#complex ptsd vent

[forestvnts]

they were so cruel to me. but there's nothing I can do about it; it's done and over with. so why does it still hurt so damn bad?

[rainywhispersblog]

[borderlesbian]

i don't want to heal i want them pay for what they did

[hello-friends9500]

[youwillleaveme]

i can’t and shouldn’t have relationships, ever

[traumabody]

all i wanted in life was love and now i am terrified of it

[lostmf]

[maine-pluralmind]

'Having D.I.D isn't just about silly alters!'

Thats correct it can also be;

Scattered amnesia that makes you question your own existence.

Alters moving objects when you thought you were in control and then freaking out cause it wasn't YOU.

Clothes hoarding to the point its a problem cause you feel like theres someone in the system who will wear it/ get upset if you throw it away.

Having a alter talk to you in the mind and keep you from having a panic attack.

Hearing a persecutor threaten you in the middle of a mental breakdown about something else.

Having alters/persecutors who hold trauma so bad that you can't look at them. Or having alters/persecutors who hold trauma so bad that they continue to act on.

[cccat-in-a-meat-sack]

me, with both:...

[sage-hazeline]

how do you reconnect to life after being disconnected for so long

[wowlookwhosspirallingagain]

i forever will be grieving the childhood i could have had if my parents healed themselves first before having a child

[vacant2007]

[rainywhispersblog]

When you grow up in an abusive home, you don’t become a people pleaser to please people. You become a people pleaser to keep the potential for more abuse away.

[borderlesbian]

i've never got the time to be a child and now that i grew i'm a child in the body of an adult

[hello-friends9500]

[neuroticboyfriend]

time with complex trauma is like. i need to do everything all at once and if i don't i'm a failure, even if there's nothing to do. three months ago feels like yesterday but i can hardly remember yesterday anyway. i'm running out of time. for what? i don't know. i need everything to slow down but my life is so stagnant. i can't go to sleep because the day can't end, but i need the day to end or i'll go insane. i'm constantly worrying about the future but it feels like i have no future. i'm running out of time. for what? i don't know. time has no meaning but every second is the end of the world.

or is this just me?