x bachira meguru

synopsis: #1 pro striker isagi yoichi made a huge mistake- he accidentally convinced the world he's not only gay, but also in a relationship with famous pop culture painter bachira meguru.

warnings: this fic contains smut, mentions of sexual assault, mentions of blood, descriptions of a toxic relationship, and manipulative tactics. mdni.

notes: this story picks up six years after blue lock ends, where isagi & bachira are 22 years old. the title and chapter names are based on Breathe Carolina's 2008 album: it's classy, not classic.

chapter list. [COMPLETE]

the introduction w.c. 2799

no vacancy w.c. 1971

show me yours w.c. 3118

the birds and the bees w.c. 2814

classified w.c. 4079

gossip w.c. 3446

that's classy w.c. 3147

diamonds w.c. 2448

you wish w.c. 5196

lovely w.c. 4221

put some clothes on w.c. 3144

[thenewfantasticfran]

Y'all ever noticed how in a lot of gay coming out movies or novels, the whole objective is to hide the fact that they're in a relationship?

And then there's straight heterosexual romance tropes over here being like:

"We gOttA PrEtEnD wE ArE F***inG sO wE caN WiN A frEe trIp tO HaWAii!!"

Like I'm not the only one who's noticed right?

[marshmallow--3]

What sucks is if you add sex into this, suddenly it's prostitution

[bookishwum]

He turned back, meeting my gaze, a disarming openness in his eyes. Right there, in that exact moment, I did a terrible, terrible thing.

I fell in love with my boss.

— Faking Ms. Right, Claire Kingsley

[cobragardens]

I adore the Fake Relationship trope but it's really hard to do with Aziraphale and Crowley bc their whole deal is pretending not to have a relationship. This idea feeds my longing with its potential.

*

how do people watch canon license enjoyer, human activity connoisseur, and rules anxiety haver aziraphale collect his driving license and gun license and take lessons in french etc and then go ‘he’s above human things like getting married’. he’d have his marriage certificate framed over the mantelpiece.

He’s truly the opposite of people who say “it’s just a piece of paper.” If there was a long arduous application/test you had to do for marriage he’d be extra into it. Not that I think this has/would happen in canon but I think there should be a whole category of fake relationship fics where aziraphale asks Crowley to get married just cause he wants to add the marriage license to his collection of licenses he has and they both pine while being married

[googoogagahearteyes]

Just a statistic I’m interested in finding out :)

Like for me it would depend on who it was etc etc but overall still a yes bc it would be funny yknow

[dynamic-power]

The four of them are sitting in Robin's living room watching a movie when Robin's mom pops her head in and says that the pizza had arrived. Steve and Robin stand from the couch immediately, pushing and shoving at each other to get to the kitchen first. Nancy and Eddie stay behind, heads tilted together as they talk and giggle in hushed tones.

By the time Nance and Ed have made it to the kitchen, Robin and Steve have made it back to the couch. Robin's mom joins them after a moment, sitting in one of the chairs they've pulled in from the dining table to seat all five of them.

As Robin reaches over to try and pluck a piece of pepperoni from Steve's pizza, Steve catches Robin's mom watching them with a fond smile and twinkling eyes.

Steve knows that look. That's the look of a mother who thinks Steve is the perfect boyfriend to their daughter.

He spots a flash of curls before the couch sinks down beside him. He can divert Robin's mom's attention and show her that he and Robin really are just friends. Nancy won't mind. She'll understand and play along, so he lets his hand drift out to grip her thigh. "Hey, baby, do you think -"

Only his palm doesn't land on the cotton of Nancy's skirt. It touches rough denim instead.

He should snatch his hand back, should apologize and explain, but as his eyes meet the wide, startled gaze of Eddie, he freezes.

Eddie's eyes flash up to Robin, then to her mom, and Steve realizes that Eddie has understood. A warm palm slides onto his and dexterous fingers flip his hand over and twine with his own. "Think what, sweetheart?"

Gooseflesh rushes up his arm as Eddie's rough thumb begins to stroke his hand, and he swallows down a potentially embarrassing noise. "Um. Do you think your uncle would mind if you stayed with me tonight?"

Eddie smiles at him, wide and bright and disarming. "No, I don't think he'd mind. Parents out of town again?"

Robin's mom has diverted her gaze back to the TV, but Robin and Nancy are now staring at them with wide eyes. He ignores them. "Yeah."

"Big, spooky house too much for you?" Before Steve can reply, Eddie shifts closer to him and settles against Steve's side. "I'll protect you, sweetheart."

They watch the rest of the movie that way. Steve finds it a little odd to finish eating using his wrong hand, but for some reason, he can't bring himself to let go of Eddie.

[technoschnauzer]

I agree people seem to be getting too unrealistic with their ideas of “Curly could’ve done more” But I hate seeing “what was he supposed to do?” cause like- Stay with Anya(physically and metaphorically). Don’t run away from her and leave her alone to ‘fix’ things(she’s pregnant, she’s been raped there is no changing that) by talking with Jimmy.

Literally in my opinion all Curly really had to do to show he cared was stay there with her. Comfort her. Don’t say you can fix it, don’t say you can Fix Jimmy. Don’t say you can fix this situation and imply it can be made right, don’t imply you can make Jimmy better.

Of course there were other things he could do. He could apologize for not noticing sooner. He could give her something else to use as a weapon(hell a fucking PEN can be used as a weapon).

People saying there’s not much he could do are right, but Curly didn’t believe that. Even though he seemed to believe Anya he still tried to reconcile it with his view of Jimmy and believed he could do something.

If he’d stayed he could’ve calmed and comforted Anya, then talked with her. They could’ve made a plan together to try to avoid Jimmy finding out. Alllll he had to do was stay instead of running off to find his best friend.

[lucylichtenweg]

Me: oh no another fanfic with the same plot like the last one!

What I mean: give me more. I need more. I do not care I know the plot. Becuse I know what the plot is I need this. Again. And again. This is my life now. A part of me. Give. Me. More.

[yellowbrokenblue]

„Just… Pretend.”

summary: in which harry convinces you to spend your summer in cape cod with his parents as his ‘girlfriend.’ but everything is just pretend, your not actually his girlfriend and you never have wanted to be his girlfriend, you’ve never seen him as more than harry styles, the singer… but by the end of the summer will that change?

tropes (so far) : fake dating

part one

“It’s just for one weekend.” He pleaded, “Then you can go back to hating me. You never even have to talk to me again, I don’t care.”

You sigh, your head falling backwards with a groan. You did not want to do this at all, but he’d been persistently asking you for days.

“C’mon, please?”

You roll your eyes, “You’re on a date with a new girl every week, I’m sure any of them would be up for it.”

“I can’t just take anyone to my parent’s place.”

“Why not? Or how about you just tell them you’re not seeing anyone right now? They won’t care.”

“I just need you to come, alright? I’ll owe you one, I promise.”

“Why me? There’s a million other people you could take, besides I’ve already met your parents at a show, they’ll never believe we’re seeing each other.”

“And they really liked you!”

“There’ll be a ton of other people that they like too, Harry. Choose anyone else.”

“I can’t.” He sighs.

“You can.”

“I can’t.” He repeats.

You look at him with tired eyes, awaiting his explanation. You’d been over this a hundred times, you had no interest in pretending to be his girlfriend while he visited his parents over the summer.

“I already told them we’re together.” He says quietly, avoiding eye contact.

“What?” You scoff, “You’ve gotta be joking.”

“They just… They met you at the show, and they really did seem to like you, and they kept going on and on about how they want me to find someone who makes me happy and stuff and I shut them up by saying we’re together…”

“You’re unbelievable.” You say, annoyed.!

The fact he’d been telling his parents ridiculous lies without even telling you about it, when said lies actually involved you had pissed you off.

Harry’s parents were lovely, and a producer on his latest album you’d met them a couple times at shows- Especially during the LA residence where you and his parents sat through the concerts in a VIP booth. His mum was lovely, always smiling and knew every single lyric. She told you that she was in Harry’s 0.5% of top listeners on Spotify last year.

You thought that was cute.


You couldn’t relate though, 5 Seconds of Summer were your top Spotify artist- Harry could never find out about that.

“They’ve been asking for me to take you to the beach house for months-“

“Months?!” You interrupt, “How long have you been telling them we’re together?”

He shrugged, “Since the end of the Forum residency?”

“Harry that was SIX months ago!” You yell, “I can’t pretend to be in a six month relationship with you, that’s ridiculous.”

He sits down on the couch, hugging a pillow.

“Yes you can. You practically know everything about me already. We spent every day of the tour together.”

“Everything about you in a career aspect.”

“Everything in general.” Harry corrects, “Sometimes I think you know more about me than I do.”

“I don’t. You’re just saying this because you’re convincing yourself that this ridiculous idea will actually work.”

“Name my first pet.”

“What?” You question. He was being stupid. There is no way you’d ever be able to spend two weeks with his parents over the summer, it was never going to work. It was a recipe for disaster.

“C’mon. You know the answer.”

He just kept staring at you. He wasn’t giving up. The longer you stayed silent the more intense his stare got. When he began to raise his eyebrows you’d given up.

“Max.” You mutter quietly, unimpressed with this whole game he was playing.

“And what am I allergic to?”

“Marshmallows, but you eat them anyway.”

Harry was grinning, and it was pissing you off. He was winning and he knew it.

“My favourite Christmas song?”

You rolled your eyes, “Christmas lights by Coldplay, but you tell everyone that it’s Merry Christmas Everyone because it’s a classic.”

Harry was giving you a ‘I told you so’ look. He wasn’t going to quit until you agreed to pretend to be his girlfriend.

You sigh softly, “Even if I agree to this… It could he really damaging for my career.”

“No one will find out.” His face was more serious now, and you could tell from the way he was looking at you that he meant it, “I’ll make sure of that.”

“But if if does-”

“It won’t.”

“But if it does, because there’s always a chance no matter what you think, then everyone will only think I got hired to tour manage because we’re ‘sleeping together.’” You say, using air quotes, just to further elaborate that this was all fake.

Harry had already got his grammy, he was at the peak of his career he’d be fine no matter what happened. But you were a female music producer in a male dominated industry, if people think you were only hired for this album because you’re fucking the singer- your career was over.

“If people find out I’ll kill you.”

“Does this mean you’re gonna agree?”

You nod, reluctantly.

“Thank you!” He jumps out of his chair, “I swear I’ll make it up to you, thank you so much.”

— — —

If you were in Harry’s position you’d be vigilant of everything, everyone, everywhere. You’d be paranoid of someone jumping through your bedroom window while you were asleep. But Harry was oddly calm. Maybe he was just like that. His lips were formed almost in a smile while he slept, and his eyes were moving under his eyelids- probably from a dream he was having. He wasn’t calm very often- recently he’d been very on edge and anxious about everything, it was nice to see him look so peaceful. You hoped for that sort of peace someday soon.

You had been in the studio going on six hours, and when he’d taken a break from recording so you could go over the tracks he’d managed to fall asleep in that short period of time.

You let him sleep while you packed up the equipment, putting things back into their assigned places, and didn’t bother waking him up until you were 100% ready to go.

“Harry,” You said softly, shaking his shoulder lightly, “Harry we gotta go.”

His eyes opened and he blinked a few times to adjust himself to the light.

“Huh?”

“We only had the studio booked until six, we gotta go.”

“Oh,” He sat up, stretching his arms and cracking his neck that had went into a cramp, “Sorry, don’t even remember falling asleep to be honest.”

“Don’t worry about it,” You shrug, “We got enough done today anyways. You deserve a rest.”

There were only three days left until the day Harry had said you were leaving for his parents place, and you had skipped over the subject every time he’d tried to bring it up. You didn’t really want to think about it because you were dreading it so badly.

“I’ll give you a ride home.” Harry said as you left the studio building.

“No, it’s alright.” You say, “I’ll just get an Uber.”

Harry glared at you, “Y/N, just get in the car.”

You glare back. But it had been a long day so getting a free lift wasn’t so bad.

“So.” He said, starting the car. “We gotta go over some things.”

“About the album?” You play dumb.

“… No.” He rolls his eyes, “Stop pretending you don’t know what I’m talking about.”

“I’m not pretending.”

“Love, you gotta tell me some stuff about you. My parents are gonna ask me shit and I don’t have a clue what to tell them.”

You groan. You should’ve stuck to your gut and got an Uber.

“Like what.”

He shrugs, “What’s your favourite colour?”

“Purple.” You reply.

“Mines is blue.”

“I know,” You reply.

“What’s your favourite song?” He asked.

You laughed to yourself a little.

“Jet black heart,” You grin, knowing you’d get some sort of reaction out of this answer, “By 5 Seconds of Summer.”

“5 Seconds of Summer?” Harry scoffs, “They’re punks!”

You roll their eyes, “They turned to pop music and half of them are married, they’re hardly punks.”

“You know one of them dated my sister, right?” Harry groaned.

“Yep,” You grin, “And wrote a banging tune about it as well.”

“Don’t remind me.” He muttered.

“Look, you asked me a question and I gave you an honest answer. You can’t complain.”

“I know, I know.” Harry said, “You got any exes?”

You raise your eyebrows, “What?”

“This is the kind of stuff I need to know! Like I dunno if I’m your first boyfriend and all that.”

“Harry… I’m 24 years old. You’re not my first boyfriend.”

You said it almost as if he was your boyfriend. It sent a chill down your spine. This was going to be a long few weeks.

“Good to know.” He said.

He dropped you off outside your apartment.

“I guess the next time I see you will be for when we’re leaving, yeah?”

You nod. There was no studio session booked until after his vacation to Cape Cod, where his families beach house was, so he was right. The next time you see him would be at the airport.

“Flights at seven.” He says.

“Got it.”

The next few weeks were going to be hell.

part two coming soon…

support me through ko-fi! (buy me a coffee!!)

[butterphii]

Just Us

Help Me (Part 1)

---------------------------------------------------

TW: Fake relationship, sexual tension, kissing, happiness, mostly fluff, secret crush

Note: First Jake series! Thank you @anyalikeslasagna for helping me so much through this part, it's gonna be a pretty mid length series, probably about 10 or less parts. Enjoy! ^^

-------------------Jake Peralta------------------

You were in your quiet and quaint apartment, soft music playing from your speaker as you cleaned and danced, a knock came rapping at your door.

You stopped the music with a call out, running to answer your door. As you opened the door, you saw Jake right outside with a tight, sparkly purple dress. "Hey, what's up? What's that for?" You asked, reaching for it before he pulled it away. "Let me in and I'll tell you," He said pushing you over and rummaging through your fridge. "You have nothing but junk in here!" He whined. "It's literally all the food groups, Jake. You just wouldn't know that because you only eat chips and drink only orange soda." You groaned. "True dat!" He chuckled to your reply. He sat on the couch, twiddling his fingers.

"Whats wrong?" You asked, handing him the bag of kettle cooked potato chips you had. "Well, you know how we're like besties and people usually think we're dating? Well I might..." He paused. "Have told the squad you were my girlfriend and that you'd come with me to the party with them tonight." He spoke quickly. You were quiet for a minute, trying to process the words that just came out of his mouth. "So I have to go to a party with your colleagues, whom of which I've NEVER MET, and pretend to DATE YOU?" You asked, angry he did that and never told you but happy you'd finally get to "date" Jake.

"Yeah..don't be mad, just come with me! It's gonna be ok! You're awesome, I'm totally awesome, and we'll be perfect together." He grinned. That was a sentence you've longed to hear.

"Fine. But, we need to discuss boundaries. I'm only going because I don't want you to embarrass yourself in front of your 'dad'." You were referring to the captain that Jake used to hate but now loves. "Alright! So's, what can I do an' what can't I do?" He asked, rubbing his sweaty palms on his knees.

"You can call me cute names, just nothing dumb, so like babe, baby, and dear is fine, no babydoll or baby girl." You exclaimed in disgust. "You can hold my hand, hip, and shoulder, no ass pokes. Kissing is good too, jus' no sexual jokes or anything, except your usual." The words slipped from your mouth easily. "I'm good with all of those. But, is holding you close to me ok? Like, pulling you by the waist, I guess." He asked, his cheeks a soft pink glow, his hand rubbing the back of his neck vigorously. You nodded to his question, handing him the TV remote. "Stay as long as you want, since we've gotta get into character." You told him, grabbing his hand and pulling him up off the couch.

"Ok, let me try this, just so you know, it's all fake," He smiled. "Don't take it like I'd really do this to you." A chuckle escaped his smile. You grinned at him, letting him do his thing.

He wrapped his arm around your waist, one hand resting on your lower back and the other on your upper, close to your neck. Your breath hitched, core aching. His hand moved its way to the back of your neck, pulling you close and your head up to reach his, and pressing a kiss to your lips.

His lips were soft. The kiss was softer. It was endearing. He had you pulled all the way up to his own body, a soft bulge growing under where your own pussy lay, crying for the feeling of it inside you.

He released your lips, looking into your eyes. His gorgeous brown eyes glimmering in the warm lighting of your apartment. "Was that good? Believable?" He asked, letting your body go. "Uh-Yeah. That's good." You smiled, the empty feeling filling your heart.

"Party's at 7, I'll pick you up. Wear this dress and uhh..black heels. I'll see you later, Princess." The last word was dragged out. You never said it was allowed, but you never said it wasn't. It made your heart flutter and your body warm. You grabbed the dress excitedly and skipped to your bedroom to pick out the rest of your outfit.

[geekgirles]

I love the myth about Hades and Persephone as much as the next girl, but am I the only one who would like for people to focus more on Dionysus and Ariadne? From a narrative and creative standpoint, I mean.

Despite my love for it, I'm no mythology expert, but you can't deny the appeal behind a story about a woman who was abandoned/forgotten by her first love, for whom she gave everything up, meeting and falling in love with a god who loved her genuinely, never mistreated her, and went as far as making her immortal so they could be together.

Can you imagine the potential this story has for modern retellings and tropes? Fake Relationship to Make Your Ex Jealous that Becomes Real, Ladykiller in Love, Cant' Act Perverted Towards a Love Interest, Single Woman Seeks Good Man...

Or for the sake of Pride Month, given Dionysus' love for crossdressing, the fact that Ariadne didn't seem to mind about most, if not any, of his affairs with others, and the undeniable fact that practically no one in Ancient Greece was straight, it also opens up the possibility of playing with queer characters and relationships beyond the nuclear family archetype. An actual modern retelling could even feature a transmac or nonbinary Dionysus in a committed yet open or even polyamourous relationship with Ariadne.

There's also what happens after they end up together, like exploring Ariadne's possible insecurities over being a mortal married to a god and the possible power imbalance. Or her getting used to Olympus or even struggling to move on from Theseus. Oh, and from Dionysus' side, the exploration of finally meeting someone who is immune to his godly charms and chooses to be by his side because she genuinely likes him!

You can't tell me this myth doesn't have the makings of a great source of content.

[thouarta]

i can’t stop listening to this song i need help…also writing a new fic with this song as the title instead of finishing my in progress fics i also need help for that. made this edit to quiet down my serennedy brain worms

song: every breath you take - the police

[it-happened-one-fic]

Reliable - Sebek

Author's Notes: This fic is for @rainbowcake1212 for my 300 Followers Event! I hope you enjoy your Hot Chocolate and Cheesecake fic!

Type: Gender-neutral reader/ fluff/ romantic/ Hot Chocolate and Cheesecake prompt

Word count: 2454

I stared, flabbergasted, at Sebek, who merely looked at me with that point-blank stare of his.

“So let me get this right…. You are getting harassed by overly pushy noble ladies seeking a…”

“A relationship.” He finished impatiently, scowling slightly before he continued, “I have rejected them countless times, but they still return. They no doubt wish to use me to get close to my Lord, but I will not allow it.”

A smug grin crossed his face as he finished, no doubt proud that he was protecting Malleus from a perceived threat. It was just sad that he didn’t realize he was perfectly worth being interested in all on his own without his connection to Malleus.

“And you want me to accompany you to this ball as your fake date?” I questioned him, hardly even able to believe that he had even brought this up.

And he simply nodded in confirmation, like there was nothing odd about it. 

I shook my head incredulously, “Wouldn’t it be better to find someone a little more… I don’t know, impressive, to scare off your suitors?”

His eyebrows rose in a surprisingly slow climb for someone quite as hot-blooded as Sebek, “No.” 

His hand twitched at his side, no doubt a sign of agitation at his having to request assistance from a human such as myself, “You will do perfectly well.”

I found myself shrugging, still not entirely certain about Sebek’s grand scheme but also willing to help. After all, it couldn’t be pleasant to be pursued by someone you’d already rejected.

 “Alright, I’ll do it. What do I need to know?” That ended up being the question I wished I’d never asked since that was the question that led to my copious and detailed instruction regarding the Valley of Thorns and its many, many customs.

But, come the day of the ball, I was certainly prepared. Especially since Mrs. Zigvolt herself had gotten me a suitably dressy outfit ready.

She’d been thrilled that Sebek had brought a friend home, and then even more delighted when she found I was going to be his partner for the evening. Even after I’d told her I was just his fake date, she remained delighted. Chuckling slightly to herself as she’d gotten my measurements, “Of course, dear. Of course.”

I’d frowned at her but kept my silence, not quite having the heart to tell her that Sebek was anything but interested in me. I was just handy for the current situation he was in. 

We were friends, but I doubted that line would ever be crossed since I was human and he’d made it painfully clear how he felt about humans in general. But, at the very least, pretending to be his date for the evening might be fun. Even if just a little.

And so I entered the palace on Sebek’s arm, doing my best to not be distracted by how good he looked in his clean-cut suit that made him look like a true knight even though he was still in training. 

If I hadn’t been able to see it before, I could certainly see why he had a great many suitors who were apparently hounding him.

The doors swung open as we arrived, carefully walking down the wide staircase into the ballroom filled with fae, who all turned to openly stare at us.

 Over at the raised dais, I could see Malleus, guarded by Lilia and Silver, alongside a seated woman whom I could assume was the queen.

The three of them seemed pleased to see me alongside Sebek, but I couldn’t say the same for everyone present.

There were several women, in particular, who seemed rather annoyed by my presence. Or perhaps it was more who I was with.

I leaned closer to Sebek, smiling relaxedly even as I whispered to him, “So what is it, exactly, that you’re wanting me to do?”

He glanced at me with one raised eyebrow, totally ruining the image of a happy couple by the lack of smile on his face, “You merely need to stay by my side.”

He spoke like that was obvious, and I sighed. Apparently, selling this relationship was going to be entirely up to me. 

And our first test came all too soon as a younger-looking noble came over, a smile on his face as he greeted Sebek, “Ah. It is good to see you again, Master Zigvolt. I am sure you are relieved to be home from school.” 

I watched awkwardly as the formalities were dispensed, feeling halfway like I was watching some sort of period film from a front row seat, until the man twisted to look at me, a charming smile on his face as he looked down at me, “And this is…?”

“Mine.” The response was blunt and immediate and had me looking up in utter shock at Sebek, who seemed perfectly relaxed. Like he hadn’t just spouted something utterly ridiculous, even if I was his fake date.

I smiled awkwardly as I looked back at the young man, who looked just as startled as I was, confirming that ‘mine’ was an odd way of introducing one’s partner even in the Valley of Thorns.

“Yes, I am Sebek’s partner,” I calmly let my hand continue to rest where it was, tucked through the crook of Sebek’s elbow, even as I squeezed his arm slightly in annoyed revenge. Earning myself an odd look from Sebek as I began cleaning up his mess.

“Please, call me Y/n,” The man nodded, smiling awkwardly as the two of us pretended that Sebek hadn’t just calmly asserted that I belonged to him. The man went on with what I assumed were more common pleasantries before at last bidding us adieu.

“It was a pleasure to have met you.” He bobbed his head awkwardly before quickly retreating as soon as he’d finished his piece. Leaving me to look up at Sebek in still frustrated shock.

“What was that?” I hissed at Sebek, earning myself an incredulous look from the young man, who apparently had seen nothing wrong with the introduction he’d given for me.

“I was letting him know that you were with me,” He was still utterly flummoxed, dragging a sigh out of me.

I’d known that Sebek was utterly hopeless, but this… I honestly hadn’t expected it to be quite this bad.

“Sebek, you can’t just introduce me as yours. No one does that. You need to just let people assume we’re together,” I quietly explained as we continued to meander through the room. Dodging various other guests who continued to watch the two of us with curious gazes.

“And why are people staring so much anyway? Is it that odd for you to come with someone?” Sebek was apparently more prepared for this line of conversation since he responded much more promptly and with less confusion as he shook his head.

“No. They are not used to humans. My father does not come to these… celebrations. The only human usually present is Silver, and he has already proved himself to be a competent knight. Other than that, it is only ever dignitaries.” I nodded as I mulled over his words, not entirely liking what they meant.

“So I’m the odd one here?” His nod confirmed my words, and I sighed, wondering for the thousandth time why he thought I would be a good choice for his fake date.

“Alright, what do we do next? Is there anyone you need to greet?” I looked up at him questioningly as he stopped us off to the side of the room. Glancing around as if to check that no one was too close to overhear us, even though people had been giving us wide-berth the entire time.

I suppose it was easier for them to observe from a distance.

“No, if anyone wishes to speak to me, they will come. At most, we’ll have to do one dance. For now, I’m going to get something to drink. Stay here,” So saying, he strode off. Straight-backed and proud as ever, even though it seemed like absolutely everyone was questioning his choice on his date. Including myself.

But that was the way Sebek often was. It was impossible to tell what was going to bother him and what wasn’t. While certain things being said about him would bother him endlessly, others wouldn’t. 

What surprised me was that the others whispering about the fact he’d come with a human didn’t bother him. It was true that his parents were a human and fae match, but I’d figured that such a thing would bother him.

I frowned, watching as one of the fae broke off from the crowd and approached me. It was a woman.

She was, just like the other fae, absolutely gorgeous. But, more importantly, she had me pointed and was obviously approaching to have a word with me. And if my reasons for being at this ball were anything to go by, it was going to have something to do with Sebek and what I was doing with him.

This was quite likely one of the suitors he’d wished to deter.

She smiled as she stopped in front of me, “You must be Sebek’s partner. I confess I wasn’t aware he had someone he was with until the two of you appeared. It is lovely to meet you.”

Her tone was sweet, and, to anyone watching, she would appear quite genuine. But there was something in the way she held herself, like a snake poised to strike at the very instant I gave her an opening, that spoke of anything but sweetness.

But this was something I’d already been prepared for. While Sebek hadn’t mentioned it, Lilia had.

The suitors Sebek so wished to deter weren’t likely to just accept that he’d found someone that he preferred over them. Much less if that person didn’t have a rank and wasn’t fae.

So I smiled back, preparing to play whatever game was being laid out in front of me, “Oh, we haven’t been together that long, and Sebek wanted to make sure I was ready to attend one of these balls before he brought me with him. He’s incredibly attentive, you see.”

Attentive indeed. I doubted I would ever forget the rigorous testing I’d gone through before he’d at last decided that I was ready for tonight.

“Indeed, he is quite a charming man. It’s good that he prepared you, though. It would be so unfortunate if something went wrong. After all, it wouldn’t just affect you, but him as well. Better to be safe than sorry, as they say.” 

She was an insincere one, that was certain. I could understand why Sebek wouldn’t like her, even as lovely as she was. 

And charming wasn’t the first word I would use to describe Sebek.

It was true that he had some endearing qualities and that he was quite attractive, but still… Charming didn’t quite encompass all of Sebek when one thought of exactly how loud and blunt he could be at times.

But I didn��t miss her oh-so-subtle threat about how if something were to occur, it would affect him. That was something I’d already realized and had been the only reason I’d accepted his lessons with little complaint.

“Well, yes, of course. I could never let something happen to harm him.” They weren’t untrue words. In fact, nothing I’d said was untrue. But, just from watching her, it didn’t look like I had to lie to upset her.

“My, you are a sweet one. I can understand why he likes you so well. However, I can’t help but wonder if you’ll be able to handle the pressure?”

I would have almost preferred if she’d thrown a drink in my face rather than attempting to slip through the cracks and hit me with attacks meant to weaken my resolve and cause uncertainty. But that was also her trouble. She wasn’t going to be able to sway me with such threats.

“Ah, well. I have faced certain pressures before, and I don’t want to disappoint Sebek….” I trailed off, watching as the man in question approached with a frown on his face.

“Y/n?” The woman turned to face him, her eyes wide at the tone he’d used. One that spoke of concern while simultaneously promising to handle the situation if I needed him to.

And that was one of the reasons this woman wouldn’t be able to sway me. Not only had she underestimated me, she’d underestimated exactly how much Sebek and I trusted one another.

I smiled at him, resting my hand on his arm, “Everything’s fine. I was just about to tell the lovely young woman that she needn’t worry about me. How could I ever crumble under any pressure and disappoint you when you are always so reliable?”

It was subtle, but I could see her fist clench behind her as she looked between me and Sebek. The picture of a supportive couple who wouldn’t crumble just because of a few spiteful words.

“I see.” He looked down at me for a brief moment, with a certain softness to his gaze before he looked her way. A proud smirk appeared on his face that had me bracing for the loudness that was coming.

“I THANK YOU FOR YOUR CONCERN FOR MY PARTNER, MISS RAFFLESIA. BUT AS YOU CAN SEE THERE IS NO NEED FOR SUCH WORRIES!” 

I barely managed to not cringe at his loudness but smiled nonetheless as he broadcasted the entire situation to everyone at the ball.

Whether calculated or not, he had certainly embarrassed ‘Miss Rafflesia,’ as evidenced by the way she retreated at impressive speeds.

“Was the yelling really necessary?” I looked up at him, still smiling at his customary volume, which had been oddly absent this evening.

He looked down at me, nodding firmly as he lowered his voice, no doubt because I’d mentioned his yelling, “Indeed. They all need to know that you have my utter trust. That way, they won’t bother trying to harass you when I am not near. It would take more than just a few words to break my trust in you, and I have faith that it is the same for you.”

My eyes widened at his words, ever blunt in his honesty, no matter the topic. I laughed slightly as I recovered from my surprise, earning myself a surprised look from my partner, which only amused me further.

But how could I help it when I’d long since realized that even though this was just a fake arrangement, I could have a far worse partner than someone quite as reliable as my very own knight.

*Rafflesia is a genus of parasitic flowering plants in the family Rafflesiaceae. 

[bookishwum]

Shepherd opened his mouth, but closed it again. Then he did something I’d never seen before. He smiled. Shepherd Calloway actually smiled.

— Faking Ms. Right, Claire Kingsley

[alea-says]

So, I've been thinking on the fake relationship trope - because it is one of my utter favourites. And trying to decide how I can put McDanno in such a situation - where it's not for a case.

So far I have:

sentinel and guide AU where the S&G Centre decide Steve's really gotta get a Guide. Now. Before he blows up all the islands. So Steve, of course, begs Danny (who is not a registered Guide, thank you very much) to stand in for him

End of s1 AU where Danny decides that, yes, he really does need all the access to Steve that marital status gives them and maybe fakes some legal documents so he can be there for Steve as much as possible (maybe Jerry appears earlier in this AU and helps with said documents, all while fully believing that McDanno were already 'married' they just hadn't wanted uncle Sam to know about it, so its not like hes really faking the documents so much as replacing ones that were always meant to be there)

Sentinel and Guide AU where, after losing their immunity and means at the end of s1, instead of getting it back with the new governor, Steve hatches a plot to keep 5-0 going. After all, everyone knows Sentinels and Guides get far more leeway in protecting the Tribe. All they have to do, Danny, is pretend to be an online pair. It'll be easy! (Only apparently going through a ritual bonding can actually turn latent, distant, whatever, sentinels and guides online and oh dear, now they're really stuck together)

The obligatory it's all for Grace one - somehow, in talking to Grace/her friends/teachers/etc, the social work/whoever assigned to assess her family situation in the latest custody go round 100% believes that Danny and Steve are an actual couple, but are lying to Grace about this fact. They'd like to suggest primary custody goes to Danny, but feel they can't do so while he's lying to his daughter. Does he really think it's a stable, healthy home life for Grace to be lied to about his obvious partner? It would be one thing if Danny was hiding Steve, but that's clearly not the case. Well, Danny will do anything for Grace, even make Steve agree to be his partner partner - at least until after the custody's settled.

Any other ideas?