#anya deserved so much better man.

[drvortigern]

[chainsawctopus]

You, me, and our loss of autonomy.

[insomniac-dormouse]

Silly goofy game about mouthwash!

[rnaeborowski]

ugh i have so many thoughts rn

[fl0ralsxgar]

5.8 hrs on mouthwashing, all achievements, and i got everything you could get with the points... What do i do now.

Actually most of the ending was just a constant slap in the face that Daisukes gone like ☹️

Which i already knew there would be all those slaps from watching so many gameplays but it just felt different being the one playing it. Also the last thing he really got to say being 'im sorry i messed up' oh baby ☹️ i love him sm it hurts my heart. On a lighter note, more sillies (i love that he wears rings lmao)

Anyways au where everyones ok and curly stopped yimpy and i give daisuke and anya a big fat smooch on the cheek (im coping)

[noperopesaredope]

I love him but also yeah pretty much

i hate him bro DO SOMETHING

[clown-paws]

i want to talk about the mouthwashing fandom because... jesus christ. warning for talk of assault and dehumanisation.

-

yeah, curly was a bystander to anya's assault and certainly made a mistake by not acting sooner, but are you normal about him post-crash and disabled? are you treating him as a person, or just a funny meat man, or a fucking dog? youtubers use post-crash curly in their thumbnails as the horror, instead of the actual villian of the game... i wonder why.

yeah, you hate jimmy and your glad he's dead, and you make funny versions of his name, but are you normal about anya's assault and pregnancy? are you normal about whether people depict her in AUs as getting an abortion, or miscarriage, or giving birth? yeah, you want to fuck up all rapists of the world, but do you want to be there for the victims and uplift them and spread awareness?

additionally, do you know to block the people who don't share your views and upset you about these themes? when somebody talks about jimmy as a character openly and recognises that hes a very well-written character, or like him as such, are you sending them death threats and actively upsetting yourself over it?

also, "im so sorry you had to draw/write/show jimbo!!!11!!1!" my guy its their... post? the comments were funny for a little bit, but its EVERY OTHER comment under amazing mouthwashing artwork.

and the hate jimmy cosplayers recieve. holy fuck. people cosplay villians all the time, it doesnt make somebody immoral/disgusting to cosplay him and act out scenes as him. i feel it's hypocritical to thirst over a depiction of your favourite childhood disney villian, yet comment "🤢🤢" under one of jimmy.

listen, of course jimmy is an asshole, of course curly [and swansea, really] should have acted sooner, of course anya and daisuke deserved so much better. but can we please, PLEASE have more mature conversations about this story, these intricate characters?

that's my opinion. i love this game a lot.

[mind-intheclouds342]

Do it for them - Co-captain reader x Curly

Previous - Part 9 - Next

You banged on the door of the room where that man was locked up, waking him up abruptly.

"Let's talk"

Jimmy: "I thought visiting hours were over."

He complained, turning around to turn his back to the door.

"Don't try to be funny with me, Jimmy. What the hell did we do to deserve so much hate from you?"

Jimmy: "Don't play innocent, you know very well what you did!"

"Honestly, I have no idea! That's why I'm asking you!"

Jimmy: "Of course, because I was always the shadow of your dear husband. You never turned to look at me again after you got with him, you never smiled at me like you did with him, you didn't even speak to me. It was as if I were invisible to you!"

"Oh, of course I was looking at you!"

Jimmy: "Then why didn't you ever tell me anything?!"

He shouted that, getting up from his bed to head towards the glass that separated them, watching your face to see you when you replied.

"BECAUSE I'VE ALWAYS HATED YOU!"

You screamed with all your lungs, to the point of making your throat hurt.

"You always brought trouble to Curly! He was always so naive, a sucker for approval, of being the good guy in the story, of not letting anyone down! That's why he never abandoned you! I knew better that's why i stopped talking with you! Because you were and are a piece of shit!" 

Jimmy: "Oh, but you talk as if I were the only fucked up one in the story."

"Yes! I admit it! I was also a mess when I met Curly, but I did something, I was able to see beyond that mess I was, he showed me that I could improve, he gave me opportunities that I knew how to take advantage of and become a better person! In someone who could make his mother proud instead of making her cry because she didn't know if he was coming home or not!"

There was a silence when you finished saying that, until you saw him smirk, that reaction you didn't like at all.

Jimmy: "You're right, Curly loves to please, you should know that very well."

"Ugh, for the love of God, I don't know why I try to reason with you, it's impossible."

Jimmy: "But you were the only one who refused to give in to make me happy."

You opened your eyes wide upon hearing that, turning again to the man who still wore that smug smile.

Jimmy: "Just as beautiful and messed up as I am, I thought you would understand me, but then you became a good girl, yet I still hoped you would look at me..."

"Shut up-"

Jimmy: "Oh, and the damn way Curly talked about you, how incredible you are, so kind, hardworking, so beautiful."

"I tell you to shut up-"

Jimmy: "Those lovely moles in the center of your chest that look like a constellation"

"He wouldn't talk about those things with you!"

Jimmy: "I saw it myself"

You felt like you were going to puke at that moment, you didn't want to believe that he had really done something like that to you while you were unconscious, you didn't want your suspicions to be confirmed, you refused to believe it.

"Liar. Anya wouldn't leave me alone, she would lock the nursery door-" 

Jimmy: "Yes, yes, she did that, it was a pain in the ass. Every night when she went to sleep, she locked the nursery with that code that only Curly and she knew... But that place wasn't closed while someone was inside."

"She wouldn't let you get close to me!"

Jimmy: "They were so sweet, Anya staying by your side saying she had to make sure all your signs were okay, and when she left, she would ask Swansea if he could keep an eye on you. But he was so depressed that he didn't dare to stay with you for long, so... I took his place to make sure you were okay."

"In front of Curly..."

You murmured at having to imagine the scene your husband had to witness without being able to do anything about it other than watch.

Jimmy: "That was the funniest thing"

You hugged tightly, feeling a horrible tingling all over your body, as if you were dirty.

Jimmy: "Swansea had no idea about anything, Anya didn't want to talk about it with anyone else. Thanks to her silence, I was able to finally look at that body that you always hide from me, thanks to Swansea's stupidity and feeling sad for his little captain, feeling all guilty and shit."

Swansea: "What did he just say..." 

You turned to see Swansea at the end of the hallway, carrying Jimmy's rations, holding an axe firmly in the other hand; he had managed to hear everything.

"Swansea-"

Swansea: "Open the door, captain"

"Listen - it's not worth it, do you have any idea what they'll do to you if they find out you hurt someone from the crew? Please, I don't want them to lock you up." 

You said immediately, positioning yourself in front of him, trying to get him to see you, but his eyes were glued to the door where he could see Jimmy's face.

Swansea: "How are they going to know? Let's say it was an accident. Open the door!"

You wanted to keep reasoning with him, but you couldn't deny that you also wished he would face consequences for his actions.

You took the axe from his hands, making him look at you annoyed.

"I won't take the risk of you killing him."

Those were your last words before opening the door, Swansea didn't take much more than a few seconds to fully open the door, step inside, and throw himself at Jimmy.

You could hear the sound of the blows, the insults, and the screams.

You stood at the door wide open, axe in hand, watching as the blood spread across the floor with each blow Swansea dealt.

You watched Jimmy and tilted your head, waiting for him to defend himself.

You wouldn't hesitate to cut off his hands if he touched Swansea.

[glitterponyshark]

thinking about mouth washing SPOILERS UNDER CUT

after watching manlybadasshero play mouthwashing, i’ve come to say that jimmy can suck a fat dick and curly and anya are end game (even though he didn’t protect her from jimmy, he still was trying to help in some sort of way)

Daisuke and anya are sweet souls that didn’t deserve to die to some narcissistic asshole who thought he could “fix” everything, when in reality, he’s root that caused all the problems to happen in the first place.

and don’t even get me started on the perspectives differences between curly and jimmy, the way he sees the crew as “nurse” who is too poor to go back to school (anya), old man that gonna croak before he knows it (Swansea), and young “spoiled brat” who can just live off of mommy’s and daddy’s money (daisuke).

he views everyone as a problem while he’s the one that’s supposed to be able to fix all of them. he literally doesn’t even see them and people with emotions, just problems he HAS to fix

his delusions especially pissed me off, at the end of the game it shows the rest of the crew sitting around the table, smiling at him, calling him a friend and celebrating. but when you get to another perspective, birds eye, you see that all of them are dead and slumped over showcasing that even in his delusions, he still sees himself as the “hero”

but curly on the other hand, god do i love curly, you can just SEE the difference in his perspective. the way he talks to anya and the rest of the crew is just beautiful, he see anya as an actual person with feelings, someone who you can have deep conversations with and never wanna stop. then swansea and daisuke, he knows swansea can be harsh and cold sometimes, but he saw how daisuke was somewhat breaking that down.

GOD HIS PERSPECTIVE IS JUST MY FAVORITE SO MUCH JUST a CAUSE YOU CAN SEE HOW MUCH HE TREATS THE CREW BETTER THAN JIMMY

and then here comes jimmy, mr “everything has to happen my way” causing the ship to crash, pretty much almost killing curly, and blaming curly about the crash to try and get the crew to turn on him cause he envy’s how curly is so well liked. and then indirectly causing everyone’s deaths (including also raping anya, that part made my gut drop to my ass dude)

all in all, i fucking hate jimmy, kill your self next time

[profound-bouquetbird]

Mouthwashing characters but rated based on how much I wanna date them

Anya she deserves better than me so she's not on the list, I wouldn't put her through that. She's not in this, she's petting kittens elsewhere on a comfy couch and a warm blanket

Absolutely bottom last, Jimmy, obviously. Jimothy. I'd kill him the moment I saw him

Curly didn't do shit. I need a man that does shit. At least he's cute. But he didn't beat the shit out of Jimmy so points off for that

Daisuke, cute, better that the other two but he's baby to me. Like I don't want to date him, I want to make sure he's in bed by 9pm. I'd read him a bedtime story but because there are no books on the shuttle I'm just listing off mouthwash ingredients every night

Swansea. Man of my dreams. Would beat the shit out of Jimbo w/ me. I think he's married but I can live with that. Puts Daisuke in bed by 9pm with me

Preach it sister/bro/pardner ✊

[dykedvonte]

RE: Your post on the AU of Jimmy being in the cockpit rather than Curly.

I think that Curly would think that Jimmy was reaping what he had sown, but in a way would feel a twisted sense of relief that Jimmy was brought down by his own actions rather than Curly himself having to be the "executioner" in the situation, so to speak.

With "taking responsibility" and the fix-it mentality that he and Jimmy share being the overarching theme, compounded with Jimmy flat out insinuating that all of his crimes on the Tulpar will be "Curly's tragedy" in that one scene, I think Curly would almost find comfort in the irony that the choice was forcibly taken away from him. Which in itself is messed up, but it might be a bit cathartic. There's an interesting polarizing dynamic within Curly's relationship to his own responsibility in that it's his greatest burden and the thing he, too, avoids the most.

I don't think Curly would find any relief in this actually. While Curly didn't/doesn't like the responsibility he had, he defiantly doesn't avoid it, he just goes about it in a weird way.

A thing I noticed is that its less about taking responsibility with Curly and really what that responsibility meant objectively and then subjectively to Curly. The leniency that he applies to Jimmy also applies a bit to the others as well. He thinks his responsibility is more towards keeping the peace and things in order more than dolling out punishment. He has even more choices to make and responsibilities as he literally has to make sure they survive/ration long enough to be saved. Or figure out how to save them himself. The correct issue with Curly and responsibility is the prioritization in his head. He sees the big picture and prioritizes that. He doesn't notice the little things that he should but it's not a active dismissal, perhaps not even conscious despite how dismissive he seemed. He takes too much responsibility, espcially in regards to Jimmy, and I think this situation is when he realizes that is also a bad thing as he can't "fix" all of his wrongs.

I think he'd regret not making a choice, because in the end this happened because he wouldn't directly choose who to comfort and help. He tried to help both and ended up doing nothing for either and letting Jimmy fuck them all over. In this scenario/au he's thinking about all the times he let Jimmy inadvertently make his choice, and how he chose to let it happen. He regrets all of it and would be so bitter that he was giving his choice up for so long. He chose wrong and it affected everyone. The only thing he'd find cathartic is the fucked up truth it will never happen again, not with Jimmy at least.

But he's not happy he's getting joy from that. I think it's a point not a single character other than Jimmy is depicted at deriving joy from another's pain. Even Swansea is being more sarcastic when he cheers on Curly about crashing the ship and ending his sobriety. He's happy Jimmy was forced to take responsibility, but this? He wanted him to learn a lesson and do something with himself, this is hollow in a way it's just embittering. Jimmy didn't get what he wanted, he can be happy about that but no one else did. This isn't justice or closure for Anya, he's stuck in a place he was so desperate to leave with even more pressure on his shoulders. Daisuke is just a kid and Swansea doesn't deserve this after all his year making himself a better man.

Like in his sections, Curly is preoccupied thinking about all the responsibilities he has, taking on things he shouldn't have to and trying to keep the peace when he doesn't have peace in his own mind.

[yandere-daydreams]

Title: Third Party.

Pairing: YandereLoid x Reader x Yandere!Yor (Spy x Family).

Word Count: 1.5k.

TW: Post-Reveal AU, Reader Is Sketchy, Implied Murder/Violence, Mentions of Blood, and Cheating (?).

“Are you sure you have to leave?”

You let the words ebb into a lazy drawl, dragging your fingertips down the length of his spine as you nuzzled into his back. Loid’s skin was a patchwork of scars, no more pleasant to run your hands over than dulled sea glass or sandpaper, but you did your best to savor it, to let your lips ghost over a blossoming field of discolored bruises before your attention rose higher – to the rows of fresh nail-marks that’d been carved from his shoulder to the middle of his back. Most of his injuries had been left by his patients, permanent testaments to his dedication to his work, but those scratches had been your doing. A little present for the kindhearted wife he was going home to, sooner or later.

The thought filled you with a smoldering sort of zeal, quick to gnaw at your better judgment and infest the empty void where your guilt should’ve been. You swallowed down your excitement, taking instead to slotting yourself against him as if you weren't praying for him to leave, as if you didn't have anything better to do than press your cheek against the nape of his neck, string your arms over his shoulders, and beg him to stay. “We never get to see each other, anymore. I miss you so much when we’re not together – it feels like someone’s trying to carve my heart out of my chest.”

Sappy, overly sentimental, almost embarrassingly aggrandizing towards the object of your affection. The type of praise that’d only appeal to a man who thought himself enough deserve not just his wife to confide in during the day, but a lover who would spend their nights at his side in faded hotel rooms, between sheets that’d seen better days. This one was nicer than most – the sheets unstained, the lights pleasantly dim, the furniture not completely saturated with stale cigarette smoke and cheap perfume. You had to assume it was supposed to be a gift. Loid wasn’t the type to flaunt an affair, but he’d gone out of his way not to bring you to another seedy, by-the-hour motel. If nothing else, you could appreciate a man willing to open his wallet.

There was a moment of quiet hesitation, then an airy laugh. You let go of him just in time for one of his arms to wrap around your waist, hauling you off of the mattress and into his lap, where he could bury his face in the crook of your neck without intervention. He held you like that for a long, agonizing second before pulling back, allowing just enough space between your body and his to press his lips against your temple, then into your own. The kiss was gentle, lingering, and you let yourself melt into it, into him. Genuine shows of adoration were rare, in your line of work. While you doubted Loid felt anything more towards you than lust-tinged fondness, he was a good enough actor to pull off the role of ‘Lovestruck Idiot’ with little to no breaks in his character. “You don’t know how much I want to,” he started, with a smile as hollow as the man who wore it. “But Yor’s at home with our daughter, tonight. It’d be cruel to leave her on her own.”

A slight pout, quickly traded for something more aloof. As if you were trying to hide your disappointment and doing a poor job of it. “Anya must really be a handful if you’re too worried to leave your wife alone with her.”

He was grinning, now, his expression tinted with something you didn’t quite recognize. He opened his mouth, but a knock on the hotel room’s door interrupted your hushed conversation. You frowned, but Loid didn’t seem bothered. “Why don’t you get that?”

“It’s probably just some drunk tourist. They’ll go away if we ignore them.” You brought a hand to his face, cupping his cheek. “I’d rather give my attention to—”

Another knock, this one a little more forecful than the last. Loid squeezed your side, almost playfully. “Answer the door.”

It wasn’t a question, this time.

Hesitantly, you pried yourself away from him, pushing yourself to your feet. Your clothes had been torn off and discarded hours ago, but you snagged Loid’s button-up off of the floor and shrugged it on as you approached the door, pausing once you reached the entryway. You cast a nervous glance towards Loid, who responded with an encouraging nod and a slight wave, gestures that would’ve been more suited for an anxious child, afraid to leave their parent’s side for the very first time. Biting into your bottom lip, you slowly undid the rusted latch and slid the deadbolt out of place, resting your shoulder against the cool wood as your hand found the knob.

Yor was on you as soon as you opened the door.

Her hands in your hair, her knee between your thighs, her mouth crashing into yours with enough force to bruise. She slammed your back against the nearest wall, knocking the air from your lungs and pinning you underneath her strength as her tongue invaded your mouth, as teeth clashed against teeth and pointed nails scrape against your scalp. It was a desperate connection, frenzied and feral, driven by something you couldn’t define and only broken by your mutual need for air – her breath coming in shallow, panted gasps when she finally pulled away from you.

Her attire was the first thing you noticed, her evening gown dark enough to blend into the shadows of the entryway and maimed brutally. A long gash ran from her hip to the hem of her skirt, another bisecting her midriff, revealing a slit of pale skin and sculpted muscle. There were a thousand more nicks in the fabric, a thousand more reasons for you to panic, but your stare was quickly drawn upward, to her face.

To the dots of blood splattered across her cheeks, still fresh enough to shine crimson in the dim light.

You opened your mouth, but didn’t have time to spit anything out before Yor snapped toward Loid, her disposition going from one of mindless desire to frantic apologeticness in the blink of an eye. “I’m sorry I’m late!” It seemed to come out louder than she intended it to, the words hasty enough to blend together as she stumbled through her crowded. "The governer wasn’t at home, and he had more guards than he was supposed to, and it took ages for—”

“As long as you’re not hurt, you have nothing to apologize for.” While you were stunned beyond words, Loid remained unaffected – indifferent to both his wife’s sudden appearance and your confusion. “Try to call next time, though. I was about to go out and see if you needed a hand.”

“Oh, I couldn't do that. Your job is already so much more stressful than mine - I can't ask you to do my work, too.” And just like that, she was brightening, any concerns she might've held about being late or injured or covered in blood dissipating in a matter of seconds. She turned to you, her hands falling to your own as she tugged you forward, towards the bed. You tried to pull yourself out of her hold, but her grip was vice-like, impossible to escape. She didn’t even seem to notice your futile efforts. If anything, she almost seemed shy, a pale blush creeping across her cheeks as she asked, “I… I didn’t keep you waiting for too long, did I?”

You couldn’t bring yourself to answer. Loid had been part of the job - seek out the target that the dark-haired man had identified, lure him into an affair, and keep up the act just long enough for his wife to catch and initiate a messy divorce. Sleeping with the aforementioned wife in addition to the mark you’d been paid to seduce had been a complimentary service, a creative touch to liven up an otherwise dull assignment, but you’d been careful, made sure neither of them had ever seen you with the other, never used the same shade of lipstick to stain Loid’s collar as you did to kiss Yor’s neck. You weren’t an amateur. You didn’t make mistakes like that. Neither of them should’ve known their partner knew about you, not unless they were both insane enough to come out and tell the other who they were going to see when they disappeared into cheap motels and empty offices. No married couple would be so honest about something so detrimental to their relationship. No normal married couple, at least.

But, you were starting to think that Yor and Loid didn’t fit into that category as neatly as you’d hoped they would.

“The poor thing must still be a little startled,” Loid chuckled, finally pushing himself to his feet. Yor perked up, and with an airy sigh, Loid nodded, the exchange as silent as it was coordinated. With no further permission needed, you were thrown onto the mattress, barely allowed to land before Yor was on top of you, latching onto your throat, pointed teeth burying themselves into the curve of your neck. The pain was immediate, searing, but you couldn’t bring yourself to care about how much it hurt when Yor’s attention had already fallen to your collarbone, then your chest, her focus drifting lower while her affection remained just as hostile. Loid, as stoic and as sociopathic as always, positioned himself next to your head, watching his wife work with an expression that only betrayed the slightest trace of fondness – a pleasure so diluted, it might've just been a trick of the light. “You can relax. Yor’s been looking forward to this for months. I haven’t been much better, to be honest. Yuri's never sent anyone so...” He trailed off, letting his head lull to the side. “So tempting our way before., I suppose.”

He was cupping your face, as if to mimic your own dramatized mannerisms, running the pad of his thumb over your cheek. Yor groaned against your skin, a noise that you could only guess was meant to signal agreement, and Loid broke into a small grin.

For once, you thought his smile might actually be genuine.

[average-hyperfixator]

This is probably the weirdest way to show that I'm in the Mouthwashing fandom, and like nobody is going to see this BUT

If I see ONE MORE person compare Ted to Jimmy I'm going to LOSE MY FUCKING MIND. Is this another testament to people not understanding Ted's overall role in the story and his character arc? YES, YES IT IS. RE READ THE BOOK. RE LISTEN TO THE RADIO DRAMA. GAME IS IT'S OWN CONVERSATION THAT WILL TAKE TOO LONG FOR ME TO DISECT + IT HAS IT'S OWN STORY AND THUS WILL NOT BE INCLUDED HERE.

Jimmy is a jealous man, who assaults (and unfortunately impregnates) Anya, and then tries to crash the ship so he doesn't have to deal with the consequences, and when everyone lives, they live in misery BECAUSE OF HIM. He is the co-pilot, he has more power and authority over the others, and he ACTIVELY makes things worse, and is at fault for the crash and the subsequent fallout. (this section is shorter, simply because I've been in the IHNMAIMS fandom much longer and have way more thoughts on Ted) Ted, on the other hand, is not at fault for the world ending. He is just as trapped as the other five, he's more prone to mental manipulation and THINKING he's better off, but he really isn't. He doesn't have more power of the others because he's also a victim. He is by no means a great guy, or even a good guy; They key difference is that at the end of his story, the book, he actually fucking HELPS. Rather than make his friends continue to live in misery, he puts them out of it, and rather than end his own suffering, he spends those precious few seconds he could be ramming an icicle into himself, comforting Ellen as she dies. It doesn't make up for what he's thought and said, BUT, it's something at least. It's remorse, it's letting her finally be content, it's trying to give her the empathy she showed him time and time again. And he gets turned into a horrid slug creature after, he actively suffers more than everyone else for the rest of time- he self sacrifices so his friends could be at peace. TLDR: Jimmy is objectively selfish and doesn't change much throughout the game, save for MAYBE the very end (ig putting Curly in the pod is one brownie point for him) however Ted actually shows growth by the end of the story, and makes a point to end the suffering of his friends, while ultimately sacrificing himself in the process. If I catch another person equating these two I'm just gonna start throwing hammers at them I DON'T CARE. I am THE Ted defender, and I WILL stand my ground that, while he is no where near perfect, he DOES become a better person by the end of the story and deserves to have that acknowledged. anyway this has been sick rants with me, feel free to add on in reblogs or perchance spark a FRIENDLY debate. I apologize if I come off rude here, Ted and IHNMAIMS have been a hyperfixation of mine for months and I am very easily riled up about the story and characters. adding new tag ; Jace rants 🗯️ ! For all my ranting escapades from now on.

[proudfreakmetarusonikku]

before I go to bed and spend tomorrow doing mostly spreadsheets (it’s fun I swear I love logistics I’m doing it entirely for fun and restarting a game bc I find making detailed spreadsheet plans that enjoyable and I realised I could get some cool mods bc I don’t care about balance) I really appreciate that while mouthwashing acknowledges and condemns curly's enabling behaviour, it never presents his disabilities or his abuse as some sort of just punishment. his extremely naïve faith in jimmy hurt everyone and was born out of a patronising misogynistic worldview where he assumed anya was mentally unwell before she was a victim but what happens to him is not a fair consequence, it’s just horrible and senseless. even if it happening made curly aware of the suffering anya did- the obvious parallels between the rape and himself being forced to take his pain medication are something I’m sure crossed his mind in the months he spent trying to focus on anything but pain- that in no way is ever framed as a good thing even if it technically made him a better person in some respects bc under No Circumstances is abuse ever justified or okay. curly is not a great person, but you do not have to be a perfect victim to be a victim. no one deserves the humiliation and violation jimmy put others through, not even jimmy himself. curly made many mistakes, and was a deeply flawed human- to think otherwise is to fall into jimmy's ableist and dehumanising obsession he uses to justify his abuse of curly- but he was not malicious. the patriarchal support of abuse eats its own, any man who falls outside of the cishetero able bodied white supremacist ideas of man are victims of it. this is not a hashtag girlboss moment, and is tragic and horrible in its own right bc abuse is always horrible, even if men aren’t the primary intended victims and even if those men uphold the patriarchy. bc people can be victims and also be deeply harmful to each other. the lines between the misogynistic sexual abuse towards anya and the violent medical abuse towards curly are blurred on purpose- bc being disabled means curly is no longer protected by male solidarity when the idea of maleness we have excludes disabled people. the parallels between ableism and misogyny are a very prominent theme I don’t see discussed much about the game, and them not framing curly as in any way deserving of his injuries nor the ableist abuse against him is so important for that point. like, curly sucks in a lot of ways, but he’s still a human being, and no human being deserves violation of any kind, whether they’re dehumanised for being disabled or for being a woman.

[cameoliob]

i'm the kallus jovan anon again, never apologize for writing what is basically an entire angsty fic, it was an amazing raed. can i ask you more stuff about these two? like how did it go from kallus pov? tell me more about his youth in the underbelly of corruscant? why doesn't he have a family :( and what does he think about jovans parents and all of their lifestyles?

HI I'M ANSWERING YOUR ASKS OUT OF ORDER BUT WE BALL (also i love you thank you so much for letting me yap)

Okay, so Kallus' upbringing is so interesting to me and I have ALOT of thoughts about it

I have a another post thats kind of about this (but it's specifically about his sister, Anya (that I made up) so you can find that here, BUT i want to get into the nitty gritty of his upbringing anyways so HERE WE GO

Kallus' father passed away in a work related accident shortly before he was born, and his mother, unable to bear the stress of a dead husband, a newborn, and Coruscanti housing prices, prompty fucks off. Kallus' older sister, Anya, who is 16 at the time, takes it upon herself to raise her baby brother.

They had lived in the mid-levels for a number of years (all of which Kallus was too young to remember), thanks to Anya taking up a ton of different jobs, but the Coruscanti housing prices rise like NOBODYS buissness and eventually they end up in the lower levels.

Although they were dirt poor (except there was no dirt because it's Coruscant) they were as happy as they could have been. Kallus was, by nature, an energetic, gritty little kid with undeniable ambition and drive, and Anya-- who at this point is more mom than sister-- worked hard so that she could give him to opprotunities he deserved.

Anya was a strong believer in getting a good education and she managed to get Kallus into the mid-level middle/high school that she had gone to (and graduated early from!) in her teen years.

Coruscanti housing prices are still rising.

Kallus gets his first job when he's 12 (they dont gaf about child labor laws) as a dishwasher at one of the diners his sister works at because the owner had a real soft spot for "the sweet girl and her skinny kid." (Eventually he gets promoted to server but that's really besides the point) ANYWAYS

So basically, teenage Kallus, who is fighting tooth and nail to get THE HEELLLLL out of the lower levels via education, has a daily schedule that looks like:

4:15 AM - Wake up

4:30 - leave the house

4:45-6:45 - take the lift up to school (do homework on the way)

7:15 - 3:00 - School

3:30 - 5:30 - take the lift down (do homework on the way)

6:00 - 11:30 - work

12:15- go to bed

Dont get it twisted though, bro had HOBBIES (which included, but were not limited to, fixing broken droids, bad graphiti, pickpocketing, going clubbing, and just kind of running around with whimsy) (All of which he would do on his singular day off per week)

So basically this man has NEVER known rest in his entire life

It's after Kallus turns 18 and graduates that his sister passes away at 33. The lower levels are polluted, the air so smogged up and toxic that nearly everyone deeper than level 2000 gets sick at some point. Anya had lived the average length of a lower-level citizen, but that didn't console Kallus whatsoever.

Landlords are assholes, and the 2 year lease on his shoebox apartments name was under ANYAs name, not his, so landlord decides that he should kick this greiving 18 year old kid to the curb so that he can bump up rent for the next person.

Kallus, as any person would, spirals. He's couch hopping, he may or may not be partaking in mind-altering substances that may or may not be considered illegal, he is losing his goddamned mind. This is his rock bottom. And he realizes that he'd better get his shit together or else he'll be stuck in the lower levels swimming in alchohol and greif for the rest of his life (which would not be long).

And then news finally gets down to the lower levels (a month after the fact) that the Republic is gone, and that the Empire has taken its place. And the Empire doesn't want a clone army anymore, no, they want people to enlist. And do you know what enlisting means???

Free room and board

So Kallus hops THE FUUUCCKKK on this opprotunity, because who wouldnt????

And when he goes to enlist, he finds out that since he went to a school in the mid-levels he's elligable to test-in to the academy. Which he does, and succeeds at.

So now he's at the academy after the most insane and miserable month of his life, and there are all these rich ASSHOLES, who have just been living up here??? In the sun??? With money??? This whole time???

So he, of course, hates them all

But then Jovan shows up.

The only real kindness Kallus had ever known had been from Anya, his sister (mom?) who devoted her entire life to ensuring that he had a better one. Other than her, everyone Kallus had ever met was after something, weather that be money, a favor, ect. So when Jovan shows up, all smiles and niceness and whatever, Kallus doesn't trust him. Eventually, though, he realizes that Jovan is kind just for the hell of it. He's kind because he can be.

So he accepts Jovans friendship.

And Jovan teaches him how to fit in. How to dress, how to talk, how to act, ect ect. It's all a bit overwelming, of course, but Kallus is glad, because at least people arent looking at him all weird in the hallways anymore.

At the end of the year he finally properly meets Jovans parents after Jovan offers to bring him on their family vacation. And goddamnit, so wonder their son is so sweet, they are too.

Jovans mom takes him shopping for new clothes to wear on vacation, she buys him lunch, and when they come back she shows him all the embarassing baby-photos of Jovan that she had stashed away.

And when they go on vacation (on Naboo, ive decided) Jovans dad tries to teach Kallus how to fish, even though Jovans dad is not good at fishing, and really just wanted to wear a fun hat and sit by the lake for a few hours. (Kallus discovers that catching fish with his bare-hands actually has a higher success rate than when he tried with the pole)

Yeah, theyre rich upper-level-ers with soft hands, and they have no idea how bad things can get down in the lower-levels (and probably never will), but they're just so goddamned sweet. They're not like the kids in his classes at the academy who made fun of his unkempt hair, or his perpetual sunburn, or the way his accent was a bit off, theyre kind.

And Jovan is kind.

It's kind of a no-brainer that Kallus fell for the guy

[lesbianboyfriend]

thinking about your sexual violence discussion in Buffy.

I think there is something in Anya's story arc in season 7 that ties in.

D'hoffryn is always polite and affable but always proves to be sadistic. he wears politeness as a disguise. When Aud cursed her husband, she is praised and exalted by this demon man who promised her power and glory for the chance to do something good in the world like help women get revenge.

but he really thinks of all of his girls as disposable. he kills Halfrek just to make Anya hurt. kind of like how the watchers view the Slayer as disposable. You can always find other woman to fill the gap. preferably a young attractive one.

he is not interested in The actual revenge that happens. he doesn't actually care about the girls who work for him. he just wants power over people. They even say there's always vengeance needed at brothels, implying that a lot of revenge is tied to sexual violence or misbehavior. he is taking advantage of women in these situations to build his influence rather than actually help them.

Anya truly believes she is doing good work until now when she realizes that she is not helping these women, very frequently she is scaring them. That's why she wants to undo the wish. she doesn't want to hurt women anymore and she is punished for that

omg….anon im kissing you on the lips. this is such such a good point. i’ve been meaning to examine anya’s place in the btvs sexual violence schema and i think you’re so right with this…..i think there’s also something to be said for how anya’s character in general has literally only revolved around men….d’hoffryn as a vengeance demon, then xander when she lost that, then d’hoffryn again when she lost xander, then xander again when she loses d’hoffryn again…..the episode where anya gives up being a vengeance demon is SUCH a good episode where she decides that she has to define her life outside of these relationships to men. and then they immediately bring her back to just joke about her and xander again. she deserved so much better…..i think there’s also something to be said for how her loving money is played off as like a joke and a negative character trait but how having money is like. a very material necessity for women to have independence from men especially considering the era she grew up in where she literally would not have had any money of her own. anya has never been independent she has always been reliant on a man in her life out of necessity. she took so much shit from xander because as a demon recently turned young woman she was not equipped to live in the world on her own and the help of the scoobies was dependent on her relationship with xander…..genuinely makes me seethe how her character was treated so poorly by the other characters and narratively as just a joke character when she’s literally such a rich interesting and fascinating person…..anya babygirl i would treat you so right