#but also just felt so sorry for myself
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
Watching the green death again and I was just thinking about how the first time I watched this serial I cried and then refused to watch it again for a very long time
Anyway, do yall ever just think about Jo Grant?
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
Girl deserves the world, she’s such a beautiful soul
14 notes · View notes
moeblob · 2 months ago
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media
North and Simon: (shaking hands on killing Simon potentially)
164 notes · View notes
dizzybizz · 3 months ago
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
some doodles
#i meant to put the balor one in the previous post but i forgor 😭its in a diff file from the sketch dump i was coloring in so it just didnt#exist in my mind at all. i felt like smth was missing as i was posting it but i couldnt place what hlep#adeline and eiland have been driving me insane lately. expect more of them. probably.#dont minf the last two guys. some concepts for future farms 😋 (pls mind them im crazy abt all my farmers even if they technically dont -#exist yet. pls ask abt them or smth pls im nroaml i can be nroma l i prommy)#fields of mistria#fom balor#sona#im gonna start tagging that i think.#fom eiland#fom adeline#fom elsie#fom farmer#my art#guys can i just say that im so happy that balor is silver n not gold cus otherwise i would have to confront a part of me im not proud of#we shouldnt talk abt it but like yeah jjust know i like his silver and his whole deal#have such a softspot n bias for characters who dont settle anywhere. who never lay down their roots or whatever. who keep their past secret#like oughh hes hitting so many marks#i like hawthorne a lot. hes more developed in my head. and also i like his dead look and hair bows. i have so many ideas abt him man it hur#i promised myself i wouldnt make a new save file til i reached y2 w rory but apperantly errols bday is cursed bc the game has frozen twice#sorry if you read all of these tags. go to my askbox w fom stuff or smth. ask abt my farmers plsplspls pl s jk haha unless. maybe even#gimme drawing reqs for fom in general. ok tyvm ly sorry for yapping. its what i do best
140 notes · View notes
Text
Tumblr media
My piece for @daily-teki's DTIYS !
130 notes · View notes
maudiemoods · 5 months ago
Text
Guys I'm sorry but I'm too lazy to crop these augrhh
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Ok ok ok, so have you seen those paintings where the characters are coming off the canvas? Yeah yeah you see where I'm going with this right
70 notes · View notes
meownotgood · 2 months ago
Text
I'm going back to bed the moment I post this but I've been having a super rough and stressful night... so for whatever reason I went back to read some of the kind asks I've received since I saved a lot... some since the first time I started writing... and I got so emotional and just began sobbing haha.... I can't believe how lucky I am...... I love writing so much.........
37 notes · View notes
milolunde · 1 month ago
Text
We all know Timmy is Wanda’s mama’s boy but we need to keep in mind he’s still Cosmo’s kid too and that Cosmo would love him just as vehemently as Wanda
Tumblr media
#fairly oddparents#not that anyone has portrayed him different#certainly not distance he loves Timmy he probably says it the most in the show and in fanon#but still- watching New Wish there felt like there was a disconnect with Cosmos character-like he wasn’t as well defined as he was in OG#that’s in part due to them toning him down from being an idiot plain and simple but I feel like it wasn’t fitted with something else it was#simply taken away#just to say he didn’t have as much of a presence to me in New Wish as Wanda did and I crave spinning Cosmo around in my brain#I want to see Poof being his Dad’s Boy yknow and I want to see cosmo doting and I want to see when he gets like. parental rage for the sake#of his kids#yknow? Yknow? part of him feeling detached in a new wish has translated into him not wanting to get as close to Hazel as he did Timmy-#to try and play it more like godparents are supposed to- just a presence for a couple months#but also because like. he got SO attached to Timmy and he’ll never regret it and he’d never do anything different#but idk. if it were me I wouldn’t have the capacity to go through losing my godkid again after becoming that attached#that’s not even mentioning that they don’t HAVE to be in hazel’s life the same way they were in Timmy’s because Timmy was going through#neglect and Hazel has loving family and friends all around her at all times- her blocks are mental#in that way cosmo and Wanda just have to do the Typical Godparent Job of aiding her- not becoming people she desperately needs in life#which also bleeds into why I think Peri was having such a. difficult time#godparents aren’t supposed to be attached the way his family was to Timmy and that how he learned it#but his first godkid is Not Easy and lends immediately to the issues Timmy was having where he HAS parents he HAS things (though . Timmy#was not rich and would sometimes not be fed… dev’s dad also forgets to feed him but dev is still able to eat you know)#and how he grew up with his parents as godparents and how he’s been taught are conflicting and it’s nature vs doing a good job quoteunquote#I didn’t mean to ramble so damn much in the tags I’m really sorry#told myself if I had more to say I’d write it down and post it later but I must be heard.
31 notes · View notes
veetowervaporwave · 7 months ago
Text
I feel like voxval are primed for a hanahaki au
Not the regular kind (don't care for that), but the one where the flowers are literally the manifestation of repressed feelings, and the longer you try to hold them in or suppress them, the worse it gets. And the only cure is to confess.
They're both so prideful they'd rather choke on their feelings than admit them.
61 notes · View notes
skibasyndrome · 2 months ago
Text
.
#not to be a broken lil man on main#but I was on the phone with my dad for 30 minutes just now (that's a lot for a phone call with him) and like.... damn. yeah. i do have one#parent who's not horrible huh#we talked a lot about my plans for the future...... which I only now told him bcs scary and bcs........ I never ever during my 25 years of#being alive got the impression from my parents that something like this would be an acceptable career choice or something they'd support#and I mean. my [redacted] of a mother is the best example for how. not alright it is with her that I'm doing something that's not very...#traditional for this family#but anyways. my dad was absolutely fucking lovely#to the point that I get getting teary eyed and felt my throat closing up cause. huh. i guess in his own way he does love me and believe in#he asked me to send him a link or a pdf of my first conference report because he wants to keep it somewhere 😭😭😭😭😭😭#I'm....... ouch. ouch ouch ouch ouch ouch#you know the ghosting I am really good at with tumblr chats (sorry guys. ilu. I just suck at communication)???? i'm also extremely good at#that with whatsapp chats and just. not calling my irl loved ones#so idk. hearing him say he understands and just wanted to make sure I wasn't upset with him and like. wanted to know if I was doing okay.#damn. okay. damn#idk#this was such a good talk and he was so suppertive and non-judgemental and I actually told him about my birthday and how my mother's call#upset me and he was like. yeah. same. and like... he's basically gone no contact with her as well as it turns out#idk. I really should give him more credit and like... I feel like there's so much shifting and change and development happening while I'm n#not there and sometimes it's hard to remember that he actually /could/ understand some things. just cause I've always been so used to not#sharing anything about myself because it wasn't safe when I was younger and... idk........ lots of emotions going on rn#so glad we talked though. so glad#simon.out.#if you read all this.... idk man.... sorry for oversharing but thanks for caring ig <3
34 notes · View notes
jakeperalta · 7 days ago
Text
often when something's on my mind when I'm sleeping I'll feel like I'm thinking about it for real except my sleeping brain is supplying the information so multiple times throughout the night I half woke up and my brain went "harris won" and I went "thank god" and then went back to sleep so waking up and checking the news was a horrible shock
21 notes · View notes
shiteatinggrin · 1 year ago
Text
you know when buffy summers had a knife to her head and her lover asked her if she had no weapons no friends what did she have left and she said me? yea that saved my life a little
290 notes · View notes
httpiastri · 8 months ago
Text
okay it's 3am…. but i just watched the campos vlog for the first time as a new campos girlie and i'm- 🥺🥺 sebas and chris's hand heart? hello??
oh and i could go on a full rant about how freaking cute pepe is but i shall try my best to refrain… it will only send me into a spiral and i will end up not sleeping……. so instead i'll just drop off this vid of his ADORABLE laughter and call it a day 🫡
(also this ^^ specifically @ that one anon who sent me an ask weeks ago about his laughter…….😭)
56 notes · View notes
sonknuxadow · 6 months ago
Text
Tumblr media
gaming buddies
43 notes · View notes
triglycercule · 3 months ago
Text
Tumblr media
small leisurely moments like these mean more than expected
ok hi triglycergang. it's AUGUST?!?!?! ugh,,,, anyways here's my like once a month art piece because i am a slow ass artist. the mtt are supposed to be chatting at a park during sunset!!! also new au just dropped
you wonder why killer dust and horror are wearing those DISGUSTING outfits??? you wonder where killer's soul is??? well it's all gone in this au which is called uhhh.
jk fashion au... wooooo!!
first things first to know: this au is NOT my idea. it was originally someone on twitter's idea to dress sans aus up in nanchatte seifuku but i think their account got deleted/banned. and i cant find the account because it was a japanese account and probably has some random username. so just remember that this isn't my idea but i guess my own twist on it. i really wish i could find the og creator,,,,
second thing to know: what the fuck nanchatte seifuku/jk (just kidding) fashion even is. here's the link to read for yourself: https://aesthetics.fandom.com/wiki/Nanchatte_Seifuku. yeah that's jk fashion. i really loved this au when i found it originally because i myself dress up in jk and also i just really love soft fluffy things like this. this au isn't gonna be angsty or particularly elaborate or anything i just wanted cute things and women in my murder time trio. also this isn't gyaru btw
third thing: uhh my inspirations for this??? well my main one that i really wanna focus on is that feeling of happy sentimental melancholy. you know like after you finish a really fun day hanging out with your friends and youre on the drive home and look back at how fun the day was? that's what i wanna encapsulate :3 also i think that the day to day school life is really cute and sweet and i wanna make more designs for the other aus so my trio can have more people to hang out with
well uhhh i think that's it?? mayhaps i shall begin drafting up other designs for the other aus. i wanna make little mini comics for this too like 4koma because i love those short yet sweet comics!!! should i tag this? i think i should tag this perchance. also extra mtt notes/full designs below became i love these three they're my daughters
Tumblr media
#tricule art#jk fashion au#i wonder how many lesbians i can fit into one au before it gets to be too much#i can't believe this is actually real LMAO. i really just slapped uniforms onto the mtt and called it a day#ok but fr this au is gonna help me figure out how to publish swapinverse so haha. i get fun and learning#this au is just a bunch of projection from me onto the sans aus. i make them hang out because i have nobody else to irl#UHHH i doubt people are gonna wanna draw this au themselves but if you want to.... go ahead..... i dont mind.......!!!!!#also i doubt people are gonna send asks but.... if they do..... 𝓱𝓮���....i'll answer alright#i have ideas for other designs teehee. ink design idea. cross design idea. epic idea. nightmare dream idea. soon the entire utmv will be jk#i think the first 4koma is gonna be mtt debating doors vs wheels. because i think they should#and then another 4koma about them sharing lunches and i'll do some cultural research there#and then another 4koma about killer's several cancellations#4koma about horror's personality switch up when alone#i just have so many ideas and love for this cute au#if people draw this/ask about it i think i will genuinely blow up#if people are weird with them i think i will drown myself. they are MINORS in HIGH SCHOOL. everyone has shorts under neath their skirts /sr#sorry for the human limbs fellas i couldn't be bothered to draw full skeleton bodies. just pretend theyre full skeletons#i really pushed myself with this one. i think???? idk this felt easier than it shouldve been#killer sans#dust sans#horror sans#murder time trio#bad sans gang#bad sanses#utmv#undertale au#sans au#undertale multiverse#utmv au#undertale
26 notes · View notes
necrotic-nephilim · 2 months ago
Note
Hello! New to comics and I don't really feel like the New-52 comics are for me and would really like to read and understand Pre-flashpoint and all the dark and good stuff there. Is there an order or starting point you would recommend? Thanks for your time, and I hope you have a great day!
hi! i'm so glad you want to get into comics! i'd love to help with some recs! since you're here, i'm going to assume you're a Batfamily fan and most of my recs will cater to that, but i will try to encompass a bit of everything to help you just understand some big moments and all this mess that is DC canon. adding a cut bc jesus this got long.
so your starting point for pre-Flashpoint is going to be Crisis on Infinite Earths. the TLDR of this event is: DC had a big multiverse in the 70s and early 80s that wasn't friendly to new readers. to try to push their titles more and become a proper competitor to Marvel, they created an in-universe storyline that nuked the multiverse and gave a solid entry point for new fans going forward. this is why you hear terms like Pre-Crisis and Post-Crisis. it refers to the comics canon before and after this event, in 1985. some characters had some big changes (for example: pre-Crisis Jason Todd was a circus kid whose parents were killed by Killer Croc) but most remained largely the same, just simplified. you don't *have* to start with Crisis on Infinite Earths if you don't want to. it's a *good* storyline, but it's a big one and a lot of big multiverse-scale stuff happens. so as long as you understand it as "big event that nuked DC's multiverse and gave the world a clean slate in 1985", then you've basically got the gist. also Barry Allen dies during it, but he comes back so don't worry about it.
in general, if DC has some big timeline/canon-altering event, they're going to call it a Crisis Event. the only Crisis Events that will matter to you, trying to get into pre-Flashpoint are
Crisis On Infinite Earths - the above, starts the Post-Crisis/pre-Flashpoint timeline
Zero Hour: Crisis In Time - an event in the 90s that sought to fix some of the kinks that the above Crisis caused, like fixing the origins of the Legion of Superheroes and other Golden/Silver Age characters, not *super* important tbh
Infinite Crisis - this was a big event that brought back some characters who got nuked by Crisis on Infinite Earths, unfucked Power Girl's backstory, and set the groundwork to bring back the multiverse. if you've heard "Superboy Prime punched a hole in reality and it brought back Jason Todd" yeah, this is the story where it happened
Final Crisis - a big event that was partly meta commentary but heroes fought Darkseid, Batman died for a hot second, it was all a big deal about evil winning and all that
Flashpoint - the event that nuked this timeline, a big storyline to do with Flash and the timeline that would result in the New-52 in 2011
are you confused yet? good embrace the confusion it's going to become second nature of a comic fan. you don't need to read these events as a beginner. you really don't i promise. they'll sound big and important, but besides Crisis On Infinite Earths and Flashpoint, the start and end of this era, the rest you can just kind of breeze by so long as you understand the big plot points like Batman dying or Superboy Prime punching reality. unless you really care about a character central to these stories, skip 'em for now.
now for any character, if they have a Year One comic? that is a very safe bet as a place to start. it is what it sounds like. Batman: Year One is going to be Bruce's first year as Batman. same as Green Arrow: Year One, Batgirl: Year One, etc. when in doubt, if there's a Year One, start with Year One. (note: for Superman, his "year one" type story is called Superman: Birthright and it is worth reading if you like Superman)
for Batman, i am holding you by the shoulders when i say this: people will tell you to read The Killing Joke. they're liars. do not listen to them. it's a bad story. you don't need it. do not let the Joker fanboys lie to you. people will also say Dark Knight Returns. don't listen to *them* either. i *like* DKR, i talk about it a lot here. it's not a good intro to Batman. it's an AU story, it's not canon, ignore it for now.
now where you *should* start with Batman, imo, is as followed
Batman: Year One - as said above, Year Ones are good, this is solid to start with
Batman: The Long Halloween - this is an iconic story and it's a followup to year One
Batman: Dark Legacy - the followup to Long Halloween, also a very good story
Batman: Hush - this story is a solid starter if you want to understand the general vibe of Gotham, the typical characters you see in the Batfamily, and a good Batman villain
once you've got the basics down, you *can* get into the big boy storylines like Batman: Knightfall and Batman: No Man's Land, but don't worry about those right now. they're long and complicated and shouldn't really be your starting point no matter how good they are.
other very good pre-Flashpoint comics that are easy to pick up and iconic storylines
Death of Superman - this is a long arc in the Superman run that if you collect in trades, goes Death of Superman, Funeral For A Friend, Reign of the Supermen, Return of Superman, Doomsday. it's long, but a very iconic storyline
Wonder Woman by George Perez - this the run that helped define modern Wonder Woman within the pre-Flashpoint era
JLA: Year One - if you want a good Justice League story where you get characters besides Batman, Wonder Woman, and Superman taking the shine, this is a great place to start
Green Arrow by Mike Grell - start with Green Arrow: The Longbow Hunters and then go into Green Arrow (1988). this has the darker, very 80s vibes that gets a bit gritty and very realistic with the issues it faces bc Green Arrow comics tend to be more rooted
The New Teen Titans by Marv Wolfman - this technically starts before pre-Flashpoint, don't worry about it it's fine. a good run for all of these characters, can get a little confusing, it is okay to be confused do not be afraid to google shit
so, some big stories out of the way i'm just. honestly going to run down the line of the major pre-Flashpoint Batfamily members and give you comic recs for them that you can start with. (besides Bruce obviously, bc well. see above)
Dick Grayson
NIghtwing: Year One
Robin: Year One
Nightwing (1995)
Tim Drake
Batman: A Lonely Place of Dying
Robin (1990)
Robin II: Joker's Wild
Robin III: Cry of the Huntress
Robin (1993)
Barbara Gordon
Batgirl: Year One
Birds of Prey (1999)
Jason Todd
Batman: The Cult (as Robin)
Batman: Death in the Family (as Robin)
Batman: Under The Red Hood
Red Hood: Lost Days
Cassandra Cain
Batgirl (2000)
Batman: No Man's Land
Jean-Paul Valley
Batman: Sword of Azrael
Batman: Knightfall
Stephanie Brown
Huntress/Spoiler: Blunt Trauma
Batgirl (2009)
Selina Kyle
Catwoman by Ed Brubaker
Helena Bertinelli
Batman/Huntress: Cry For Blood
Huntress: Year One
Birds of Prey: Manhunt
Damian Wayne
Batman & Robin (2009)
there are other very important pre-Flashpoint stories for all of these characters, but these are starting points more than anything. figure out what characters you're interested and go from there. understanding the universe at large helps, do not get me wrong. but at the end of the day, comics are a choose your own adventure of who you want to give a shit about. you're *never* going to read everything "important" and you're probably not going to understand everything. that's okay. don't treat it like a media you need to "complete" like a tv show or a movie, but more like an open world game where you decide what characters/teams/stories you like the most.
pre-Flashpoint covers a lot of ground. some stuff will be darker and grittier, some stuff will be more light-hearted. it will all be about what titles you pick up and what characters you decide you want to read about. you're obviously going to get a much more grounded storyline out of Green Arrow than you are say, a JLA comic. i prefer the more grounded, "street level" sorts of characters. (if you like gritty detective stories, i will be biased and highly recommend the Question (1987) just because. i love him okay.) but you might find you like sometimes more worldly and big scale. at the end of the day: don't force yourself to love a comic you're not enjoying, even if you like that character. you can put that shit down. sometimes, "important stories" are by shitty writers that you won't enjoy reading and you shouldn't make this hobby a chore. i don't care how "critically acclaimed" it is, you don't have to like it if it doesn't click for you. and on the flipside, a comic might be considered "bad" but you may enjoy it (a personal example: Robin III: Cry of the Huntress is considered a very weak comic. don't care. i love it anyway.) accept the cringe, have fun, and enjoy yourself at the end of the day. none of it will make sense anyway so just read what sounds cool to you.
this was all over the place and rambly, but i hope it helps at least a little! welcome to comics anon! if you or anyone else would like more character-specific recs, feel free to ask! if i don't know, i can at the very least hopefully point you in the right direction <3
23 notes · View notes
cardboardclownery · 5 months ago
Text
...hi guys :]
so uhh. folie a deux posting again-
this issss the first chapter i wrote for this!! cookie and i split the chapters among
ourselves specially based on their content and when pitching the idea for this one cookie said they felt sick while reading my idea so. i was chosen to write this one for his sake -v-
Tumblr media
SO!! sit back, relax, and enjoy the horrors my friend B]
(also sorry about the bracket bits at the start, we havent made placeholder town names yet or anything ;v;)
FOLIE À DEUX - CHAPTER 5, DRAFT 1
big tw for: graphic depictions of violence, cannibalism, dark themes(?? its freaky idk what youd call it)
I’ve once again found myself in the dark, suffocating woods surrounding the towns of Eastridge. Realistically, I could’ve stayed in [town name] for a bit longer– I had only just started living there before moving out again. Despite that, something in my head is telling me that I have to leave. Telling me how that place is too close to my old home, how easy it would be for Lankmann to find me there.
That voice has been leading me fairly well so far, so I have no reason to stop following him now.
I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t feeling a bit doubtful, though. I have no reason to believe he’s right or wrong, but a voice telling me to walk endlessly through the wilderness with unconfirmable reasoning isn’t exactly easy to believe. What other choice do I have, though? Stay put and see if it’s proven right, only to risk being put back into that hellish asylum?
No. That isn’t an option. We– I’m not going back there.
God, I’m hungry.
Still, I keep walking, ignoring how much my stomach growled. If I just make it to the nearest town soon, I can get something to eat. I think I still have enough money left to buy something. If not… hopefully they have a soup kitchen. I never imagined I’d end up in a situation where I would depend on something like that. I guess I never considered how people end up homeless or unable to feed themselves.
It feels odd calling myself a “person” now. I don’t know why, but it just seems… wrong in some way.
…I smell something. What is that smell? It’s visceral, almost like raw pork, and yet oddly sweet. I feel drool well up in my mouth and drip down my chin. I quickly wipe it off with my sleeve as I feel my heart begin to pound. Why am I so shaky? And why am I so much hungrier than before?
I look around for the source of the smell only to see a person walking not too far off in the distance. The trees make it hard to see them very well, but I can tell it’s a person. I know it doesn’t make sense for them to be the source of the smell, and yet something’s telling me that they are.
I find myself unable to look away from them. I don’t know why, but I just can’t.
Something about them makes me feel even hungrier.
Why am I hungrier? That’s a fucking person, what is wrong with me? Why can’t I just look away– I keep trying but I can’t get myself to look anywhere else but at them. My jaw falls open, letting more saliva spill out. They start walking farther away, I should walk away too.
But I can’t stop staring.
I can’t stop drooling.
I can’t…
I can’t…
stop…
…What...
What’s…going on..?
I can’t remember…how I got here…
I feel something in my mouth…I’m chewing something. It feels like steak, yet tastes more like ham. There’s so much of it, I feel it spilling out over my chin. It’s so warm… and wet… Is it covered in blood..? Was this even cooked at all? What the hell am I eating!?
I look down and–
And–
Fuck. Fuck, I–
I choke on what I was chewing, covering my eyes.
This isn’t fucking happening this isn’t happening–
I uncover my eyes and look down again. I see the same thing.
That person I saw. They’re right here, laying right in front of me. They won’t move, there’s a tear in their neck and they’re bleeding. They’re bleeding a lot.
Their leg’s bleeding too– there’s a deep gash in it. It looks as if an animal had torn it open with its teeth.
There’s blood on my hands. And my face, and my clothes.
There’s so much blood.
A sob pushed at my throat as I willed myself into looking at the person’s face. Another slipped out as I saw them staring back at me, making me look away again. I can’t bear looking at them like this. I can’t believe they’re even alive, let alone conscious.
It would’ve been so much easier if it wasn’t…
…What do you mean, “it?”
They aren’t an “it,” that– that’s a person that’s not–
I shake my head and look back down at its– their leg. The wound left in it is so deep, almost reaching the bone. For some reason, when I looked at this…
When I looked… I felt so, so hungry.
I swallow what remained in my mouth. It tastes… good.
Why does it… taste good..?
Without thinking, I lean down, hold the person’s leg in place and tear off another hunk of flesh with my teeth. The person doesn’t even resist or scream. It just lays there, whimpering in pain.
Its meat tastes so, so good.
I quickly chew up the viscera between my teeth and gulp it down along with the blood it was drenched in. I lick my lips to take in the mess on my face. It was oddly savory, even sweet. I tore off another chunk from its leg.
“I…I-I’m so…I’m sor…ry…” I choked out between chews. “I’m so… so, sorry…”
I swallowed down the mush in my mouth before croaking out another “sorry.” I couldn’t stop repeating as I ate, “sorry,” “sorry,” “I’m sorry,” as if it would do anything. It didn’t take long to notice the person stop responding. It finally died off as I sobbed pointless apologies, devouring what was left of its leg.
My sobs became incomprehensible blubbering after this. I couldn’t bring myself to eat anymore. I just buried my head in my hands, muffling the nonsense tumbling from my throat.
…It’s so odd.
In less than a week, I’ve transformed from a deer in headlights into a predator– a beast perhaps even more frightening than the one I had been running from all this time.
I can’t remember exactly how we- I got rid of the body. I just remember panicking, dragging the corpse for hours without thinking. I can’t remember where it is now. I think I stepped on something. Just above my ankle, there’s a bloody gash that must’ve been there for a while now. It’s from a bear trap I think. I probably shouldn’t be walking with a wound like that in my leg. I probably shouldn’t be able to walk with that in my leg. It stings, but it doesn’t hurt as much as it should, I don’t think.
I’m still damp from washing in a river. I think it was a river. It might’ve been a lake, actually. I can’t really remember that, either. I just know I was covered in blood, then went somewhere that had water and left without any blood on me. I couldn’t get the stains off of my clothes, though.
Hopefully no one noticed.
I’m in an apartment now– a small, run-down one, but an apartment. I’ll be stuck living here for a while so I need to get used to it. I’ve been staring at the same spot on the beige, hole-filled wall for a few minutes now, standing just in front of the door leading outside. My bag is lying next to me, having been dropped just after walking inside and closing the door.
I should go to bed.
I should unpack.
I should take a proper shower.
I should turn myself in to the police.
I should
I
don’t
I don’t. Know.
What do I do now?
Where do I go from here?
What… what do I do..?
I… I killed someone… I can’t even remember where they are now…
I just… hid them… like it was nothing and walked away.
I ate their fucking leg.
Why… why did I… Why…
Why…
I…
Can’t… breathe…
I fall backwards against the door. I can’t breathe. I choke on nothing. I can’t stop shaking.
My eyes start to sting from the tears forming in them. My fingers curl against the floor. My nails dig into it as they do.
Inhuman sounds bubble in my throat.
I feel something heavy wrap around me but nothing is there.
It becomes easier to breathe somehow.
The invisible weight around me grows heavier, pushing me down to the floor.
I curl into myself, lurching with each choked sob of a breath. Despite there being no source of it in the room, I swear I can hear music.
I really have lost it, haven’t I.
39 notes · View notes