#and i don't ever want to speak to another person

[imsofreakingtired]

I am so so so so sorry if this is too close to nsfw (in my head it's very fluff/comfort but I apologise if it makes you uncomfortable bc I'm not sure), but thinking about Sevika w/ a partner who's been pressured by their ex's into doing things like sexually and her just reassuring them that like no baby I wanna hold you what r you talking ab I've been here all of 15 seconds I'm not tryna fuck calm down

And her partner who is so so surprised wdym ??? You just wanna spoon me isn't this the part where you grope my chest and Sevika is like BABY NO

I don't know I'm using her to cope this is so self indulgent I just wanna hear your thoughts on it

i love this idea, thank you for the request anon...and shitt this one was so personally relatable to me 😔

things i wanna say to you

content warning(s): mentions of trauma from past relationships, angst, hurt/comfort

"there's things i wanna say to you, but i'll just let you live like if you hold me without hurting me you'll be the first who ever did."

~~~

“Your beauty…it’s a blessing.”

It’s a sentence that returns and returns to you. It’s a truth you hold in your hands, or wear on your shoulders like a mantle you can’t take off. You have heard it, in one form or another, from the lips of lover to lover. They whispered it to you in the heat of sex, like a special confession only for you, and then vanished like a vapor. 

Your body is like a hotel, you think—a pretty room that people pass through and love only in the moment. When was the last time you were held without the other person’s hands hungrily seeking your breasts? When was the last time you were kissed without their hands roaming your body like an impatient, starved animal? 

Once, you had worked up the courage to confront them. You told them, “hands off.” You don’t exactly remember how the conversation went. But you know that it ended in them laughing in your face, suggesting you work at Babette’s if you wanted compensation for your body. 

When they were gone, you stood in the silent room and wondered if they were right. You wondered if it was your fault. If your body was the only good thing, the only worthy thing about you. If you were nothing more than a pretty face and a blank canvas waiting to be ruined. If you were asking too much when you asked for even just a shadow of respect. 

You stopped speaking after that. 

~~~

Shortly after you began to work for Silco as his record scribe, you met his henchwoman, Sevika. Immediately you knew she was different. She didn’t look at you the way others did—in fact, she barely looked at you at all. When she spoke to you she looked down at you over her hooked nose, her handsome, perfect nose, in a way that made you feel both insignificant and the only woman in the entire world. She didn’t give you flattery about your appearance, spoke bluntly when you made mistakes. 

Still you caught her staring at you from time to time when she thought you were too immersed in work to notice. But her face betrayed nothing. Her brows were always drawn together as if everything in the world annoyed her. You assumed she was only scrutinizing the way you worked. You wondered if Silco had ordered her to monitor you, assess your performance. You worked harder as a result, feeling oddly gratified to be watched for a reason other than your appearance. 

So one could imagine your shock when Sevika strode up to your desk one morning and said, “get your coat. Walk with me.” 

From that day on, you were hers. 

~~~

The first night you moved into her apartment had been a hard day at work. You had been at the desk all day without a single break, trying frantically to keep up with the endless flow of Shimmer shipment records and orders. Sevika had been on her feet from dawn to dusk—you hadn’t seen her for two consecutive minutes even though you worked in the same building. 

The night had deepened, the sky outside dusted with faint stars. You were undressing for bed. If you were tired, how exhausted must Sevika be? You paused in front of the mirror before you slipped the nightshirt over your body. Maybe she would want to let off some steam. Maybe she expected it from you. Hesitantly, you put the nightshirt on. You didn’t want to, but you felt like you owed it to her. Like she deserved it.

Sevika came in, her mechanical arm detached and water glistening on her face from a quick wash. She smiled slightly when she saw you waiting on the bed. “There’s my girl. C’mere.”

She sank into the bed you now shared with her, and obediently you crawled over and folded yourself into her embrace. Her right arm curled around you protectively. Her warmth, her strength, the tautness of her muscles against your skin. It was heavenly. 

She sighed into your neck, and it made you shiver slightly. The question tiptoed to the end of your tongue: can we…can we maybe just stay like this? 

But you feared she would say no. You feared she would be mad. And leave you. 

You waited for her to make the next move, to start pulling the shirt over your head, or turn you around so she could grope between your legs. When several seconds passed and she did nothing, you realized that maybe she was waiting for you. 

Reluctantly, you pulled yourself away and began to take off your shirt. 

Sevika sat up, confused. “What are you doing?”

You freeze in your movements. Your shirt falls back down over your chest. “I—you don’t want to…?”

She shook her head, lips curling in a bemused smile. “Baby, relax. I’ve been here fifteen seconds.”

Slowly, you returned to her, and she pulled you close once more. Sevika felt the shudder of relief that went through your body. Though you didn’t see it, her face creased with concern. She had noticed the apprehension in your eyes, nearly bordering on fear. And she made a mental note to herself to find whatever fucker had hurt you and made you so scared. 

~~~

[yandere-romanticaa]

I'll probably delete this rant in a few hours but right now I'm just writing it down here because I don't have anyone to share it with irl because I feel sorta embarrassed about it.

I feel like I have a lot of love to share. A lot of love to give. I feel as though I have this massive bubble filled with love and want and desire deep within my soul but I don't have anyone to share it with. I've never had someone like that nor has anyone ever expressed any sort of interest in me in that way. I know that there were some guys in the past who thought that I was cute but that's really it.

I've absolutely no one to love. And I'm sort of getting tired of that.

My friends try to comfort me by telling me that this is a good thing. That this is wonderful actually, because I have never experienced the agony of heartbreak, the sorrow of knowing that all of your time and effort has been wasted into a person who you most likely will not ever speak to ever again. Break ups are messy, they are so beyond messy and painful and rarely ever are they easy to handle.

But their words don't offer me any comfort whatsoever. Why?

Because I feel as though I am a person who is dying of thirst watching another drown.

It's two sides of the same coin. Both are horrible and soul crushing but what brings me even more pain is how no one understands how I feel, nor do they even bother hearing me out. No one understands just how hollow I feel whenever someone tells me something like "you'll find the one when you least expect it!" or "don't worry about it, you are not missing out on much!"

Stop. Just stop.

I don't want to hear that, I am so fucking tired of hearing those words, over and over and over and over and over again. I am tired. I am so tired. I feel heartbroken and I don't even know why. All I know is that I just want someone to see me, to hear me. To just listen to me. Also, yes, I know that having a partner won't magically just fix all of my problems, of course not. That's not how the world works and I fully understand and comprehend that.

But god damn it all. I just want someone to hold me, to think that I'm pretty, to wipe my tears away and tell me that I'm acting like a clown. I want someone who'll love me and I want to love another so, so, so much. I am not a bad person, at least I don't think I am. I have a life, I go to school, I have friends whom I love and cherish, I have a family who will be there for me through thick and thin.

But none of them understand how I feel. None of them understand just how heavy my chest feels whenever I start to feel like this, how much pain it causes me. I just crave love, I crave it so much. But I am so scared that I will never find it. I've never experienced it before - why would anyone even bother with me?

I'm sorry for such a silly post. If you actually read this, I'd love to give you a hug. And if you somehow relate to this post, I am so sorry.

I'm sorry for such a weepy post. But I just wanted to shout into the darkness, to let out my feelings and frustrations. I just. I think I want to weep a little. Maybe more than a little.

[rainbow-neko-artblog]

I’m asking this out of pure curiosity, in another post you said one of the reasons you don’t like the nightmare critters is because they don’t follow the design rules set by the smiling critters, exactly what do you mean by that? Like in your words what does a critter have to look like to be considered a smiling critter? I’m not trying to be rude or anything I’m just trying to understand what you mean

I dont find this rude don't worry- a lot of people don't actually notice this, but sometimes when a group of characters are designed together, in order to make them look cohesive, there are unspoken rules that may go unnoticed to viewers untrained eye, but helps keeps the characters looking like they came from the same place.

I mentioned, back when I was into Welcome Home, that they used a very special rainbow pallet that hardly ever included purple.

And when old black and white cartoons are brought up, there's specific clothing and anatomy (like pie cut eyes and hose-like limbs) that define the rules of the era.

If you want a cohesive character design, you have to pick out the rules, and then decide when breaking them would benefit the character in a way that won't break the viewers immersion.

Some of the most obvious rules I caught for the smiling critters:

- 2 color pallet.

- Simple Charms

- Tongues but NO TEETH

- Dynamic posing that speaks to their personality

Some of the critters break these rules for the benefit of diversity, but never ALL of them! Dogday is the leader, so he gets an extra color, Crafty is all white, but her CHARM is rainbow, so it balances it out. Kicken doesn't use a lot of his second color, because the LEADER is also using that color.

None of their charms get that detailed. All of them maintain the no teeth rule because that was the whole fucking point of their creepy factor- big open GAPING maws, no teeth. And all of their poses spoke to their personalities. Half of them aren't just *standing there* with a hand up for no reason, and none of them used the same pose.

Now let's compare with these rejects.

Ignoring the fact that Mob Entertainment failed to realize they didn't even post the right images for the first three nightmare critters they showed off (failing to include the iconic smiling critters line-shadow-effect)

-Simon, Maggie, Rabie, Allister and Touille break the color pallet rule, this amount needs to be lowered. To like 3 at most. Holy shit.

-Icky, Maggie, Touille, and Baba's charms are FAR to detailed, they do not need to be.

-THE TEETH OH MY GOD I HATE THE TEETH SO FUCKING MUCH you have ruined anything scary about them in one simply design choice I hope you're happy Mob entertainment.

- Touille and Allister have the same pose. Icky and Maggie have the same pose. Simon and Poe have the same pose. And NONE of them are as effective at telling their personalities as much as the smiling critters were.

Further more- even beyond rules. Icky is FUNDAMENTALY FLAWED as a design. They're ugly- not to mention we all struggled to know what the fuck he actually WAS supposed to be when he was released. It took someone pointing out that he didn't have a tail for me to realize he was one of those toxic frogs.

If you're gonna make something based on a group of characters you ALREADY made, and try to pass them off as new characters, I expect the rules to be the same. These are ugly knock offs made to sell more plushies on Mob entertainments website and I hate them with every FIBER of my being.

[genderqueerdykes]

it might just be us + where we live, but... is transmasc erasure rlly that bad?? /genq bc... we know so many trans people and we've never met a transfem person... again no harm meant by this, we live in utah so our exposure to queer ppl in general is very skewed

it's good that you provided context! thanks for stopping by!

it's going to vary heavily on someone's area and perspective- but transmasc erasure can happen even within transmasculine spaces, so i wanted to let you know just to be careful. transmascs apologizing for being trans men, making sure they're not "too" masculine as to not "threaten" the women and femmes around them, allowing themselves to be talked over by other trans people, believing that transmascs don't face transandrophobia, and so on can still happen within transmasc spaces. just because there are transmascs there does not mean they aren't possibly participating in self-erasure or erasing their friends

if you're not exposed to other conversations, they won't feel anywhere near as impactful, so if you're in a community where people are acknowledging each other and respecting one another, it's going to seem like a non-issue, because fortunately, it is for you all! and that's a good thing, but these types of communities aren't that common, unfortunately. i'm glad you have that!

erasure is a big issue in other spaces where there are a larger variety of genders, unfortunately, yes. i'm glad that you have a lot of transmascs to have community with! that's huge and im happy, that's a blessing! the spaces i've occupied have been largely mixed genders and identities, and the trans spaces i've been have basically been transfem only with sparing transmascs or nonbinary people here and there. some people really do just tell transmascs to shut up or to not speak about their issues ever because that somehow holds someone else down, etc. etc. there are different groups who participate in the behavior and they handle it in different ways but the end result is always the same

historically there hasn't been much data at all on transmasculine lives for this purpose. there are notable transmasculine and trans man historical figures but theres not much info on most transmasculine and trans man people in general. it's just not information that's preserved well because it's always been hard for us to come out no matter what. there's been lack of interest and support for a long time, and every few decades people find different reasons to mock transmasculine people and trans men and assert that they're just hysterical/stupid/broken/tainted/crossdressing/butch women, or teenagers. there's always some kind of theft of autonomy when it comes to their own identity

i hope that makes sense! let me know if you have any other questions!

[tsukii0002]

"Anything new?"

"Nothing new, Satan is a complicated person, you know?"

"Sure, I know better than you"

The human in front of him sighed, the way he treated them was stressful, the mere fact of relating with him was.

"Well that's it, I'll keep you informed"

"Okay"

The human stared at him, he snorted at the look.

"What?"

"Are you all right?"

"Eh?"

"You seem a little… Different than normal"

"It's nothing, now go before Lucifer notices you're gone"

Another sigh.

"Okay, okay, I'm going… Why do you have to be like that?"

“Because he likes you”

As the sound of the footsteps moving away grew fainter and fainter, the voice in his head grew louder. Belphegor squeezed the pillow between his arms.

"Aggg what the hell are you saying?"

“You're still denying it?

"The what????"

“That you like that human”

The demon slowly opened his eyes, however he immediately gritted his teeth and stood up and walked away from the door that held him captive.

"That's stupid, something like that will never happen"

“Are you sure? because I think they've started to notice it”

Belphegor stopped dead in his tracks, nothing could be heard, but he noticed stares from every corner of that empty room. He was starting to become paranoid.

"No, I'm just using them, when they gets me out of here…"

“What will happen then? Will you kill them?”

"Yes, I'll finish them off and this will never happen again"

“Oh you can try to fool yourself, but you can't hide how your pupils dilate at the sight of them”

He tenses at those words, his knuckles are white, he doesn't want to listen anymore.

“The way your pulse races, the little smile that tugs at your lips when you see them appear and the fact that they're the first thing you think of when you wake up and the last thing you think of when you go to bed”

"Shut up, shut up, shut up, shut up, they're nothing but a human, a miserable, ridiculous human… because of them Lilith…"

He brings his hands to his ears shaking his head with all the strength he has, falling to the floor, he doesn't want to hear it, he doesn't want to, but he can't stop it.

“Don't lie to yourself, they are a ray of light in your miserable life, they're the only thing that separates you from madness, the only person who cares about you… if it weren't for them-”

"Stop it!!! I would never fall in love with a human!!!"

Silence

"I would never… make that mistake"

“You wish you could tell her that the same thing happened to you, that you understand her now, you wish Lilith knew”

He bit down on his lip, blood had begun to well up, but it wasn't the only thing spilling onto the attic floor, his eyes were filled with tears. It wasn't true, it couldn't be, it was impossible, he, of all demons, would never love a human.

"You can't convince me, I… I…"

“I don't need to convince you Belphegor, you're the only one here.”

The demon looked around, he was alone. As he had been until that human answered his call. He got up and started looking for something he knew he wouldn't find, he looked in the mirror, he seemed on the verge of insanity. Maybe he was already crazy.

"Are you all right?"

From the tears that bathed his face, a smile gave way to a laugh, a broken laugh mixed with a desperate cry. He would get out of there, end that stupid exchange program and everything would go back to normal, he would never see their face again.

He stopped, silence, the attic seemed again as empty and cold as ever.

.

.

Well, this is an idea that reflects a situation in which Belphie fell in love with Mc before leaving the attic, and how this clashed with his convictions, his plan and the feelings he had had for centuries. Reflected in the loss of sanity that being locked in the attic by his own brother meant, and the clash of his desires, which would be the two voices speaking in his head.

How deep I've gotten so suddenly😂😂😂, if you've made it this far thank you for reading 🩷

.

.

[crownmemes]

Warning Sentences

(Sentences for warning muses of upcoming trouble. Adjust phrasing where needed)

"You've lost your reputation, and a reputation's life glass: once cracked it can never be repaired."

"Say that again and your career is over."

"I'm trying to warn your that your attitude is going to bite you in the ass!"

"I warned you; don't get involved."

"Once you've opened your heart, you can't close it again."

"If you think I'm the type who won't shoot you in the back, you're wrong."

"Let me make it clear to you that you are in no position to dictate terms."

"Bite my hand, and I will put you down."

"Be careful. You're too beautiful to die."

"There was a time when I would have gladly killed you, and there may come a time when I gladly shall."

"I'd tread very carefully if I were you. You, of all people, should know what I am capable of."

"Before you speak another word, I ask you to consider this: how valuable is your life?"

"You're causing everybody quite a bit of trouble. If you want a word of warning: don't keep it up."

"If you keep going where you're going, you're going to find trouble - whether it was there to begin with or not."

"I warned you not to succumb to temptation!"

"The danger is not over. It's just begun."

"You'll end up falling out with everyone if you carry on like this!"

"I'm warning you once: stay away from things that are none of your business."

"From now on, you will stay out of this. "

"A wise man would walk away from this house and make a concerted effort to forget everything that occurred last night."

"Don't you know it's dangerous to sneak up on an armed man?"

"I'm sorry, but I'm going to destroy you."

"Don't look for it. You may not like what you find."

"This whole thing is a trap!"

"If you want to live to see another day, you'll be out of town by nightfall."

"Do I need to remind you what happened last time you pushed me too far?"

"You're either really dumb, or you're trying to provoke me, which also makes you really dumb."

"Sometimes, what we wake up can't be put back to sleep."

"You've used the threat of violence against my family twice now, for the sake of your own personal well-being, I really wouldn't again."

"You're not going to survive coming after me."

"You are delving into areas over which you have no authority."

"I'm warning you; no more questions!"

"If this continues, it won't be long until you've got nothing left."

"You're coming up on your last chance to turn back."

"I must warn you that my patience is not inexhaustible."

"We stay out of other people's business out here, if you catch my drift."

"Don't ever defy me again."

"I warned you, but you didn't heed me."

"Don't ask again or I'll kill you."

"I must warn you, you are about to set a very dangerous precedent."

"Mark my words: I'm not one to play games."

"You should be more afraid of me."

[pixiedurango]

If you wouldn't mind, I'd appreciate a letter from Illario to Lucanis that is basically him wondering how the hell his awkward cousin managed to attract a hottie like Rook De Riva. (Bonus points for it being my Rook, Adava. I've posted a couple screenshot archives of her.) Thank you very much! This is such a wonderful and fun thing you're doing for the community!

Ding Dong. Another special delivery from the Antivan Postal Service.

We all know Illario is a yapper... this may be the reason why this letter is so crazy long. It's a bit more than just the one requested topic, I hope you don't mind, but I felt, that even Illario would not just kick down the door and starts asking awkward questions about his cousin's love-life. I honestly can't figure, how Lucanis would even answer this letter... Anyway, enjoy!

Transcript:

Cousin, I hope you don’t mind me, bothering you. I know the new First Talon is still saving the world and has probably not the time and even less patience to read from a despicable criminal anyway. Even (or rather because) said criminal is your blood and the closest thing to family you’ll ever have. Beside of course our dear Caterina, who naturally sends her regards (because this way she’s excused to write a letter to you herself. Which of course she would never confirm, and I would NEVER even think. Huh, who wrote that?)

I spend my time doing paperwork for the Diamond recently, since Viago could not be bothered to supervise me all day and night (which I don’t take offensive, I would not want to be my watchdog, either.) Of course no one gives me a contract anymore, maybe there are some with my name on it, but I fear, you’ll find that name in an unfamiliar spot there. No wonder, Viago is paranoid, that something might get out of hand. Which would make him fail his first ever contract from the new First Talon by losing his ward (that would be me).

Not that I wish for this to happen, but then, what is life without the roofs of Treviso in the moonlight, its markets and cafés. The canals and gondolas and the beautiful people in the streets. While I am stuck in the belly of the Diamond. Copying inventory lists.

Anyway, how’s your days? And I mean the parts we don’t get to read in the gazettes or war reports. Allow me to live a little through your new life. I want to know about hat Lighthouse you’re residing in. Living in the Fade is such a weird concept on its own – but being there stuck with a bunch of non-Antivans who are each so different and unique, but you’re still all on the same contract - that sounds like an interesting experience. And they are all so stunningly beautiful and exciting personalities.

Speaking of exciting: Send my kindest regards to that divine but harsh Tevinter detective if you don’t mind, my brother. I’d be very intrigued to get to know other Tevinter people. For a wider perspective, maybe if you want to call it that?

And no, I’m not trying to make a joke here. Or try to push a shady agenda. I just feel that my choices of people from the Imperium was not the… most educated one.

You know what? Never mind, you shouldn’t have to bother with such silly requests and why I feel to ask them from you.

Better we hold onto our words about the things past until we can exchange them in person.

But, you are aware that I simply could have made up a story to make you introduce me to her, right? Or, even better, I just could have written to your Tevinter friend right away, instead of asking you to give my regards…

Speaking of friends. Must be all new and awkward for you, cousin. I can’t remember you having any close acquaintances ever, at all, when we grew up. I would never have thought, you’d have that in you.

Of course now, this all new YOU will not have any more use for your poor cousin - who’s fallen from grace, to do all the nasty ice breaking and socializing for you. And we were such a successful double like that.

Remember that wigmaker job? Vyranthium, I guess. It got you your, moniker, right? Demon of Vyranthium. Just like a creepy foreshadowing, don’t you think? Anyway, what was I talking about? Ah!

You did all the bloody work back then, I happily give you that, but without me? Way more complicated it would have been, I dare say. And even more dangerous as it was already.

Cousin, just think about it. We could rule Antiva together. Or just retire and be the rulers of our own court, whereever that may be - and do what ever we please.

Or did you eventually make peace with being the one in charge? First Talon! So much responsibility. And so large boots to fill.

May Caterina continue to live and rule on for many many more years to come. So you don’t have to step up entirely. Letting her continue to draw strings in the shadows, while you being the representative and handsome young face of the Antivan Crows. That was a clever move from the old girl. Or was it yours? Either way. She could have all that with less drama and an even prettier face, far more willing, to put up with her and her attics. But, well, here we are.

Sorry, I fell back into ramblings about things again, that should be topic for us talking in person. Forgive me. How did I get there in the first place… I have no idea. Maybe this gives you a hint, of just HOW boring the paperwork is, I get to do here. I start yapping. In a letter.

Before I end this pointless lament, cousin, brother! I want to congratulate you. Honestly. Of course, only if it's true, what’s going round within the Diamond and probably the salons of Treviso’s nobility, too. That the new First Talon, known to be the chastest of all Crows, finally decided to seriously court someone. And not only that. It’s even reciprocated this time, as we hear.

A strategic bond with the House of the 5th Talon? I hear that not few people are taking it this way.

But I know you better, cousin. You’d never engage into such an endeavor, when it’s not playing out like in your silly romance novels. (Yes, of course I know what you always hid between your textbooks and under the mattress. Kitsch!) But well, to each their own, I guess. You the books and me the real experience. But you seem to finally getting there, as it seems. Tell me everything, brother! I’ve witnessed you yapping about coffee and kisses goodbye and smarmy stuff like that. You were really into that de Riva girl, right from the start. There goes my last hope, that Adava had, or would ever discover, a soft spot for me behind her wall of professionalism and all business. Just joking, of course, I’m happy for you both. I mean it.

Just don’t let your heart and your… midsection get into the way of a contract. Which in your case would very much unfortunate for all of Thedas. But who am I to give you advice of matters of the heart… (or the midsection) My latest choices weren’t the smartest, either.

Before I end up filling a journal here, I’ll end now. If you want, write me back, I really want to hear about your life and could use any distraction. We’re family, after all. - Illario

Find the other letters here

[miraculous-floconfettis]

Something i've been wondering about Emilie for a while

I have often wondered if Adrien suddenly wanting to go to school and sneaking out right after his mother disappeared had something to do with the fact that one of the two people who wore his amok wasn't there to control him anymore (especially since Emilie was the one who used the peacock Miraculous and thus, "created" Adrien).

Don't get me wrong, Emilie seemed to be a very kind and lively person. She definitely was a lot nicer to Adrien than Gabriel ever was, and Adrien always speaks very highly of her.

The Werepapas episode showed us a glimpse of what his life was before his mother disappeared and they definitely had a strong and sweet bond. They must have shared a lot of amazing and loving moments that will be forever engraved in Adrien's heart.

But nothing is ever black and white, especially in the show.

We've often assumed at the beginning of the show that Adrien growing up isolated from the world was Gabriel's doing, but we tended to forget that his mother was here when he was younger and he still wasn't allowed to go to school or have friends (let alone a birthday party). Emilie must have had a say in the way they raised Adrien and maybe she might have been against sheltering him, but she did nothing in the end, and Adrien was raised in a gilded cage till she disappeared.

We've only been shown crumbs of the person Emilie was when she was still alive and even though her light seemed dimmed in the videos Nathalie watched or in the Werepapas episode (because she was obviously sick), Emilie seemed to have a strong personality: Gabriel described Adrien as "emotional" and and also said things like "I have to apologize for my son, he’s like his mom, he’s way too overly dramatic" and "Quite a temper, you remind me of someone" before turning to his wife's painting in Simon Says.

What i'm reading between those lines is that Emilie wasn't an "overly dramatic" person, but seemed to be someone who stood her ground and didn't back off in front of her husband or anyone else, and wanted her opinions and wishes to be heard and fulfilled.

And even though i don't like the idea of her using Adrien's amok against him, it still was in the wedding ring she was wearing all the time.

Another thing is that Adrien is really fond of his mother so she definitely must not have been evil and she loved her son a lot and took good care of him. But as he lost her quite young, he also must have an idolized image of her.

The best example i can compare that situation with is Harry Potter: he grew up without parents so he created this perfect image of them in his head to compensate for his loss. Harry even defended his dad against Severus Snape when he accused James Potter of being "exceedingly arrogant". But in the later books, Harry came to face the hard truth that his father wasn't exactly the perfect person he thought he was (I'm not saying that Severus Snape was an angel, but he was actively bullied by James Potter and his gang so he has every right to loathe him). The only thing that differs in Harry's situation is that he was a lot younger than Adrien when he lost his parents. Harry never knew them, unlike Adrien who spent at least 13 years with his mom.

This is why i think that, even though Emilie was kind and loved her son more than anything, the only thing that Adrien remembers of his mom are the good times. The human mind often tends to choose to forget the bad times to compensate for the loss, and Adrien must have forgotten the bad memories like any person who lost a parent they loved would do (because there must have been bad times, any family as perfect as they want to be cannot be perfect all the time). 

[witchthewriter]

𝐉𝐚𝐝𝐞 𝐨𝐩𝐞𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐮𝐩 𝐭𝐨 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐓𝐨𝐛𝐞𝐲 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐢𝐧𝐜𝐥𝐮𝐝𝐞

⤷ gender neutral, ambiguous race, and any size reader. Requests are open, thank you for reading!

Warnings: gore, dead body, talking about a dead friend

ᴹᵃˢᵗᵉʳˡᶤˢᵗ | ᴹᵃˢᵗᵉʳˡᶤˢᵗ ᴵᴵ

𝑺𝑭𝑾🌿

・Ever since Jade arrived in town (and stopped believing it was some sort of escape...town?) he had never spoken about Tobey. Not uttered a single sentence about him to you, or anyone. Not even Boyd or Kenny...or Mrs Liu (who Jade opened up to, quite a lot)

・The sun filtered through the canopy above, warm against your skin as you sat beneath a large tree.

・You and Jade were catching your breath.

・What was supposed to be a simple outing to scavenge for an experiment, turned out to be anything but.

・Another vision had attacked Jade and he took off running. Being chased by a man with a knife would ... do that to ya.

・His chest was still rising and falling too fast, the remnants of his panic were still clinging to him like vines, yet the worst of it was fading.

・You had caught up and sat beside him, doing your best to calm him down.

・Now your hand rested in his, a small comfort.

・He squeezed and rolled his head to look at you. Softly he whispered, 'thank you.'

・You nodded. How could he not think you would do anything for him? Some days you wanted to scream at Jade:

"I LOVE YOU. I WOULD DO ANYTHING FOR YOU. THE ONLY REASON I AM STILL ALIVE HERE IS BECAUSE OF YOU."

・But you knew it would be too much...

・Without realising it, you had gotten so far inside your own head that you didn't hear Jade speak.

"God I can't believe I'm saying this but...I wasn't like this before."

・You looked at him, empathy practically radiating from you.

・Staying silent, you let Jade speak...

"I had a best friend," his voice is rough, the words completely unexpected. The words surprise even him.

・You don't react, don't push. Just listen.

・Jade stares at his hands, fingers curling slightly in the grass. The sunlight feels too gentle, too warm for the weight pressing on his chest.

"His name was Tobey."

・Those words hadn't been said since he got here. And even before, he never called Tobey his best friend. But that's what he was.

・With a deep inhale, then a slow exhale, he tried to unravel the tight knot in his throat.

・Never before had it been so hard to speak. But your hand squeezed his, a silent reminder that he wasn't alone...that it was okay to be vulnerable.

"He was my friend. My closest friend, he, ah... he understood me. We met in college. We'd sat next to each other in class...And he just wouldn't shut up. Not for a second. He got us both thrown out of class. But I couldn't do anything but laugh. He was this ... funny, smart, ... ridiculous person. And he had this way of looking at me like he knew what I was thinking before I even thought it."

・Jade laughed, but it was so hollow... almost mournful. Reminiscing a time where there was hope, there was a future...

・He went quiet. Letting his mind wander. Letting it leave this fucked up town and remember when life was worth living.

・A small smile grew on Jade's face. When you looked at him, the sunlight warmed his brown eyes. In that moment you escaped too.

・And when he continued talking, it wasn't so sad.

"Tobey...helped me a lot. He knew I wanted to start a company, he also knew I wouldn't do it without him. And guess fucking what - we did it. And we sold it for so much...fucking money."

・With each word Jade grew more and more passionate. His anger turning righteous.

"And then he died."

・The words shattered your heart.

・You couldn't understand how Jade didn't wallow day after day. Letting hatred build up inside of him.

・You just didn't understand how he could keep going.

・Jade pressed his fingers into the ground beside him, nails digging into the earth.

・A tear slid down his face, and it surprised him. Quickly, he wiped it away. Ashamed.

・Turning your body, you grabbed onto Jade's hand and pressed it to your lips.

"He sounds amazing. I wish I could have met him."

・Jade exhaled, squeezing your fingers, and for once, he didn't feel so weighed down. Now someone else knew Tobey. And it gave him comfort.

[kitconnor]

WORKING WITH YOUTUBE QUALITY - HOW TO GET THE BEST RESULTS

helloooo, i recently feel as though i have found the key when it comes to dealing with youtube quality and i thought it was worthwhile sharing! i'm finding that when you're stuck with 1080p videos only, (although there is a lot more 4k downloads these days, thankfully) the quality is pretty poor. BUT, this is speaking exclusively about the quality of youtube 1080p - if you use a site such as sharemania, that's usually acceptable and good quality and doesn't deliver poor results.

but alas, this is about youtube, so let's get into it! this process will simply go over all the ins and outs of working with youtube quality, and will not look into the entire giffing process. i'll be using photoshop 2025, but it should work on any version!

Download your video.

firstly, start by downloading your video with 4k video downloader. (<- this will lead directly to a dl of 4k video downloader if you don't have it already! link is all safe and official <3) i can't really think of any other downloader because i haven't used any apart from this one. it's safe and secure and does a really good job.

you'll want to choose the 1080p option that is the BIGGER file amount. not every video will have that, but i believe that the bigger file size is the youtube premium 1080p. take what you can get with them 😭

2. Load frames, crop, convert to smart object...

just get your normal prep work done! make sure to leave out sharpening. you should essentially just be here:

(if my process looks a bit odd or if, on the other hand, you'd like to know my process, you can check that here.)

3. sharpening.

THIS is the point that changes how your youtube file comes out. often times, you'll find the gif comes out with chunks, squares and overall poor quality. kind of like if i used my regular sharpening:

chunky! gross! trashy! i'm seeing too many pixels and things aren't looking the right way that i'd like. (tbh, it's not the worst i've seen - but you can definitely notice when there's light.) if i went on as it is now and continued to colour it, it would continue to look bad.

so, here's what you'll do.

i use multiple sharpening actions, for different purposes: one for hq downloads, so any movies, tv or downloaded/4k music videos, one making icons and the other for lower quality media and photos. the one that i typically use for youtube quality is @/anyataylorjoy's sharpening action (which many gifmakers use, so i wouldn't be surprised if you do already have it!) which is what you'll use. apply the action, using the 'sharper' lot.

^ that's the settings.

4. sharpening pt 2. (noise)

now, you'll need to add noise to offset how harsh the rest of the gif still comes up.

apply these exact settings onto the gif and ensure that monochromatic is enabled.

sometimes, 2% noise might make it look worse, or not be enough. i personally wouldn't go to anything more than 3%, (i don't think you'll ever want to use 3%) and wouldn't go lower than 1%.

it's grainy looking at the moment, just as is. from here, i'll colour it, and then if i think it's no good, i'll go back and clear the noise filter and toggle it. that's just how the process works, don't stress if it doesn't always go your way 😭 that's just gifmaking!

here's the final product!

and here's another example too, i know this one has a lot going on colour wise, so it can be good to look at it working on something with less bright colours:

as compared to before! before shows the gif was really smooth, as compared to in chappell's, were the lighting was just kind of messing with everything. you're more likely to come across videos that are that weird smooth quality, so i'd say that 7 times out of 10 you'll be applying these settings to something more along the lines of doechii's!

the before :)

[abitofboth]

GOD HELLO YES I’M SORRY IVE ONLY JUST SEEN THIS BUT ABSOLUTELY!!!!

I've started to see more welsh!owen popping up in the fandon recently which is making me SO happy!! it's one of my favourite headcannons for him and honestly, at this point, it's cannon in my eyes lmao

it started for me because I'm welsh myself and I hit all my favourite characters with my welshification beam, but aside from that, one glaring reasoning is his name actually! the origins of 'owen' come from the welsh name 'owain' (pronounced oh-wine) which is a pretty common welsh name.

there's a very famous man in welsh history called owain glyndŵr (oh-wine glind-ooh-er) who was the last native welsh person to hold the title the prince of wales, and he was born in 1359 so it's been a pretty long fuckin time since someone welsh has been on the throne (not that I support the monarchy, but it's worth noting because there's a lot of history between the welsh and the english with a lot of animosity between the two nations). all of this to say, owain glyndŵr led a 15 year long revolt to end english rule in wales, which I think is interesting to think about the comparisons of owen going against the world's leading governments with his work with chimera post-fall, even if the contexts are wildly different lmao. (glyndŵr did a lot of other very interesting things in welsh history which is definitely worth a read about)

I also really love the idea that owen was born in and grew up in wales, then later moved to london when he was a young adult. the thought that once he crossed over the border, he was saying goodbye to his old self and signing his life away to the british government and fully stepping into the world of spies. combined with him then going on to dedicate his life to chimera's cause, it's kind of heartbreaking to play with the idea that once he left wales his life was never really ever his own. he just became weapons for other people.

I also have the hc that he taught himself his RP accent. not so much any more, but back in the day many english people looked down on the welsh (look up the 'welsh not' for example) and I feel like owen would have this fear that his welsh accent would hold him back. he worked with/for the most powerful people in the world, he rubbed shoulders with the british government, he wanted to be respected, he wanted to be in a position of influence within the agency: he was not going to get that if he didn't sound like a rich english man. he had to fake his existence in high society and the easiest way was to force the accent out of himself. I like the idea of him involuntarily slipping back into it when his guard is aaaaaaall the way down (namely, when he feels safe with curt. :') )

speaking of, I LOVE the idea of him throwing in welsh words and phrases every now and then. I don't think he'd be fluent, but definitely knows enough to hold conversations with family etc. he absolutely calls curt 'cariad' (love/darling). 'del' is another cute one that can mean pretty/sweetheart that I think he would like using- “ti’n iawn, del?” would mean "you alright, sweetheart?" which HELLO!! is such an owen phrase to me

I also have a separate owen hc that his favourite book is the hobbit, and tolkien was pretty heavily inspired by wales when writing those books!!

and one last thing because I realise I'm word vomiting here: the welsh word 'hiraeth'. there's no direct english translation for this word, but it's essentially the feeling of a deep longing for something, especially for one's home. I think owen's entire being is stained with this feeling. a grief filled homesickness- whether in the context of his actual home, or the home he finds within curt, he goes kind of mad with it. it's even more heartbreaking to think of this feeling immediately after he fell and was left alone with no home to speak of. owies!!

I've sprinkled welsh owen into a few fics I've written in the past and I love seeing it pop up in other people's fics (one I remember and love was written by @considerablecolors with such a lovely subtle detail of owen's first crush being a boy called gethin) and it's just a hc that I really hold near and dear!! I've probably missed things out that I'd love to talk about but this is very much just a stream of whatever came spewing out first. I'd LOVE to read other people's thoughts and headcannons if anyone is willing to share!! <3

owen carvour my welsh king

[bubbleteaacadamia]

So I just did the first day of a new job and holy shit I absolutely hate it. I'm 3 hours away from being done with the first shift (should be 2 hours but my colleagues decided to work later and they are my ride home), and I'm already overstimulated and socially exhausted.

I've worked other jobs before, but they were mostly just cleaning, this is the first one I've taken with a big social component. I need to get experience in said social component if I want to progress in my chosen career.

I know quite a few people here have autism, is this normal for having it and starting a new job?

[eggsistential-basket]

thinking about the person i could have been if i tried a little harder to find my own way

[sunlessea]

he supposes it doesn't think him the type for such serious reminiscing. how it would have gawked in awe, had it ever met him in his days as a helsing pup proper - such a noble heir he'd once been, with his head held high on his shoulder, presenting himself above everyone around him, most of all masters like itself. he's thankful it hadn't, though. he's not sure he ever could've looked at it with such kindness as he does now, in his time as cassius ashburnum. it never would have trusted him again, had it been irons he had fought that day he burned the bazaar down, rather than mr fires. now, he can rest his hands at either side of its neck and it does not seem to even consider the possibly that he would wrap them around its neck.

the thought had been there, when they'd first begun interacting. it had assumed this a ploy of some sort, to hunt it, surely. in this position, he could kill it, if he tried. catch it by some manner of surprise, and finish a job long forgotten. it trusts him, he notes, as he gently strokes his thumb along its jawline. its ears are flat 'gainst its head, claws gentle alone his sides ... as much as they can be, from a beast not accustomed to playing so nice.

"i believe that you trust me, and i don't think you could trust me if you didn't love me. but i also believe that if someone is incapable of telling another person their feelings out loud ... then they don't love them enough." his answer is honest, where he has not always been. his hands lower from its shoulders again to gently tug at some of the fabric its bundled in, layer upon layer of cloaks. they were already falling off as it had been, but now he parts some of them further. it is only enough, in the end, to expose some small section of its chest - enough that he may slip his hand underneath and sprawl his palm open over the lacking beat of its heart. there's no gentle thrum inside of it, like his own, no candle lit for mr irons to feign its humanity.

he wonders, yet doesn't ask. maybe it's never had very much reason to wish for human things : a heartbeat, air, passion, pleasure, love, tears, raw emotion. just like him, in an age long past. but he desires now, more than anything. enough for both of them, how his heart races, his cheeks flush, his eyes water.

but maybe it isn't so far off.

"how fondly? in what ways do you think of me? fondly enough that you want to kiss me, but not so that you will tell me that you love me. you don't know your own heart, do you? you didn't even know you had one." he is patient, even when he isn't. his own ears flatten, his expression both lonesome and yearning in his understanding. he would wait forever ... but watching the pieces slowly fall into place makes his heart ache. he wants it to love him so badly. he wants it to want him, too. "you say carnality, i just call it romance. i'm used to being misunderstood, but i want you to understand me. as a poet of veilgarden, i've turned down countless men and women in this city who sought carnal pleasure. i can't let someone touch me who doesn't love me. i just can't. my heart is my body and if anyone ever took advantage of my heart, i would kill myself."

his dramatics do not end with everyday banter or vivacious teases - but even through flowery self deprecation, he is so very serious. its hands on his hips stabilize him, however, giving him something to focus on so he doesn't lose himself in romantic reverie. by time he is done with its cloaks, the last bits of them only cling to irons' arms, and that is not something he can push off on his own. so he stares down at it, fingers tracing lines of its muscles once more. his expression is far away, distant, but not sad. he's lost in thought, paying mind to every spot that makes it shudder when his fingers move over them. it's more sensitive than he'd thought.

it grabs his attention again when it speaks, and he looks up at it with wide, doe - like eyes, curious and contemplative. before it even clarifies the heavy burden it offers him, he's taken by it, his tail swaying gently behind him with expectation. the more secure it squeezes his hips as it lifts itself to sit with him on its lap, the faster his tail starts to wag, ears at last perking up once more. for how seriously he'd worn his melancholy, his expression melts easily into tender reverence, smile 'pon his lips with narrowed eyes as their noses touch. he shifts with it, raising his arms up to wrap 'round its shoulders and pull it in closer so they can sit comfortably face - to - face. "you are not a burden, mr irons. your heart is a gift."

maybe he should've expected it to kiss him, how it had been shifting to close the space 'tween them again ... but he is still a little surprised, all the same. the second time it less brutal than the first, and as a result, less awkward - the harsh press of its lips 'gainst his own is much less feral, though still quite rough. it's charming, in a way. he thinks this is its attempt at kindness, and he does not tease it for that. he falls into line, pulling it down harder by its shoulders and letting it part his lips against its once more, 'til its tongue finds his own. he's able to shift in its lap until his legs comfortably rest at its sides, knees pressing into its thighs as his fingers tangle through its hair. its need is met by his own passion, a loving romantic at his core, even in the depths of spiraling desire, albeit of a purer context than his admissions of fantasy would suggest.

humanity is hardly so simple for those born inhuman. to neatly box the wild and often inconsistent flux of its feelings into something kine could comprehend, to balance learned nature with its basal instinct—its love resulting comes intertwined with a certain hunger. and that is difficult to explain, more than just a comfortable warmth against its chest, more than excitement, or an ache in its stomach, it is, above all else, an intense and indomitable craving. it feels it 'cross every inch of its body, inside and out, with every kiss he steals and how earnestly he wraps himself around it.

the way he touches it drives it absolutely mad, in a way it is not wholly certain that it actually minds : it is naught like anything it, personally, had it proffer a more accurate definition, fantasized, and it thinks it might then be the surprise of it that leaves it feeling so willfully captured. his fingers tracing 'gainst subtle ripples of muscle and skin follow a trail so delightfully sensitive in ways it could never have expected, untouched as it had been in its self-imposed isolation. it likes the warmth it feels 'neath his palms, against his body, his breath against its lips the few moments their lips part and how it feels his breathing quiver with each slow, arduous draw of its tongue over the wound begged-open 'neath its teeth; it likes how he always beckons it closer with his blood still on its tongue, deepening their kiss with venture of his own will. it likes how its body cannot decide, in continued conflict of its own heart, if it should purr or growl, and how often it alternates 'tween both muffled by his lips.

not to say that it is without surprise when his body shifts. though it is, perhaps, more muted a shock than t'would otherwise be, were he any other. and it may as well be purely for the lack of force, rather than strength—it feels when his leg hooks even tighter 'cross its back, the subtle pressure of his heel pressing into its side, but this too feels more like he is simply beckoning it follow his lead. and that is the bigger surprise, how simply it relents.

this, yes, has it growl. but that is merely natural response for any predator proper pushed to such a vulnerable point. even fully clothed, having rolled gently 'pon its back with his encouragement, it feels so exposed laying beneath him! it mourns the taste of him, same as the pressure of his lips, but it is stalled in its own personal languishing by how sternly he seems look back at it—it can't recall a moment he's ever been so, even when they'd first met. and that, more than anything, piques its interest and begs its attention.

better would it be the sort of blushing maiden with heat rushing to flood her cheeks at such a thought, than how stone-faced it is in their reality. there is no pretty poetry to weave how it stares up at him, wide-eyed and ears slowly pressing 'gainst its head for cause of ... not embarrassment, quite, but something like— it has heard far cruder things, years passed before they ever crossed paths, but it thinks it is his clarification most that his its chest constrict, fang pulling the soft flesh of its cheek 'neath to chew as it tries to pretend it is not quite so affected as it most certainly is. it is not shy, but it is not ... this particularly brazen, either. he definitely is special.

" do you believe i love you? " its voice feels particularly hoarse, even to it : and it presumes it is only cause for how often it was stolen in their heated exchange, every gasp or moan or plea stifled by each their eager tongues. but even so, its tone is cautious; careful, where what little inflection it is able to offer cannot otherwise be misconstrued for rejection. its chest aches too, feeling how his hands continue making their way 'cross its skin, the bulk of its body, but that nagging pull has grown increasingly familiar in the passing weeks. it considers itself lucky merely only shuddering when his fingers brush over dips along its body that are more sensitive than most. the tension ebbs and flows, but its fixation 'pon him is unwavering.

it thinks its gaze shakes while he speaks, rapt, a subtle quiver align with the occasional shiver that runs its way through its body. it's a far different tone than how he has ever approached it—and yet, it is somehow just the same. desire spoken from the heart, a romantic at his core, no matter how salacious the tale he could weave, he hardly need speak of the love he feels for it for it to comprehend. it hurts when it swallows, 'round the growing lump in its throat.

" it ... is true, the subjects of which my thoughts have drifted to. i have thought about what it might have been like to kiss you more than i am open to admit. though i do— ... did not understand the process. i desired to. i do think of you fondly. in numerous ways, and that is strange to me. " like would he be to forgive it, its quiet voice; barely above murmur, that, as it gradually takes to unraveling its hold 'round his waist, slowly pulling its hands down over his hips as it speaks, " i would never think less of you for carnality. i think you are naive, at your best, but physicality or need for is hardly my concern. i do not understand you, or what you have done to me. of that, i feel as if i no longer know myself. "

his hair tickles its cheek, its jaw; shrouds them where what few parts of its cloaks still cling to it offer little protection from the intensity of his gaze. " it is a heavy burden to ask of you, elysium, but ... " it starts, but pauses soon after; its hands have settled neatly over his hips, and though it does squeeze them long enough to beckon even more of his attention, it uses its tight grip as means to steady itself as it lifts itself up to brush its nose up 'gainst his own. once more, merely a breath apart—and it really does savor the feeling, nearly more than the blood it still knows clings to his lips. and its too, though it's quick to swipe that away as it pulls itself closer to him. hands travelling slow from hip to side, pressing down gently 'long the slight curve of his waist. " —perhaps you might be willing to bring clarity to my own heart? " it has not suddenly become anymore confident in the gesture as it had started. but it is difficult to be too clumsy, this close. no sooner has it finished speaking before it closes the distance; and once more, it pushes its lips hard against his own. not in curiosity, or even impulse : it needs him.

[helpimstuckinafandom]

Me starting another bg3 run where I will make virtually all the same decisions in mostly the same order as if there isn't different branching paths

[wolpatinga]