#but this post isnt about that so i'll keep it to myself
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fellas is it gay to steal your best friend's jacket with his last name on it?
#lord please let them kiss in the next volume#maybe during a tense mid competition locker room break? mayhaps while everyone else is preoccupied with their own drama?#mayhaps so we see harvard's complex over being a good captain and an insight into how their relationship impacts aiden's fencing??#and LORD let seiji give aiden advice this time. and nicholas harvard!!!!!!!! or vice versa#bc like nichoji are kind of chilling for the first time since vol 1 now someone help aiden who is drowning in the middle of the ocean#gay people are so dramatic (i am gay people)#also praying hoping dying for nicholas robert interaction I AM GNAWING AT THE BARS OF MY ENCLOSURE#but this post isnt about that so i'll keep it to myself#ok manifestation is done#fence comic#aiden kane#haiden#inspired by my fic paradise in your eyes of course#because i am nothing if not self referential#nart#digital art#one day i will go back to my nichoji and eugesse and other pairs shitposting. today is not that day
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im so embarrassed about talking to people lately. i feel like im desperately clinging to anyone i can and no one feels the same. which makes sense, i cant ask anyone to be crazy about me. i'd ruin it anyway
#log date.txt#this isnt about anyone in particular its just something that keeps happening#i just feel so fucking crazy#i rarely let myself vent about this kind of thing coz i feel like i'll accidentally hurt someone's feelings#despite these posts not targeting anyone in particular#so if we've talked recently please know this isnt about you#its about the concept that haunts my every interaction
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obsessively checking accounts that follow me/like my posts for hints of it being them bc I’m #scared & paranoid
#camera talks#sorry#I feel sick doing this#but like. what if it is what if it is and they can see my stuff again#I’d die. I’ll actually fucking crumple into a ball and die#I feel so pathetic#but I have such a thin veil of safety#i have them blocked on everything so virtually this is impossible#and what do you want to bet they dont actually care this much about this#but im actually so scared of them being able to see my posts. to talk to me again#this isnt a safe space technically. its social media i know but its my fucking safe space#god i dont know why my brain decided right now was the right time to set off the warning bells about this#it absolutely isnt the right time bc im never going to get to sleep now#im going to have a fucking nightmare about them again and im so so scared of that i cant do that#fuck. fuck what the hell.#i wish i could respond to things normally i wish i didnt think about things#vent#delete later#ignore this i'll be fine eventually i just feel really Off right now#and questioning everything about myself and the situation im in right now isnt helping#i love you guys.. sorry i keep putting vents on your dash
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r.une is so awesome! he's the kindest guy ever and I always drop by the thieves guild whenever I'm not doing anything just to hear his pretty voice
#ash rambles 💚#and he's handsome!#steal me away 🐉#ugh it's been so long since i've played s.kyrim#or uh. anything other than c.yberpunk#school keeps me busy and#i also got some wisdom teeth removed today! and two other teeth! it's... not the most comfortable! I'm trying to stay chill about it but#FUCK i miss solid food so much#anyways I'll try my best to get some sleep! I'm trying to downplay it but it's probably not a good idea to like. not rest after all that#so yeah if i havent been as activate as of late it's just a mixture of that + school + me trying to platinum cy.berpunk 2077#i think I'm at about 75% trophy achievement? which isnt bad at all#sorry i was talking about r.une#s.kyrim has ass lighting but. his eyes are actually green! i just think he's sooooo handsome!#I can't really kiss since my face is all swollen but i am mentally kissing him all over! he's just such a sweet guy! i know i ship with a#lot of men that are a little rough around the edges but. not him#he's just a genuinely nice guy#(ignorethat hes part of the thieves guild)#oh speaking of I've started to play o.ctopath 2 again. starting to drag myself out of my gaming slump#it's just... been such a crazy last few weeks. with school and life and my mouth... and the roadtrip in which our tire went kaboom in the#middle of nowhere.. everyone is okay but it's still definitely a moment that made me go 'what the hell is wrong with ash's life' LMAAAOO#gonna save that story for the grandkids! BAHAHAHAHAA#oh speaking of kiddos. i've been developing the kiddo for s.eifer a lot as of late! her name is selena + she wields a gunblade like her pap#and just like how her papa has a thing for s.quall (/hj) she has a thing for s.quall's kid LMAAAOO#ah shit it's almost 3am.. I'm gonna go to sleep! i should rest after today#good night my friends#or. well. good morning. since you know. it's so late ajdkahsjq#I'll get back to the regularly scheduled f/o posting eventually <3#your knight until the end 🤍#also also I've been reading john koenigs the dictionary of obscure sorrows and annotating it like the nerd i am. fucking hell it's so good#apologies to all my friends who keep getting spammed with me analyzing it LMAAAAOO y'all are the best
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neurodivergent but in the opposite way from what I see a lot. "neurotypicals are always using unspoken social rules and cues instead of just stating things clearly and actually saying what they mean like neurodivergent-" brother I am playing 5 dimensional chess with multiverse time travel
#i hate that post thats like ''neurotypicals blah blah blah use your words'' because let me tell you. im neurodivergent#& i Can Not Fucking use my words. my brain is scrambled I dont know what to say I can only throw things down & hope ppl are picking them up#joyousposting#sometimes I feel like. manipulative because I'll say stuff with the specific intent of getting someone else to say this thing in response#(with a large amount of certainty they will)#but all that ever is is like. getting them to ask a specific question because my brain cant Say What I Want unless prompted by a question#example: lets say I want to talk about X. I'll bring up X then be like theres this Thing about X knowing someone will probably be like#oh what is this Thing? then I can say what I want about X#trying to get other people to say what I'm thinking but not to persuade or manipulate them into thinking like me but to point at and go#yeah that thats what I mean but couldn't communicate#if left to myself I do this where I keep talking to try and properly convey what I'm trying to say without ever feeling like I successfully#do so and in fact make things more confusing#Your neurodivergent brain go roundabout ways to link seemingly unrelated thoughts mine throws them all at once at me at several branching#paths#slash j ik im not the neurodivergent who does this#this isnt a vent btw
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Sorry to keep throwing Miscellaneous Asks your way, but I finally had a moment to get my thoughts in order on one of the points on your Venn diagram I wanted to talk about! I always kind of debate whether or not to send other, semi-unrelated long asks like this when we've already got a chain going, but oh well. I'll try and address anything brought up in response here in the main one and hopefully it doesn't get confusing lol.
So I was thinking about the extent of Jo and Arakawa's relationship. It is completely true there's not much you can say that's concrete, especially since most of what we see is from Jo's perspective. Although his perspective is crucial to forming an understanding of their relationship, it's not sufficient. This is particularly the case because, coming back to giri-ninjo for a moment, Jo is largely bound by giri; it's clear his loyalty runs deep, but it's not a choice for him.
Arakawa, on the other hand, can choose who he places his trust in, especially early on. And I think it's incredibly important that, despite having men who've already been with him from day 1, men who've already been helping him with his son, Arakawa chooses to "place every confidence" in Jo (per an old Famitsu profile, one of the first official ones) and chooses to make Jo his captain.
Similarly, he kind of chooses Jo "over" Ichi in sending Ichi to prison "instead of" Jo. Perhaps the family really would collapse without Jo's talents, but… does it have to collapse entirely? Didn't Arakawa make it pretty far on his own? I guess it's neither here nor there, but I've always wondered if things would've really played out as feared if Jo went to prison instead. Not to understate Jo's role in the family, of course.
Anyway, I think that trust shows not only in overt gestures such as entrusting Masato and the family's finances to Jo, but also in more subtle behind-the-scenes ways, such as what we were talking about before with regard to New Year's 2001. There's also the fact that leaking information to Aoki was Jo's idea; for that to be the case, Arakawa would have to discuss Aoki's threats at length with Jo. (Unrelated, but come to think of it, "complying with him [to] make him see value in keeping us around" is very often the strategy of victims of abuse and neglect…)
And this one's an underrated detail many people miss, but after Arakawa shot Ichi, while he was able to come up to Ichi to tell him he's counting on him and sneak in the fake bill, if the goal was to not arouse suspicion, I don't think he would exactly have been able to excuse himself from the dinner to drive Ichi to Yokohama. Time was of the essence in terms of Ichi's survival, so that leaves Jo, who was conveniently already at the scene and who was certainly in on the "secret rule" that constitutes part of the Arakawa Family's agreement with the homeless camp. Overall, there is a pattern of Arakawa approaching Jo before anyone else, isn't there?
Sort of branching off of that, I would personally feel comfortable saying that Jo knows Arakawa better than anyone else. He seems to know details about Akane and New Year's 1976 no one else does, details Arakawa would have had to volunteer himself, and that plus his own experiences are what allow him alone to have the most complete picture of that night.
I also get the impression Jo understands Arakawa better as a person than anyone else--certainly better than Aoki, but perhaps even better than Ichi in some cases. There are multiple instances where he defends Arakawa and challenges their perceptions of him--that he's "betrayed" the Tojo Clan, that he's betrayed Aoki, that he's the type to scheme and make power-plays behind Aoki's back. He hasn't. And, despite how little Jo's "allowed" to say, he turns out to be right every time. Also worth noting Arakawa does something similar in asking Ichi to try and understand Jo's frustrations, though he's more or less enabling Jo's abuse in doing so.
Lastly, The Smallest Detail that drives me kind of insane. Them arriving at the office in the back seat of the same car in one of Ichi's flashbacks. I wouldn't think too much of it if it were any other time of day, but the first-thing-in-the-morning quality and the fact Jo isn't driving (thus it's not as an act of service but as an equal) is like… Okay. You're carpooling to work. And if you're not carpooling, you're honest-to-god living together. What the hell.
So a lot of it is this web of inferences--it has to be, at least currently--but I really do think there's a lot to chew on. More than meets the eye, anyway. I've also been stewing in all of this for years, especially since drafting Jo's relationships section, so I might just have inhaled the fumes for too long lol
Thank you for coming to me about the nature of their relationship! Although I did put it down as being more-or-less 'uncertain' on my chart, I do agree that their relationship isn't as cut-and-dry as other relationships might be (it's going back to appreciating the complexities of RGG relationships, especially in the case of the Arakawa's where for every party involved it really IS complicated)
I wanted to exclude making any definitive statements on things that couldn't be verified without making a detour on the original post (I know I already mentioned frequently that Arakawa is able to joke about Jo being 'softer' on Masato, but I do think about their relationship often and the implied depth of Jo's loyalty if- as you said- he was able to climb through the ranks of the Arakawa family much quicker than preexisting members), but there are clear points in the game that due allude to a great trust between the two (and I also note that carpooling detail during Ichi's flashback- or at the very least I know I'd find myself noticing Jo sitting in the back opposed to the front/driving). It's definitely not hard to assert that Jo knows Arakawa well either, it's hard not to come to that conclusion when we have evidence from the game to infer that.
#long post#fave#i should prob come up with an actual tag for these asks so i can easily find them and not sift through my other fave'd posts#ill do it in the morning im right about to go to bed but i just saw this pop up on my notifications#and well. we know me i've been presented an itch i have to scratch LMAO#snap chats#i feel a bit silly now- i know that their relationship isn't exactly. 'uncertain' but i didnt want to put that so i didn't appear#hmm.. i dont know the word for it.#i guess because it's not AS blatant as daigo and mine's relationship was#i didnt want to make it appear as though i was saying theres more when there isnt?? tho there definitely is..#its a little evident i Am interested in the depths of their relationship so i promise ive thought about it#maybe i just wasnt sure how to exactly word it.. though in review the way i worded it on my chart#wasn't HORRIBLE. to most standards anyway i think however it definitely undermines the bond they have and for that#'ashamed' is hyperbolic i feel like someone would say so we'll go with 'embarrassed' to meet in the middle#but thats the benefit of peer review isnt it- just to help catch your mistakes or to help reaffirm ideas so im grateful!#but x2 again in review im a silly coward for doubting my gut on that#tho i sort of do want to torch that post- i wont tho. it's not supposed to be SUPER deep just very quick notes#so i guess i'll save the Deep Dive on jo and masumi's relationship for a future post. is what ill tell myself to keep myself sane#thank you for compiling- i suppose i'll call- their moments together !#it's a great way to keep track of every important note on their relationship that i hope people will take note of if they havent
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And on the topic I just have to rant about Bruno's characterization in this fandom. Listen uusually i dont give a fuck about mischaracterization for the simple fact that I am so used to it and it will happen inevitably. So i dont let it bother me But there are some examples in which its so egregious, that it feels like people watched a different show or something...
After rewatching Vento Aureo it just blows my mind how the fandom got to this, weird, "mommy bruno" thing this state for his character that is hardly even present in canon. Its strange because when I was younger and i first watched it I kind of subscribed to it too, i think just by seeing people act that way it cemented itself in my mind as fact But rewatching it now, its so obvious that its just MISSING his entire character, and so many little details and aspects of it that the show makes quite Clear!
Its not just the fact that he is so young. But that bothers me too I wish people acknowledged that hes barely an adult. People act like hes 30 or something HE'S TWENTY he's BARELY AN ADULT okay and I Know he acts older than he really is and maybe that's why people mix it up, maybe people haven't seen his age on the wiki, but don't they state it in the show ?!?! Either way, the thing is that's Literally a canon element of his character, he DOES act older than he is because he HAS to he HAD to grow up so much earlier than everyone else he has to act more responsible than even the 22 year old on the team because that guy just cant step up like he does And hes had no other reliable figure to guide him ever since he was young it was only Him and he had to become entirely independent at what fucking 12 years old.
Right and wouldn't it just be really cool if people actually took that into consideration? That he's so young he's tired that maybe he's JUST as scared as everyone else on the team and he feels lost and confused too but he just CAN'T let that show because he's the ONE person who is keeping the team glued together? And Giorno yes he stepped into his place — Which is its own sort of tragedy to me, that the 15 year old had to follow in Bruno's same steps of growing up too soon because no one else could manage things like he does and he has only himself to depend on now while running the Entire Italian Mafia — but either way it's just the way this attitude of his is brushed off as Mommy bruno mama bear hes such a mom 🥺🥺🥺 Is almost insulting? And i wont even get into the gender role aspect of that, some people have discussed that before too, that in contrast with Abbacchio who is the "father" (nevermind that he can barely even take care of Himself, and is cold to his entire team, not a great example of a father is it) is mischaracterized too for the sake of woobifying Bruno! Also hate this as a Bruabba enjoyer but thats another discussion entirely
And the last thing that puzzles me is just, that he doesn't even act close to being motherly in canon. Maybe save for the Trish thing, and the thing with Narancia's backstory, which is indeed him caring for younger people But due to what i stated previously, he HAS to and Id bet he feels compelled to. I wont deny that he is kind and he doesnt want kids to lead a life like his, because that's literally a part of his character that they show. But I think people are forgetting that he fucking beat up a 15 year old immediately after meeting him, then didn't even invite him to his gang: GIORNO did that HIMSELF, Literally went "you Will let me join your gang. I will join it' now." and bruno was like Okay. And the thing from my previous post, is that they literally canonically show that Bruno does act detached to his gang, not... not the other way around. See why this characterization misses so much. He doesn't have TIME to build any particular bonds with his gang Yes he is kind to them of course he is But like the scene of Abbacchio's death where he orders everyone to just go on because they don't have time for this even though he's just as distraught, or Trish feeling frustrated that he acts so cold, he puts some sort of wall between him and the gang even if it's subtle. Narancia even says he knows this about Bruno, that he knows him because of his past with him he noticed that Bruno PUSHES people away because he doesn't want them to go down the same path he did, not because he is their "mommy" it's because his life is fucking MISERABLE and he is a kind person so he doesn't want that for others, especially not younger people because HE was in that same spot too so YEAH okay he cares about kids WHO WOULDN'T What kind person would want to let a child down his lifestyle... This displays his kindness and virtue as a leader, not his. """"Motherly instincts"""".
Okay. I don't know, I just wish the fandom left room for this sort of nuance to his character. I have never seen anyone bring this up. It's always people just making up this completely different Bruno than the canon one, I understand why people confuse this. I used to as well, when I was young and many people in this fandom are, but fuck, it would just be nice if people took this aspect of him into account, because I think it's interesting! Its so much more interesting than going Aww Mommy Bruno he loves his kids (ugh) and completely ignoring the rest of his character! Just... a thought !!!!! Or several !
#jjba#txt#long post#Im not trying to sound like a stuck up asshole here#I dont hate people who see him this way#like I said i get why its common in the fandom#I just wish that. People could see past that. Bevause I feel like the intricacy of his character is Right there#canon isnt hiding it. And i never see it explored. I wish people explored it more#Or i'll just keep doing it myself#Well anyways this is part of why I think Bruno is awesome. I never even realized i likedhim so much but its always subconsciously been ther#also analyzing characters and their minds is my legitimate favorite thing to do for every piece of media ever. so i want to do it more from#so i hope you dont mind this sort of ramble from me#<- I will keep doing it either way. So i hope you don't#im starting to feel embarrassed about this now though so who knows#b#um#hm do i put this in his character tag#ok no i dont wanna get fucking Morbed so i wont
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:/ fighting with my partner atm. We rarely ever do and if we are fighting its over this very thing. I got real close to breaking up with them. Its so hard to weigh how I feel and what I should do here. I just want to take a nap. I'm so tired. But I'm at work and when I get home we have to finish talking. I just want to sleep before thinking about all this any more. That last half hour of my shift energy boost better fucking be enough. It never feels like it will be but I always get everything done somehow.
#-Cass#fighting about me asserting my boundaries again#eventually they became more coherent & kind but FUCK man.#every time I say -hey I didnt want to experience this- they go at me with the I'll die without you dont leave me#but I put my fucking foot down on all of that shit. just kept saying stop doing that until they communicated with me properly.#& it worked eventually#I feel okay about where we left off but I still dont know what to do from here#I cant keep giving them chances but I can tell they're getting better#which is really the problem at the center of it all#their best isnt good enough and I hate to ever tell someone that#but fuck man. its my autonomy we're fucking with here. I think I deserve a say!#I just know that breaking up with them is complicated. and I dont want to do it if I don't have a plan.#and I dont want to do that if they really will stop hurting me#but it just keeps happening.#and I keep trying to tell myself its not that bad. I keep almost telling them its not that bad. but I know how bad it is!!#its sobbing on the drive home & sad playlists & relapses & keeping bad company just to have something they cant touch#& crying next to them in bed after they fall asleep & not being able to move at all for 20 minutes this morning#because I was so fucking startled by the situation & didnt know what to do#honestly getting in the way of work with this was what pushed me over the edge tbh. my job is important to me.#not to mention they are unemployed again! so I'm The Income of the household#whatever. whatever. its all nonsense at this point. making myself a second coffee and doing dishes now bye#i will be removing this post later but it stays up for now in hopes someone has something comforting or helpful to add#+ so I can feel heard I guess? bleh
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Bruh
#the way . I am crying over a pizza delivery driver dumping my pharmD ass#he was sooooo stinky i miss him 😭😭😭😭😭😭 i knew he was going to end it i knew he would#be the one to end things I was head over heels but he was like 🧍#I want him to bleed lowkey but i'm normal. He was a good guy just immature at times and i think he saw i'm a#cold stone bitch with her life together making 4x he does. so he was like Ok ur future is bright i dont#want to waste your time im not good enough. but its whatever I'm pretty cool and normal#Just been crying a lot#Its cool though. seriously.#I mightve posted about him once or twice Yes i hated him at first bc i was scared once i realized he isnt#scared of me being a bitch to him i was like Ok he seems to actually want to break down my emotional barriers Ok and i#fell in love... then he's like Nah. and Ii'm like Oh Yayyyyy#I serioisly dont know how anyone handles anything#it was literally only 5 months i met him via bumble and we just dated since then but like. Bruh if#it was 12 mknths? 2 years? 10 years? I would actually kill myself no joke#anyway Fuck my life i'm good tho I'll continue slinging norco and percocet and adderall XR and#he'll keep slinging out those amazing fuckimg breadsticks witht he homemade ranch 🥲🥲🥲🥲 I will miss the#pizza from.his job where he'd get 50% off for me equally as much as i will miss him Fr FR.
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take care of YOU first⋆.ೃ࿔*:・🍭
taking care of urself ISNT selfish. its NECESSARY and in this post i'll talk about how to put urself first more without feeling guilty, cuz u shouldn't feel guilty for doing whats best for u…💬🎀
MAKE YOUR PRIORITIES CLEAR ;
make ur priorities clear not only to urself but also to the people around you. if ur priorities aren't clear to you then how are you going to make smart decisions? you need to know what matters to you. some of my priorities are (in this order)
♡ myself
♡ my future
♡ my education + family
everyone's priorities will look different and dont compare your priorities to other people's priorities, and dont feel bad if ur priorities are different from the people around you. honestly i think the only thing that should be constant (in my opinion) is that yourself should be at the top of ur priorities.
BALANCE COMMUNICATION ;
u shouldn't be bending over backwards to answer every phone call, email, or text message. if ur doing something, its okay to be like "hey im busy, i'll get back to you" and you shouldn't feel bad for doing so. thats just you respecting ur own time and doing what u have to do.
i dont rly have this problem cuz im not the best communicator but i do make an effort to get back to people when i can. and its not even like u purposely being unavailable for the people u care about, its just u doing what u need to do first and then getting back to people when u can.
CUT THINGS OUT ;
if u have someone in ur life who is simply taking up space and isnt pouring into u in the way that u are doing for them, then u can cut them off. for example guys who wanna be in the talking stage for a billion years, or people who just like to yap and waste ur time.
if ur not getting something out of a relationship or connection to someone else then u dont HAVE to keep them around. and ik that sounds harsh but people shouldn't be able to walk in and out of ur lives when they please, people shouldn't be able to take ur time and energy and not give anything back. u deserve friendships that are RECIPROCAL. connections with people that SERVE U.
INVEST IN URSELF ;
whatever makes ur life easier, better, healthier, whatever brings u closer to ur goals or makes u feel beautiful is an investment. that includes doing ur nails, doing ur hair or makeup. buying that dress, paying for that course, or paying a little extra for a wellness shot. INVEST in urself cuz you are ur biggest investment.
DONT LET PPL INFILTRATE UR SCHEDULE ;
dont get so caught up in showing up for other people that u forget to show up for yourself. make sure that ur managing ur time wisely and doing what u need to do before u go and say "yes" to invitations or hang outs with friends.
#honeytonedhottie⭐️#it girl#becoming that girl#that girl#self care#it girl energy#self love#advice#self concept#self improvement#self development#self growth#dream girl tips#dream girl#dreamy#dream life#selfish#self care tips#self awareness#girly#hyper femininity#hyper feminine#girl blogging#girl blog
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just a sagau genshin abt the newest banner (geo & hydro dragon my love) (the creator is self insert) LOTS OF OOC
a/n : written in rush cuz i randomly think abt this after knewing next phase banner and i hope i got both of them, i was gonna added about how i forgot ayato & childe exist when i planning on which dps from each vision should i pull, but they make no sense so i didnt include it.
"I didnt mean to look down on your choice, Your Grace. But, didnt your cousin says itll be better just to pull me...?"
You look at Zhongli with the most unserious, more like silly face, thinking about hes actually jealous of your choice on pulling for Neuvillette.
While it's true you need his shield and he would be the first Geo 5 star you have, but who wouldnt want a hydro dragon pure water tester PLUS a water machine gun to pew pew those enemies!
And more better? You have an unbuild Furina too!
"But my cousin also says he would comeback to genshin to pull for Nupi!"
If Zhongli able to curse, he will.
when will you also gave him a cute, silly lil nickname to him too?
"But like, Your Grace—"
"Shhsshhh"
You quickly shut him, putting your own finger on his lips, making a small blush creep onto the Geo Archon.
Zhongli can feel the side eye Neuvillette gave him as the Hydro dragon sips on his pure water.
"But, Your—"
Seriously, you never saw this version of him thats cant control his own usual calm demeanor, but the version you see is the impatient and insists that his opinion is the best.
Not like he's wrong though.
You put your own finger on you lips now and did a mewing pose, kinda making those two old dragon sigh.
whats wrong with this generation...
"Zhongli, hear me out. Nupi is a nuke, or else should i say Nukelet? Thats suit you isnt it?"
Neuvillette sighed again, but he didnt hide his chuckle about his Creator giving him more silly nickname.
"Pardon me, Your Grace. While it doesn't matter to me that you call me that, but I'm a dragon, not a nuke. I dont boom myself"
"But youre a boomer."
"Was that supposed to be a joke?"
"No."
Back to Zhongli. Hes still thinking countless reason about why you should pull for him.
I mean, his material is easier to get (even if youre the Creator and couldve just easily get everything you want), his talent is useful (SHIELD??? BIG PILLARS???? THROWING BIG ROCKS TO THE ENEMIES?????), he got many fans (BUT ITLL BE USELESS IF HIS CREATOR DIDNT WANT TO PULL HIM), he got many fanfics (HE KNEW YOU LIKE TO READ THEM AND HE WILL HACK THE TUMBLR TO SHOWS UP MANY FANFICS ABOUT HIM ON YOUR DASHBOARD BUT EXCLUDING THE HURT/NO COMFORT BCS HE KNEW YOU DESPISE THEM)
But then he come to a conclusion, as he clapped his hand.
"Your Grace, if Sir Neuvillette have Furina on your team, what about Xiao?"
Fuck he was right. WHAT ABOUT YOUR XIAO????? HE NEED HIS FATHER FIGURE!!!!
"Youve got a point..." you pose like the trade offer meme.
"So, who should i choose now? is it you, Sir Zhongli, or is it you, Monsieur Neuvillette?"
"Uhm, pardon me but, why dont you just get us?" ask Neuvillette, putting his cup on the table.
"Dont you think itll be better, Your Grace? You get two dragons and you also have their companions on your team."
"Monsieur, i dont have that kind of money. Im still in high school, heck, a boarding school! Even if i have guaranteed now, i dont think i can."
"But our banner started on your holidays..."
"Ok now you got another point"
"So, what you gonna do?"
"I'll take two dragon, please"
Perhaps Zhongli should thank Neuvillette for his suggestion.
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another a/n : i post this cuz im at my home, suffering from another sudden sickness (i keep getting nauseous and vomiting plus a bad fever & headache but idk what causes them can anyone tell me 😭) also i have a tooth extraction scheduled on Monday so yeah... wished my future self a good luck
#achi's#achi's writing#genshin impact fluff#genshin impact x reader#genshin impact imagines#genshin impact#genshin self aware au#genshin impact sagau#sagau#genshin x you#genshin x reader#genshin fanfic#PHASE 5.2 IS SICK#zhongli#zhongli x reader#zhongli x you#neuvillette#neuvilette genshin#neuvillette x reader#neuvillette x you#genshin impact x you
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im REAAAAALLY sorry for the likje longest wait ever but in the meanwhile i've wiorked on my oc too so i'll prob post abt it soon. sorry if this is short or bad but it took me a long time to get motivation to write this 😓
(this isnt proofread so if u see any mistakes dont mind them i’ll correct them tomorrow cause im too tired)
fem! reader btw
Daisuke never liked to rely too much on other people, he was always told how annoying he can be so that would make him even more of a weight than he already is.
Although he can’t complain when his girlfriend is the one who gets to take care of him. After what happened at the Tulpar you could see big changes in his attitude, he tried to smile at you but you can see that it’s not the same genuine lovely smile he used to give you in the past, when he was still on earth with you.
You were his girlfriend before he got the news from his parents about the internship and no matter how much you tried to convince him to not leave he still did, promising you that he’d come back for you. He wasn’t wrong, but this isn’t what you were expecting.
He had many scars around his body, barely able to move. He was put in a wheelchair for a few months, just until the scars have healed and he could get back in feet.
Daisuke’s parents found him a therapist, ignoring the boy’s wishes not to. Because after all he had you, you were the only one who he opened up with about what happened to all of them, about how guilty he felt for them. You were the one holding him in your arms after he cried on your shoulder for hours, you were the one changing his dirty bandages but most of all you were the one that loved him.
At nights like this you liked to wait until Daisuke was sleeping to leave him on your shared bed and go out your balcony to watch the sky filled with the city’s light, and when days were harder you took the hidden pack of cigarettes and light one up.
As you were watching the sky above your head you felt moving inside the house but didn’t think much of it, as it could be your pet just wandering around.
Your presumption turned out to be wrong as you heard your name be yelled from your bedroom, you quickly get inside to check on the voice and found your boyfriend on the floor. You run to him and slowly get him back on your bed. He pouts seeing your worried face checking for any damage.
“Are you okay? How did you get down there, most importantly why were you th-“ He stops you before you can bombard him with even more questions.
“I’m sorry Y/n, i just needed to drink something and when i saw that you weren’t here i tried to take it myself but i couldn’t...” You could see the disappointment in his eyes, you thought he might be feeling like a weight on your shoulders so you tried your best to comfort him.
“Daisuke look at me. You don’t have to apologise, it’s my fault. I should’ve been there for you but i wasn’t and i’m sorry about that. You shouldn’t force yourself to move too much, the doctors said that your body is still too fragile to sudden movements.” The boy looked at you, the mention of doctors saddened him.
“I’m so tired of these doctors, i sometimes wish you could be the one treating me instead. And the therapist girl always keeps trying to make me spill stuff, is it wrong that i don’t want to talk about it? She keeps asking about you a lot too, she might be thinking that you know more than her.”
“She wouldn’t be wrong, if it makes you feel any better i could try speaking with her.” He tiredly nodded at you and you both get back in bed, drifting off into sleep while holding him.
“Goodnight Y/n, i love you.”
IDK HOW I FEEL ABOUT THIS. i weote it in 2 hours so maybe that why its so bad and yea im so tired idek what im saying
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hi jonghomies ❤️ it's with a weary heart that i'd like to announce that I'll be closing this account for gif making (not leaving completely, please read on 😅). I started gif making in 2021 and the support, love, community, and fun I've experienced since then has been totally unrivaled. But all good things come to an end, don't they? 🥲 I'll give you some reasons for this change as well as some other info.
why?
for a multitude of reasons, the main one being I'm not into ateez as much as I once was. I do love them a lot, but these past few months I've grown distant from them for no particular reason. That's just the ebb and flow of fandom, I guess. I don't have enough energy or spirit to maintain an entire fandom account for them like I once did. Another reason is that kpop in general has become more toxic (for me); having to delete twitter was really a wakeup call for realizing my feelings about the overall industry. A third smaller reason is that tumblr isn't rly what it used to be, especially in terms of gif makers. The community used to be so vibrant and fun. I know that me "retiring" won't help the situation but I alone can't "save" atinyblr nor should I have to "bear the weight" for the sake of keeping the giffing community alive.
what's next?
I don't plan on abandoning this account! I adore my mutuals and friends I've made along the way and I'd like to cherish them. I'll probably still even reblog ateez, honestly, but only when I want to. I'll likely just keep doing what I'm doing but the only difference is I'm detaching myself from the label of ateez gif maker and I'll redesign this account's look (pinned post, pfp, banner, url, etc) to be less ateez centered. Feel free to keep using my tracking tag for ateez content, though i my not rb it (just because idk how active i'll be).
will you ever gif for ateez again?
who knows! maybe a new cb will drag me back into the pits of hell (affectionate), but maybe not.
if you've gotten this far, thanks for reading. I know I didn't need to write a post for something like this, but I felt like I should've with all the genuine work and love I've poured into this community. Every interaction, ask, tag, whatever -- I appreciated all of them, and I truly adored being your apple lady. this isnt a goodbye, just a change of scenes. thanks for the memories and i love u all ❤️🫶
-- anne
#ok to rb btw#apple lady words#tagging the mutuals so they can see </3#heyfio#lunanuggets#bumblebuzz#rinblr#forbritt#usertheos#hanaablr#anniehae#tuseral#soffeblr#useryeonbins#sarahlook#lavandulacosmos#userlinnea#forbelleseyes
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if you votes yes… GOOD NEWS!!! I made a bit of an oopsie
Storytime!! So a while ago I was messing around on Vograce (as one does) and I thought "hey, what better way to thank my friends for their support and treat myself than by making UtahLIVE stickers!" (you can tell where I'm going with this).
So I go and I order the stickers. Minimum order 5, it says. And I'm like yeah ok I have 5 friends this works out great. Submit order. Pay. About a week later I go back to check the status of the order and I do a little double take at the name of what I have ordered. Stickers (10pc). 5 orders. Now, im not a maths guy, but I at least know my times table and so I realize: oh my god, I just ordered 50 fucking UtahLIVE stickers.
I really dont want people seeing this and thinking "wow ok you totally just "accidentally" did that and this isnt some conspiracy to sell your shit" ITS NOT I SWEAR I REALLY AM JUST THAT DUMB
I genuinely don't know what to do with these. I dont even care that much about getting any profit back so if people are interested Id probably put these on Etsy for $1.50 - $3?
proof theyre real btw (miku for scale)
if this flops I'll… keep them in my desk forever? I joked about putting them on lamp posts around my city but I think id die of embarrassment if someone saw me putting one of these up. Imagine walking to a Starbucks and you see this….
PS! sorry for the lack of uploads :( I put a lot of energy into the big one and it burnt me out a bit + homework. Hoping to catch up this weekend <3 thank you for the patience
#utahlive#4th wall break#I need these fuckers OUT OF MY HOUSE#I dont have 50 friends#wilbur soot#wilbur soot fanart#dsmp#dsmp fanart#dream smp#dream smp fanart#dsmp stickers
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Dumbledore is a Manipulative Piece of Shit: Part 4/?
(part 1, part 2, part 3)
He knew and allowed Harry's abuse
Well, this is a pleasant subject, isn't it? Harry's abuse at the Dursleys' hands. And the worst part about it is that no adult in his life really seems to care.
I'll talk about the Weasley parents in a different post. This one is dedicated to Dumbledore and how he always knew about Harry's abuse and allowed it to persist. For years. Not just once, Harry started Hogwarts. No, I think Dumbledore knew what was going on at Number 4 Privet Drive long before Harry stepped foot in Diagon Alley.
And more importantly, I can prove it.
So, I'll cover my evidence according to the order of the quotes that appear in the books since there is quite a bit to cover.
And yes, I know Dumbledore calls the Dursleys out in Half-Blood Prince:
“You did not do as I asked. You have never treated Harry as a son. He has known nothing but neglect and often cruelty at your hands. The best that can be said is that he has at least escaped the appalling damage you have inflicted upon the unfortunate boy sitting between you.”
(Half-Blood Prince, page 55)
But this scene is the definition of "too little, too late" considering how long this has been going on.
So, let's start:
“Nah. Dumbledore gave me the day off yesterday ter fix it. ‘course, he shoulda sacked me instead — anyway, got yeh this.…” It seemed to be a handsome, leather-covered book. Harry opened it curiously. It was full of wizard photographs. Smiling and waving at him from every page were his mother and father. “Sent owls off ter all yer parents’ old school friends, askin’ fer photos… knew yeh didn’ have any…d’yeh like it?”
(Philosopher's Stone, page 218)
Hagrid can't keep a secret to save his life, we know that, and he isnt the brightest, with all his good intentions. Yet, even he noticed something's wrong with Harry's home. He knows Harry doesn't have photos of his parents, he knows he never got any gifts.
"But that's not Dumbledore,"
True, but Hagrid tells Dumbledore everything. So if Hagrid knows, Dumbledore knows.
“I told you, I didn’t — but it’ll take too long to explain now — look, can you tell them at Hogwarts that the Dursleys have locked me up and won’t let me come back, and obviously I can’t magic myself out, because the Ministry’ll think that’s the second spell I’ve done in three days, so —” “Stop gibbering,” said Ron. “We’ve come to take you home with us.”
(Chamber of Secrets, page 31)
“It was cloudy, Mum!” said Fred. “You keep your mouth closed while you’re eating!” Mrs. Weasley snapped. “They were starving him, Mum!” said George. “And you!” said Mrs. Weasley, but it was with a slightly softened expression that she started cutting Harry bread and buttering it for him.
(Chamber of Secrets, page 39)
Both these quotes from Chamber of Secrets show Fred, George, Ron, and Mrs. Weasley clearly knew what was happening. That Harry was being locked up and starved.
Harry really, never kept his abuse a secret and is quite open about informing anyone who'd listen to him about it. He is just used to it being brushed off as something unfortunate that nothing can be done about. The Weasleys, McGonagall, Dumbledore, Remus, and the entire Order of the Phoenix treat it as such.
In OOP, Harry references needing to duck from Vernon's beatings as a joke to Ron and Hermione. He wasn't keeping it a secret.
On the same vane:
She had no idea that Harry was not following the diet at all. The moment he had got wind of the fact that he was expected to survive the summer on carrot sticks, Harry had sent Hedwig to his friends with pleas for help … Hagrid, the Hogwarts gamekeeper, had obliged with a sack full of his own homemade rock cakes. (Harry hadn’t touched these; he had had too much experience of Hagrid’s cooking.) Mrs. Weasley, however, had sent the family owl, Errol, with an enormous fruitcake and assorted meat pies.
“Why didn’t you tell me you’re a Squib?” Harry asked Mrs. Figg, panting with the effort to keep walking. “All those times I came round your house — why didn’t you say anything?” “Dumbledore’s orders. I was to keep an eye on you but not say anything, you were too young. I’m sorry I gave you such a miserable time, but the Dursleys would never have let you come if they’d thought you enjoyed it. It wasn’t easy, you know. . . . But oh my word,”
(Goblet of Fire, page 28)
Harry wrote everyone he knew he was being starved. He wrote Hagrid and the Weasleys, and they all sent him food. The adults sent him food without bothering to ask him the important question: "Why aren't you being fed?"
(Order of the Pheonix, page 22)
This is the most damning evidence against Dumbledore.
He knew. He knew how Harry was treated his entire childhood because he had someone spy on him for years.
Mrs. Figg knew how Harry was treated by the Dursleys. She calls it: "miserable". She knew.
And she was sent there on Dumbledore's orders, meaning she was a spy. because let's be real, a squib, who can't do magic and doesn't own a gun can't do anything to protect Harry. She can only be there to spy. To report everything to Dumbledore.
This proves, more than any other quote here, how okay Dumbledore is with Harry suffering at the hands of the Dursleys.
Next moment he jumped as the lock gave a loud click and his door swung open. Harry stood motionless, staring through the open door at the dark upstairs landing, straining his ears for further sounds, but none came. He hesitated for a moment and then moved swiftly and silently out of his room to the head of the stairs. His heart shot upward into his throat. There were people standing in the shadowy hall below, silhouetted against the streetlight glowing through the glass door; eight or nine of them, all, as far as he could see, looking up at him.
(Order of the Pheonix, page 46)
The entire Order was there, at Number 4, Privet Drive. They've been following Harry since he got there. Tonks has seen Harry's bedroom. I don't think they missed something is definitely wrong. (I think this is why they tell the Dursleys off at the end of the fifth book and Dumbledore again in the sixth because someone else finally knew and Dumbledore had no choice but to address it)
And to make sure the Order is aware something's wrong between him and the Dursleys (that being an understatement), Harry outright tells Lupin:
“Excellent,” said Lupin, looking up as Tonks and Harry entered. “We’ve got about a minute, I think. We should probably get out into the garden so we’re ready. Harry, I’ve left a letter telling your aunt and uncle not to worry —” “They won’t,” said Harry. “That you’re safe —” “That’ll just depress them.” “— and you’ll see them next summer.” “Do I have to?” Lupin smiled but made no answer.
(Order of the Pheonix, page 54)
Harry makes it very clear the Dursleys don't care for his safety and that he never wants to return to literally everyone he can.
Why then? Why would Dumbledore want Harry abused?
“She’s evil,” said Harry flatly. “Twisted.” “She’s horrible, yes, but . . . Harry, I think you ought to tell Dumbledore your scar hurt.” It was the second time in two days he had been advised to go to Dumbledore and his answer to Hermione was just the same as his answer to Ron. “I’m not bothering him with this. Like you just said, it’s not a big deal. It’s been hurting on and off all summer — it was just a bit worse tonight, that’s all —” “Harry, I’m sure Dumbledore would want to be bothered by this —” “Yeah,” said Harry, before he could stop himself, “that’s the only bit of me Dumbledore cares about, isn’t it, my scar?” “Don’t say that, it’s not true!”
(Order of the Pheonix, page 277)
Harry said it best here: "for his scar"
In the previous posts, I covered how desperate Dumbledore was at the end of the war for a win, so much so, he might've forged a prophecy. And I explained he needed Sirius Black out of the picture for the same reason he wanted Harry at the Dursleys and wanted him mistreated — confident boys with a good support network and emotional regulation don't make very good martyrs.
In part 2, I mentioned how Dumbledore knew since the night the Potters died that Harry is likely a Horcrux. He has been manipulating Harry's life since then to achieve his grand plan of killing Voldemort. Even if it comes at the price of Harry having anything resembling a childhood and a life.
#harry potter#harry potter theory#harry potter thoughts#hollowedtheory#hp theory#overthinking#wizarding world#albus dumbledore#dumbledore analysis#the dursleys#petunia dursley#vernon dursley#hogwarts school of witchcraft and wizardry#harry james potter#the order of the phoenix#order of the phoenix#harry potter analysis#first wizarding war#second wizarding war#hogwarts
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Shut In (Eyeless Jack x reader oneshot!)
Basic plot: its really cold outside, and you urge Jack to stay in your home with you... he decides to stay despite knowing full well that he will be fine out in the freezing temperatures. You both decide to do things to pass the time and stay warm! Turns out Jack can make a mean cup of hot coco, too
Extra notes: I dont usually write fanfics, and the last one I've written was a personal one from late August... so to say I'm rusty and underexperienced is an understatement! I feel this one ended up a little.. weirdly paced imo but I think I'm still happy with the end result! Dialogue I feel I could have done better on but I'm going to be nice to myself since I mostly write hc posts so this is way out of my comfort zone.. Drafted on Tumblr then sent through google docs to pick up on some mistakes I missed, briefly reread no proper proof reading imo... lets hope this isnt a train wreck + it copied back to tumblr okay!! LMAO
Brief joke about pregnancy/making a pregnancy but its like one small snippet but I know that can make people uncomfortable + implies at least one of the characters is AFAB
Word Count: 2915
Extra Admin's note: I want to say again that I am so so happy about this blog hitting 1k followers, when I first started this blog I was originally going to use it to burn time and have something to do on the side, as well as having a place to put out my cringe ideas and hcs. I never thought this many people would be interested in my dumb thoughts, but here we are! I intend to keep writing this year, and perhaps even make more non-celebratory one shots this year? Maybe? I don't know I guess we'll see the reception on this fic!
It was the middle of the night, around the middle of January. Your boyfriend and you were holed up inside your apartment, you having locked the man up with you after seeing that it was below freezing out, as well as raining. You had to practically beg your boyfriend to stay with you for the night.
Your boyfriend, who also just so happened to be a man eating demon with tar dripping out of his hollowed out eye sockets. Your boyfriend, who was currently sitting still and staring forward, the only sound in the apartment coming from the dripping of your faucet. You had asked him to come visit you, it'd been a while... and he would never ever let you go to his cabin when it's this cold out. So here you both were now.
You pat the palms of your hands on your knees, sucking in one of your cheeks and working the flesh through your jaws for a moment. You were both technically stuck in the apartment now; you didn't want Jack to go out and risk getting sick, and Jack more than likely wouldn't want you to step out for the same reasons. So, you were both confined to what you already had within the space. You were about to open your mouth to speak but Jack broke the silence first. "You're shivering, do you want me to get some blankets?", blunt and almost robotic. He was never that expressive. "Or would you like to go to your room?" He added after a brief pause, his fangs poking just over his lip before he readjusted his mouth. You were both in the living room, sitting together on the couch; the front door to your left and a view of the kitchen to the right. You thought for a minute as your eyes lingered on the kitchen for a moment. You'd already eaten, before your partner arrived... but..
"That's fine, I'm probably going to make some hot coco," You pulled yourself up, stretching up. "Powdered stuff ooor..?" Jack mimicked you. You only shook your head, earning a disapproving look from him. "What?" You questioned, but he only dismissed you. "Why don't you get some blankets, I'll handle it," and he turned on his heel to make his way to the kitchen. "Maybe put on a movie, too, your choice." He added as his voice carried off. "Are you saying I can't cook?" You called back, following after him. No answer as he tugged out a pot. "I'll have you know-" you started once more
"Do you have half and half?" He was already opening your pantry to grab things.
"No, I don't,"
"Heavy cream? Whipping cream? Whatever it's called..." He mumbled as he placed various ingredients on the counter. Cocoa powder, vanilla, salt and sugar. You only nodded, and as he was about to begin working he paused. "Do you want anything else in it? Cinnamon? Nutmeg?" He paused and through gritted teeth, "Coffee?"
It was almost midnight, of course he would be opposed to you having caffeine so late.
"Cinnamon is fine," You watched him get to work. He measured everything out; even mixing the heavy cream with some milk to make a substitute for half and half.... was that really all it was? You weren't sure what you expected it to be, if it weren't..
He pulled his head up and stared at you. It was then that you noticed he had actually taken his mask off and set it at the end of the counter and out of the way. The black ooze dripping from his eyes was slow and posed little threat to dripping into your drink. He had a fistful of napkins on standby to dap his face dry should the flow quicken. "Aren't you going to get the blankets?"
You pat your hands on your thighs, pausing... watching him. His body had a warm glow on him from the old light bulb in the ceiling; it flickered every now and then. Under the yellowed light he almost looked healthy and alive, though there was no glint where his eyes should have been. His sharp nail tapping on the counter brought you back to the moment, blinking a few times. "Yeah.." you mumbled, defeated at the chance of making a drink for yourself stolen from you. But was that so bad?
You backed out of the kitchen, dragging your feet across the floor. Your apartment was.. a little on the smaller side so within a few steps you were in front of your bedroom door. You didn't really pay much attention to your surroundings as you shuffled through the blankets on the bed.. eventually you settled on just grabbing an arm full and waddling back to the living room, dumping everything you had grabbed onto the couch.
The house smelled of cinnamon and chocolate.. with a hint of vanilla.
Turning your gaze to the tv, your eyes scanned across the DVDs you had stacked messily. Nothing sounded good. "Is there anything you want specifically?" You called out as you settled yourself down criss cross in front of the tv and pulling all the cases onto the floor next to you. "Movie wise," You added as you pulled the first case into your hands. The DVD collection for Child's Play.. you had gotten it a few weeks ago, finding it on sale at your local store. You still hadn't popped it in to watch..
"I have.. Chucky, uhm..." You shuffled for the next case. "All the movies by the way.. I have that and.. most of the Friday the 13th movies," You called out. No answer, the only sound coming from the kitchen was the noise of a whisk gently being stirred. "I don't have Jason goes to hell... But!" You pulled out a third case with the Nightmare on Elm Street DVDs. "I DO have Freddy vs Jason," You mumbled and spread the three disks on the floor in front of you. Most of the disks you had, you noticed, were mostly older slasher movies. Still, Jack hadn't answered you. You pull yourself to your feet and trudge back into the kitchen. His back was to you, too preoccupied with the stove... He hadn't noticed you, not yet. An idea blossomed in your head, a smirk pulling itself across your lips. You steeled yourself, trying to force yourself to stop shivering.. Jack was always paying attention to his surroundings, this was a once in a lifetime opportunity.
You take a step forward and he still doesn't notice your approach.
Another step.
And another.
Jack wasn't the tallest, in fact if you wanted to you could rest your chin on his shoulder... and that's what you ended up doing, while wrapping your arms around his thick waist. You could feel his body seize up just a little bit against you, before relaxing. "You didn't answer, what sounds good?" You pulled your eyes down to look at the pot. Your drink was nearly finished. You view rocked as your boyfriend shrugged, still silent but the twitching of his pointed ears let you know he was listening.
"Anything's fine," Another shrug as he cuts the heat. "You're the one cooking for me, you get to pick the movie," You insisted. He paused mid-whisk, letting out a soft huff. Suddenly he spun around, his face just a few inches from yours. In the dimmed light his eye sockets seemed deeper, it's black ooze lazily dripping down his cheeks. You noticed the smudges on his face, from wiping the streaks. You briefly wondered what it was like to sleep with them, but your thoughts were cut short as he pulled a blackened and clawed hand to your hair; tucking a lock behind your ear. "How does...." He paused, sucking in his teeth. He looked almost embarrassed. "Bride of Chucky sound?"
"What? Want to study the characters again so we can dress up again this year for Halloween?" You tease. You had convinced him a few months ago to dress up with you. With him as Chucky, and you as Tiffany... It had taken some begging and convincing but you ultimately got him to agree. Although you didn't go out to get candy, you were both fine with staying inside watching movies together in costume. It was also that night you got him to watch the movies..
His ears darkened, before he scoffed. "No... actually this year I was thinking of..." He took a long pause, visibly scraping his brain for names of characters, before seemingly giving up. "Look I don't watch many movies I don't know any.. characters.." He grimaced, before gently pushing you off of him so he could turn his attention back to the hot cocoa. "We've still got nine months, more than enough time to come up with something..." You shrugged, then smirked. "Not enough time to make a Glen... or Glenda," You teased before turning on your heel. You held back a snicker as you heard Jack splutter, finally processing what you had just said to him.
"W-"
"I'm gonna go ahead and put in the disc, I'll leave it paused for you," You cut him off, still grinning to yourself as you kneeled down to do as you had said.
Soon enough Jack walked into the room with a mug, as well as a platter of cookies. "You didn't have to," You mumbled as you eyed the treats, but he only waved you off as he placed the plate and mug onto the coffee table. "You don't have to eat them, but I figured you might want a snack while watching the movie," He mumbled. You took the mug, and swirled the drink inside of it. "I hope I didn't put in too much cinnamon," Jack added as he watched you. He leaned over and started the movie.
You took a sip, smiling a little as the warmness crept in. "You did good, probably the best hot cocoa I've ever had." You offered a grin to him. "That has got to be the fakest compliment I've ever heard," Jack shot back, though you could see the corners of his mouth turning up just slightly. "Oh, I'm sorry! I believe this is the most decadent and satisfying beverage I've had ever been graced with in my life, and-" You began, only for Jack to hush you. "I'd rather you throw it on me, don't... say words like that again," He grumbled as readjusted himself into the couch. You took a sip and shrugged, "It's just absolutely immaculate," and he lightly smacked you on the arm. "I'm never making anything for you again," He snorted, before turning his attention to the movie.
You weren't going to lie, you felt a little bad treating yourself to the cookies, knowing Jack was unable to eat them without upsetting his stomach. Being a man-eating monster must really be hard. You purse your lips, and shoot a look at him from the corner of your eye. He must have been doing the same, because he turned his head to look at you. "Do you want to do something else?" He asked lightly, his grin from a few minutes ago already faded. "Do you ever miss eating.. food?" You asked before you could stop yourself. He didn't bother pausing the movie, instead he just fell silent and stared down, into the space between the two of you on the couch.
"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have brought it up, I know it's a touchy subject for you," You mumbled and put the mug on the table. You sucked in the air between your teeth, flicking your eyes up to the movie, before bringing them back down to your lap. It stayed like that for a minute before Jack broke the silence. "I mean... yeah, I do. But at least I don't have to eat every day like you do, means I can have more time to do what I want," He said. Clearly, he was still bothered, tip-toeing around the big.. thing about him. The air was still tense and thick, all of the previous joking gone now. It was nearly unbearable. Nearly.
"You know," Jack began after a few more seconds of silence when you didn't reply. "I've never tried cinnamon in hot cocoa, I didn't know that was a thing people did," He was changing the subject. "You haven't?" You asked, raising a brow. He eyed your mug, but you both knew there was no way he was going to take a sip.
"It's really good," You mumbled, and took the drink, "The combo, I mean," You added. He hummed, patting his knees lightly. You swirled the drink again, watching the... what was it called? Those lighter swirls in the drink.. Did that have a name?
"You've had hot cocoa before, right?" You asked. He hummed again, nodding his head. "Well.. the cinnamon makes it warm. Taste wise.. It makes it.." You took a sip and thought for a minute. "Richer, I guess? It's hard to explain," You muttered, then looked back at him. You tore your eyes back down when you saw he was looking right at you, totally hooked onto your words. "I hear nutmeg goes good in it, too.. but I've only tried nutmeg and chocolate together in baked goods," You shrugged. "You did really good with this, you know... not too much cinnamon.. not spicy, at least." You smiled. He nodded, before turning back to the movie.
"Woody, I hear people describe cinnamon like that," He leaned back into the couch, a dull pop came from his back.
"Woody," You repeated, then took a large sip of the hot cocoa. You put the mug down onto the table, and leaned into your boyfriend as the warmth crept and settled into your bones. You weren't even paying attention to the movie, your mind was now occupied with how tired you were. Your eyes slipped up to the clock on the wall, It was nearly one in the morning. Had it only been an hour since Jack walked himself into the kitchen?
You lean deeper into Jack, not caring about his body's natural chill. His clothing still smelled a little like the cocoa from earlier.. "Gotta invest in some cologne, you smell nice like this," You mumbled into his arm. "The cinnamon?" He asked, not looking down at you. "No.. the cocoa, I mean cinnamon would be a nice touch... but you don't seem like a sweet smelling guy, do you?" You muttered. "Are you already getting tired?" Jack asked, and he leaned over you to grab the remote, pausing the movie. You muttered, the heat of the hot cocoa doing way more than you expected on the tiredness you didn't notice you had. "A little," You shrugged, "But we can still try to finish the movie," You offered, but he shook his head. Of course he would, as much of a hard ass or party pooper he came off as, he was going to make sure you were going to get your rest.
You put your hand in his, the one that had the remote.. you unpaused the movie. He paused it, and you unpaused it again. It kind of kept up like this before Jack conceited and kept it playing, although he did lower the volume.. The subtitles were already on, though. "I win," You smirked up at him, before crawling into his lap. You placed your head on his chest, pausing when you felt him stiffen before relaxing against you. His heart beat for a moment before settling to its barely there rhythm. For a minute you thought about asking about his heart, as far as you knew he explained himself like he was becoming a walking corpse... how does that work?
You decided against it, you already asked about him earlier.. and besides, your mind was already beginning to blank as Jack reached to the side of the couch, and turned the lamp off.. It was dark now. It was still raining, you could more clearly hear the drops outside now that the movie was turned down. Plus, Jack was running his fingers through your hair, lightly massaging your scalp. It wouldn't be long until you finally gave in and fell asleep.
"Are you going to still be here in the morning?" You asked, melting into his chest as he hummed in response. "Plan on it, I still need to clean up the kitchen," He added as he curled your hair around his hand. "It'll still be cold in the morning," He added, "I need to make sure you bundle up before you go out for work," He added. "I'm not that dumb," You muttered and lightly slapped his arm. You swear, if he still had his eyes he would have rolled them.
"How do you see? I know you're not.. a normal person, but," You blurted out, lifting your head. He pushed your face back down, shushing you. "Sleep," He ordered, before loosening his hold on you a bit so you could get comfortable. It wasn't an order but it may as well have been with how your body started to loosen into him within the next few minutes, quickly snuffling out your curiosity and questions.
He'd still be here in the morning, you could pester him then. After all, it's what he signed up for when the two of you started to date one another..
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