#couples therapy for example

[mishy-mashy]

Guys. Idea.

Imagine: the absolute crapshow that comes with being the sole therapist of Lugnica's knights.

We've got Reinhard with mommy and daddy issues, Julius with mommy and daddy issues, Ferris with mommy and daddy issues, (if only) Subaru's EVERYTHING issues—

Marcos only hired because he thought it necessary, and thought only one was all he needed, but he really underestimated the issues his knights have

Then again, mental health probably isn't well-known, to the point that even the therapist can't get their own therapist

"Holy shit, I need a drink," you sighed, rubbing your temples.

Julius, without hesitating from his red, plush chair, procured out a nice, expensive-looking bottle of bourbon.

"... That'll do."

Got a problem? Head to Lugnica's single, extremely over-worked therapist

Even Heinkel shows up and it's just- what the heck. He's carting in a sleeping, golden-haired woman on a wheelchair, wearing a sullen face

"This is my wife, Louanna."

... What the hell were you supposed to do with this information? Therapy no jutsu her awake? You heard enough from Reinhard, and by the Great Waterfall, did you need Julius's alcohol cabinet to even think of tackling the Astrea family's problems.

Then again, you did make sure Julius discarded it... damn.

"I heard you give relationship advice."

Your brain stuttered. Then you decided that, as soon as this was over, you were dragging down Reinhard for an emergency session, missions be damned.

To make things worse, a Divine Protection that cancels others' Divine Protections. Reinhard is a mere pebble before you. Unless he gets a Divine Protection to nullify yours, but the world sees it to his benefit to not. So he don't get it.

Julius is visibly confused, watching a sobbing Reinhard get escorted out of the room by you. Also worried for himself, knowing he's next.

Rinse, repeat, Ferris is visibly confused, watching a sobbing Julius get escorted out of the room by you.

Reinhard just has a sympathetic face to Julius. Meanwhile, you realize your work is cut out for you.

[fingertipsmp3]

I feel like I’ve lived through at least a month just in the past 3 days. I checked the date just now and damn near had an out of body experience when I realised Monday was only two days ago

[fieldmoths]

i wish i could concisely explain my sims world but i’ve been fleshing the same one out for almost 2 years. where do i even begin

[kc-rising]

I Need Help

Hey folks, serious post. I've mentioned what's going on with me a couple times but never really went into much detail; I've been having severe pain in my left side for over 3 months now. Doctors can't figure out what's causing it, no X-rays, CT scans, ultrasounds, or blood work show anything. I've seen multiple specialists and gotten no answers. I finally got one of them to send me to physical therapy which I started last week.

My co-pay for specialists is very high and my physical therapy counts as specialist visits according to my shit insurance.

I'm going to be out $600 in the next few weeks because of this. I'm already out more than $500 because of the previous doctor visits and imaging done. So that's over $1100. And this is assuming the PT fixes me. I hope it does, I'm so tired of dealing with this. More bills are still coming in as well so who knows how much I actually owe...

I really hate asking for real life money, especially right now with all the Palestinian gfms going around, but I'm struggling, my job pays like shit (in the US? shocking I know /s) and I haven't been able to work a full shift for the 3 months this has been going on. All of this is excluding my normal medical costs for unrelated issues, which are expensive enough as it is.

I'm going to drop some links here.

Help Me Pay My Medical Bills

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These obviously aren't doodles but they're the most recent pieces I've made and are most accurate to my current style. The more you donate the more time I will spend on your request.

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[imunbreakabledude]

this keeps coming back to me, i am actually so obsessed with the idea of elena smugly dragging maeve into therapy after years and years; finally getting a long-sought-after piece of vindication in her "i can fix her" quest, only for connie, elena's heroic therapist who helped her navigate the emotional highs and lows of maeve's drama over the years, to suddenly become rapt hearing about all of maeve's insane fucked up life ... connie's like "oh i get it now, I can fix her." while elena is shocked and betrayed, suffering the consequences of her own actions (no one else gets to fix Maeve but her!)

basically:

all i can think about lately is maeve and elena in couples therapy. ... maeve has to be dragged all but kicking and screaming (but she'll do it for elena. obviously) and is very reticent while elena's all like "let me teach you how therapy works..." but then the therapist takes an Interest in Maeve and gets her to start talking and Maeve loves it and also loves how much it pisses Elena off to not be the Teacher's Pet in couples therapy

or they go in for a session with Elena's longtime therapist and get to talking and Maeve starts explaining something from the past and Elena is like "yeah yeah yeah she knows I've told her about that" and Maeve's like "well not MY VERSION" and Elena looks over @ connie like, 'get a load of this' but then realizes connie is RAPT ready to take notes from Maeve's account and then elena's like BYE NO MORE THERAPY YOU CAN'T HAVE MY THERAPIST

[moonastro]

Juno persona chart

saturn in the houses

what is a juno persona chart? looking into juno persona chart gives more detailed insight of how the relationship and marriage overall of you and your spouse will be like. it also describes them in a sense as well. The Greek Goddess Juno is described to rule over love and marriage and hence why the asteroid is looked into for that theme.

saturn embodies restriction, teaches hard lessons and rules time. in the juno persona chart, saturn can tell us what lessons can be learned within the marriage, how a couple thrives within time in the marriage and the possible restrictions withing the bond.

reminder: this is my interpretation from observations and first hand experiences, so don't take this to heart.

saturn in 1st house: saturn here gives lessons to the couple in the marriage about self worth and ego matters. this placement may need to undergo some lessons related with how they view themselves perhaps taking up some time to take care of themselves and build a good routine for their skincare, perhaps taking therapy and so forth. this placement tends to bring their insecurities onto their spouse so they may need to work on that in order to build their marriage into a prosperous one. as time goes on the couple may be Intune with each others ego and may be at a point where they express their anger in a healthy matter.

spouse may have natal saturn in aries, 1st house, fire sign or fire house.

saturn in 2nd house: this placement experiences lessons related to greed and possessions. saturn may possess a lesson for this placement to regulate and test their greed towards money and other luxurious possessions that they might own. not giving into the mindset of having it all and being non selfish towards each other. loyalty is also a big part of saturns lesson for this placement, saturn may test this placement loyalty towards their spouse withing the marriage in order to strengthen it. saturn may also wants the individual to be patient within the marriage and not rush things in order to get things instantly. when this placement tries to skip steps to get to their goal saturn will delay their results even longer as it is the planet of delays itself. over time, the marriage may find strength in appreciating the smaller things in life whether it is their hobbies, their pet, their little keyring that they bought or a plant that has been growing in their garden whatever it is this placement will have much appreciation for the life that they have with heir spouse.

spouse may have natal saturn in taurus, 2nd house, earth sign or earth house.

saturn in 3rd house: this placement may experience lessons related to talking and expressing themselves. this placement may need to work on the way they communicate with their spouse. after marriage work may be needed in order to improve situation ships with siblings, something to do with this placements siblings or spouses sibling. there may be some delay in how effective the couple expresses themselves truly to their spouse. saturn here may bring lessons to the couples ability to understand each others mannerisms which may bring some arguments and unnecessary arguments, however, as time goes by saturn does perfect how the couple talk to each other and how they understand one another, this is the type of placement that over time will automatically know what their spouse means without them needing to even say a word, so they may master observing each others facial expression, body movements and body language.

spouse may have natal saturn in gemini, 3rd house, air sign or air house.

saturn in 4th house: for this placement saturn may impose a lesson related to their home life. this may exceed in ways related to living situations inside the home and to make sure they are compatible to have shares of the same home. an example can be one not being tidy and the other being very tidy, one may prefer neutral colour for home décor and the other likes bright, that sort of things. there may be some lessons that need to be learned with family members, outside home family members. like there may be some setbacks to do with this placements parents, siblings, spouses family also. with this placement, they tend to get married in spite of leaving their household so they can leave their living conditions whether it is negative or positive. overtime the couple may get the gift of creating a home that is up to their standards, so may even own property, may own land, may get inheritance from family and may have children that complete the family.

spouse may haven natal saturn in cancer, 4th house, water sign or water house.

saturn in 5th house: saturn may bring lessons when it comes to children, this placement may have kids and those kids are here to teach the couple within the marriage some sort of lesson. saturn may also give this marriage lessons to do with something with the eye of the public. this placement may need to be careful with how they act with their spouse around people to be careful of getting into some sort of twist. for example lots of people may assume stuff about his marriage so they like to create drama about this placements marriage. this placement need to be careful to not mess around when around other people with spouse, people may pin point the most silliest of reasons to create rumours and that may affect opportunities. over time saturn tends to give this placement the ability to value their happiness and tends to give the couple extreme blessings in being happy and prosperous.

spouse may have natal saturn in leo, 5th house, fire sign or fire house.

saturn in 6th house: this placement may experience lessons to do with how they give out to others. this placement may have to do lots of acts of service in the marriage. saturn in this placement may act a bit harsher since this house is seen as an illness house so saturn may actually need this placement to learn how to take care of themselves and other people. sickness may occur within the marriage, lots of illnesses may occur especially for the other individual int he marriage since saturn want this placement to take care of someone. over time, marriage may find mastery with not judging each other and one another, accepting life as it is and learning to respect ones boundaries in the marriage.

spouse may have natal saturn in virgo, 6th house, earth sign or earth house.

saturn in 7th house: saturn may give lessons related to equality and learning to treat one another fairly. saturn here may require to revolutionise the ability for this placement to treat their partner fairly and quite frankly learning how to get rid of the mentality others may have implanted into this placements head when it comes to marriage. this placements may need to learn how they treat other people while being married meaning that they should learn how to be loyal to their spouse meaning that treating other people as a partnership and not a relationship, basically not cheat. overtime saturn gives this placements marriage a very harmonious marriage, very abundant and luxurious, there may be lots of government doing that improves financial situations and therefore increases the relationship with spouse.

spouse may have natal saturn in libra, 7th house, air sign or air house.

saturn in 8th house: for this placement saturn may give lessons related to trust. the couple within the marriage should learn how to fully trust each other and not accuse each other of false accusations. also learn to not use vulgar language towards each other and learn to come up with ways to cope with their emotions. there may be restrictions to intimacy meaning that there may be a drawback that prevents the couple of getting intimate, it may be a s simple as incompatibility with schedule and feeling too tired. may also experience lots of transformation periods where it feels like chapters in your life are going by too fast that you may not keep up with the energy. overtime, saturn gives reward to the marriage in terms of dealing with other peoples money so tax, dept, insurance all that jazz. all depts may be paid from perhaps the help of other people money such as inheritance, winning lottery, from selling something and so on. the couple may be tax free over time and may enjoy the rest of their time spending money on the things that they wanted to get but couldn't.

spouse may have natal saturn in scorpio, 8th house, water sign or water house.

saturn in 9th house: saturn here gives lessons of learning to be apart from each other and not sticking by each others back side all the time. this placement tends to teach the couple within the marriage how to live, thrive and survive without each other also. so saturn may take one party and give them lots of travelling opportunities in order for that lesson to be taught. saturn here may also give some lessons related to cultures, something to do with religion and spirituality also. this placement perhaps has different culture background to their spouse so it may bring some sort of lesson for them in terms of that difference. overtime the couple may become very spiritually aligned and may have mastered their spiritual sides of one another.

spouse may have natal saturn in sagittarius, 9th house, fire sign or fire house.

saturn in 10th house: this placement may find themselves in situations where they receive lessons with their maturity in the marriage. this placement may attract people who judge them based on what they did ages ago, their reputation may have some sort of downfall or may need time for people to actually see you for who you are and not who you where years and years ago in the marriage. this may occur from this placements spouses side of the family also. overtime, saturn gives rewards in this placement career and status regarding from their hard work. marriage may benefit from that as it may increase public appreciation and may give the couple the long awaited reward that can be seen by other people also.

spouse may have natal saturn in capricorn, 10th house, earth sign or earth house.

saturn in 11th house: saturn may impose lessons related to their values. this placement may need to work on how they approach their views and values within the marriage as it may not be compatible in the marriage. saturn may give lessons that require the individual to question their self-worth and what this placement may believe in, with that if the individual still holds onto their values after time, saturn sees the effort and determination that it took so saturn gives luck to the individual that has to do to what their value is, this benefits the marriage. saturn also gives the experience to learn how their social group benefits them, if they don't saturn will show the individual that through the lessons. overtime, the couple may find growth in how they appear to a big group of people and crowds in general. saturn may also give stability in how they network and how they treat their community as it may benefit the couple in the marriage.

spouse may have natal saturn in aquarius, 11th house, air sign or air house.

saturn in 12th house: this placement may face lessons related to addictions. the couple within the marriage should have healthy coping strategies for their every day life such as routine, love towards each other and jealousy. saturn gives lessons within the marriage to do with spirituality and secrecy. this placement may need to work to not keep secrets with one another and need to have healthy ways of coping with hardships, one of ways that this can be worked on is by spiritually working with one another, meditating, shadow work, reiki, sound healing and doing chakra alignments. (any other sort of mindfulness can be used also these are just examples as each placement is unique to each individual). overtime, saturn gives growth in the themes of travel, emotional support, dreams coming true after hard work and marriage becoming very romantic and therefore feelings towards one another may be very sensual and magical.

spouse may have natal saturn in pisces, 12th house, water sign or water house.

thank youu for reading🌟🌼have a blessed day

[regainingparadise]

Relistening to TMA Season 5, I am again struck by how goddam badly Martin and Jon need couples counseling.

I love them both. I ship them very much. But oh lord they have issues

Like, these are two individuals who, under the very best of circumstances, would really need therapy both individually and together. They are both people with plentiful quantities of relational trauma from childhood that neither of them have worked through even the slightest bit.

And then you throw them into the apocalypse. And you add a metric fuck ton of guilt, helplessness, and the dynamics of being "The Antichrist and +1"?

On a surface level--Jon is in a perpetual state of information overload. Martin is in a perpetual state of "can you please just explain the basics of what's' going on in a given situation and not just say "it's complicated" or launch into a gruesome monologue"

But on a deeper level, their childhood relational traumas have left them each with opposing avoidant tendencies: Jon is unwilling to broach a difficult conversation, which leads him to hide information until he's confronted. Martin, on the other hand, has a finely honed ability to ignore information that he doesn't like until he no longer can hide from it.

Biggest example of their avoidance tendencies: Martin's Domain

Way early on, when we barely understand any of how the hellscape works, Jon mentions it, Martin shuts it down hard and deflects quickly with a bid for affection from Jon

Martin is in deliberate denial, but Jon admittedly wasn't particularly clear to start with.

"We all have a domain."

Jon means it, presumably, as "Me, You, and other 'Avatars.'" Jon is used to being grouped with those empowered by the Entities. Martin isn't. (see also: MAG185: Martin" Is that how these creatures see us now? As one of them?") But that's not what Jon says. And this is MAG167--they've only been through four domains, at least that we've seen. Jon is speaking from a place of knowledge, and assuming his listener has that same knowledge.

And when this issue comes up much later in MAG183, Martin has spent 17 episodes ignoring or forgetting that he has a domain, not letting that information in so that he has never processed it. (See also: Mag170: "Sometimes I wonder if I forget things on purpose. Easier not to think about them, I guess. Easier to just let them… slip away. They can’t hurt you if you don’t think about them.").

Martin confronts Jon on his avoidance (because while Martin may be good at ignoring things he doesn't like, he's far better at bringing up challenging topics), Jon is able to manage some A+ communication on his feelings and the genuine challenging of figuring out how to share upsetting information when he has All The Information, Martin accepts that. I just desperately want a therapist to be there and make them continue this conversation and practice ongoing good communication skills!

Though they resolve this, even though Jon has an explanation that makes sense...he was really leaving this conversation to the last minute. Would he have "[brought] it up at the crossroads" as he claims to Helen? Or would he have avoided it entirely, as she accuses, or waited till they were at the threshold, as he does with The Desolation and the Hunt, leaving Martin to confront terrifying situations without forewarning or planning or explanation.

Again, Jon kind of tried to bring up some of the potential issues with Basira and Daisy before entering the Hunt domain, but kept it Vague and Ominous ("Things aren't...good"). Martin took that vagueness as an opening to avoid engaging with potential bad news. The teensiest bit of therapy for either of them about their communication issues could have let Jon add "I know you're exited but FYI here are some specifics that you should know" and/or Martin go "I'm excited to see them but given that nothing is good right now, can you be more specific?"

Instead, Jon approaches difficult conversations by being Vague and Ominous, Martin gets snarky or passive-aggressive at the vagueness, upset or aggressively avoidant at the Ominousness, Jon closes back up like a turtle into his shell, and the conversation only comes back up when the situation has drastically escalated, leaving them both more upset.

Jon wants Martin to trust him, because explaining what he knows implicitly is an ordeal for him, and because his upbringing by his grandmother has suggested that communicating is generally unwanted and burdensome (See: MAG081 A Guest for Mr. Spider).

Martin wants to know what is going on, because he's in an awful hellscape of shifting rules about what can and cannot hurt them, completely dependent on a brand-new romantic partner for his survival and purpose, and also because his upbringing and coping mechanisms as a caretaker rely on him knowing enough to help, and his time as an archival assistant has given him some not-inconsiderable trauma about being left in the dark (See: MAG118 The Masquerade) (There's also another post in my head about how MAG118 primed Martin for both the Lonely and his development as a more confrontational character in S5)

All that to say.

Martin needs therapy to deal with the way he chooses not to absorb information he doesn't like. Jon needs therapy to understand that sometimes it's ok to bring up important topics even if the other person will be upset. They both need therapy to cope with all the guilt and helplessness around the apocalypse so they stop taking it out on each other. They need therapy together to learn how to work through their conflicting coping mechanisms.

[orphiclovers]

Here's a headcanon/theory: Kim Dokja has been to therapy pre-scenarios.

There's a couple of reasons I think this. First, it's likely that as an underage witness of a murder he was assigned a child psychologist, at least for the duration of the case and court proceedings. And after he was adopted by his relatives, I think they would definitely recommend to take him to psychological counseling for the severe trauma he suffered at such a young age.

And they probably did. No matter how neglectful they might have turned out as Kim Dokja got older, they had accepted him and this would have been common sense, recommended to them by the court, and would reflect badly on them if they didn't follow through.

Second, he must have seen a psychiatrist after his suicide attempt as a teenager. Also an extreme scenario where there would be pressure on his relatives to do something about his mental health.

And thirdly, just the way he acts? Whenever he's in a stressful situation, his most common reaction is 'take deep breaths and staying calm'. He does this CONSTANTLY. Here's just some examples.

This FEELS like 'I've been to therapy and they taught me to do breathing exercises there'. His singular ability to stay calm during all kinds of stressful scenarios is one of the big reasons kimcom relies on him so much. And even when that fails and he has a flashback, when the Fourth Wall stabilizes him, the first thing he does is control his breathing again.

[moriitis]

What if...

Toby lived a normal life? HEADCANONS.

For starters, he'd still suffer with Tourette's and CIPA. I'd like to think Schizophrenia is still there too, but he's on meds for that now.

His sisters survives the car accident, taking a couple of years to recover properly.

His dad goes to prison for abuse and neglect, therefor not being part of Toby or Lyra's life. Toby absolutely goes no contact with him, even going as far as wanting a restraining order against him. Lyra is still torn on it, however Toby always tries to get her to do the same just for her safety.

His mom loses custody of them and Toby ends up in a foster home as his mom is deemed mentally unfit to look after him.

However, she works on herself and her trauma and attends therapy.

His foster parents also pay for his own therapy sessions to help cope with the abuse.

When he turns sixteen, he's allowed to see his mom on the weekends.

He also gets a job!

Only in fast-food, like Mcdonalds or Wendys or something.

He saves up to buy himself a crappy car and gets his licence.

Always makes time to see Lyra at her own apartment.

When he turns eighteen and leaves foster care, he gets his own apartment.

Turns his focus to music, probably a guitarist or drummer.

Always attends concerts.

He'd avoid alcohol but would smoke weed probably every couple days.

Would generally just be a pretty nice guy, more open and accepting.

Super kind too, just because he knows what its like to go through some shit.

Would be a midwest emo guy FOR SURE.

He'd always be up to drop you off if you needed a ride.

Would 100% be the guy who waits for you to get inside before he drives off

REALLY funny too

For example working with him would be like the best

He'd be annoying though but that's the way he flirts

Like throwing lettuce at you or putting ice down your shirt

Would be a really soft guy though

[religion-is-a-mental-illness]

By: Jesse Singal

Published: Jun 27, 2024

In April Hilary Cass, a British paediatrician, published her review of gender-identity services for children and young people, commissioned by NHS England. It cast doubt on the evidence base for youth gender medicine. This prompted the World Professional Association for Transgender Health (WPATH), the leading professional organisation for the doctors and practitioners who provide services to trans people, to release a blistering rejoinder. WPATH said that its own guidelines were sturdier, in part because they were “based on far more systematic reviews”.

Systematic reviews should evaluate the evidence for a given medical question in a careful, rigorous manner. Such efforts are particularly important at the moment, given the feverish state of the American debate on youth gender medicine, which is soon to culminate in a Supreme Court case challenging a ban in Tennessee. The case turns, in part, on questions of evidence and expert authority.

Court documents recently released as part of the discovery process in a case involving youth gender medicine in Alabama reveal that WPATH's claim was built on shaky foundations. The documents show that the organisation’s leaders interfered with the production of systematic reviews that it had commissioned from the Johns Hopkins University Evidence-Based Practice Centre (EPC) in 2018.

From early on in the contract negotiations, WPATH expressed a desire to control the results of the Hopkins team’s work. In December 2017, for example, Donna Kelly, an executive director at PATH, told Karen Robinson, the EPC's director, that the WPATH board felt the EPC researchers “cannot publish their findings independently”. A couple of weeks later, Ms Kelly emphasised that, “the [WPATH] board wants it to be clear that the data cannot be used without WPATH approval”.

Ms Robinson saw this as an attempt to exert undue influence over what was supposed to be an independent process. John Ioannidis of Stanford University, who co-authored guidelines for systematic reviews, says that if sponsors interfere or are allowed to veto results, this can lead to either biased summaries or suppression of unfavourable evidence. Ms Robinson sought to avoid such an outcome. “In general, my understanding is that the university will not sign off on a contract that allows a sponsor to stop an academic publication,” she wrote to Ms Kelly.

Months later, with the issue still apparently unresolved, Ms Robinson adopted a sterner tone. She noted in an email in March 2018 that, “Hopkins as an academic institution, and I as a faculty member therein, will not sign something that limits academic freedom in this manner,” nor “language that goes against current standards in systematic reviews and in guideline development”.

Not to reason XY

Eventually WPATH relented, and in May 2018 Ms Robinson signed a contract granting WPATH power to review and offer feedback on her team’s work, but not to meddle in any substantive way. After WPATH leaders saw two manuscripts submitted for review in July 2020, however, the parties’ disagreements flared up again. In August the WPATH executive committee wrote to Ms Robinson that WPATH had “many concerns” about these papers, and that it was implementing a new policy in which WPATH would have authority to influence the EPC team’s output—including the power to nip papers in the bud on the basis of their conclusions.

Ms Robinson protested that the new policy did not reflect the contract she had signed and violated basic principles of unfettered scientific inquiry she had emphasised repeatedly in her dealings with WPATH. The Hopkins team published only one paper after WPATH implemented its new policy: a 2021 meta-analysis on the effects of hormone therapy on transgender people. Among the recently released court documents is a WPATH checklist confirming that an individual from WPATH was involved “in the design, drafting of the article and final approval of [that] article”. (The article itself explicitly claims the opposite.) Now, more than six years after signing the agreement, the EPC team does not appear to have published anything else, despite having provided WPATH with the material for six systematic reviews, according to the documents.

No one at WPATH or Johns Hopkins has responded to multiple inquiries, so there are still gaps in this timeline. But an email in October 2020 from WPATH figures, including its incoming president at the time, Walter Bouman, to the working group on guidelines, made clear what sort of science WPATH did (and did not) want published. Research must be “thoroughly scrutinised and reviewed to ensure that publication does not negatively affect the provision of transgender health care in the broadest sense,” it stated. Mr Bouman and one other coauthor of that email have been named to a World Health Organisation advisory board tasked with developing best practices for transgender medicine.

Another document recently unsealed shows that Rachel Levine, a transwoman who is assistant secretary for health, succeeded in pressing WPATH to remove minimum ages for the treatment of children from its 2022 standards of care. Dr Levine’s office has not commented. Questions remain unanswered, but none of this helps WPATH’s claim to be an organisation that bases its recommendations on science. 

[ Via: https://archive.today/wJCI7 ]

--

==

So, there are 6 completed reviews sitting somewhere, that WPATH knows shows undesirable (to them) results. And they know it. And despite - or perhaps, because of - that, they wrote the insane SOC8 anyway. And then, at the behest of Rachel Levine, went back and took out the age limits, making it even more insane.

This isn't how science works, it's how a cult works.

When John Templeton Foundation commissioned a study on the efficacy of intercessory prayer, a study which unsurprisingly found that it's completely ineffective, it was forced to publish the negative results.

So, even the religious are more ethical than gender ideologues when it comes to science. This is outright scientific corruption.

[copperbadge]

how did u psych urself up to go to therapy? my executive function has been awol for like 2 years and it's gotten to the point where it's wrecking my ability to do anything. i'm scared to waste a bunch of time and money going and getting told i'm just lazy or that the problem is just me

Happy to talk about that! But this is really two issues, so I gotta do a fly-by real first on "scared of getting told I'm just lazy". :D

It sounds to me like you're aware intellectually that laziness isn't the issue. You know this is an executive function issue and not a personal flaw, but I definitely get that it's hard to internalize that. So I'm going to drop links here to some discussion of "laziness":

How do you know you're not just lazy? (ask sent to me -- it's long, but you can skim for the laziness bits if you want.)

Lack of motivation means you are avoiding pain (second ask in response to the first)

Laziness Does Not Exist by Devon Price

These are essentially my proofs when I want to remind you that laziness is a label that stigmatizes an innate behavior -- inability to act is real, laziness is not. If a therapist tells you that you are lazy, and ESPECIALLY that you are the problem, you should fire that therapist. Don't even stay the rest of the session if you don't want to, just say "I see we are not compatible," and bounce. I don't think the odds are high that you'll encounter that, but on the off-chance that you do, that's a bright neon sign that they're a bad therapist.

In fact I would open with that pitch: "I'm struggling with executive function and the self-perception that I'm really just lazy. I need help with the actual executive function issues but also with how I view myself because of them." The therapist's response will tell you a lot about whether they'd be a good fit.

So with that out of the way...

I eased myself into therapy with the speed of a small child entering an extremely cold lake. It helped a lot that all of my therapy has been virtual via Zoom, so a lot of stuff that would have been a barrier, like going to the physical appointments, discomfort in a strange space, etc. were swept away.

I didn't even want to see a psychiatrist for my Adderall prescription, but I knew I needed help and medication seemed to be my best option, so with the assurances of several people that it wasn't therapy so much as mental health maintenance, I saw a psychiatrist. And he was lovely! (I just met with him yesterday to go over my next few months of scrip.) For a while that was all I did: talked every month to a kind person who asked specific and measurable questions about my mental health -- mood, sleep patterns, ability to work, hobbies -- without getting especially personal. I thought, okay, I can handle this, I can probably handle more, so I asked him for a recommendation for a therapist.

He looked at the network of independent practitioners he belonged to (Clarity Clinic Chicago, if you want an example of a good network) and found me a couple of options. I got extremely lucky to find someone I felt was appropriate for me right out of the gate, though some of that was also knowing what criteria I had: I wanted someone who explicitly stated they specialized in adult ADHD and disability, and who seemed like they were interested in addressing a whole person and not a single issue. When we met she seemed nice, wasn't pushy or judgey, was familiar with spoon theory and disability activism because she also has ADHD, and didn't blink (or ask overly invasive questions) when I said I was very uneasy about therapy because of past experience. She was comfortable with the ambiguity I brought -- I basically said "Look, I think this is something I need but I'm not entirely sure what my goals are yet, it's just I only recently found out I have ADHD and I am rethinking a lot of stuff," and she was like fine, let's rethink it together.

It still took me a long time to start talking about anything meaningful, but she handled the non-meaningful stuff as if it was serious and important, which helped. Admittedly I have really good insurance so I pay $20 a session for therapy, which also helps; it's pretty negligible in terms of health costs for me. I can afford to dawdle.

So, all that said...my path may not be an option for you, but I think it indicates the kinds of options you have. You don't have to jump into serious and heavily emotional processing first thing if you don't want to. You can shop around for therapists and you can drop any bad ones you encounter speedily, or if you find one you immediately like you can still spend time getting comfortable before dropping into the heavier stuff.

I would suggest that if you have a prescribing psych or doctor for any kind of mental health meds, ask them if they have a recommendation. If you don't have that, ask around people you know or believe have access to therapy and see what they think. If those aren't available to you or you're uncomfortable with that, I'd do a search for licensed therapist and your health insurance, or see if your workplace has an employee assistance program that can recommend you someone.

Good luck! I hope you get what you need. Lord knows I've been there.

[novlr]

how to write a character dealing with addiction (like drugs, cigarettes etc..)

Writing a character with an addiction is to write about someone who is controlled by that substance. They are chasing that first experience of euphoria, pain relief, excess energy, or relaxation. They are avoiding the emotional and physical crashes of withdrawal. Their behavior to outsiders often appears erratic and illogical. It is a powerful motivator for a character and can drive a plot, be an obstacle, and/or an antagonist. 

How does addiction work?

Addictive substances typically mimic naturally occurring chemicals in the body. They amplify the effects of these chemicals and flood the body. Stimulants will give a person extra, even excessive, amounts of energy, relaxants will relieve tension, and pain relievers will bring about euphoria. Whatever the substance of choice, it counters stress in some form. 

Many people self-medicate for underlying physical or mental conditions. Others take them to fit in with a social group. As a writer, you need to ask yourself a very important question: Why did your character first start taking this substance? That will inform you about why they continue. Are they escaping pain? Quieting anxiety or racing thoughts? Do they need to take it to fit into their social group? What happens when they stop taking it?  

Addiction is an illness. It is a medical condition. Treating it as a matter of willpower is to doom a person to suffer. There are effective medical and psychological therapies that, especially when combined, can provide a way back to health, sobriety, and thriving.

Cravings

The important thing to understand about these substances is that the high always goes away. The emotional payoff of that first use is never achieved again. Each subsequent use has diminished payoffs and the after-effects are worsened. This is because the body is a fantastic accountant and will produce less of the mimicked substance because, hey, there’s an excess here. So your character will crave the substance in order to just feel baseline normal. 

Withdrawal

Don’t underestimate the fear of withdrawal. It is an uncomfortable and sometimes life-threatening set of physical symptoms. 

The degree and nature of the symptoms will vary depending on the substance, the amount usually consumed, and the length of time it’s been used. Caffeine, for example, will trigger headaches. Alcohol withdrawal can include shakes, nausea, seizures, and damage to the brain’s memory and balance systems. Opiate withdrawal can cause anxiety, nausea, muscle aches, and insomnia. Read up on the specifics of the substance your character is using. Be sure to use reputable medical websites. I’ve listed a couple in the resources section. 

People want to avoid withdrawal and will use substances to ease those symptoms, thus feeding the addiction. Again, there are medical interventions that can soften the withdrawal and support the patient through this medical crisis. 

Recovery

People with addictions can sometimes respond well to treatment and have a low risk of relapse. Others are not so fortunate and will bounce in and out of recovery. 

Fear of withdrawal is one reason. Another factor is developmental. The younger a person is when they start taking a substance, the harder it is to stop. This may be due to learned coping mechanisms, changes to the developing brain and body, or a combination of the two. 

How old was your character when they started taking the substance? Who introduced them to it? Was it a parent handing them a beer at age five or a pain pill at age twelve? Was it friends at a high school party? Or did they start in adulthood? This will inform their likelihood of recovery and how hard that path will be for them. 

Struggles to quit, or why does this person keep relapsing?

Withdrawal and cravings are part of the reason it is so hard to stop an addiction. There are medical and psychological therapies that can help. Rehab is a major industry in many countries. There are also several obstacles to overcome. Cost is a factor in places without universal healthcare. Then there is denial. Many people with addictions don’t believe they have a problem. And when they do, they may feel shame if they live in a culture where addiction is seen as a matter of willpower rather than a medical condition. 

How do friends and family, employers, and others in the community treat your character? Does admitting to addiction mean they are admitting to weakness?

Another social factor is that it is hard to stop an addiction if the person doesn’t change their environment. Friends that also use that substance will enable and even encourage them to start using again. Places can be strong behavioral cues. Can an alcoholic walk into a familiar bar and resist ordering a drink? 

It’s also important to remember that substance use is often a coping mechanism for stress. What happens the next time your character encounters a stressful situation? How do they resist reaching for their addictive substance if they haven’t learned other ways of coping? Do they trust or remember in the heat of the moment that they have other options? 

Do your research

Here are a couple of my go-to sites for reading up on addictions and treatments. 

Spirit Lake Wellness is a non-profit dedicated to educating the general public about health and wellness. They have a podcast, booklets, and a YouTube channel that covers a range of topics, including addiction. All information is available for free. I am fortunate to be on their board of directors and reached out to one of the doctors we work with for this article. 

The American Society of Addiction Medicine is another excellent resource for learning more about addiction and treatment. 

written by Kimberley Long-Ewing

[vendetta-if]

What kind of mother would Yvette have been if she had raised MC? Strict? Soft?

And would she use her powers to make baby MC stop crying? What will Victor say to this?

Hmm 🤔 That’s a good question. This is if she decided to marry Viktor and her career didn’t end up rising as high as it is in the story (since she wouldn’t be focusing as much on it as she would’ve otherwise and probably because of her being married as well).

I feel like she’ll be one of those parents who tried to live or continue her legacy through her kid. She hopes that MC can become the famous superhero she could’ve been once they grow up.

She’ll take MC to various age-appropriate parties and gatherings with other elites and rich people in the city. It’s never too soon to start networking 💅💀 Funnily enough, I think in this AU, little MC would’ve most likely met and probably befriended Skylar too.

Of course, Viktor won’t be too happy about all of this. Sure, he’ll entertain bringing MC to these gatherings every now and then, but not too much. He kinda prefers a more private life with his family (just like the other Morozovs). So, I can definitely see that being a source of friction in their marriage.

Just like a lot of things she does, she won’t be outright strict with MC. She prefers to be soft but can be quite demanding and stubborn. For example, if MC doesn’t want to do something, she’ll keep trying to convince MC that it’ll be good for MC until MC finally relents or Viktor steps in. So, yeah, that’s going to be another source of contention between the couple.

But despite it all, she really does love and care for MC. Maybe with time, she can become a more understanding mother.

As for whether she’ll use her power to make baby MC stop crying… Yes, she’ll use it often at first since she’s been using her empathy power for a lot of stuff from a young age, it’s like second nature to her and sometimes, she doesn’t even realize she’s using it. Plus, she doesn’t see the harm or anything wrong with it since she’s using it to soothe her poor baby instead of letting them cry.

Viktor will be totally and vehemently against it though. When he finds out, it may be one of the rare times he ever gets truly mad. He’ll make sure to explain to Yvette why it’s fucked up to use her power on her own kid, even if it’s for something as innocent as soothing them. He wants to nip that habit in the bud before she keeps using it as MC grows up.

It’s kinda sad and tragic to see that even in this AU, it seems that Viktor’s and Yvette’s relationship is not really as smooth-sailing or ideal as the two of them thought it would be. Their marriage would be rocky, at least in the first few years, but it’s nothing that some couples/family therapy sessions and civilized discussions and conversations between the two can’t solve… I hope.

[fanby-fckry]

You know what, I’m just gonna say it. I think that Alastor being aroace is part of the reason he’s so shippable to me.

Before you come at me, check the flag in my pfp; I’m aroace-spec.

Maybe it’s me projecting, maybe it’s because I love exploring relationships through an aroace lens, but goddamn. I ship him more than any other character and every time I do, his aroaceness is a major component in the ship.

Examples below the cut because it’s gonna get long:

📻🍎 || RadioApple:

There are so many versions of this dynamic and I am here for all of them.

We have the pre-canon kinky QPR that I show in UH3. I could talk about that all day, but to summarize:

Aroace x genuinely respectful allo is a dynamic that heals my soul.

Lucifer is less tied down by human constructs like amatonormativity, having never been human himself.

The Devil values consent.

Kinky cannibalism, kinky cannibalism, kinky cannibalism, kinky ca- *I am removed from the stage with a comically large hook*

Then we have the Evil and fucked up QPR dynamic:

And of course, trying to get along for Charlie’s sake and eventually bonding over their shared love of dad jokes and musical theatre, both being violinists (yup, Alastor plays violin too, check the wiki) with niche hobbies/interests (ducks, furby organ) and accidentally winding up in a loving, healthy QPR.

📻🕸️ || RadioDust:

There’s something about an aroace and a sex worker who very rarely falls in love.

Angel would know that Alastor isn’t with him for sex, would know that he values Angel beyond his body.

With greyro Alastor, Angel and Alastor would both be inexperienced with romance, but in wildly different ways. Angel has never had a healthy romantic relationship and therefor tries not to fall in love. Greyro Alastor has probably experienced romantic attraction like less than three times in his 100+ years of existence.

And if Alastor never gains romantic attraction for Angel, that’s a whole other level to the dynamic.

It’s got some great angst potential with Angel wondering if he’s not good enough to love romantically or Alastor feeling guilty or confused as to Why It Hasn’t Happened Yet when he cares for Angel so deeply, and eventually it gets resolved with the two of them accepting that their attractions don’t have to match up for them to love/appreciate/care for each other and they smash the amatonormative relationship hierarchy as queer platonic partners.

Or, Angel’s just totally cool with it from the start because he’s spent decades in the kink scene and has potentially been exposed to more relationship anarchy than Alastor.

Kink and queerness have a great deal of historical and cultural overlap, and that includes aroace queerness. Because Angel’s had way more canon exposure to both, it’s possible he knows more about Alastor’s orientation than Alastor does, and I love the idea of Angel introducing him to terms or just being super chill about not labeling things.

📻♥️ || RadioHusk:

Drawing like 90% from pilot dynamic and headcanon on this. They’re just two old men. They get drunk and cuddle. Alastor is one of the few people who knows Husk can purr and takes advantage of this fact. Alastor considers Husk a friend in a fucked up, possessive way. Husk considers Alastor a pain in the ass, but does care about him on some level.

It’s Fucked Up and Evil QPR: Remix Edition.

And the versions where the author puts them through fanfic couple’s therapy and actually gets them into a healthy point in their relationship? One where Alastor no longer owns Husk’s Soul? *chef’s kiss*

📻🌹 || RadioRose:

For me, personally, this is an exclusively nonsexual, non-romantic ship. They’re besties; they’re QPPs. They’re married for the tax benefits and so that they cannot be forced to testify against each other in court.

Rosie knew Alastor was aroace before he did and rather than sit down and explain it to him, she decided to make ace puns.

📻🖤 || RadioSiren: [edit, context here] RadioFemme

Ok, so this is entirely based on non-canon-compliant Lilith. Or, I guess, non-series-compliant Lilith. More of the old WOG stuff from the pilot era, with a healthy dose of headcanon for flavor.

I love the idea of Lilith and Lucifer having an open marriage; I love the UH3 style polycule dynamic.

Lilith being the original seductress and Alastor being aesthetically but not sexually or romantically attracted to her is very near and dear to my heart.

I’m an aroace with a voice kink who is aesthetically attracted to Lilith and I think Alastor is an aroace with a voice kink who would be aesthetically attracted to Lilith, ok?

📻📺 || RadioStatic:

I’m gonna be real with you, 90% of my interest in RadioStatic is in the one-sided version where Vox is a pathetic little incel simp and Alastor is either oblivious, mildly annoyed, or finds the whole thing hilarious.

Whenever there’s any reciprocation on Alastor’s part, I always imagine it being in a very aroace, very Alastor-esque way. He needs to be get something out of it completely unrelated to sex/romance. And he needs to be manipulative and sadistic in the process.

Whether that something is kink-related, a business transaction, or simply the quality entertainment provided by Vox being a cringefail TV-headed little bitch, I love to see it.

[stitched-mouth-vs-the-world]

can you do a gideon graves x gn!reader? any hcs (sfw or nsfw) about anything is fine :3

Dating Gideon Graves Would Include…

Pairing: Gideon Graves x GN! Reader.

Summary: Read the title.

Warnings: Both SFW and NSFW (sections are separated: SFW is first), You take Gideon to therapy because he needs it, Gideon is selfish, Oral sex, 69 position, Mentions of cum, Face-sitting, Face-fucking, Aftercare is necessary!

Writing Time: 30 minutes.

Word Count: 716.

A/N:

I think I went on a rant here… but it’s ok. Hope you enjoy!

—-///—-

SFW

• Dating Gideon “G-Man” Graves… woah.

• You must be bold or something.

• If you’re not, I have no idea what you’re doing.

• Gideon is a little shit, most of the time.

• He loves to tease.

• He wants to see his lover look up to him with tremendous trust, respect and admiration.

• All things I think partners should look at each other with, but Gideon can definitely take it too far at times.

• He wants to submit to him in all ways.

• He’s your saviour and your kind, without him you would be nothing.

• Not very healthy at all.

• For example, he expects you to constantly ask him for permission for everyone.

• Generally he’ll always say yes and laugh at you even asking.

• But if you ever think you don’t need to ask, you’re wrong.

• Do something he’s always said yes to before without asking him prior and he’ll be upset.

• Gideon has got major issues.

• I think you could convince him to go to therapy, both on his own and with you (couples therapy).

• But it might take a couple asks.

• And when you do convince him, he’ll think he’s basically sacrificed himself for you.

• One session and he thinks he’s a new man and YOU owe him for going.

• Will absolutely expect some kind of reward.

• Gideon is a weirdo too.

• It’s normal for him to hang around outside while your taking a shower, kind of weird.

• Won’t join without an invite but it’s still weird as hell.

• Gideon loves to watch you do anything tbh.

• Cooking, cleaning, brushing your teeth, go to work, work, come back from work…

• The little everyday tasks everyone does is just a little more interesting to Gideon when he sees you doing it.

• He likes it if you watch him too, it’s kind of a weird form of love to him.

• Your therapist calls it abandonment and attachment issues.

• Gideon thinks that’s BS and claims he just loves to look at you.

• Which he does, but your therapist is still right though.

NSFW

• Most ‘rewards’ Gideon expects demands are sexual.

• You shouldn’t have to be even told to get on your hands and needs for him after he’s gone to therapy for you.

• Your place is either besides him or underneath him.

• Gideon’s preferred position is 69, don’t fight me on this on.

• In this position, you both get pleasure.

• And despite how selfish Gideon can be, he does want you to feel just as good as him.

• When he’s forcing his dick down your throat and slapping you in the face with his balls, you must surely be enjoying it just as much as him, right?

• And obviously he’ll go down on you afterwards, because that’s only fair.

• Gideon gives oral real lazy though.

• Expects you to just sit on his face but be careful of his hair and face.

• Gideon has definitely flipped out before and killed the mood when you once accidentally came on his face.

• Only in his mouth, inside of him or away from him where it won’t make a mess.

• But obviously he cums all over you, whenever he wants to.

• That’s one of his selfish needs.

• Gideon is surprisingly great at aftercare.

• He will bring you a towel or carry you to the shower, whatever you want.

• Clean you up himself and the toys too if you use them.

• And bring you some tea or water as well.

• Then cuddle you when your both all cleaned up.

• After sex is one of the rare times you’ll see Gideon being kind.

[911lsbts]

ENTERTAINMENT WEEKLY: The episode starts with Tarlos in therapy. How long do you think this problem has been brewing?

RONEN RUBINSTEIN: Season 5 picking up a year since the finale of season 4, I think that justifies the amount of time that it would take for a relationship to start getting a little rocky. I think it wouldn't really make sense if we came back immediately after the honeymoon and things started to go south. For me, it was just really trying to understand where Carlos is coming from and knowing that, yes, TK has his wants and his needs — but at the end of the day, it's always about "How can I be the most supportive, loving, caring husband?" And I think that's just TK as a person. He's done that for his father, for his mother, for Carlos, for all of his firefighter comrades, his paramedic comrades, and all the patients out in the field.

So TK is not necessarily upset with Carlos...

I think the stress and anxiety for TK doesn't necessarily come from, "I'm not feeling seen, I'm not getting attention." It's more of "I'm really scared for my husband and he's hunting down some really bad people that could lead to a really, really scary situation, might even get him hurt." I would be curious to see which one of them suggested we try couples counseling. I would like to think it's TK, and it just shows how incredible their relationship is that Carlos would agree to do it. I think they're obviously so madly in love, and so committed to each other, and they know that they're going to need some extra help in order to figure things out.

And their anniversary gifts show the therapy worked.

It just shows how beautiful these two are and how much they care and love each other and just how uniquely different they are. I think that scene is a perfect example of that. It seemed like it turned out to be a beautiful anniversary.

So what's next for Tarlos?

Well, [TK's step-father] Enzo and [half-brother] Jonah coming into their lives is going to throw a massive wrench into everything. What's cool about the Enzo storyline is it's something I've been asking for and daydreaming about since season 1, since I learned that Enzo was actually the person that raised TK. We're going to have so many questions answered about that dynamic, and we're going to find out even deeper about the dynamic between TK and Owen [Rob Lowe], which you kind of feel like you know everything, but we actually don't. And I think it's going to come to a head of actually what went on with TK and Owen when he was younger. So I'm really excited about that. It brings such an incredible scene between Rob and me. And then with Jonah, that's going to ask a lot of questions. I think a lot of things that the fans have hoped for and have feared, I think that's coming.... You'll know exactly what I'm talking about when that episode airs.