#but considering everything they went through in just one year i like my version better

[foxstens]

this is just me but i think andrew and neil miss kevin like a limb after he graduates

[14dayswithyou]

💖 Slight 14DWY + Blog Changes! 💖

(16/12/23)

Leon will now move away from Corland Bay when he’s 10 years old. Originally, I never really put that much thought into it because it won't be explicitly mentioned in the game, but I figured I might as well make it more accurate now ^^;

Teo is now 26 (instead of 27). Again, zero thought went into this aside from wanting a wider range of ages for the cast — but now I want him to be closer to Jae and Violet’s age — especially considering they were all childhood friends and Violet was in the grade below them.

Elanor is now 30 and Kiara is 29. In the 2017 version, Elanor was originally the eldest sister, but it just didn't feel right to change it in the 2020 version. Day 3 will still be lore accurate, but everything on this blog will need to be retconned.

14DWY Purple (unofficial) will now be changing from #A14BF4 to #9D64FD.

Not a change, but adding more clarification: Angel will still attend university (and Jae and Teo will still be their university friend), but whether or not they enrolled will remain ambiguous! Day 1/2 kinda insinuates that they studied something ("Teo attended some of their classes"), but I wanted it to imply that they could've attended orientation and/or took "mock classes" after high school to see what it's like as well. I may change a few lines in the demo (in the future) to reflect that.

Egg

I'd like to (hopefully) try to remind everyone that whenever I write about Angel on this blog, they are gender neutral. Because if my ass had a dollar for every time someone assumed they were female because of the cutesy/pink themes or how "soft" I made the MC, I'd have enough money to fund voice actors, translators, custom soundtrack, and pay the $100 Steam fee /hj

Changed the crackpot theory tag into an actual tag!! About time sdghjdg

(07/01/24)

Also not a change, but to solidify Haruko's appearance + Ren's likeness a bit more... Haruko is supposed to be an anime character with pink/blue hair, blue eyes, and fair skin. He's a modern day "sorcerer" (a reference to JJK, not a literal fantasy wizard lmao) from an anime called "Attack on Giants" (another reference to "Attack on Titan"); and is very kind, ditzy, and empathetic. All Ren has copied is his hairstyle, vibe, and demeanour. Ren isn't outright cosplaying Haruko, and it'd take an avid anime enjoyer to notice that Ren is attempting to mimic Haruko.

I'll make a poll one day, but I might change Ren's left sleeve tattoo to the spoiler-free placeholder I used in this artwork. A lot of people seem to prefer it, but I'll wait until the poll to make any final decisions.

I might also make another poll to see if perhaps a new BGM theme would better suit the demo. Because in my mind, the "summer/beach location" = acoustic guitar (rather than piano) — and for some reason I get lo-fi vibes from 14DWY??

I don't think anyone has picked up on this subtle shift yet, but Ren will mainly use "he/him" over "he/they" now (since Haruko is a he/him enjoyer 👍). [REDACTED], however, will still greatly prefer "they/he", and will continue to use them interchangeably.

21/02/24 — or search through Obsidian. (Future Sai here.... I have no clue what this means???? What??? T_T)

I'm gonna cut down on the Teo and Ren bullying on this blog (and in general). I don't find it fun anymore, and it genuinely upsets me when people put down certain characters to make others look better (i.e. "Ren has no ass which makes Leon superior >:)" Just say you like Leon... I beg T_T). It also makes me doubt whether Ren is genuinely a good character or not, and it's gross seeing y'all tear down people who genuinely enjoy Teo. Be kind.

(11/01/24)

Eventually, I'd like to turn this meme into an event in the 14DWY Discord to help create an actual landlord for Day 3. The current landlord has always been a meme-y placeholder (I thought the idea would be funny), but looking at how the game is currently, I want 14DWY to be more "serious". The current landlord will eventually be turned into an easter egg!!

Whether or not Jae had bottom surgery will now remain ambiguous. Everyone is now free to headcanon whatever they'd like, so long as it's not offensive or too OOC.

From now on, I'll also try my best to remind everyone that Jae is gay and Kiara is lesbian. I tried not to bring it up frequently because I was afraid it'd come across like "being gay" was their only defining personality trait, but I'm tired of people sending in asks that don't apply to these characters ^^;

I might move all of the curiouscat questions to this blog and archive the account. It's becoming too much of a hassle for me to manage 3+ social media accounts sgkshjj

[goldenlikedayl1ght]

fearless - d. wagner

a/n: i know wagner wednesday was yesterday, but fuck it. everyone can leave me alone I AM IN LOVE WITH HIM!!!! notes/warnings: extremely suggestive relationship, no use of y/n, secret relationships, tooth rotting fluff at the end, childhood best friends to lovers, danny being jealous, cursing, like so many allusions to fucking, me writing this late at night, sam, josh and jake being extremely oblivious like just the epitome of "so close! that is a shape! <3" word count: 2.3k summary: daniel has been acting awfully weird lately. luckily, the kiszka brothers are on the case! pairing: danny wagner x gn! reader now playing: fearless (taylor's version) - taylor swift “run your hands through your hair/absentmindedly making me want you/and i don't know how it gets better than this/you take my hand and drag me head first, fearless"

Samuel Kiszka had met you way back in elementary school, back when you were kind of regarded as a freak. You were playing with a ladybug on the playground during recess, and he came over and asked what you were doing. When you explained, he became fascinated with the ladybug and declared you would be its parents. Then, a stray kickball had flew over, crushing your new baby bug. Some kid laughed at Sam when he started to cry, so you decided to punch that little fucker in the face.

You had been best friends ever since.

A year after that, he came to you and introduced you to a different kid he had met in his new class, the one right beside yours. His name was Daniel.

And since then, it’s always been the three of you, against everything.

You became awfully close with the Wagners and with the Kiszkas, going as far as to call them your family. You grew up in sort of a rough environment, but there was always a place for you on Daniel’s couch or Sammy’s floor.

You smoked your first blunt together, took your first shots together, and cried over breakups that didn’t even matter anymore.

You were a tech kid in high school with a certain knack for equipment and stage managing. Sam and Danny were just starting to get more serious about their music, so there was a time when you didn’t see each other that much. You were busy with whatever production your high school was putting on, and they had formed a band with Sam’s older brothers, Jake and Josh.

You knew it had been Jake’s dream for years, so besides their mother, you consider yourself the first Greta Van Fleet fan.

When their song, Highway Tune, went viral, you just knew it meant huge things for them. You could see it in Jake’s face, hear it in Josh’s voice. This was something bigger than any of you. So, you weren’t really shocked when they came to you and told you that they had a record deal and a few shows booked around the country.

You were only sad that you’d be stuck in Michigan while your best friends toured around the country, maybe even the world.

Then, Sammy told you a stipulation of their contract was that you would get to be on the set team, and with enough experience, you’d lead that team in all the equipment and stage management you could get your hands on.

And you jumped in with them, headfirst, fearless.

That was years ago, and you haven’t looked back since.

But then Sam started to notice something.

Daniel Wagner had been distracted. Never a good thing to be while on tour.

So, he came to you with the problem.

“I’m telling you, there is something up with Daniel!” He practically whined as you packed your bag to go to the next venue.

“Sammy, nothing is up with Daniel. There’s no way.”

“He doesn’t eat, he is always staring off into the distance, he’s always scribbling in his little notebook, he’s acting weird!”

“You guys are on tour, that’s stressful. Maybe he’s just like, at max stress.” You argue, checking that you have your lights and pyro cues for the next stop of the tour.

“Why aren’t you worried about this? You should be worried, he’s your best friend too!”

You stop what you’re doing and turn to face him.

“Maybe he’s fallen madly in love with someone.”

Sam actually laughs out loud at the thought.

“Good one!” He says with a goofy grin on his face. “We would know if he was in love, don’t you think?” He asks.

“Then I just don’t know, Sammy. Go argue with Jake and Josh about this, I have to go meet with the crew about the inventory for the road.” You say, and Sam just drops it to go do exactly that.

His brothers are on the tour bus when he gets there and luckily, Danny is running late. And he is sure to mention that.

“Seems like Daniel is late again... He’s been doing that a lot, huh?” He says, trying not to act too suspiciously.

Josh and Jake share this look, like they’re trying to figure out if Sam has a point or not. But Jake starts to really think about it, and you know what? Shockingly, their younger brother does in fact have a point.

“Now that you mention it, He is acting kind of weird.” He says softly, and Josh nods.

“I had to ask him for my earrings back the other day and when I got to his room, he looked like I caught him doing something he wasn’t supposed to. I thought he was in the middle of jerking off but now that I think about it, he’s been like that a lot. Always acting like a deer in the headlights.”

So, the whole situation perplexes them, but before they can say anything else on the matter, Danny strolls onto the tour bus.

“Good morning, boys! How are we today?” Now that they had all discussed it, any behavior from him would be suspicious.

“Fine. Why are you late, Dan?” Danny was immediately alarmed by this, since Sam never called him Dan. It was always Danny or Daniel.

“Uh, I just lost my shoes in the room, and they were under my bed. Sorry, I didn’t realize I was keeping you guys waiting.”

Josh, the only one able to play anything cool, just nods, “It’s alright, we weren’t waiting for long. We should probably discuss the setlist for tonight.” Jake hums but he can’t help but notice that Danny has these large black stud earrings in. And he’s sure he’s seen them before, but he can’t quite put his finger on were.

For now, he lets it go. But he keeps it in the back of his mind for later.

They stop at a rest stop that afternoon, along with most of the tech crew who travel in their own bus. You go to check in on your boys and buy Sam a snack as a peace offering for not believing him this morning.

But instead, you run into Josh, who decides to find the others with you. You get to talking but you feel him staring at your face, and you blush.

“What, do I have something on my face?” You ask bashfully.

“No,” he hums softly, tilting his head. “You just— Where’d you get that necklace?” He swears he’s seen it before but can’t put his finger on it.

Your hand goes up to fiddle with the necklace, almost nervously.

“It’s a gift from my sister, I wore it when we graduated, remember?” Josh does not remember.

For now, he lets it go. But he keeps it in the back of his mind for later.

“Oh, yeah. Sorry, Toots, Guess I forgot.” He links arms with you, “Let’s go find the guys, huh?” He smiles. Happy to drop the subject, you go with him willingly.

Sammy, Danny, and Jake are getting their snacks when something catches Danny’s eye, and he won’t stop staring, so Sam looks to see what he could be so bothered by. And all he sees is his older brother, linking arms with you.

He smacks Danny’s arm, whose head snaps to look at him.

“Just Josh, Dude. At Ease, Soldier.” He teases. But he can’t shake this feeling that Danny was bothered by it. But why would he be?

Nothing else weird happens throughout the day, and the show that night goes well. So well, in fact that they invite you to a local bar where they can grab a few drinks and decompress from the day. And that goes really well too, except when Sam sees you the next morning and hickeys cover your neck.

“Dude! What the fuck!?” He asks, investigating your neck further. You blush and shove him off gently.

“Relax, Sammy, I just—I hooked up with someone last night that I met at the bar, and they were kind of rough. No big deal, I’ll never see them again.” You say, with a casual shrug.

Something is off about your tone. But he says nothing.

For now, he lets it go. But he keeps it in the back of his mind for later.

And then, he notices these earrings you have in.

Large black diamond studs.

“Nice Earrings.” He comments casually. He swears he’s seen them before, but like, recently! It perplexes him a bit and it must show on his face, because you are quick to clear up any confusion.

“Oh, thanks! I wore them last night for the bar and I just forgot to take them out. They aren’t too casual, so I don’t wear them too often.”

And it makes enough sense. Why would you lie to him about something as stupid as that?

Then, when he sees Danny that night, he’s covered in hickeys.

And Sam thinks he might still be drunk or high, or both. Because what the fuck is going on?! You both were acting strange, and he’s noticing these little things, so he decides to confide in Josh and Jake again, who relay their findings, and they decide they must confront Danny together.

Danny is not too shocked when he goes to get undressed and get his makeup removed only to find the boys waiting for him there. It took him a while to get back to the dressing room.

“Oh, hey guys! Sorry, I didn’t realize you were waiting for me. I got caught up talking to one of the security guards and then I got lost, this venue is so damn confusing.” And then Sam knows he’s lying because if HE could figure out how to return to the dressing room, then Danny, who has an amazing sense of direction, definitely could!

“What’s going on with you, Man?” he asks as he begins to wipe the makeup off his face.

“What? Nothing is going on with me, dude, I told you I just got lost.”

“Bullshit,” Josh calls. “You’re distracted, always late, and have suspiciously good jewelry taste as of late!”

“Yeah! And it’s affecting other people too,” Jake recalls, “Even the tech crew has noticed it! Our stage manager, our best friend, is acting weird too, and I have a feeling it’s because of your shady actions!”

And that’s when it hits Sam.

The earrings.

The hickeys.

The necklace.

The lateness.

The god damn hickeys.

“Just be real with us, Danny—” Josh starts, before Sam stands up.

“MOTHERFUCKER!” He gasps.

And that stops everyone in their tracks. He says your name to Danny, and it immediately catches his attention.

“What about them?” He asks.

“Are you sleeping with them?” Sam asks.

“What?! Sammy, c’mon—”

“Daniel Wagner, are you fucking our stage manager?!”

There’s a pause.

“Sammy. You’re acting—”

“Answer the question.”

“No!” He sighs. “I think they are lovely, and I would love to, and I want to take them on dates and woo them, but I am not fucking our stage manager, Sam. You guys are being paranoid. And if you don’t mind I’d prefer they don’t know about the fact that I like them, okay?”

All the other boys nod. Of course, It makes perfect sense! You and Danny both like each other but you aren’t able to tell each other that because of your long-standing friendship, but you’re sharing jewelry as a way of subtly telling each other. And that explains why he was staring at you and Josh the other day! And the hickeys were from other people because you couldn’t have each other! Duh! Maybe he really did get lost going back to the dressing room.

The conversation quickly shifts and moves on from Danny’s confession, and everything is normal. They could help you realize that the feelings were reciprocated.

When Danny eventually makes it out of there, he makes his way back to his hotel room. But on his way up, he quickly checks to see if any of the boys are following him, before making a stop on the way.

The knock on your door doesn’t startle you, in fact, you were kind of ready for it. You had gotten back a little while ago and turned on the shower to let it heat up. When you answer it, you grin up at him and grab his arm, pulling him inside. He shuts the door behind himself, before his arms are around your waist, leaning in for a long kiss.

It’s full of this gentleness that he grants you because, well, he always greets you with one sweet, truly loving kiss.

When he pulls away, he grins back at you.

“Hi, sweets.” He hums.

“Hey, handsome.” You respond, “Did you put the boys to bed like I asked?” He laughs at your phrasing, leaning down to kiss your jaw. And then your neck. Again. And again. And one more time for good measure.

“Mhm. They asked me if we were together though.” He keeps kissing your neck.

“I figured as much; they’ve been acting weird.”

“They might think I have a crush on you, now.” He says between kisses.

“And what would give them that idea?” You ask.

“…The fact that I told them I had a crush on you.”

“Well, do you?”

“Mm... I dunno. Might have to kiss you a few more times before I decide for certain.” You grin.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah... Maybe a little more than kissing too...”

“Well, don’t let me stand in the way of your methods, Danny.”

He grins, and kisses you again, this time, deeper, with none of the gentleness of the initial kiss. But there’s a new feeling you get from him now. Hunger.

And you kiss back, as if you have something deeper than hunger. Starvation, maybe.

And you don’t think either of you will ever be satiated.

By the end of the night, he decides he most definitely has a crush on you.

[stromuprisahat]

Hey,

Could you do a meta on the similarities between Labyrinth (1986) and the Shadow and Bone Trilogy? I read through that one scene (Alina and Darkling Interactions on your blog) between Alina and the Darkling after her and Mal get captured and Alina has to bargain for his life and they speak about fairness and the way the public views them both (Chapter 21 of the first book, I believe). I vaguely remembered this type of conversation from another piece of media, and saw in your tags that you attributed it to Labyrinth. Honestly wondering how much the movie influenced the trilogy, as I feel like Alina was supposed to be a Sarah Williams type of character but got her character development strangled by the narrative. Honestly wondering if this makes Mal Toby (romance aside), because Alina fought hard for this man and chose him over the ‘glamorous’ life she could have lived with the guy with powers (Darkling/Jareth). Genya might be Hoggle (works for the bad guy before becoming loyal to the protagonist). Maybe this is all a stretch?

Sorry if this is weirdly formatted. Thank you so much!

No anon! Why?!

I've watched Labyrinth once, and didn't enjoy it, so I was considering passing this on someone else, but since you've delved into details, I just HAD TO rewatch it, because I can't stand not knowing what's going on! So, I'll type as a watch and this will get veeeeeery long.

First of all- I hate those ugly-ass puppets and scenes. I find them creepy, and not in the good way. I totally don't get the ?US? obsession with them, and yes- I've hated Sesame Street, when it got imported here, and I've always hated Czech attempts at copying such production (Táhni, Františku z Fanfárie a Jůheláci taky, když už jsme u toho.).

I feel like Labyrinth is one of those movies, where fanon became widely-accepted canon, because I just can't see plenty of stuff allegedly present.

Alina and Sarah certainly have two things in common- they live in their own version of the world, and they're unbearably immature spoiled brats, even though you'd expect more from them their age considered. Yet somehow, Sarah's so unreasonably whiny, she almost makes me love Alina. Perhaps if we'd age her up a little and gave her potentially world-saving powers, she could've taken the S02show!psycho's place. They seem more alike than the book girl.

I mean... I don't like children, and I wouldn't be such a bitch to a ?one? year old...

The baby was a spoiled child and wanted everything for himself…

The baby can barely stand and certainly doesn't seem able to talk. It doesn't have mental capacity to imagine "everything", sure as hell not want it.

…and the young girl was practically a slave.

Sorry, but a scene earlier I saw her room. I watch her father respect her privacy. Her evil step mother being nothing but polite and non-threatening. I come from a loving family, and I've been keeping eye on my eight-years-younger brother since he was born. To an extent- yes, but they just want her to make sure he doesn't burn down the house on accident or something. He's even fed for fuck's sake! That's hardly slavery. And no, she doesn't get a pass as a moody teenager. This is a spoiled brat behaviour.

Sarah's straight up lying to make herself the victim. That's very Alina. Or more precisely- it's very Alina's new mommy Ol' Bags, but then again it's been said before Alina would grow into Baghra in time.

Goblin King, Goblin King, wherever you may be… …take this child of mine far away from me!

We have a better Czech ballad about children-stealing demon punishing short-tempered mother:

"Pojď si proň, ty Polednice, pojď, vem si ho, zlostníka!“ – A hle, tu kdos u světnice dvéře zlehka odmyká.

Kytice- Polednice (Karel Jaromír Erben)

“Come and get him, noon witch, come take him! I can bear no more!” And look, someone’s outside – a thumb is stealthily working the lock at the door.

A Bouquet: of Czech Folktales (transl. by Marcela Malek Sulak)

I went through it quickly, and the translation doesn't look bad, so it's available on libgen if you're interested.

Alina had her immortality and complementary powers, but what does Jareth see in Sarah is beyond me.

Sarah says she wants her brother back, but honestly- it sounds more like she doesn't want to get in trouble because of him. I don't know if it's only the acting, or if it's intentionally portrayed so, but she doesn't look like someone, who just realized they care about someone else.

It might be the whiny undertone in her voice. Irritating, if anything.

Yeah, a pissing puppet is exactly what I needed to see...

Genya is certainly prettier than Hoggle.

And doesn't piss in public.

The walls of the Labyrinth look like Terezín before reconstruction.

Sarah gets an advice and doesn't bother to delve into it. Another tiny similarity with Alina. Except Alina had her half-a-thought of doubt, and her advisor is a malevolent cunt with her own interests. The freaky worm seemed genuine in its desire to help.

Obligatory song and dancing. *shoot me, please*

The only way out of here is to try one of these doors. One of them leads to the castle at the centre of the labyrinth. And the other one leads to… …certain death.

Please, pick the death one...

"Helping hands"... every creep's wet dream...

Yeah, the evil hot accent isn't enough to make me like this villain. Fucking 80s...

Those depressive warning faces are probably the only thing I might even ~like~.

Okay, NOW he was hot.

Jareth and Sarah have the fairness conversation, when he shortens her time to punish her for her defiance. Aleksander and Alina's take place, when he wants her to face consequences of her own actions and accept responsibility. He's the wronged one there, because she didn't consider anyone or anything, when she chose to trust Baghra and ran off.

Sarah gets Hoggle to follow her by stealing his stuff. She gets the doorknockers to let her in by tricking the mumbling one into taking the unpleasant ring back into his mouth and doesn't even try to pull it out again, or knock without it attached. She's rather cruel in her thoughtlessness, isn't she?

Aleksander never shames Genya for wanting to be Alina's friend. He never blackmails her to help him. She's the one, who provokes his rightful wrath for no good reason.

I think Jareth might be what LB (sometimes) wants us to see in Aleksander. Except it's hardly what she shows by his actions, only what her characters describe.

Another difference- Aleksander doesn't only want Alina, he needs her for his plan to save his people. Jareth merely has the worst possible taste in women.

Okay, the dog making hoof-clopping noises also isn't the worst idea.

I'm kinda sorry Aleksander never tried to poison/drug Alina. That might be fun. Even the collaring couldn't really make her compliant, so he's technically nicer even in this aspect. I can see antis claiming he tried to woo her by showing her the splendor of Little Palace and giving her the centre role in Winter Fete, but the former wasn't different from Grisha in officer training, the later was the Crown's doing. He's even said to despise such events.

Sarah is a modern teenager. Alina's considered adult in her world. I got to the ball scene, where it's painfully obvious Sarah is a child in adult's clothes and make-up. I'm a bit surprised she was played by an actual teenager.

Alina starts off willing to do anything for Malyen, and ends up becoming just what he wants. Sarah starts off selfishly bullying a baby, only to turn 180° as soon as he's stolen, so excuse I'm not persuaded she means it. She doesn't manage it in next hour and half.

~ I have to face him alone. - But why? ~ Because that's the way it's done.

The logic is very Alina, but she never insists on facing the Darkling alone, except that one time she attempts murder/suicide.

Oh no, Aleksander would never wear something this teAsticleless

And no, I truly don't mean the colour.

I ask for so little. Just let me rule you… …and you can have everything that you want. Just fear me, love me, do as I say… …and I will be your slave.

Again, that's no Aleksander at all. He didn't want to rule Alina, he wanted to rule alongside her. He only tried to force her once she endangered his plans for his country and people.

He never promised her everything she's want, because the only thing she seems to want is to be left alone to live in obscurity with no expectations placed on her.

He doesn't want her to fear him and she never does. He doesn't even crave people's fear. He uses it as a tool, when there's no better option.

He doesn't mind Alina defying him, finds it attractive actually, as long as it doesn't ruin- once again- his plans for Ravka and Grisha protection.

The slave line actually reminds me of much better representation of book!Aleksander- I Wanna Be Your Slave by Måneskin.

I was pretty sure I've seen Cinema Therapy episode on Labyrinth I deeply agreed with, but can't find it, so... :(

[gorogues]

it-is-i-zim replied to your ask post: This is just my opinion but Ostrander's revamp of him was the worst thing thing to happen to him character wise. Fans of Boomerang are sometimes straight up harassed for what Ostrander did to his character. Like on one hand, one of the reasons why he was on the suicide squad for so long and we see him AT ALL is because of Ostrander but I'm sick of being called racist because of how my guy was written by Ostrander.

it-is-i-zim replied to your ask post: Identity Crisis was bad for Digger still though. It also made me kinda dislike Tim Drake fans but I also get that for ages their only exposure to Boomer was that comic. And the Knight Terrors: Robin comic bringing that comic back into the established canon did no favors either seeing that it was through the eyes of someone who wasn’t even there. An artistic choice for sure, but it’s also made Tim Drake fans feral about how AWFUL Digger is.

Unfortunately this is more of a fan problem than a writing one. I definitely sympathize with people who love pre-Crisis Digger but hate his post-Crisis self, because modern Digger can be a lot. But people being jerks to other fans because of it is 100% a problem with fandom, and it's got to stop. There's nothing wrong with liking problematic characters as long as you're honest about their flaws, because they aren't real people and they haven't actually hurt anyone real…and just because you like them doesn't mean you approve of everything they do.

It's also fine for people to dislike a character or avoid other fans if they make you uncomfortable for any reason, but it shouldn't get to the point of mistreating a real person over fictional stories and liking/disliking fictional things.

(To make things extremely personal for a moment, it took me over 25 years to figure out why I gravitate to unpopular villains: it was only once I understood that I was the family scapegoat that I realized I like unpopular villains because I'd been considered one/treated like one my entire life. People can have their reasons for liking villains and problematic characters that have nothing to do with the shittiest thing(s) the character(s) have done.)

it-is-i-zim replied to your ask post: And with Owen, arguably his worst characterization was in that one Supergirl comic where he tried to get with a 15 year old Supergirl while being established as an adult man and was like, “I’m not a creep” but then on the same page also called her “jailbait” which uh… Gross. I must say I’m not fond of him because of that and therefore didn’t mind the kinda bad revamp back in Suicide Squad (2016) #47

The question was "the most common way they're written badly", and while that was weird and creepy, it was thankfully just a brief anomaly in the Supergirl book (that's why his strange Rebirth revamp didn't get my pick; it was just one story). I found Owen's intelligence and skill level varied wildly throughout his appearances, and sometimes he was competent and sometimes he was a clueless dumbass. He seemed reasonably smart in his debut story, so IMO him being an idiot was the primary example of being written badly.

it-is-i-zim replied to your ask post: Sorry that my thoughts are kinda all over the place on the Captain Boomerangs.

That's completely okay, it's why we're all here! :)

parkakingrolo replied to your ask post: I'm gonna go a little against the grain on Lisa, and say some of her other characterizations I'm not too fond of are when she's now the moral compass, and I agree The Rogues should have a stronger one, but forcing it on Lisa feels awkward. Don't get me started on when she hinted at feelings for Barry too. Maybe it's just two extremes and they struggle for a healthy middle.

Yeah, that's fair. That one's a problem too, though the one I mentioned bothers me more so I guess that's why I went with it. Truthfully I think both versions are manifestations of sexist beliefs about women, one benevolent ("women are morally better than men") and one misogynist ("women are crazy bitches, especially ex-girlfriends" -- and on that note, I really hate what was done to Magenta by Waid and Johns. She should have been included on the previous list).

It would be good if DC strove for some middle ground between the two, because Lisa should be flawed but not constantly jonesing to slash people's faces.

[itty-bitty-sunshine]

Okay so the song in question is this one which is the Brazilian version of a tinkerbell song and if translated back to it'd go like this

"So alone i see you

In this world, who will understand?

Your light will shine

Your love, i see it in your eyes

No one will dim that

I know that in my heart

Our love wasn't just illusion

And it won't ever die

It's so weird to see you

'Falling asleep' "

Now, that could be interpreted in many different povs, but the one that sticks out to me the most is the dca pov on the Immortal au

Warning for sensitive topics down below like depression and pretty bad mental health

If it makes no sense I'm blaming it on the 2am on the clock and the fact my brain is mush

Through the posts I make on the au you can see me commenting sometimes about how befriending the dca (or a robot overall) is Perkeo's "last shot" at pretty much everything

Now what does that mean, you may ask?

Exactly what it sounds like

You may guess their mental health is pretty fucked up just by the way they let themselves repeatedly deal with virus Moon, either getting hurt or killed when they are too tired to put in the effort to avoid him — all that so they can reach their end goal eventually to get to bring a friend home

Seems an awfully lot for simply keeping one friendship, doesn't it? Specifically considering everything else they already do. Staying over when there's no point to, getting the higher ups to give them better stuff, molding the world to how the two want it to be

That's because they really want it to work out, because that will be the last time they will put effort on someone ever again

They love and love and love and love and get tired of it. They love loving but can't deal with not having where to put down that leftover love anymore.

If it doesn't work out with Sun and Moon they will just get a quiet, isolated place to go to sleep

Because they can't die

Well, not like they would ever tell Sun and Moon about the reason they went looking for them on the first place

But it brings me back to the song, the last part

It's so weird to see you fall asleep.

It's weird for them when you sleep longer than you should. You could be knocked out cold for an entire week if they let you. Maybe even more. You say you're just built different like that.

They get worried when you exhaust yourself so much it's hard to get you to get out of bed. But it's also weird to see you in bed at all because for all the years they've known you you've always avoided resting like the plague.

It'd be weird for them if they ever decided to leave, and even weirder for them if they were to come back after a while. Because you, who is fated to always be there, is not. You're asleep. There's a letter saying to let you be.

It's so weird to see you fall asleep.

The never ending love they always saw in your eyes dimmed by no one other than yourself.

Good thing they don't plan on leaving you, either. That would be just too boring, wouldn't it?

[laismoura-art]

How do you think Kenshi and Suchin met in this new timeline? Especially if you consider that Suchin was the reason for Kenshi’s redemption?

Hey, Bloos! Thanks for the ask!💕

I'll let you know that I have plenty of ideas for Suchin, both for the New Era, as well as for my Scorpion!Harumi AU (you let me know if you're interested in that one too 👀)

I had the chance to brainstorm a bit about her recently with ma gal @thedragonholder and also with @rasta-bot (both make amazing Suchin content💕), and that really helped me to organise my thoughts and ideas for her!

So, to answer your question, you gotta know my version of Suchin better, so please, let me walk you through this more polished version of her origins (now with more Kenshi🤭)

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ORIGINS:

Suchin's family descends from Seido, the Golden Kingdom, in Outworld.

Form an outsiders perspective, the place may feel like a true utopia, everything and everyone has their role and order reigns above. Unfortunately, to assure "order" the rules of Seido ended up being SEVERELY punitive, unfair, and often targeted the less fortunate classes.

Tired of such unfairness, the Bunnag family decided to flee and take as many families as they could (which, sadly, were not as many families as they wished).

For their decision, the Bunnags were cast as traidors and criminals and were hunted down by the city's rulers and their police forces.

The family could've gone after Queen Sindel and requested refuge in Sun Do (which she would've granted, mind you), but they were afraid Seido would see her actions as an act of war and start a bigger conflict.

So, instead, they went after Delia's help.

The Goddess of the Eternal Flame granted all the families a safe trip to Earthrealm. And to praise the Bunnags for their courage, she crafted a pair of blades and blessed them in her flames.

THAILAND VIGILANTES:

Once safe in Earthrealm, the Bunnags had decided they would never again turn a blind eye to the injustices surrounding them. Thailand was now their home, and they would make it a safer and just place!

That resulted in them becoming something akin to vigilantes. Urban legends even. No one really knew their identities, but the locals were certain every generation had their very own vigilante, and soon, Suchin would become her generation's!

But before she could take over the tittle that currently belonged to her mother, Suchin wanted to learn more about her family's mysterious heritage (her parents and grandparents were far too vague about that, and she strongly believed knowing her roots would make her a better warrior, a better protector for Thailand!

So she made sure to gather the attention of the Umgadi and grant herself a place among them. She would be trained and in the meantime, learn about her roots and about that mysterious hooded figure her family seems to worship...

Said and done! Suchin was recruited by the Umgadi and trained for years with a selected group (Tanya, Jade and Harumi). Her instructor, Li Mei, made sure to tell her everything she knew about Delia and Seido (she didn't know the specifics of what happened between the Bunnags and Seido, but she could guess, and did advise Suchin to remain within Sun Do, where she would be welcomed and more importantly, protected)

YIELDING THE BLESSED BLADES:

After her training years were over, Suchin returned to Earthrealm and took over her mother's place so the later could finally retire.

Suchin became an outstanding vigilante. And her notable job started to call attention of some evil forces outside Thailand.

The Black Dragon, the Red Dragon and the Yakusa, all wanted a piece of her!

Her fight with this groups led her to travel all over the globe, and eventually, get to Japan, where the Yakusa already had a price for her head, and to handle such talented swordswoman, the evil organisations sent their most talented swordsman: Kenshi Takahashi!

THE REDEMPTION:

By the time Kenshi was assigned to the task of killing Suchin, he was already starting to question his place within the Yakusa.

He wasn't loud about it. In reality, no one could really even tell he was having any sort of second thoughts.

That is... until Suchin.

She could tell by his fighting alone. He was a skilled fighter, that was not doubt about that. But his head was just not there!

Which was why Suchin decided to spare his life once she had defeated him, "Face me again." She challenged him, "Once you had decided who's your real opponent."

He was sent again, and again he hesitated. Then again and again. Each time less motivated. Each time more confused and torn up.

Suchin was growing impatient. "If you're not going to give me a real fight, at least offer me dinner or something. Fighting you exhausts me!"

He vanished instead.

Only a week later, he reappeared and offered to pay her coffee and pancakes with syrup.

"Coffee and pancakes? Ha! Who would've thought the Yakusa would be such cheapskates!" She teased, but accepted the invitation anyways (a good choice, as the pancakes were phenomenal!)

Good pancakes made up for the long hours of Kenshi just venting about his problems.

One thing he said truly resonated with her, "I feel like I'm not on the right place. I feel like I'm betraying myself, betraying... my very blood! Does that make sense??"

And yes! It did make sense! That's exactly how her family felt in Seido. That feeling of unease and self-betrayal, of self-loathing was precisely what led them to flee their hometown and start all over, reconnecting with who they truly were, away from any external oppresive influences.

So to help Kenshi, she shared with him the story of her family (something she had only done with her teacher and her close Umgadi friends).

She advised him to find his roots, so he would find himself in the process and fully understand who he wanted to be from that moment on.

"You're right." He said in a rather monotone way, but Suchin could tell he was having an epiphany inside his head. Which was confirmed by his sudden movements, he got up at once, kissed her cheek and left with only a rushed announcement: "I must go to Hollywood! Right at this moment!"

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Sorry I took your ask as an opportunity to brainstorm a bit more about Suchin, I hope you had enjoyed my headcanons still (including the one you actually came here for, lol)❤️❤️

@mikka-minns

[dennydraws]

I can't believe @sunnyluma bullied me into posting this... Disclaimer: I write fanfiction once in 10 years, English isn't my native language. I got plot bunnies during the affinity event in FEH

Day of Devotion Words: 1877 Characters: F/Robin (FEAwakening) x Julius (FE4)

The Day of Devotion. A lovely holiday in Askr, a day to bring flowers and express love - all kinds of love. Love towards friends, family … and more. Robin smiled as she placed the flowers through her hair. A smile that would slowly wilt with every next bloom that found it's place on her garments. Her family - the shepherds, they were not here. Not in the same ones in any case. Chrom who once was the closest to her heart was now spending the holiday with another Robin. Not that this Chrom was the same Chrom she knew. Just how many versions of herself were there? It would've been a lie if she said she didn't feel cheated that she was plucked form a timeline she had found happiness and salvation from Grima… or was on the verge of it in any case. And now she was here, in the middle of other conflicts. Happiness was so close and then taken away.

But feelings, especially personal ones such as those had no room on the battlefield and she as a tactician knew that better than anyone. So, her smile adorned her lips once more. She still had plenty to be thankful for - Askr was welcoming place and she had the unique opportunity to meet so many heroes from across time and space - even …more versions of herself! She saw some Robins with worse fate - reminding her of what could've been had she not met Chrom. And there were some Robins who seemed to have tied the knot …with some questionable individuals from the army. She still couldn't wrap her mind over how could any versions of herself would get married to Gangrel of all people and yet the utter devotion she could see in their eyes spoke volumes of how strong that bond was. The smile began to wilt again.

"Oh, get a grip Robin… that's not like you at all." She closed her eyes and shook off any sign of bitterness that could even try to emerge. After all, she knew full well what Grima would feed upon if she even slightly allows it. Instead Robin picked the buoquet of flowers and went out to find someone out there who got no flowers today - surely there ought to be a lone soul somewhere in Askr that could use a little happiness today. As Robin strolled the paved streets, slowly but surely she reminded herself - it was for a tactical benefit. Happier heroes make for stronger units. At the end of the day their survival was the main goal. And that's exactly what she thought when her eyes stopped upon Julius. Alone as usual, he was leaning on a tree in the shades and away from everyone and everything. Robin was aware of his circumstances, in fact she considered him almost like a distant reflection of herself. She knew how a dragon's hold on the mind could feel even when everyone in the army was sure there was nothing left of the real Julius there. Purely for tactical purposes, she reminded herself once more. "Happy day of devotion." Robin beamed a polite smile, holding forth the flowers.

There was a moment of complete confusion on Julius' face. Julia had attempted to sneak a bouquet earlier today which he had instantly crushed despite the screams from his inner mortal puppet. He didn't expect more or any other interactions today, in fact he was hoping he'd be left alone today and this brief moment of confusion loosened the grip he had. "Why?" Julius uttered in an usual calmer voice. Robin immediately caught it. So he was still in there, she thought. Talking to her own fallen self was completely useless when she had tried before but this change of tone made her consider - there might still be something of Julius left in him. "Why not? You've been helping the army fight off whatever evil is looming over us. Isn't that a good reason to thank you for your efforts?" Robin answered pulling her best tactician voice. After all, it was simply stating the facts.

"Hah! You think I do that out of devotion? I long to crush you like the little insects you are. The contract simply binds me to crush only specific ones. But when this contract is broken you will make no difference to me!" Julius leaned in, his hand over the flowers clutched into a tight grip before Robin could even let go. "Yes well… I'm glad you are accepting the flowers though my hand doesn't come with them." Robin noted completely ignoring the dragon's taunts. Another moment caught off guard. "Ah…" A sudden obedient withdraw followed. There he was again, Robin thought and a smirk formed her lips. So that's how you had to go with it. The more you registered Loptous the more he emerged. She just had to see Julius instead. Her eyes squinted. But that was an issue wasn't it? No one knew Julius… except when he was a child and even then, that was so long ago. Whoever was inside had all grown up now. "You seek something that is no longer there." the dragon smirked, taking the flowers, nails gripping into them. Oh he only had to tear them now in front of her to make his point and yet, this hand was flinching in disobedience.

"Hmm, yeah been there, done that." Robin waved her hand after which she completely ignored the looming figure and sat under the tree next to him. This dress certainly made it a bit harder. As much as she enjoyed the flowers, at the back of her head she only wished she was in her comfortable long robes and poofy pants. "They only see the monster, the big disappointment that you are no longer you. It really chips away from your confidence, doesn't it? We're not that different - you and I." Julius remained frozen and still. The dragon was silenced in sheer anger. How dared this mortal overlook him!?

"I was just… lucky. I had someone to pull me before that grip got too strong to bear. But there were times I wasn't as lucky." Robin wasn't looking at him, her smile turned somber, "But you are still holding on. It means you are devoted to something - a hope, an idea, maybe someone… That's worth celebrating today, don't you think?" The pain coming through Julius' head was immense but he made no noise. He couldn't let Loptous groan or grunt like every other time he even tried to produce a thought of his own. His hand was holding on to these flowers - a devotion to hope he never dared speak and he was ready to break his own hand before he lets him crush them. The silence hung in the air. Robin didn't move or look up. A heavy feeling began to swell into her throat - is this how Emmeryn felt? Memories of her speech before she lept into her death after no reaction came from the armies started to surface. The painful realization that the ideals you hold on to are not strong enough to change the inevitable tragedy ahead. A mental kick followed - when did she get so foolish as to let emotions dictate her so? She was a tactician. Emmeryn pure and kind expected the best in people and the world needed people like her but Robin? She had to ground herself. This conversation was nothing but tactical approach to boost morale, nothing more.

Something gently snuck behind her ear. A flower form the bouquet. "I used to.. place flowers in her hair." Julius muttered, slow and uncertain. He had leaned over, his look distant yet searching. Robin turned immediately with her eyes widened. This was most certainly not Loptous. Her mind raced. What did he mean? Oh, he probably meant Ishtar. Of course he did. A little bitter reminder. She mentally bit her tongue - now was not the time for this. The point was - he was still there, in fact he emerged. Was it a good moment to run and call for her? No, that would mean leaving him alone and this moment felt too crucial. Like a battlefield on it's own, it was all about timing, catching the flow and turning it to your favor. "The…best I could do... was to let them go. If they hated me…they would not come near, they would not …be hurt by him. If they... knew I was still here…they would hesitate and he would kill them. They…are safe now… without me." Julius continued speaking with his look turning more and more empty with each word.

Robin recognized where this was going. His thoughts would spiral in despair and Loptous would emerge again, maybe this time for good. She had to think fast, what to reply before he'd slip again. She had to help him win this battle. "Your strength is admirable and I say that as a tactician." Robin replied with a forced brighter tone, pushing any and all emotions that could possibly create a tremble. She had to focus on… Julius. Not on Loptous. Not on the weaved tragedy that had stained every step of his life but on the hero who no one would see or even believe was still in there. Julius' eyes gained a brief focus even if no words came out, Robin knew he was looking at her… maybe a bit too strongly. It was strange, she had seen Julius many times, but never… The Julius, nor his look ever felt on her, not like this. She gave herself another mental kick. Now she began to see how some version of her out there married Gangrel - he too probably did this helpless lost look on her and tugged her heart strings. Probably even gave her flowers. Apparently that was a weak spot she had not realized. Although the image of Gangrel holding a bouquet of flowers was absurd and yet suddenly things began to make a bit more sense regarding her romantic choices in some alternative realities.

"I mean it. I'm proud of you, Julius!" Robin added further as small attempt to break the silence once more and shake any potential emotions trying to find their way into her heart. Instead of a reply Julius simply slumped on his knees, much like a tired puppet with loosen strings and planted his forehead on her shoulder. Robin turned stiff as a statue. That certainly wasn't an expected turn of events. Carefully she moved her arms to give him a careful pat which gradually became a hug. Goodness, this… escalated quickly, she thought. Julius couldn't utter more words. Rather he basked in the sensation of his own body for as brief as this was going to last. He wanted to enjoy the moment - he wasn't sure if he'd ever get another. But the smell of flowers in her dress, her hair, the gentle hold on him - yes he… he would get another. He would fight to get another moment such as this.

Autor Note: Do not blame me for this idea, blame this!

I can't believe I wrote a fanfic in 2024 about Fire Emblem...

[mysteryhackin]

After some delay, here is my entry for Week 3 of @forduary , Portal Years! Warning: Discussion of a major character death (very unlike me).

After traveling the multiverse for thirty years on a quest to destroy Bill Cipher, Ford ends up in a parallel dimension where he never went through the portal and built the International Institute of Oddology. But as a parallel Fiddleford McGucket shows him around, a nagging question is going through Ford's mind- what went differently to make all this happen? And was it worth it?

The door to the jail cell creaked open, and Ford jumped up from his hard chair behind the steel table, ready to fight his way out.  He unfortunately didn’t have enough time to figure out the handcuffs, even though he had been imprisoned for what must have been a few hours, but a few well placed moves would allow him to take the key from one of the guards-

But instead of a guard, Fiddleford McGucket walked into the room.

Well, a parallel version of Fiddleford McGucket.

The first time Ford had seen this parallel version of his former colleague, it was from a distance, and he hadn’t gotten a good look because the man had instantly run away, quickly calling for security.  Ford still didn’t know what had caused the panicked reaction, but he was determined not to let it happen again.  Sure, he probably could fight his way out of the place, but why bother if he could talk his way out?

He quickly sat back down, putting his hands flat on the table, and tried to look as non-threatening as possible.

“Stanford?” Fiddleford asked tentatively.  His hair had turned grey with age- so much so that it was almost white, and he had the wrinkles to match, but there was no mistaking that nose.  All things considered, the man had aged well.  Ford suddenly was struck with the force of how much time had really passed since he was pushed into the portal.  He had calculated it had been about thirty years, but it was one thing to watch yourself gradually age in a mirror, and quite another to see a friend suddenly appear to be… old.  But he took a deep breath, using the mind clearing techniques that had helped him many times in his adventures, and focused on the here and now.

Ford tried to smile.  “Hello, old friend,” he said, but even to himself he sounded weary.

Fiddleford nodded in a distracted way, as if trying to decide something.  Then he nodded to the security guard standing behind him, and the guard shut the door, leaving the two of them alone.

“I’ll have you know,” he said in that familiar Tennessee drawl.  “That even though I might look like nothin’, I have a bunch of ways to defend myself if you feel like trying somethin’.”

Ford shook his head.  “I just want to get out of here,” he said.

“An’ where will you go?” Fiddleford asked steadily.

“I have business to take care of,” Ford answered in a tone that very solidly implied there would be no details given.  His shock at seeing Fiddleford had worn off, and he remembered to once more be wary and trust no one.  Yes, his time walking around the campus before he was imprisoned was impressive, and this world seemed to be everything he ever wanted… but it was incredibly possible this all came about because his and Fiddleford’s counterparts in this world had embraced Bill and been paid handsomely in return.

Fiddleford once more stared at him, thinking.  “All right, suit yourself.” He said after a moment.  Then he took a deep breath.  “Want a tour before you go?”

Ford’s eyebrows shot up in surprise.  “Ah… yes!  Yes please!” his mind began racing with all of the things this could mean- was he being taken to be killed? Could he escape once he was out of the cell? Was Fiddleford really working for Bill, and this was a chess move meant to take him off guard?  Was he going to meet his own counterpart in this dimension?

But all of the thoughts were outweighed at the thought of touring this incredible campus- the International Institute of Oddology, as all the signs said- and all of his accomplishments in this… better world. 

There was no way he was going to pass this up.

Fiddleford nodded.  “All right then.  Follow me,” he said, then knocked on the door to the cell.  It swung open, and he walked out, Ford following.

“Sorry about the jail time,” Fiddleford said as they breezed past the guards.  “But your presence here is a threat to the entire dimension.”

“What?” Ford asked, a little more sharply than intended, then took a deep breath and tried to be softer.  “Why?”

Fiddleford punched a code into the keypad in a wall near what looked like elevator, and turned back to Ford.  “If a person meets their counterpart from another dimension, not only will it destroy both of them, but also destroy the dimension where the meetin’ took place.  Seen it myself.” 

“You have?” Ford asked, eyes wide.  He had been drifting through the multiverse for decades and he had never heard of that.

Of course, it wasn’t until recently he ended up in parallel universes, either.

“Yeah,” Fiddleford nodded grimly, and told Ford about a tragic expedition that Fiddleford and a crew he led experienced in a parallel universe as they rode the elevator up.

Ford’s mouth was hanging open when the story ended.

Fiddleford chuckled wryly.  “That’s a great way to catch flies, Stanford,” he said, as the elevator door dinged and the doors opened to the outside.

“Wait,” Ford stayed back as Fiddleford walked out of the elevator.  “Why are you letting me walk around?  I could run into my counterpart!”

“Aw c’mon, give me some credit!” Fiddleford said.  “Stanford- this dimension’s Stanford- is far away in an undisclosed location, so he has no chance of running into you.”

Ford breathed a sigh of relief, and exited the elevator.  “So what are the chances I can get rid of these handcuffs?” he asked hopefully.

“Slim to none,” Fiddleford answered breezily.  “You might know where Stanford is hiding, what with you having similar brains an’ all.  You might escape and cause trouble.”

Ford couldn’t help but look indignant.  “I would never- that would kill me too!”

Fiddleford looked sadly at Ford.  “Wouldn’t stop some people.” He said, then his grin returned.  “We all know Stanford Pines is reckless anyway.  So as long as you’re here, those cuffs are staying on, buddy.”

Ford sighed.  “Fair enough.” He muttered.

But the handcuffs were soon forgotten as Fiddleford took him around the International Institute of Oddology.  It was huge. It was bustling. It was dangerous.

It was beautiful.

There was a section for deciphering codes and ancient scripts.  There was a section studying the creatures of the forest (sometimes run by some of the creatures of the forest- he had already run into two gnomes in lab coats).  He walked past conference rooms with a video screen of someone who was somewhere in Japan showing the room her findings of a tiny, upright lizard that fit perfectly in her hand.  A whole wing was devoted to building electronics (he and Fiddleford nearly got electrocuted when something went wrong with a Tesla coil), and a room where it looked like the scientists were trying to reverse engineer time tape.

“How…” Ford started, then swallowed, regaining his composure, and tried again.  “How is this all possible?”

Fiddleford beamed at him.  “It’s a rare day when I get to impress Stanford Pines, let me tell you!” he said.  “It took a long time- The IIO just celebrated its twenty fifth anniversary.”

“Twenty-fifth?” Ford repeated, his voice far away.  “So… I only traveled in the multiverse for five years here.”

Fiddleford gave him a funny look.  “Uh, nope, you were right here buildin’ all this stuff up before we could get the company offa the ground.” He saw Ford’s haunted face.  “Um… how long have you been out here?”

“Thirty years.” Ford whispered.  “Thirty years wasted.”  He felt anger bubbling inside of him, and wasn’t sure how long he could continue to put up a good front.  “My brother pushed me into the portal and sent me out here,” he said through gritted teeth.

Fiddleford’s eyes bugged.  “Pushed you into the portal!  That’s terrible!”

“Yes.” Ford was glad he now had a channel to let out his anger to Fiddleford’s sympathetic ear.  “It was.” And before he was about to release an epic tirade, Fiddleford asked a question in a horrified voice.

“So he was possessed by Bill that early?”

Ford scoffed.  “No, Stanley was never possessed by Bill, he was just being his usual oafish-” Ford stopped as his parallel friend’s words caught up to him.  “What do you mean ‘that early’?”

Fiddleford pursed his lips, then said, “C’mon.  Let’s go inside.”

They walked towards the A-frame cabin that Ford had the Corduroy family build for him when he first came to Gravity Falls.  The last time Ford had seen the outside of his cabin, it was surrounded by barbed wire, empty nuclear waste drums, and who knows what else- he wasn’t in a good frame of mind when he went through the portal.  But this version of the cabin was welcoming and well taken care of, despite being surrounded by the IIO campus.  Fiddleford opened the door and walked in, and after a few moments fighting a pang of homesickness he hadn’t felt in years, Ford followed.

The lab had been converted into a cozy living room, the walls completely covered with full bookshelves.  A stack of books and papers sat on a little side table with a lamp near a comfortable chair, with a couch across the chair and a coffee table between them, also covered with books and papers. The room was slightly disheveled, but the chaos was warm and welcoming instead of the reflection of a tormented mind.  Ford made his way down the two steps to the table and chair, and noticed a framed picture hidden by the books on the side table so only the person in the chair could see it. It was the same photo he had carried with him throughout wars, travels, heists, injuries, recoveries.  The photo of him and his twin brother as kids on the boat they were fixing up.

He swallowed, trying to fight the implications of that photo being displayed in such an intimate, hidden place.  “Fiddleford,” he said softly.  “What happened to Stanley?”

Fiddleford motioned for Ford to sit down in the chair, and he himself sat down on the couch.  “When your brother came to visit you, you gave him your first journal to hide from Bill.  He left, and somehow you were able to stave Bill off long enough to re-jig your mind reader and encrypt your thoughts, which made it so he couldn’t posses you for a while.  You found me, we reconciled, and we started working on the Dimensional Vortex Neutralizer, which allowed us to use the portal without any risk of it connecting it to the Nightmare Realm.”

“And Stanley?” Ford pressed.  “What happened to him?”

“A coupla years after we set up the DVN, he came to visit, asking if he could bring your journal back.  You were of course glad to have it back, glad to see your brother again, and glad to show how you had fixed the problem that had plagued you since you last saw ‘im.  But…” Fiddleford exhaled, puffing his cheeks out.  “It wasn’t your brother.  Somehow Bill got to ‘im, and he had been using your brother just like he had been usin’ you.  Bill tried to break the DVN and start up the portal, but luckily we were able to cotton on to what was going on and stopped him just in the nick of time.  Bill escaped- of course, he only existed in the mind anyway- but your brother… your brother didn’t make it.  Bill messed him up real bad.”

Ford felt like he had been punched in the stomach.  He wouldn’t wish possession by Bill Cipher on anyone- even, no especially on Stanley.  And to have that experience kill him…

Ford’s eyes were suddenly hot, and he looked up at the ceiling for a while, Fiddleford staying blessedly silent. 

A million thoughts went through his head, making him completely numb.  Finally, one broke through- a thought he had never stopped thinking in thirty years.

“I.  Will. Destroy. Bill Cipher.” He said in an intense, quiet voice.

Fiddleford’s leg started shaking excitedly, and Ford recognized the behavior from the Fiddleford in his home dimension- it meant he was especially excited.  But before he could let out a whoop that Ford was so used to, he stood up.  “Well now, ain’t that nice.  Glad to hear you’re on our side.” He said, a hard, determined look in his eye that Ford had never seen on his easy-going friend.  “We’ve been tryin’ to figure out how to get revenge on that piece of cow turd, pardon my French, for decades, and it seems like you’re just the fella to do it.”  He extended an arm.  “This entire institute is at your service, Stanford- courtesy, or course, of Stanford.  And I’ll do whatever I can to help.” He took some keys out of the pocket of his lab coat, and soon Ford’s hands were free. 

“Thank you,” Ford said solemnly, not being able to shake the profound feeling of loss.  “I’ve been building a quantum destabilizer throughout the years, but I still haven’t found an energy…” he started a little distractedly, and once more felt his eyes watering as Stanley crossed his mind.  He sniffed and tried to straighten up.  “Apologies,” he said.  “Do you have a tissue?”

Fiddleford looked at him sadly.  “Hang on, I’ll grab you one,” he said as he got up.

Ford tried to focus on the task at hand.  This was it, this was how he would kill Bill Cipher… but why did everything seem so hollow all of the sudden?  It wasn’t like it was his Stanley who was gone… but maybe his was gone.  Bill certainly knew how to manipulate people, and even though he always thought of his brother as too crooked to be manipulated, every man has his breaking point… and maybe Stanley was closer to it than Ford thought.  He thought of, really though of the way Stan looked when he showed up on Ford’s doorstep… he clearly wasn’t in a good place…

“Here y’go,” Fiddleford interrupted his thoughts and handed him a tissue.  Ford took it, not making eye contact, and turned away to blow his nose.

“By the way,” Fiddleford continued as Ford still had his back turned.  “Stanford wanted me to give you somethin’ else.  It’s real hard to work with grief, and he didn’t want you to have to go through the same thing he did- he does. I told you what happened to Stanley ‘cause we wanted to make sure you weren’t in cahoots with Bill, but there’s no reason for you to have to deal with that knowledge if you don’t have to.” There was a small clicking sound, and Ford turned around to see Fiddleford holding something that had an oddly shaped lightbulb sticking out of it. “Do ya know what this is?” Fiddleford asked calmly.

Ford’s eyes widened.  “The memory gun- why do you still-”

“This ain’t your burden to bear, Stanford.  You got other things to worry about.”  Fiddleford said, and before Ford could react, Fiddleford pulled the trigger and everything went white.

Ford blinked and watched as Fiddleford put something in a drawer.  He had the nagging feeling something was missing.  Something important.  “What was I saying?”

Fiddleford turned to him with a big smile.  “The quantum destabilizer- something about energy?”

“Oh, of course!” Ford said, pushing away the odd feeling in favor of excitement.  “I need an energy source to power it!”

“I think we got just the thing,” Fiddleford said.  “I’ll show you the particles department- ye’re bound to find something there.”

“Fantastic!” Ford said cheerily, full of anticipation and… hope.

It wasn’t until he left a few days later, the fully functional quantum destabilizer on his back, that he realized he had never asked about where Stanley was in this dimension, but it was a passing thought and not something he had time to be concerned about.

After all, it was fitting that this world, where everything turned out- this better world- would be where he would find the final piece he needed in order to destroy Bill Cipher.

Writing a character death is very out of character for *me*, but after spending a week on a story that just wasn't working, this one hit me like a truck and I wrote it in two days. If it makes you feel better, it's not *our* Stan's who was killed. Or if it makes you feel *really* better, let's just say Fidds was lying to test Ford, and that dimension's Stan is hanging out with that dimension's Ford on a beach somewhere.

I always love Athgalla-arts' take on the Better World Dimension, where Stan is a founding member of the IIO and goes on portal expeditions with Fidds and Ford (and has a cheesy yet awesome ponytail).

[doamarierose-honoka]

In 2010, Rayman was dead. After two popular minigame collections with his then-co-stars, the Rabbids, Rayman was usurped from his throne as Ubisoft’s mascot and relegated to cameo appearances in games like Academy of Champions: Soccer. Sam Fisher has suffered a similar fate recently.

Then, a miracle - Ubisoft released Rayman Origins, a gorgeous 2D platformer with excellent movement, incredible music, and enough charm to make you forget all about the limbless wonder getting kicked out of his own series. Not a Rabbid in sight.

Origins was an incredible new beginning for Rayman, but it was only the beginning. Two years later, Ubisoft Montpellier did it again with Rayman Legends. Not content to simply be an improvement on the first game, Legends was one of the best 2D platforming games of all time. It looked like things were only going to get better.

Unfortunately, despite massive critical success, Rayman faded into the background once more, with only a few minor mobile games since then. Now, his long decade of silence is finally over thanks to Ubisoft Milan who, ironically enough, have brought Rayman back in a game that stars the very creatures who originally kicked him out.

“I would say that I started thinking about the DLC as soon as I saw the work on Sparks of Hope going in the right direction,” Sparks of Hope’s creative director Davide Solani tells me. “I loved the idea of closing this fantastic journey of Sparks of Hope with Rayman, as Rabbids were originally introduced in a Rayman game. I felt it was the correct thing to do”.

Rayman in the Phantom Show marks Rayman’s first appearance in a game in some time, which gave Ubisoft Milan the opportunity to redesign the character for his reintroduction, which also marks the first time he’s been in 3D since his Super Smash Bros. Trophy model in 2014.

Solani tells me that extensive work went into designing Rayman’s new look for the game, with the idea being to aim for something “new, current, and fitting for our universe”. Specific effort went into Rayman’s facial expressions and the body and shoes, for which the team challenged themselves to “dare a little” by introducing pockets and a larger hood to give the limbless wonder more comfort and a sense of identity outside of adventuring.

Of course, one of the most important elements of Rayman’s design is his hair which, beyond the whole lack of limbs thing he’s got going on, is one of the key parts of the character’s identity. Rayman’s hair is used both to fly and to look fly, and it’s a core part of this look.

“[It’s] one of the most 'representative' parts of the character,” Solani says. “We wanted to avoid just an indistinct mass, but also not to go overboard with details. We therefore focused on creating this balance between volume and details. A fully animatable tuft that would help to underline the character's charisma and emotions.”

Rayman may have a new design this time around, but Sparks of Hope isn’t above referencing the hero’s past. The Phantom Show is stuffed with nods to Rayman’s history, including reworked versions of his combat fatigues from Hoodlum Havoc, a cutout of Globox and some plum juice from the same game, a cardboard recreation of the first level from the adventure that started it all, and even some shoutouts to the pirates from Rayman 2.

Another Easter Egg Solani points out is Rayman’s weapon in the game, which resembles the plunger gun that he used in Raving Rabbids. You’d think that Rayman would want to avoid memories of that particular encounter considering everything that happened after, but he’s rocking a brand-new one in the Phantom Show.

“I loved the idea of paying a tribute to the plunger, in a way,” Solani tells me. “With my team, we’ve imagined how a new plunger could look like years later, and how this new basic weapon could be transformed through the various costume transformations, and what special ability could result from each. It was a fun process for us.”

It’s not just Rayman himself who returns for the Phantom Show, as the DLC also sees the return of David Gasman, the voice of the limbless wonder for nearly all of the games in the series before Douglas Rand took over the role for Origins, Legends, and the mobile spin-offs.

“Like many players, for me, David Gasman is Rayman’s voice. Also, we did use David as Rabbid Mario in Sparks of Hope, and it was a tremendously fun experience working with him. The idea of having him going crazy to voice both Rayman and Rabbid Mario was too good to miss. “

One of the most interesting things about the DLC is that it’s not just a reunion between Rayman and the player, it’s a reunion between Rayman and the Rabbids as well. The limbless wonder hasn’t been on-screen with them properly since TV Party, with only a small cameo from the screaming nuisances in Rayman Adventures between then and now.

The DLC plays into this time gap, with Rayman holding a grudge against the Rabbids when he first runs into them. Solani says that this was one of the ideas that the team worked with and that they loved seeing Rayman and the Rabbids bickering, but that they start to work together across the expansion, as Rayman quickly gets over his grudges in the name of being a hero.

Rayman in the Phantom Show closes the door on Rayman’s past while being brutally honest about the hero’s long absence. It has fans wondering if the DLC opens another door for his future, one that many want Ubisoft Milan to be involved with.

“We don’t know yet what we’ll do in the future,” Solani says. “But I can assure you that working on Rayman was a true honour for all of us.”

[makedonsgriva]

Erha volume 4 finished.

Thoughts so far:

1. In love with Mo Ran’s character development. He went from being the biggest asshole I was itching to punch to a man who is trying everyday to be better and do better. He went from being a selfish, self absorbed piece of trash to someone who cares so much about others. In some ways, he now reminds me of Damen from Captive Prince and considering how much I love Damen… yeah. I really loved how Mo Ran grew over the course of volume 3 and 4.

2. Chu Wanning is still my favorite, precious most pathetic meow meow. Loved how after waking up after five years and coming back to life the only thing that has been on his mind is dick. He came back sluttier and I’m living for it.

3. Xue Meng just keeps me making fall in love with him over and over. Those dolls?? That was the most adorable thing he could have ever done. Also now that Mo Ran is not blinded by his obsession, Shi Mei is finally growing on me. Like I’m finally seeing a more real and authentic side of him ? I like this version of him way more than what I was seeing through Mo Ran’s rose coloured glasses.

4. I’m super curious about Nangong Si and Ye Wangxi’s past. Is YWX in love with NGS? Is he in love with Song Qiutong? Should they all date each other? Stay tuned to find out.

5. Plot wise, this volume did not have any major arcs and it was mostly very soft and sweet showing great development in the characters and perhaps that is why it has become my favorite. I simply can’t have enough of a reformed Mo Ran treating Chu Wanning with utmost respect and love.

6. I would once more like to highlight this paragraph because I keep reading it over and over and it never fails to make my heart melt and drive me to tears:

“Time marched on. And I, due to remorse, or perhaps something else—

I couldn’t see you, but always I thought what you would do if you were here; what would make you smile, what would make you mad. I thought about you before doing anything, tried to make you proud with everything that I did. I thought, “If you were here, and I did this, would you nod? Would you be willing to praise me a little, say I did okay?”

Day after day I thought about this, until it had permeated my very bones, become second nature. That’s why, as time went on, I never even realized—

That as the days had passed, I’d grown into the you I held in my heart.”

I swear this volume had some of the most romantic lines I’ve ever read. There are so many paragraphs I’ve marked. One more that I can’t stop thinking about is this:

“I, full of sin and returned from the dead, with these blood-covered hands from my past life, lift up this bowl of warm, rich soup in this one. I would kneel in repentance for the rest of my life, I would go willingly to hell thereafter, if only you would deign to share a taste of it with me.”

Like I just love how Mo Ran calls himself a crude and uneducated person all the time and can’t put his feelings into words very eloquently but then he thinks of shit like this and it just gags me and leaves me gasping for air. Beautiful.

[allycat75]

Hey Boston Dumb Fuck 👋! I've been seeing scenes from your lazy-as-fuck exercise in futility, Ghosted, lately and it has triggered a few things.

(A bit of a long one, so buckle up)

I don't know, maybe because the scenes I have seen of Jack in Red One remind me of Cole's cranky twin, or hearing your Nepo director go on about how impressed he is with himself reinventing Santa and how he's going to blow our minds with his genius, but it seems of late rich, mostly white men are just really turned on by their own mediocrity. Just walking around with blue balls because of it and the lack of oxygen to their brains is making them hypoxic. Even sweet Ryan Reynolds got high off his own supply when promoting the recent Deadpool. It was OK, but he and Hugh were making it out like this was the Citizen Cane of R rated Marvel movies (I still think they were throwing you a pity bone by casting you, BDF, and all I see when I look at your part is not Johnny Storm, but the worst version of Christopher Robert Evans, just slightly more horrible than you have been in real life the past few years, if you can call what you are doing living really. Was it a cry for help?).

I can't blame you for Red One. You are just a shitty actor looking for that sweet, sweet paycheck while The Rock and his minions run the show, so let your team set your program to "total bullshit bro douche" in a few weeks so you can get through the press junket without weeping at the fact you murdered Christmas, along with your fanbase that would have blindly seen this festering turd of a movie if you hadn't gaslit them all, making them look and feel stupid and crazy.

But I do blame you, from pillar to post, for Ghosted. You may think that Producer credit was for vanity and a bump in pay, but when push comes to shove, it actually means something. Just ask another Hollywood phony (and someone who was actually invited to the SNL X-mas party last year) Alec Baldwin. On Rust, he may not have been held responsible as the actor who shot the cinematographer dead, but as the producer he sure had the responsibility and accountability for all the things that went wrong, leading up to that preventable tragedy. And I know for you coddled princes, this idea of accountability is a new and scary concept, but woman up and get used to it, you fucking coward.

So, as producer of Ghosted, you should understand that you buy the premise, you buy the bit. How does the movie start- we see a beautiful woman named Sadie (in an ugly ass wig, by the way) at a farmer's market after just discussing with her boss that she is lost after a friend's death. The friend, a workaholic like her, didn't even have food in her house, but had a plant, which is more than Sadie has. Looking pensive and sad, but with a full basket of food she finds he way to the plants only to be confronted by a dickhead who treats her like shit at the worst possible time and tells her she should get a cactus because they are prickly and don't need much attention or care.

So I will stop there, because after this there is something only a male writer, producer and director would think they just saw- those two want to FUCK! Where most women (and to their credit, probably some men) would say, "Boy, if he would just apologize for being a complete and total asshole and make a kind gesture, because anyone with eyes could see she looked really sad, he could make her day better." And that is where it falls apart. Not that it would have really been any better because Cole is selfish in thinking he is everything she needs and doesn't consider maybe she has shit going on in her life that doesn't involve him, but it could have started on a better path if instead of running after her and saying, "Hey, I think we made a connection" (to which most women would have gotten out the pepper spray), he said "Hey, I want to apologize. I was out of line. It is none of my business what type of plant you should get and I should have been more respectful. Can I buy you a coffee to make up for it?". But heaven forbid a man ever apologize and make amends, especially for something they know they did wrong (none of that bullshit you said in the SMA article that came off like just apologize because she is upset and it will shut her up).

Even better would have been to get a few females looking at this script (maybe Scarlet did and that is why she jumped) and even totally flip the script to make it from Sadie's point of view. It would have been much more interesting watching a female special agent who had to target a friend and one of the few female colleagues she had, exploring the aftermath and getting back to her first mission since it happened. And to add insult to injury, also having to deal with this egomaniac one night stand, who hopelessly followed her, convincing him it isn't all about him and that he has no idea what it is like to be her. He has no right to judge. It could even still be funny (or start to be funny, because with the exception of Sebastian Stan, this movie had no Rom and no Com), but there is so much depth that could have been explored that was sacrificed for the male gaze. Instead of being empowering, because Cole was supposed to be the "damsel in distress", Sadie still remained the object that helped moved the story along for the boring, one-dimensional male protagonist.

One could say, "who the fuck cares- this movie (and its leading actor, after a string of current and future failures, both professionally and personally) are completely inconsequential", and I would agree, save for the fact that this is just one example of a larger problem we have seen over and over of men failing upward (I also include almost anything by Coppola and Scorsese- just look at Megalopolis for the former, and the latter only wrote his first decent female character last year). Unless there are consequenses for these kinds of epic failures Hollywood will continue to churn out more and more empty calories, drowning out real voices of all shapes, sizes, genders and colors. We need to call out these flaws instead of excusing them away so we can fix them for a more satisfying, authentic experience for everyone.

Side note...

Also, the last thing I remember about Ghosted was how you got shafted at the premiere and we're forced to give your little stevia (fake sugar) baby a spin on the red carpet, but no one was happy with you in the end- Ana and Dexter looked like they wanted to kill you, and your precious Nazi Succubus sure got her revenge for being shuffled back stage and out the door after only a few pictures without you. Remember, they forced you to fake marry the arrogant, racist, antimemtic, fatshaming, lazy, childish dumb dumb (everything opposite of what you said you wanted, even as recent as that stupid SMA article, but you are now an established pathological liar, so who knows what is true about you anymore).

You even had two kinda fake ceremonies- so, remind me again who you are trying to make seem insane in this narrative? Because it looks less and less like your former fans and more like you and your team with those pathological lies and ridiculous stunts. Even got your nuts so tight in a vice, they humiliatingly got you to make up for that red carpet debacle and sealed your fate as Hollywood's latest pathetic joke, spending 20 minutes on the Oscar (Conde Naste) Vanity Fair red carpet, where no one wanted to talk to you and you couldn't easily wipe your mouth when you had to kiss the little tantrum throwing wifey on the mouth for the cameras, like a good little CAA automoton. And I still don't know if I can forgive you for being so fucking careless and dissociated from your own life and moral fiber that you wore the colors of the Nazi Flag while parading the precious antisemite for your debut. Actions matter and for a smart man you do some really stupid things!

I know it seems I took a bit of a turn at the end there- just a reminder you really suck right now as a human being so you may want to think about how you can change all that, just like how Ghosted could have been better if you had your head out of your ass.

Have a great day, you prick 🫶!

[slxsherwriter]

Friday Nights

Fandom: Halloween 2007

Pairings: Zach Garrett x unnamed female oc

Word Count: 5,153

Warnings: Domestic violence, abusive relationships, drinking

Author's note: I honestly had forgotten that I had this sitting away. This was part of Nano 2023, and it hadn't seen the light. Big thanks for @tinalbion for reading through this and telling me the flow wasn't as terrible as I thought. You are wonderful! Cruddy gif is my own. Had to look everywhere to find the theatrical cut of Halloween since that is the only version that Bill's character Zach appears in.

Friday nights had always been theirs, a time to unwind, relax, and have the company of someone that they actually enjoyed. Zach couldn't recall a time at this point in his life where it hadn't been the two of them on a Friday night. It didn't matter where. Her place, his, a bar chosen at random. The location never really meant anything. They could make do anywhere and everywhere. It just couldn't be missed and couldn't be messed up.

The exception to that rule had been if one of them was too ill or got stuck at work. Otherwise, the start of the weekend was a sacred time for them both. In the near fifteen years that they had been friends, that hadn't changed. No one else was allowed to encroach on the time. And no one ever had. Relationships came and went, each of them thinking that they had found somebody only to have Things fall through for one reason or another. Through it all, the Friday night get togethers never ceased. It was the one thing that they could each rely on no matter what happened in life.

That was until now. When she had called and said that she wouldn't be able to make their Friday get-together, Zack had thought that she was sick. He had offered to bring her whatever she needed, making the assumption that she was staying home. When she had told him that she was meeting up with a guy, a tightness in his chest formed. That wasn't right. Still, he managed to be a good friend and congratulated her. He was able to spit out the words that he was happy for her, even if they felt like acid on his tongue. He's supposed to should be thankful. She hadn't done it in person, which made it much easier to be able to lie. She would have known right away that he wasn't being genuine if she had been able to see his face. So, Zack did the only thing he could think to do. He picked up a shift at Smith Grove for Friday night. It would at least keep his mind off everything. There was a small selfish part of him that hoped it didn't go well, and if it didn't, he wouldn't be available for a phone call. The thought did make him feel a little guilty, but at the same time, it was fueled by hurt.

Friday night came and went, and there was no phone call. He felt it was safe to assume that everything had gone well. He wasn't sure if that made him feel better or worse. Though he didn't have to wait long to get more information. Midday Saturday, he had received a text from her. It was another apology for cancelling last minute, but in addition it included how wonderful the date had gone. Another false sentiment of happiness was given. Then she confirmed that they were indeed on for the following friday, that she wouldn't be cancelling and that she would be buying drinks. Zack didn't have the heart to say anything else to that besides agreeing. Maybe this thing with this guy would fizzle out, as they often did. If he could consider his luck with relationships bad, hers was worse. Maybe things could have been different, could be different if he could get his head out of his ass and actually say something to her. But the fear of ruining the friendship was far too high.

*******************

Things felt odd all week, something that he couldn't seem to shake. Like something was looming overhead, await that was pressing down and affecting every aspect of his life. Well, Fridays had always been that chance at releasing anything and everything that had built up during the week. This Friday almost seemed to be adding to the pressure. Deciding to have a fuck all attitude, Zack had invited her over to his place for the night. He did not feel like being out among the public or dealing with anybody else. And the thought of running into whoever it was that she was seeing made his stomach churn. Safety of his home was far better.

A knock on the door was the only signal that he got that she had arrived. Nothing about the fact that she had made her way inside with a simple knock to announce her presence was unusual. Hell, they even had spare keys to each other's places if something were to go wrong or the other needed something. But something about tonight felt just as off as the rest of the week had. He shoved it to the back of his mind for now, wanting to focus on having a pleasant Friday evening with her. There was plenty to drink in his fridge, and by the sounds of it, she had brought even more. She had said that she would be buying so he wasn't all that surprised. Coming out of the office, he found her setting a couple of bottles on the counter and two cases of beer in the fridge.

"Hey, was wondering where you were," she greeted softly with a smile. The one that he always enjoyed seeing. It softened her face a bit, brightened her eyes.

"Sorry, was just finished up some things needed for work."

"They got you pulling mandated overtime again?"

"Nah, that was all last week." She scoffed, and he couldn’t help but smile. Always worried about him and the work that he did. It seemed that wouldn't change.

"Got your favorite, figuring that I owed at least that much." He shook his head and leaned against the counter as she finished up in the refrigerator.

"It's really no big deal, you know that."

"See, that's how I know you are wrong." There was a pause between them, but it didn't feel awkward like Zach half expected it to after last week. Instead, the silence that stretched between them held the same level of comfort that it always did. There was not always a constant need to fill that stretch of time with sound. A rare occurrence that he found. Most people seemed to always feel the need to ruin a quiet moment. She never had, contented to move through time on the same level that he did. "You know I wouldn't have canceled unless it was something important."

"I know. And you know that you don't need to go apologizing. Really, it is okay. You're here now, and that is what matters, right? So, why don't we crack open one of these bottles and get started while waiting for the rest of that to cool down?" He reached for one of the bottles of whiskey. Seemed like a good place to start as any. She held up her hands in a gesture of surrender before moving to grab them both some glasses as he opened the bottle and reached for his phone to order some pizza. If the plan was to drink even half of what she had brought, they would need some food. Thank God he didn't have to go to work tomorrow. It wasn't as easy to pull off this shit as it had been even just a few years ago. Not that they always drank heavily, but it looked like the night's aim would be to make up for the missing day last week.

That observation hadn't been all that far off. A bottle down along with a couple of cans of beer and Zach was feeling the pleasant haze of being drunk beyond a shadow of a doubt. Relaxed on the couch beside his friend, thoughts were anything but platonic. She was nearly plastered into his side, laughing as they talked about some of the ridiculous things that they had done when they were younger.

"You remember when we were out for my twenty-first, and that asshole at the bar wouldn't leave me alone?" Zach chuckled and shifted an arm around her, keeping her close to this side, even if the action was unnecessary. There was nothing strange about cuddling. Nope.

"Man would not take anything for any answer. Still swear I shoulda knocked the shit out of him."

"Yeah, but that would have gotten us kicked out. Instead…" He shook his head a little and squeezed her shoulders.

"Instead, I pretended to be your boyfriend. We didn't hear the end of it that night." It wouldn't have been a bad thing, but all of their friends had thought it was ridiculous. Why had Zach listened to a single thing that had been said that night? How different things could be.

"It's your fault for just coming up and kissing me without saying a damn thing!" She laughed. While the memory had been amusing, it was also one of those that Zach replayed over and over again in his mind. Especially when he was drinking and alone. He swallowed hard for a moment and glanced down at her. She was snickering and laughing a little too hard at the memory. Now would be an embarrassing time to let any arousal cloud over what little judgment was left. But did it matter?

Captivated. That was what he was as he watched her fondly, all while his fingers moved absently against her arm.

"It shut him right up and right down though, didn't it?" he could lean in and kiss her now. It would be so easy. As the thought became more and more enticing by the second, he had to be content with the way that he she was turning more into him, pressing into his side and wrapping an arm around his waist. Why was it a bad idea? Liquid courage at its finest, though that was not what registered in his brain. All that kept playing on repeat was that previous kiss. It would be so much better now, wouldn't it? They were closer and knew each other so much better than even then. They had been through so much more.

Before he could second guess the action, Zach was leaning in and brushing his lips over hers. The soft little gasp of surprise sent a shiver down his spine and shot the last little bit of control or thought that his brain could muster. A more insistent kiss was pressed to her lips. Much to his utter joy, she was kissing him back, that soft hand coming to rest against his neck. Nothing outside the two of them mattered. Actions were a little sloppy, the effects of the alcohol apparent, though it wasn't anything that he could give two shits about. He had her here, in his arms, kissing her with her returning the affections.

His currently unoccupied hand lifted and gently carded fingers through her hair. Giddiness, like he was a teenager all over again, forced everything else into the deep recesses of his mind. Finally. After all this time, it was finally happening. For a mere second, there was a break, both gathering their breath. Not a word was uttered. It wasn't needed. Then, she was pressing into his with far more enthusiasm, practically crawling her way into his lap and Zach had to quickly adjust, though it ended with him on his back, waist straddled and his hands against her hips. A position that he would not complain about. Ever. It could have been hours or minutes, but Zach wasn't able to tell. There wasn't any desire to pull back or shift her from his lap. Though eventually, oxygen was needed. The two were silent, looking at one another, soft smiles shared without having to say anything. Fingers gently ran over her cheek, the moment seared into his brain. He felt sleepy, warm, and comfortable. She settled down against his chest, sprawled out over him, allowing him to wrap an arm properly around her waist.

The next thing that registered was the painful bright light that came streaming through the window. With a pained wince, it took effort to manage to open his eyes. There was a warmth atop him. What had happened? Glancing down, he was greeted with the sight of air. Oh, that was right. They must have fallen asleep after drinking and…shit. They had been making out. In the light of day and with a sober mind, he realized that perhaps neither of them had made good decisions last night. Or maybe it was the best decision that he had ever made. Things were yet to be seen. He would have to wait for her to wake up to make that determination. For now, he was going to enjoy the few moments that he was gifted.

A small groan told him that she was waking up. A part of him wanted the moment to last just a little longer, selfishly enjoy something that would likely be ripped away from him in mere seconds. But there wasn't anything to do as she shifted. He could feel her lift a hand, rubbing her face.

"Morning," he murmured gently, not wanting to startle her. There was a dull throb in the back of his head, a sure sign of the hangover that would be plaguing them both as soon as they actually started to move around. There was a small grunt given in response, and he had to do his best not to laugh. It would have been a little too painful right then. She just seemed to nuzzle closer instead of pulling away. Not what he expected, but maybe she hadn't quite come out of whatever dreamland that she had been living in. While it wasn't common, it wasn't exactly unheard of that they ended up cuddled on the couch or passed out and waking up like this. He just figured it wouldn't be the case when she had whatever it was that was developing with whatever his name was.

"Shit…" She managed to slowly pick her head up before realizing what position they found themselves in. Another second, and she was picking herself up off of him. Zach immediately missed the heat. "How much did we drink last night?" His heart sunk a little when that was the first thing that she asked. Did he say anything? Would it be smart?

"Probably too damn much," he offered with a slightly pained chuckle. Zach ran a hand over his face and forced himself to sit up, where, as expected, the throbbing in his head immediately worsened. "If you feel anything like I do, I have a feeling that you'll agree."

"Yeah, okay. We overdid it." He didn't watch as she moved towards the kitchen, listening to the steps that wandered off. Perhaps she was ignoring the elephant in the room. Perhaps it was a simple case of her not remembering. Zach wasn't sure which he would prefer it to be, which might hurt a little less. Pushing the thoughts to the back of his mind in favor of heading to the bathroom, Zach could worry about it later. Things were normal otherwise this morning so why bother messing with the status quo.

*****************

She never mentioned what happened, and after a week where things weren't awkward, he figured that she simply didn't remember what had happened. He did, and it was just making things a little more difficult for him. Sure, it happened when they were both drunk, but Zach really wanted to believe that even with alcohol, she wouldn't have done anything that she didn't want to do. But, like the good friend that he was, he didn't say anything since her relationship seemed to be progressing instead of ending like things had over the last few years. She was happy, so he had to suck it up.

A few weeks went by, and everything seemed typical. Work was work, life went by, and Friday nights continued to be a source of enjoyment. He had gone on a few dates, though nothing really stuck. Everyone ended up compared to her and always fell short. Not that the reasoning was ever fully explained to her when they got together. That would ruin the whole thing that he was trying to do.

It was when a Friday night was skipped without warning that Zach began to feel a little uneasy. At first, he thought it was something that he had done. Maybe she had remembered and had decided that it was something that she couldn't handle anymore. A spiraling thought pattern that he was able to recognize. Zach had to give the benefit of the doubt, calling her to check in and see if she needed anything the next morning. That uneasy feeling grew, though, when she had said that she had forgotten to let him know that she hadn't been able to make it. Her voice sounded off. Off in a way that he couldn't place but enough to make that pit in his gut grow. The sort of off that he heard at work at times, when someone was worried or trying to hide something.

That worry grew into an all out concern when she started to not return texts and when more get togethers were missed without any sort of warning or explanation. All the way, this guy was still in her life. Concern remained present but began to share space with suspicion. Zach was simply a security guard at Smith Grove. It wasn't like he had a lot of reach or ability to look into things. But he was owed a few favors with some people who did have those abilities. Now was the time to call them in. He needed some background information on this guy that was becoming a major part of his friend's life. One that he had yet to meet, one that there was always an excuse so he couldn't. Red flags slowly began popping up left and right but until he had information and some concrete evidence.

****************

Poignantly, information came to him on a Friday night. Another night that was meant for them to spend together, and there had been nothing but radio silence. While suspicions weren't entirely confirmed, Zach didn't like the information that had been given to him. The guy had a record, and there were some things on there that were enough that it wouldn't take a leap to putting hands on someone.

He had to see her and had to check on her after not seeing her for nearly three weeks. It was the longest time that they had gone without seeing one another for almost ten years. Armed with the knowledge that there could be a potential problem when he showed up, he was prepared for all possible outcomes. Arriving at her home, the first thing that he did was try to see if the lights were on. Some sort of sign that she was there. Check. There was a soft glow coming through the curtains. Someone was home. Now, the question was if he used the key or knocked on the door. The key would give him the element of surprise, but if his concerns were correct, that sort of action could make things way worse for her. Knock on the door it was.

He waited patiently, glancing around for a moment as there was nothing but silence on the other side of the door. Another car sat in the driveway, one that he wasn't familiar with but assumed it belonged to the boyfriend. Seconds passed, which turned into two minutes before the door finally cracked open. Zach had been about ready to go for the spare key before he could see her face around the crack in the door. His stomach dropped to his feet as she seemed panicked. Not outwardly, but he could see it in her eyes. The way that they were darting back and forth, fingers fidgeting at the door. Something was very wrong.

"Hey, sweetheart. Hadn't heard from you in a bit and wanted to check in. Was worried about you." She still hadn't fully opened the door, something that hadn't escaped his notice. "Think I can come in?" Under any other circumstances, Zach would have respected whatever answer that she gave but tonight? He wasn't going to take no for an answer.

"Now really isn't a good time, Zach." The words shook, causing him to square his shoulders. Resolve washed through him, reminding him why he was where and why he was doing this.

"I'm gonna say it again. I'm worried about you." He tried to get the point across without saying it outright, but at this rate, it looked like she was going to make him. The sounds of heavy footsteps caught his attention. Whoever was in the house with her was coming to the door.

"Zach, please. Now isn't a good time." It was almost a plea. Enough so that it caused him to press his hand to the door, applying some pressure to be able to get her to open it more. A brief struggle before his willpower was the one that won out.

"I don't care what you think, I'm not leaving you like this. Not when I know something is wrong." Maybe he should have given it a little more thought, but his overriding concern was your safety. And right now? She was not safe. He could hear the angry words that were coming from the hallway right before the man appeared. All before his brain could register the bruise that was forming on the side of her face.

"What the hell is this?" Zach's eyes finally locked on the man that had been causing so many issues and found exactly what he expected. A larger than average frame, both height and weight and a look that screamed rage. Experience told him that this was going to turn into a fight rather quickly. Squaring his shoulders a bit, he was already trying to assess which would be the safest way to get her out of the line of fire and what at hand weapons were closest to grab. None of the options were particularly good, but what was he supposed to do? He was in the thick of it now. There wasn't any turning back.

"I think it's about time for you to leave." The asshole had the audacity to laugh. As much as he wanted to react harshly and immediately, Zach knew that he couldn't. He had to be the one with the level head, thinking clearly would be the thing that got them both out of this safely. It was the same as if he was handling a patient at work. The only difference? He wasn't armed with a loaded shotgun, permission to shoot if things were getting out of hand. So, the next best thing had to be done. Though, it wasn't entirely clear besides getting her out of harm's way what that thing was.

"And just who the hell do you think you are? No one. She's the one who owns this place and decides who comes and goes. And she doesn't want me going anywhere, do you, sweetheart?" Zach didn't miss the way that she seemed to cringe at the pet name, something that she had never done when he used it. It was just another sure sign that his gut feeling had been right.

"See, I know she is entirely capable of making her own decisions, but do you? Because it seems to me that she isn't overly fond of your presence."

"Fuck off and get out of the house." It was Zach's turn to make an amused sound.

"I'm not letting you hurt her anymore. So, either you get out of this house or I call the cops. And I'm not sure that you can really afford another hit on your record right now, can you?"

"Is that a fucking threat?"

"Take it as you want." The man closed down the distance, and Zach tensed, prepared to take a swing or move out of the way as quickly as possible. A good thing too as the punch came without any warning, the arm barely cocking back before flying at his face. While he attempted to dodge, he wasn't able to get out of the way of the full blow, getting clipped on the jaw. Shit, that was a hell of a punch. Probably a good thing he had not taken it full on, otherwise he might have been unconscious on the floor. With the first punch thrown, he quickly moved to put some distance between them while reaching out to grab the closest item that could be used as a makeshift weapon. "Guess that racks up assault." Maybe he shouldn't be taunting the man but he couldn't help himself.

"Danny, stop!" She had reached out to grab Danny, and Zach had to grit his teeth as the man shook her off, sending her into the wall. Just what he had been trying to avoid.

"All right, asshole. This ends now. I'm not letting you hurt her again." Instead of responding, Danny simply took a few more swings. Noot the easiest to dodge but he managed for the most part. There was one blow to his side that had the air knocked out of his lungs entirely, causing him to swing in reaction. It caught Danny on the side of his face, though given that it was an umbrella, it didn't do all that much damage. Enough to make him back off a few steps though, and it opened a cut along his cheek. The opening was enough for Zach to duck by the hulking frame. Taking a whack at Danny's legs from behind, he reached for the phone to call 911. Just two seconds were needed to make the call and get the police here.

*****

The last thing that he wanted to do was deal with paramedics or the hospital. So, as soon as Zach was able to sign the consent form, he did so. Thankfully, it didn't seem like she needed to go. The blow to the head hadn't been recent, so there was no concern for any concussion. There was still a possibility, but the chances were far lower.

Danny was hauled off to sit the night in a cell at the very least. A problem for another time at this point. Zach wanted to focus on getting her back in the house and settled for the night. Actually relax and not have to worry about anything at all.

Ushering her back into the house, the first thing that he did was make sure to remove any trace of Danny. The man had certainly made a mess of a few things. Zach knew that she wouldn't have ever stood for the beer cans laying around or the few articles of clothing that were tossed over furniture. That kept him busy and kept him moving. Preoccupied, really. That worked for a distraction while the silence between them stretched on. She hadn't said much, and it was driving him crazy. Anything would have been taken at that moment. Anger, happiness, anything. But there was nothing. He finally had to break it just to know what was going on in her head.

"Are you going to say anything?" It probably wasn't the right thing to say exactly, but it was what came to mind. A knee-jerk sort of response.

"What do you want me to say?" Her voice was soft, barely audible, but he managed to catch it. Shoulders fell, and he let out a small sigh before moving over to her.

"Anything, sweetheart. Anything at all." There was a hesitation to reach out to her like he wanted to, a nagging doubt in the back of his mind that had never been present during their entire friendship. He hated it. "Just...talk to me? Please?" If he hadn't been that close, he wouldn't have heard the sigh that slipped. Her eyes were focused down on the floor, not raising to look at him.

"I don't know what to say, Zach. I mean, you saw what happened, what he was like." She swallowed hard but didn't break. Not yet. "It's a lot to have to process, and I don't even know where to start." That was understandable and couldn't be argued. Getting over the doubt, he reached out and rested a hand against her shoulder, giving a small squeeze.

"You know that I'm here for whatever you need. I'm sorry about having to force my way in here before. It's not what I wanted to do, but I was worried about you."

"I know, thank you." After a second, she leaned forward and wrapped her arms around him. Zach immediately returned the hug, holding her close and tightly.

"I'm sorry."

"You don't have anything to be sorry for, Zach. He would still be here." Her body went slack against him further, her head resting against his shoulder, face practically in the crook of his neck.

"You deserve so much more than that, sweetheart." This was not the time that he needed to be doing this, but the words were beginning to flow without thought. He couldn't stop it now that it had started. "Someone who knows just how special you are and can appreciate everything about you." She sniffled, and his heart skipped a beat. He hadn't intended to have her cry.  She didn't say anything right away either, making him a little worried that he had indeed said the wrong thing. A little more sniffling as he held his breath, all before she was finally speaking.

"I know that, at least logically. It didn't start out like this."

"It never does. None of that is your fault. You know that, right?" He needed to hear that she knew that. She would be carrying around enough as it was. She didn't need the extra burden.

"I know that. I'm just upset that I let it get this far to begin with. I should have kicked his ass out weeks ago." He could feel the shudder that ran through her and, in response, tightened his arms around her frame. Reassurance was only going to do so much. Thankfully, she was calming down. Zach felt grateful for that, at the very least. It was something. A few more moments passed by before she sighed and pulled back a little bit. "I don't know what I would do without you, Zach." Words that he appreciated and liked hearing, but they were not exactly what he was holding out hope for. He was jumping ahead of himself right now. After what had just happened, it was the last thing that should be on his mind.

"You know that I'm here for whatever you need. Anytime." The words were easier since they were genuine. He would do anything for her. Maybe one day, she would truly see that.

[mcalhenwrites]

I'm sincerely trying to find answers to these questions. I'm seeking advice.

I'm going to start this off by stating that I'm still writing. I haven't quit. I'm not going to quit. This is about sharing. I've had so many people assume I quit writing or only will write for the sake of being a published author. I'll always be writing as long as I'm alive.

And as someone who firmly believes that people can choose whether or not to share their art with the world and no one else gets to decide that, I also believe that it's not wrong to want to have readers. Libraries and bookstores and art galleries and art sites and everything else - we connect to each other through art. It wouldn't exist if everyone just went, "Welp, I made the thing, good for me. Done!" And if someone is going to tell me that I should feel that way, I hope you keep all your writing and art to yourself. If not, I'd consider it a kindness to us both if you don't respond to this post through comments, DMs, or asks. Thank you. ;)

So onto the questions I'm seeking advice on.

How can I overcome the shame of posting writing for about 14 years and still barely getting readers? (But often getting a lot of critique?)

I've been in writing circles, reading and cheering on others, and they read one anothers' writing, but I'm frequently passed over/ignored - and that's the kinder response. I've been told that I'm there for my support only, that I'm not a good enough writer myself, that my characters are all the same.

How does one keep posting links to their published work or AO3 chapters/works, when they never get any likes or reblogs across several websites?

When friends have done nothing but scold them for not being good at PR, when I'm just... I'm a writer, not a businessman. And I am trying, but even popular authors on social media have mentioned that word-of-mouth and boosting of their work on social media has impacted their success? That M*sk taking over one of those sites has negatively impacted their interactions and therefore their sales? (Wouldn't this mean they also suck ass at PR? xD)

Am I supposed to believe I have a chance, when even established authors are struggling?

I don't like myself very much, and I'm ashamed of level of skill, even though I enjoy writing so much I can't help but always want to do it. I can't help but create stories and get excited about writing them down. There are even times I feel like I've made progress. Gotten better as a writer.

But it's so hard not to end up letting other people make me feel ashamed.

It's true I shouldn't listen to those people, but why have they been so many, and why is the positivity always so few and far in-between? Maybe if it was one voice in one-hundred, but what if it's twenty voices out of thirty? What am I to believe then? When even friends clearly have no faith in my works and don't want to be seen associating with it?

I wanted to be a published writer. I wanted to make a little bit of an income on writing, so I'd have reason to do what I love even more.

But I've spent most of my life feeling like a fool who keeps humiliating himself. Who wonders if the truth is that I'm worse at writing than even I'm willing to admit.

I had one story that "took off" on AO3, but even that lost readers by the end, and no one is interesting in anything I have created before or since then.

And that story... I've been editing it heavily and even added chapters, and I'm like, "I should post the new version sometime" but I'm convinced no one even wants it. (And I'd have to do it for free, and I can't afford to do things for free. I just got on medicaid finally and went to a food pantry last week and keep applying for help, and I have to wait until April to see a doctor to get critical help for my multiple health issues that might make my ability to work even harder. I broke down and crocheted stock for a table this month, and the pain in my wrist is excruciating, and the pain my heart that I can't spend half that time making personal passion projects with something I only want to do as a hobby is even more excruciating. So no, not every story of mine can just be churned out for free.)

Anyway, thank you for reading and your time, and if you have legitimate advice/answers/support... I could use it. I could use it more than ever. 

[crinkled-emotions]

Day 31: Free Day (Surprise fic!)

This one... oof. I can't believe it's finally here.

I'm super grateful to those people who have sent in asks or commented on the fics, I honestly didn't think I'd be able to get to 31 🥺 I talked more about it on the Ao3 version of this because tumblr is a NIGHTMARE for hate asks atm.

Warnings: Carole's cancer diagnosis and discussions of cancer-related complications, Goose's accident, Hangman's fear of not being fast enough to get to Mav and Rooster during the Dagger mission. Rooster also puts himself back into therapy.

This fic also contains Hangster and a couple of very special guests!! I really went loose with this one, I didn't edit it particularly hard nor did I think about whether it would be received well. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did writing it 🥹

-

-

“Jake Seresin, you have three seconds to get over here and explain yourself!”

Hangman’s head shot up, glancing over the back of the couch in Maverick’s hangar. Coyote frowned from beside him, following his gaze to see three figures coming into the space.

“Oh shit,” Hangman hissed, “I gotta hide.”

He got up and made an abrupt disappearing act into the hangar, Coyote calling after him but to no avail. Phoenix was standing too, beaming as she ran to give one of the people coming toward them a hug.

“Oh my god, I haven’t seen you in forever! How are you?”

“Honey we are doing just fine.”

Phoenix folded into the older woman’s arms, surprisingly affectionate with her which the others were now watching closely considering Phoenix was more likely to bite someone’s head off rather than giving them a hug.

“You’re here!”

Maverick came out of the airstream, Rooster following shortly after. He stopped dead in his tracks halfway down the stairs, eyes widening.

“Mom? Dad?”

-

Carole surged forward, leaving Goose in his wheelchair for a moment to wrap her son in a hug.

“Bradley,” she breathed. Nothing more needed to be said.

“What the fuck?”

Sorry. Except for that. Thanks Fanboy.

“Uh- guys, uh... meet my parents. This is my mom, Carole... and my dad. Goose.”

Rooster helped his dad join the group, gently touching his shoulder.

“You okay, dad?”

“Better than you,” Goose retorted, earning an eye roll. Carole swatted Rooster’s shoulder and then extended her arms to give Maverick a hug too.

“And you, Maverick, what were you thinking?!”

“Carole, I-“

“-god, if we’d lost both of you...”

She pulled away, tears in her eyes as she looked between Rooster and Maverick, then sighed.

“Is Jake here?”

“Mom...” Rooster started carefully but she held out a hand.

“I just want to talk to him for a moment.”

“He’s down the back, ma’am,” Bob offered. Carole waved at him, pressed a kiss to Goose’s lips and Rooster’s temple then made her way through the collection of vintage cars and a plane or two. The Daggers turned toward Rooster, gobsmacked.

“Why the hell are your parents all buddy buddy with Maverick?” Payback demanded. Rooster just smirked.

“Have you not been listening for the last six weeks?”

-

“Jake, I know you’re back here.”

Hangman grimaced, slowly turning toward Carole. The older woman stood by the photo wall, arms crossed.

“Ma’am, I-“

“-since when have I been ma’am to you? Honey you were there for three Christmases, you don’t ever need to ma’am me.”

Hangman grimaced, leaning on the workbench.

“I said some really awful things to Rooster- Bradley. I said things I didn’t mean and now he’s mad as hell. How are you not pissed at me for everything I’ve done?”

“I don’t think he is, and I’m certainly not. Yours and Bradley’s relationship ended but that doesn’t mean I stopped worrying about you.”

Carole and Goose had taken Jake in all those years ago when Rooster took him home for the first time, constantly looking to him for reassurance because he didn’t know what it was like to have a supportive, welcoming family. Goose was paralysed from the neck down but he didn’t let it affect his charm and his sense of humour; Carole had survived what was almost terminal cancer and she still held her own against her incredibly stubborn son and husband. Hangman cleared his throat, eyes falling to the concrete flooring.

“I thought they were dead.”

“I can’t imagine how scared you must have been. You and Bradley...”

Carole Bradshaw was fun loving, loud and the life of the party at all times but she also raised what could only be described as a handful of a son with a gentle hand and her maternal instincts came out with almost everyone she met, Hangman included. He’d spent many a night sitting up with her, the two of them the insomniacs of their relationships, just talking about anything and nothing.

She was the mother figure he’d never had.

“Jake. Are you okay?”

“No,” he choked out. Carole’s eyes softened and she stepped forward to pull him into a hug.

-

“So what Bagman said, about Mav and your dad-“

“-it’s true, my dad and Mav were at TOPGUN when the accident happened. My dad was in a coma for... a really long time. When he did finally come around he couldn’t feel anything from his chest down. All the PT in the world can’t fix the kind of paralysis he has.”

“Man, that must have been really difficult for you. I’m sorry.”

Bob’s voice broke the silence first. Rooster hummed.

“I remember my mom was doing the laundry once and she just started bawling. Mav said she found a load of my dad’s clothes she’d forgotten about and it just... yeah. I don’t actually remember seeing dad all that often, one minute he was gone and the next he was sitting in his new wheelchair at home and he couldn’t pick me up anymore.”

Phoenix’s brows furrowed.

“I can’t even imagine. Your mom was sick too, right?”

“It was three years of hell.”

Maverick and Goose joined the Daggers by the couches, Maverick ruffling Rooster’s hair as Rooster glanced over at his dad.

“You handle the drive alright?”

“Yeah, fine. How about you kid, you doing okay?”

“Just glad to be on the ground,” Rooster said quietly. He felt Goose gently touch his shoulder.

“We’ll talk about this later.”

Rooster hummed, glancing around.

“Where did mom go?”

“I’m here honey. Have you told them about the Walmart diaper story yet?”

“Mom,” Rooster groaned as Carole and Hangman appeared from the back of the hangar. Phoenix’s eyes lit up and she scooted over on the couch to make room for Carole.

“Wait, I haven’t heard this one. I thought I had all the BB Blackmail.”

“The what?”

“Oh, Roos,” Hangman shook his head, “you have no idea.”

-

That evening Carole and Goose retired to the house beside the hangar- Maverick tended to sleep in the airstream in the hangar itself but the house had been specifically fitted with everything Goose needed for his wheelchair access including the bathroom and kitchen. The Daggers rolled out their swags across the hangar but stayed up a little longer to talk. Everyone started to drift off except Rooster and Hangman, sitting up on the couches together with a beer in hand.

“I don’t get it,” Hangman said, “you almost lost your parents and you still cut Maverick off.”

“Jake I don’t want to get into this with you,” Bradley groaned.

“No, you listen to me. Mav might have a couple screws loose but he must have done it for a reason.”

“I think my mom had something to do with it. She always went quiet when I started talking about the Navy or begging to get my licence.”

“Can you blame her? She almost lost her husband and her best friend in one hit.”

“Yeah, I do blame her. This was so fucking important to me, it was all I could talk about.”

“I know, Bradley, I remember when you found out why you were four years behind everyone else.”

Hangman took a sip of his beer, eyes to his lap.

“Left me in the dust.”

“Jake, I don’t know what to tell you.”

“I’m going to bed. Drink some water before you try to sleep.”

Hangman stood, collecting the beer bottles around the hangar to put in the trash before rolling out his swag. Rooster sighed.

“Jake, I’m sorry.”

“Goodnight.”

-

Carole and Maverick stood out in the bright morning sunlight just outside the hangar doors, drinking coffee and looking over the desert.

“How long were Hangman and Bradley together?” Maverick asked.

“Almost four years. Bradley was never the same after he found out about his papers.”

“Couldn’t get off his perch?” Maverick supplied. Carole laughed.

“Sure.”

Then she turned to face Maverick properly.

“What happened on that mission, Pete? Bradley calls after deployments but he doesn’t spend hours just sitting there listening to us babble. I’ve never seen Jake that haunted either.”

“You really want to know?” Maverick asked. When Carole just glared at him he sighed.

“Alright, we better sit down. Let’s go inside.”

They headed into the house, taking a seat at the dining table. Carole reached over and squeezed Maverick’s hand.

“I know this one was different.”

“I didn’t expect to come home from this one.”

“Pete you say that all the time-“

“-no I mean it. I saw the mission plan and I knew someone wasn’t coming home. If that was going to be the case, I wanted it to be me.”

“Pete, you did that. Everyone made it thanks to you.”

“How much did Bradley tell you?”

“Enough to know I could have lost both of you.”

“It’s a good thing Jake was spare; I knew if it came down to it he would be the one who’d push their jet to the limits to help in time without hesitating. He might be an ass at the best of times but he saved our lives. I’ll forever be grateful for that.”

Carole glanced down at her coffee cup.

“I think something shook loose in Bradley this time.”

“Me too.”

Maverick touched her hand, gesturing toward the bedroom.

“How’s he doing? Anything from the docs?”

“Oh, the usual. The nerve pain isn’t any better but he doesn’t want to tell Bradley.”

“We spent too long keeping secrets from Bradley, Carole.”

“I know, I just... he’s doing so well at work and the way he was last night- that’s the Bradley I know and love. He was smiling and laughing like I haven’t seen him in years.”

Maverick smiled.

“Yeah, I thought so too. Just... talk to him.”

“I will.”

Carole got up, rinsing out her coffee cup.

“You think he’s going to be okay?”

“He’s tough.”

“But is he going to be okay, Pete?”

Maverick frowned.

“I don’t know, Carole. All we can do is make sure he knows we’ve got his back.”

-

“So your mom looks good.”

“Are you flirting? Phoenix, she’s my mom.”

Phoenix gaped at Rooster for a second, then she burst out laughing and took his cup of coffee from him.

“Shut up, god knows you’re still flirting with Hangman after all these years.”

It was Rooster’s turn to stare hopelessly at her. She elbowed him in the side.

“Seriously. I haven’t seen your mom smile that hard in years-“

“-Bradley! Come help with breakfast!”

Carole called out the front door of the house and Rooster smiled at her over his shoulder.

“Be there in a second, mom!”

He took his coffee back from Phoenix and drained the mug, planting it back in her hand.

“Thanks for... everything, Tash.”

He headed back for the house when Carole yelled again, leaving Phoenix staring blankly after him. She heard someone else approach her from behind and smiled when she realised it was Bob and Fanboy.

“I didn’t think he knew how to smile,” Fanboy started. Bob nodded.

“It felt like I was talking to a brick wall sometimes, but this Rooster? It’s almost unsettling.”

“You know the story about his papers?” Phoenix asked them, both men shaking their heads. Phoenix sighed.

“Well, uh, after Mav and Rooster’s father were in a really awful crash, and Rooster’s mom beat cancer by the skin of her teeth, Rooster thinks she wasn’t down for him risking his life like Maverick still does and his father did. Apparently it was all he could talk about from the moment he was old enough to understand the Navy.”

“My dad’s a rancher, I wanted to be one for years too,” Bob supplied but Phoenix cleared her throat.

“It went so much deeper than that. Mr Bradshaw almost died from his injuries and then the infection he sustained later on. I don’t think Carole could have handled losing Bradley too, so Rooster thinks she might have asked Mav to pull his papers from the Naval Academy. It set him back four years which is how we ended up in the same TOPGUN class with Hangman. I don’t know all the details but I think Rooster’s finally made peace with whatever happened between then and now.”

Bob was quiet for a moment, processing everything, but Fanboy’s brows furrowed.

“Why was he so damn bitchy with Mav if it was his mom that pulled his papers?”

“You’d have to ask him.”

“No thanks,” Fanboy and Bob said simultaneously, earning laughter.

“He lived with him.”

They all jumped when Hangman appeared beside them, eyes on the desert in front of them rather than looking toward his teammates.

“What?”

“When things got really bad, Rooster moved in with Mav.”

Phoenix sighed.

“That tracks.”

“Is he gonna be pissed you can’t keep your mouth shut?” Phoenix asked Hangman, who just shrugged.

“He’s already pissed.”

“Daggers! Breakfast!”

The conversation was cut short by Maverick calling out for everyone to come eat, Payback and Coyote emerging from the hangar and Phoenix following the others down the hill where they’d been talking.

-

“Mrs Bradshaw, can I ask- Bradley Bradshaw?”

Carole smiled at Payback, patting his hand.

“He didn’t tell you?”

“Mom,” Rooster started quietly which immediately had everyone’s attention. Phoenix put her fork down, raising an eyebrow.

“No, please tell us. What are we missing?”

“When Bradley was born, his mom was-“

“-dad.”

The Cheshire-cat grin on Hangman’s face told the others he hadn’t heard this story either. Goose glanced between the Daggers then he smiled. Rooster put his head in his hands.

“So Mav and I were on base when Carole called to say she was in labour. It was just lucky that we were only a half hour away instead of being deployed so we were able to get to the hospital fast.”

Goose’s eyes met Carole’s and he smiled softly at her. Phoenix wondered what it was like to be that in love, then almost choked when she realised Hangman had a matching fond look on his face... directed at Rooster.

“Anyway, so we get in the room and Carole is doing her thing and she looks me dead in the eye... says she wants to call him Bradley then just starts laughing. I thought it was a joke, but the second Mav held him he says he looks like a Nick Junior. We compromised; my middle name is James, so...”

“Oh my god. Your middle name is James?” Phoenix says. Rooster sighed.

“Alright, let’s hear it.”

“We didn’t mean to call him BJ, it just happened.”

The Daggers frantically tried to avoid eye contact with one another so they didn’t burst out laughing, but Phoenix rested her head on Bob’s shoulder to stifle her giggling and that was it for the rest of them. Rooster rolled his eyes.

“I’m spitting in your food tonight.”

“How sweet, BJ!” Phoenix grinned. Even Maverick was smiling as he shook his head.

“I swear I work with teenagers.”

-

“How are you doing, kid?”

Rooster glanced over as his dad came into the living room, sending him a soft smile.

“I’m okay.”

“You’ve been quiet.”

“Dad. I don’t want to talk about it.”

“I know, B.”

Neither Goose nor Carole called him any variation of Rooster; it was always his first name or a nickname. Bradley’s shoulders relaxed and he shrugged.

“Look, it’s fine, it’s no big deal.”

Goose frowned.

“Well, from experience, almost dying is a big deal. Almost dying twice? I mean, I’m surprised you’re not drunk under a tree kid.”

That earned a snort.

“Bradley, you came home different.”

His eyes dropped to his lap and he took a deep breath.

“I know.”

“Kid, no one expects you to have it all together.”

That seemed to unlock something and Bradley hummed, then cleared his throat.

“Bradley?”

“Dad I can’t- I can’t breathe.”

“Alright, put your head between your knees. You’ve done this before, it’s okay.”

“Is he okay? Bradley, sweetheart what’s going on? Goose?”

Carole appeared from downstairs, rubbing her hand over her son’s back and cupping his forehead.

“Just breathe, honey. In through your nose, out through your mouth.”

Bradley did as his father had said, focusing on the air moving through his lungs. He heard his mother talking to him and his father softly, her hand firm on his back. He might have been in his thirties but times like these brought him right back to his teenage years when everything was too much, or when he and Jake broke up and the only person more upset had been his mom.

“Fuck, Roos. You good? I thought you said these stopped.”

Somehow Bradley had missed the door opening. His head shot up to find Hangman standing by the entrance to the living room, arms crossed over his chest. He strode across the room and pulled the curtains shut then went into the kitchen. Carole gently brushed Bradley’s curls from his face.

“Say the word and he goes.”

“No, no it’s okay,” he managed to get out, carefully working himself back upright. Goose watched him for a moment.

“Feel okay?”

“God, no.”

-

“How long has it been since you, your parents and Mav were all in the same room?”

Rooster glanced down at Phoenix’s head on his shoulder as they sat on a picnic blanket, looking over the sunset. She glanced up at him, waiting for an answer.

“Too long,” he sighed. Phoenix smiled.

“It must be weird having all three parents in the same room.”

“Scary to think I could have had none of them. I can’t- if I’d lost them...”

Phoenix touched his shoulder.

“But you didn’t.”

“I almost did. All three of them, at various stages. For a while there it felt like the moment I caught my breath it would all go bad again.”

“I know.”

She did, of course she did. She’d been the one to find him in the barracks, staring helplessly at his phone. Hangman was long gone at that point, so Phoenix had booked him a flight home and urged him to speak to his CO about leave. Initially his leave request was denied but a call from a certain Admiral had made it so he had a couple days to go home and be with his family when his mom had a scare at a check up scan.

“I think I’m going to lose them, Tasha.”

“Oh, Roos.”

“Mom’s been in remission for almost three years and dad’s not in any immediate danger but Mav... it’s so fuckin’ stupid.”

“It’s not; Mav lives life on the edge,” Phoenix reassured. Rooster snorted.

“Yeah.”

“Well, have you spoken to him about it?”

“Pot, kettle, black.”

Phoenix punched his shoulder.

“Maybe he could use a reminder about what he’s got to come home to. It must have been difficult juggling holidays if you couldn’t even be in the same room together.”

“Oh no, we had it down to a fine art. I got Christmas but I made sure to be busy at Easter-“

“-you mean drunk.”

“I mean drunk.”

Rooster sighed, nudging Phoenix’s shoulder.

“I gotta sort my shit out with Seresin, I’ll come find you later.”

“Go get ‘em, Roo. Get laid.”

Rooster rolled his eyes as he stood, dusting off his jeans before he headed to find Hangman sitting with Payback and Fanboy arguing about college football.

“Hey, Seres- uh, Jake. Can we talk?”

“Sure.”

He scooted over on the couch but Rooster shook his head.

“Not here.”

Fanboy and Payback exchanged a look.

“No, man, you guys stay here. We can argue about football elsewhere.”

Payback stood, grabbing Fanboy by the end of his jacket to get him to follow. Hangman stood.

“Look, Bradshaw, I-“

Rooster gently took him by the arm and led into the airstream, closing the door behind him.

-

Hangman’s brows furrowed.

“What are you doing?”

“Thanks for earlier. When I-“

“-yeah, don’t sweat it.”

A pause.

“So... was that it-“

“-I’m sorry for what I did to us.”

Jake’s eyebrows shot up.

“Bradley... that was three years ago.”

“Did you move on? See other people?”

“Not like I saw you.”

Rooster leaned back against the kitchen counter.

“I’m sorry.”

“I know.”

The tension in the tiny airstream could have been cut with a knife. Hangman crossed his arms over his chest; Rooster reached out to touch him but stopped at the last second. The last thing he wanted Jake to think was that he was apologising for sex. To his surprise Jake met him halfway, lacing their fingers together.

“All I ever wanted was for you to talk to me.”

“I didn’t know how.”

“Do you now?”

“I want to try.”

Jake’s shoulders settled.

“Bradley, this... I can’t go another round if you’re going to get cold feet and leave again.”

“I’m not talking out of my ass, Jake.”

“Fucking prove it, because I won’t do this again.”

Bradley reached into his pocket and pulled out his phone, tapping away for a moment. Jake watched him, brows furrowed.

“Are you seriously answering a text right now?”

“No, I’m pulling up an appointment. Look.”

He thrust the phone into Jake’s hand. Sure enough, it was an appointment confirmation booking for a therapy centre in San Diego.

“Wait, this isn’t the VA-“

“-I don’t want to talk to someone who’s associated with the Navy, my... issues aren’t with the Navy. They’re issues from my childhood, shit I never talked about. Not even with my parents or Mav.”

Jake swallowed, passing the phone back.

“Is this some adrenaline thing? Get back on dry land, sleep with your ex, trauma gone and appointment cancelled?”

“No.”

For some reason, he believed him. Maybe it was because he could hear the sincerity in Bradley’s voice, the way he ducked his head to meet Jake’s eyes. He didn’t tense up when Jake put a hand on his chest, leaning in to press a kiss to his cheek.

“If we’re serious about this, we do it properly. No sex, no making out to avoid talking about our feelings. I don’t care if it sounds dumb, I want to know what’s going on with you.”

“I know. I’m going to try. I don’t want to let you down ever again.”

Jake didn’t know if he was a weak man, a dumb man or a whipped man, but he didn’t shy away when Bradley leaned in and kissed him softly.

“I missed you, darlin’,” he whispered, hands finding Bradley’s hips.

“I missed you too. I’m sorry.”

“I know.”

Jake wrapped him in a hug, burying his face against Bradley’s neck. When he opened his eyes, he groaned.

“We have paparazzi.”

“What?”

Bradley pulled away, glancing over his shoulder.

“Guys,” he groaned

“Carry on!” Phoenix called through the open window, Coyote holding up a bowl of what looked like popcorn.

“Are they back together yet?” Carole called from the couch.

“Yes, mom, we’re back together.”

Jake and Bradley exchanged a look, then Jake took him by the hand.

“We can talk more later when we get back to San Diego.”

“I’d like that.”

-

“We did good, Goose.”

Goose hummed, watching the Daggers playing dogfight football on the empty tarmac.

“We did, honey.”

Carole squeezed his hand.

“You owe me twenty bucks.”

“You bet they’d be back together when we got here!” Goose protested. She sent him a look and he sighed.

“We share an account honey.”

“You’re no fun.”

“I have a better idea.”

They exchanged a look, then Carole squeezed his hand and stood.

“Mav! You lost!”

“Fuck.”

-

[kaija-rayne-author]

I went thrifting with the kids a couple of days ago and I'm still in so much pain it's making me teary. I don't cry easy. My therapist scolds me about it. 5 hours of shopping with two well behaved kids and I sat down through most of it. I could really use a wheelchair, but I can’t afford one. It would have to be electric, because my EDS is degenerative.

Guess I'm stuck in bed again.

I really wish people would understand that I would give so much to be able to just... live. Even the limited existence I had before covid was better than it is now. I can't go to a movie, or the zoo, or the aquarium. I leave the house for supplies and medical care. That is literally it. I risk my immunocompromised life every time I leave the house because people won't mask. I risk my minor children's lives and my partner's too. We're all immunocompromised.

I used to hike, ride horses, dance, bike, practice 3 types of martial arts.

Then I caught swine flu and my body gave up. I was diagnosed with me/cfs (which is now usually considered a post viral illness, meaning you got sick with a virus and never got better).

Then 3 years ago, I caught version 6 of the first wave of covid. I barely survived, but I never got better.

I honestly can't imagine how people can be so blasé about viruses. They can absolutely destroy your life. They've destroyed mine. I was healthy! I exercised and ate well! I was vaccinated! (Antivaxxers fuck off. I have science degrees, you're really badly misinformed.) I did everything right and it still took me down.

There's nothing you can do behavior wise that will guard you from viruses except masking, vaccinations, and social distancing. Setting up air cleaning options helps too, but since we can't even get people to mask, I'm not holding my breath on that one. (Har, har, I'm hilarious.) Vaccinations are imperative, but they don't do anything for transmission. They exist so that if you do get it, you have a better chance of survival.

And humanity could have defeated this illness 3 years ago. Except because selfish people wanted their 'normal' back... we didn't. PSA? Your 'normal' sucked a lot for disabled people already. It's worse now.

I do the best I can, but it has robbed me of so much. My scientific career, my ability to make a living that doesn't mean just scraping by well under the poverty line.

I can't hike anymore, or bike, the brain knowledge of my decades in martial arts and dance is still there, but I probably couldn't take a hit anymore. Being around horses again is an impossible dream.

Hell, just getting out of bed some days is an impossible dream.

I have nightmares of being without a mask, and people walk around bare faced.

I fucking guarantee there isn't a 'fun' thing on this planet that is worth living like I do.

The worst isn't when the virus kills you, it's when you survive it and have so little ability left.

And more people survive SC19 than die from it. They survive, but millions of people are already disabled from it and the numbers rise every day.

How are people not fucking terrified? How?