#bruce😭😭

[demonicsuffrage]

It's so wild when you think about how much of a shift the batkids had after they were adopted by Bruce, because NONE had a sibling and were like-

Dick, who accidentally walked into Tim's room, spotting the robin shrine he has there:

Tim: ...I can explain

Dick, walking out: Nevermind! It's my fault for wishing for siblings when I was a kid

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jason: Who the hell tweeted 'skibidi toilet rizz' 56 times from my twitter?!

Tim, salty about the titans tower incident, laptop in hand still open to Jason's twitter account:

Jason:

Jason: I wish Bruce had adopted a puppy instead of you.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Damian, fuming after Bruce got them a shared hotel room on a vacation: I miss the days when I was an only child

Tim: Didn't your mom make like two thousand clones of you?

Damian: I would've preferred sharing my inheritances with all 2000 of them instead of you

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Dick, entering his room at the manor after a patrol and spotting Duke on his bed and immediately shrieking: BRUCE, THERE'S A RANDOM KID IN MY ROOM

Bruce: Dick, this is your newest brother, Duke

Dick: And you gave him my room?!

Duke: Wow, the colour scheme in here is so 80s

Dick: Consider me and you estranged from now on

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Bruce: Jason, unblock your brother, he is currently crying in the living room because of it.

Jason, had blocked Dick after the thirst trap Dick posted got over 100k views on tiktok and now everyone and their sibling was asking for Dick's number: What brother? I identify as an only child.

[batbabydamian]

Obsessed with little Lima Bean Baby Dami. I feel like Bruce would pass out from cuteness if he witnessed his child looking like that.

Talia should send Damian's baby pics to Bruce lol

[fanaticalthings]

the muskification of twitter except it's lex luthor instead of elon lol

<- Prev Masterlist Next ->

[ditzybat]

Bruce in a stretched out Nightwing suit:

Tim: Bruce Thomas Wayne, take that shit off NOW! Your bones are CREAKING trying to replicate Dick’s flips

Bruce: Bludhaven needs Nightwing

Tim: The seams are ripping on that costume, get out and let me put the stupid suit on, you don’t have the ass to be Nightwing

Bruce: I’ll have you know I was named sexiest man alive for three years straight! My ass is perfectly fine!

[sophiasrant]

thinking about a mattpatt game theory style video about the identity of batman in the dc universe.

"We have to assume that Batman makes a certain amount of money to be able to have all of his gear and things like the batmobile. So let's look at the number of millionaires and billionaires that live within Gotham city. From here we can safely rule out all women and the men below five foot eight as Batman is agreed upon as 'fairly tall.' Now we look at ages and knock out people above 50 and below 30 based on how long Batman has been on the job. This leaves a manageable number of people on our list. Some can be knocked off the list manually, like Bruce Wayne. *insert poorly edited picture of Brucie in a costume Batman mask.* We can also successfully scratch out the names of people who have been in the same room as Batman. Then we look at the realistic schedules of the people left...and. No one. Not a single person was left on the list. Of course this list wasn't perfect, but you'd think we'd get at least one candidate. But the best the list got us was Brucie Wayne which... I don't even have to tell you why that's incorrect. Batman's identity remains a mystery but uh I guess that's the point."

[gotham-snark]

Batman and Robin 2023 13- an emotional goodbye from the current creative team 🫡

[phibsies]

Swap AU BroZone :]

gonna put the ref in this post too :3

rambles under cut ^_^

it was mentioned in a previous post, but in my swap au, branch’s brothers don’t split apart :] i mainly decided this for funsies tbh, i just really liked the idea of them staying. these are also a lil old ? but i plan to draw more interactions and such. i have so much planned for this silly swap honestly :’3

[writeyourdarlings]

black cat girlfriend & golden retriever boyfriend

[wickedbats]

Dick and Jason would be the type to bury a body if Damian accidentally killed someone. Dick saying ‘my sweet boy, you didn’t mean it’ and Jason going ‘fucker deserved it anyway’.

[puffinpatrol]

Hello Superwonderbat, you saved my life or something

[temperamentalaquarius]

A lotta y'all be writing Dick as this terminally lonely man with no friends like 3/4s of the DCU isn't fighting over who gets to be his emergency contact

[ynbabe]

OH SHIT OH SHIT that last part jsjsjsjs

Barry being super sunshiny and sometimes rambles and the team think it’s a lot sometimes meanwhile reader just finds it so cute

Random Rambling

——

Pairing: [The Flash] Barry A. x reader

Pronouns: he/him

Fandom: DC/Justice League

Quote: “Punk originated from the 1500's. They called prostitutes that.”

Disclaimer: Insulting Bruce. Spoiler to the book When You Are Engulfed in Flames. More of just a short little story. Sorry, this might not be fully what you asked for.

Master list

Word count: 630

——

Y/n absentmindedly scrolled through his phone, paying no mind to the meeting at hand. His brain was completely trained to the device in his hands. Good thing for him, the meeting wasn’t that important.

Hal, who was seated next to the hero, looked over his shoulder; wondering what had the man so captivated. “Whatcha lookin’ at?”

Y/n glanced at Hal, then back at his phone. “Uh,...” He squinted eyes as he read the screen. “‘Man Sent to Mental Institution for Claiming That His Mother’s Ashes Were Trying to Speak to Him’.” Y/n read aloud.

Hal was speechless. Now it was Barry’s turn to look over y/n’s shoulder. He read the title of the article for himself, and suddenly he gasped. “Oh! That, uh-, that reminds me of a book I’m reading.” He said excitedly.

The teams groaned, Hal even let out a fake sob. Y/n just turned to him.

“Yeah, this dude bought his boyfriend a birthday gift and it was a skeleton, because that’s what the guy wanted for some reason. The dude thought his boyfriend would put it in his art studio, but he put it in their shared room!” Flash rambled.

“Oh?” Y/n said, smiling.

“Yeah, and it slowly started creeping the dude out, and he started hearing the skeleton talk to him. Saying, ‘you are going to die’, or something like that/ So the dude slowly started to go crazy, begging the skeleton to at least change the sentence. He was dusting it one day while begging it to quit saying that, and the skeleton stopped and said ‘you will be dead… someday’.” The hero finished up.

Y/n chuckled, “I mean you gotta start somewhere.”

“That’s what he said after!” Flash yelled. “It’s a really good book. I love it.”

“What’s the name?” Y/n asked.

“When You Are Engulfed in Flames. If you want, I can lend it to you.”

“Sure.” Y/n said, looking back at his phone.

When Barry looked back at his team, they were all staring at them. “Done with your book club meeting?” Cyborg meeting.

“Ye-” Barry was cut off by y/n again.

Y/n turned his phone to the man. “Is this the book?” He asked.

Oliver groaned, hitting his head on the table and just laying there. Bruce’s head was buried in his hands. Clark just waited. Diana just tried to talk through the conversation.

Barry’s expression lit up. “Yeah! Isn’t the cover so cool?” He asked, excited.

“It is.”

“That’s actually an old painting from way back when.” Barry joked.

“Really?” Y/n asked.

“I’m pretty sure!”

Y/n looked back at the book covered and smiled. “Huh. You learn something new everyday.

“Not how to shut up, that’s for sure.” Bruce mumbled.

“Shut the fuck up, spoiled rich punk.” Y/n said back,

“Punk originated from the 1500's. They called prostitutes that.” Barry pointed out.

“Bruce, are you a prostitute?” Y/n asked.

Barry nodded, smiling. “Now it means someone who is worthless or unimportant.”

“Bruce, are you worthless or unimportant?”

“No.”

“…. Whatever gets your punk ass asleep, I guess…” Y/n said. Bruce glared at y/n while y/n just stared at him.

“I’m gonna kill you.” Bruce said.

“If you can’t kill someone for hurting your kid you definitely aren't gonna kill me.”

“Foul!” Hal said, laughing. “He does not deserve to get attacked so hard!”

——

[mikeluciraphgabe]

Part one masterpost

[waveoftheocean]

clark gets smaller. his glasses get bigger (⌐⎚⩊⎚)✧

(comments from this post! ty y'all for making me think abt clark's humongous glasses 💕)

[frogaroundandfindout]

Do you think dick had to retire any moves once he became Nightwing because now that he has the strength and weight of an adult they’re just deadly to his opponents now no matter how much he tries to modify them?

When he was 10 and launching himself at a man’s throat it was one thing, now it’s another entirely.

[ochibrochi]

metropolis nights 🌙 (kal-el ver. under the cut) original "template" by @/K0TTERl