#dan quotes

[natigail]

"I would like to say thank you to everybody for supporting the comeback of DanAndPhilGAMES. I was going through a beef (*brief) period unemployment because I stopped creating content on my own channel and people are always like: Dan, when are you going to upload again? You think that I- Phil had to drag me! He had to drag me back on the internet and sit me down to play The Sims. But on some level, I've been enjoying it. So you guys are reawakening me. You are de-conditioning me from the dystopia and I'm enjoying my time back. Everyone is just saying 'beef' in the chat. Yeah, cheers. We're going to be beefing. The comeback fixed our timeline. I mean, yeah, it kind of did. There's very few things in this world that gives us hope."

Dan Howell during a YouTube Live with Phil Lester on his 37th birthday (x)

I'm still a sucker for those soft-voiced honest moments that come from Dan when we least expect it. And this livestream was a great excuse to break out this old Dan quotes series of mine. (Also our dork didn't realise he said beef instead of brief <3)

Quotes from Dan (147/?)

[ginkgo-gremlin]

"some things are like cocomelon to me and some things are like crack/cocaine to me... but only because I have autism"

- me about making Majora's Mask out of paper maché

[autumnal-cadet-depravity]

By combining this with Dan’s comment about basement bongos from the drinking game video, we can only conclude that Dan and Phil go to gay clubs to find some third gay man to threesome with. But the threesome is two fucking and one playing bongos in the corner.

okay so the phouse has a sex dungeon

[amid-fandoms]

dan howell acting like he's experiencing brain damage at the thought of saying anything nice about phil when his dramatic ass tweeted this a month after meeting him cause he couldn't cope with not living in his bedside drawer 🙄

[seventh-district]

Making Incorrect H:SR Quotes Until I Run Out of (hopefully) Original Ideas - Pt. 2

[Pt. 1] [Pt. 3] [Pt. 4] [Pt. 5] [Pt. 6]

[enyasaints]

Just a Chill Guy in need of a wheelchair

I have raised $135 out of $2600 pretty cool. It would be even more chill to reach my goal. Honestly I’m just happy you’re reading this

I have Diabetic Neuropathy. My nerves are damaged and as a result I have been struggling to walk. It would be cool to get a motorized wheel chair on the lowest key.

Direct Aid:

V: Enyasaint

C: $Enyasaint

If y’all could vibe, donate and share it would be chill.

[satoshy12]

Happy Jazz = no Dan, Hurt Jazz = WE HAVE DAN!

Booster Gold". I command you to make Arkham safe! The future of creation depends on it!" Batman:" What?" Booster Gold:" Do you know the horror I and other time travellers experienced just a few days ago, for the key to the beginning of the end of all things is in Arkham?" Flash:" Stop, stop, what are you talking about?" Booster Gold: "I saw Dan! His sister is an intern at Arkham, what do you think will happen if she gets hurt or worse, killed by them?" The other time travellers all stop and look at Booster Gold: "If this is some more of you crying wolf to scare us!" Booster Gold:" NO! I LEARNED MY LESSON AFTER 2 TIMES! I CAN EVEN PROVE IT, LOOK!!" Shows them a picture on his phone that he took of Dan. Ted: "He's telling the truth about Dan for once… Wait! YOU SAID ARKHAM! BATMAN!!"

Batman pulls out phone:" On it….. Done. She will now be interning at Wayne Child Psychiatry."

Time traveller:" Good!" League:" So, you will now Tell us about that. Dan Person?"

Extra.

A few weeks later

Booster Gold:" Even worse problems! She turns out to be dating Red Hood!" Time Traveller:" Can't she just stay safe!"

[incorrecthsrchats]

Flutter Flutter hoe

[reunitedinterlude]

phil: whenever i see an ambulance, i like to think there is a baby being born, rather than a death (1, 2, 3)

[incorrectstarrailquotes]

Black Swan: My girl can wear whatever she wants because I am scared of her.

Stelle: My girl can wear whatever she wants because I can fight.

Himeko: My girl can wear whatever she wants because she a hoe and I knew that before we got married.

-

Sampo: My man can wear whatever he wants because I am scared of his sister.

Caelus: My man can wear whatever he wants because I can fight.

Dr. Ratio: My man can wear whatever he wants because he's a hoe and I knew that before we got married.

[ultrakillblast]

THE RETURN OF THE LIVING DEAD (1985)

[natigail]

“I do want to have a sincere moment to say thank you to everybody for fucking leaving the house and being here tonight. Just to see me. Jesus. This was the 76th time that I did this show. It’s been obviously, like, a huge part of my life for the last two years and as you know - ‘cause I’ve been waffling about it - there was a fucking pandemic, we went through some shit, yeah? It did a number on all of us. And doing this was something every single day I came out and did it, I was like: I can just fucking keep going, as long as I keep saying this shit until I actually believe it. I fought so fucking hard and all of you were so awesome. Even when I’m trying to be real as fuck and you scream: eating ass. For everyone who left the house, and watching online, I really appreciate all of your support and you are the only reason why I continue to make myself look like a fucking ass on the internet.”

- Dan Howell coming back onto stage after finishing the last We’re All Doomed show in London, 11th of February 2024

Quotes from Dan (148/?)

[stickball-jos10]

[At a zoo]

Neil: What are they in for?

Matt: This isn’t jail

Neil: So, they can leave?

Dan: Well, no-

Andrew, pointing to a flamingo: I bet that one killed somebody

[danhoneyyysblog]

Stelle: That shirt looks great, (Y/N).


(Y/N): Thanks.


Stelle: But I bet it would look even better on Dan Heng’s floor.


Dan Heng: Are you hitting on (Y/N)... for me?

[sh1-n0bu]

incorrect hsr quotes #2

[name], visibly exhausted, downing more shots than usual: so eventually, i’m like, being nice doesn’t work. being nice gets me stalkers

dan heng, sitting in the nearest table, watching [name]: i kinda feel called out

[name], continuing on: being mean gets me crazy men who are attracted to crazy person

blade, sitting in the same table as dan heng, nodding proudly: yep. i asked them to crush my skull in the other day

[name]: and so, i’m just gonna ignore y’all now

dan heng and blade: sulks after hearing that

jing yuan, who’s been at the same table as dan heng and blade, with a smug grin: aww but pookie🥺

[name], done with their shit: and they liKE THAT TOO! LEAVE ME ALONE❗️❗️

kafka, [name]’s gossip bestie: aww but pookie, you’re living the life

[h4unted-d4rling]

What seat are you taking?

I’m picking three. I need to shoot my shot with that damn triangle