#confession corner
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Test testing oh yay words!!!
Hello HELLO and welcome to my blog! I'm Sun! Also known as Sunny, Sunrise, Sunnydrop, any name starting with Sun really- but most people seem to call me Sunpea!
Here you can confess to me, whatever that means, or or or just interact with your favorite daycare attendant! Moon helped set this up as a fun pastime since I apparently "don't have many of those".
So let's have fun ^^ Just make sure to follow the rules~
🌻 THE RULES
Play nice in my daycare! This includes no harassment, vague posts about people, and especially no name dropping
We have a strict don't like don't read policy! Ship and let ship!
Keep things,,, what's the word- SFW? Please and thank you [Canon typical violence/dark topics is fine but nothing sexual]
Be patient with me, I'm not going to comment on every general confession, and there are some asks I may not get to at all
[Confessionverse Sunpea is not the same as canon eaps Sun! Any lore that differs from the show is a feature not a bug]
🌻 TAGS
#confession corner - Confessions
#sunpea speaks - In Character Responses/Posts
#arts n crafts - Art
#theatre - Roleplay
#peas in a pod - Moonpea ...Friends? Sun, Moon, Eclipse, Lunar, Bloodmoon, Solar-Flare, Solar, Earth, Ruin, Nexus, Miku, Solstice (Dark Sun), Killcode, Puppet, Foxy, F.C., Charlie, Crescent (Lord Lunar), Phobos (Servant Eclipse), Ekleipsis (Swap Dimension Eclipse), Red (Swap Dimension Sun), Satellite (Swap Dimension Solar), Frank, Funtime Freddy, Glamrock Ballora, Glamrock Bonnie, Orion (Lord Eclipse), Sirius (Servant Sun), Stitchwraith, Sunlo (Moonless Sun), Vincent, Zenith (Lord Bloodmoon), Suncraft (MASM Sun), Mooncraft (MASM Moon), Netherite (MASM Eclipse), Trappist (Evil Earth), Computer
Credits
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Confession: I respect Tom & Zendaya's relationship and I KNOW they're end game. But I want Tom to D*CK me down so badly. Like I know that short king is packing and is good with his hands. Respectfully Zendaya. Love y'all both. ☺️
Rofl!! 🤣😅
NOW we're getting down to it!! 🤣
Now this is what I call a confession lol 😆 👏🏾👏🏾
Z should just have days where she lends Tom out to the fandom rofl 🤣 🤭
Jkjkjkjk!! I respect and like my girl too much to suggest that lol.... 👀👀
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Conceal, don't feel, don't let it show.
[First] Prev <–-> Next
#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#lan wangji#lan xichen#You can practically hear LXC's emotions vacuum sealing back into his body when LWJ tells him about wanting to bring someone back to Gusu.#This *is* a confession of both having feelings for someone else and also and admittance of terror at such feelings.#And honestly - can you blame LXC? Knowing how to respond to people in emotional turmoil like this is a skill that few manage to master.#There is a part of him that is so genuinely happy that his brother has fallen for someone!#And there is a part that acknowledges that LWJ needs to come to his own conclusions about this all.#Hence the extremely restrained reactions! He is so in his brother's corner that he's accidently clipped through the wall into another room.#Sadly that's how it goes sometimes...We want to be there for people in the best way. We give them space and hope for the best.#But space can leave someone isolated and alone. It heals some emotions but it makes others fester.#The fact that LWJ is at the point he's open about what he's feeling (even a little bit) means that it's a Big Deal.#LCX is just as bad with his own emotions. He only knows how to keep things in his own heart down.#There isn't anything he could have said. There *were* better things to say but does he have the capacity? No.
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Respectfully, I am starting to feel like I’m never going to get Taylor swifts music. I have tried to get into it and I can be weird with music sometimes. I often need an entry song to understand it before I can really settle down with the body of work but I’m at a loss here. Obviously I know all the words to the radio big hit stuff but I can’t make it through an entire album. Her range of music is very diverse so I don’t get how none of it hits with me.
#Confession corner#I wish I was kidding#people at work are genuinely upset I don’t listen to her#Terrified to tag her name so I don’t get bullied off the platform
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Actually wondering how long would it have taken Hua Cheng to confess without his Fanart Cave being discovered.
#They already french kissed multiple times before that scene and HC was still shaking crying throwing up when his gege cornered him#though to be fair fx & mq did call him a prevert creepy stalker for it and he did think xl was running away for him so i get it#but was he ever planning to confess in light of the kissing and xl flirting with him??#tgcf#hualian#hua cheng#xie lian
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Jirgin save me. Save me jirgin
just for you i’m blowing away the dust and making the gears turn in the old thinkerio again
tumblr fucked me over by deleting a whole paragraph when i turned on my data so now i’ll try and recount
with james being the only virgin in the friend group he’s obviously getting teased about it, it’s a running joke but! nobody else outside their small circle knows if they’re really joking or not because james is hot and it’s almost too ridiculous to be believable that he’s never had sex. because he looks fucking delectable and is also super charming and popular. and so when regulus joins them at uni and starts hanging out more and more with his brother he is Constantly subjected to the topic in some way or another and he just Wonders…okay. he’s a noisy younger sibling, sue him. and it’s aggravating how much time he his mind spends busy on the subject at some point oh and then start the dreams. regulus dreams of a tight space, dark nooks and crannies that two bodies are shoved into, all panting breaths and broken moans and too tight pants with no real space to grab properly. but it’s so hot and in the dream it smells like james and it sounds like james but regulus never manages to get a real glimpse of a face. he just wakes up drenched in sweat or stomach down and pressing his hips into the mattress. and then he goes about his day and to makes matters worse sees james. about campus, in the cafeteria, at his brother’s flat.,, what infuriates regulus even more is that from then on out he starts getting flustered around james whenever they’re interacting, all warm cheeks and hitched breaths.. to the point where he makes the active decision to instead of being in rather elicit the state of embarrassment. and so starts regulus’ flirting agenda, touching james too much and in places that’s bending the boundaries of their vague relationship (which is barely being friends at that time by proximity of sirius). he learns rather quickly that a perfectly timed raised eyebrow or a derisive look down his nose is the fastest method to fill james’ cheeks with color and that blinking up at him through his lashes or the tip of his tongue playing with lips is the easiest way to get james to lose track of his thought mid sentence. and it’s too fucking easy almost and it’s so horribly addictive to the point regulus is so consumed by the power high it gives him that he doesn’t realize how his original plan of getting the subject of james’ sexuality out of his mind is completely failing
#and then one day when he can’t help himself cornering james the poor guy breaks down and confesses with a semi in his jeans#when all that regulus had done was play with james’ necklace and suck on the straw of his drink#the jirgin chronicles#virgin james#ino tag#jegulus
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I woke up this morning still thinking about Fadel waking up in Style's bed.
I wonder what was running through Fadel's head as he turned to look at Style, eyes still squinting against the too-bright morning light, the unfamiliar comfort of the shape of Style's name on his lips for the very first time. I wonder if he was too sleepy to process how strange it was that he didn't really mind being pinned down by the weight of Style's thigh thrown over his hips; that the sensation was grounding and reassuring rather than being confining or suffocating. I wonder if the thought crossed his mind that he wouldn't mind waking up like this again, wouldn't mind letting someone into his space, wouldn't mind giving someone the bared vulnerability of lying naked and unprotected with all the implications of unwavering trust that has -- not if it was with him.
I wonder if Fadel registered the way his heartbeat is steady and calm despite the strange surroundings and unfamiliar bed, because something in him has already labelled the person lying next to him as safe.
I wonder if Fadel even understood that this, right here, in all its quiet and unacknowledged stillness, was the moment he fell in love?
#the implications of a trained assassin whose own parents were murdered in front of his eyes and who has been burned by love before#CHOOSING to stay the night and then waking up naked and vulnerable and being ABSOLUTELY CALM AND AT PEACE with it!#yeah i'm calling it -- THIS is when fadel actually fell in love. it's why the rest of the episode gives us:#fadel being able to say out loud “i want him to accept me for who i am”; because a part of him already felt like style HAS#fadel telling style “you don't have to do anything to impress me”; because style has already earned the right to fadel's trust and heart#fadel answering style's plea of “promise?” with a kiss because he'd just lied to style with his words#so he tries to tell style the truth with his body instead#because he doesn't realise that a single phone call would be all it takes to turn his reply into an unintended deception once again#the heart killers#the heart killers the series#fadelstyle#fadel#thk meta#fadel meta#thk ep 6#hui talks thai bl#hui talks thk#i've been staring at this particular screenshot for a while and the way there's NO CONFLICT AT ALL on fadel's face just...#*sits in the corner with my head in my hands*#you guys are probably all really sick of me by now#I know I’m somewhat reiterating my point#but it hit me that this really is LOVE now…like I’ve been holding off on that conclusion for so long#because episode 4 gave us a confession of frustration#and episode 5 gave us a confession of fear#but this episode is fadel finally recognising the the has truly fallen in LOVE#and that makes epsisode 6 so much worse because it comes because fadel thinks style doesn’t love him in return
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anyway i dont care about actor drama but some of you decided that jensen ackles was homophobic bc he didn't drop to his knees and suck the dick of every supernatural blog on tumblr circa 2014 and instead of keeping that misinformation to yourself you decided to project it onto dean winchester instead which is why we keep rehashing the "no, dean winchester/jensen ackles is not homophobic" conversation every five months on this hellsite
#i literally left the fandom about three months after the destiel confession bc 'homophobic dean winchester' was such a prevalent take that#you couldn't escape it in any corner of the fandom like it didn't matter who i blocked#remember when everyone was saying that the call between kripke and jensen was about making dean bisexual and that jensen was being bigoted#only for the entire fandom to find out like a week later that they were lobotomizing him into filming the shitty finale#yeah that's every week on this site#watch the sodium intake#spn cast#supernatural
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I think this moment in 15x15 is doing something bad to Dean's psyche. It was just... such an (underappreciated?) psychological blow.
First, Dean was obviously waiting up for Cas and Jack. It's adorable.
But notice: Cas was leaving without saying goodbye again. Here, Cas's panicking, his keys already in hand as he rushes out to find a (heroic) solution.
///
Hearthbreakingly, Dean actually asks where Cas is going twice in this scene. He can't hide the anxiety creeping onto his face when he asks.
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They make small talk about their daily works. Cas twirls and pockets his keys, but there's a blink-and-you'll-miss-it moment where Dean tracks the movement of the keys with nervousness:
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Dean forgets himself in the small talk, still laboring under the false promise, that the unethical plan will get his freedom (and everyone else's). There's a millisecond of happiness.
THEN.
There's a big HUH??? He does the little head turn, the same one he will do in 15x18
//
Dean's anger rises, just a bit, alongside the panic.
The music swells and Dean, always clued in to when something is wrong, begins to get scared because Cas is scared. He flicks his eyes down to Cas in a panic, trying to understand what's happening, to him, to them.
//
There's a familiar sense of confusion and disbelief here, not wanting to believe the bad news Cas is delivering about leaving, about Jack, and visually and beats-wise, it's so soooo similar to how 15x18 goes down when Cas tells him the bad news about the deal and the goodbye.
I actually think this is the moment Dean's mental health sails right off a cliff. Of course it's going wrong. Of course good things don't happen to them. Of course.
#spn 15x15#spn 15x18#spn despair#spn disguised the truth#spn the truth#dean/cas#dean/cas + love confessions#dean/cas + i love you#dean/cas + the dungeon#spn bobo berens#He needs Cas's support at home#maybe even more than he needs Cas on the field.#in sparing him and going out to work cas actually weakened them i think#at home alone and floundering dean worsens#dean needed help and support#specifically here he needed the emotional support of his actual partner#now before you get mad .... cas is not obligated to stay he's doing what he thinks is right#but them being off in their own corners has never worked#dean is so desperate to be free from violation from voyeurism :(((
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JS REMEMBERED I NEVER UPLOADED THESE WHAT DA HALE!!!! Helo housemdblr.............. baby i have genuinely missed u What old men are we going crazy abt todaye <3........
#ALSO HAIIII MY INSTAGRAM IS @thestarlotus IM MORE ACTIVE THERE#FORREAL NOT BEGGING FOR FOLLOWERS IT WOULD JUST BE AWESOME AS HELL TO HAVE MORE HOUSE MD FANS IN MY CORNER OF THE INTERNET#Must confess that housemdblr has my heart doh im sawry...... </3 The grammers js cannot match the insanity of house md fans on here#AND I MEAN THAT WITH SO MUCH LOVE IN MY HEART#I love u............ crazy old man yaoi fujoshis in my computer#gregory house#james wilson#hilson#house md#house md fanart#remy thirteen hadley#eric foreman#robert chase#ducklings#< mostly hilson tho...... sorry this old man yaoi cocaine be hitting#johan's scrapbook
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suonire week / day 6 - confession
(read L←R)
#wind breaker#nirei akihiko#hayato suo#suonire#suonirei#suonireiweek2024#it's a confession.....of a break up#am i stretching the prompt? probably#listen the idea sounded better in my head#college au theyre roommates dating since hs but nirei feels guilty bcs he cornered suo into a relationship lol (he liked him first)#they talk it out and continue dating do not worry!!
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CONFESSIONS
Confessions aren’t easy.
Owning up to your wrongdoings,
Vocalizing them,
Hearing your own voice e-c-h-o a declaration of truth.
Which permeates through your soul..
It hurts..yes,
But the pain is temporary.
There is purpose in the pain.
FREEDOM
From guilt/shame, condemnation and hopelessness.
A bird set free.
#deep poetry#relatable quotes#poetry#aesthetic#poem#sad poem#spilled thoughts#poets on tumblr#the tortured poets department#truth#spilled writing#spilled poetry#spilled words#spilled feelings#spilled poem#spilled truth#seek truth#confession#tell me im wrong#original poem#poetic#writers and poets#poets corner#poetsandwriters#female poets
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Confession Sunday - honestly wasn’t a big fan of Z’s b’day outfit this year, like the horse print was just not it for me. Just to think she’s had some absolute stunners of outfits which she’s refused to share with us (looking at you, LBD she wore at Darnell/Tom’s birthday last year 😭)
You have good eyes Anon, cuz I just thought it was a pattern lol 😆
I thought the outfit was cute! 😁
Sexy sexy fit. ��🏾
But hey, I'm like you ... that outfit she wore for Tom's bday was 🔥
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tapping the sign that says: IF the confession / dean reciprocating is going to be something further explored in the revival then jensen / anyone involved cannot make definitive statements abt dean's feelings or destiel's reunion until it's actually shown. it would be spoiling future arcs or getting ppl's hopes up for a specific outcome that they don't have the authority to promise yet.
of course jensen is going to continue to give vague / deflecting answers. the only thing they CAN canonically speak on IS the confession because that's what's already happened. jensen can also speak on his acting choices in that scene, like how he's previous talked about where dean's headspace was at when he was sitting on the dungeon floor after.
but they literally can't be making Official Statements abt if dean reciprocates or how their reunion will play out bc we likely will be seeing that on screen and to speculate or talk abt it would potentially spoil what they're planning (since the revival at this point is pretty much a WHEN not IF scenario)
#once again ppl jump to the worst possible faith interpretation abt things said at a con#jensen literally ALWAYS gives vague / neutral answers bc he's professional and also is pushed into a corner where most times#he really Can't say anything definitive#like misha? he can say cas's confession was a romantic declaration of love (bc it was) and that cas is queer bc that happened#jensen still cannot comment on anything definitive abt dean's sexuality or dean's feelings toward cas#vic.txt#fandom
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No thoughts, head empty. Just sitting on Cabernet’s face and riding her till her eyes roll back in pleasure and drool leaks past her lips…
Better yet, imagine doing 69 with Cabernet. I bet it’s one of her favorite positions because not only does she get to eat your pussy and see nothing but your pussy in her face, but you get to suck her off and finally relieve that poor cock of hers that’s always neglected during sex.
#⛓️ inmate confessions#cabernet smut#ptn cabernet smut#you guys don’t understand#I need the most rough#feral#sloppy#messy sex with cabernet that the bedsheets rip off the corners from her roughness
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Howwwww did you angst the world tour?? 🎀
this question made me giggle so much oh i'm glad you asked :3c there was so much yummy grian angst in the hc world tour!
it's all about grian and his penchant for destruction. he doesn't even mean to! he's not trying to be pesky; quite the opposite. he's curious but restrained, trying to be good, trying to follow instructions. he's not malicious at all! he's just there to see what people were up to, open and friendly and curious, eager to look and learn and praise. not a bad intention in sight... and yet things seem to break wherever he goes. everything he touches goes wrong.
the guilt churns, acidic and overwhelming, and grian's miserable. why is he like this? he's trying so hard, why is this the only way he can ever be? why can't it stop?
spoilers for grian's world tour video below <3
plantie pointed out to me how, during the tour of scar's train, when grian got rid of scar's arrows—the glitched ones that doc put there—he was so desperate to point it out after scar just glossed over it. as if he wanted to show that he can do something good. he can be helpful, he can fix things instead of just breaking everything.
but then we have all the other things, right? grian can't escape it.
when he was with etho and the mushroom farm exploded, he sums it up in a wretched if confused apology: "i'm so sorry. the two times i tried to use it, i broke it :( and created a water source floating— which i don't know how it happened— and flung the TNT, which i really don't understand—"
they move on, but it's so clear it lingers.
etho isn't blaming him. he's amused and brushes it off and moves along, unbothered, but grian himself can't wrap his head around it. about that propensity to breaking things, even unintentionally. the way nothing is safe around him.
he tells etho: "i can't stop thinking about your mushroom farm. why does everything i touch break, in new and unexpected ways?"
(not to mention when etho's showing him frogger and grian plays, almost instantly etho goes: "uh-oh, the game's broken", with a little huff of laugh. it wasn't exactly tied to anything grian did, but still something i wanted to point out, since grian was there for it <3)
and then grian goes to zedaph, right?
the very first game zedaph shows him. the very first. grian plays the way he was told to, the way he was meant to, and— he breaks it.
zedaph just laughs and moves them on.
(just sprinkling in a side note that zedaph's furnace minigame also didn't seem to work the way it should've—)
by the time grian gets to pearl's, it's starting to be a pattern that's so clearly eating away at him, making him anxious. he doesn't want it to happen again!
and yet.
pearl invites him to play her wordle game, and grian mindlessly goes and pushes the wrong button trying to start it... instantly stepping away with a quiet groan of a dread-filled "...oh-" followed by: "i just— ruined it already."
there's something about the mood switch. the way he seems more restrained and tame, silently upset with himself, trying so hard not to mess things up further. questioning why this is happening again. why he can't stop making it happen.
he walks over to the reset game button and asks, carefully: "can i press reset? is it gonna hurt? 🥺👉👈"
pearl reassures him he can, with a sigh noting that it'll just take a while.
there's an almost hysteric laugh from grian, followed by an exasperated, upset scream. "everything i touch breaks! when i went to e— i broke etho's thing when i went to— not frogger, his— his mushroom farm i— it blew up."
"you blew up his mushroom farm?? how? what did you do?!"
"yeah, i— i broke zed's game, instantly, pretty much, it's—"
"oh my gosh :("
"sorry 🥺"
pearl is quick to reassure him, though. "well, luckily for you, this is— you doing that (pushing the wrong button) does not break the game. it's just, you now have to wait for it to reset."
she makes sure grian knows that he didn't mess up anything terribly here. he didn't break pearl's game. it's okay! it's fine!
and then grian right clicks to open the book, and instead makes bonemeal pop out of a composter.
i think at this point pearl is a little bit taken aback by how wrong everything really seems to be going around grian. she makes sure to say, "it's fine," again, just so grian won't start worrying about it all again. "you're clicking on everything that people do not usually click on today. but it's okay. it's still not broken! it's not broken, it's alright, it's okay— i've got failsaves for people like you."
it's so sweet how she really tries to soothe him— and yet she can't help but let out that last remark.
people like you.
those few words surely lodge in more than all the reassurances. they're like splinter, proving grian right.
eventually, he gets to skizz.
during the tour of skizz's base, skizz shows him a horse statue and starts talking about how he lost his first horse at an event that grian was also a part of. and grian's stomach instantly sinks.
he asks hushedly, a bit confused, trying to remember: "was i there?"
skizz laughs. "you were absolutely there, dude."
which leads grian to ask, uneasily: "did i do it?"
skizz waves his hands, quick to easily reassure that no! that's not it, grian didn't do it!
grian lets out an oh with such palpable relief, and goes on to explain about how, "i remember witnessing it, but sometimes it's hard to disentangle whether i did it or not. coz i tell you what, on this tour i've broken everyone's stuff."
nobody was upset with grian when things broke, but here he is, several hermits down, still unable to leave it to rest. because it's him. it's him who did all of that, somehow, and he didn't mean to, but it doesn't matter. it happened anyway.
and now he can't even tell what is and what isn't his fault anymore.
the guilt is deep rooted, leaving anxious assumptions and dark, jagged precipices. how much did he destroy? what else should he be feeling guilty about? how far does this go?
he keeps breaking things, and it's such a blur that he can no longer tell what is and what isn't his fault.
the tour continues, and he delves into skizz's pyramid. and it's just— it's just a tunnel to swim through. nothing to mess up, besides potentially dying to suffocation, right?
and yet you can hear skizz shrilly exclaim: "oh he's going to end up breaking something!!"
and, (plantie's words: ) grian hearing that and just wondering, is that all i'm good for? is that all i'm known for? is that all i am?
there's no room for doubt; not really. that is what grian does, all the time, whether he wants to or not. he breaks stuff. he just— he doesn't mean to. and this tour is one big show of how powerless he is against it. (how everyone expects it from him anyway.)
despite it all, grian perseveres, trying out skizz's game, stubbornly dedicated and trying to win. (to pass; to have something to be proud of, at least—) and he gets to the powdered snow section.
there, he jumps across to a pathway that he was meant to circle to through the snow instead.
it's not breaking anything, not really. not even the rules. it's not cheating! he's just— he just did something skizz did not expect, but that was entirely possible within the game's design, even if not intended. he exploited it to his advantage; a risky, tricky shortcut.
and yet skizz remarks with a laugh: "this is what grian does! he breaks games!"
no matter what grian does... is that all he'll ever be?
is that all they'll see?
he fails getting through skizz's game, is thanked for play-testing, praises it all, they talk it all away, and...
and then grian goes to tour mumbo's base.
and fails to even die properly to his llama—
and then mumbo shows him his archive machine, and instantly panicks when grian gets curious about it, begging him not to touch anything. and grian says: "your stomach just fell through didn't it?" and after mumbo's immediate agreement, he adds: "and rightfully so. coz, almost everything i've touched on this tour has broken."
there's not a sliver of surprise to mumbo's anxious rushed: "yeah, yeah yeah! please stop now." because, of course things have broken. of course what grian touches is bound to go wrong. of course—
and then mumbo very carefully tells grian what to do with the machine.
grian does as he's told.
mumbo looks up and pauses, a frown crossing his face as he takes it in. he notes that grian probably did it too fast—
(something went wrong)
(something broke)
mumbo says: "i can't believe you come along and every single thing in my base starts [going wrong/breaking/malfunctioning]"
and then grian mysteriously ends up with an extra book from mumbo's machine, much to mumbo's dismay. grian's confused, cogs spinning as he tries to figure out what did he mess up this time to result in this.
it's clear mumbo wants grian away from his machine. it's not safe. (grian isn't safe.)
"maybe just give that to me and maybe just step away from the contraption. and then— maybe just leave me to—"
grian's upset and bewildered voice cuts in: "i didn't do anything wrong this time :(("
he's trying so hard.
he's trying so hard to be good and do things right and not mess anything up.
(it isn't working.)
(it's never bound to work, is it?)
mumbo ushers him away, and ends up showing him another cool invention—an elevator. except the second mumbo hits the button, a creeper shows up and explodes it. (it's midday.) (it wasn't even meant to be there.)
this one isn't grian's fault at all, but with everything that's happened— well, it's easy enough to link it to grian's presence. like a bad luck omen.
apprehensively, grian asks if the elevator broke, and mumbo—a bit bewildered by the reality of it—says that no, it seems to still work. "amazingly," he tacks on, disbelieving.
grian's relieved. "ohh, i thought we were in big trouble there!"
besides himself, mumbo anxiously agrees: "augh. i was like, if every single creation that i show breaks in some fashion, i'm just gonna quit."
because this isn't normal. none of this is, least of all everything at once. it simply doesn't happen.
(not when grian isn't there, anyway.)
mumbo notes that he needs to work on his lighting, and grian nods wisely saying it's a perpetual issue, but the anxiety is digging its talons in now, unrelenting. (what else is going to go bad in grian's presence? what else will he mess up? what else will he break? why is he like this?)
another remark that comes after this is mumbo's nervous: "i've actually just built up the automatic sorter which does this—which you're not gonna touch. we're banned from touching any redstone contraptions!"
and what can grian do but oblige? (but he can at least look, right?)
but does it ever change anything?
does it matter?
-
at the end of the day, the others don't think too much about it.
they all say their part, pass their judgment, wave their hands, dismiss, move on. it doesn't keep them up at night.
... i think it might keep grian up at night.
a cacophonous collection of word snippets, aimed at him or woven around him, digging under his skin until it bleeds. a noose of inescapable fate, a tightening band around his chest that promises he can only ever be one thing:
a vessel for destruction.
it doesn't matter if he wants to be.
shackles and chains and a cosmic inevitability written into his skin, etched into his bones, tangled into his bloodstream. and an ever-rising guilt like stormy sea, far above his head now, drowning him.
(maybe he's not meant to be near other people and their things.)
(maybe he's not meant to touch games that were constructed with so much effort and love and passion poured into them.)
(maybe he shouldn't—)
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bonus screenshots from discord DMs (with extra sprinkles of hmtb mentions):
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bonus hmtb quotes because i kept thinking about it:
He always destroys the things he loves most, after all.
and:
He destroyed everything he touched, and when there was nothing left, he destroyed the only remaining thing: himself.
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#ange answers#ribbon anon#grian angst#i might've gotten a bit rambly - this wasn't meant to be so long it just sort of kept snowballing the further i went. oops#anyway grian's such a good vessel for guilt#because he internalises it and holds on#even if nobody else holds a grudge#even if nobody else blames him#(and yet in all the little remarks - do they really not hold it against him? isn't there proof enough that clearly it matters to them too?)#(so how could he ever be absolved?)#for them these are just some random events#but for him it piles up and piles up and piles up#into an undeniable pattern that stains his hands like blood#and he can't wash his skin free of it#he can't escape it#no matter how hard he tries#(and yes it does tie beautifully into hmtb grian and his own perspective on things and struggles and how he deals with guilt)#(the keyword here is: badly) (he deals with the guilt badly)#i also went to think about other things like the tunnel bore incident and SL mumbo and WL zombie skizz and-#just so many instances of grian guilt you know?#it builds up until it's indisputable and inevitable#and grian is cornered by the reality of it (with nowhere to go)#think about it:#grian feels guilt over things he feels he has no control over (because it doesn't matter how hard he tries)#and we know grian thrives on having control#(just throwing that out there)#something about how grian keeps wretchedly confessing it to everyone - that he already broke many things#like tacking a warning sign on himself so they'd know to step away and save themselves#(and he's so scared it'll happen again. so scared that it'll keep happening. so scared that it'll never stop—)
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