#but can definitely apply to many situations

[etz-ashashiyot]

Compassion check: Do you

Want an end to the violence that both sides find to be acceptable (or at least they can live with the compromise), even if it isn't your ideal perfect solution?

Want as few people to die as possible, even the people on the "wrong side"?

Accept that you may need to put aside your own views and biases and prioritize what the people you're advocating for are actually asking?

Understand that your thoughts, feelings, emotions, and your self-understanding of your motives are less important than other people's actual lives?

Accept that you will need to take the time to empathize with the "enemy" in order to understand what they actually want, need, think, and feel in order to situate your responses in relationship to that reality?

Accept that if there is a solution that lifts up both peoples and allows everyone to move forward in a mutually beneficial way, you should throw your whole weight behind it because it'll help the people you're advocating for, even if it helps the "enemy" side too?

Understand and accept that you cannot rewrite or undo history, but you can help people move forward and make an active choice to prioritize forward thinking?

Know and have sat with the facts on the ground, have verified them from friendly and unfriendly sources, and are willing to acknowledge the truth of inconvenient facts and other people's truths in addition to your own?

Understand and accept that you not only should, but must call out poor behavior and bad actors in your movement in order to preserve its integrity?

If so, then maybe you're ready to be an activist on behalf of another group. If not, you are neither mature enough nor compassionate enough to act as an effective advocate and/or mediator.

[haarute]

i'm sorry but as someone who is always trying to understand most things and most people, the reaction a lot of folks have of immediately dismissing something or jumping to an outrage without having a second to try to reflect on a situation or process empathy is something that i will never relate to and i consider to be a bad mentality to have if left unchecked actually

[slut4nicholas]

𝙋𝙀𝙍𝙎𝙊𝙉𝘼𝙇 𝙏𝙍𝘼𝙄𝙉𝙀𝙍 | 𝙉𝙄𝘾𝙃𝙊𝙇𝘼𝙎 𝘼𝙇𝙀𝙓𝘼𝙉𝘿𝙀𝙍 𝘾𝙃𝘼𝙑𝙀𝙕

a/n: I'm currently awake at 4 am and unable to sleep ive been having some thoughts that I needed to release, and writing this is helping me feel better. this is my first time writing something explicit, so I apologize if it's not the best. please forgive any grammar mistakes. i hope you enjoy reading it. <3

summary: you are searching for a personal trainer and come across an online ad. after calling the trainer, he arranges a session at his home gym. things start to take a spicy turn between the two of you.

warning: smut! 18+ oral (m receiving), spanking, getting manhandled, fingering, pet names like “doll, babygirl” squirting, praising, degrading, rough!!

˖⋆࿐໋

when you move to california to pursue your dream of becoming a model or influencer, you leave behind your family, job, and friends. unfortunately, the move also means leaving behind your favorite place: the gym.

many label me a gym rat, but I simply embrace my love for the discipline it brings and the amazing confidence it gives me in everything I wear.

in the evening, while browsing through tiktok , i suddenly felt a wave of boredom. i let out a sigh, turned off my phone, and began searching for an engaging activity. normally, in situations like this, i would change into my favorite workout attire and head to the gym. however, as i am not at home, i need to find a gym or a personal trainer of my own in this new location.

i opened my macbook and started searching for personal trainers in my new area. I came across a profile of a man who seems to have a lot of experience in the gym and is conveniently located nearby. i must admit, he looks delicious. i decided to message him to arrange a meeting and inquire about his session rates. he responded promptly with his pricing and availability, and it turns out he's available tomorrow morning. as we exchanged goodbyes over text, my mind couldn't help but focus on meeting him in person. if I'm already feeling this way based on some online pictures, i can only imagine how I'll feel when we meet face to face.

i wake up suddenly to the sound of my alarm. as i pick up my phone, i see that it's 5:30. the familiar feeling of nervousness churns in my stomach as i realize that I'm in a new city, about to meet someone new. i made sure to wake up extra early just to ensure that i look my best.

after my shower, i breeze through my skincare routine and add a touch of mascara and some lip balm. I'm just heading to the gym, so nothing too over-the-top, i tell myself. i apply a light moisturizing lotion and a spritz of my favorite perfume. i slip into my matching black bra and thong, then into my sleek all-black workout set with cute black leggings and a fitted black tee. i slide on my nike socks and lace up my new balance 574’s. i brush my hair and secure it with a stylish claw clip, still debating whether to leave it down or tie it up. I'll make up my mind in the uber.

i send him a text to inform him that I'm on my way to the location he had sent me. he reads the message but doesn't reply. oh well, I'm on my way already.

as we pull into his driveway, i can't help but notice how stunning his house is. i wonder what he does for work; being in california, he must be wealthy or famous. i tip my uber driver in cash, thanking him for the ride, and he wishes me luck. I'm definitely going to need it.

i grab my phone out but before i can send him a text i hear a whistle which caught my attention i looked up seeing him standing next to his front door i can’t help but check him out and oh my goodness he’s more attractive in person i can just rip his clothes off right here and there but i have to remain calm im not here for that.

he is wearing grey sweatpants and a white t-shirt, with a gold chain around his neck. his hair is lightly stuck to his forehead, indicating that he had a workout before I arrived.

“hey there” he smiles and waves signaling me to come in with his hand

i smile back and step into his house him standing behind me the whole time closing the door and walking towards me

"I'm nicholas, I'm your trainer. It's nice to meet you." oh my, his smile. his smile. his smile. I'm going to fold, i know I am, but I have to keep my calm. i don't even know him. i don't know if he's single or even married.

“hi, i’m y/n” i take his hand shaking it lightly

"come on, don't be shy," he takes us to his gym and confidently sits down on a bench, gesturing for me to sit next to him with a wave of his hand.

so demanding already.

“so tell me a little bit about yourself, i know you told me you just moved here but what’s the reason for the move and why are you looking for a trainer?” he asked curiously.

“well, i moved here to cali so it’ll be easier for me to achieve some of my goals, i have some experience in the gym but i really feel like ill learn a lot more with a trainer if that makes any sense” you smile shyly causing nicholas to chuckle a little.

“no need to be shy sweetie im here to help you you already look great im sure you’ll do a great job” i cross my legs just at the sound of his voice saying those loving praises, oh i need him so bad.

he notices but tries not to make it so obvious he grabs his water bottle taking a sip and putting down standing up tapping the side of my thigh gently “come on let’s get started”.

we begin with some easy stretches to warm up before the actual run. i couldn't help but notice that he mostly stood there, watching, instead of actively instructing and guiding me, which did bother me a bit.

“do an extended puppy pose for me” i look up at him and he just winks OH. he knows what he’s doing so i decide to play along as well.

as i get on all fours getting ready to get in the pose arching my back a little i can see nicholas from the side of my eye starting so hard i can’t help but silently giggle to myself.

“am i doing this good enough nicholas?? how’s my arch looking” he chuckles at my words a little.

“oh you’re doing so good y/n, you look amazing but i think you need a little help here” he comes down next to me getting on his knees right behind my ass and pushing my arch down so my stomach is hitting the floor beneath me.

“just like that?” I question.

“just like that, good girl” those words sent shivers down my spine i let out a soft sigh.

“what’s the matter sweetie?” he questioned.

i shake my head not responding to him “can we just do the next exercise?” i get on my knees so i can stand up but he comes in front of me putting one hand on my shoulder keeping me on my knees.

“let’s do some leg spreads i’ll help and guide you”.

i lay on the mat on my back and nicholas gets down on his knees again grabbing one of my legs bending it back a little.

“let’s start of slow sweetie i don’t want to hurt you”.

after doing a couple of reps nicholas stops and can’t help but notice something.

he chuckled “someone’s excited?”.

“what?” i ask not getting exactly what he’s talking about.

he spreads my leg a little further back.

“you’re so wet you’ve leaked through your panties it’s all on those leggings of yours”.

“i-im so sorry i-“ he cut me off.

“don’t worry about it doll, im having way more fun than you could possibly imagine” he bends down to kiss me and i went full in, tongue and everything.

after a few minutes of us making out he rips open my leggings with his bare hands which caused me to throw my head back and lightly groan, his eyes burning into my skull the whole time. never once taking those beautiful brown eyes off of me.

he pulls my panties to the side.

grabbing my mouth harshly “open and spit”.

i did as told, he sticks them in my mouth reaching the back of my throat causing to me gag.

he laughed and smiled “think you take all of my dick in there huh babygirl?”.

he pulled my panties to the side and started playing with me lightly flicking the clit and switching between fingering me and playing with my clit.

the groans escaping his mouth seemed a little animalistic like he hasn’t touched a woman in a very long time he’s eager and i can tell he wants to fuck me into the ground literally. 

“mmm you’re so fucking wet, you’ve been excited since you got here hm? or was it those photos i sent you last night that has you like this for me? horny and ready to get fucked by her trainer? it’s only day one babygirl and here you are legs spread open pussy juice dripping all over my fucking fingers, what am i going to do with you”.

i moan loudly his words. his actions. the sounds. everything just feels and sounds so fucking good i didn’t want him to stop.

“oh im gonna come” i felt the urge to release the feeling you get in your stomach when you know your going to cum and go crazy “please dont stop nicholas”.

“such a fucking good girl” he kept pumping his big thick fingers in and out of me which caused me to release all over his gym floor.

“oh shit baby, look at you fuck” he says rubbing my clit on a fast pace, i grabbed his hand trying to get him to stop since it feels way to good to handle.

“please” he grabs my face and kisses me harshly shoving his tongue all down my throat saliva dripping down in between the both of us.

“come on take this off” he removes my shirt and bra taking off what’s rest of the leggings throwing it somewhere in the gym.

he takes his shirt and sweats off leaving him completely exposed no boxers or anything on, he knew what he wanted to do.

“come on baby get on your knees let’s see if you can fit this dick all in that pretty mouth of yours, gagging on two fingers. that’s pathetic sweetheart you got to do better than that”.

i get on my knees and take his member into my hand lightly kissing and licking his desperate throbbing dick leaking pre cum everywhere, i quickly take my tongue and clean up the mess he made.

“now this is a great mouth exercise for you pretty you’ll love it” he laughs and i roll my eyes member still in my mouth looking up at him not breaking eye contact.

“oh come on” he pushes my head down taking his whole dick into my mouth repeatedly touching the back of my throat i tap and grab on his thighs signaling i needed to breath and catch my breath, he threw his head back in pleasure looking back down grabbing my hair and pulling me off of his dick.

“told you you couldn’t take it”

“mmm stop let me do it” i pout he reaches his hand and cups my cheek and caressing my hair rubbing circles on the top of my head.

i grab his dick taking him all in and taking him out grabbing it and lightly jerking him off, as i continue to jerk him off i suck off what’s left that i couldn’t fit in my mouth.

“mm fuck”

“just like that baby”

“such a good fucking girl for me”

i take him in once again feeling him twitch making sure he’s hitting the back of my throat so i can swallow all of his sweet juices.

he grabs my hair making it into a makeshift ponytail fucking my face at the perfect pace for him, he looks so good he can just take control and do what he wants at this point.

i feel him twitch again which means he’s super close this time he didn’t let me go he made sure he stayed in the back of my throat resting his cock in my mouth while he released all inside of my mouth.

“swallow that shit baby be a good fucking girl for me”

oh boy, this is just the first session i wonder what’s going to happen next time.

˖⋆࿐໋



[she-who-fights-and-writes]

“Show, Don’t Tell”…But This Time Someone Explains It

If you’ve ever been on the hunt for writing advice, you've definitely seen the phrase “Show, Don’t Tell.”

Writeblr coughs up these three words on the daily; it’s often considered the “Golden Rule” of writing. However, many posts don't provide an in-depth explanation about what this "Golden Rule" means (This is most likely to save time, and under the assumption that viewers are already informed).

More dangerously, some posts fail to explain that “Show, Don’t Tell” occasionally doesn’t apply in certain contexts, toeing a dangerous line by issuing a blanket statement to every writing situation. 

The thing to take away from this is: “Show, Don’t Tell” is an essential tool for more immersive writing, but don't feel like a bad writer if you can’t make it work in every scenario (or if you can’t get the hang of it!)

1. What Does "Show, Don't Tell" Even Mean?

“Show, Don’t Tell” is a writing technique in which the narrative or a character’s feelings are related through sensory details rather than exposition. Instead of telling the reader what is happening, the reader infers what is happening due to the clues they’ve been shown.

EXAMPLE 1:

Telling: The room was very cold. Showing: She shivered as she stepped into the room, her breath steaming in the air.

EXAMPLE 2:

Telling: He was furious. Showing: He grabbed the nearest book and hurled it against the wall, his teeth bared and his eyes blazing.

EXAMPLE 3 ("SHOW, DON'T TELL" DOESN'T HAVE TO MEAN "WRITE A LOT MORE")

Telling: The room hadn't been lived in for a very long time. Showing: She shoved the door open with a spray of dust.

Although the “showing” sentences don’t explicitly state how the characters felt, you as the reader use context clues to form an interpretation; it provides information in an indirect way, rather than a direct one.

Because of this, “Show, Don’t Tell” is an incredibly immersive way to write; readers formulate conclusions alongside the characters, as if they were experiencing the story for themselves instead of spectating. 

As you have probably guessed, “showing” can require a lot more words (as well as patience and effort). It’s a skill that has to be practiced and improved, so don’t feel discouraged if you have trouble getting it on the first try!

2. How Do I Use “Show, Don’t Tell” ?

There are no foolproof parameters about where you “show” and not “tell" or vice versa; it’s more of a writing habit that you develop rather than something that you selectively decide to employ.

In actuality, most stories are a blend of both showing and telling, and more experienced writers instinctively switch between one and another to cater to their narrative needs. You need to find a good balance of both in order to create a narrative that is both immersive and engaging.

i. Help When Your Writing Feels Bare-Bones/Soulless/Boring

Your writing is just not what you’ve pictured in your head, no matter how much you do it over. Conversations are stilted. The characters are flat. The sentences don’t flow as well as they do in the books you've read. What’s missing?

It’s possibly because you’ve been “telling” your audience everything and not “showing”! If a reader's mind is not exercised (i.e. they're being "spoon-fed" all of the details), your writing may feel boring or uninspired!

Instead of saying that a room was old and dingy, maybe describe the peeling wallpaper. The cobwebs in the corners. The smell of dust and old mothballs. Write down what you see in your mind's eye, and allow your audience to formulate their own interpretations from that. (Scroll for a more in-depth explanation on HOW to develop this skill!)

ii. Add More Depth and Emotion to Your Scenes

Because "Show, Don't Tell" is a more immersive way of writing, a reader is going to feel the narrative beats of your story a lot more deeply when this rule is utilized.

Describing how a character has fallen to their knees sobbing and tearing our their hair is going to strike a reader's heart more than saying: "They were devastated."

Describing blood trickling through a character's fingers and staining their clothes will seem more dire than saying: "They were gravely wounded."

iii. Understand that Sometimes Telling Can Fit Your Story Better

Telling can be a great way to show your characters' personalities, especially when it comes to first-person or narrator-driven stories. Below, I've listed a few examples; however, this list isn't exclusive or comprehensive!

Initial Impressions and Character Opinions

If a character describes someone's outfit as "gaudy" or a room as "absolutely disgusting," it can pack more of a punch about their initial impression, rather than describing the way that they react (and can save you some words!). In addition, it can provide some interesting juxtaposition (i.e. when a character describes a dog as "hideous" despite telling their friend it looks cute).

2. Tone and Reader Opinions

Piggybacking off of the first point, you can "tell, not show" when you want to be certain about how a reader is supposed to feel about something. "Showing" revolves around readers drawing their own conclusions, so if you want to make sure that every reader draws the same conclusion, "telling" can be more useful! For example, if you describe a character's outfit as being a turquoise jacket with zebra-patterned pants, some readers may be like "Ok yeah a 2010 Justice-core girlie is slaying!" But if you want the outfit to come across as badly arranged, using a "telling" word like "ridiculous" or "gaudy" can help set the stage.

3. Pacing

"Show, don't tell" can often take more words; after all, describing a character's reaction is more complicated than stating how they're feeling. If your story calls for readers to be focused more on the action than the details, such as a fight or chase scene, sometimes "telling" can serve you better than "showing." A lot of writers have dedicated themselves to the rule "tell action, show emotion," but don't feel like you have to restrict yourself to one or the other.

iv. ABOVE ALL ELSE: Getting Words on the Page is More Important!

If you’re stuck on a section of your story and just can’t find it in yourself to write poetic, flowing prose, getting words on the paper is more important than writing something that’s “good.” If you want to be able to come back and fix it later, put your writing in brackets that you can Ctrl + F later.

Keeping your momentum is the hardest part of writing. Don't sacrifice your inspiration in favor of following rules!

3. How Can I Get Better at “Show, Don’t Tell”?

i. Use the Five Senses, and Immerse Yourself!

Imagine you’re the protagonist, standing in the scene that you have just created. Think of the setting. What are things about the space that you’d notice, if you were the one in your character’s shoes?

Smell? Hear? See? Touch? Taste?

Sight and sound are the senses that writers most often use, but don’t discount the importance of smell and taste! Smell is the most evocative sense, triggering memories and emotions the moment someone walks into the room and has registered what is going on inside—don’t take it for granted. And even if your character isn’t eating, there are some things that can be “tasted” in the air.

EXAMPLE:

TELLING: She walked into the room and felt disgusted. It smelled, and it was dirty and slightly creepy. She wished she could leave. SHOWING: She shuffled into the room, wrinkling her nose as she stepped over a suspicious stain on the carpet. The blankets on the bed were moth-bitten and yellowed, and the flowery wallpaper had peeled in places to reveal a layer of blood-red paint beneath…like torn cuticles. The stench of cigarettes and mildew permeated the air. “How long are we staying here again?” she asked, flinching as the door squealed shut. 

The “showing” excerpt gives more of an idea about how the room looks, and how the protagonist perceives it. However, something briefer may be more suited for writers who are not looking to break the momentum in their story. (I.e. if the character was CHASED into this room and doesn’t have time to take in the details.)

ii. Study Movies and TV Shows: Think like a Storyteller, Not Just a Writer

Movies and TV shows quite literally HAVE TO "show, and not tell." This is because there is often no inner monologue or narrator telling the viewers what's happening. As a filmmaker, you need to use your limited time wisely, and make sure that the audience is engaged.

Think about how boring it would be if a movie consisted solely of a character monologuing about what they think and feel, rather than having the actor ACT what they feel.

(Tangent, but there’s also been controversy that this exposition/“telling” mindset in current screenwriting marks a downfall of media literacy. Examples include the new Percy Jackson and Avatar: The Last Airbender remakes that have been criticized for info-dumping dialogue instead of “showing.”)

If you find it easy to envision things in your head, imagine how your scene would look in a movie. What is the lighting like? What are the subtle expressions flitting across the actors' faces, letting you know just how they're feeling? Is there any droning background noise that sets the tone-- like traffic outside, rain, or an air conditioner?

How do the actors convey things that can't be experienced through a screen, like smell and taste?

Write exactly what you see in your mind's eye, instead of explaining it with a degree of separation to your readers.

iii. Listen to Music

I find that because music evokes emotion, it helps you write with more passion—feelings instead of facts! It’s also slightly distracting, so if you’re writing while caught up in the music, it might free you from the rigid boundaries you’ve put in place for yourself.

Here’s a link to my master list of instrumental writing playlists!

iv. Practice, Practice, Practice! And Take Inspiration from Others!

“Show Don’t Tell” is the core of an immersive scene, and requires tons of writing skills cultivated through repeated exposure. Like I said before, more experienced writers instinctively switch between showing and telling as they write— but it’s a muscle that needs to be constantly exercised!

If I haven’t written in a while and need to get back into the flow of things, I take a look at a writing prompt, and try cultivating a scene that is as immersive as possible! Working on your “Show, Don’t Tell” skills by practicing writing short, fun one-shots can be much less restrictive than a lengthier work.

In addition, get some inspiration and study from reading the works of others, whether it be a fanfiction or published novel!

If you need some extra help, feel free to check out my Master List of Writing Tips and Advice, which features links to all of my best posts, each of them categorized !

Hope this helped, and happy writing!

[kedreeva]

Hi Kedreeva!! You mentioned that male peafowl get aggressive when hand-raised, why is that?

There is no research done on this to be able to definitively give an answer. I've written about this before, as well, but I'm feeling chatty.

However, according to anecdotal evidence by keepers around the world, after being hand raised male peafowl treat humans the same way as they would treat a rival peacock they hold a grudge against, and the aggression is almost always worse during mating season (exception cases where it's bad all year). This would seem to indicate that instead of seeing themselves as humans, peacocks see humans as "like them" ie: peacocks, and that the aggression is hormone based.

With peafowl, a male will attempt to chase off unrelated rival males. Related males form leks, but even males that have not ever met before seem to be able to clock blood relations (this actually was confirmed in scientific study, which I have talked about before so you can find it in the peafowl tag somewhere), and whatever method they use to do this, it cannot apply to humans (because you're definitely not able to be blood related to them). As such, the solution is only EVER going to be: chase off. But, humans are not going to be chased off by a bird they are keeping in a pen, and so begins a feedback loop of stress and aggression: they try to chase you off, they can't, they get frustrated and stressed and more desperate, rinse and repeat. This eventually, even with no reinforcement from you, leads them to be stressed even just seeing you, whether or not you're interacting.

However, most people I've seen aren't just "not doing anything," they are actively reinforcing the idea that they are a threat to the bird. They yell, they make sudden movements, they kick them, they pin them to the ground, they chase them around/carry them around, they spray them with hoses, they attack them with sticks/rakes/pool noodles... I have seen the gamut. And ALL of it reinforces the idea, to the peacock, that they are DANGEROUS and should be CHASED OFF. The bird physically cannot escape in many of these situations (being penned in a flight pen), so the only option they would see is fighting.

This is ALL solved by just... not hand raising them. When they don't consider you to be a rival cock, then 99.9999% of them will be chill dudes even during mating season. They don't actually LIKE to fight, but there are certain situations which inform their instincts (instincts strengthened greatly by hormones) that they need to in order to survive/reproduce.

There is ONE potential work around I have found for hand-raised males, if it is not already too late, and that is extensive training. Stan was, by necessity, hand-raised due his medical issues early on. I trained him to jump to a treat perch when he was young, and once he got aggressive, I was able to reinforce the treat perch such that when I went into his pen, he would immediately go to that perch and he would get treats when I left if he stayed there. This didn't eliminate his stress over my presence, but it did alleviate altercations between us, and allow me to care for him properly. I have helped two other people do this with their young hand-raised males (ones they didn't know better about, and won't repeat), so I know that it CAN work for some others, but it's never going to be a good solution compared to just not fucking doing the hand raising in the first place. The birds will still be experiencing stress they shouldn't have to, and the owner will experience stress knowing that aggression is sitting just beneath the surface at all times.

[imsobadatnicknames2]

sorry to bother you and please delete this if it's too obnoxious but can you explain what was going on in that last post with the "smol bean hitler" thing I have cognitive issues and definitely want to block at least one of the people involved but I don't really understand what's being said?

Okay I don't blame you for not understanding it because there's a lot of context there. I will do my best to give a rundown of the situation and explain everything to the best of my ability, but my account of the events might be incompelte because I really didn't witness everything.

A little over a week ago, tumblr user siwolism made a post about how she watches a lot of videos about korean fried chicken, and she had noticed a trend in the comments of these videos: a lot of those videos had comments from americans (mainly black americans) bragging about how the only reason why koreans have fried chicken is because african-american soldiers took the recipe to korea during the korean war. She said that as a korean she found these comments uncomfortable because for korean people the korean war was an extremely bloody conflict and korea hasn't still fully recovering from its effects, and americans displaying such pride about any of the things they did during the korean war is an appalling display of american chauvinism. And that the fact that black americans were displaying the same chauvinistic mindset that she would have expected from whtie americans showed that being black or any racial minority in america doesn't exempt anyone from the privileges of american imperialism or the chauvinism of defending it.

At some point I got involved by making a comment on the post, about how I found it silly that people were insulting op and tagging the post as "#tw antiblackness" when all she did was complain that it's downright evil for americans, regardless of race, to joke about the time the USA invaded korea so violently that 1 out of every 10 koreans got killed.

(I still stand by that, considering that the post didn't complain about black ppl in america in general, only about the ones that she saw acting in a specific chauvinistic way, and despite how much people have accused her since of "singling out" black americans as the main beneficiaries or defenders of american imperialism, the post went out of its way to make it clear that this was just a manifestation of a wider problem that applies to all americans regardless of race)

I also made another addition to the post about how i think many of the people making those comments were probably motivated by the way so many african-american inventions in the US have their roots erased once they become popular with non-black people, but that in my opinion they were failing to understand that, despite how superficially similar they may look, "a black american telling a white american that they should be thankful because black people invented jazz and rock" is a fundamentally different situation from "a black american telling a korean that they should be thankful because black people brought fried chicken to them during the war", because the power dynamics between these two countries and the history of the korean war fundamentally changes the situation.

These additions in particular picked up a lot of steam, which somewhat accelerated the post in question breaking containment.

Siwolism was accused of being antiblack for using the term "amerikkka" in her post. Your mileage may vary on that one, but regardless of your opinion I don't think it invalidates any of the things she said in the post.

She was accused of erasing the racism and oppression that black people face in the USA. She repeatedly clarified that she (like any serious anti-imperialist) recognizes that racial minorities in the imperial core face racism and oppression, but that their oppression in that axis doesn't erase the fact that living in the imperial core puts them in a position of privilege over people in the imperial periphery.

She was also accused of erasing anti-black racism in korea (which is a complete non-sequitur tbh, unless you're interpreting her post as "all black people oppress all korean people" and not "black people in america have the capacity to act in imperialistic ways toward people in other countries"). She clarified that she thinks racial discrimination in south korea is a serious issue, that she faces a great deal of it as a north korean immigrant of hui chinese descent, but that she obviously doesn't have it as bad as the discrimination black people face in korea. However, she said the situation of a black person from korea and a black person from america is not the same with relation to imperialism, and when a black soldier is stationed in one of the numerous american military bases in korea they don't face the same struggles as a korean black person because they're acting as part of an imperialist occupying force.

As the post broke containment, she faced increasing levels of harassment. She started getting anons calling her anti-asian slurs, particularly someone who called her an "antiblack gook bitch", "gook" being a slur extensively used by american soldiers to refer to koreans during the korean war.

(that might have been the same person who left me an anon calling me a "fucking antiblack beaner" in response to my additions to silowism's post but who knows)

She also had multiple anons telling her that they hoped she and all her friends got killed by the next american soldier they encountered, which is especially vile considering that american soliders stationed in military bases in south korea have a history of killing and commiting sexual violence against korean women and facing no consequences for it, to the point that the US government coerced the South Korean government into signing a treaty that prevents any US soldiers caught comitting such acts from being tried in a South Korean court.

At some point she psoted the following meme

This is a meme that has been used numerous times on this website to make fun fo the way how a post gets misinterpreted in increasingly ridiculous ways as it gets further away from your mutual circle. I think it's clear that none of the categories on the right are targeted specifically at black people, but instead at the people running with the worst possible interpretation of anything she said in her post (a lot of whom weren't even black americans, I think it's important to acknowledge that a lot of them were white americans who were pissed of that imperialism were being called out and decided to amplify the accusations of racism because it was a progressive-sounding way to shut down discussions of american imperialism). Still, a lot of people ran with the worst faith interpreation of it and started talking about how she "literally said all black people are illiterate chimpanzees"

She also, at some point, after days of continued harrassment, told one of the people harassing her to hang themselves. Again, people ran with the worst possible interpreation of it to talk about how "she's literally sending lynching theats to black people"

Eventually the harassment was so much that she deleted her blog.

Almost two weeks later people keep playing telephone with increasingly outlandish misinterpretations of the things she said, resulting in the tags you saw screenshotted on the post you're referring to, where someone accused her of "implying black people invented imperialism"

so yeah like I'm not going to tell you who to block or even to block anyone at all, but that's my attempt at catching you up to speed on what's going on in that post.

[goldenchimmy]

Playing The Part

Pairings: Older!Jungkookxfem!Reader

Cw: age-gap, mentions of alcohol, Oral (fem receiving),Sex,pet names

Word count: 6.7K

🚫MINORS DNI🚫

Summary: needing money for college, you come across an ad for a female escort. You didn't expect the person posting the ad to be a rich, older man.

"Having a nice night?" Jungkook asked, his breath warm against your cheek as he leaned into you from behind. His hand gently sliding over the silk of your dress to playfully grab your hip. His fingers light as he swayed with you to the music with his drink occupying the other hand. The party that surrounded the both of you was nothing short of extravagant; The music was low and classy and the other party-goers were swaying and dancing with one another in the large ballroom.

This wasn't where you pictured yourself at all when you answered that ad.

                                                                                          ------

It was early winter and you were in your second year of college when you found out that your funds had run low. Your apartment rent piling up bill by bill and your fridge emptying faster than you intended. College here was expensive as it was and now you were about to be completely homeless. That was when you found an ad online requesting help from a 'Female Escort'. Usually you were the type to avoid situations like this. Ones that involved the words "Female" and "Escort". Most of the time that meant the person behind the ad was a lowlife man looking to exploit women. The worst kind you usually tried to avoid.

But this ad was different. It went into a little more detail than the title proposed. Your eyes scanned across the ad a few times, reading over the bold electronic words:

SEEKING FEMALE ESCORT

For safety purposes, I will be unnamed until the applicant reaches out to me.

I am seeking a female (age 20 to 27) who will accompany me to a few business outings. No sexual acts or public displays of affection are required to apply. I can assure you I'm not here for that. This will be a week long event and the applicant will be required to accompany myself to all events of the following week.

If she were to accept, I will pay a generous sum of money in return for her help. Seeking ASAP.

If interested, you can reach me at my business number: (xxx) - xxx -xxxx

You don't know how many times exactly that you read over the ad. Hell, you had even slept on it a couple times. But the deadline was soon and you were getting desperate. So, you grabbed your phone from off your nightstand, your fingers nervously typing against the screen as you entered the number from the ad into your phone. You had no idea what you were going to even say!

"Hey, this is a desperate woman needing money"

"I need money, I'm the girl. Pick me"

You huffed a laugh at that and shook your head. That sounded too needy and snobbish. And you definitely weren't either of those things. Eventually, you decided on a more simple approach. Even though you were nervous and your heart was beating hard against your rib cage, you tried to calm yourself as you sent the message:

'Hello, I'm interested in the ad you posted the other day.'

You waited. And waited. And waited...

Eventually you had fallen sound asleep in your bed, your phone laying on your slow rising chest, and it was still there in the morning when you rose. You were groggy as you sat up, your mouth tasting weird as you wiped the drool from your lips. Then your phone chimed and you were startled a bit as you looked at the open message screen.

Your eyes went wide as you read over the message reply from last night.

'Hello. Thank you for reaching out to me. Are you able to meet around noon today? I know that's forward but I'm crunched for time.'

Today? He wanted to meet you today?! That was a bit quick, but you shrugged it off. As you got ready for the day, you debated on even answering him. Maybe you were regretting this decision. But as you walked down the small hallway to your kitchen, your eyes caught the pile of envelopes on the dining table. Big red letters labeled "PAST DUE" marking the white parchment. That's when you took your phone and typed a reply back, your mind made up.

'Yes. I'm able to meet. Where?' you messaged, moving to the window overlooking the dirty, dimly-lit streets of downtown. It was still pretty early in the morning and you didn't have class today, so what else were you going to do? Nothing like meeting a perfect stranger to begin the day. You could only hope that you weren't getting kidnapped by this mystery man.

When noon rolled around, you found yourself sitting in a little street corner cafe. A small cup of tea on the table as you stared out the window. Watching as the people passed by. Inside the Cafe, you were mainly the only one sitting down. Other people taking their orders to go and rushing off to work.

You went to look at your phone then, passing the time by scrolling through posts and videos from friends. The quick chime of the bell above the corner of the door barely registered in your head as the time hit noon, and out of the corner of your eye you saw a pair of neat, slick shoes step over to you. "Hello." came a soft, smooth voice. And when your eyes met ones of brown, you could have sworn all the air left your lungs. This man standing above you was nothing short of the most handsome person you had ever seen.

"Uh-I-Hello..." you stammered, blushing faintly as you watched him take a seat across from you. He crossed his legs slowly, resting his hands together on the table as he watched you squirm a bit. "You-must be from the ad then?" You asked softly, meeting his gaze as you put your phone away. The man only nodded once, a small smile on his face. "My names Jeon Jungkook. I understand you're a bit nervous, but I promise you no harm." he smiled, flashing a row of platinum white teeth. He looked like a movie star.

"Uh, nice to meet you." you whispered, sipping your cup of tea that had grown cold. "You're right on time." you noted, the clock on the wall across the room striking noon. Faint jazz filled the air as Jungkook nodded. "I tend to keep a tight schedule. Its really thanks to my job." He chuckled, running a tattooed hand through his black locs. "Your job?" you asked quietly, biting your lip a bit as you tried making out what the ink read on his knuckles.

He moved them before you could as he grabbed the menu that was laying on the table, flipping through it quickly as a waitress came over to take his order. While you waited patiently for him, you gazed at him again. He was dressed in a finely tailored suit, a black tie resting on his broad chest. A silver watch on his left hand as he ordered what he wanted to the waitress who was busy flirting with him.

Jungkook had faint streaks of gray in his hair, suggesting that his age was older than yours by a few years. The laugh lines near his moving lips also another tell that he was well out of his twenties unlike yourself. You were only twenty-two. This man looked like he was well over 30. Maybe thirty-five or forty? You didn't ask, figuring it was a rude question to start out with as the waitress scurried away with his order. His attention turned back solely on you. His big doe eyes studying your face carefully before he cleared his throat, snapping you out of your deep thoughts.

"So, my job...", he started, smiling a bit. The ring in his lip moving as he did so. "I'm a CEO. I assume you've heard of Jeon Interprises? We are a start-up tech industry." He hummed, waiting for your reaction. The whites of your eyes showed slightly as they widened, nodding your head a few times. "Uh...yeah. I mean, I've heard of it. The buildings pretty huge." You smiled, tracing patterns on the wood of the table with your nail. You recalled a memory of one of your friends saying that whoever owned it was "Compensating for something." It made you giggle a bit, the sound not going unheard by Jungkook. "Something funny?" he asked, raising an eyebrow. He had a piercing there as well. It was...kind of attractive for a man his age.

You quickly shook your head, biting your lip. "No, no...just something a friend said earlier. But yes, I've heard of it. Very impressive." you nod slightly, before the waitress came back over to set jungkooks order down on the table. A to-go cup of coffee and a donut. When she left, you started again. "How old are you? If you don't mind me asking." Jungkook only smiled, sipping at his coffee after blowing on it before he answered, "I'm thirty-two. I became a CEO when I turned twenty-nine, so I'm fairly new at it still. It was a hand-me-down from an older brother of mine."

You nodded, considering his words before asking another question. "So...then why the ad?" you smiled a bit, before continuing: "I mean, youre a fairly successful CEO, you're smart and probably rich, and you have model good looks. I'm sure you wouldn't have trouble finding someone in your...class that would attend events with you." After taking a sip of your coldening tea, you shrugged nonchalantly. "Just saying..." you smiled.

Jungkook chuckled a bit as he leaned back in his seat, studying you for a moment. "My class? You mean starving models, idols, and other business women who all act dumb and fall at my feet?" he laughed softly again. "Lets just say that I was feeling generous. I wanted to help someone who needed the money, and I wanted something...new. Normal."

"Normal, as in myself?" you asked, making the man chuckle again. "Mhm, like you. You're not swooning everytime I smile at you. You don't seem to care about my money, even though you answered the ad." He sipped his coffee again, "Which leads me to my next question, why did you answer the ad?" The question took you by surprise, although you should have expected it with something like this.

"Well, I'm a broke college student and I'm severely in debt. Theres not much else to it." You shrugged simply, watching his facial expressions. You didn't fail to notice the slight clench of his jaw. How sharp and defined it was. This man was definitely fine as fuck. and here you were, sitting across from him. In the oddest of situations.

"I see." he nodded. "well, then I'm happy you answered the ad. Not just because you need the money, but because you weren't playing with me and that you seem surprisingly honest." He chuckled. "That and you are extremely beautiful." He hummed. The compliment caught you offguard as you blushed heavily, nearly choking on your drink as you wiped your mouth with a napkin. "I- Thank you..." you breathed, laughing a bit.

Jungkook just smiled at you, drinking his coffee quietly as he stared out the window. The clocks hands slowly ticking as it neard half past noon. You needed to go soon, one of your classes was coming up. "So." Jungkook started again, looking back at you easily, drumming his fingers against his cup. "I suppose we should go over the events of the week before I have to go." He chuckled, pulling out a folded piece of paper and sliding it towards you. You unfolded it gently, reading over the written out itinerary. It was fairly simple:

*Monday - Dinner with friends

*Tuesday - Photoshoot for magazine

*Wednesday - Business meeting followed by dinner

*Thursday - Visiting sister companies

*Friday - Office Gala

Your head nodded at the words printed out on the sheet, before you looked back up at him. "So we're doing this?" You ask softly, making the businessman chuckle. "Of course we are. You're a very bright woman. You'll do well." He hummed approvingly, sitting up straight now. "And ofcourse I'll pay you every night for your company. A glorified escort if you will, although I hope we can become more like friends."

You nodded, smiling as you tucked the paper away into your purse before you stood up. "Alright. Then I guess I'll see you tomorrow Jungkook." You breathed, holding out your hand for him to take. The mans hand sliding into your gently, the rough calluses on his palm scraping against yours slightly. "Tomorrow. Oh, and don't worry about paying. I'll cover it." he grinned, winking playfully before he leaned down and pressed a chaste kiss to the back of your hand, letting go of it after a few moments. You could have sworn your heart stopped and your face turned bright red as you nodded faintly.

"Mhm..yeah. Tomorrow." you agreed, before you grabbed the rest of your things and headed for the door, casting one long glance back at the older gentleman before leaving the quaint cafe and heading back onto the busy city streets. Were you even prepared for this? It sounded like a lot in the end, even as day shifted into night and you were comfortably in bed. Your mind racing. You sighed heavily, letting out a breath as you turned on your side. The upstairs neighbors noises slowly lulling you to sleep, mixed with the faint traffic sounds outside and the A/C blasting into your small room.

Tomorrow would definitely be an interesting one...

------

The week seemed to go by in a big blur. Dinner with Jungkooks friends had went surprisingly well even though you weren't used to the upscale dinners and fancy restaurants. Jungkook had prepped you before hand on everyone's names and had even took you out shopping for a few new clothing items. He had told you that the dress you wore to dinner looked flattering on you. You could have sworn you had caught his eyes wandering over your bare legs a few times during dinner that night.

But in the end, the older man had drove you home in his Mercedes and walked you to your apartment door, kissing your hand again before he left. Everytime he did that, sparks seemed to ignite under your skin.

Tuesday was calmer. You didn't know why Jungkook had wanted your company at a simple photoshoot but it seemed to calm his nerves whenever he'd get a break from the bright flashes of the camera, finding you seated in the same chair all afternoon. You were glad to help him, even though he should be used to this type of publicity. 

Later, as the two of you were walking the city sidewalks, he had said that photoshoots always made him nervous. "What if I had a stain on my tie or my zipper was down?" He had muttered to you, a light pink blush appearing on his aged face. It made you laugh louder than intended, the man shushing you quickly as he fought a chuckle. "Shh...you'll ruin me!" he had whispered, soon joining in your laughter. When he had taken you home that night, he kissed your hand again. "Goodnight sweetheart." He had mumbled softly, before handing you an envelope. 

In the silence and solitude of your apartment, you opened the seal on the envelope, your eyes widening at the cash nestled inside. "Shit..." you had breathed. This man wasn't playing around. This money alone would cover half your bills. Before you went to bed that night, you stuck the payment in a safe place to save it. Maybe by the end of the week you could be living a little easier...

The meeting on Wednesday ran long. Longer than Jungkook intended as you sat in the lobby of his building. The black dress you wore hugging your curves as you sat neatly in a leather chair. You found things to busy yourself though. Like paying your past due bills and talking to a nice security guard. The old man giving you some insight to Jungkooks life.  Apparently the man used to be a famous idol. You didn't really care about that part, but he had mentioned to you in passing that he was very good at karaoke. It made sense now. 

Jungkook had six older "brothers" too, who were also apart of the band. 

"Sorry I'm late." Jungkook breathed as he joined you, his dark eyes looking at the security guard and then you. "What did Jun tell you?" He asked playfully, clearly he knew the man well enough to not get mad at him. The conversation flowed in the car as well, you questioning him endlessly about him being a successful idol and him just laughing and explaining his tattooed arm now. Especially the ones tattooed on his knuckles and hand. 

When he had finished, he smiled at you and finally took in your appearance for tonights dinner. You watched as his eyes darkened slightly, his tongue flicking against the metal of his lip ring. "I like this one more than the last." He nodded, his veined hand moving to rest on the dark fabric covering your thigh. His breathing seemed a bit heavier as he parked his car. "I like it too." you mumbled, blushing a bit as you felt the heat from his palm through your dress. It never went farther than that though. Even through the dinner, Jungkook was nothing short of a gentleman. 

Everything seemed to shift slightly on Thursday though. 

Jungkook had paid you that morning, before he told you that you actually couldn't join him today. For what reason, you didn't know. But when he had shown up at your door that morning to tell you, his eyes were dark and tired looking. Like he had stayed up all night after he dropped you off. He also looked...angry underneath the smile lines. But no matter how much you wanted to comfort him, you remained quiet and just nodded at his words.

You had decided to clean your apartment when he left you. The two of you exchanging quick little messages here and there about the day and how you were doing. To be honest, it was weird being alone now. You were so used to Jungkook being there with you all week and now you felt...alone. You liked having someone there to talk to all the time and to laugh with. You had even told Jungkook this, messaging him more than he had replied back. Sure, you felt bad. What if you were interrupting his meeting? 

But the other side of you missed him a lot. And when your phone chimed an hour later, you didn't hesitate to check. It was Jungkook, but instead of replying to your desperate "I miss you" text, he had simply told you that dinner was canceled tonight. So was he even coming over at all? The question ran through your head more times than you'd care to admit. Instead of sulking like you had been doing though, you replied with a picture of yourself in the dress you were going to wear to tonights dinner. The red velvet garment hugging your thighs and breasts. The neckline dipping down between your cleavage slightly. Sure, it was revealing, and Jungkook hadn't seen it yet, but you liked it a lot. You quickly added a text after the picture was sent: 

"Too bad about dinner. I wanted to wear this for you."

You watched your screen after sending it. 

You watched it deliver.

You watched Jungkook look at it and leave you on read. 

He never answered, even as the hours passed and you had eventually took the dress off and showered for the night. Putting on a pair of sweats and a tank top as you grabbed your phone and flopped down on your old couch. It was about nine at night when frantic knocking sounded at your door. You weren't asleep yet, but now you were hyper aware of the sound as you stalked to your living room. 

When you answered it, you were taken aback by the disarrayed Jungkook at your door. His hair was messy and his tie was loose around his neck. He smelled faintly like whiskey as his eyes met yours. His pupils blown wide enough to cover the color of his irises. Before you could even ask what had happened today, he was on you. The older man moving inside the apartment with you before he closed the door and locked it. His large hands on your hips as he found the nearest wall to back you up against. His breath was heavy as he breathed in the scent of your slightly damp hair, his fingers digging into the gray fabric of your sweats gently. 

"Jungkook- what are you-..." You went to ask softly, your own heart racing as you watched him, his hand coming up to press a slender finger to your lips. "Now, what makes you think...you can just send me a photo like that when I'm in a meeting..." he whispered faintly, pulling away to look down at you. He wasn't drunk, that was evident on how clear his words were. So this...whatever this was, he had planned all the way here.

"I thought you'd like it..." You answered calmly, your eyes meeting his softly. "D-did you like it?" you asked, smiling a bit at him. The man chuckled and moved to press his lips against your cheek, his hands squeezing your hips as he tugged you closer to him. "Fuck yes." he growled lowly. "It made me want to leave my meeting so I could drive over here and rip it off with my teeth..." 

The suggestion in his tone almost made your knees buckle as a slight whimper left your lips. How long had it been since someone had talked to you like that? It felt like forever. But this...coming from an older man? It made your stomach do flips as you bit your lip. "O-oh yeah?" you asked shakily, your hand resting against his chest. Jungkook only nodded as his lips moved to kiss and suck lightly against your neck and jaw. His hands sliding to cup your backside and pull you closer against him. It was evident that he was hard in his slacks. But this...wasn't something that had been mentioned before. Sure, there had been light touches and flirting...but never this extreme. 

"Jungkook..." you started, your breaths heavier than they were before as you pushed against him slightly. The older man paused in his onslaught of kisses, pulling away at your pushes to look down at you. "I-i'm sorry. I know that the ad said no sexual favors. That's not what I intended..." he blushed slightly. He looked so boyish as he apologized, but you just shook your head slightly. "I-its okay...I just didn't expect it." you answered, "I just missed you." 

At those words, a cute bunny grin appeared on his face. "Missed me, hm?" he teased, his hands still on your ass as he studied your face. He was quiet for a long moment as he studied your lightly flushed cheeks and your dilated pupils. One of Jungkooks hands left your ass to come up and cup your cheek, his thumb brushing against the rosy flesh. The two of you were practically sharing every breath now. "Do you want me to leave?" he whispered. "Just say the words and I'll go." He mumbled against your lips. Your head swam as you were overwhelmed by the full force of him. The smell of an old cologne wafting off of his disheveled suit coat. The look was definitely affecting you, that and his hands on your body. 

Jungkook opened his mouth to speak but he didn't get a chance as your lips met his. The two of you working in a tandem as his tongue slid past your lips. Eliciting soft groans from you as your arms reached up to wrap around the mans neck, your fingers twining in the strands of hair at the nape of Jungkooks neck. When he pulled away, he smirked down at you and your slightly swollen lips. His tongue darting out to lick his own lips. "I've been thinking about doing that all week." he chuckled. "but...I should go now. Let you sleep...hm? Prepare for that party tomorrow night."

                                                                                            -----

And that's how you ended up at this glamorous party, Jungkooks hand secured on your hip as he leaned into you. His breath tickling your ear as he hummed. "Did you hear me?" he asked, a soft laugh leaving the man. It snapped you out of your thoughts, your eyes meeting his as you smiled. "I'm sorry. What did you say?" It made him laugh again as his hands moved to turn you around. Your eyes meeting his dark ones.  "I asked if you were having a nice night?" He smirked playfully, the gray in his hair catching the light from the overhead chandeliers. 

"Oh.", you started, looking around a bit more. To be honest, it was a little overwhelming. All the people and the music. You had gotten to meet some of Jungkooks "brothers". Jimin and tae. That was a definite upside, as the two men were as nice and as teasing as Jungkook. "I guess? This is my first Gala. I have nothing to compare it to." You shrugged, smiling faintly up at the man. His hands tightened on your silk-clad hips then, his mouth meeting your ear as his lips brushed against it. "Maybe not..." He whispered, "maybe we can keep doing this...together." 

His words made you pause. Your eyes widening as you pulled away to look at him. "Keep doing this...Jungkook, what are you talking about? I'm a twenty-two year old college student. I'm not rich or used to all this! I would never fit in here or with your crowd." you whispered frantically, trying to get free from the mans gentle grip on you. He wouldn't budge, his doe eyes staring at you. His lips slightly parted. His tongue played with the piercing in his lip as you waited for a response with baited breath. 

"Come with me." He said suddenly, sliding his hand into your and heading up a grand staircase. It lead to the second floor, people watching from the railings at the party down below. A party that soon grew quiet as the man in front of you led you down halls and walkways. He was eerily quiet as you let him, before he pushed open a door that led to a lavish bedroom. A large bed against the far wall, draped with curtains. Modern furniture everywhere and a view that put any you'd seen to shame. 

"Where are we Jungkook? Why'd you bring me here?" you asked, closing the door behind you. You took a few steps into the room, your hands slack at your sides as you watched the man go over to a liquor cabinet and pour himself a small glass of whiskey. He downed it in one go, before he leaned against the counter he was behind. His dark eyes staring right into your soul. "This is my private room. I pay for it. I come here when I'm stressed or when I want away from my lonely apartment. Jimin owns this entire building." He smirked slightly as he watched your mouth part in surprise. 

"Oh." you muttered, before taking another slow look around. But you could feel the mans eyes on you. Like a predator watching it's prey. " I want to keep doing this." He started then, making you turn around to look at him. "And before you complain...let me say this," He held up a hand, smiling playfully at you. "I like you. A lot. You're different. You're beautiful." he blushed, the man still slightly bashful as he admitted this to you. A hint of the teenager underneath it all showing through. 

"And I know you're not rich. I didn't fail to notice your mail yesterday when I came over. You needed to be my escort for the money and I understand that. You wanted nothing more than the job and the cash that I offered." He shrugged. "I was prepared to pay you your final earning tonight actually, but I wanted to say this first," He paused, gauging your reaction. When you just watched him, listening intently, he continued.

"I want more than this. I want to take you to more than just galas and photoshoots." 'He smiled, taking slow steps towards you now. "I want to take you on dates and to clothing stores." he hummed, before he was in front of you, his hands taking yours gently and holding them. His dark doe eyes meeting your wide ones. "I want to travel the world with you..." he breathed, his thumbs rubbing the back of your hands. 

"I want...you."

The words came crashing down on you. Your heart racing as you stared at him in shock and disbelief. This man...wanted you? A rich, successful, older CEO wanted a normal girl from some no name town? You almost couldn't believe it. And you weren't surprised when you found yourself nodding at his words. With shaking hands you reached up and cupped his face between them. You had denied yourself since that night at dinner when he had kept looking at you. Had denied what happened between the two of you yesterday. You were done not giving in to what your heart and body clearly wanted. 

"I want you too Jungkook." You whispered, your lips meeting his in a rush of courage and passion. Only a second passed before you felt him kissing you back, his tongue asking for entrance as it slid across your lower lip. Jungkooks hands moved and wrapped around you then, his veiny hands grasping your ass and giving a playful squeeze as you opened up for him. The sound of your kissing and shared breaths the only noise in the room. 

When you moaned against his lips is when both your resolves snapped. The man easily lifting you up, your legs wrapping around his waist as he carried you over to the large bed. He set you down easily before he pulled away, his eyes on you as he stepped back and pulled his tie free. Jungkook taking his time as he slowly untucked his shirt, unbuttoning it and letting it fall to the floor. A low chuckle left him at your awed expression. This man was so fine, it had to be criminal. His tattoo ended at his shoulder, and his body was toned. Like desire incarnate. 

"Fuck." you whispered, feeling your core clench and ache slightly. Maybe it had been awhile since you've done anything with a man. Your body felt like it was on fire. Jungkook just chuckled at the heat behind your single word, the outline of his erection pressed against his black slacks. He was big, and you wondered what it would feel like when he was inside you. Stretching you open so you could take all of him. Just the thought made you shiver, your legs pressing together under your dress. He took note of that, his pupils dark as he smirked. The man lowering to the ground in front of you, resting on his knees. "What's wrong babygirl?" He breathed, one of his larger hands sliding under your dress and up the bare flesh of your leg. 

The name alone caused you to whimper with desperation. Fuck, hearing that from an older man had definitely awoken something within you. Jungkook smirked at your silence as his hand only slid higher. He stopped when his fingers brushed your inner thigh. "Do you want me to?" he breathed heavily, waiting for your response. You looked down at him then, biting your lip as your legs parted on pure instinct. "Want you to what?" you asked playfully, your chest rising and falling quickly. 

Jungkook raised an eyebrow as he looked at you, licking his lips again as his hand only inched higher. You both clearly wanted this. "Do you want me to show you how a real man pleasures a cunt like yours?" he grinned, his fingers skimming the lace of your underwear. A gasp left you as you shivered, nodding quickly at his devilish words. At this point you let him do anything he wanted. 

That was all Jungkook needed as he slid your dress up your legs, bunching the material at your waist as his eyes ate up the image before him. Your black lace panties already ruined with an obvious wetness. He chuckled slightly as he ran a skilled finger over your covered slit, his eyes flicking up to meet yours. "See? Already ruined for me,hm?" he licked his lips. He gently moved to pull your underwear to the side, his other hand grasping your hip gently as you leaned back on your arms to watch him. Jungkook nearly groaned at the sight of your aching clit, begging for attentipn as he leaned up and kissed along your thighs. You were already trembling with need, and you were afraid that you would come just from this alone. 

The older man kissed and sucked along your smooth skin, before he slowly slid his skilled tongue up your slit and though your folds. His lips sealing around your pulsing clit. The moan that left you was loud and sudden, your hips bucking up against his wanting mouth. His hand gently held you down as he feasted on you like a man starved. His lips and tongue pleasuring you until you were a mess of cries and moans. Your hands grasping at the salt and pepper strands of his hair. "J...Jungkook-" you whined. "I'm going to cum if you keep doing that- please" 

Jungkook pulled away then, letting you catch your breath as he stared at you. His lips and chin drenched with your arousal. His tongue flicking his lip ring as he stared at you. "I know baby...I could tell." he smiled, before he stood up and unbuckled his belt. His slacks sliding down his waist, revealing black Calvin Klein boxers. His hardened erection straining against the material as he climbed onto the bed, hovering over your disheveled form. "I want to finish together." He whispered, leaning down to nip at your earlobe. His skilled mouth moving to capture your lips. The taste of yourself on his lips was enough to send you reeling, your back arching up into him so he could reach under you and unzip the dress you wore. 

Once that was done, he helped you shimmy out of it, the man throwing the pile of red silk onto the floor. Aside from your underwear being halfway down your full thighs, you were naked under him. Nipples perfectly peaked against the slight chill in the air. Jungkook stared down at you then, one of his hands coming up to roll and pinch one of them, causing you to moan and whine for him. "Please-" you begged quietly. Jungkook looked at you, smirking playfully as his other hand left you and tugged down his boxers. His considerable length slapping against his toned stomach. Precum beading at the tip already. It made you hungry. It made your pussy even wetter than it already was. 

"Please what, baby?" he whispered,pecking your lips. A hand leaving your breast and moving to cup your cheek. His other hand slowly stroking his cock. You watched him, stomach clenching as your legs parted for him to ease between. "Please fuck me." you begged quietly, blushing faintly as you stared at him. 

Jungkook nodded, smiling slightly before he kissed you. His hand around his cock slowly guiding him against you. His tip spreading your folds apart before he was slowly inching inside of you. His lips cut off the garbled moan that left you, your hands tangling in his hair tightly after you wrapped your legs around him. Once he had given you time to get a feel of him, he started pushing more. Until he completely bottomed out, filling you to the brim with himself as he slowly started thrusting. 

The moans that left the both of you were long and loud when he started moving against you. Sweat beading at his temple as he leaned down to kiss you again. His kiss gentle as his hips picked up a steady rythym. Your legs only tightened further around him as he did, pulling away to cry out in ecstacy. He felt so good against you. The warmth, the shared breaths, the absolute heavenly feel of him inside you made your toes curl as you felt that long overdue lick of pleasure slide down your spine and pool in your stomach. 

Jungkook knew it too. Could feel the way your walls clenched and tightened around him the fatser and harder his thrusts became. He was also chasing his own release, but he wanted to watch as the pleasure crossed your face. Wanted to see you turn to mush underneath him as he contimued to use you to reach his own orgasm. "Thats it baby...just a little more for me.." he whispered against your cheek, his nose skimming the rosy pink skin. "You're being so good...you feel so perfect around me." The praise went straight to your head as you turned his face towards you, lips meeting his in a sloppy kiss as you crumbled around him. Your hips met his slowing thrusts, riding out your orgasm. Moans and whined falling from your reddened lips as you looked up at him with hooded eyes. 

Jungkooks thrusts were getting slopppier by the second as he guided you through your climax, his cock aching for its own release. The mans hands propping him up above you slightly, tattooed hand dug into the blanket under you as his eyes raked over your sweaty, pleasure-stricken features. Soft moans still left your lips at his weakening thrusts, your poor cunt sensitive after the onslaught he was currently trying to end. Your hands tangling back in his hair as you kissed him. 

It wasn't long before Jungkooks hips pushed for the final time, making sure he was securely all the way inside you before he let his orgasm take him. His cock spurting out rope after rope of cum inside you. Painting your insides in white as he slowed, eventually stopping. Your thighs were sticky with sweat and release as it trickled out of you around him. A satisfied smile plastered your face as Jungkook fell on top of you, burying his face in your neck as he peppered your heated skin with kisses. 

The two of you layed there for what seemed like forever, until the older man rolled off of you, sliding out of you gently before he pulled you against his chest. Jungkook smoothed your hair back as he reached down and pulled a blanket over the both of you, a smile on his face as he kissed your forehead. You were both too tired to clean up. But you had all the time in the world with him now. Jungkook sighed in contentment. "Thank you." he whispered softly as the two of you lay there. 

You turned on your side slowly, already feeling the ache between your legs. You would worry about that tomorrow. " For what?" you asked sleepily, playing with a strand of his hair. Jungkook hummed and wrapped an arm around you, tugging you even closer to him. "For playing the part." He breathed against your hair, making you blush and laugh slightly. You only nodded, pressing a kiss against his cheek. "Starting tomorrow...I don't think I want to play a part anymore." Jungkook just smiled at your words, his heart felt full as he nodded, letting you doze off against him. 

What would the next few weeks entail? The next few years? 

But he wouldn't worry about that now. All he wanted now was to be close to you. To never let you go. So he wouldn't.

Not until you ordered him away.

[prettieinpink]

2024 WRAPPED⋆˚ 𝜗𝜚˚⋆

₊˚⊹♡TOP LESSONS LEARNT 

Missing out gives you progress on your goals. So many times this year, I didn’t do things that I usually would’ve loved to do to make and maintain progress on my

goals. Simple things like cancelling plans, buying certain things and any other short-term pleasures. Allowing myself to overcome FOMO, and in return, I saw great progress in my goals. 

People hating you has nothing to do with you. I dislike a lot of things because it's my personal preference. Someone who decides to hate you is a matter of their preference. However, if they choose to show that hatred to you, it's a matter of projection. People will project onto you as a way to cope with their own life, cause they can’t deal with their own. 

Stop letting everything control you. Truly, you’re held back from nothing in life. Your circumstances, identity, environment and more can only hold you back so far. At one point, you’ve gotta start acting and stop blaming everything around you on why you can’t. This one… is still in progress for me. I do feel like my parents are a major factor in me being held back, but deeper down, I also feel that it's an excuse to not work up to my potential. 

Trying to fit in is fruitless. I wear and listen to what I want. I decide what kind of content I want to consume, and what food I want to eat. This generation is notorious for tearing down anyone who doesn’t fit in a cookie cutter. Allowing your authenticity to shine through, will guide those who are meant for you, to you!

All problems are temporary. This one does not apply to everything, but it applies to a lot of things. Your issues will not last forever, so don’t let it leave a permanent mark on you. Don’t let your situation deter you from your goals.

₊˚⊹♡ACHIEVEMENTS 

It's small, but I feel like I’ve created my room to be fully intentional for me. While it still can be improved, my room is much better in terms of clutter and decor compared to 2023. 

Consistent practicing soft social skills like keeping up small chats, giving compliments and handling disagreements gracefully. I ended the year with all B’s! Last semester was a bit of a flunk for me, but I managed to pull it up for the end of the year. 

Saved like 500$ for purchasing things off my wishlist. 

Read like 12ish books for 2024. Would’ve loved to read more, but I was in a reading slump and also didn’t have enough time to go out to my local library to borrow any books. 

₊˚⊹♡HABITS / RITUALS 

In bed by 9 pm, up by 6 am. Sleeping early has made me feel a lot more energised in the mornings, and I find that it's easier to get out of bed and continue with my routine. The later I slept will more I felt sluggish for the next day + waking up earlier hay motivated me to stay on top of my routines. 

Daily walks after school. It gets my steps in, but it's a nice way to debrief after school and regather myself before heading straight into studying. I sometimes do walk home, and it's great to plug in my earphones and just not think. 

Journaling. I preach it for a reason, as journaling helps plenty. It can help you to shift your mindset beliefs, identify self-sabotaging behaviours, allow us to truly reflect on who we are and see progress each day in our lives. 

Lighting candles more frequently. It's such a little habit, but it brings me so much joy. Usually, they’re just collecting dust as decor however when I started to use them, I loved the whole experience. The smell and the small warmth that it brings are just perfect for the ambience. 

Curating my social media. I have an absolute maximum of 5 hours per day, but I still want those 5 hours to count for something. I’ve redownloaded TikTok earlier this year, and I think it’s a great platform for looking for advice and inspiration. Creating a feed that works for you instead of the other way around, will definitely change how it influences you. 

Having alone time in the morning and at night. I need this time to myself to slow myself down and regather my thoughts and it's just what I look forward to, to get through the day. I usually do whatever I like in this time slot, on the condition that I am completely by myself, free from any tasks or distractions. 

Cleaning regularly. When I did a deep clean last year, it would just be vacuuming my room and wiping down all visible surfaces. That is good, but there’s a lot more to clean than you realise. One major thing that we forget to clean (yet is probably the dirtiest) is our devices. Wipe down all screens every single day!

₊˚⊹♡BEAUTY / FASHION TIPS

Turn down the toilet seat when you flush. The amount of times I’ve been in public toilets and flushed with the lid up is outrageous, and I just can’t believe that last year I didn’t even consider the bacteria that would fly up on my clothes or even my face. Not a major skincare tip, however, er I think this would affect it. 

Know your undertone. I would only use undertones to know what kind of jewellery fits me, but it goes way beyond that. Before I start, I would like to say, don’t buy any more clothes or makeup just because they don’t fit your undertone. If you like your confidence will override any undertone clash. I used to walk around with really yellow makeup, and the difference when I got a foundation that had more of a golden undertone was like day and night. The same applies to your clothes. Warmer clothes will complement me, becausI’m’m warm-toned. So, I tend to stay away from cooler tones. I don’t use colour seasons, Is anyone wondering? 

Stick to a palette that you like. Last year, I wasted so much money trying to experiment with new colours in my clothes and makeup, just to end up hating it. It’s also a bad consumerist habit, to buy things for your fantasy self. So today, I only buy clothes it's the colours I like and I only purchase makeup if its shades fit me. I’m not saying buy anything new, but keep it to a minimum to reduce waste and save your money for the things that you like. 

Avoid fashion inspiration with faces. Highly attractive people can pull off anything, quite literally. Their face can influence subconsciously them ly to love the outfit, even if the outfit is ‘bad’. So, when saving pictures from Pinterest, TikTok or magazines, avoid any outfits that show their face. I said avoid it as sometimes you just really like an outfit and you know it's nothing to do with their face, which is okay. 

₊˚⊹♡YOUTUBERS

JIlLZ GUERIN - Focuses on feminine energy, lifestyle and intellectual habits. I recommend her as many of her videos are new and fresh perspectives.

SANDY DIANA BANG - Mostly productive vlogs that inspire and motivate, with a sprinkle of wellness, health and beauty content. Her channel and vibes are so aesthetic too! 

ROSIE GRAHAM & LIDIA MERA - Both are fitness influencers that focus on pilates. Their workouts are so good that they always leave me sweating and strained (which is good!! lmao). If one of your goals for 2025 was to start working out, I would use their videos. 

THANK YOU BUBU - Another fitness channel that is one of my time faves, and they have a variety of exercises that target abs, glutes, legs and arms. Another channel I would recommend if I was starting to exercise again. 

MINA LE - She does research and creates video essays on various topics, which many videos I feel are relevant in current times. She’s great if you want to expand and explore new perspectives. 

HALIEY GAMBA - She’s for a more matured audience, but she’s such a hidden gem. All of her advice ly new things, not just the same things that have been rinsed and repeated. 

KELLY GOOCH - She’s a beauYouTuberber who mainly discusses the beauty industry and its products while recommending some. She’s one of the only beauty influencers who I will listen to, as I feel like her opinions aren’t constantly swayed by sponsorships or promotions. Even then I would still take any beauty opinions and advice with two cents.

ELLE CHU - A smaller, but underrated beauty influencer. She discusses a lot of beauty products whether they’re worth it, overhyped or overpriced. She does sometimes talk about the beauty industry, but those videos are infrequent. 

₊˚⊹♡BOOKS 

(I have read all of them libby- a reading app).

NJUTA by NIKI BRANTMARK. All about the Swedish art of enjoying the present. If you feel like you have a simple and unexciting life, I recommend you read this.

SPARK JOY by Marie Kondo. A popular decluttering book that uses the KonMari method that emphasises items that you want to keep, instead of focusing on what you want to get rid of.

THE HEALTHY MIND TOOLKIT by Dr Alice Boyes. This is the ultimate guide of mindset shifts to target self-sabotaging or destructive beliefs and gives strategies to overcome them.

MINDFULLNESS ON THE GO by Jan Chozen Bays. A collection of little mindfulness practices you can do almost anywhere, almost anytime. 

MY WISHES FOR 2025

To join any club at this point. It's hard for me to do anything outside of the house with my parents' schedules, and I do feel like it has eaten at my social life and the experiences, lessons etc I would gain. At first, I originally wanted to join so it's something I could put on my university application, however, I’m entering year 10 with absolutely no extracurriculars since year 7. (for anyone not down under, I'm talking about high school grades.) 

Expanding my social circle. I feel like I don’t have a secondary community outside of school, and it's definitely what can amplify my slumps or depression without having that one person I can talk to freely, without the worry of school. I feel like I’m making no sense here. 

Moving anywhere. I want to move schools, cities, countries, or whatever. Being in the same school since year 2 (elementary) has taken a toll on me. 

A million dollars. Very unrealistic, but I still want it! I feel like money is the only thing that can actively change my life at this point. 

thats it for this post! I encourage anyone else to do their own wrapped and tag me!

[spacelazarwolf]

Hey there! I’ve really appreciated your posts and perspective over this past month, I’m having a hard time (as so many Jews are) and your voice helps.

I’m hoping you can help me with reliable resources. A friend of mine condemned the Hamas attacks etc (as they should, to my relief) but is under the impression that Israeli govt is doing genocide to the Palestinians. I’ve no idea how to approach that to verify (or not), I don’t even know where to start looking. Do you have any suggestions?

Thank you.

thanks! this is a really tough question, but i'm going to do my best to break it down. also if anyone's thinking of clowning on this post without reading it, inb4 "omg ur denying genocide!!!!!!" bc this post is literally outlining, in detail, all the ways the israeli government is, by definition, committing genocide.

this is really long, just a heads up.

a big frustration i have with a lot of progressive or leftist spaces is the tendency to throw around words like genocide without being able to define the term or properly apply it to the situation in question. this isn't just a semantics issue. if all you're doing is repeating the buzzwords you've heard on social media, your "activism" is going to be less than useless. it is crucial that if you are going to talk about the current genocide in gaza, you must be able to define exactly what a genocide is and how it applies to what's happening in gaza.

i'm paraphrasing from this article by the united nations. the word "genocide" was coined in 1944 by raphael lemkin in his book "axis rule in occupied europe." it was developed partly in response to the shoah, but also to previous instances of what we would now define as genocide. it was recognized as a crime under international law in 1946, and codified as an independent crime in the 1948 convention on the prevention and punishment of the crime of genocide.

the definition of genocide

(from article II of the convention on the prevention and punishment of the crime of genocide):

in the present convention, genocide means any of the following acts committed with intent to destroy, in whole or in part, a national, ethnical, racial or religious group, as such:

a. killing members of the group; b. causing serious bodily or mental harm to members of the group; c. deliberately inflicting on the group conditions of life calculated to bring about its physical destruction in whole or in part; d. imposing measures intended to prevent births within the group; e. forcibly transferring children of the group to another group.

the 10 stages of genocide

a model created by gregory stanton, the founding president of genocide watch

classification - people are divided into "them and us"

symbolization - when combined with hatred, symbols may be forced upon unwilling members of pariah groups.

discrimination - law or cultural power excludes groups from full civil rights: segregation or apartheid laws, denial of voting rights.

dehumanization - one group denies the humanity of the other group. memmbers of it are equated with animals, vermin, insects, or diseases.

organization - genocide is always organized... special army units or militias are often trained and armed...

polarization - extremists drive the groups apart... leaders are arrested and murdered... laws erode fundamental civil rights and liberties.

preparation - mass killing is planned. victims are identified and sepaarated because of their ethnic or religious identity.

persecution - expropriation, forced displacement, ghettos.

extermination - it is 'extermination' to the killers because they do not believe their victims to be fully human.

denial - the perpatrators... deny that they committed any crimes.

application to the crisis in gaza

to start with the first definition from the united nations:

a. killing members of the group - YES

the death toll in gaza has risen above 8,000 according to the associated press. as far as i know, as of writing this post, there has been no ceasefire so the death toll will continue to rise.

b. causing serious bodily or mental harm to members of the group - YES

over 20,000 people in gaza have been injured, and gazans - particularly children - suffer incredibly high rates of ptsd.

c. deliberately inflicting on the group conditions of life calculated to bring about its physical destruction in whole or in part - YES

the israeli blockade of gaza has had devastating consequences for gazans. they are running out of food, water, fuel, and medicine, and this is costing additional lives.

d. imposing measures intended to prevent births within the group - unclear but leaning toward YES

whether or not it is the explicit goal, the current bombardment of gaza has put the lives of 50,000+ pregnant women in gaza at risk, along with their babies. babies who need incubators are also in danger as generators begin to run out of fuel.

e. forcibly transferring children of the group to another group - as far as i am aware, NO

according to the us embassy in israel, the palestinian authority ministry of social development is the only authorized entity regarding adoption of palestinian children. this doesn't mean it isn't happening, it just means i was not able to find any credible sources.

the 10 stages of genocide

classification - YES there is a long history in israel of othering palestinians, both socially/culturally and legally. former israeli minister of interior and minister of justice ayelet shaked shared a racist quote from netanyahu's former chief of staff explicitly framing palestinians as "the enemy."

symbolization - not yet there are no overt symbols palestinians, even within israel, are required to wear to outwardly identify themselves, but there are identifying features on their ids. in fact, the opposite has been happening, with far right members of the israeli government attempting to pass legislation making it illegal to publicly display palestinian flags.

discrimination - YES there is, again, a long history of discrimination against palestinians within and by the state of israel. it is difficult for palestinians from the west bank or gaza to gain status in israel, israeli work permits are used as a form of control, and often forcibly separate palestinian families.

dehumanization - YES former israeli deputy minister of defense eli ben dahan said of palestinians, "to me they are like animals, they aren't human."

organization - YES israel is currently carrying out an organized and brutal attack on gaza.

polarization - YES from extremist groups like hamas, to the corruption in the likud party in israel, there are very clear signs of extreme polarization. israel's siege against gaza has caused polarization across the entire globe.

preparation - YES gazans in particular are unable to leave gaza without a permit, and now with the blockade from both israel and egypt they are essentially trapped.

persecution - YES gaza in particular could absolutely be likened to a ghetto. as stated above, (in "usual" circumstances) they are unable to leave without a permit, and since hamas took control it is nearly impossible to get an israeli work permit.

extermination - GETTING THERE if the siege continues and gazans are unable to get out of gaza, there will be catastrophic casualties.

denial - YES i often hear that "israel has a right to defend itself" but i cannot possibly find a way to frame the current siege as "self defense."

so in conclusion, israel is - by multiple definitions - committing genocide against gazans. and it's very important to be able to identify specifics, especially if you are planning on having discussions about it. and i've said it in the past, but if you are not directly affected by what's happening - palestinians in particular, but israeli citizens and jews and muslims in the diaspora are also getting hit hard - it is IMPERATIVE that you are able to talk about this with a level head. escalating tensions and pushing away potential allies is only going to make things worse. find common ground, form connections, and then have a productive discussion.

[bellestarot]

Pick a Pile

What's Next in Life?💐

♡ Take your time to choose

︵‿︵‿︵ʚĭɞ‿︵‿︵‿

Pile I

You're about to level up emotionally. I see you moving from getting hurt easily to someone who can handle emotions in a better way. Maybe it was hard for you in the past, but I see some major emotional glow-ups happening.

You're also going to get braver. Life's going to throw some challenges your way that'll help you grow.

Your adventurous side is coming out to play. You'll be at peace exploring and discovering more about yourself. I see you traveling and visiting new places, but you're doing it for yourself, not for anyone else.

You'll be surrounded by awesome people. True and genuine friendships are on their way to you in the next chapter of your life. If you had trouble with friends before, that’s about to change. Great people are coming, and the universe has your back.

You’ve been through a lot, but now you can finally trust in the situation and these new friends. I see so much happiness coming your way!

Pile II

I see success and happiness in something you’ve put a lot of work and effort into for a long time. This could be related to academics, work, or something personal. You’ve worked really hard, staying up late, feeling anxious and tired, but you kept pushing through. There were many moments when you thought about giving up, but you didn’t. Now, I see a lot of abundance coming your way in the next chapters of your life.

People will be congratulating you and happy for you because you achieved what you wanted.

I also see some family issues. This won't apply to everyone who chose Pile 2, but some of you might relate to what I’m saying. Maybe some of you have issues with your mom or a strong female figure in the family.

There might be problems related to money or how money is used in the family, causing feelings of sadness. These are more emotional issues rather than health-related ones.

I see some disappointment with the family in certain areas. However, any conflict you might have with a female figure in the family will get resolved. Having this kind of relationship can hurt a lot, but I see it ending and getting better. So, for some of you, this might be a message of support and positivity regarding a connection that's not going well right now, and I can say it will definitely improve in the next chapters.

Pile III

I see you getting savvier about other people. In the past, you might have been too nice, always wanting to help others, but when you needed help, no one was there for you. I see you starting to notice this around you and saying, "No, I don’t want that for myself." You’re becoming smarter about what you share with others and what you post online.

You’ll start realizing that everything is energy and that sometimes people don’t have good vibes or thoughts for you. This will lead you to protect your energy more.

You’re going to become very spiritual. (You’re already spiritual since you’re reading tarot), but I see you diving even deeper. You’ll get more interested in this world, studying more, listening to others, and connecting more with nature.

This will bring you closer to your truth and who you are, and I see that’s what you’re looking for—getting to know yourself better, discovering more about you, praying, and protecting yourself. I see you becoming a very spiritual person in the next chapters of your life.

You used to listen more than you spoke, but now I see you speaking up, sharing your opinions. There might have been some hesitation, wondering if people will like what you say or if it makes sense. But I see you finding the courage to express yourself and your thoughts. You’re super smart and interested in things that others might not be paying attention to.

I see you getting into these topics and being able to talk about them in an engaging and well-expressed way.

[kurokawaia]

❛ RUN, BABY. RUN ❜

Yandere! Sanzu Haruchiyo X Fem!Reader

WC; 4k+ | !MDNI! 18+ | TW/CW :: OVERALL WARNINGS Yandere themes dark content, inexperienced!reader, timid!shy!reader, pet names 'baby' 'doll' + more, drugs (sanzu's part), alcohol, clubs, age gap -> reader is implied to be around 20-22, reader is described to be shorter than Sanzu, smut, nsfw, piv, no protection, begging, rough sex? missionary, oral -> female receiving, male receiving, doggy, marking, possessive, possession, restriction, kidnapping?, biting? eventual predator play, based on the song runrunrun by dutch melrose + more

⋆·˚ ༘ *𝒮𝒴𝒩𝒪𝒫𝒮𝐼𝒮 :: meeting Sanzu in that club and accepting that one offer to dance with him, that was when you should've said no, then maybe, you wouldn't be in this situation you are in now.

HONEY'S A/NOTE :: not as dark as i wanted it to be but ill edit it later to make it rlly dark for all you dark romance girlies!!

m.list | tokyo revengers m.list - PART 1 / PART 2

Sanzu watches you and he can feel his heart thumping faster looking at your sweet, innocent face. He can't wait to ruin you. "Impressed?" he asks, though he most definitely knows the answer. Nodding your head. "It's... incredible."

He hums in approval, his arm still wrapped around your waist as he pulls you inside. The elevator ride up to the penthouse is quick, just a little too quick before you know it, the doors slide open into an open, plan sprawl that's all clean lines, dark wood, and floor-to-ceiling windows that look out onto the city below. The view's breathtaking but your attention is quickly pulled back to Sanzu. A ding and then the door closes behind you two, leaving just the two of you.

You wonder what he did for work, this penthouse looks really expensive... You couldn't even fathom what his job is because his hair colour, hairstyle, and how many piercings he has would make it hard for him to find a job, would it not?

All of a sudden, your back is flush against the wall next to the elevator, Sanzu pinning your arms beside your head, his hands gripped tight around your wrists. And then, his lips brush against yours. It's a soft gentle peck before his tongue pushes past your lips and you gasp.

You melt into him as you kiss him back. His lips move slowly against yours, almost cherishing every moment, every touch. But even through the sweetness, you can feel it, the hunger simmering just beneath the surface. His hands grip your waist a little tighter, his breathing hitched as he deepens the kiss. Sanzu leans backward just a fraction, his forehead against yours as he takes a breath. "You're something else," he says in a whisper. His fingers brush a strand of hair off your face before trailing down your neck. For a second, you really think that's all it's going to be- just soft kisses and touching. Then, though, his hand slides to the back of your neck, and he pulls you in again, his lips capturing yours with more intensity this time. 

There's still a sweetness to it, but he's clearly been holding back. His kiss grows urgent, insistent, as if he is losing control of the restraint that he has been desperately trying to apply. Your back presses against the cool wall as he cages you in, the slow and deliberate touch of his hands exploring your body. You feel the heat radiate off him, the way his breathing gets heavier, his body pressing closer still against yours. 

As his lips trail down your neck, sending shivers coursing through your body, you can't help but want to see what happens when that control finally slips as he picks you up, takes you to his room and throws you onto his bed. Before you knew it he was on top of you, white shirt unbuttoned, pink and purple dress pants loosely on his hips

He was distracting your sight, making sure that your eyes were solely focused on his own. Sanzu is making sure that your innocent, pretty doe eyes don't look to his bedside table, let alone how the floor looked on the right side. Drugs and empty alcohol bottles were scattered everywhere.

Bottles on the floor, pills and cocaine on the bedside table.

Not to mention the discarded handguns on the floor, he didn't know how many were there but he didn't want you to lay your eyes upon them. Sanzu just hopes that after this you don't decide to go snooping around because if you did you'd find a lot more things that a normal person should not possess. 

He will make sure you stay oblivious. 

You're his now.

A whimper falls past your lips, and Sanzu is on the verge of going absolutely feral and manic. You sound so pure. He wants to break you slowly, so desperately, but he can't. Sanzu wants to do it now. Your arms push together and your breasts push together as your hands grip his unbuttoned shirt, mounds on the verge of spilling out your mini dress. 

Sanzu lets a free hand trail lower, his first and second fingers hooking under your strapless dress, pulling the top down your chest revealing your plain black strapless bra. Pulling away from the kiss, Sanzu almost loses it, your breasts are beautiful (he can't wait to mark them up, is what he really means).

Your back is still arched from the heated kiss, Sanzu moves down, placing soft, gentle kisses down your jaw to your collarbone, slowly, leaving red marks in their wake. During this, Sanzu unclips your bra with one skilled hand, slender fingers unclipping the clasp.

A gasp leaves your lips, your nails on the verge of breaking the expensive cotton blend. "W-Wait..." you stutter out quietly, and you were surprised that he could even hear you by the way his lips left your neck, his green iris gazing deeply into yours.

A deep hum reverberates in his throat, causing you to nibble on your bottom lip. "What you need, Doll?" he says low against your skin and you let out a sigh at how warm the contact is.

"I haven't..." You began slowly before stopping yourself and Sanzu's eyes widened. He knew you were innocent but he was about to lose it if you were a virgin.

"Done anything like this in a while..." you continue and Sanzu sighs in relief mentally. 

Thank fuck you weren't a virgin (he didn't want to break you too much... but he would've loved for you to be his from the very beginning) Sanzu would just have to make sure that you don't think about anyone but him, making sure you forget about any of your past fucks.

"You don't have to worry, doll," he murmurs agasint your neck before trailing kisses down your stomach, sucking longer on the skin exposed above your underwear and you shiver under his touch, a hand entangling within his pink locks. "You tell me when to stop."

A shaky breath leaves your mouth. "Okay," you whimper, biting on your bottom lip as you look down to see your thighs already pulled over Sanzu's shoulders.

Your head was thrown back against the pillow so suddenly that Sanzu's nose bumped agasint your covered clit. A whimper leaves your lips, thighs tightening around his head before veiny hands spread them far apart, and your back arched, you had nowhere to go.

"F-Fuck," you whimper out.

A whimper leaves your mouth when he places a kiss on your clit and your thighs clench around his head. You attempt to arch away from the overwhelming sensation but Sanzu's grip keeps you in place. A satisfied sigh seeps through him into your folds as a mewl from your full lips.

He pulls your underwear to the side, licking a long stripe up your folds and you moan, your back arching and your cunt pressing further into his face which he relished in. Sanzu moans into your folds, the vibrations reverberating throughout your cunt and you tremble.

His tongue climbs up from your wet hole to your clit while you let out a moan. Your thighs try to  tighten around his head but couldn't as a result of his constriction, and as you grind down on his face, a moan echoes through your clit. Your lips were filled with chants of his name, and he relished every moment of it.

"Haru... f-feels s' good," you moan, tears welling in your lash line, he was making you feel so good.

"I've got you, doll," Sanzu says, making sure to relish in your taste, wanting to etch the flavour in his brain.

When you feel a finger push past your closing walls, your eyes expand, and you cry with delight. It felt so fantastic that you never wanted it to finish, even though you thought you would break because of how much pleasure was crossing through your veins.

His finger pressed up against that soft spot inside your walls. Sanzu was slow with his pace as he curled his fingers every time he entered your cunt, along with sucking and licking at your puffy, sensitive clit.

"You're taking it so well..." Sanzu moans against you, refusing to rut his hips into the mattress.

He wants to break you.

He's being to nice, he can't take it any longer.

A moan arouses from you and your hips grind themselves onto his face. He let you for once have some sort of control over the situation, and he decided that if you came quicker he'll let you do it more often. "That's it," he praised.

His motions become more rapid and needy as you cry his name through broken letters, and the one hold he held on your leg tightens. Your stomach coil tightened, and your fingers wrapped around his locks to stop him from moving and make him sigh deeper into your folds.

The only thing the groans did was push you over the edge, and when he placed his tongue firmly against your clit, a quiet scream from your lips. Your stomach coil unwound, soaking his face completely.

He slowly removed his fingers from your drenched pussy, your cum spilling out from your puffy folds. Before rising his head, he places a kiss on your clit and your mewl softly in overstimulation.

"I'm not done yet, Baby," he growls, smashing his lips against yours, a hand wrapping around your throat and you gasp while tasting yourself on his tongue before he roughly flips you over, your breasts and stomach pressed against the mattress. 

Then you felt a heavy, throbbing tip press against your clit and you moaned from the small touch. You tried to squirm away from the pleasurable cause but couldn't as Sanzu knew your body more than you did yourself, he knew you were gonna try to run from his body due to the pleasure. So, he pressed his weight against you once more.

You held your breath when Sanzu sank his throbbing cock into your spongey walls, his length getting squeezed by every ridge within your soaked cunt. A moan left both of your mouths as Sanzu's length nudged the deepest spot within you.

"Look how you take me in," Sanzu grunts. "Such a good little slut." You sigh in pleasure at the degradative praise.

But he didn't move, he wanted to relish in on how you desired to cause friction, desired to move against his touch, but couldn't. Sanzu's cock, prodded so deep in your gummy walls that you whimpered in pleasure, but that didn't stop him from not moving. He was still snug inside.

Hot and heavy kisses trail down from your ear down to the dip of your neck to shoulder and a breathless sigh escaped your parted lips before Sanzu rolled his hips into yours. A moan slips out of your mouth, his thick length scraping all the sensitive parts of your warm insides.

Sanzu's knees spread your legs apart so that any advances from you ensured that they would be shut down, so that you remained situated below him, your pretty body that paled in comparison to his big frame. As he expected, you couldn't move from his trapping embrace.

His movements became faster, his cock thrusting into the depths of my needy hole as strained moans and whines left your throat. Sanzu was panting in your ear and an occasional deep groan slipped past his lips, the sounds which made your cunt flutter tightly around his length.

Sanzu was filling you up to the hilt, his throbbing pink tip hitting that soft, gummy spot in your cunt that caused you to scream out in fulfilment. "I know baby, I'm listening," He breathed, causing you to let out a moan and sigh, body shaking with pleasure. "Found it haven't I?" Sanzu smirked.

Your body tried to arch away from the pleasure, not being able to take the strong rolls of Sanzu's hips, but as you arched your back away, his thrusts only aimed deeper, harder into your G spot. "Y-yeah," you sobbed out, tears filling your lash line. "B-but... Too much, 'Haru. Slow down, too much."

"Oh?" he smirked, his hips moving now at a faster pace, loving how your cunt squeezed his cock even though you wanted him to slow down, how contradicting he thought your words were, you were denying your body the release that you so desperately needed. "Looks like you pussy is saying something else," Sanzu added.

Repetitive moans left your mouth while he pounded into your tight heat. You suddenly had the instinctive urge to press yourself into his length, but you couldn't, his weight was too heavy for you to move against him, and you were utterly hopeless as his thrusts became faster.

"Please, I wanna come," you cry out mewling. "So big, you feel so big, Haru..."

Your body trembled beneath him and the hold he had on your hands loosened. Your hips were getting held, then, the strength he possessed lifted you onto your knees before a bicep wrapped around your throat, lifting your head. It wasn't a tight grip but the power lifted your head from the futon while you shakily rested your weight on your elbows.

Your back arched heavily, finally being able to sink more into him. Sanzu hunched over you, pulling you closer to him and connected your mouth in a sloppy, wet kiss, forcing his tongue inside your mouth, grunting into you while he swallowed your moans. "Good girl, taking me so deep," Sanzu groaned, pulling away from your mouth and pushing this arch into your back deeper.

He watched your ass ripping again his lower abdomen, watching your cunt with purple iris'. Observing how your walks sucked him in, leaving a creamy white rind of arousal around the base of his cock. 

"Making you feel so good, aren't I?" Sanzu groaned his head tilted forward, sweat beading on his forehead as we watched your fall apart and tremble from his dick, broken moans slipping past your plump lips.

A satisfied smirk came onto Sanzu's face as he watched those tears that welled in your fluffy lash line spill down your smooth cheeks. "Such a good little- slut," Sanzu groans. "Pussy taking me in so deep."

"'Wanna come, please," you beg, wanting to feel the release, desperate as the tears stream down your flushed cheeks. "Want it so bad."

You clench around his length as he increases his pace, instantly accommodating to the speed but your moans escalate. "Such a good girl," He leaned down and mumbled in my ear chased with a deep moan that stirred my insides clenching around his length. "C'mon, how much you want it?" Sanzu rasps in your ear.

"Want it so bad!" you whimper, unable to comprehend any thoughts that swelled into your head. "Please, please, please!"

"Oh?" Sanzu grunts his teeth grinding.

You moan out, your body trembling. "Please.... I just... 'wanna" you hiccup out, the coil in your stomach tightening while his heavy balls slap against your swollen clit.

"Yeah? Come, on, doll," Sanzu replies groans interrupting his speech, but it made his stomach and balls tighten, wanting to fill up your cunt with his seed.

"Please, I wanna come," you moan.

"Go ahead," he growled and you spasmed around his length as your high washed over you, your legs shaking as his weight pressed down even more than it was. His thrusts didn't slow causing me to whimper in overstimulation, but Sanzu helped it, his hips continuing to rut into you, helping you ride out my orgasm as he chased his own.

With a groan, his lips planted against mine once again as his hips slammed into mine, hard, his cum spilling inside me causing me to moan into his kiss. Sanzu slipped his softening length out and pulled away from the kiss as you slumped to the futon, his eyes chained to the white splotches of silky come that spilled from your gaping cunt.

He wants to break you further.

And that's exactly what he does for the next three months.

It had started with little things, things one dismissed as quirks or habits. Sanzu had this way of making you be consumed entirely by him, as if he was the centre of gravity you just could not pull away from. 

His house turned into a second home you spent more and more time in, never realizing how it became so. How leaving a few clothes there turned into leaving entire drawers filled with your things. 

Your toothbrush beside his, your shoes by the door, your scent mixed with his in the hallways of his penthouse. And then one day, it wasn't just a drawer or two; it was everything. You couldn't remember the last time you'd spent a night at your own place. Your social circle gradually shrank. At first, it was natural, the hours spent with Sanzu were intoxicating. All he had done was comment subtly on your friends-how they didn't really understand you, how they were too unreliable, always leaving you to your own devices. 

He was the one who was always there, the one who truly cared about your well-being. Soon, nights out with friends grew fewer and fewer, replaced by nights waiting for him to come back from work, keeping your phone on silent "out of respect for him," as he had suggested. Yet, for all his affection, his life remained a mystery. 

Every time he went out, he was always vague as to where he went or what he did. His phone, always buzzing with messages, was guarded. Any question you asked was received with a smile and a kiss on the lips: "Just business," he'd shrug and stroke off your queries. When he took you to his 'meetings', you sat outside in luxurious lounges or dimly lit private rooms for hours, waiting without any explanations. You tried not to mind. You tried to believe him, that he was just protective, just keeping you out of something too messy for you to understand. But the doubt gnawed at you, stealing in when he'd come home late at night, his eyes darker, the faint scent of smoke and something metallic clinging to his clothes...

And then... you found out by accident by seeing the messages pinging on his phone while he was in the kitchen, back home from... work. Messages flashed across the screen, names and details you didn't recognize but somehow instinctively knew were dangerous. Then, you see it, you couldn't focus on anything other than what the message said apart from the one word that stood out. Bonten.

The man your're seeing is apart of Bonten. 

Sanzu's late nights, the few strange men he would occasionally meet with, and how his whole world was shrouded in darkness. He wasn't into anything shady-he was deep in one of the most feared criminal organizations in the city. 

And it was too late to pull away. 

"Baby... what are you looking at?" He asks looking over the counter, eyes narrowing at how your sight was locked onto his phone.

Sanzu picks up his iPhone and his gaze darkens at what you had just seen. 

You know now...

"I... I'd like to go on a walk," you abruptly say and Sanzu glances at you through lidded eyes from his phone.

What you were really planning to do was to get as far away as possible from this physco. 

"A walk? Huh, Baby?" he hums, placing his phone screen down to the marble counter. "Go on and do it..." Sanzu hums, face so close to yours you thought he's kiss you but you shyed away and then his eyes darken. "Alrgiht. You wanna play it like that?-" a silence "Run, Baby. Run..." His lips graze you're ear, "Although, you can't run forever."

Run, baby. Run.

It felt like hours, maybe days, but it had only been 2 minutes and you had no idea how long you'd been running, trying to get away from him. Every corner you turned, every dark alley you darted down, the feeling of his presence followed. No matter how fast you went, how hard you pushed yourself, deep down you knew it would never be enough. You can't run forever. He smiled when he'd said it, pale eyes alight with something wild, something dangerous. Sanzu had always been unhinged, but the fire of that gaze, that hunger was something else. You couldn't outrun him. You knew it. Still, you had to try. Your lungs burned, your legs aching, and you went faster.

Too close.

He's always close. It was the sound of his voice, the tone in which he spoke to you that night a lover promising things, dark and twisted. It started with touches that lingered too long, knowing looks, finding his way wherever you were, he begun to follow you around, began to restrict where you went, and made you cut your friends off. But it grew and escalated until you could not breathe without the weight of his obsession bearing down upon you. And now? Now he hunted you. Chased you across town like some prey, sick, a game he was the only one who could win. "Come on," his voice echoed in the back of your head, teasing, low, seductive. "You know you can't run from me, love. Why even try?" You can't stop. But then, just as you might actually have a chance—just as you allow yourself to believe for this one passing moment you can get away from him—you hear it. Footsteps.  Your heart plummets to your stomach. You needn't look around, instinctively, you know who it is. The heavy, rounded sound of the dress shoes on concrete sends a cold quiver running down your spine. "You're making this too easy." His voice was closer now, too close, and your body seemed to freeze well before your brain could catch up with the command to move. You had only time for a single breath, before his hand curled around your wrist, yanking you back against him with terrifying ease. "Haru— You'd barely gotten his name out before his other hand had latched onto your chin, twisting your face up to meet his. Pale, icy blue eyes stared down into your face with an intensity that stole the breath from your lungs. His smile was twisted, the same he'd worn that night-the night he told you you'd never be free of him. "Did you really think you could run from me?" His voice was low, soft, almost caressing. He pulled you close with that much tighter grip. "After all we went through? After all I've done for you? Your heart is racing, and then panic sets in. But Sanzu holds with an iron clutch, his fingers digging into skin, his body pressed up against yours-rendering the impossible task of moving anywhere. "Haru, please." You struggled against him, trying to pull away, but he tightened his hold instead, his smile growing wider at watching you squirm. "I like it when you say my name in that manner," he whispered huskily against your ear. "But I don't like this when you run away from me, it's as if you have no regard for what I have done for you." It moved from your chin upwards, tracing along your throat until fingers wrapped around your neck. The deceptively soft threat was crystal clear, he would end this, end you, at his whim. And the worst of it? The dark thrill dancing in his eyes told you that he liked that idea. "You have any idea how it hurts to see you faking like you can survive without me?" he whispered, the edge of his lips brushing your ear. "To see you try to run? It's almost... an insult." You swallowed hard, your throat closing up under his touch, but your voice shook out in a desperate, quaking whisper. "Haru, I can't. I can't do this anymore." His fingers constricted around your neck ever so slightly, and you gasped. "But you can, baby. You don't have a choice. You belong to me. You always have." "You're mine, and no matter how far you run, no matter how hard you try to get away from me, I'll find you," his lips ghosted over yours, barely touching, before he pulled back just enough to look at your eyes once more. "And when I do, I'll make sure you'll never leave me again." "Don't cry, baby," he whispered, his voice little more than a whisper. "You'll be safe with me. I'll make sure no one else touches you. No one else can have you."

Do not copy, steal, modify, etc. Relogs and like are appreciated.

m.list | tokyo revengers m.list

taglist :: @theblueslytherin @shuzoku @katsunee @flunkedloser

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

Hello, I came to say that dragons are mythical creatures often depicted to be possessive in mythology and literature, sometimes known for their immense power, territorial instincts, and the symbolic association with hoarding wealth and treasures...

Twisted Wonderland in context, Malleus Draconia was confirmed to be a dragon fairy (essentially a dragon who can take a shape of a man), and I was curious if Malleus may have exhibited possessive traits in canon, whether through main story or vignette...?

The reason I ask that is because mischaracterizing characters or making them OOC is the last thing I want to do when it comes to writing or analyzing...

**Sorry if I was not able to word it in a way that you can understand what I'm trying to convey because sometimes I feel inferior that my wording may come off as blunt or insensitive. I just want to leave a brief note that I don't mean to come off as rude or dismissive. I appreciate your understanding!**

In my opinion, Malleus in canon is protective but not possessive. What do I mean by that? Glad you asked. Let's start by laying down some definitions.

In this situation, when I say “protective”, it implies good intentions. It means actively looking out for others' safety and wellbeing. To be possessive, on the other hand, implies a more controlling desire to own or to restrict another's actions. It’s commanding and demanding all of a person’s attention and love. It means having a disrespect for others' autonomy and instead trying to displace it with your will. (Yes, I know that you're probably automatically thinking of The Big Exception of book 7, but I will address that later in this post so hang on for a moment!)

This gets long, so buckle up! We’ve got a lot to talk about.

First thing's first, a lot of the "possessive Malleus" interpretations originate from fandom, especially when it comes to yandere, yume, or generally romantic fan works. (And to be clear: This is NOT to shame the folks who enjoy these kinds of works; I am only listing them here as examples.) Oftentimes this occurs due to individual fans bringing in ideas from media outside the bounds of Twisted Wonderland. This is totally expected and normal; there is no such thing as someone who has an interest in ONLY a singular thing. We will naturally apply our previous knowledge to help us understand and interpret new information.

For example, in irl mythology, fae are hurt by iron--and even in Disney's own films, such as Maleficent, iron is depicted as harming fae and sapping them of their power. This led to many Twst fans headcanoning that iron does the same thing to fae in Twisted Wonderland. However, we learn in book 7 that this is NOT true. Fae, particularly nobles, do find the smell of iron nauseating, but the metal does not appear to impede their powers or hinder them in any way. Lilia and his men are still able to dispatch several Silver Owls (who are dressed in iron arm and battle with iron tanks and other machinery) without issue.

Another example that’s pretty popular is fans believing that whole “if you tell a fairy your name, it grants them power over you” thing. Some have claimed this will come into play in book 7’s final battle. Others claim this is the deeper or secondary reason as to why Malleus doesn’t reveal his own name to Yuu until book 5, as giving his name would grant Yuu power over him. However, there’s nothing in-universe to suggest that names have cultural significance to fae or that any sort of power or status is granted by relinquishing one’s name. Yuu (or Malleus’s hundreds of other classmates) have also demonstrated no such control over him.

Remember: what is true outside of Twst, including in Disney's own works, is NOT necessarily true inside of Twst.

Going back to the initial question, I believe that "Malleus is possessive" is also a headcanon of a similar vein; fans are coming into Twst familiar with other mythos which state that dragons are possessive, territorial, and greedy on top of being powerful. Because Malleus is a dragon fae and is known to possess great power, it's very easy for fans to see the parallels between him and the dragons they already know of. This then leads to them filling in the gaps of his personality and projecting other stereotypical draconic traits onto him. In Malleus's case, this was extremely easy to do because it took a few years for him to see any significant spotlight in both event stories (Glorious Masquerade) and in the main story (book 7).

I think the easiest way for us to analyze whether Malleus is protective or possessive is to examine his closest relationships in the narrative of Twst. I will not be counting Sebek and Silver individually here, as they are both his bodyguards and Malleus maintains a mostly professional relationship with them. Instead, we shall look at Malleus's attitude by looking at his relationships with Lilia and Yuu, then proceed into discussing related behaviors.

I believe it's indisputable that Lilia is one of the most important people to Malleus. Lilia trained him, taught him, and trained him. He is basically Malleus's father figure. The fear of losing Lilia is what causes Malleus to emotionally spiral and take drastic measures in a desperate attempt to avoid that unhappy ending. His entire motivation for unleashing his UM is "not losing [Lilia]!" You would think that if Malleus was going to be possessive of anyone, it would be with Lilia. But the truth of the matter is... he's mostly just... not? Lilia is a very sociable person in the student body. He's frequently gaming with Idia, taking care of or lending wisdom to others (Silver, Sebek, etc.), hanging out with Cater and Kalim in their club, interacting with dorm leaders and freshmen when Malleus is absent for ceremonies, and more--yet Malleus doesn't seem to express any jealousy over sharing Lilia. I'd also like to add that although Malleus lacks parents, he doesn't really show envy over Lilia treating and calling Silver his own son instead of himself. Oh, Malleus certainly does express jealousy to some extent. Who would forget the time in his Dorm Uniform vignettes when he crushed Lilia's phone? The thing is though, the times when Malleus is upset are not fueled by not wanting to share Lilia or wanting to monopolize his time. In the previous example I cited, Malleus broke Lilia's phone because Lilia had received a picture Kalim and the other dorm leaders took after a meeting. Even the dialogue exchanged implies this; Malleus did not automatically get mad when he noticed that Lilia had a notification, he only got mad after realizing he was excluded from something the other dorm leaders were all involved in. Malleus was upset that he was not invited, not that Kalim was texting Lilia. Additionally, it is stated that the dorm leader must grant permission for others to use the lounge. If he wanted to, he could withhold the permission for Lilia, who wants the lounge for his farewell party (which everyone is invited to), or stipulate that he wants a more formal affair with just Diasomnia members present. Malleus doesn’t act in this possessive way though. He grants Lilia what he desires without issue.

Next up for scrutiny is Yuu! Now, there's some gray area here because part of Yuu's relationship with Malleus is defined by how much the player projects onto the self-insert/blank slate character. Please note that, when I discuss Yuu, I am leaving out individual interpretations and going STRICTLY by the information presenting in canon.

It can be said that Malleus slowly develops a fondness for Yuu's company over the course of the main story. At first, he is surprised and maybe even a little disappointed that someone has taken residence in Ramshackle--it used to be desolate, which makes it a perfect spot to visit on his nightly strolls. However, Malleus soon finds amusement in the fact that Yuu, not being of this world, has no clue who he is or what his status is. This grants him the freedom to speak at ease with this human and to "be himself" in a way that he cannot be with others, who typically cower at his name. You could also argue that Yuu telling Malleus they may have found a way home expedited the despair he felt in book 7, as he learned so quickly that two of his friends would be exiting his life soon. This, however, is not possessiveness. It's normal to have fear and anxiety about losing the people you love.

Malleus's voice lines also do not indicate possessiveness. Yes, there's the usual and expected fanservice-y lines where he invites Yuu to come and engage in various activities with him, but nothing in those suggests he would exclude others or become upset if they also wanted to join. (Are you telling me that Malleus wouldn't want to talk for hours on end about the glory of gargoyles to TWO people instead of just one?????) Additionally, all the characters get similar fanservice-y lines, so it's not something exclusive to Malleus. There was one line that gave me pause: "You always seem to attract a crowd... More so than I'd like, really." Buuut I think this could be read a number of ways, not solely in an ‘I want you all to myself’ way. Malleus actually does like to be alone, hence his nightly strolls. The line can therefore also be read as Malleus enjoying solitude or one-on-one conversations as opposed to addressing a group. In that case, it's a personal preference and not necessarily a sign of possessiveness. He’s definitely not completely averse to group activities though; there are lines where Malleus invites Yuu to do things with him and other characters. For example, from his PE Uniform: “Sebek has been badgering me to help train him. I'll permit you to join us. ... You're coming, I trust?”

The guy generally doesn't get angry or annoyed if Yuu mentions having other friends or managing the 7 member VDC/SDC group. In fact, he sometimes encourages Yuu to interact with others. One of his birthday lines is, "You needn't linger and focus on me to the exclusion of others. I want everyone to enjoy the party, yourself included." Malleus doesn’t so much as flinch or react when a complete stranger kisses the back of Yuu’s hand either. If he was truly possessive, wouldn’t he have gotten angry or—at the very least—have frowned or tried to put some distance between Yuu and said stranger? Yet Malleus doesn’t really react or comment on it despite being present.

Malleus seems to understand that it's not very polite to demand all of someone's time or attention--and this makes perfect sense of his character. He is a royal, and that means he was taught proper manners. Malleus has even indicated before that his grandmother stressed the importance of observing etiquette, particularly around invitations. You don't just invite yourself to functions or insert yourself into others' lives if not extended said invites... and Malleus, for the most part, adheres to those rules. In various voice lines, he even frets over committing social faux pas, wondering if he has offended his peers with certain behaviors. For example, from his Masquerade Dress: "Flamme shoots me stern looks on occasion. Have I behaved improperly in some way...?"

Malleus is also not generally possessive when it comes to his items or territory. He wants to share cake with others; eating a whole one gave him heartburn and now whole cakes are his least favorite food. Additionally, he tends to welcome people to Diasomnia rather than chase them out or expel them. (After all, they so rarely get visitors in the first place.) Malleus will at least hear out the reasoning for seeking him out. As an example, Leona (someone who has had a rocky history with Malleus) goes to Diasomnia in his Ceremonial Robes vignettes to exchange robes after a laundry mix-up. This is a stark contrast to the highly territorial Leona, who attacks a magicless human in thd Botanical Garden and also allows his own students to wail on Yuu and co. for simply walking being in Savanaclaw. Leona joins in on this bullying too. I think it's pretty clear that Malleus handles guests with far more tact, grace, and patience than his fellow prince.

I want to point out that though Malleus is usually amicable with guests, there are exceptions. Ramshackle, as I mentioned earlier, is a place he enjoys a lot. He indicates in his Halloween Dress card that “If anyone dares to damage [this] dorm, I will be as a lóng and reduce them to cinders. I have become rather fond of that place, after all.” Indeed, he does act on this promise in Terror is Trending and comes close to striking down Magicam Monsters for disrespecting a place he holds so dear. Is this possessive though? Yes, it’s a place he loves—but it’s also a place where his friend Yuu lives.

There are many other examples of Malleus going to extreme lengths to protect the things he loves. He vows to destroy Rollo Flamme, who poses a threat to his people, the fae (who depend on magic as their way of life, and the sentient gargoyles, whom he has recently befriended. He unleashes his mighty magic to attack those who wound his pride. He stops time and kidnaps the entire student body all for the sake of including ghosts in a Halloween celebration. And, of course, he sends Sage’s Island to sleep in a desperate bid to stop losing everyone. The majority of these behaviors involve him lashing out at those who pose legitimate threats to things he cares about. It’s not as though be is acting for no discernible reason or because he is doesn’t want his loved ones being with people other than him. Does that make these actions right? No, absolutely not. But I would say they are definitely more protective than possessive.

Very rarely is Malleus actively preventing his peers from spending time away from him. Sure, he gets upset that he’s not invited to join them and sure, he wishes people would invite him too—but there’s a difference between longing and being mopey about this and acting so domineering he’s breathing down the necks of others to only be with him. He is not stopping people from being with their friends and family. He is not stopping people from using his things or entering his territory. Even when he makes everyone sleep, he grants them the space to craft their own dreams and doesn’t even make the dreams center around him and his own involvement on their lives. Oftentimes the dreams involve several other characters that are important to the individual dreamer and Malleus does not appear at all. (Again, this doesn’t mean using his UM was the best move to resolve his issues; I’m just saying his actions were not necessarily possessive.)

So, in conclusion, I stand by the thesis at I proposed at the start of this post: Malleus is largely protective, not possessive, despite what many fandom interpretations would have you believe.

[k-tarotz]

Would You Survive A Horror Movie? | PAC

𐙚 1 𐙚 2 𐙚 3

𐙚 4 𐙚 5 𐙚 6

written by Candy

Since Halloween is here, I thought I would do a more dark pick a card! I wish I could have posted more for spooktober, but unfortunately I couldn’t. Regardless, I came up with this because I genuinely think it’s a fun concept and we have all been curious about something like this at least once in our lives. If you dressed up as anything for halloween or will please do let me know! I love hearing what people dressed up as! 🫶🏻

Pile One

🃏: the moon, the star, ten of coins, eight of wands side ways

Hii my beautiful pile one! You would definitely survive a horror movie, but not alone. I do think that you would do better in a group because you are someone that thrives better in them, even if you are usually quiet or more on the shy side. This is honestly due to you being able to rely on someone, you need a sense of stability to not completely lose yourself to fear.

Honestly, being in a group could also remind you of reasons why you would keep alive, it could be quite a big motivator factor for you to be honest. Especially since I do think that most people choosing this pile thought of a very specific scenario, trope, AU or media that they would like to partake in! [for some of you this is a zombie apocalypse scenario/AU.]

At first you might be a bit lonely, but you have the kind of spirit that doesn’t give up. You aren’t easy to bring down. So you could for sure survive on your own, and you would, but it isn’t necessarily something that you would enjoy. It might even make you think that you won’t be able to survive, because perhaps you don’t trust in your own abilities that much, even tho you are awesome trust. Regardless, because of this you will keep seeking out a group to be a part of and will offer your help and rely on other people when needed. I do think that you are also very great at listening to other people, so that’s nice in this scenario! It would help in high tension situations, bc you would always be able to tell what’s right to do at the given moment. Although, I do think that you would be mentally scarred from the experience, you tend to be more sensitive to heavy stuff than the average person. (Which isn’t a bad trait at all, so no worries about that.)

Regardless, your energy seems like one of someone incredibly sweet yet still badass.

Thank you for reading! Please don’t forget to look at our paid readings if you enjoyed this! 🤍

Pile Two

🃏: the devil, the lovers, three of swords, eight of swords reversed, the world

Hello my dark romance enjoyer pile.~ If that doesn’t apply to you, this is probably not your reading. Either way, when it comes to you, it really depends on several factors. Do you know the killer? Are they attractive? Do you hate their personality or not? How are you feeling on that specific day? So many things to answer, so many things to say. Regardless, I do think that for the most part you would survive, unless you are like super depressed that day and genuinely have no will to keep on fighting.. or if the person physically overpowers you simply due to them having way more strength than you do.

Otherwise you would survive tho.

Matter of fact if the person that would try and kill you is a person that you hate you would just kill them yourself. You as a victim just sounds wrong, you know how to fight for yourself if you need to. The energy is sort of like ‘no human can bring me down unless I allow them to.’ (or creature if you are thinking of something along the lines of an alien or monster.)

Now, regardless of all of that.. as I already mentioned, some of you are into dark romance. This could be due to the media you consume, but I genuinely don’t think it’s a bad thing bc this pile seems very intelligent and also daydreamy!

Regardless, if you will like the person you will for sureee try to seduce them. Yes, the killer. I don’t mean this in a sexual or really sensually charged way, but like by treating them nice and being yourself, not being overly scared and reactive. (Someone in this pile likes venom a lot.. yes it applies to you too.) It would work though. You would gain yourself a pretty partner just by being yourself and I honestly think that’s adorable!

Though people might think you are a victim but you would be happy, just chilling. It reminds me of Gomez and Morticia Addams.. Morbid but full of genuine love without any sort of doubt between them. It’s very cute!

Thank you for reading! Please don’t forget to look at our paid readings if you enjoyed this! 🤍

Pile Three

🃏: the fool, five of coins reversed, the tower, wheel of fortune

Well in real life? No, you would absolutely die first, you would keep making the wrong choices over and over, because you would simply not be able to think straight because of fear, at all.

In a movie? you would survive for sure, simply due to pure luck. And plot armour, you would be the main character for sure. I think, if you would be in a horror movie people would watch it due to it being entertaining, not because it’s scary at all.

I do not mean this in a bad way at all though, of course, I don’t look at this as a bad thing. Your energy is more like the scary movies with ghost face rather than a story right out of the conjuring. So people would love the movie because you are fun, easy to relate to and very entertaining!

If you would be in a horror movie it would very specifically be one with a serial killer, or at least a real human in it, because I don’t think you would actually be scared of anything paranormal but that you would rather brush it off.

Though, in real life your story would unfortunately be tragic, but one that would get a lot of media exposure and bring awareness to people! Of course you are safe though, don’t worry about things that haven’t happened 🫶🏻

Thank you for reading! Please don’t forget to look at our paid readings if you enjoyed this! 🤍

Pile Four

🃏: the high priestess reversed, six of cups reversed, three of cups reversed, king of swords, page of cups

No, because you are simply too self sacrificing. I don’t think there is much to say about your pile aside from how loving and good hearted you are. I do think that most of you would self sacrifice yourself for your friends or family, but many of you would sacrifice yourselves for pets or helpless animals in general. You would rather sacrifice yourself than allow them to suffer, even if there is a slight chance of them surviving due to your sacrifice you will take it.

However, I do think that many of you would not even bother to try and save yourselves. For some of you the people and pets that you love are your everything, your motivation to keep on going and live your life everyday. So if they go you won’t try to keep on living. For this group, I do not think that there is an exception due to how big your heart is, due to how loving you are. You guys are very empathetic people, you might give more than you receive in life and that especially emotionally. Unfortunately, that would be your weakness in this. Maybe even now you put others before your own self.

Though, I do think yours would be a natural disaster horror movie (for example ‘under paris’, or a tsunami or something. definitely something that includes water though.) so not the cliche killers or paranormal experience.

Maybe, for only a few of you, there is someone that you love so much that if they tried to kill you (drown you), you wouldn’t mind at all. Just let them. You could have realised this while watching some media? Either way, yours would be a story of tragedy. (Please do not let anybody hurt you though.)

Thank you for reading! Please don’t forget to look at our paid readings if you enjoyed this! 🤍

Pile Five

🃏: the magician, four of cups reversed, the wheel of fortune, justice, ace of cups

You would survive because you are very smart! Yours would be more of a survival story, becoming a horror due to the cruel realistic things portrayed in it. With stomach turning scenes that absolutely do happen in the real world, in the shadows, in secret, which would he the horrifying part about it! Hard to wrap your head around, but still plausible if you give it a thought for a little while.

Regardless I do think that you would get along well with the killer, but not due to genuine interest at all, rather because you would want them to believe that they can trust you, that they can confide in you and that you listen well to them. Which you would, you would earn their trust in you and when they least expect it escape. (Bc I honestly think you are the sort of person that would get kidnapped and held captive, based on the energy in this pile.) So to put it simply; you would intentionally manipulate them so they won’t kill you right off the bat or hurt you as severely as they intended to do so. Though I don’t think you would be without any traumas, you would be much more lucky than victims that have came before you because you would know how to achieve your goals. How to pull the strings without being suspicious or causing chaos.

You would have a silent confidence in yourself despite being scared; because you are someone that’s very mentally strong.

You would survive due to pure tactics and because you would never get too comfortable or lost in your thoughts, lost in your feelings and emotions. There would definitely be a tunnel vision of what your goal is which would save your life!

Thank you for reading! Please don’t forget to look at our paid readings if you enjoyed this! 🤍

Pile Six

🃏: judgement, ten of cups, king of coins, death, six of swords

Yes, but there is nothing really celebratory about at all. At least you wouldn’t find anything joyous about it. Rather, there is a bittersweet feeling of guilt. Sure, you would be happy that you survived but you would feel like you shouldn’t have at all. That someone else more deserving of it should have, that they should have lived instead. It’s like you would try to convince yourself that you don’t deserve to be alive, which is not true, but you wouldn’t be able to live with the guilt. Everyday you would be reminded of it, even in the ordinary and simple things.

I do also feel like this is in regards a very specific person that is close to your heart! They wouldn’t survive, but you would and I don’t think you would be able to live your life in a healthy way without them. You would think about them a lot, everyday.

It reminds me of the end of “Train To Busan” where the pregnant lady and the little girl survived, they lived but ultimately you could see the devastation on their face. They weren’t happy at all, just exhausted. One lost a husband, and one lost her father.

You would be like that, a ghost of who you used to be to the point of no return. I do think you would live on though, for them. To honour them, to not disrespect them.

Thank you for reading! Please don’t forget to look at our paid readings if you enjoyed this! 🤍

[aro-culture-is]

What is a QPR and why are aros attracted to it /gen, I’m new to all of this and I want to learn.

QPR = QueerPlatonic Relationship.

This is a term that explicitly has a vague definition, because it is meant to encompass many things. That said, the definition I think is most useful is "a relationship which queers the culturally normative platonic relationship". Yes, this is broad, yes, it can apply to all sorts of folks and situations that probably don't use the term, and yes, it's not very explanatory by itself.

But. The point of this term is to be open to describing a lot of things for those who find it useful. Originating in a-spec communities, the idea of a QPR is typically a long-term, committed relationship that is not romantic, may or may not be sexual, and may be platonic, but not in a way that typical friendships are seen as.

For example: an aromantic person and an aro-spec friend of theirs are close. They intend to move in together, live together, and for all intents and purposes, make major decisions together which are typically viewed as things married couples do (like buying a house, moving for jobs, adopting pets). They do not feel romantic attraction to each other, but they wouldn't do this with just any friend of theirs. They have a close bond, and it's not really understood by a lot of folks around them, who may, depending on the genders of the individuals involved, be assumed to be (romantically) together and inept at romance, be together but poorly closeted, be poor poor bachelors who will never get a girl that way... all sorts of stuff, and a lot of the assumptions place a "that's not entirely platonic" bent on it. Thus: queer.

There's been debate about QPRs in all sorts of ways over the years, some in good faith, some not, some productive in exploring our assumptions, and some which deeply hurt and ostracized other members of our community. Some of these remnants of debates are popular to run into - some may refer to QPRs as halfway between romantic and platonic, some may insist that there should be a separate term for sexual or non-sexual QPRs (broadly, consensus was that this was an unacceptable division, redefining a term used to mean both from the beginning, usually a discussion in poor faith by either a sex-negative and/or sex-repulsed individual), and some may attack the way that this term doesn't require all individuals involved to be queer. Truthfully, my advice as someone who's identified as aromantic for a little over a decade?

Always leave space for people to have their terms, but never, ever enforce those terms on others. If a term is useful to the individual(s) involved, fantastic! If it fits them to a T, but they don't like it? Don't use it for them! Frankly, view that as similar to misgendering - they've now explicitly said they don't want to be called that. Just... be nice.

Lastly, for reasons I don't quite recall, people in QPRs used to be called zucchinis as a cutesy thing. The relationship itself was a QPR, and the people were each other's zucchini. :)

[txttletale]

Can you elaborate on what you think would be the minimal needed changes to fix what you see as an issue in Civ? Civ has done fairly large shifts in some mechanics before, and "civ like" is still an interesting game space that can scratch certain itches

yeah i mean as i said, the baked-in racism arises from a certain set of core assumptions that i think lock it into that position, which are that civ is a

1) symmetrical

2) 4X

game about

3) 'real world civilizations' (deeply loaded terms ofc but that's how civ envisions them)

4) trying to 'win the game'

5) with a global

6) and transhistorical

scope

so, in its role as a symmetrical (1) game with victory conditions (4), civ as a text has to take positions on what constitutes a 'successful civilization'. as a (2) 4X game this definition also has to include some variation on the profoundly loaded eponymous Xs, 'explore, expand, exploit, and exterminate'. furthermore, as a (1) symmetrical game with a global, transhistorical (5, 6) scope, it has to necessarily create a model of what 'a civilization' looks like and apply it to every 'civilization' it wants to include, at all points in their history.

this all kind of naturally leads into civ being a game in which the colonial european imperialist powers are the default 'civilizations' and all other cultures are basically just like them -- a game where technology progresses linearly and innovations are made in the order they were in european imperial history -- a game where all cultures fundamentally work in the same way and hold similar values, a game where all religions are based on christianity (i mean, just look at civ vi's system, where every religion has a 'prophet', 'apostles', 'missionaries' and 'inquisitors'), a game where not only do cultures have teleological overarching 'goals' but where these goals are shared and these goals are fundamentally based on imperialist visions of 'victory'.

to drill into some specific examples: you can't play a game of civilization without founding cities. you will constantly be founding cities. when you're playing as 'the mongols' or 'the cree' or 'scythia', this makes no sense! these were peoples who historically had rich culture, science, arts, and certainly a notable military history, but were (to varying degrees, at varying times in their history, i don't mean to create a new and similarly heterogenous absolutist category here) nomadic!

similarly, to advance in civilization you must invent 'the wheel'. 'the wheel' is necessary to many later innovations, while of course the andean peoples represented by the playable 'inca' never made significant use of the wheel because the lack of suitable pack animals and environmental factors meant that it did not, in fact, prove a suitable tool for transporting large quantities of heavy goods. for an even more glaring example, a lot of early military technology is locked behind 'horses', which is pretty absurd considering that several of the game's playable civilizations, in the real world, developed plenty of military technology despite living on a continent without any horses!

so having established what i mean by 'the issue', which is that the game's core assumptions lock it into imposing a eurocentric, imperialist vision of 'civilization' onto cultures where it doesn't make sense, here's a few different jenga blocks you could pull out to resolve it:

SID MEIER'S EUROPE

the pillar you knock out here is #5. keep the game engine and core assumptions just as founded on eurocentric imperialist societies as they are now, and just make it about european empires doing imperialism. now, i think we can immediately spot some problems in there -- how are we going to represent the rest of the world? after all, this kind of just creates a situation where, either as NPC factions or as outright exclusions, all other cultures in the world are deprived of any meaningful agency in "history". this one just kind of gives you a new problem and also from a gameplay standpoint results in a game that just Has Less Stuff On It. i think this is a bad one

SID MEIER'S ELYSIUM

now here's one you can get if you knock out pillar #3. keep the same assumptions and gameplay and transhistorical global narrative scale, but remove the 'real-world' aspects. you can get real silly with it and add fantasy stuff to it, or you can be a relatively grounded 'our-world-but-to-the-left' situation. now to some extent this already matches a lot of the features already in civ games: after all, unless you specifically load in a 'true start location earth' map, you're usually playing on a strange parallel world with semiplausible but wholly original continents! now, you also need to get some fucking Nerds and Geeks working at your company to build out your fictional world, or you'll just end having pointlessly pallette swapped a bunch of factions that are now just Schmance, Schmina, and the Schoman Schempire, and not really have avoided the issue. but if you do that, and invent a deep and rich fictional history to riff on, then you could create something really cool and incorporate alt-tech or fantasy or retrofuturistic elements or all sorts of cool shit.

the downside of this is that it makes your game less accessible and appealing to a lot of people. a big part of (at least the initial) appeal of civilization is pointing at the screen and saying 'hey i recognize that thing!'. it is instantly more accessible to someone who isn't super invested in strategy or fantasy dork shit to say to them 'you can be BRAZIL and nuke FRANCE while at war with CHINA and allied to BABYLON'.

more importantly than that, i think some parts of the historical theming (because let's be honest, it is ultimately theming, i don't think civ is interested in 'history' in any serious way) serve a pretty load-bearing role in the game's information economy. it's a pretty tall order to ask a player to remember the unique abilities of dozens of factions and unique wonders, and the historical background makes it a lot easier. e.g., it is a lot easier for a player looking at wonders to remember 'the pyramids need to be built on desert' or 'broadway will help me make more culture' than it would be for them to remember the requirements/effects of 'under-eusapia' or the 'wompty dompty dom center'. i think this is one of the number one things that, if subtracted, would meaningfully create something that is no longer 'sid meier's civilization'.

SID MEIER'S ALPHA CENTAURI

now if you cut out #3 and #5 and #6 on the other hand... sid meier's alpha centauri is not technically an entry in the civilization franchise, but i think most people correctly consider it one. it has similar 4X gameplay to the series, and its (very bad) spiritual successor beyond earth was an official entry. instead of 'civilizations', the playable factions are splinters from a colony ship that fell into civil war as soon as it landed, each one representing a distinct ideology. now, y'know, this doesn't mean it's free from Some Problems (the portrayal of the Human Hive in particular is some of the worst apects of 90s orientalism all piled together) but i think they're problems it's not at all locked into by its design!

SID MEIER'S THERMOPILAE

by cutting out #5 and #6 -- making a civ game about a particular time and place in history you could achieve something much more richly detailed in mecahnics while also being able to handwave a lot more homogeny into it. giving the same basic mechanics to, say, every greek city-state in the peloponnesian war is far less ideologically loaded than giving them to every 'historical civilization' someone who watched a few history channel documentaries once can think of. it also lets you get really into the weeds and introduce era-and-place-specific mechanics.

the scale needs to be smaller conceptually but it doesn't really have to be smaller in terms of gameplay -- just make maps and tech trees and building more granular, less large-scale and more local and parochial and specific. this also gives you the advantage of being able to do the opposite of the last two options and really lean hard into the historical theming.

if this sounds like a good idea to you, then good news -- old world does something pretty similar, and it's pretty good! worth checking out.

SID MEIER'S LOVE AND PEACE ON PLANET EARTH

what if we take an axe to #2 and #4? instead of putting all these civilizations into a zero-sum game of violent expansion, make it possible for several civilization to win, for victory goals to not inherently involve 'defeating' or 'beating' other factions. now, that doesn't mean that the game should be a confictless city-builder -- after all, if you've decided to be super niceys and just try and make your society a pleasant place to live, that doesn't mean that the guy next to you isn't going to be going down the militarist-expansionist path. hell, even if all you want to do is provide for your citizens, a finite map with finite resources is going to drive you into conflict of some kind with your neighbours in the long run.

to make this work you'd have to add a bunch of new metrics -- 'quality of life', for example, as a more granular and contextual version of the 'happiness' mechanics a few games have had, or 'equality', game metrics that you could pursue to try to build an egalitarian, economically and socially just society where everyone is provided for. after all, why shouldn't that be a goal to strive for just as much as going to mars or being elected super world president or whatever?

SID MEIER'S DIVERSE HISTORICAL CONTEXTS

ultimately, all cards on the table, if i was made god-empress of The Next Civ Game, this is the option i'd go for: jettison #1 as much as practically possible, introduce as much asymmetry into the game as you can. some civilizations keep the established settler-city model -- others are nomadic, building their units in movable 'camps' -- maybe the 'colonial' civilizations, your USA and Brazil and so on, can be like the alien factions from the alpha centauri DLC, only showing as NPCs at the appropriate point in the timeline when other civs are colonizing other continents, or putting you into an accelerated-forward version of the game if you choose to play as one.

you could combine this with a more interesting version of humankind's civ-choosing system, where you lock certain civilization choices behind specific gameplay events. this would let you do crazy shit with the balancing -- imagine an ostrogothic kindgom civ with crazy strong abilities and units that you could only choose to play as if your capital is overrun by barbarians, or a hungarian civ that requires you to have started as a nomadic civ and invaded somewhere, or a soviet union civ that requires you to lose a revolution, or a usamerican civ that requires you to split off all cities on a foreign continent from your original civ -- you could add so much variety and so many new and bizarre strategies into the game with this!

as for the universal aspects of tech and the narratives of linear progression contained within, there are lots of approaches that already solve this! stuff like stellaris' semi-random branching tech paths, or endless space 2's circular tech web, could allow civilizations to take tech paths that make sense for them, rather than imposing one single model of 'technological progress' on the wole world.

obviously there's limits to this, right -- civilization isn't going to be a detailed historical materialism simulator any time soon. but i think abandoning the idea that every faction has to play fundamentally the same and introducing some severe asymmetry as well as choices that you can make after starting the game would work wonders to wash out some of the racist and colonialist assumptions built into the game's foundation, while also (imo) creating a more fun and interesting game.

[soaringwide]

PAC: What will be revealed to you this fall? [Ko-fi extended] How to make the most out of it? Advice and guidance

Fall is a heavily introspective season for me, which is why I wanted to do a reading that focuses on self-knowledge. The question is: What will be revealed to you this fall? and I will leave it open for any type of subject, be it something you will learn about yourself, or something outside of you.

I hope this reading is helpful to you and as always, remember that this is a general reading meant for many people and that it might not apply 100%. Take what resonates and leave out the rest.

For those who wish to push this reading further, there is a ko-fi extended reading that will focus on giving you advice and guidance on how to make the most out of it. More info in my pinned post or on my ko-fi page.

book a reading ★ ko-fi membership ★ all free PACs ★ pinned post ★ IG

PILE 1 ★ blue skull

Cards: 6 of Wands, Queen of Wands, 9 of Pentacles, Bottled up, Courage, Judgement, 10 of Pentacles, the Sun, 7 of Cups, Page of Swords, the Chariot, 7 of Swords, 5 of Swords, 9 of Swords, Page of Pentacles, 10 of Wands, Hope

Hello Pile 1, This reading doesn't has a set and definite area of life, but given your cards, I think it has to do with practical matters such as job or life situations and how you are interacting with it and perceiving it.

So for your current situation, I can definitely see that there's something lying underneath that has quite a negative note, but that you are trying your best to keep your heads up, being brave and look at things with positivity. You're trying to take care of yourself, look at the future, think of the success you could achieve, and as a result, you might be bottling up a lot of darker feelings that are getting the way and that could put your progression to a stop, or at least that's how you feel. You really are in a fighting mode at the moment. You don't want anything or anyone to get in the way. You have a goal, a wish, a dream to bring things to a better state.

The good thing about the situation is that you are done with the bullshit, you are done with the lies and the illusions, and you're ready to take the matter into your own hands. You understand that this situation brought you a lot and helped you grow, but that you are nearing the end of a chapter and that there is so much more to gain if you dare to go and do something else. Despite being a difficult situation, you're definitely coming out of it in a better place than when you entered it, so it's not a loss but rather something that brought you a lot and has run its course.

For what's your struggling with, you have a hard time trusting and being carefree, because I can sense the tension and worry over it. You want to be more at ease, more playful, but you don't feel like you can do that. There is also a part of you that is still wondering if you can actually move on from this situation, and if you re not going to lose something in the process, even though you know that what you're leaving behind cannot kept because it's dead weight. You don't know where this journey is leading you, and it's creating worries and doubts.

What will be revealed to you this Fall is about finding back this sense of hope despite the heavy situation. There are three things here.

First, you may feel like a lone soldier, lost and isolated in the face of this struggle, having to face heads on what's threatening you and hide your fears not let them consume you or appear weak. Yet it's also the realization that you're moving to the sound of your own drum, that you are free to go towards a different path, one that you chose for yourself and that could bring you much success down the line.

Secondly, you might be pushed to use what you think are dishonest tactics in order to get the most out of this situation. This is definitely a messy battle but one that you can come out of it like a winner, a bitter one but a winner nonetheless, if you play your cards correctly.

Thirdly, the realization, that all that you've been bottling up, all these heavy thoughts, these sleepless nights of anxiety, they can't continue and that yeah you might get hit in the face with them a bit, but realizing them also help you seek a solution. It's just that you've been ignoring them for too long and it reached an explosive point, which is not a bad thing but just a sign that things cannot continue the way they are. A new seed will be planted, a new journey to take on.

Link to the extended reading for ko-fi members, "How to make the most out of it".

PILE 2 ★ yellow skull

Cards: 4 of Pentacles, the Chariot, 7 of Pentacles, Optimism, 6 of Cups, 2 of Wands, Worn Out, Worry, Queen of Wands, Knight of Cups, The Magician, Ambition, 6 of Wands, the World rx, Queen of Cups, 3 of Swords, Valiant a Courage

For your current situation, you want to make big changes and big moves in your life, but you're currently feeling quite restricted, stuck in the same old routine, the same old places, hesitant to let go and perhaps a bit aimless as well. There is an intense feeling that you've outgrown your current situation or environment, but a hesitation to make that move, due to fearing that you're going to lose what you have.

At the same time, there is a strong faith that things will change eventually, and that it's all about being patient and working step by step towards your goal. It's like you can see the night sky above you, you know that so much more is possible and that you can transform your life, you feel this vibrant hope that transcends your current reality, yet it's hard to know where you should go.

What is going well here is that I think you're getting over some type of exhaustion you've felt in the past, perhaps weeks, months or even years. You're finally getting out of it and finding enough resources within you to look forward. I think this is making you look back on who you were, what you valued and loved, as a way to better align with who you want to become. It seems to be a great thing for you as a way to consider your options and see what suits your own unique perspective on life, and an important step to take at the moment.

What is not going so well though, is that I see you struggling to get past the fears that are paralyzing you, to some extent. I think you struggle with seeing your own strength of character, but also your skills. You have a lot to offer to the world, from a personal point of view but also what you can do, but you fail to fully embrace it. You fear that you wont be able to take out the gift you hold within you for all to see, perhaps because you don't know how to communicate it or to make something out of it, or perhaps because you worry its not going to be received well, that it doesn't fit anywhere in this world.

What will be unveiled for you this Fall is a renewed ambition and a desire to overcome the obstacles in your way. You will see more clearly what's holding you back, the hurt and the pain you've carried and you will stare right at it in order to untangle it, because you know it is the first step toward future success. Here it is all about solving these blockages by taking actions that feel different and revolutionary for yourself. You will be aware that in order to step into your new chapter, it is necessary to sooth these sore points and to show yourself that you can overcome them. You won't be holding back anymore and you will realize that you've done the hardest part already, and that these obstacles will seem like they are melting in the sun as your resolution to move forward grows. I think an important point for some of you will be to speak your own truth with authenticity, which will heal you because I think that's something you've always wanted to do yet never totally did and it caused these blockages.

Link to the extended reading for ko-fi members, "How to make the most out of it".

PILE 3 ★ pink skull

Cards: 9 of Cups, 3 of Wands, the Emperor, Relieved, Justice, 4 of Pentacles, 10 of Pentacles, Anxiety, Queen of Pentacles, 3 of Swords, King of Pentacles, 5 of Wands, 4 of Wands, Renewal, Healing, Overwhelmed, Unknown Territory, Traveling Lightly

From the outside, it seems you currently have everything you need and seem quite stable and successful. However, I do sense some type of restlessness. Something is missing, and you don't really know what. It is possible that you fought hard to get where you are at the moment, and now that you've achieved it, you don't know where to go next. It's like you expected to be at peace by now, but the reality is that you don't feel that way.

For what is going well, I definitely think that financially, things are quite stable, you've been careful about your spendings and are in a comfortable and balanced situation. There's definitely something big, like some type of achievement or something you acquired that feels like a milestone you've worked patiently towards. Perhaps you used to have debts or fines that you've finally put behind you after carefully paying them back. In all cases, this used to cause a lot of anxiety, and while the reason for it is gone, it's still lingering.

So it makes sense that for you struggles, you are still dealing with these pains that getting out of this situation caused you. I see you struggling to find hope for the future and also struggling to take care of yourself properly. I think you put your own needs and desire at the back, that you probably didn't really take care of this anxiety of yours because it was more important in the moment to take care of this heavy situation.

What will be revealed to you this Fall is the importance of releasing steam, and by that I mean all these emotions you've bottled up previously. It will be a time of renewal and healing for you if you decide to choose yourself and an opportunity to dedicate some time for the aspects of your life you've neglected. It might feel uncomfortable at times. You may feel lost in this new era, but it will help you unburden yourself emotionally and allow you to recharge your batteries. I see a time for socializing, reconnecting with friends and family, and even meeting new people. Also a time to enjoy the fruits of your labor and splurge on yourself a little, which in your case is not a bad thing at all.

Link to the extended reading for ko-fi members, "How to make the most out of it