#bruce wtf man

[batbaffle]

A LOBOTOMY

[im-a-lil-bitch-boi]

if i was a Gotham Villain/Rouge:

Me: Ok so the gasolime is sert in place, LETS WATCH THIS BITCH BURN >:D

Batman and Robin(Dick): *arrives to stop me*

Me: oh fu- . . . why does the child not have ANY pamts on?!?!?!?! WHERES THE ARMOR?!?!?! ARE YOU DEPENDIN ON US TO NOT ATTACK A CHILD?!?!?! IK I WOUPDNT BUT LIKE- THE JOKER WOULD?!?!?! HE HAS BEFORE ACTUALLY, HELL THE JOKER HAS ATTACKED ME BEFORE BC I SAID IM NOT A FAN OF CLOWNS HELLO???

Batman and Robin: *stunned silence*

Me: GO BACK AND GIVE THAT CHILD PANTS AND ARMOR JESUS FUCKIN CHRIST! NOW YA GOT ME SWEARIN ON A DEAD MAN

[neptunezo]

superbat (clark x bruce) to superbat (tim x kon) to superbat (damian x jon) pipeline is so real

[emo-batboy]

I'm sorry but your taste in Bruce Wayne is horrible. None of those guys in the pictures have what it takes to be a Bruce Wayne. They can be a Robin or something but they're so young. They're also all so ... Well I know Bruce is white but your picks are like obnoxiously white looks wise I'm really sorry I don't know how to describe it but you picked the a Bruce Wayne so bad I had to say it in some way shape or form. Wishing better taste upon you

Do you…do you not know about Matt Reeves’ The Batman?

[shahrwrites]

I’m not reading zdarsky’s run, but WTF IS GOING ON IN THAT MAD HOUSE?????

[undertheredhood]

jason todd randomly trauma dumps on his family without warning while laughing his ass off and they're all left wondering how they're supposed to respond because of what he just revealed was genuinely horrifying.

(btw, this is in reference to this post)

[phantomskeep]

I woke up and chose art today

Design and scene is from the 5th chapter of my DCxDP Fic - basically where Danny becomes a thief to snag various ghostly artifacts. Hoping to have the next chapter out soon :)

Close-up and non-edited pics under the pagebreak VVV

anatomy is gross and I refuse to accept it into any art of mine B)

[spidergrotto]

in a happier universe, peter's main concern right now would be trying not to seem like a complete loser in front of the avengers, he throws whatever object is closest at tony when he mentions peters (limited edition) lego sets, tries to watch the news whenever someone is around, and pretends he has no interest in the new star wars when he’s at the tower.

it takes him a few months but he slowly realizes that the avengers might be even worse than he is, he catches bucky wandering around eating dry cereal out of the box and chugging a glass of milk moments after, tony has hyper fixated on gravity falls and somehow dragged both peter and wanda into it, steve and sam have well over a hundred hours on the sims, and movie night has turned into a roblox fashion famous competition ( natasha and bruce keep winning. )

they get less and less intimidating over time and peter feels more and more comfortable around them.

[jollyhaunt]

need more of bruce in his twunk era circa. 1970s

[junespriince]

Aita?

Boss won't fire me, but is actively trying to kill me more than the speed force is.

Me, the Flash (29yo m) have been not only forced by my boss, Buttman(old as dirt, m) to keep the job my uncle had but to also expect me to not slack in my other jobs outside of this one.

I've lost so much in this unfortunate, and down right inhumane treatment because I'm a speedster and "balance needs to be kept, the justice league needs a speedster, Flash. It's basics universe lore that was given to you as a child." Like, I know jackass, you made me memorize it if I wanted to go on young justice league missions, a school inside of child labor this man was a monster then as he is now.

He won't take the time to learn I'm not like my uncle before me, he treats me like I'm a child because me and Cy, (28, m) are the youngest in the league right now!

I have loss my time dealing with this bullshit, my job before I moved in with my hubby I had to moved to my boss terf because it's cheaper (I wonder why.), my patience for putting up this clearly unhealthy and unjust treatment towards me (dating your boss son is technically a bad business practices, BUT I WASN'T WORKING FOR HIM TO BEGIN WITH, I was dating my old boss, duh, an even horrible practice but I like my men in power what can I say.), and my temper for dealing with a horrible and stubborn man, broadman I know you're reading this, this is why you have a hard time connecting with your kids, if i was your kid I'd runaway too with my handsome best friend.

Anyways, today he had a mission that was stupid. His plans got me almost killed and when I brought it up to him, he had the nerve to say to me "well if you stopped talking on your phone during the debrief, you would have survived it better." First of all, I listen and follow his plan to the T, all my i's were dotted and my t's were crossed, his plan just sucked and I know knew it did because he told auntie Wonder Woman about it and agreed it sucked, and also I WAS TEXTING YOUR SON MY HUBBY THAT I WAS GONNA BE LATE FOR OUR ANNIVERSARY YOU TRIED TO KILL ME ON! So I let him have it. I told him this: "I don't understand this beef we have, it's been years and you were there for our wedding happy to see him happy, so why do you hate me? It's not for any reason I hate you for. You fired your son took HIS Mantle away, fight him over a little thing what wasn't a big deal at the time to him getting angry you replaced him with another kid entirely because you suck at communicating he assumes he failed you somewhere down the line after years of undermining him, you and fans from that comic issue got side kid killed, that started ANOTHER riff because you didn't tell him and when he found out he tried to kill the joker which you stopped and saved the man who murdered your, at the time, youngest child while all you did was mope around and felt sorry for yourself, add another year of shit before now finally fixing your relationship with him and all you got on me is being there for your son and not being the most nicest to you. Grow up."

A few of our teammates told me I was an asshole for saying that to him, Wonder Woman and Green Arrow gave me a pat on the back and some lunch, and when I told this to my husband after finally getting back barely to make up for a crappy anniversary that I probably shouldn't have gotten onto him like that, but I don't see it.

So, reddit, with an unbiased option (I have seen the merch and ao3 tags, I know how much you freaks love this man. Or Superman, which sir, he dated your wife to get back at you years ago the fuck you took up for him for? Get a back bone.) am I the asshole?

Edit: I just think bastardman is homophobic.

Batman's edit: I'm not homophobic, my son could have done better than you is all.

Edit, edit: this is why Selina leaves you at the alter.

Batman's edit edit: this is why your parents beat you.

Edit edit edit: I'd tell you to suck my dick, but I don't want to fuel the freaks of ao3 to write us more, would rather have Kyle kiss me before this.

Batman 4x edit: come to the e meeting room. Now.

Edit 4x: fuck off old man, you can't tell me what to do.

Oracle: children, in my office, now.

Batman: yes ma'am...

Wally: yes ma'am...

[batbaffle]

he couldve just said "strange" out loud and nobody wouldve found it suspicious in the slightest. "i never think" is such an insane response for him to give

[ruedhood]

i heard from the Streets (my feed) that Batman is gonna wear Nightwing's suit????? in nightwing's comic run???????

FIRST OF ALL, good luck trying to fool the world that somehow nightwing gained like 50 pounds of pure muscle in the span of a week. he will look like he got dipped in the lazarus pit jason style.

SECOND OF ALL, the whole point of nightwing is dick made his own identity, and someone else wearing it defeats his whole purpose. wtf man

[tiredofsatansbullshit]

common question asked after interacting with jason todd

[puppetmaster13u]

@phoenixcatch7

I have a very important question about the Possessed Doll Au Does Alfred also have a doll or do the Justice League see this old man who looks human scolding the most terrifying member of their group- and it's somehow working

[atalante241]

Shout out to Bruce Wayne, the character that writers love to make a giant ass and not in the fun “that’s a fun and interesting character trait” way but instead in the “he beats the shit out of his kids because plot reasons” way

[leoleolovesdc]

I know I'm an asshole and no one is forced to know anything, but I heavily judge everyone who says they like Batman but "don't know a lot about the batfamily". Bitch, the batfamily is the only single interesting thing about Batman

Also, who do you think you are to not know about them? I thought that was basic knowledge to the human existence